THE PILONIDAL CYST

Hello, Hello, Hey, what's up?

Hey? How you doing as this?

Nathan?

Yeah? Yeah, yeah, it is methan.

Uh Nathan, what are you? What are you doing?

Uh?

Nothing much. I'm just just just hanging out with my family.

Uh.

I just decided to call in about uh, you know, like you know, you know, I've been having this gas since I was a kid, and you know it's it's it's put a damper on some of my relationships.

Gas. What kind of gas? You mean? Like flatulence?

Like ass gas? Yeah, flatulence?

Ask Okay, listen before I need to know this before we get and it's okay. If the answer is yes, we can still have the conversation. But I just need to know before we dive into this. Are you fucking with me?

No? I'm not, No, not at all.

Do you promise I swear, I swear swear you're not with me.

I promise I'm not fucking with you?

Okay, because I read the whole family recognized your whole family is what.

They've They've called it a problem of mine as well, even some of my teachers throughout school.

Where are you right now? Do you live alone?

No? No, at the moment, I'm living with my mom my, sister and my niece.

Can I talk to your mom?

Yeah? Yeah, he wantn't.

Talk to you.

Hello?

Hi, what's your name?

My name is Mace's mom. I probably can.

Double m Your son tells me that he has a flatulence problem? Would you say that that is accurate?

No?

I got it is perfectly your accurate and then some And honestly, I think this could be maintained with diet control. But he just loves to eat all the crappy foods.

What does he eat?

Oh, we're talking ice cream, dairy burgers, all the things that cheese, all these things that just really irritates his bowels more. And you know it's it. Sometimes he can clear a room house.

Actually what now, I'm kind of now hold on all right, so and just bear with me on this. You know how your farts smell kind of good, not good, but like you you know what I mean, you know what I mean. I do have to explain this.

They're acceptable to me. I think that's okay.

Right. So the fact that so, like when my mom farts, it smells bad, But is there a thing where like because I don't know, is there a thing that like, because your son came out of you and has similar biology whatever, chromosome, you know, all that stuff. Is it possible? Does do any do his farts? Not one hundred percent, but at least half of them smell good to you?

Not at all, not at all.

In fact, sometimes I can't stand my own I am very conscientious and mindful about what I eat, specifically for that reason.

Yes, the call screener when they were writing down notes on Mason, they wrote that Mason told them that he farts at least what does it fit? Hold on, hold on, let me pull this up real quick. Uh, wait a minute, he said fifteen times a day. That's not that bad. He far He's got a far way more than fifteen times a day.

Yeah, I think that is some some I think that's simply super modest.

Honest, he's uh, he's fudging the numbers one.

Big times, big time.

Yes, yeah, okay, So have you talked to Mason about a you know, I don't know, eating better or oh.

Definitely eating When he was younger, you know, I would try and control the onches we packed and the kind of food ta And now that he's older, it's just it's it's ridiculous. I mean, he does what he wants.

Do you guys have a yard or or a front porch or something somewhere, some space that Mason could claim as his own to fart in, and a deal everyone would stay out of that space and leave him alone in that space. But he can fart.

There, absolutely that. I think timeliness is the problem. Getting from point A to point B in a timely manner, that's the problem.

So the farts that he can't even hold them in, they just rock it out of his ass against his own will.

Yes, yes, yes.

And has he been doing this since he was a young child or is this a recent thing? Oh?

Yeah, no, no, no, this has always been always This is just one of those things. I think he's lactose intolerant. I don't think beef and meats agree with his He is diet well, I don't know. Definitely the dairy though, that's a huge factor.

Well, missus mom, thank you very much for talking to me about this. I'm gonna I'm gonna wrap.

Up real question.

Yep, yep.

Here he is Mason. Hello, Mason, would you look man here, I'm going to level with you here because I you know, all the stuff that your mom says that you shouldn't be eating is like, I mean, she described my diet as well. So I'm not gonna you know, I'm not going to preach to you.

So do you have a guest too?

Oh? Extremely? Would you have you ever farted in your mom's face?

No? No, no, but like I farted like bad enough to where it was like like it punched her in the face, Like I did.

You know, would you concede to at least going outside next time you fart so that she doesn't have to deal with it? Would you do that for your mom?

Yeah? Yeah, you know I've tried doing that. You know what is you know what about when I'm sleeping?

You know, okay, you can get a pass when you're sleeping, But I mean, how far away are you guys's.

Bedrooms downstairs and upstairs and it's just like a straight channel?

Yeah all right?

Uh, I mean, look, it seems like a problem that can be solved by you sort of claiming your own territory farting and hopefully respecting that territory.

That's true, that's true. I guess I just gotta, you know, take that that extra time and not be lazy and just kind of take other people's senses, you know, such a smell into consideration before I decide to you know, fart.

Yeah, absolutely, I'm glad we could come to a breakthrough here, Mason. I appreciate you calling in. You have good rest of the night.

Yes, you too, got go.

You know, I believe Mason's mom when she says that Mason's farts don't smell good to her. But it kind of bums me out that I my scientific analysis wasn't right, because it's sounds right like if I feel like it would make sense that if you bear a child, the child's farts would smell good to you in the same way that your farts smell. Okay, maybe as as his mom said, tolerable. Maybe maybe good is too much of

Yo.

One of my fucking ah God, sorry, if I look like common pain, one of my toes is uh like it won't go up, like there's some sort of muscular atrophy in my toe. It won't. You know, how you can take your toe and you can like go like that, whether you can lift I can't lift up my toe. Any medical experts in the chat know how long I have left to live with this toe thing. I should get it cut off? Well, that would solve the problem. I guess. Let's sick A phone call? Hello, Hey, Hi,

How are you doing?

Get Chase? I'm doing pretty well. Actually my toe thing has gotten mildly better, although I need to see a doctor because I've I've been eating very shittily and it could be diabetes. But who knows enough about me and my things? What's going on with you? Chase?

So I got pretty hurt a few years ago. I got I with a little context. I play Alert. It's a full contact sport. We play with like big foam swords, and it's kind of like Lord of the Rings, but you know, with foam and broke my nose had two really black eyes, to the point where I couldn't see for about a day and a half because they were I lost a lot of my memory, like my short term memory is it's garbage, and I've lost about eight years of my life, like my childhood. I can't remember.

Interesting you lost eight years of memory, so when the accident happens, you can no longer remember eight years of your childhood.

Approximately between ages eight to well, now I would say they're like ten to fourteen. No, I'm sorry, my math is bad.

Eight to sixteen?

Eight to sixteen? And did the accident happen when you were sixteen?

It happens when I was Oh gosh, how old am I twenty one?

Have your twilet? That's so interesting that the accident affected such a specific age range.

Yeah, so I worked with a neurologist for maybe two or three months. That doesn't really sound like too long, but you know, they did mririse and they looked through and they're like, hey, I mean you look all right. There's definitely a little bit of damage, but as long as you don't get hit like that, you'll be all right. And then when I asked about my memory, they kind of shrugged and it's like, well, you know, maybe it'll come back, maybe it won't. Okay, cool, awesome.

I mean, look on the bright side, I feel like there's a lot of people out there that wish that they couldn't remember the ages of you know, twelve to fourteen, and at the very least, you know, that's totally fair.

I'm sure there are a blunch of things, like there are definitely some things that people have told me who knew me around that time, like in middle and high school, where they're like, oh, yeah, no, I did this one like embarrassing or terrible thing, Like well, I mean if I did anything like that, you.

Don't even remember. That's pretty good. You don't remember the embarrassing stuff that you did when you were.

Twelve exactly exactly, and we all do embarrassing things when we're that age.

So do what about? So I'm curious, So did you attempt to put the pieces back together of ages eight to sixteen by talking to other people in your life? Did they help you remember things from that time?

So I'm not in contact with many people that I went to school with, Like some of the people that I did go to school with do play the same game, And I have asked them a few questions and they've helped fill a few gaps. I've asked my mom. Apparently I was a little uh, I was a rebellious child apparently, and which I totally believe. So my mom's like, oh, yeah, you never really told me anything. I don't really remember anything around then except for what happened around me.

Which is totally fair.

I did ask her if my memory was always as bad because for a few years, because I asked her this very recently, like last month, like, Hey, has my memory always just been this bad? Like no, absolutely not,

What is it? What does that process of excavation look like?

So what they do is they'll ask very general questions like, Hey, where did you go to school and what did you like to like how did you dress? And what were your friends like stuff like that, like what did you do in your spare time? And depending on my answer, she would go a little little deeper, like where did I get the clothes? And like who bought them for me?

Stuff like interesting? So very like, I mean, these are like, these are very very specific questions. Like even if I, even if I didn't have memory loss, probably couldn't answ or some of these questions about certain times.

That's fair.

I don't remember what the fuck I wore, you know, two days ago.

Ah, now that I think about it, I don't think I did either. Probably the same thing I'm wearing now, not to sound like gross, like not the exactly the same. Oh, look something similar, you know.

Look I've been wearing. This is not a joke, This is not a lie. This is a reality of my life. I think I've been wearing the same pair of jeans every day for at least a month.

Okay, So I was actually recently told that that is actually the point of denam. So if anybody tells you that you're gross for wearing the same pair of jeans for like over a month, and tell them that that's just how they keep their.

Shape, you might be my favorite caller in the history of this entire stream.

Oh, I'm so glad to hear that, But thank you very much for saying that.

That's that's the most incredibly rare sharing because I it took I was considering not not telling anyone that because I'm not joking, right, I mean, I mean I acknowledge that it's funny, but I it's might be over a month. I mean it's the same pair. I guess I only got one pair of jeans that that fits me now, so it's I've been wearing that one for at least a month and a half. I mean, if it.

If it makes you I know you said you were already reassured, but if it does make you feel better, I don't wear them consecutively, but I definitely yes, chat is gonna be really gross. I try to wear my jeans at least three or four times before they're washed, or if they just get like really snowy, I will wash them. But you know, you gotta you gotta keep their you gotta keep their shape.

Man.

Now, what's your opinion on underwear? How many times in a row can you wear a pair of underwear?

It depends, it really really depends. Like I train at the gym, I cannot rewear those. That's just that's just a one way street to east infections. But if say, like you know, you put on a pair of pants or excusing part underwear and you're just lazing about being bed for a day and then you have like work the next day.

Yeah, it's a changing you put it.

You can take a shower, like I highly recommend changing him. But like you know, it's okay as long as you don't sweat. As long as they don't smell you's good.

I agree. I agree A day is a man made concept and it doesn't have any actual effect on the underwear itself. So I agree with you that unless if there was strenuous activity that you know, uh, drenched the underwear and sweat, then you know you should be able to wear it for as long as you know, until it wears out. Anyway, what the what if you don't mind me asking what was the accident? I know you don't, I mean, do you do? You do you even know? Oh?

Absolutely so. It was actually out of practice for the larp we were lined up. It was about I think we had like twelve ish people at the practice. There are about five people on each side in what's called a line fight or a ditch. I was my partner at the time, and I were training to you know, like kind of be you know, partners on field. We were working on teamwork. So I was at one side of his and I was trying a new kit so like a sword in a shield, and he had a

You know.

At that point, I had no idea what had happened. One one minute, I was holding this barred sword and shield. Next time, the next thing I knew, I was looking at my lacrosse gloves and they were, you know, covered in blood, and I remember thinking like, oh, I don't remember this having blood when I bought them at the plate again. And then we had a an E. M. T. Who was also playing with us.

And he.

Kind of like he kind of like strolls up to He's like, hey man, he's good. I look out up at him.

I was like, yeah, I'm good.

He needs to take a weights for me, and he's like, maybe you should go sit down. So I go sit down on the bench. He you know, does his whole like triage, like, hey, how many fingers am I holding up? We ears it, all that good stuff, and you know, answered his questions and he's like, all right, I can't do anything here. I don't have any of my equipment. You should go to an urgent care. So the people I went with drove me to an urgent care. They were it was maybe six pm at this point. We

So at this.

Point I don't remember who contacted my parents. I think it was my partner because they were pretty close at the time too, and so they picked me up. They dropped me off at the ER. I don't exactly remember what happened at the ER. I just remember them saying like, hey, you should probably get your your nose set so your septum doesn't mess with you in the future. Like, okay, cool, are you guys going to do that?

They were supposed to.

They didn't.

They just didn't do it.

No, so now I have made in this.

Sorry, you're having a lot more trouble than I would have hoped finding medical attention.

They didn't do too terribly much. They just kind of looked at me and they're like, yep, that's broken, and then sent me home. Wow, and then they take me like fifteen hundred dollars or something.

Really, they just looked at you and they build you fifteen hundred.

Bucks basically, so hold on.

So, just to reiterate apologies for the graphic content. Warning, uh do do? Did the fucking sword just went up your nose?

Like?

What? What? Where was the impact?

The impact was about it's across the bridge of my nose. Where about Like imagine a line from the corner of your right eye up towards your left temple, So it's right smack dab on the bridge of my sholes. Wow, and I have I actually have a little uh nerve damage. Like I can feel when things like poke, say, like the feet. It was like the tip of my nose all the way up the bridge to a litttle bit of my left eyebrow. I just I can't really. I can feel when things touch it, but that's that's about it.

That's about it.

And you're you can barely breathe through.

Your nuts, so it's like a twenty eighty favoring the right nostril.

Yeah, did your partner feel and your partner was his sword that struck you?

Yeah?

How did he feel about this? Was he like?

Was he?

Does he feel guilty?

Like?

What are his thoughts? Are you still with him?

No, so we're still it's a little complicated with him. I still care about him. I consider him one of my like I still care about him a lot. I know he still cares about me. At the time, Oh my gosh, he felt so freaking dad. I felt I felt bad for how bad he felt. One of his main concerns was, uh, he's like Oh my god, your dad's gonna hate me all of this. And I looked at him like, buddy, boy, my dad's gonna think it's hilarious. And he did.

He thought it was he thought it was funny.

Oh my god.

Yeah. I mean it is like I'm out here playing dork swords, you know, based off of Lord of the Rings.

And face gets rocked.

Yeah. Like, that's one of the funniest things. I cherished, this memory. That's one of the funniest things that's ever happened to me.

Well, I'm glad that you have a good attitude about it. I mean, all all positives, you get a funny story, you get to forget what it was like when you were a stupid kid. Yeah. I guess the only thing is that you have this. I guess you could call it PTSD whatever from from LARPing. Do you think the you will larp again? Or are you or have you retired?

So I do still go to events, like I keep I keep active as much as I can, Like I sew a lot, so I make garb like tunics and cloaks and quilt and stuff like that. But when it comes to fighting, I think I've only fought at an event maybe twice since then, it's been about I want to stay with five six years since I broke my nose, and I can spar like there's it depends on who

You know, Well, it's cool that you got the Oh I was just gonna say, it's cool that you've got the whole the sewing thing because you get to stay involved with the community even though and not at the fight.

Oh.

Absolutely, And I'm very I'm very thankful for that, and it's one of my It's one of my favorite pastimes.

Like I sew.

Almost every day now, even if it's just like practicing selling straight lines.

Well, watch out for that needle. What did you say your name was?

My name is Chase.

Chase. Thank you very much for sharing your story. Is there anything else you want to say before we Before we go?

I hope you have a great night, and I enjoy I enjoy the way that your podcast is edited. I think it's quite lovely, and your screener is very lovely as well.

Thank you very much for all the kind words. I will try my best to have a good evening and you do as well. Chase have a good name.

Thank you.

You two guys.

What's your name?

My name is Will?

Will? What's going on with you?

Will?

Tell me everything?

Thing?

Tell me nothing?

Ah well, well, I've been calling since the beginning of the stream tonight and I want to talk about a little bit of a medical issue that I recently went through. Apparently it's pretty common, That's what everyone's been telling me.

And I don't know.

I'm not looking at the chat right now. I know how you feel about that. Sure, it's called a PI.

I I have had a pollen iidyl cyst. I have had You had a pollenidyl cysty. It's a little fucking it's a cyst that's not inside of your asshole, but it's like right on the top, yes, right, it's right at the crest of your ass.

Okay, Well, oh my god, So it is pretty common then.

Huh, I've had I had, I had one right at the crest of your ass. Itels like you have like a like a big fucking like lump. You can't you can barely sit down with it. It's no, it's it's not fun.

Yes, well, mine had an uh an ab set m that that I had to get like surgically cut like lant and removed. M hm did you have Did you have to go through that too?

I got lucky. I. I just took a bunch of antibiotics and it went away on its own. I I I. I was told I might have to go in for surgery, but if the antibiotics didn't work. But the antibiotics ended up working.

Uh.

Yeah, Yeah, you definitely got lucky.

So I had to make my way to a like a priority character type place.

Mm hmm.

Now I did a little research mm hmm, you know, pulled it up like on my phone, showed them exactly what I had, and yeah, they had to, you know, go ahead and and cut me open lance it. They said, the doctor said it was probably about like two cups of like puffs and blood that came out.

But that was who you said? Two cups of blood?

About two cups of puffs and blood?

Did he say how did he say, like the percentage of what percent was puss and what percent was blood.

Not exactly. I'd probably say about seventy thirty plus the blood.

Ratio seventy thirty in favor of puss, Yeah, probably favorite in favorite puss. Where did where do? Where do you even dispose of that much puss and blood? It's like two cups?

Is well?

You know, like when you go to the doctor, there's always that little bin like the bio hazard been when I was, I was in so much trauma, Like okay, so the cutting of it open wasn't that bad, Like it was more of a relief, you know.

Oh yeah, I bet that. I bet getting that fucker drained felt pretty good.

That felt great.

But the worst is that with the access they have to pack it with with disinfectant gauze. They have to

And they could probably hear you out there.

Oh oh yeah, yeah, they could hear me.

That probably was very unnerving for them.

I would I would assume it was on my way out, like after uh, you know, leaving the place, I feel great afterwards, after the fact that.

It's like, yeah, okay, so after everything, after the most excrucious so the gauze it sounded like, was the horrible part, but the after everything is said and done, you feel good.

Yeah. Yeah.

On my way out, I'm like, you know, I'm strutting out of this place, but you know, I'm getting all these crazy stares from all the people in the waiting room there.

All right, but you got this, but you also you got this big smile on your face, right, so they're like, I don't know what he was doing in there, but I want that.

Yeah yeah, yeah, probably a little bit.

But yeah.

So so you know, they say, like, you know, leave the packing in for like two days and then come back and you know.

We'll see what's up with it. Go back two days.

Later, and I'm like, okay, they're gonna take it out and then everything's gonna be good.

Right, Yep, that didn't happen.

Nope, They're like, oh, we have to pack it again.

And my stomach just turned inside out just thinking like oh my god.

Like I have to go through that again.

Yeah, similar thing like yeah, I mean they're screaming like it hurts, Like hell.

Why does it hurt so much that they are packing? Gall Is it like a hole in your ass? Crest? Or like what are they packing?

Pretty much?

They have to because if they let the wound close up with the abscessed, like when the syst is an abscessed, then it'll just come back and they'll just have to cut it open again and.

Repeat the process.

So they have to pack it to keep the.

Wound open.

So that it can continue to drain and then yeah, so so won't come back.

M So now wait a minute. So when they cut it open though, when they cut it open, did they put you to sleep?

Nope?

Because this was kind of like does that cost extra?

Like I had to get this thing cut out? Like it was so bad?

Yeah, you know, I mean he like did look like he injected it with like a numbing type of thing. I don't know.

What exactly it is. I'm not a doctor, you.

Know, novacane perhaps something like that, but he said it's really not going to have any effect because of how deep it was, Like I'm gonna be in pain regardless, mm hmm. And so okay, So how is how is your ass doing?

Now?

Like all all said and done, after it's all over, How's how is the crest of your ass?

You know, the crest of my ass is is much better?

I mean, uh, no pain, no gain, you know, like.

I better beautiful.

And uh you know, the act of care was pretty crazy because my fiance had to uh help me like take care of it, you know what I mean, like putting like covering it up and everything.

With cream and bless her, Yeah, yeah, did.

She's a hero. You've given me, Well, listen, you've given me a because I had a pollenidal sista, I'm you've given me a greater appreciation for those antibiotics. Did you did you try you? Did you try the antibiotics before they did the whole thing with the gaze and all that, Like.

After they had cut it out and everything, you know, they prescribed me antibiotics so that would prevent it from like from coming back.

And will will well, well, thank you very much for for sharing. Uh is is there anything else that you want to say before we go?

I just want to shout out everyone in the chat. I want to shout out, uh you lyle geg. You know it's crazy. I feel blessed because it's it's my first night joining the stream and calling in and everyone who's been trying to call in. I just say, uh, you know, don't give up like.

Like you guys.

You guys got this and you know I love you all and I hope the best for everyone, beautiful.

Thank you very much for the kind words. Will you have a good rest of the.

Night, are you too? Thanks?

Hello?

I Hey, can you hear me? Oh? Yeah, what's up? What's your name?

My name is Gree.

Your name is Brie. What's up, Brie? How's mm hmm? I'm sorry my it's the foot thing again. I'll figure it out. Oh what were you gonna say?

I think I know what Uh, I think I know what somebody was talking about in the chat. Neuropathy sometimes bad circulation.

Yeah, I'll I'll just cut it off tomorrow. What's going on with you?

Bree?

Enough about me and my stupid body.

Not my I actually also just hurt my little body. I didn't hurt my foot, though I burned my arm making a case idea.

You burned your arm making a case idea I did. Indeed, how often and how often do you make case ideas?

I made one yesterday and I made one today. It's been about a month since I made kase idia since.

Then, And isn't it amazing the human brain? You can go off full month without making case ideas, and yet when and then when you go to make them again, you you still remember how to make them.

I am pretty shocked by that, because I I do not remember a lot of things.

You don't remember a lot of things. Do you remember the last thing you forgot?

Shockingly? I do, because it was important?

M What was it?

I had until the fourth to call in and get a service protection agreement signed for a car that I recently got, and I realized as I was leaving to get into my car today that it was the first that I only had a couple more days to do that.

Oh well, I mean you got it done though, right, Yeah? You know? Look, I don't what's your name again, Brie? I don't blame you, Brie. Life demands far too much of us. I myself can only be bothered to do one thing a day, So that's three hundred and sixty five things a year, which is a lot, I think. But I mean no, I don't blame you for forgetting that I have parking tickets that I haven't paid from, like you know twenty nineteen. Oh man, You know how they say to you know how they say to build

I just don't agree with parking tickets.

Why are stupid?

You know, I used to live in like a college town and you couldn't park on the on the road at all, but that was like the only place to park. And I didn't get a I almost got a parking ticket, but I got my car, my mom's car booted, not even mine, a boot on my mom's car. They made me pay like one hundred dollars to get it off when it was somewhere that I was allowed to park. But I guess they informed people, not me, that they

So on the call screening, you said that you were training to be a mortician.

I did, I did say that.

And how's that going?

You know, it's going pretty well. I don't know. When I started, I didn't think I was going to go to college, and then I ended up going to college because this is what I really wanted to do, and it's been it's been pretty good.

You Actually, I have two questions prompted about what you just said. You why do you initially not want to go to college?

Uh?

I thought I thought it was worthless and that it would be a waste of my time because I'm not I wouldn't consider consider myself a very uh yeah, smart, gifted with knowledge.

Books, smart type of person, sure study studious academicalists. So so uh to bring me on a journey through the mind of somebody who actively desires to become a mortician? Where does that? Where does that desire come from?

So weirdly enough, I started looking into kind of like.

The death field.

When I was a young, a young kid, a young lad. I was probably nine, and I wanted to do forensics really bad, and I went to a college in Illinois for an open house. Yeah, called went for an open house and talked to some of the people who had just graduated and some of the professors, and they were like, yeah, we can't get fucking jobs. We've been doing this for like fourteen years and I'm just a professor. And I was like, oh, okay.

That's cool.

I've wasted most of my life wanting to do this. And then when I was leaving, this guy like kind of beckoned me and he was like, hey, do you want to you want to mess with dead people? You should look into this deeper. And it's only four years instead of a million. I was like, oh, okay, that sounds that sounds nice.

When you're talking about a man beckoning you from like a dark alley or something, I imagine he says to you something like I heard that you like death.

Actually he was weird.

Really that's what he said, he said, I That's what he said verbatim. He said, I heard that you like death.

Yeah.

It was very creepy because it was kind of like dimly lit in his area. So he like very like quickly and quietly approached me, and he's like, I got something to show you, and I was like, uh, I don't know if I should follow you, but I'm in a I'm in a well populated space, so I.

Guess that's fine.

So you're hanging out with dead people all the.

Time, I am, I actually live in a funeral home.

Do you ever develop crushes on them? Like you find a dead guy that you think is cute and you're like, I wish I got to know this guy.

So far that has not happened.

Mm hmm. Is that, like, I'm curious? Is that like a breach of like code or something?

Uh, you know, probably moral code sure for me. I don't know how many people would mind that.

I would like, oh, what have you heard?

Uh?

Oh?

Man oh, I don't know if I could actually Yeah, okay, I'll just go ahead. There was this kid at school we got we usually get in older people at school, like man, I bet he was a stallion back in the day.

M hmm.

I was like, you know, I'm seeing this man and I just I couldn't imagine saying that. I'm thinking about that right now.

So there was a there was another student at your school studying death and they brought in cadavers, right, yes, yeah, And the kid was looking at the cadavers, penis, he was just looking.

At all of him. We have a modesty cloth that we have to put on them, Okay, so I will or not. I will not say if that modesty class was on or off.

I don't know. I feel like, look, if I'm a dead body and I'm on my way out like to never, I mean because look, if you're a dead body, you're on your way out to never being your body never gets seen again. So you know, I mean just me personally, me personally, if somebody said that about my dead body, I'll be like, look good, let me get a couple more compliments to take to the grave with me for

For its thinking about too lately. I'm like, I don't know. I just came to the realization yesterday actually that people who I don't intend to hear me are always watching me. I have a class of about fifty people, and I sit like right up front, and I was like, man, if people are perceiving me like this in life, you know, when I die and if I get cremated or buried or something so ever, handling my body is also going to have like an idea or thought about me as

And I realized that.

Only people that you and tend to perceive you actually are the ones that perceive you, when in reality it is it's far not the case.

Yeah, especially like right now, I'm just thinking, I'm having a one on one chat with you, and there's there's a lot of people watching.

No, I don't look I mean with something like this, it's like I mean, ultimately probably with the podcast whatever, there's probably whatever it's you know, yeah, sure there's a couple of thousands of people listening to this voice right now, but it doesn't I don't know. They're not they're not in they're not with us right now. They're computer people. They're not even real.

That's true. That is true in real I think.

No, in real life it is way worse. That's why I'm you know, that's why it's so easy to drown it out when you know. It's like you look at the twitch thing and you look at the podcast thing and you see the numbers, and you're like, this is computer people. You know, this is the Internet. It's not real. What did you say? Your name was, Brie brid It's been a pleasure talking to yours. Anything else that you want to say to the people before.

We go, I just want to say thank you so much. You know you hear all the time, but what you're doing is wonderful. We love you, we support you, and one day I hope that one of us could be your therapy.

Deckom Well, thank you very much for the kind words, Britt. I appreciate that very much. And thank you for all the good that you do for dead people with big penises.

Thank you.

I have aggress the night.

Hi you too.

It is an interesting thing being perceived, you know what. But it's and people mentioned this with the podcast right or in the show. They're like, oh, I'm being you know, people all in and they're like nervous because they're being they feel themselves being perceived. And when I'm here right now, the whole time I'm here and I'm talking I don't know what it is. I can't describe it. I don't know if it's a I felt this way when there was no one watching this, and I feel this way

But hello, Hello, I'm gonna shit myself.

Why are you going to ship yourself?

Because I'm excited, Bro. You were on my top spotify wrapp. I've been listening to your shitting non stop.

Thank you, man, I appreciate that very much. Hmm. What is your name, Ketam and how did you get that name? Were you born with that name or did you acquire it later in your life?

I've acquired it?

And how did you acquire?

I hung out with a bunch of wooks. Are you familiar with the phrase wok?

I'm slightly familiar with the phrase. Look. I used to I had a brief phase. And when I say brief, I'm talking like like in the like the span of a couple of weeks where I was into you know, jam bands or whatever, like the Grateful over in the in the Donnie and the Ween and all that. And I'm pretty sure a wook is somebody who's really into those bands. Is that?

What?

Accurate and accurate statement?

I would take that out as an accurate description, although nowadays I feel like it also leans more towards the US ed M people.

Interesting because I feel like E ed M and jam band people. Well, not no, not the people. The music is very.

Different, that's very true.

But there's overlappingness within both categories.

Interesting, and what would you say? That overlappingness is.

Probably drugs and dancing.

Drugs and dancing. What kind of drugs are we talking about here?

I mean your average things. You got your m DMA, you got your kedemy, you got your I don't know all the good things test, all the things test.

It's only now ketamine. I don't know a lot about ketamine, but I've heard that it's similar. I've heard it's like a horse tranquilizer. That might be wrong. I don't know anything about anything, but is that Is it a horse tranquilizer.

It's a horse tranquilizer, so I have there's so many fun jokes to be made about that. It's very popular down in the South, so we got horses and horse trangquilizers. A lot of people like justifying it by saying that it helps with like depression, because there are medical like depression treatments with ketemy which are super cool. But these bitches ain't using it medically. They're turning up on.

Tuesdays, They're turning up on tuesdays. Yep, I have. I have heard that it could be used medically for like depression and stuff.

It's very helpful for chronic pain. I can attest it.

Mm hmm. So how often are you out doing doing ketamine?

Oh? Never anymore? Everyone else do sit there?

Okay, so you quit.

Yeah, we had the fun period, but I almost died partying. So I got over it and now I just go out and go to shows.

SOB that's good to hear. So well. Okay, So at one point you were doing ketamine enough to have earned the moniker of ketamine of a look. Yeah, absolutely, So tell me about the night that you almost died. What happened?

That was fun? So that was actually on Mollie. So I have a heart condition, don't do drugs or park start yep, it's a great place to start. So I think I did, like, did a bunch of Molly out of ed m concert, got back to a shitty hotel and started turning blue from losing but circulation to my whole body. So that was fun.

Yeah.

I ended up dislocating a few ribs in my chest permanently from it. So that's lit.

You dislocated in your chest like did you?

Yeah?

Was was it?

Was?

It like the Molly disloke went into your body and took your Let me like what happened.

So basically, there's a few things that play here. There's a collagen disorder that makes your joints dislocate every single day. That's a thing that people live with, just a thing interesting. It's a genic disorder, and the also a heart condition. So basically you see in horror movies how you see people's veins pop out of their bodies like like a alien. That's what happened to my whole body. Yeah, I could see like all of the veins in my whole body.

Huh, you didn't want to go Why do you want to call for medical help? Were you embarrassed that they would make fun of you for your broken rib cage?

I mean, partially, I think I was afraid of getting in trouble with the law. Do the scenario, and also was like, just like my brain was like, don't send me to rehab. Don't send me to rehab.

So okay, but so now you no longer. You now no longer do Catman.

Yeah, I don't do anything, And then I also go to shows and am able to still surround myself with it and say no, which I think is pretty badass.

I think that's pretty nice too, because a lot of the time, I feel like if you're trying to quit, some you gotta. I mean, everyone's sort of built different with their ability, their their willpower and whatnot. But I feel like it's a whole thing to be able to go into into the environment constantly again where where the drugs are being done, and still be able to not only resist doing them but also have a good time without them.

That's the real struggle. Bus But I work a lot of shows now and I spin fire at shows and perform, So you got to be sober to do that.

See, I don't know if I could do that. You know, there's certain here's let me ask you before we go. Before we go, I actually need to know a question from you. Do you think if you if there's a certain genre of music or a certain or I wouldn't even limit this to music, a thing, any activity that not that you enjoy better when you're under the influence of drugs. But that you only enjoy under the influence of drugs. Do you believe that you truly enjoy that activity?

Do I believe that I truly enjoy it sober? Or do you believe that you can truly only Ah, that's a big question there, GaX. Will you rephrase it for me?

What I'm saying is if you have an activity that you like, but you only like it when you're impaired, not you like it more? Like like I like going to the movies, but I like it more when I'm stoned, But I don't only like it when I'm stoned. But if you have a thing that you only like when you're impaired, do you like it?

My big thing is if you have people that only want to hang out with you when you're fucked up, they're not your friends. And if you can only do something when you're fucked up, then it's not really fun.

Well, there we go. Thanks for calling ketebin.

Yeah, no problem, gak be Well.

I hope nobody notices that I'm on Kennebine right now. Hey, folks, it's Lyle here with an extremely brief message, just letting you know that if you are interested in supporting the stream and making it easier for me to do more therapy Gecko stuff in the future. You can head on over to patreon dot com slash lyle forever and for only five dollars you can make it a heck of a lot easier for me to put this whole shebang together. That is Patreon dot com slash lyle forever. You also

Hello? Wait? Am I?

Yes?

Am I actually on?

You're on? Holy holy crap, what's going on? Dude?

That's uh. I've been trying to call in for like a month and a half.

Now, oh my god, this is it. This is the moment. There's a lot of pressure.

Yes, no, well I don't need pressure.

No no, no, Look, well, Gabby, can I ask you before we go into this, because you you know, I mean, what if, okay, if this call in your mind went perfectly right, what would that I mean, what would that even look like?

Honestly, just being on the call itself, It's just perfect.

That's perfect because That's the thing is people I people all the time. They come in here, they're like, I don't want to fuck this up. And there's no objective, there's no goal, there's nothing to fuck up. So you've already won and lost at the same time because there's no game. Yeah, what's going on, Gabby? What did you call on to talk about?

Oh? Just honestly to get like a perspective on something I'm happy in my life from somebody that doesn't know me.

Sure. Sure.

So I work at a job that I put in my two weeks already, but it's it paid.

Me really well.

I'm taking it like eighteen an hour. But the only thing about it was the job itself wasn't bad.

It was the people.

And like I've been very anxious because, like you know, like I said, I put in my two weeks, I'm going to a lower paying job, and like I can't tell it was a bad idea or not, because it is going to make financial everything a little rough doing that.

So you went from a higher paying job to a lower paying job primarily because you you couldn't stand with the people you were working with at that higher paying job. Yeah, Uh, I don't think that's a bad decision at all, because you know, look, work is like what one hundred percent of your time something like that. You know, you're just there for hours and hours and hours. If you've got to be somewhere for hours and hours and hours, you know you shouldn't you should you should enjoy being there,

Yeah?

Did you absolutely fucking hate being there? Yeah?

I I honestly there. I've been mornings before I went to my job to put my two weeks in that I just kind of cried before.

Oh you did the right Gabby, you did the right thing. Uh, what's the new gig? Tell me about the new gig?

Though?

What's what was so appealing about the new gig.

It's a smaller store, it's a lot more friendlier, Like they're kind of built on the actual like being a family working together, communicating.

And it's a lot less strick than all of the rules.

So like, if I don't want to take a fifteen minute break two hours into my shift. That's okay. As long as I eventually get to a break, I want to get yelled at for it. And the expectations are a lot less.

So you like the rule that you don't have to take breaks?

Yeah, because sometimes it messes up my flow. Whenever I'm like going at it and then I have to stop take a break, then it takes me a while to want to get back to work.

You know. Well, it sounds like you're an employer's dream, I.

Like to think.

So, yeah, are there any other like rules that you hated about the old place that you like about the new one that they don't have or whatever?

Mostly the fact of it wasn't like a set rule, but the way the management was set up it was very strict, like you couldn't even look at your manager wrong without being up for coaching or firing, which was just no fun.

Gabby. You know, I'm glad that you know. I mean, look, take solace and uh no, it was a good decision. If you're crying before you are going into work, you should fucking quit. Yeah, is there anything else you want to talk about, Gabby before we go?

Not?

Really?

That was that was kind of all I know it's kind of lame, but you know it did.

Why do you think I'm really curious, actually, why do you think that's lame?

I've been listening to your podcast since you started it. I didn't really have time to watch your streams as much, and like, there's just so many interesting calls, and then I just call in about like, oh, did I make a right decision about me in quitting my job type thing?

No? I mean, I mean I think this is interesting. I mean, look, it's it's it's not like an epic tale, but it's reflective of a common human experience that people have all the time. So it had it had it was valuable to share in of that, I believe.

Yeah, And it's.

Definitely like a hard decision. But I feel like because my boyfriend's done some of the things, he's quit workplaces that weren't like the best situation management was ass and stuff like that, and it's it's it's harder for some people, but I feel like when you get confirmation that was a good idea and you're able to move forward, it does help a lot. So stress can make you physically sit sick.

I've learned that.

Well, I'm glad to hear you made the right decision, Gabby and appreciate you call.

Of course.

Hello Bobby.

Whoa, Oh my gosh.

Hi, how are you, Bobby?

I'm good.

Oh my god, this is my first time calling in. I can't fucking believe it.

How are you?

I'm doing pretty good.

Uh.

This is like so real. I heard myself you saying like, hi Bobby, and like the other room where we're watching it.

What uh, what's going on with you, Bobby?

Oh my gosh, gek. Well I recently, well fairly recently got like my big girl job. I graduated college and everything. So I got my bigger job and everything, and so I have to, like the new people have to like work on weekends, which isn't like normal. And one of my coworkers is either like after we take our lunch break is either coming in extremely high or extremely drunk, and I am stuck on what the heck to do

Right?

That's what I was gonna ask, is to what degree does his intoxication do you believe affect his ability to perform his job or actually, more importantly, your ability to perform your job.

I mean I can he's my so our work has this stupid thing where they don't believe in like closed off cubicles. So the so like our office is entirely open, like there's no privacy whatsoever. We can hear everything like the person next to us does. And like it's meant so that like whenever a new person comes in they can easily like ask questions and shit like that. It's supposed to be like more welcoming, but it's kind of

And I'm kind of curee. So, like, is your supervisor not there? Like is there? Never? Is he never drunk when like somebody uh is around that would have a problem with that.

Yeah, so whenever our supervisor is pretty much never there on the weekends, so like he's not really going to ever get caught unless someone like brings it up pretty much. So that's like the other thing is like unless like he'll know if like I bring it up or someone else does, because there's only like a few of us that are ever there like in the office with him when he's doing this ship.

So you have a problem where you don't want to be a snitch, but you're like it's probably not good.

Honestly, Like it's such a boring fucking job that I would love to get drunk during it, like as soon as like whenever I have my hour lunch break.

Well, hey, now you know that you can do it and not get fired.

That's true. I know that, like none of us are snitches after.

This is that's one of that's Look, that's that is I mean, look, I'm not saying it's the correct to take away from this I'm not saying that there even is a correct takeaway from this, but it is a potential takeaway from this that you now have have seen proof that you can get fucking hammered, go into the bank and do your gig and nobody gives a shit kind of power. It's actually, I mean, this guy, he's actually kind of inspirational in that sense. If that's how you want to.

Look at it, I wish I could. It's just like I said, or like maybe like I didn't like emphasize it enough. It's just like the fact that he gets kind of confrontational while he is.

Does he get confrontational towards the customers or does he does he get confrontational towards you?

Towards us?

Yeah?

Tell me tell me specifically, what was the last confrontation that you had with him while he was drunk.

This was like whenever I I didn't really think that he was drunk because I couldn't fathom, like I've been working like retail jobs all my life up until like I graduated and got this job, so like I couldn't even like it didn't like cross my mind that people would actually get drunk like during like you know, like a professional job and shit like that.

Oh it's wait wait what what tell me? Tell me I'm brigetting like side true. What was the last confrontation you had with him? Specifically?

It was me like jokingly being like because he like stumbled a little bit over his feet, and I was like, okay, I'm clumsy, like I do that shit too. So I jokingly was like, oh my god, blank, are you drunk or something? And he was just like straight up to me like fuck you. Of course I'm not, like, but.

He's also openly denying it.

Yeah, but the entire time, like while he's saying that, he's like luring his words heavily, and I'm like, okay, yeah, sure, Well what you say.

Your name was Bobby. Bobby, listen, Bobby, take a day, do like you know, do like a shot. I mean what you said. You you said it's your dream to get drunk at work. You wish you could do what he does. Take a shot before word. No, take a shot before you go into the work. See how you feel. Don't actually do this. See how you feel, and then if you can, if you can handle that, you know, next time you take two, don't actually don't actually do this and then if you can handle that, take four

Have someone teach me how to like smoke weed every time I've tried, like I just well.

Thank you very much for calling Bobby the.

Point that like, I throw up so.

And I appreciate you sharing. You have a wonder for us to night.

Thank you, thank you. I appreciate it.

Grateful to be alive. Not everyone's alive. Most people are dead. How does it make me feel that most people are dead? I think it's good that most people are dead, not because they were bad people or anything like that. It's good. It's good that we all die because, look, you really want to do this forever. And I say that I love being alive. I really do. I love being alive. I'm excited that I get to continue to be alive for many more years. That sounds I'm a static. I'm

All right?

I'm okay, I'm I'm I'm uh chilling out in overtime.

What's what's new with you?

Uh?

Leonard? But you know, first of all, I got to say, did you hire you've hired a woman to answer calls now or something?

That's that's that's got one of the all right, that's doing an excellent job.

A new thing, yeah, a new thing. Also. I like the ominous music that you've been putting on as well.

I tried to change it to something less, but I don't know how to use the computer.

No, I like it. It's good, it's good.

Thank you. What's going on, Leonard?

Yeah, uh, not too much. Just working on a painting right now. Been listening throughout the night.

You had a specific thing that I that I saw that you wanted to talk.

About, right right?

Yeah? Recently, UH found out like pretty much, I broke up a marriage. Apparently this is some girl that apparently had children and a family and all that.

You know, Yeah, you broke up a marriage.

Yeah, yeah, this this girl she had a dating app And I don't really take any of that too seriously, right, And so I was just hanging out with one girl and her husband. Apparently he was following me for a while on my socials and I would bring it up to her, like who is this guy? Because I see a lot of photos of you guys together and everything. And one minute she's like, Oh, that's my coworker, that's

So wait a minute. So her husband, which you don't know that it's her husband at this point, is following you on social at the time, you didn't and he's following you on social media.

Yeah, yeah, I have like an our Instagram's Yeah he was following all that, and uh yeah, and where did he find them together?

Okay, but so I understand, So how did all right? So this this married woman is on dating apps looking to have an effect. She finds you, You guys start hanging out at why why is her husband? You'll see her instagram? You see her with a guy. Well, how does he start? How does he even find out about you and start following you? How does that make doesn't I have no idea?

He well, he must have been suspicious or maybe it happened before where he was just looking through her followers maybe or something. And uh yeah, he was kind of just following me and looking at my stuff apparently. And she always told me it was like her acts or a coworker or whatever. Right, So I was just kind of like whatever, you know, hm, because you know, I wasn't trying to get in a relationship or it didn't really mean much to me.

So so how did you you know? Okay, so there's sort of signs, there's suspicions, but you're brushing them off and and at what point does everything come to a head.

Yeah. So then one night, you know, I'm painting and I get a bunch of direct messages from this guy saying are you sleeping with this girl? And uh I was like yeah, you know sometimes, I mean I've done it in the past, not really recently, Like she slept with me and she comes over and uh yeah, like she would like buy me food, she would bring me over food, take me to like doctor's appointments and.

Ship like just taking you to doctor's appointments.

Well, I thought I had COVID. Yeah, well I had pink eye, and yeah I was hold on holding that I had no.

Idea on hold on, hold on, hold on. You're making absolutely no sense to me right now. Okay, you thought you had pink.

Ey, No, I did. From it. This other girl gave me a pink eye and she didn't tell me. A bunch of girls not telling me what's going on, all right, So hold on.

Here's what I don't understand is you say you're not looking for a relationship. You said you're you're basically like hooking up with this girl that you met on a dating app. But yet, yeah, you think you have pink guy. You think a very contagious disease, and so you call the girl you've been hooking up with ask her to drive you to the doctor.

Well, the pink I had was not contagious.

But you didn't know. No, I'm but Leonard, I'm speaking upon the knowledge you had at the time. You at the time have the knowledge you have pink eye. So you call this lady. I don't I don't even know. I don't even know if we have time to understand. Okay, well this is dynamic.

No, so listen, this girl, I already went to the doctors and had medicine and I was taking the medicine. All right. She comes over again after that and she's like, yeah, sure, I'll take you over there. And it wasn't contagious and that you knew.

At the time. All right, So you go to the Do you think you have pink eye? You go to the doctor. The doctor says, yeah, you do, but it's not the pages and You're like, great, I can keep working out with this lady.

I mean pretty much. She just always wanted to hang out with me, So I was like, you know, sure, I'm down to hang out.

I just needed to clarify that. Leonard, Leonard, you gotta meet me halfway on some of this.

H No, I get you, I feel you, Okay, So.

What happened and what is what? What sort of happens after that?

Pretty much? She was or she was like is she's sleeping with you? And I was like who are you? And he was like, I'm married to this girl. We have kids. She told me that she had a what do you call it?

Affair?

She was having people. She was having people rent out her apartment and they had kids, but those were actually her kids. So he was like, we have children, were married, blah blah blah. And I was like, well, this is news to me. I had no idea. I you know, she told me you were this and that blah blah blah. Right, And I was like, yeah, you know in the past, yeah, we've like slept together and everything. And he was so.

How did he he respond? Did he was he upset with you? Or did you explain that you did not know?

Yeah?

Yeah, I was just like, I had no idea. This is news to me.

Man.

I was like, I'm sorry you're having a go through this, you know, but uh but yeah, you know, we we have slept together in the past. I'm not really interested in all that anymore and whatnot.

And he was so, I mean, look to kind of to kind of wrap things up and get to where we are right now. Are you have you made contact with this woman ever? Again?

Uh?

No?

I told him to uh to pretty much like press her on this, and she she blocked so, which I mean I didn't want to talk to her anyways.

But so, how are you feeling about this because when we first picked up that, when I first started talking to you ten minutes ago, you seemed like you seemed like like you had some some guilt.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I feel well.

I mean I told him, I was like, man, I feel bad, like sorry, you have to go through this, you know. But yeah, you know, I don't know. I was lied to throughout the whole thing. If you don't know, you didn't know, but I do, you know, Yeah, but I don't know kind of I don't know how. That's what I wanted to call and talk to you, is like I don't know how to really like think about it, you know, because uh, well I.

Feel like that.

I mean I think, I mean, I mean, look, we'll I gotta move on.

But yeah, no, I feel you well no, well no.

I mean look, it sounds like you already have the right mentality about it, right, which is like, I mean, you were deceived. You know, you didn't act with any sort of intentional malice, So I don't think you guilty about it. I think, I mean, if anything, I mean, look, if anything, you're you know, you know, one of her little you know, you've been pawned, like you know, you you you were you.

Know, taking advantage of kind of, yeah.

I think you were, you were taking advantage of you know, we were lied to. Yeah, you know, so I wouldn't feel bad. I don't think And by the way, here's another thing, is like, you know, look, she just decided to use you, but if she was gonna cheat, she would have used you know, anyone else. So you know, I'm sorry to hear that you got swept up in this whole fucking thing, but I don't think you need to feel any guilt about it as long as you're telling the truth that you had.

No idea, you know, Yeah, well I didn't have any Like the whole relationship wasn't serious or whatever. It was just kind of you know, like.

Hang out and well whether you're the relationships whatever. But but but.

Yeah, it's a shitty feeling. So I just want to kind of you're, yeah.

I'm sorry to hear that you got caught.

Up a long night for you, and I don't think that you need to.

Feel I don't think you need to feel guilty about that.

For sure.

Is there anything else you want to say?

Uh?

Not to take life too seriously and uh, I don't really know, Uh, relationships aren't really. I don't really know if they're fit for our generation anymore.

If you want to go ahead and be a single guy and do whatever you're gonna do and do it until it no longer, well.

I know you're like that. The single life is definitely the life to live. But a lot of callers you have call in about like relationship advice, and uh, I think everyone should just everyone seems and everyone's really young when they're calling in to you about this kind of ship and you and me were the same age, and it's just kind of like, yo, don't take life too seriously.

That's what you tell them.

I mean, I've been listening to you, we've we've actually chatted in the past before about art and such.

But uh, yeah, but.

Be honest, thank you for calling and Sharon, and I'm sorry that that happened to you, and I'll talk to you again in another life.

Yeah, there's nothing to be sorry about. But uh, have a good night, man. You to get some good calls.

Yes, hello, Hey, hey, I heard that that was your name, Ryan, Ryan. I heard you have a test of some kind that you would like to share with the the listeners.

Yes, of course, So I actually have a. Basically, I believe that I love cars, I love driving, and my philosophy really is that people should be able to go as fast as they can handle and have proven they can handle handle.

Mm hmm. Okay, So it's a test or a philosophy.

It's there's a test related to it. So I think that there should be different levels of driver's licenses that you can earn based off of your skill aptitude on a test that you can take that measures certain things like your ability to drive, your reaction times, and things like that.

I'm really you know, I'm really trying to be open minded about the idea of having different ways. So you're telling me you want to enact the system in which you can get like a silver driver's license that will allow you to go X amount of miles over the speed limit CBS exactly, and and okay, so I'm curious, and maybe this is where the test aspect of this philosophy comes in. How does one prove themselves worthy of this higher echelon driver's license?

I think the best way that I've so far thought of, and this is this isn't something I've thought about extensively. It's just kind of an idea that popped in my head the other day, but I feel like it would be something like you take a few laps around the track and they like measure how you react to different things. And basically just do you know how you do this? Like when you drop a ruler, you can measure your reaction time.

I've never heard of that.

No, Oh, explain its. Basically, they hold the ruler between your fingers and then if you and then they drop it and you just have to try to catch it right when they drop it. I feel stupid, I'm doing the physical pinching. But yeah, so you try to catch it, and based off of where you catch it, you can measure how quickly your brain was able to react see it and then respond to the fact that it's dropping.

You know, I think you know this. It's an interesting theory. It's an interesting theory. My problem is, I mean, aside from how we're going to test people to see what color license they're going to get, is how do I mean what the basure is the problem. We have to share roads, right, we have to share roads. So the the yellow license pe well, are going to be sharing roads with the with the green license people, you know, and and and shit's gonna get fucked up.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I haven't thought of it that way. That makes sense, I guess. I mean I really do have a bias standpoint here, because I really.

Do have it because you would like to go very fast I get cars, So you're you're biased about that.

Yeah, my brains just romanticizing about this world where that's okay.

Uh, what's the fastest that you have gone on the highway?

The fastest I went on the highway was one hundred and forty two miles an hour.

One hundred and forty two miles an hour. Yeah, Jesus Christ, did you not you didn't get pulled over?

No?

I have been pulled over going ninety and eighty.

Dude, what do you even say? What do you even say if you get pulled over after going if if there someone clocks you at one hundred and forty two miles an hour, what do you even say? You just got to throw up your hair. You gotta be like, all right, is it? I'm going to jail?

Yeah?

Honestly, if you get pulled over going that fast, you're going to jail. I was lucky enough both times I got pulled over. If you're going over eighty, it's criminal. You can get pulled over and go to jail for going on anything over eighty.

Or and what is it if you go over one hundred and forty? Does it super criminal?

I don't know.

Yeah, it's it's yeah, you're you're screwed.

Well listen, Ryan, Oh, go ahead. The best thing to do, I want to hear it.

The best thing to do if you're getting clocks going one hundred and forty is just keep going because they can't chase you at that speats for long. They didn't get pursuit quickly.

Hmm. Interesting, you know that makes sense in theory. You got all these thoughts. See that makes sense in that makes sense in theory because if you go faster they cannot catch you. You've got all these thoughts, Ryan, that make a lot of sense in theory. And you know,

Precisely, precisely have a gress on that. Ryan, Yeah you too.

What car does the caller drive? I don't know. I don't know what fucking car can go one hundred and forty two miles an hour. I don't fuck with cars, man. I wish my ultimate dream is I want to live in a walkable city. I don't fuck around with cars because it's it's so easy to die. It's so easy to die, right, Like, like, all right, what imagine your stupid day where you're sitting in a chair for like ninety percent of it, you're on the computer, working or

It's like.

I'm just like, one guy's going as fast fifty miles an hour down this, and then there's another guy He's going to the same way, but there's there's lists little amount of fucking space between them or jousting out there. Hello Blair from Ohio?

Hello, what's up?

Blair from Ohio?

Oh? Nothing, nic?

How are you?

How am I? I am not doing too bad? How are you?

I'm pretty good? Is your toe doing better?

I appreciate you asking me that my toe is doing pretty better? I think.

That's good.

So what's going on with you? Blair?

Nothing? Really? I call takeet some advice about like relationships.

I guess I'll do my best. What's what's going on with you?

I know, Well, is there like a missus Gecko?

Is there a missus Gecko? Probably out there somewhere. There's all kinds of people with all kinds of names. But what's going on in your life?

Okay? Have you ever seen that movie good Luck Chuck?

Good Luck Chuck. I've heard of it. I'm familiar.

Okay, So basically, like this guy, you know, women go to him and they get with him and then they find like they're forever like saying afterwards, I feel like that's kind of my life right now.

Good Luck. So in Good Luck Chuck, women get with Chuck and then they just fall in love with him forever.

No, they get like, like, so the next boyfriend that they get, that's like who they get married to.

Oh so Chuck is the penultimate lover eternally.

Yes.

Yeah, that's his and that's his and that's is that an issue for him?

No? But for me yeah, I'm kind of over it.

Oh okay, so you are the perpetual penultimate lover before the guy finds whoever he actually ends up being with.

Yeah. So, like the last three people I've talked to, I've been single for like three years now. So like the last three people I kind of got serious with have ghosted me, stopped talking to me, and then like a week later they have another girlfriend. And it's like the weirdest thing.

I don't know, mmm, interesting, interesting, I.

No, go ahead, please sorry, I'm actually kind of I think I'm talking to someone right now. I don't know if I'm being like Homie zone though. It's kind of weird. He's a weird relationship.

That we have.

Why tell me more about this relationship? Why do you think it is? It is weird?

Uh?

He just kind of like tells me about dates he goes on and like how bad they are. But we talked all the time, like it's kind of cute, Like he'll have me like who want to talk to me on his way home from work? Or like we'll talk on the phone before bed and stuff. We've hung out a few times. We actually went on a date last Friday and it was good. I kind of fucked it up though by being late. I didn't mean to. I just scrambled for like a babysitter last minute, So we

I do, Yes, so be honest with me. Has that been like a a any any amount of impediment in your dating life.

There's been some people that are like, I don't know. I try to keep my home life away from my dating life because my son has a dad and he sees him, so it's it's no issue. I'm not looking for someone for my son, you know, it's for me.

Mm hmmmm. Interesting okay, Uh, it's.

It is weird because there's a lot of people in my age that are like, oh, you have a five year old and I'm like, yeah, I don't know. I'm sorry.

Sure, well, I mean look, regardless of what other people your age think about, you know, your life, Like, well, how do you meet these these guys? You said, there's all these guys who go on like they like they go on a few dates with you and then they find someone else. Do when you go on a date with first of all, we are you meeting these guys? It's like this is this is a tender thing, a hinge thing.

Uh tender and hinge?

Yeah?

Okay, And do they do they know off the bat that you have a child?

Yeah? I actually put in my profiles then I'm a mom.

Okay, yeah, I think that's I think that's good. Not you know, not not because anyone has any right to anyone else business. But you know, at the end of the day, it makes things easier for you, right because you don't want to waste any time, you know with anyone who you don't.

Know is already that.

Yeah, you don't know.

Interesting. So so all right, it's talking more about this guy who you're talking to right now, because it sounds like things are going good with that guy.

I think so, but like, I don't know, he might be watching the stream, so I'm trying to watch what I say.

Did he did you? Did you show him the stream?

No?

Oh.

He tried to call me when I was in the queue, and I was like, no, I'm not trying to be rude, Okay, I've been like I've been super hype about getting on your show for a minute. So like he's always we're always talking about it, like oh, He's like, get in there, you got.

It, And so you're always talking about it because you're like, you're like, I really want to call this geckos to talk about you.

I have told him. I was like, when I if I ever get in I'm talking ship and he said he would do the same.

Yeah, is he Is he on the fucking queue? That's conference with motherfucker in Dude.

I don't I don't know if he's on the cue. Do you want me to like, I don't know how to do that. I don't know if he's calling.

No, Well listen, Okay, So you're in this you're in this thing where you feel like guys, are you feel like you're the you're the you're the you know, always whatever being passed over or whatever. But I mean, I don't know, I feel like, uh, the the remedy to that, if there is one, is like patience, right, and sounds like you've been pretty patient, and I don't know, it sounds like these things are working out with this guy.

Yeah, yeah, I do think I need to, Like I just get really excited. So it's like like my loveling guage is like buying stuff and like giving presents and like showing it, you know, like, oh, I like you, here's this, I got this for you. So it's like I was like, oh my god, I've been trying so hard not to buy a bunch of gifts and be like, hey, how's it going? Like, but I don't want to like scare them away, Like I haven't done that before, but

You know, you're kind of my My general thought process on like dating is that like you shouldn't ever not for And this is not I'm not saying. This is not like a cheesy thing. I'm saying, this is like a logic. Okay, this is not a motivational speech. You shouldn't compromise logically. You should not compromise who you are while you are dating because you got to find someone

He's in the queue.

But he's in the que name.

His name's Kane.

There. There ain't no Cain in this uh in this queue right here.

I don't know his twitch thing is like clutching the scrub.

He's in the chat, not the cue conference. Confidence, sa, man, if you want, if you want, you don't have to you know, I don't know what we're going to talk about, but we can try it.

Oh, no, to keep suck to me.

Listen, listen. What's your name again? Did he you didn't confor You're not? What's your Are you there?

Yeah? What's up?

Oh? It's both of you guys. Hey, what's that man? What's your name? My name is Kane Kin Yeah, like Kane and Able from the Bible.

Yeah, we get that a lot.

How's your life going, Kane?

It's good man, dude, you know, getting through.

The getting through the West. Are you watching TV right now?

No, I'm not.

When are you guys watching TV?

It is not me?

It was me?

Sorry?

Oh no, Worri Wait, so how long have you guys been hanging out with each other?

It was me?

Wait?

What would you say, like a couple of weeks?

Yeah, like a month?

Yeah?

Yeah, Well listen, it's been about a month. And where'd you guys meet? Hinge? Tinder?

It was, well, we started talking on Hinge, but we met. I was like fourteen when we first met.

Oh really, so this is one of those like, uh, you met, you first meet and whatever, middle school, and then all of a sudden you're on Hinge and you're like, I saw I remember that guy from whatever math class, and now you're you're hanging out kah pretty much?

Yeah, now I think I was sixteen, she was fourteen pretty much. We were both just like school together.

That school was it as is it was? It was it nice to reconnect.

Yeah, yeah, we vibe is pretty good. Yeah, it was cool.

Beautiful Cane, Cane, do you even know what what this is that we're Do you even know about what this is?

Uh? Kind of yeah. I I caught a couple of your streams on Reddit? Did you start streaming on credit before you? With the twitch?

Everywhere? I'm on my Space, I'm on fucking born Hub name it, I'm there bank Bang. You never been to spank bang dot com? No, I haven't check it out.

Chat is blowing up right now. It's so. Yeah, we met when we were when we were under age, we were both minors, and then in the future where I'm twenty six now she's what twenty four? Yeah, so everybuddy's like, whoa wait.

A minute, And how do you feel as though you have matured, developed slat or even stayed the same since since you since you first rendezvous a decade prior. Oh?

I mean, man, I don't even know how to answer that. Honestly, it's yeah, I feel like I've I've definitely grown up.

You're definitely grown up.

Yeah, I mean I would say I definitely a lot, matured a bit, pretty much got my life going. I don't know, what do you What.

Do you look for in a partner, Kane?

Uh, somebody that somebody that gets seen, somebody that I can vibe with that I don't know. I don't know, really, I.

Think that's a sufficient answer. Somebody that vibes with you, somebody that gets you. Sufficient answer. I would say, that's that's pretty common amongst, uh, amongst most people. Yeah, well, listen, Cain and what's your name again?

Blair?

Blair Caine and Blair Listen. You could die at any second, so live in the moment and enjoy uh the time that you've got where you're a young person that can talk to people and do things and hold hands and all that crazy crap. You know, enjoy it well you can, because one day you'll be old and alone and all your friends will be dead, or you'll be dead. That's really that's the two options.

So you know, chill, enjoy, enjoy your life.

Enjoy life, appreciate you, get go. Someone said, ghak is going to a dark place? Why is? I don't know, know, you know what. Here's the thing, whether or not I believe in love. I think I believe in love in a general sense. But is love but I don't I don't know if I don't know if love is for everyone. I don't know if love is for everyone. I don't know if it's for me. Dude, class sick line. I thought, and look, I thought love was only true in fairy tales for somebody else, but not for me. You know

Literally goes on the line taking your phone calls every night.

Teaching life expert