“MY EX IS PREGNANT”

Yo, Hello, what's up? Is this?

Lyle?

Yeah? Who's this?

Uh?

This is Holdy up?

Man?

This is holding Holy holy h o l d u y h oh oh Holdy, what's up? Holdy? What's up?

Man?

Uh? Now it's hold Holdy is a fake name if I don't really care. Holdly what's going on with you? How's life?

It's pretty good, man, I was not expecting.

You to call. Well watching the streamer.

How's your night going?

Man?

It's going all right? But hey, who gives a fuck about me? Holdy? What's going on? How can I get you today?

Oh?

Yeah, dude, I think I I think I texted you earlier about my issue.

That I got going on.

So I mean you can talk about that, I guess.

Yeah, yeah, sure, let's do that. Tell me the issue.

Yeah, So, basically, back in January, I figured out that my girlfriend at the time, long story short, we just had a baby and it was his birthday coming up, and right around that time, I started figuring out that she was cheating on me, and come to find out, I figure everything.

Out the night before his birthday party.

And yeah, so I figured out she cheated on me, and then we broke up and then yeah, so like a month later, she says that she's pregnant, and I'm.

Like, okay, well it's got to be got to be the guy that she cheated on me with, you know.

And I was like, like I was, I was even doubting that she was even pregnant, you know what I mean.

So I don't know.

And then yeah, we did a DNA test and yeah, basically.

We're waiting the results right now.

So it's kind of a crazy situation, I guess.

All right, so you you and this woman have a kid together, and you found out she was cheating on you a year after the kid was born, and then you found out she was pregnant with another kid, and now you're wondering if this second kid is yours or the guy.

Yeah.

Man, it's like a tough situation. And the crazier part about it is, in the time that me and her broke up, I actually met this other girl, and like she kind of hit me with the news that she was pregnant while I've been with this other girl. So that's kind of complicated already.

Are you. I was literally about to say, please don't tell me you got this girl pregnant too.

No, no, no, no, no, no, this girl, this girl is not pregnant.

So oh oh, okay, all right, Okay, you confused me there for a second because I thought I thought you broke up with this girl that was cheating on you, and then you started dating a new girl, and now that girl is pregnant.

No, no, no, that I was.

Okay. You can only handle so many pregnancies.

At once, right, right, right, I wouldn't want to take on more than one.

All right, So all right, so you're dating a new girl now after this you found out the other one was cheating on you. Correct, correct, Okay, and now you're wondering if this kid who your ex wife.

Girlfriends girlfriend, yeah, girlfriend.

All right, And now you're wondering if this this kid who your ex girlfriend has is your kid or not?

Right?

Yeah, it's like you, when do you when do you get the results of the DNA test?

Uh?

Should be soon, Like I'm not exactly sure when, but it should be within the next couple of months. Like it's like this whole process, like because she's not even I don't even know she's far that far along yet, Like I don't even know. It's like this whole thing, so I don't even know.

Man, mm hm m hmm, Well I have I have two questions. What are you going to do? What are you gonna what are you going to do if it is your kid? And what are you going to do if it's not?

Uh well, obviously, if it is my kid, I'm gonna I'm gonna take care of her like my our other kid we have, but it's just going to be a complicated situation between me and Herk's like she's cheated on me and everything. But then if it's not my kid, dude, I don't even know, Like that's like that's the part where I'm like, I don't even know how to handle the whole the whole situation.

Well, I mean, if it's not your kid, then.

I mean I guess let's move on, right.

Yeah, yeah, I mean you already I mean, look, you already share custody of one with the Do you guys have like a whole like agreement? Did you did? Was it? Was it an issue when you broke up with this girl? Was an issue fighting for custody? Ah?

So yeah, that's we haven't even had any issues with with that at all, Like we didn't go to court or anything like that because we were just like dating basically for the whole time we were together and we had the kid, and yeah, I mean we see him like three four days a week something like that. So man, not too bad. But yeah, I don't know, it's just the whole situation, I guess is just like I didn't even see it coming obviously, but it's just crazy to me.

I mean, how do you feel about the whole thing, because that's rough, But I mean just from talking to you and you're hearing your tone of voice, you seem like you're and I'm not not over it, but like you know, handling it well, yeah, I.

Mean, like I said, the whole thing, the whole breakoup situation happened back in January. Then I didn't figure out she was pregnant for like a few months later.

So yeah, I mean it's like.

She's supposed to have the baby soon. I'm not exactly sure the the exact due date and everything, but yeah, within that time, I'm supposed to figure out if it's mine or not. And that's the stressful part.

Was it. It was it tough when you first became a father because you're young. It says here that you're twenty four.

Yeah, man, Yeah, I had him at a twenty two or twenty three, twenty two, twenty two because it's about to be hard. Uh yeah, I mean we had an apartment at the time, and then right before he was born, we kind of moved out, moved back into my mom's house. We're saving up, we were saving up money to move into a house, and then, yeah, she cheated on me. So I'm kind of stuck at my mom's house right now because Alison Market's pretty like pretty bad. Also, so that's another thing.

You guys didn't combine your finances, did you.

Luckily no, because we weren't married, so I kind of kept that that separate. Good good, Yeah, having a joint account and dealing with all that.

So mm hmmm.

Mm hmm.

How is that.

How are things going with the new girl?

Uh yeah, I don't know.

It's it's like, uh, I feel like I feel like we're we're we have a good relationship, but it's nothing like serious, you know what I mean, Because she knows about my.

Kid right now, and then she found out that I could potentially be having another kid, so it kind of complicated the the whole relationship. So that's another thing that I'm kind of dealing with so I don't even know if this relationship itself is gonna last, but I'm hoping for the best.

Bro, what's up with you? You're like, You're like, look, here's the thing. If I were you, if I were in your situation, I mean I would be I wouldn't be able to handle it. I would crack. And you're over here you seem, you know, like you're full of sunshine. What's up? How are you?

So?

What's going to? What's what chemicals are in your brain right now? Well?

I'll be honest, I have been smoking a little tonight, but I usually just keep a positive mind about everything, like as much as I can.

But I don't know.

I I also have, like, you know, bad days, just like everybody else.

But sure, I don't know.

I feel like I feel like even just talking to you about it just kind of, I don't know, brought out the the I don't know the good vibes of the whole situation, because you can think of it in a bad way in a good way. I'll so, I don't know, I'll try to find a good in everything.

How do you? How do you? How do you stay positive?

Just in general, a lot of weed, I'll say that.

But also, just like in any situation, I would say, just trying to find the good in it no matter what, because when it comes down to it, if you get mad at the little things, it's just gonna irritate you and take up your time When you could have just focused on the good things about a bad situation and moved on from it, you know what I mean, You just stay on the bad things.

It stays in your head and it's just toxic.

So I try to keep try to keep a level head and I think positive.

I guess.

Mm hmmm, hm hmm. What tell me about your life outside of this? If you have a second what do you have a job? Do you have hobbies? What do you what do you do when you're not in an episode of Jerry Springer?

Yeah, man, I I deliver for Amazon right now, and I actually listen to a lot of you while I'm fucking delivering. But yeah, I mean hobbies. I go to a lot of concerts. Uh, I don't know.

I go thirsting a lot of fun.

Do you your kid do anything together? Do you guys? Do you take a stroller through the park or anything like that? Oh?

Yeah, I live, Uh, I live kind of in the woods, so.

Like we'd be doing nature walks here and there, and.

I take him to like the river and stuff and just like parks and whatnot. It's pretty fun. But yeah, I take him to the mall sometimes too. He just learned to walk, so he's been walking around little stores and stuff.

You know, how was it? How was it like that first year with your ex? Like is it is it? Is it harder now that you're sort of like doing it on your own?

So yeah, I mean, I I do live with Like I said, I live with my mom, so I do have a little bit of help from her. But I will say, yeah, it definitely was a big change because before we're kind of both like you know, co parenting, like like you're supposed to. But I don't know now like whenever I just have him just me, Like I had to learn like a lot of different things that like I didn't do before that she did, you know what I mean.

It's just like I feel like I've I've started to.

Get the hang of it, but because he's so young, but like, yeah, man, it definitely was a challenge because like I said, I live with my parents and I'm pretty young, and I'm saving up to get a house and everything too, So it's just all around a big struggle. But I'm trying. I'm trying.

Mm hmm. What's your dream in life?

Stream and life?

I've ever been asked that, but I guess I guess just to like own a business and be like financially free and just be able to buy whatever I want and not worry about money and.

Just live live free.

I guess that's a dream.

What kind of you? I don't want to run.

Something that I enjoy doing, but that's the problem that I don't know.

What it would be exactly.

Like your job is pretty cool. I wish I could do something like that, but I don't know. I guess I just got to find what I want to do because I don't.

I don't obviously don't.

Want to deliver for Amazon forever.

Well, I gotta tell I gotta tell you so, and I it's it's funny you say that my job is cool, because you know, I've I have been struggling a lot these past week with you know, I just kind of struggling in general with like trying to be happy where I'm at. You know, it always feels like something's missing or or needs to be put in place first for

The best advice that I've heard.

Is just to not have any expectations for the future, but to like set goals for what you want to happen. But if you set yourself up for expectations, you're just gonna be, you know, let down whenever you fail at anything. So it's just best to keep a level ahead about everything. And not be let down by what happens in the end, but the set of goals to something positive though, you know.

I was gonna say, you should take this whole thing to Jerry Springer, but he's dead.

Yeah, man, I fucking hate that shit.

Dude actually used to watch him a lot, which is ironic.

What is is it? I've never even seen this or I don't even if I if I had to in my head picture what this guy looks like, I would have no idea. But what is it? Maury? Is that where the whole?

Where?

Where's the whole? You are not the father thing? Is that? Is that Spring? Or is that May?

The thing is Murray or Maury Mark? I don't know, but I feel like it is Jerry Springer, to be honest, that sounds like it is.

What's the what's the What's what's the what's the twenty twenty three version of Springer.

It's got to be something on YouTube, yeah, because they have that whole uh, that Chris Hansen guy. But he's like Stet Hansen. You know, I'm talking about who kind of took over, you know, Skeate Hanson is.

I know, I know, well, I know who I know who Chris Hansen is. Who's you said, Skeet Hansen.

Yeah, this, uh, it's like taking over. Chris Hansen's like whole persona. But he like does the same thing. I mean, I'm pretty sure it's legit, but he like meets these dudes in Walmart. I think they're meeting like twelve year old girls and and bust them. It's pretty crazy. But he's like, it's on this whole like persona.

It's hilarious.

I'm trying to think, well, whatever you can just I don't know, you can just do the boring thing and find out whether or not you're the father, you know, in an email alone.

Yeah, man, probably going to be either an email or a text message or some sort I wish I could go on Jerry's Springer.

Again.

HOLDI, holdly, holdly, is there anything else you want to talk about or say to the people before we go?

Uh?

Just thankful to be on your stream now and listening for for a minute and uh always get a good laugh that works and whatnot. So I should appreciate you streaming, man. That's all I gotta say.

Thanks Man, I gotta talking to you made me realize that I either need to look on the bright side of things more or just get high more often.

A little bit of both.

Bro telling you take care of you.

Too, man, good night.

I really need we we should put an ad for weed after this? Uh do they make there's really are you allowed to advertise weed? I've never I don't think I've ever seen I mean, I've seenthing billboards, but I don't think I've ever heard a podcast ad about weed. There's like Delta nine and shit or maybe like weed maps. We need a weed sponsor. How do we get a weed sponsor? Sir? Maybe I should make my own strain. Does anyone know how I can make and distribute my

Hey?

Oh my god, it's so nice talking to you again. I talked to you about two years ago.

Oh, we talked two years ago. What did we talk about?

So?

I had I was about to go into eating disorder rehab and I we were talking about how the meaning of life and life after death and how we have Well, I think you agreed with me that sometimes when people past, it's like they're walking into the next room, and how we're all connected. I think that's our conversation pretty much.

Oh man, I say, it sounds that sounds like the era of my life where I wore a ponytail.

Wait, what hairstyle do you have under the hat?

Oh? Only uh, only my family knows that. No, I don't know. I look, I look, I look like any I have a I have a regular boring white gye haircut.

Okay, okay, that sounds nice.

How are you doing? I'm I'm how are you? How are you doing? Since then? How was how was rehab?

It was interesting? Unfortunately, the mental health uh system here in Georgia is not that good. I also interesting stories for my time in there, but Luckily, I've been in remission for two years now.

So oh cool, cool, I'm.

Not dealing with that anymore.

Yeah, are you general? Are you feeling? Was it worth it to go?

Definitely? I think it's very important to ask for help when you need it, and luckily I had insurance because it was very expensive. Yeah, but I'm very grateful I went. It was interesting, you know, being somewhere where everyone around you is going through the exact same thing, maybe different, you know, everybody has different stories, but it's nice to be able to look around and know that you're not an outlier, you know, like everybody's kind of in the same boat.

I was thinking about this recently. You know, how do you think there wouldever would you ever trust an AI doctor, Like, let's say that there was like a free, open source like AI surgeon that you could go to for free to get free brain surgery. Would you do something like that.

I don't know about surgery, but it's funny that you say that, because the other day my therapist canceled on me and I went to characterai dot com and talked to a therapist and the advice actually helped.

Dude, So I've done that before. I've used I've used chat GPT as a therapist, which is a It's a little weird because the whole point of therapy is that it's supposed to be completely confidential, and this is like you're feeding your you know, deepest, darkest life things into an algorithm that processes it and spits it out to you know, millions of other people. But I mean, I think that's I don't know how anything works. I'm stupid, But I've used it too. It's really good, dude. It's

Yeah, it actually really helped. I was asking it about how to feel better after a friendship ending, right, and the advice was generally what other people were giving me too, which is the whole point of an AI, right, it tells you what other people have.

Said before.

But it was it was nice, weirdly comforting, and then once I was done, I felt like a weird mix of emotions like wow, this was very human, Like I don't know how to feel about this, but I think it might be a good option for people who can't afford therapy or don't really have friends to talk to. Maybe not for like genuine advice, but for like a little you know, like a rough patch I need a quick pick me up.

Mm hmmmmmm. Yeah, I've totally done the same thing. I've used it when a therapist is canceled on me or something like that. Yeah, I don't know. I don't know, like if I have, I'm sort of agnostic to it. Of like is it good to have to like be replace friendship with the computer.

I don't think is a good idea, but definitely supplementing. So if you're at a point where you have literally zero people to talk to, it doesn't hurt to get some sort It's just like, you know, I tend to look things up, like up things that I'm going through, whether it be like on what is it?

Quorra or.

Just Google to see what people have to say. It's the same, you know, just more personalized. Uh, And you don't have to scroll through bunch of blogs and read it. You just get it instantly, which I find it's kind of nice. Definitely not replacing friends. Human connections are important, but in a tough moment, it's kind of the same as contacting you know, like I used to contact the crisis text line right, and I was getting the exact

It was kind of scary, isn't that?

Isn't that weird?

That?

Like, could you imagine a crazy future where you call like a suicide hotline or a crisis hotline and you can tell that it's like an AI voice answering everything.

I feel like that would that would definitely send me over the edge.

I was thinking. I was thinking that would either make me do it or just it would be so funny to me that I'd be like, all right, maybe life's working.

Yeah, it would it would snap me out of it.

Yeah, I like what you said. I like what you said about You're You're totally right. It's very It is very similar to like typing your issue into Reddit and seeing if anyone had the same thing or korra, except although it's weird, right because when you look at the reddit or the Korra answer, it's like that's one person, but the answer that uh chat GBT or something like

Yeah, and I've contacted the crisis line too many times and I realized that they go off of not a script, but kind of like talking points, and that's basically what the AI does too. You know, they can't really be too personal or put in much emotion when they're giving you advice. It's more like a like a quick calm down, let's do some coping skills, right So the exact same thing. You know, what coping skills can you use?

Right now?

That's the same answer I would have gotten from the suicide hotline. It's not like I have their like genuinely listening and putting in their input or opinion. They're just trying to get me to calm down based off with their training. And if the AI has the same training, then they're essentially doing the same thing.

Mm hmmm mm hmmm.

Mm hmm.

Yeah, it's a it's an interesting thing to think about. Hmmm. Do you you use AI for anything else?

Unfortunately, yes, so I don't use AI to do my paperwork if I have to write something, but I use it to revise it. So I'll write out some papers and then I'll go in and be like, hey, can you make the song more professional? Kind of like grammarly, But yeah, I get to change the tones and I don't have to pay for it like Grammarly, So I use that sometimes. And when I first found Character AI, I did talk to Aaron from Attack on Titan.

Oh wait, like you could, like you made like there was an AI that I saw Attack on Titan a long time ago. But Aaron's a character and Attack on Titan.

Right, Yeah, he's the main character, and there was a.

Robot that was trained to look like to talk like him, and you had a conversation with it.

Yeah.

Character AI is a website and they are kind of like user based, so people can go there and create an AI based off of a character or like a therapist. I've talked to elon Musk, not really, but on there. Yeah, so it's kind of funny sometimes, you know.

My thing with that is that like like if I if there was a robot that was trained to speak exactly like Obama. Yeah, and I was talking to it, it wouldn't be believable because the real Obama, if I were trying to talk to him, he would be using every chance he can to get out of the conversation because he has about a thousand things better to do than talk to me, you know what I'm saying. So, like if I were really talking to Obama, like I would say, hey, Obama, how you doing? And he would

Yeah, it's not really That's what I mean. It's not really personal. It's very you know, robotics kind of what an idea like. I think it's it's best used for if you're trying to write a story. Yeah, yeah, I see a lot of people use it for like fan fiction, you know, because it creates good dialogue, you know, if you're like a creative Brett, you can go in there

I like what you said. It may you know, I don't know. This is why I'm agnostic towards it, because like, like I mean, humans have been using technology to solve their problems forever, but it's like, what about our personal problems?

It reminds me of the movie Her. I'm not sure if you know that movie.

Yeah, I do. It's funny that came out, like I mean, that was what twenty seventeen or something like that, that was way before all this stuff went went went to that went crazy.

Yeah, and in the movie he was pretty happy, you know, for a while, until you know the ending happened. But like you said, if you're happy, you're happy. I don't like to put my opinion on people's lives what they choose to do. But sometimes if you have someone who's really mentally struggling and seeking connections, I think it's best to use AI to find resources to find other people, right, like, hey, chat GPT, what community gatherings are in my area?

Yeah?

Or yeah?

Yeah, I like that, you know, like how do I make friends or how do I increase my confidence? You know, because sometimes like.

A coach instead of a instead.

Of a stend.

Yeah, you know, but it's like you really need it. Like I said, my therapist canceled on me. I really needed advice in that moment. It's definitely a good supplement. I mean, you know, it's kind of like I don't know, it really is a supplement, But I personally, in my own life will not be using it regularly.

I want to ask you this before we go. I have only I've called the crisis line once and the person was was actually really really nice. But I've heard a lot of stories of people doing it and like

Yeah.

So there's a couple hot lines. This National Suicide hot Line, there's like hotlines per state. I used to call the Georgia Crisis Line, and they have a text line. I prefer to text because of what you said. Sometimes people can be kind of impatient on the phone and give don't really give you advice. They just try to see whether they have to call the cop or not. And I've had really sweet people and also people who you can tell they're just reading something and not really paying attention.

Yeah yeah, yeah, I know. I see I see that too. I see that too. You're like, because all it, dude, all it takes is like because you're in your own because when you're freaking out, I mean, you're like alone in your own and this is for me, You're like alone in your own head. You have no outside feedback. And the second like a little a little there's a little little crack and you're damn. And there's another person

Yeah, that's usually I would text because halfway through I'm okay, now I don't have to awkwardly yeah, I don't have to awkwardly end the conversation. I to stop texting back, you know. But I've had that happen before. I've got into the hospital and I'm like, okay, can I go home now? But I still have to do the whole intake.

What's your name again?

I mean's Opal?

Opal? Well? Opal? Two years from now, what's going to happen is you're going to call back and I'm just gonna have an AI get bot running the lines.

I don't know, I really appreciate like you, you know, I don't think it would be the same. Your energy is very nice. I really appreciate you being behind the mic.

Well, thanks SOPL, but we'll see if I could get it to be really good. If I could, like, because I bet I could just talk to it. I could rant. I could rant into a microphone for twenty hours and then it could probably reproduce something.

Would you be able to program your silences? You know, after someone says something kind of crazy, you just kind of go quiet. You think you could program that or would it just talk back immediately?

If anyone knows how to make an AI all right, so there's all these people out there who know how to make an AI talk, right. If anyone out there knows how to make an AI not talk, send me an email.

All right something.

Thank you very much. Ope, I appreciate you coming on and talking so I'm very stoked. Thanks for continuing to listen to this thing for two years. I appreciate I'm glad that you didn't haven't gotten sick of it yet. Is there anything else you want to say to the people of the computer before we go, No, just to you.

I appreciate all you do. You know, you've inspired me to go out and talk to people more and listen to their stories, and it's helped me make a lot of really cool connections. So thank you for being you man. Keep doing it.

Fuck yeah, thank you, Opel. Congrats on the rehabilitation. You sound like you're doing better at least from talking to you for these past ten twenty minutes, and I appreciate you, and I'll talk to you soon.

All right, I'll see you.

In two years.

Bye, ople Bye, I am gekbots. Hey guys, it's Lyle here. I'm about to do some ad reads, but if if you're a premium member of the podcast, you will not hear them. Premium members, or gek Legends, as I like to call them, get access to every episode of this podcast ad free. They also get bonus episodes, recordings for my live shows, members only streams, and they support my ability to keep doing this show for a long time, do it in cooler, more interesting places, and also eat food,

All from Kyle Yo.

Hi, what's your name?

Hey, my name's Kyle Man.

Kyle, what's going on?

Not much. I just got home. I've been trying to get in touch with you for a while now. Man, I've tried on and off for almost a couple of years. I just had luck getting on. But we're here now, and it's great to talk to you.

Man. Yeah, Man, good to talk to you too. I have I have to know, over these couple of years you've been trying to reach me, is there anything in particular you've been trying to reach me about.

I mean, I kind of just wanted to like talk about life and shit, like, uh so, my whole thing is, like I'm a I'm a saxophone player, and like I drive around the Midwest a lot, and I do like a lot of gigs, and I'm trying to sort of like be entrepreneurial and like, you know, I'm making an album next week and all this stuff and cool, you know.

Mmm mmmm what aspect of our lives? Is there a particular aspect of our lives you you wanted to to compare or contrast about, like, is there I guess a thing with that that you're thinking about.

Well, you know, I hear all your crazy stories of being on the road and meeting you know, different people, you know, and I do that as well, but just definitely on a smaller scale since that, you know, my

You ever get into any like eyes wide shut shit where you're playing saxophone with a blind fold while people are fucking around you.

No, but I've I've been playing on the dance floor once and there's this there's this woman who's like she started trying to dance on me while I'm playing, and you know, like I'm in like work mode, you know, like everyone's like drunk and all this stuff, and I'm like, I'm just kind of like man like, I'm just trying to play get away from me? Was she like on you trying to? But you know, I have a that a piece of metal in front of me, So I'm like, what are you doing?

Hmmm? Do you like your life? Are you happy? Or are you excited? Or you do you feel good? Do you is your body temperature at a normal place? A?

Yeah, M I have you know, I have streaks, you know, I get I have when when the phone's ringing and like, you know, things are happening, you know, I feel content. You know. I think my biggest issue is that I

Yeah, let's compare and contrast on that. I was thinking about that. I've been thinking about that with myself a lot, you know, because you know, my gecko career has has had its peaks and valleys, and there's been times where, like I'm on Instagram after I just posted something being like, you know, it's just going to get as many likes as it used to, and you know, you're tracking shit like that, and it's such a you know, when I look at it from an objective point of view, it

Yeah, absolutely, man, It's it's a vicious cycle for sure. You know. It's like, you know, I feel like, you know, we're programmed like that in this day and age. I mean, especially you mentioned with the whole Instagram thing. Man. You know, I feel like my you know, I'm trying to get my feet off the ground and like, you know, draw some awareness. And you know, whenever I post something like maybe a good example of it is like, you know, I post videos of me playing, you know, semi regularly.

Yeah, yeah, no, I get like that all the time.

Yeah, yeah, you know.

But and then on the other side of that, you know, I had, you know, I made one video, Oh god, maybe in March and it got like the most likes I ever got and for me that was like I think three hundred and fifty likes, and I was like, oh my god, it's so I'm so cool, like and it was like a video of me playing like somebody else's solo, you know. I was just like it was something I was practicing, you know. And I'm I'm like, man, like, why are you getting hype over a video of you

Right, that's no what you just what you just said, I want the attention to be on my own creative creations. It's like that's that's what's where you want to be. Where you want to be, I think is like just be is like you want to just be about the fucking work of what you're doing. That's the most That's what happens you can be is you, you know, me in the bliss of having this conversation with you right now,

But you know, you know, I think going along with that point, one of the beautiful things about what you know, a good comparison moment about what you and meble do is we're fortunate to work on the lighter side of society, you know what I mean. We're not like you know, we're not out there like fighting wars or like you know,

You know, I don't aligne I don't align with you on that. I'm sorry that well because only because you know I'm I'm happy with what I do, and I haven't got I don't think I've gotten to the place where I can sit with myself and and and really say and understand and take in like I help people, you know, because I I because I have a lot

But you No, No, I totally agree. Yeah, And I could have worded that better. Uh No, that that totally makes sense.

Man.

You know, it's just kind of like finding your finding your sort of pocket, your you know, I don't want to say finding your place because that almost sounds like

What?

Uh?

Oh god? You know what as funny is? By the way, thank you for all those Thank you for all those kind words. Thank you for all that kind sucking I have. I have coummed everywhere I I you know what it is funny is I'll like, I'll see people quote me, like on Discord or on Twitter or something, and I always look at the quotes and I'm like, fuck, did I say that?

You know, well, you know kind of get into that flow state, and you know you're just like exactly literally.

Okay, okay, you know to take it back the the bro it's the it's the flow state. I'm sure you're familiar with the flow stead. I'm sure you get into it a lot when you're playing the saxophone. It's like, you know, forget about the likes on Instagram and the you know, worrying about money or any of these other things. It's like it's like the fucking flow state that that's what you know, that's what feels so fucking good afterwards, because that's something that nobody can can take away from you.

I've never watched Soul, but you've never watched dude.

Fuck you, you've never watched Soul. You're a saxophone player something.

I know. Man, the saxophone player on it is a badass. TiO Fuller. Uh, she did like the saxophone playing for the movie, and the character is loosely based on her, So shout out Tea Fuller. She's a badass.

How do you know the person that the cartoon character and Soul is based off of? But you've never seen the movie.

That's the thing that sucks about, you know, kind of like being so like I guess so deep in like the intricacies of the industry is that like sometimes you don't you forget to zoom out enough to like see the big picture, you know, you know, after Like I think a good example of that is, like, you know, having this like I've studied so much music that like going back and trying to listen and listen to it for leisure has gotten harder over the years.

Yeah, yeah, do you do you still do you still like what you're doing?

Oh?

I love it, man, I wouldn't have it any other way. And uh yeah, I'm very grateful to like be doing this. You know, it's hard, you know, like I said, like this this weekend was really hard on me, and you know how it so. And I'm also doing my doctorate right now in jazz. So it's just like, you know, I go to school on the weekdays and then I'm like just traveling a little traveling on the weekends. You know. I I feel like I'm conflating myself a little bit.

M hm, you know is it? By the way? You know, see, I wish you watched Soul because I I I actually think this is what Soul is about. Correct me if I'm wrong. I haven't seen the movie in two years, but it's like about it's kind of about that whole like journey versus destination, flow state versus success thing. Because I'm gonna spoil Can I spoil the movie for you?

Yeah?

Go for it?

Okay, So this is my record, this is my recollection of how the movie goes. Is there's this this fucking guy and he plays the music and he like really wants this job in this like quartet or something like that. He really wants this job. This this gig, right, this gig represents like great success for him, and eventually he gets the gig, but it doesn't really it don't really hit him, you know, it doesn't really provide him with all the all the juicy goodness he thought it would be.

Yeah, that that sounds very relevant. And that's that's dope, man, that's a you know, and that's so that's so relatable, you know.

And someone's wanna someone's gonna comment on this and be like that's monsters, inc. You dumb ass. I don't. I don't remember that yeah movie that well, but yeah.

Now man, it's the hangover.

What's your name again, Kyle? Kyle, Kyle? I want to let you plug what's your? What's your? Goddamn jazz Instagram?

So my first and my last name are in the handle. Do you think that's a bad idea to plug?

Or that's all you? It's up to you.

Ah fuck it, it's uh. Kyle Brooks saxophone.

Kyle Brooks, saxophone. Okay, I'll go. I'll give you a check out. What's your? Do you like a pinned reel of your That's a weird thing to say. I'll give you a checkout. I was debating. I was debating between I'll give you a listen and I'll check you out. Do you have a pinned what's your what's your favorite clip of of? Do you do covers and stuff?

I do some covers. There there's a one reel I was talking about. I think it's like my second or third reel in is of me playing a solo that did pretty well, but it was someone else's solo. I I write like I compose music, and I got a show coming up. A week from today, Chicago, That's where I'm from. And then I'm trying to, you know, get some attention for that because the next day I'm going in and I'm going into the studio and cutting my debut record.

Dude, if if anybody comes to this Chicago show and they come up to you and they're like, yeah, I found out about this from the Gecko, Uh, you gotta let me know because that'd be sick.

Yeah, that'll be awesome. Man. Well, if anyone wants to come let me know, I'll about you. Drink Kyle many drinks.

It was good talking to you, man, Is there is there? I feel like this was a you know what, this was a good comparing contrast and a good talking about life. I feel like we we achieved the goals of this conversation, and I felt as though I was in the flow state as I was having it. I'm not bullshitting you. I really that is a true feeling that I have.

Like Wise, man, I feel the same way.

Is there anything else you want to say to the people of the computer before we go live?

Fast, Smoke, Grass, and neat ass.

Kyle Brooks Saxophone folks, go check them out. Thanks for calling Kyle.

Appreciate you man. Be safe out there.

Also, watch Up in fact, watch Up before wait, no, not Up. Watch Coco, Yeah, watch Coco before Soul. Watch Coco, then Up, then Soul. I'm gonna do that tonight. No, I'm just kidding. I'm gonna I'm gonna go eat something instead. Hello, folks, it's Lyle here. That's the end of this episode. But get this, I'm releasing a bonus episode this week. That's right, an entire extra hour of the podcast that you can listen to by becoming a premium member of Therapy Gecko

I like the way it feels to go out and scare somebody.

Why does that sound appealing to you?

So?

I work at a hated house. Me and some of the other scare acters were talking about like stuff we do in our scenes to mess with people, and I brought up that I really liked chasing people down and cornering them, and one of the other scare acters were like, mm.

That sounds.

Questionable. If I touch people like trying to get through quick so they don't get scared, that's when I like to chase them down.

I was actually just at a haunted house and I was doing that. I was like running fast through the thing so that people couldn't scare me, but I knew that it made them want to scare me more.

If you'd like I could give you some advice to make yourself less of a target.

Yeah, I will give us some advice on how you can be less of a target at a haunted house. If you want to hear this full conversation, you can sign up to become a premium member at Therapy Gecko dot supercast dot com or find the link in the episode description that's therapy Gecko dot supercast dot com. All right, I have nothing else to say.

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