“I WANT TO FUCK LIGHTNING MCQUEEN”

Hey, folks, it's Lyle get this. I'm coming to over forty cities across the United States, the UK, Europe, and Australia to do this here Therapy Gecko Podcast Live. These shows will involve bringing folks from the audience up on stage to talk to a gecko about whatever they want, just like we do on the podcast. The shows are completely unplanned, completely unpredictable, and they will be a lot of fun. So if you're a fan of the podcast,

How a youself?

What is it you want to talk about today?

Okay, So I have kind of a peculiar situation with a friend that I've known for a while. I want to see how you thought about it.

Okay, let's hear it.

Okay, So again, this is a friend of known since I was. Basically he was next to me growing up to be hung out all the time, and actually went to the same college, and he had confided in me about my sophomore year so a few years ago that he is like only getting off to when he's with females or with whoever he is with, from like children cartoons.

Say that again, So when he is.

Like having relations with people like that, he's in the end of the bedroom, he can only get off to like children cartoons, like in his own mind.

Okay, all right, so when he's having sex with somebody, when he's having sex with somebody, he can only get off thinking about children's cartoons or is it like are the cartoons? Are the cartoons themselves children?

Uh no, So it's not anything like pedophilia per se, but like a couple examples, like I have a few of them that he came to me, where like like the movie Cars, like Lightning, a Queen Eva from Wally, like Tour Story, he like the Mary Jane like stuff like that.

M hmm. Wait, so you're telling me that your friend, when he's having sex with somebody, he can only get off if he thinks of Lightning with Queen from Cars, basically, yes, Well he sounds.

Awesome, he sounds he's a good guy. But I just kind of like weirded out by the situation.

Mm hmmm mm hm. Why why does that weird you out?

Uh? Because like, uh, it's it's more like when like guys are having a guy talk, you know, where a group of friends something. He'll not saying this, but it's only when like we're alone and he's trying to talk about it, and he brings it up quite frequently, like at the moment he has a girlfriend, and it's just kind of awkward.

Okay, I'm a level your is your your friend? I mean, is he fucking with you?

I don't think so. Like I think he's like fully serious because he'll go into depth with this stuff.

What makes you think he's not fucking with you?

Uh, the fact that it's like it's not like a one time thing. I feel like if he's fucking with me, it would be like, oh, he said it, and then he'll kind of joke about it. But like it's been multiple times, like like multiple multiple times, or he he's come up to me and talked about this.

I So, are you sure he's not like just really fucking with you.

Honestly, I don't think so. He's not that kind of guy. Like he's a very kind of like sweet kid, and he's kind of a little awkward. But I don't think he's fucking with me, and that's what kind of has been driving me away from our friendship. And I feel like he wouldn't throw away the friendship for fucking with me like this.

Mh Is it only like that? Who is it only give me some more characters?

Okay? So, like I was saying, it's like Eva from Wally Okay, Mary Jane from Toy Story, It's like the little sheep herder girl.

Oh a little do you mean little bo Peep?

Is that her name?

Yeah?

Okay, yeah her, it's Ice Age Ellie, like the Manny's girlfriends, the woolye mammoth tigers from Kung Fu.

Oh oh, the female the female wooly mammoth from Ice Age? Yes, yeah, okay.

I ever seen shark Tails or shark Tail?

Okay? The girl from shark Tails? Yeah? Yeah, yeah, the girl from shark Tails kind of hot. I don't know if you've seen that kind of hot? Yeah, but I get that one.

Yeah, that one, that one I kind of get but like the mammoth is a little kind of threatening or not for any but scary, like even a little scary. I don't know.

Uh, Mammoth the tiger from Kung Fu Panda.

Mm hmm.

Now your your friend. He's bisexual, he is street Okay.

It's it's mostly female characters, but like I said, it started with Lightning the Queen and it kind of like evolved from there.

Now these are all three D animated characters. He's not into any like pure cartoon.

No, I don't believe. So he hasn't brought any of them, is up?

Okay.

He also said he was very excited for the new Super Mario movie. And I can understand why.

U what Princess Peach, I'm assuming.

I don't really know and all the characters, but he really wants to see you with me.

Okay. I feel like we think it's Prese. I feel like we think it's Princess Peach, but actually he's gonna pull his penis out when Bowser comes on the screen. I think that's it.

I could do that.

Powerful characters, okay, but.

I feel like it was just powerful characters he would be more into, not like children cartoons. I feel like it'd be like actual people or actual like uh, like movies or stories of fictional characters that are you know, big and powerful versus these you know, like animals and toys and stuff.

I mean, all the characters that you just listed do have you know, undeniable sexual energies to them? Lightning McQueen, confident, charismatic Eve, Uh, you know, a caretaker, the very supportive ah that we already covered, the girl from Shark Tales. So let's not pretend like we don't understand where your homie is coming from. Okay, let's level with him on that. Okay, Uh, tell me more about why this is just serving to you.

Like I said, it's kind of in the confides of just when him are hanging out so like our boy time, you know, playing games or like playing Xbox stuff like that, it always turns into this conversation. It's always brought up pretty frequently. Yeah, So I'm not really sure how to digress from that conversation and more of him having these like in depth of his sexual experiences while thinking of these characters when it happens.

My thing with and this is more of your friend's issue than yours is. Look, I think there's a fine line, a major difference between being sexually attracted to Lightning McQueen and making your identity as a human being being sexually attracted to Lightning McQueen. And I think your friend has fallen into the trap of the latter half of what I just said, because clearly he's bringing this up so much because it has become a part of who he is, and that is in many ways.

Yeah, that's understandable. So my issue, like it again, like that's his issue itself, But I'm not sure if it's something I should bring up and try to get him away from per se because you know, that's that's him. I don't want to go into that much stuff to belittle him in any meats, But I you know, don't know if this friendship could possibly continue for much longer, if this is going to be all it's about.

Have you had Look, you got to have a conversation with your friend and be like, look, dude, here's the thing, Like if you want to jerk off to the wooly mammoth from ice age, like I implore you to live your best life, but I don't. You don't have to tell me about it every time you do.

Okay, that's understandable. But what if he takes that the wrong way. Hey, I'm the only person he could talk about this too.

Just let him. Yeah. Well, I mean, look, you got it. I mean we got to get serious. Yeah, I mean, look, it's just about setting boundaries. I think, you know, if you don't want to talk about maybe give him an allowance. Like you can describe suck fuck I guess you would fuck the engine hole, the exhaust pipe. Yeah, I know he can tell him, he can. Okay, so you weren't even listening when he was telling you about all this stuff.

I try to drown it out, like it's more of like the last time he had talked about it was like Doc Hudson, which is not you know, it's kind of like an older car per se. But he was more of like describing the sexual features of the car than like the actual presence of fucking the car.

What what was he what was he saying?

Like how smooth it is, and how like the curves are all together, and how like he's very shiny and the fender is just right in your face. He also said that the lips were perfect size and succulent, and that is in the direct quote.

I don't know where in the universe exactly, but somewhere out there is a perfect community for your friend to exist in, and it is probably not you. So I don't know, maybe you let him free and you let him experiment, because look, he's there's got to be somebody else who is as obsessed with fucking cartoon characters as your friend is, and for his own sake, he should, you know, spend some time finding that person instead of wasting his breath on you.

Okay, So do you think, like, in terms of the friendship, I should have a conversation with him, and it's like disagreeable at all, I should probably just cut him loose.

Yeah, I think I think, uh, well, I'm not going to tell you expressly what to do, but I think you should have a conversation with him. And if he, you know, continues to bring up all this stuff, then uh he didn't, then he doesn't give a shit about you know, the boundaries that you have tried to set with him, and I think that's legitimate grounds for not wanting to be around him as much.

Yeah, that's my thought as well. I just want to talk to someone about it. It's kind of weird to talk to him, I know, because obviously they'll know who I'm talking about.

That is funny that they would. They would obviously know who you're talking about unless you have multiple friends Like this, well.

It's my childhood friend, so obviously everyone know who that is.

Well I, by the way, I have to ask, like as I just have just you know and look and look this you know question doesn't come from anywhere in particular, but I am as his childhood friend, I have to know what was his childhood like.

Nothing too like crazy, I feel like as a snared children like growing up wise like he had no major issues in his life. Parents are both still there, grandparents are all still there, luckily, middle class, good neighborhood, nice school, like it wasn't anything to bring out these certain desires per se, like no trauma on his life could kind of contend with it. So I'm not really sure where

Don't let him back off in the theater during the Mario movie. Do that for the sake of society.

Having the conversation before that comes.

Out, hopefully.

Is there anything else you want to say to the people of the computer before we go, Matthew, just.

Have a great night. Everyone you to thank you?

Mm hm.

Oh, how about this one? The ants from ants? I say no more? Who plays the the fish in Shark Tale? Who is that? Angelina? Angelina? Joe Lee plays that fish? Give it to him, give give him the give him the fish from Shark Tale? Let him have that one. Hi there, how's it going now? It's going good? How are you?

I'm just chilling with my cat, and I figured I tell you guys about a time when I worked in like a customer support job. We'll keep some some details light. I would I would basically help them with their internet you know, they call in, have me reset their password, turn on and off their WiFi box, and uh. Essentially, essentially the unusual part.

Is it says here that you used to use Google to look at random people's houses.

Yeah, so you ever go on Google street View and just kind of walk around. Yeah, you know, just just get in the sights. I really like doing that. It's it's pretty therapeutic. It's something that I've come back to a lot, and it just just reminded me of the show. You know, when you go to Vegas and meet random people, it's like fishing. You know, you meet a random person and make a connection with them. You know, I think about, you know, somebody's grandma that I helped connect their printer,

Okay, so sot me can I can? I let me interview for a second. So I just want to make sure this is clear. So you you talk to the grandma, you help her with her internet, and then you look up her address on Google Maps and look at her.

House basically in another tab. And it was you know, I try to you know, people that were angry or people that.

Were okay, wait real quick, real quick. So all right, so you you okay, now I understand, all right, you are you are remotely on the phone with an old lady and you're helping her with her internet, and in another tab, you go on Google Maps and type in her address to look at her house, uh, to see and so like, like while you're on the phone with her.

Yeah, And while I was helping, there was a lot of dead air where I would just kind of like read them the Wi Fi password or something, or I'd be waiting for them to enter in the passwords, so you know, I'd go to their house and take a walk around the block see what their neighborhood's like. And it was really something that I tried to not be creepy about. It was more of like a way to travel. A lot of the memories I made of doing that

Now do you think it would be Now if let's say I looked up the callers addresses and I was like looking at your house while I was talking to Do you think that would be weird?

I see, that's the thing I'm trying to think. Was it unethical of me to kind of take that information like it is a little bit of a violation of the privacy And it was. I felt like it was more of a curiosity. But I never did anything harmful with it. And you know, it was kind of just like if I if I had been an in person tech helper, it seems like it would be the same thing. Like I went to their house, I was gone, I'll never see them again and I thank them for the time,

Have you ever gone back to somebody's house, Like you're on the phone with them, you're helping them out to tech support, and then while you're on the phone with them, you're out their house, and then later you're like, you know, I kind of like that old lady's house. I'm gonna I'm gonna like later at night, you're just in your bed on your computer and you're like, I'm gonna go back to that lady's house. You ever do something like that?

I bet I have gone through the Google history and just seen lots of the different places that I've searched when I was working that this is a very long time ago, you know, just to look back at all the virtual places I've traveled, it's like, I don't know's it seems like geoguesser. I guess the we call center part was just call center geo guesser. I guess I knew the location.

Okay, so let's talk more about this. You use this, uh looking up people's dresses that you're helping with tech support port and walking around their neighborhoods. Virtually, you use it as a way to virtually travel. Correct.

Oh, yeah, basically. And there's been a few times where I'm just stress and I'll just just type in a random city or or zoom into somewhere in Europe and go walk through the streets and street view and it's been something that's pretty cool. I think more people should do it, honestly. Now street view.

Now hunter, do you ever do you have the desire to actually get out of your house and go to a bunch of new places?

Well, I drive. I drive the same kind of route for work, so I do get out a bit. I've never I've traveled to. When I was about twelve or thirteen, I traveled to Texas and we went to Mexico just for day, and it's just a different world. Everything's so different. It just seems extremely extremely different.

Hunter, Do you do you do you still work remotely? No?

I don't anymore. Actually I used to go on stream view a lot more. And this is like back in like twenty fourteen. I think, do.

You still go on street view at all?

I haven't, But during the pandemic I randomly picked it back up just as I stress relief or you know, it's just a random curiosity thing.

Hunter, I feel as though you might. I mean, look, man, you're doing all this traveling through Google Maps. That's good that you're finding a way to use your desires. But I don't know, I don't know what to make of you, because it sounds like you have this deep desire within you to go and actually travel.

I mean, I definitely it's hard because I love where I live in Michigan, and you know, just for life circumstances, I'm pretty comfortable in my situation.

Hunter. People do this thing. People People people go on vacations where they don't they continue to live where they currently live, and they travel to another place only briefly, and then return back to where they live.

That is a good proposition. I feel like I would have to travel far enough to where it's a bit different, Like I haven't been up to the up and it's pretty intense, it's very snowy. I think Canada would be cool. I think we're going to go into Canada. It would be a cool goal for this year.

Okay, Okay, well, uh, I.

Guess I'll put myself in Canada season places to go in Canada.

Yes, I'm trying to think if I have any comments as to how I feel about you looking up people's addresses. I don't feel strongly about it.

Was it a little bit unethical? I think that I was responsible, I think, and uh, you know, i'd never give out some of these address.

Well, I'm trying to will look full all that ship and all the back and forth about that. I just want to get to the underlying thing with you, Okay, because you're you're you're sweetly talking about all this Google maps stuff. But what's all I really care about with you, and I think we've gotten somewhere with it is is what's what What's what's lying underneath all of this? Is

I think it was a I wanted a kind of visual way to see. I don't want to say how other people live, but just you know, other other It's hard to put in the words just the human experience of every person, Like I guess it's a parasocial connection to each person. Sometimes when people would be really angry at me, I would angrily look up their address and I'd be like, no, well, that's that's kind of shitty to just creep on somebody like that. I didn't want

I don't know, has someone ever been angry with you and you've looked at their house and you've thought about stealing things from their front yard.

I did have a It was a guy that called me and complained that his wife I didn't reach and I looked up his house and it was this massive house, Surrey. I really don't know what to tell you can get extenders or something that, And he seemed to get really mad at me just for I don't know. I try to be a nice guy and offer the best solution, trying to be a kind person, and I just hung up on him. I couldn't take it. I just hung up.

Hunter. I hope you protect your own peace. Okay, that's what I'll leave you with. I hope you protect your own peace having people yell at you all the time. And I don't know whether or not it's ethical for you to fucking look at people's houses on Google Maps, but I do know that I'm going to be thinking about that every time ill somebody on the phone for tech support.

Now, yeah, I think everybody in show will be.

Too, Hunter. Is there anything else you want to say to the people of the computer before we go?

No, I appreciate your work. Kick. I will love on my can and chill out and listen to Ress Dream.

Thank you for calling Hunter Bo. Hello, Caroline, how are Yeah? What's going on.

I'm great. My husband left me to go to Texas for work. I'm just chilling with my dog watching a Get Go. It's it's a good Wednesday night.

I can't complain beautiful. How can I get you today, Caroline?

You know you've been taking some heavy calls and uh, I just wanted to call in to just give a shout out and to all the blanky adults out there. I'm twenty five years old, i am about to have my first child, and I'm still out here sleeping with not one, but three baby blankets. And I've done my research and it seems that they're around twenty to thirty percent of adults has some sort of comforting item to sleep with.

I just wanted to discuss that.

I don't think that sleeping I'm gonna take the position here, Caroline, that sleeping with a blanket is rather normal.

But a baby blanket like a.

Blankie, what is the difference?

It's small. Mostly if you're twenty five years old like me, it's probably really tattered. It's seen, it seems seen some better days, it's for sure, you know. And I always I was always very insecure about it. I grew up with like sleep problems, you know, And I was always the girl at the sleepovers even in high school, like bringing my baby blanket and like hiding it and stuff. And then I was like and I looked it up, and I was like, does this mean there's something wrong

No, no, this is okay, And it's okay for me to do this because many adults will turn to you know, alcohol and drugs instead, and it took a really dark turn, but.

Yes, I'm just do you don't want to end up having to go to b a.

No blank He's anonymous, you know what. I'm gonna don't see if there's any around here in Nashville. I'm sure that they're weirder things that Caroline.

Here's my thoughts on this is uh, I don't understand. I guess to me, I don't understand what you're psyching yourself up about because this idea of a baby blanket is is redundant to me. I'm just trying to give a word, and I'm gonna go with redundant because you're it's fucking it's fabric. It's soft. Yeah stuff. People sleep with comforters and sheets and pillow and soft things to make them fall asleep. The this your blanket is people sleep with blankets all the time. It's it's a piece

But would you would you like scream bloody murder if somehow you are comforter or you're you're just a blanket that you have on your bed disappeared one day, or or if your house caught on fire and your blankets went up in flames, Like would that for life?

I I think losing my comforter and my house getting lit on fire are two very different scenarios. Uh. One would cause me far less alarm. Are you saying that your concern or the thing that you find strange is that you have an attachment with your blanket that is to the point where you would scream bloody murder if you ever lost it?

Oh?

Yes, absolutely, yeah. Not that it's a you know, I feel like there are there are worse things. There are for sure worse things, and I've kept them around this long without without losing them. But I don't know. I just and since I'm I'm bringing a child into this world, like are that it will he be like yo, my like my mom's like a blanky adult Like will he will he grow up and like tell his friends and be like, yo, my mom's a weirdo because she's like

Can I say you have a long you have a long time until then because I assume your child is also going to have a blanket. So he's a piece of shit hypocrite if he says that about.

You, oh for sure. And then this falls on me because I'm like, if I have, if I have a blanky, a blanky lover myself, like I need to pick out the perfect one. And while I'm doing that, I'm gonna be honest. While I'm doing that, like I've been I've been looking. I've been you know, scrolling on Amazon whatever, trying to find like the best quality blankets, and it's like almost tempting to pick one up for me as well.

I want to go down a path with this. Okay, So the blanket itself is sleeping with a blanket. Again, in my head, it's completely normal. People sleep with blankets. Whether you call it a baby blanket or you call it or whatever, it's a It's a fucking piece of fabric. I think what is interesting, though, is the attachment to the piece of fabric. So when you say that, you would scream bloody murder, like you have a very visceral, emotional,

Yes, three, I have three of them. My mom has a shopping addiction and she bought me three of the same blankets, And yes, I have all three of them. They're next me right now. And I have a purple teddy bear too, So that there, you know, they take up some room how long at kings heist mattress because we're not We're not all gonna I'm not all going to fit on here anymore with the dog, and my pregnancy pillow and all my blankies.

How long have you had those items for.

Since I was since I was a baby. They've been around twenty five years now, they're and they're they're still kicking. I mean they're they're tattered, they're ripped, they have holes in them, like I have to hand wash them and the air dry be very gentle.

So these are objects, all apart the s. These are objects that hold sentimental value to you.

Yes, more than like I picture myself being buried with these one day. Tell tell like that they've just they've been with me since the beginning of time, my time at least.

So listen, is it it's Look, it's not weird to sleep. It's fairly normal to sleep with a blank to sleep with a blanket. Everyone does. Sleeps with a comforter. Blanket and sheets are all the same fucking thing to me. I don't care. I don't care about what they're all called. They are a soft thing you put over yourself when you sleep. So we all sleep with a get of some kind. And it's a normal thing to have emotional investments and sentimental objects that have been in around your

No?

No, on vacation, if I'm staying somewhere, if I'm if we're you know, going away somewhere, blank blankets come with But do I shove it in my bag to go grocery shopping? I do not.

Is Linus a personal hero of yours?

You know what? I don't know why I haven't thought of this before, but yes, it's I don't know how it doesn't get torn at the scenes from dragging it all around everywhere.

But I do know what I know. Is it because it's animated, it's because he's a cartoon? Yes, yeah, But we don't all have that kind of privilege in our lives.

We don't.

Well Listen, Caroline, I I I know it sounds like you uh, you're you're, you're, And I don't know. I hope you take this in a positive way. I hope, I hope it's helpful for you. But it sounds like you're psyching yourself up over a lot that I don't think is worth being. Uh, I don't know.

Psychic very good yea, oh, I'm very good at doing that I'm very good at doing that with other things as well. They're probably more important than this. But uh, it seems all like top of the line. M a lot if I'm if I just get philosophical with myself too much.

Mm hmmm. Uh if your house did light on fire, I think that's worth getting psyched up about. I wanted to say that as well. You know what, Look, if you're here's the thing. Do you have a Do you have a job?

I do.

I I am a business owner.

What do you what's your business?

I own a social media management company.

Oh okay, okay, I look it sounds like that. That's that's a thing that took you a long time to build. You're a fucking adult. You pay your bills on time, you have a child, you have a job. All right, go buy yourself a blanket, Caroline. I actually I'm gonna say I'm gonna put I'm gonna say this, Caroline. I'm gonna say this crazy thing. I think you, with the money that you make as an adult, making the intentional decision to proudly purchase and use a blanket for yourself

You know what, I'm going to go all out. I'm gonna find a goosey blanket or that. I bet they have those out there, don't.

They well be financially responsible for us that that is actually how people end up in BA.

So yes, I will you know what you're You're so right about that, I'm gonna I'll look at Amazon first and see is.

There anything that you want to say to the people of the computer before we go.

I guess listen, if if getting it's getting to gekin gets rough sometimes, you know, I'm in Nashville during the Nashville show. We can always switch places and I can and I can put on the suit. You can chat to me. I don't have I don't have any uh psychiatric experience either. But if you want to reverse the roles, this.

Doesn't mean that I have feel like. This doesn't mean I have to like make Facebook posts for a dentist, do I.

Oh, I more meant you can tell me your problems on stage. But but hey, if you yeah, if you're good at I mean, you're great at engaging with audiences, it's just that and I'll throw you the content and you can write a fun caption if you want to do my social media job. But yes, if you want to switch roles at your show and you talk to me, you let me know.

Well, thank you, Caroline, you have a good rest of the night.

You as well. Thanks.

I would do that, but I don't trust her, no offense. I like Caroline, but you know, so there are some things. You know, we can cut all everything that I just said, and we can just end it right when the call ends. You know what, no, actually know what. Don't cut it. I said what I said. I'm a fucking idiot. Hello.

Hello, how you doing.

I'm good? How are you doing well?

Thanks?

What's what's going on with you this evening? My friend? Oh?

Nothing, just uh, you know, watching stream, hanging out. I had a little something on my mind recently figured to talk to you about it.

Hit men.

So I just got back from some travel and anywhere I go I tend to just kind of people watch. That's kind of my job. One thing that I noticed, though, is that when you have conversations with people that you don't necessarily know, you've never really interacted with with, there's there's kind of a a direction that that conversation is supposed to go.

You know, tell me more about this direction that you feel like the conversation.

So sure, So, for instance, how we just started this conversation, it's hey, how are you? I'm well, how are you? And generally it's kind of forced in a direction that isn't necessarily giving any substance to the conversation. It feels kind of superficial. And I just got back from Vegas and I kind of noticed that that's almost every interaction I had personally and just watching people, it's the same way. There's no real connection between people.

Have you felt this way for a while, Yeah, yeah, I.

Suppose I've noticed it for some time.

It's a.

Yeah, it's something I've always picked up on, I guess, and something that I've always participated in as well. It just seems like that's kind of the natural progression.

So you say it's something that you participate in. Are you trying to have more vulnerable, deeper open conversations with other people?

I suppose so, I guess it's hard to tell when somebody would be receptive to that. You don't necessarily want to make them uncomfortable with it.

Okay, Yeah, I got a ton of thoughts on this. I feel like in yes, it's true, there's a lot of situations where people are doing a dance or they're being you know, somewhat superficial or level one or whatever you could call that. But I think for you man, the thing to do, and tell me if you already do this, is you have to be vulnerable first. You You can't expect other people to let their guard down and open up to you if you're not gonna go there first, you know what I'm saying. Do you ever

I can't say that I have too often. I guess there's always the worry that you may make somebody uncomfortable by being vulnerable towards them. You know, that's a that's a good point though.

So it's a fear that you're gonna like say something that's gonna be awkward and make the other person uncomfortable.

Uh huh, I I suppose so, yeah, sure, it's I guess it's it's that connection is not quite there yet. If you're vulnerable with them, it may close the doors to being able to make a more meaningful connection.

Can I bring up another idea, So, if you're afraid that you're going to be vulnerable and that your vulnerability is going to turn somebody off, the thing is is if you're trying to surround yourself with and engage in conversations with open minded, vulnerable people, then when you open yourself up and start being vulnerable, either the person will respond positively and you will get to engage with them in the kind of conversation that you wanted to engage with,

That is an excellent point right there. Yeah, that's true. Hmmm, it's a I guess, uh. And at a certain point, you can't be vulnerable to every single person you talk to, So I guess there's got to be a kind of a decider of spencer.

You can spencer, you can fuck it, you can do whatever you want. You can be however you desire to be in the worlds to people you can bring up your parents' divorce in every conversation that you have if you really fucking want to, and you will attract other people who are like that as well. There are no rules that you really need to follow, you know.

That's that's that's a good point. I I wonder what kind of brought on that The general ebb and flow of conversation that we have right now where it's like super supersful is uh, you know that everybody has.

Well, it's fear. You've ever been to a fucking music festival and everyone's on ecstasy and they're all like spilling to each other? Oh yeah, it's everyone's That's all that's in everyone, that's in the you know, the thing that the person who works in accounting fucking is spilling to everyone while they're on ecstasy at the music festival, that's still in them when they're at their computer doing their EXCEL reports.

You know.

It's just that the environment and the drug and whatever it is is letting it come out. But it's in there, and if you want to take an opportunity to try to tap into it at a time, at a situation that's not a fucking music festival everrans on ecstasy and you want to tap into it. I think people would be excited by that. They'd be excited to talk to you because they know that they can be vulnerable with you, because you're being vulnerable with them.

Sure, I could, I could see that. I wonder so if your inhibitions are removed and you get vulnerable with somebody but they're stuck in the idea of those societal standards, you may get a false negative reaction from them that could have been a connection in a more comfortable space.

Definitely, definitely, But you gotta take the time. You gotta, you gotta, you gotta kind of give a little bit extra than what they're expecting and then listen to them to make it so that they, you know, feel as though their words to you are actually being received.

Sure, yeah, that's a good point.

Can I can I recommend a book for you to read?

You absolutely came. Let me grab a pens, all right?

So this is this is this is a dating book that I read what really kind of changed a lot of how I think about communicating with people. It is a dating book, but it's it applies to any kind of interaction. It doesn't necessarily have to be a romantic or anything like that interaction. But you should read this book. It's called Models. It's by a dude named Mark Manson. He wrote another book called The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck, which is more popular book.

But I've heard of that.

Yeah, yeah, but you should read this book. Again. It's a dating book, but I think the concepts in it applied to you know, all sorts of life stuff that has nothing to do with dating.

Sure, okay, yeah, So so I take it then that you you've had similar feelings towards bringing them interactions.

Yeah, yeah, absolutely, I'm always thinking about that stuff. I'm always trying to give a little bit more if I feel like it. Sometimes I don't have the emotional energy for it, And that's another reason why people might That's another reason why people might act cold to you if you are putting yourself out there. But I hope that doesn't distract you from putting yourself out there.

Sure.

Yeah, Uh you want to say to the people of the computer before we go, or any other aspect of this that you felt like we didn't cover.

Uh yeah, My buddy Andy absolutely loves you, and he kind of put me on to you. So I appreciate your time.

Tell Andy, I said, uh, I was gonna say, tell Andy, I said, he's a good guy, But I don't know Andy, so I can't make that assumption. Well, but I think I'm going to say it anyway to be nice. Expensive of course, thanks.

Call it the repeat.

Get goes off the line, taking your phone calls.

Every night, never beat cant goes to his right.

Was teaching you

About your life, but he's not really an expert.