Hello, Hello, Hey, what's up? Where are you? Where are you right now? I'm hearing some like stuff in the background.
Oh it needed me. I accidentally touched my cheek.
Oh hello, yeah, hey, I can what's know? What's up? Man? What's going on? Where are you right now? You sound like you're at a place.
Yeah, I'm at a hospital right now.
You're at a hospital right now? Are you working there? Or are you dying?
I'm a friend of somebody who's dying.
Oh, oh, dear, I.
Guess almost died, almost died.
They're good now, Okay, that's just a big difference this. Are they dying? Well, I guess we're all dying. But are they well? How are you your friends?
Oh, they're good now. They had like a tear in their brain from a car accident that happened years ago. And then oh yet super stressed recently and had like a seizure.
Oh good now they're chilling now, yeah, they're chilling now. Okay, what what's your relationship to them? How do you know this person?
Oh? I'm dating their daughter.
Oh, this is your this is your girlfriend's father, mom, mother, This is your girlfriend's mom. Yeah, and how's she she's doing okay, yeah, yeah.
It happened like a couple of days ago. They're just what is it? The dad asked to have her over like an extra day or two, so they're observing her, and she's.
Going, all right, all right, cool, how's your girlfriend? How's your girlfriend? I'm I'm here's the thing, and here I guess why I'm I am going to assume that I guess it's easy to assume that your girlfriend's mom is doing okay, because if she wasn't, I'm going to assume you're a good enough boyfriend that you wouldn't be on the phone with the therapy gecko in this moment if your girlfriend's mom was in horrible pain right now.
Yeah, No, she's she's doing wonderful. Okay, my girlfriend, she was trusted first, but she's you know, cause she's all stabilized now and thinks they're good yesterday. But yeah, so it should be all right, should be all.
Right for now?
For now?
Is your girlfriend there with you in the hospital?
She is? Actually?
Yeah, where where is? Where are you are you in like a hallway or are you in the hospital room? Like where are you taking this phone call from?
I'm in I'm in a hallway that's like a cross from their room.
M okay, okay, what are you How long have you been at this hospital? For so far.
Personally it's been like a what time are they in it? I'd say like two and a half hours.
Okay, Well, well well let's well let me do this. What's your name, by.
The way, Angel?
Angel?
Yeah?
Well Angel? I mean we could keep just chit chatting, but uh, I guess before we do that, I'll ask you if there's anything in particular that you called in to talk about.
I mean, I've got I've got two things I'll that you choose. They both have like a bit of context. When I was seven, I got legally kidnapped by my grandparents mm hmm. And then there's I financially supported two people for about four years to find out recently that apparently like halfway through they cheated on me the entire time. Oh my god, we got we gotta all.
Right, Well, well talk to me here. What's the most What's I'm curious? I mean about your life presently. I guess which of these things is more present for you.
I'd probably have to say the getting cheated on and say, listen me with like an eight point four thousand dollars bill for the apartment.
Jeez.
Yeah, but I mean like I worked it out, you know, just got to deal with the bill.
I suppose, uh yeah, man, what happened?
Ah? So, like, oh man, starting in Colorado, I suppose went from Colorado, we moved to Oregon. And I've known this lady, this chick name since I was like fourteen.
We're gonna bleep that maybe we're gonna bleep that we're gonna call her, uh, Lorraine so that everyone can assume that you're dating an eighty five year old woman.
All right, all right, Lorae, you're right, You're right, Lorette. So I've known Lorene since I was like fourteen, and was it. We started officially dating like seventeen. We move out together and like first six months is all right, she's hold them down a job, you know, she's doing all right. I meet some of her friends, her friends, and I we all move out to an apartment together.
We do that for like six months, and the original plan was like I was gonna move to Maine with Larat and they were like, no, what's uh, Let's go with the roommates in the Oregon because one of the roommates. Oh, grandma had like dementia and they moved her Grandma of the Oregon and she was like, you know, my mom will pay for it. She's well off. She's got like what is it called, like dead people money inheritance. There you go. So we're like, okay, you know, I don't
really know where we're going to get, no plan. Like I know, I was iffy on it, but I was like, all right, you know, if you want to do it, Loraine, you got this. So we move on over there and maybe around like twenty twenty one, twenty two, I think twenty twenty one, and I was one of the first ones to get a job. Lorraine almost the entire time did not have a job, so doesn't have a job.
But we're still like working through it. And there's one time I'm like, hey, like Lorraine, I'm not gonna lie you do they need to like make rent by the end of this month or no, I give it like three months. I was like, in three months you kind of need to like start making rent.
Or how how old are you guys? At this point I was.
I'd like to say eighteen or nineteen.
Oh wow, geez, So how old is she at the same age.
Yeah, yeah, we're like a month apart.
Okay, all right, so I mean yeah, so you guys are like really doing it at the fresh eighteen.
Oh yeah, No, seventeen is when we originally moved out. But eighteen we moved out of the state, and I was pretty just locked in financially, right, it gets to a point where I'm covering her rent and mine and that's like fourteen hundred and then I'm also helping Okay, what's his name, I'm.
Gonna go, well, that's I mean, that's yeah, that's wild to be doing that so young.
Yeah.
Yeah, I mean I've I've been working since I was like fourteen, so it's nothing new.
Mm hm.
But uh yeah. I locked in on that, like I got my g D. I kind of I was up in Maine for a bit and then I came over to help her out. That's the Colorado and then moving into Oregon. It was a domino effect and so what is it? Yeah, I basically do all that support them cover I'm gonna call them Zach cover Zach's bills as well.
Okay, who's who is Zach?
Zach is a fan a least name that I made for the guy she cheated on me with.
Okay, wait, but so why are you Okay, so you so you're living in a So you're eighteen, you're living with your eighteen year old girlfriend and some guy, uh.
Some not some guy. It's also same roommates that we had an Oregon. I mean in Colorado, we have an Oregon. Now we're not right now, but like when.
We okay, so you your girlfriend and so okay, so you and your girlfriend and these roommates all moved together to uh Orgon from from Colorado. Yeah, and we're like, okay, so now you're so you're financially so you're eighteen years old and you're financially supporting the whole fucking house.
No, no, just Lorraine and Zach.
Okay, why are you support Why are you financially supporting Zach?
Oh? Well, he was like, oh, there was a bad choice at the time, but it was like he was like I considered him kind of like a little brother figure, you know, because I related to a lot of the issues he had because through like a bunch of physical abuse, he was a little held back, like kind of mentally. So I'm like, you know, I kind of I pitied him a little bit, and I felt bad for him. Its like I knew how rough it was, so yeah,
you know, I got you a little bit. You know, I'll get you here and there, like so much so that I did genuinely consider him to be a little brother. And like, near the end of that whole renting thing, we're going to move into a separate place, which we did, but then he ended up on my phone plan as well, so I was paying for his phone bill and uh, paying for her phone bill as well. Yeah, and then what is it. We're moving to this new apartment and
she's having issue again. But we moved out of the like we moved away from the other roommates, and we moved into this new apartment with a different roommate, and we're clutching up a little bit. Except Lorraine loses their job, Zach loses their job, and then the other roommate also loses their job, and it's just me and I'm making, like, you know, fourteen hundred a month. I can't cover like two point one k phil, So I'm struggling. I'm struggling.
I'm like, guys, I don't know if we can you know, if this is sustainable.
Well wait, so you were making fourteen hundred dollars a month, how were you even covered? How were you even like making enough to like support I mean, I mean, damn, like fourteen hundred a month, Like, how are you even making? That's like barely I guess enough to even support yourself, let alone like two other people.
Yeah, No, it was tough. It was tough. I just had to Like it's fourteen hundred a month. I'm not like trying too hard, but I'd say it was around maybe like sixteen eighteen two k if I was really able to pick up enough shifts because I was like working at a David Blusters fixing up games. Oh and then the travel time was crazy. It was like an hour and a half, almost two hours to get to my job too each way. And yeah, yeah.
And you're and you're doing and you're doing all of this at eighteen you're driving, You're you're doing three hour commute every fucking day.
Yeah, to make and I'd be closing, so it'd be like icy, and oh it'd be terrible. It'd be like one thirty am and I'm walking it's like windy, it's icy. I'm like, all right, you know what though, like I like the job, I like fixing games, I like electricians work. So you know, I was suffering for an alright cause because I enjoyed it.
Damn dude, what can where can I?
Well?
I have a couple quick. I want to hear the rest of your story, but I just I want to butt in with like two questions. How old are you? How old are you now? How old do you know?
I turned twenty one in March.
You turn twenty one in March. Yeah, I thought you were like at least seven years older than me. Honest to god, No, you have You have the march. You have the demeanor and the the ethics of someone who I thought was at least thirty nine years old.
I appreciate that. A lot of people tell me I have a lot of restraint. Like it was me and my it was me and your situation. I would have been like airing the place. They're like starting fights, and I'm like, yeah, I'm just too tired for that. You know, HEEZU are kidnapped?
Who the fuck are you?
Man?
You're what what kind of what's up with your uh? What's up with your parents? Like? Where were they at the time?
My mom is a main and she's dealing with like another two siblings that I got. My dad's he's a deadbeat, you know, deadbie dad type situation.
Mm hmm.
And uh, you know, my mom's trying to she was trying to start up her own business. I was helping her out with that, which is part of the reason why I was working at fourteen. Well no, because when I met her, I was like sixteen. So when I was working at fourteen, it was more like gang activity. But then I moved to Maine started helping my mom out, and I turned into like cleaning airbnbs and construction work and poring and stuff like that.
Shit man, all right, summer stuff. All right, so you're eighteen, Uh, your you move out, You're supporting your girlfriends and uh uh this other guy you're driving three hours back and forth to work bubblic transport. Oh you're taking You're taken the fucking bus. Your walking and taking the fucking bus to a day buster an hour and a half. Yeah, but.
Oh sorry, sorry. One time I ended up closing and I didn't have a ride, so I had to walk the ten miles. When it is funny, it was like one thirty am and I'm just walking all the way from from clack Toggresham. That one was nice.
I genuinely I feel I feel like such a baby talking to you right now. I really do, I really do. I don't know if you get that very often, but I feel like a baby.
Please don't. I've been wanting to call you for years, like I actually I called you one time and I made it to the wait list. I think in like twenty twenty one. When I first moved into the apartment in Colorado, I got rejected because it was a dumb reason though it was really dumb. I was like, what about streaming? And I was like, no that everybody asks that, so well.
Mist well here let me. I want to hear the rest of your stories. So you're okay, You're you're you're eighteen, you're the Dave and Buster's hero, You're taking the bus, You're walking home in the rain. What, uh yeah? But ahead.
Yeah. So then we move into this other apartment with the other rooms, right, everybody loses their job. Nikkia's packing stuff and I'm I'm a little autistic, Right, she's packing stuff. She just moved from like her room into the loft and She's like, I don't know, it's just cluttering, and I'm kind of a minimalist, so I was like, no, honestly, I get that. I didn't think of anything of it until like a week later, she just disappears and like sends us a message to being like, hey, i'll come
back to sign off the lease later. I'll try and help you' all find a different roommate, but I can't do it. A little before then, I break up with Lorraine because it's like, you know, it's draining. I can't handle it. And she immediately gets with Zach, like immediately sleeping in his bed. You know, they're chilling together, cuddling up, getting cozy, drink and all that. So I'm like, all right, you know, I might as well, like I'll put myself back out of the field as well, which they get
angry at, which is weird to me. So it's like I'm following your rules, you know, like I've been. I didn't just do this randomly. I just want to, like, I gotta get my mind off it, because not only do I know you're with somebody that considered to be my little brother, you're with it like you're with him in the same house, I have to see it daily, like you gotta get you gotta give me a break, m hm. And so they they also tried to say like that I was a big cheater and that I
was cheating the entire time. And then I realized, like there's a lot of projection because since the old house, they would like like apparently when I wasn't there, they'd be like holding hands or like we would come home and they're like both asleep on the couch together and like stuff like that. But because I saw him as a little mentally delayed, and I related to his issues because he's got a dead mom and I'm a big mom in his voice, so I was like, oh, poor Zach.
You know, poor Zach. I wouldn't expect him to do anything like that. And then she right after they all lose jobs, Zach and Lorraine get together, we start to lose the apartment because right you know, nobody's paying rent except for me, and I can't pay two thousand dollars in rent as well as I like, what is it electricity? Wi Fi? Phone bill? Like food? I can't cover it all, Like I'm drowning. So I'm like, hey, guys, you know,
I don't want to catch this eviction. I really suggest, like you guys got to get a plan or something to do something because we either get the money to pay for this or I give up ownership because I can't take this eviction on my record. So they moved to Colorado together and I I move out and they kind of foot me with the eight point four grand bill, which is I mean, it sucks, but I've got to couch. I'm paying like five hundred four I guess, so I'm warm.
I've said I can deal with it. I have time to deal with it, you know, I can build it the funds and the girlfriend I have right now, her dad offered me a job like fifty one an hour at a construction site that starts in March.
So, oh wow, pretty good. Yeah, damn man, So what's yeah? Tell me about what what's your life look like?
Now?
I'm living with the original roommates we moved out with. What do I call them? I'm gonna go with.
I'm gonna go with, well, well, so, so how many arias? And I'm gonna probably forget those two nass but so it's you and and those two yeah, and so Zach and Lorraine are gone. They're doing their own thing.
Yeah, they moved to Colorado. She's still like making reposts about me, which I'm like, come on, man, if you have a man, you should be thinking about me anymore, especially you've been cheating with this dude for a minute.
Well so are you? She told Yeah, you go, sorry, go ahead.
Oh I was just gonna say I found out because she told a mutual friend of ours, and the mutual friend like reached out to me to be like, hey, I just want to let you know, Like she told me this, and I was like, oh, I'm at work right now, but thanks for letting me know.
So are and you are? Are your two roommates? Are they paying rent?
Yeah, they're paying rent, which is good. And I have very reduced rent because I got the couch. I'm only paying five hundred now, which is a big step down from like fourteen fifteen and sixteen hundred a mile.
Man.
God, damn, you're you're you're you're a real like I don't know, just talking to you, I'm like, Damn, you're only twenty one or you're not even twenty one yet.
You have twenty right now?
Twenty one Jesus week christ Man, You're gonna be I don't I don't want to like inflate your head too much or whatever. But you're gonna be okay for the rest of your life, you know what I mean? Because you I really I don't. I know that's a lot to say to you right now. And I'm but and I don't know how much that's worth coming from me, but just hearing the way that you fucking you know are just going out of your way to take care
of other people. And but some by the way, at your you're going out of your way to take care of other people at your own detriment, which has, you know, its own set of whatever's But uh, I mean, god damn dude, you just uh you got you got this crazy uh work ethic to you. It's such a Yeah, I don't know any when I was twenty, I don't know anyone else who uh would you know put up with all of this stuff. I mean, it's it's uh,
it's interesting, it's commendable. What's your dream? What do you want to actually do with your what do you want to do with your life? Oh?
I wanna two things that either you like, it's kind of dumb. But I either want to like pro game and stream or become an electrician. So I'm gonna rock out with both of those and try. I suppose are you already an electrician, adds anybody in the electrician field. Almost I'm like a game technician, or I used to be,
because I just switched jobs because I needed more hours. So, like, I know more about the and that's what kind of got me into that field because I was messing with wires, you know, I'm checking the olms of stuff, switching out microboards and chips and disassembling things to put a switch in somewhere. Like I sound that really fun. So it's like I either want to do that if I can't,
or not even can't. I'll even do that main or on the side if I have the pro gaming streaming thing comes to fruition as well.
Well. Look, here's the thing. If you think you want to be I don't know why I'm giving advice right now. You know I could ask you for advice more than I could give any to you, but I don't know. Look, if you want to be an electrician and you want to be a programmer, I think the cool thing is that you could do both. I mean, the electrician is probably where the money is and then you know, stream and play games on the side and enjoy your fucking life.
Yeah, I'm hoping. I'm hoping. You know, it's a big hope. It's a big prey. I gotta I think one of the big things I've gotta do is learn to like know when to stop taking care of people, because I think I have like a savior conflict about it.
Yeah. Yeah, I guess that was kind of one of the I mean, oh, I don't know. It's it's hard, right because I actually I I think it's obviously it's like good to care about other people, but especially like I don't know, just at eighteen to be taken on all. Yeah, that's this just too much. It's too much man at a at that uhh yeah, young of young of an age to be doing that. So I mean, I guess
I don't I really, I I don't know. I guess, Like, do you think that you're like taking care of people like to your own detriment?
I mean I think I used to. Right now, I'm just kind of I honestly couldn't tell you like if I am or not, because like ever since childhood. It's just been a thing to like, you know, I was forced to work since a young age. I was forced to look at for other people my entire life. So it's just kind of comes naturally, you know. So yeah, like I couldn't even tell if it's detrimental or not until after the fact, And like all the things I've
done previously are usually detrimental. But like while I'm going through the motion, you know, like I'm just doing.
It, okay, all right, Well man, Well look man, I don't know. You work hard, so I make sure that you're doing all right before you, you know, rip your own fucking uh, you know, before you stick a straw in your hearts and let other people suck all the blood out of your body.
So I need to work on that. I do need to work on.
It's been nice talking to you. Man. What's your name again? Angel?
Yeah?
Yeah, Angel? Oh, you know we're gonna bleep that we're gonna bleep that we're gonna I'm gonna believe, I'm not gonna we're air. We're a fake first name only podcast over here, so we're gonna bleep that.
I appreciate.
Angel. Is there anything else you want to say to the people of the computer before we go.
Oh, let's see we keep it pushing, Keep it pushing. No matter what happens, you can always find a way. You won't find a way if you're just stressing about what will. You gotta just do what you can with what you got.
Hey, take care, Angel, Good luck to you.
Hey, you too, man, goodbye.
Man. What a fascinating interview with a fifty three year old twenty year old That guy was. I don't know, sometimes you just like you guys, you ever just talk to someone who has like, uh, just makes you feel like such a piece of shit. That was what that whole conversation was. That whole conversation made me feel like
a piece of shit. Not to make it about me, but yeah, that guy what a he That guy just bent his entire body into a a fucking slinky for for people who fucked them over, and uh, you know, I'm sure I look it was a bit of some time ago. But he doesn't even say That's the thing is, he doesn't even seem rattled about it. He doesn't even seem rattled about it. He just keeps going. This guy he's gonna be even sometimes I just talk to people on this podcast and I'm like, Oh, this fucking guy's
gonna be fine. This person's gonna be fine because they just have the thing that lets them just take life's uh miseries and spit them out uh uh with with with so much grace. It's fascinating. I wish I had that. I'm trying to work on that a little bit more. I'm trying to work on like life not being perfect and amazing all the time, and the more and I
keep I it's hard. I don't want to. I just I know my own real life brain so much, and I don't want to be one of those motivational people who sits on a podcast and goes, life is all about perspective and then go into my real life and you know, mentally complain. But I just keep running across situations in my real life and in doing this podcast that just make me keep being like, damn, life is
about perspective. Especially you know when we have a caller like this last one who just you know, gets it, uh, who just gets it in the in the fucking chest, takes it with pride, keeps going. He's gonna be fine. I really I hope he You know he's unfortunately, he's a great target for like a love scam or something like that. I hope he doesn't. I hope he I hope he maintains some kind of like self preservation. This guy, right,
that's the way. That's a weird conundrum. It's like how much do you attempt to self preserve versus how much do you uh give to others? Because if you if you're one hundred percent self preservation, you're gonna be fucking miserable and alone. But if you're one hundred percent giving to other people, then you're you won't You're not gonna have anything, and you're also gonna be just uh uh an empty squeeze. You're gonnnna be a an empty plastic water bottle in a gutter. You know, I don't know
I'm being dramatic. I'm being dramatic. Uh okay, Hello, Hello, Hey, what's your name?
My name's Abby?
Abby? What's up? Abby? Like Abbey Road? You know the Beatles?
A little bit?
Not too much?
Sadly?
How old are you? Can? I ask?
Nineteen?
Okay? I you know, I was just thinking about this. We're getting to a point in time where I was like, at some point, there's gonna be like a generation of people who just don't know who the Beatles are.
Yeah, I'm sorry, do you know anything.
About do you know? Like, do you know anything about the Beatles? I don't know. I don't know why I'm doing this right now, but I'm just curious.
Oh no, you're good. Uh. I know they're I know they're British. I know John Lennon is kind of maybe a bad guy. I know they I know they have some pretty good songs. Okay, I can't list too many, but.
Yeah, okay, you're but you're you're aware that the Beatles exist. Yes, you know who they are? You know, like if I say the Beatles, you're not like, what's that?
Yeah?
Okay, but the but the information you had, can you name one Beatles song?
Uh? Isn't there? Hey, Jude, there's.
Yeah, Okay, there we go. Okay, all right, and you're nineteen Okay, so we're a we're It's only I think in the next five years we're gonna have nineteen year olds who don't know who the Beatles are.
Really, you really think that?
I think? So, I don't know. I'm such an I'm I'm insane. I I I'm in. I was talking to chat GPT and I was like, when do you I This is something I literally asked to chat GPT. I was like, when do you think people will forget about Garfield?
That's that's like how old me because you know, the Internet and everything, Like I feel like I feel like that kind of stuff's just going to be around for a really long time.
But I but I don't because like every because here's the thing, like, like I don't like if you're like, if you're like fifteen, you're probably watching some like YouTube thing that like I that, like, I have no fucking idea what it is like you're probably not like like the like when I was fifteen, there were still like we would go to I don't know why I'm going on this rant, but like there would be like a
movie that everyone would watch. But now like for young people, like media is so like segregated and and uh not every it's it's not as homogeneous I think it was, and it's getting like rapidly less and less homogenous. So I just wouldn't be surprised if there were like a lot of like I don't know, like people in high school. We just don't know who Garfield is? Like like soon, like where would you where do you find out who Garfield is? Like? Like who on Twitter and TikTok and
Instagram is like talking about Garfield? Like how do people even keep knowing who he is? Does that make sense?
Yeah? I guess that makes sense, But I guess I don't know. For me growing up on the Internet, I kind of just got everything all at once, just thrown up me, you know, so I feel like it's yeah, I feel like it will last a pretty long time.
But it's interest because when you say you got everything thrown at you all at once, it's like, well, what is everything? I mean, you know, who's you know, SpongeBob it's gonna do? I think SpongeBob is gonna be around for a long time.
Oh yeah, of course, of course.
But you weren't like when like okay, so the first three seasons of SpongeBob is where most of the memes come from. It's like the Golden Age, and like I think I was at like SpongeBob watching age a little bit after those came out, but you you were probably at SpongeBob watching age like long after those came out, Like we were on the SpongeBob seasons that people consider shitty when you were around, like the age that SpongeBob is I guess marketed towards.
Yeah, I guess you could say that. I think my parents actually bought like the older disc or like the older seasons of SpongeBob.
When we were growing up, yeah.
Instead of like the newer ones.
There go there, Like are you familiar you know the episode where squid word forms a band? Oh? Yeah, okay, all right. I don't know why. I just I guess I'm like pessimistic because I don't know, uh a lot about like like do you watch like mister Beast, Like who's the guy now?
I I don't. I don't really know. Like I think I'm just too busy with like college. I don't know. I write interesting thing about mister Beasts is I actually knew someone from my high school who got on to his Amazon show.
Oh really had that go for them? By the Dead.
I think they got out first episode. I think they had like a one like second thing.
But it was so cool.
Seeing that.
I have a random thought. I'm a hold on about it. I know that you called in probably to talk about something, and we're going to get there, but I just need to talk about Garfield for like one more minute.
Oh you're so good, don't even worry.
I was talking of I opened my l the last podcast by talking about how we're part of the six percent of people who are alive out of all the people that I've ever been born, and I got there was somebody made a comment because you can make like comments on Spotify now, and somebody made a comment being likely lyle you need to shut the fuck up about death. You're clear you're you need to see a therapist. You're clearly very depressed, but like you need to shut up
about it and like go get therapy, you're depressed. And I'm like, maybe I actually think this person is right. I think I think about death too much because I just had this thought just now. I was like, like, in like, okay, human being, let's say you live to eighty, Like how much time of the eighty years of your life does the average person spend looking at Garfield?
That's interesting. I thought it was a completely different route, more depressing of like you're being like more depressing of like how how long does the average person out spend looking at their phone? But I guess Garfield's a lot.
Oh no, no, that's really depressing. Oh well, because all the there's like you can you can mathematic there is a mathematical percentage. I'm looking at a picture of Garfield right now. There's a mathematical percentage. Fuck you know what. Fuck that Spotify comment right now, Fuck that Spotify comment or guy, I'm gonna I'm gonna keep talking about death.
It's important. I'm looking at Garfield right now. And it's like if you I always wonder about like, uh, you ever you ever heard that thing of like, oh, when I die, it would be cool to have like stats, Like there's a stat there's a literal percentage of the time I have been alive and the time that I will until from now until I die that you can calculate that is a number of the percentage of time that I have been alive that my eyes have been
looking at Garfield. And I'm just curious what that percentage is. And I'm curious what that percentage is. You know, nationally, across all the people that have died for nineteen U seventy six, the answer was zero percent. But then after Garfield was created, that number went up. Okay, what'd you want to Okay, all right, I'm done with this. What did you want to talk about today?
Well, I was just gonna I was just gonna ask how often do you think about Garfield?
If you're truly not truly not that often, truly, not that often. I just I don't know why, but I just like searched. That is because chatch apt It's like talking to fucking god dude, and you can ask it insane questions and it will human because if you because if you're like talking to your friend and you're like, do you think people when do you think Garfields will be forgotten? Your friend will go, what's shut up? What
are you talking about? That's a really stupid thing. But if you have a really stupid question and you ask it to AI AI will you it will use power to fucking try to answer your stupid question. Will never tell you that your question is too stupid. Sometimes I think it should sometimes I think if you ask Garfield a question like I mean, if did Garfield? If you ask chat Chipetia a question like when will people forget Garfield? I do think as part of a like an artificial
intelligence safeguard to prevent it from destroying humanity. It should tell you to go outside, but it doesn't do that. It actually helps you answer your stupid questions. What's up? What's your name? Again? No?
Abby, I do wonder what chat GPT would say to your question now though, Yeah, but.
You could just you could just keep asking. I've asked it so many questions that are just are like, I don't need why do I need to know the answer to this? Sometimes sometimes having questions is better than having answers.
Sometimes you don't need to know the answer.
Yeah, I don't like reading the chat on the podcast, but I'm gonna do it. Somebody in the chat just said good friends will hear out any question students that you ask, And I don't think that that's necessarily true. I think occasionally a good friend, you know what, Maybe
that's true. Maybe that's true. But if you if you ask if I treated my good friend the way I treat CHATGBT, if I if my good friend was good enough, my good friend would be like, you need to just you need to drink some water and have a cigarette and you'll be Okay, what's up? Abby?
You just got to keep people real. I'm doing all right. I just got the flu. But that's okay because I'm getting better.
Uh, that's a very optimistic talk to have. I'm curious, and it's totally okay if you didn't, because we found our way to whatever this is. But do you have something specific that you wanted to talk about today?
I have a very interesting story to tell.
I guess what's it about.
So I'm a twin and when I was younger, my mom signed me and my brother up for a twin study and it went very interesting. I'll say that.
Okay, care to elaborate.
So I guess I was like, I don't really know how old I was.
I was.
I guess at that age where I was like marketed towards SpongeBob, like what we were talking about. And there was this college and they were doing just studies on twins, and since I'm a twin, I think my mom got some money out of it, and she's like, oh, I'll just I'll just sign them up for it, like what what's the worst that could happen? And we go in there and they immediately like start asking us like the normal health questions like how old are you guys? Like
who's older? All that other stuff. But there's two rooms behind these two people that are like that. I guess they're the ones that are doing the test on us. And they tell us that there's gonna be like a quiz test and there's gonna be a physical test. So my brother goes into like the quiz test, and I go into like the physical test, which is like in
the room right over. And you go into this room and it's really tiny, and this lady has this l shaped desk and you know like those dentist chairs that are like like it looks like a dentist chair, but it's like propped all the way up, like it's not like fully laid back, and there's all these contraptions just strapped to it. And she's just asking me these very normal questions. And then we start doing the physical test
and it's like normal like blood pressure whatever. But then she's like, we're gonna do something different, and she like straps me down and like puts like those like laughing gas masks on me, and I guess she starts just like giving me some like random ass gas that makes me start to panic, but she's like reading all these super scientific calculations on her computer, and it was just it was it was very interesting going through that as like a little child, like, I don't have any trauma
related to it. I just think it's funny that.
Well, so is this is the study still going on?
I think? I don't know. I like, I think they're still doing a twin study. I don't know if they're still doing that specific study, hm hmm. But but with this lady, it's she was like she was just gonna be like, hey, just tell me when it gets too much to you. And I, like, I like to just started like panicking because you know, that's a really weird situation to be in. And so I tell her to take it off, and she says, no, we're getting good
test results. All the while, my brother's hearing me like scream and cry in the room next over, probably like really nervous for what he has to do next.
Right, what did did they? I mean, so did they did they get any conclusions?
Well that's the next part of it. My brother since he didn't do the physical test because he like he went to go switch. My brother was like, absolutely not. They technically couldn't make a conclusion because they didn't get the other half.
Oh so your brother heard you screaming and nope, doubt.
Yeah.
Basically they can't have a twin study with with just one.
No, you can't. So I just I like just randomly remembered this thing too.
Like your mom ago. But did your mom get any money for for your torture?
I think so. I don't know if it was torture. I think it could have just been me genuinely panicking as a kid. But I just think the situation or funny than anything. M it's very peculiar.
Uh did did your was your mom like mad at your brother for uh not participating in the study.
She seemed a little disappointed more than anything, But they still gave her like the full amount of money, which I find interesting.
M M.
I guess that just comes with like working with children, you know, like sometimes they're just not going.
To cooperate, right, Yeah, this sounds like how uh how people get humans centipeded? Is with like a studies like this.
Oh don't don't compare to that.
Well what's your name again? Abby?
Yeah? Abby?
Well thanks for letting me rant to you about Garfield for ten minutes. I really do appreciate you U let it being there while I did that. Oh yeah, of course, is there anything else you want to say to the people of the computer before we go, not really, just.
Don't don't trust scientists.
I guess don't. Yes, what that is a great message. Do not trust science.
I didn't think about it.
Do not trust no, no, no, Abby, you said it. You can't take it back. We do not trust scientists. We question everything. There was no such thing as verifiable evidence, and the uh, the solar system revolves around the Earth. Thank you very much for calling Abby. All right, see it? Hello, Hello, hey, hello, Hi. What is your name?
Hey? My name is Stella.
How are you doing?
Wele? It's it's what.
Stella?
Stella sure or whatever.
You'd like, Stella like like the beer stella arose h.
Yes, yeah, I don't know.
That's how stella because when the sun shines, will shine together. So all right, well, what's up, Stella? How you doing? How's how's life? Stella?
Life is pretty uh up in the air, trying to stay afloat. But I mean, nonetheless, it's good to be alive. You know, how are you?
How much I'm every single it's every single day I'm realizing that I I don't know anything about fucking anything, And there's like life can only be uh, there's a it's I don't know if it's a quote directly that somebody said, or if it's more of a just general adage, but the idea that life can only be lived forward and understood backwards makes so much goddamn sense to me. Every year that I get a little bit older and things start to make sense a little bit more, and
it's weird for me. Yeah, I'm giving you the actual answers to the question of how I'm doing, So give me a second, and you know, I genuinely I really like doing this podcast when I am in the position of like like being I don't know. Sometimes sometimes I struggle with it. Sometimes I struggle with but sometimes like to like today, for some reason, I'm having a real
good time with it. But sometimes I struggle with it because it's you know, people will be wanting I guess my perspective on things, and I'm just like, I don't know, I don't I don't really know, but it's I don't know. Sometimes I like it, the other I like it the other way around. I like when I get people's perspective on stuff. It's fun, it's interesting, it's a real honor. It's an honor to get to and that's all. It's an honor to get to do something like this, but
also it's it's way better when I'm uh caffeinated. I'm learning about that. I'm learning about how to be how to not be depressed. I think I figured it out. I actually genuinely think I figured out how to not be depressed.
Okay, what's the equation?
Okay, first you have to have five million dollars. We can't talk about any of the other steps unless you have five million dollars. First, you have to have five million dollars. And then you have to have a beautiful husband or wife that doesn't they can be they can be really nothing less than ten out of ten. This is the most gorgeous person that you've ever seen. And they have to love you unconditionally, you like you have to be you know, like like like they have to
love all of your flaws. They have to love you unconditionally. So five million dollars, beautiful life partner who loves you unconditionally. What else? I know? It starts with those two things.
Okay, Yeah, if you don't if you.
Don't have those two things, you're probably fucked and miserable. But what's what's up? What's up with you? Stella? What's I what makes you? What made you call in today?
Nothing in particular, I mean I just in general. I think you kind of opened it up perfectly with not knowing anything day by day as you get older, I kind of feel the same way, both like in a micro level and a macro level when it comes to just living life day by day. But let's get specific. Let me just give you a random micro level to I currently live with my sister and her boyfriend. It was just me and her when it first began, but now I'm really looking into getting out and just going
on my own. But again, that goes back to your five million dollars and someone who loves your own conditionally. You know, I don't have five mil. I have someone do the other man conditionally? No? Probably not? I mean can anyone really?
No?
I don't think so.
But I'm just stuck between, like, do I go on? I mean I can do it. I have money, not five mil, but I got I can go on my own. I mean, the economy is not the best right now, but I can probably be Okay.
So what's going on? What's what's going on with Uh, your your current situation. Why are you trying to get out of it?
Nothing's wrong with it? Actually it's perfect. Like me and my sister are great. We've been through a lot together and made our bomb stronger, you know, and I think living with her has been such a blessing. But I want something that's my own, you know, like my own space, my own universe within four walls, you know. And I
think it's just time. I've been in the same place for five years now and have a good job, so it's given me affording me the ability to even think about this, you know, like be able to say, hey, I can and want to get my own place. But then I just think I overthink things, especially when it comes to just making decisions in general in life. It's not like my forte. I second guess things all the
time and have to overanalyze and overthink. So I'm like constantly on the internet trying to financewers to things, use chat GBT to like to the finest detail, ask like how do I get from point A to point B?
Yeah, I no, I have I have a similar a similar thing. I have a similar thing. Now, so you said this, you have a person in your life and they love you with you know a few conditions, which is I think the best that you can get? What and what's are they gonna move in with you? Is that the idea or are you like totally totally placed on your own That's the.
Thing I don't know. I don't think financially and mentally there it's doable for them to come and be with me if we get like a police together, and that kind of like that hurts a little because I make it very aware what I expect and what I want, you know, from a partner or my boyfriend or whatever,
and it just doesn't seem to click. But then I understand that there's a lot of mental boundaries that can stop somebody from seeing their own potential and then being that for somebody else who has vocally let them know, like, hey, this is what I want, So I.
Can I ask what I mean, what's if if if this is you know something you want to talk about to go into like what is what does that look like?
So I mean he's my boyfriend. He's the type to like go back to the past a lot and say I used to make so much money and I was able to afford an apartment for me and my partner that's like his ex at the time or whatever. And he's like, but shit's not like that anymore. You know. I'm not the same person physically, and I'm not capable of making so much money like you or whatever. And I don't make six figures or anything. But I'm I'm
pretty okay where I'm at, you know. But he says that a lot, and I'm just like, where's like the motivation to be in this together, to want to make what I make or more possibly? You know, I know there's a lot of boundaries and obstacles that stop people from doing things like I'm here with you. I want to do this with you, like let's go, let's be
fucking right or dies. You know, Like that's always what I thought having somebody would be and os But like I'm ready to go through the wringer with anybody, like the muck and the mire, just to come out like the shining phoenixes from the ashes of corny.
Oh my god, you are you are reaching your hand out to this man at begging him to begging, but you're you're reaching this. You're not begging, but you're you're reaching your hand out to this man and saying, what walk walk the walk with me, my friend, and he's walk the walk with you, my dear. And what's his? What's his he's saying?
He says, yes, he says already gonna say when somebody is saying that. You know, he has a great heart, he's a good man. I'm not saying anything is wrong with him, but everybody has their flaws, and I want to work with him on them, you know. But I have also been And that's another thing too, is myself.
I don't want my past to get in the way of going on this journey with this person because I have my flaws of like the minute a voice is raised in a conversation or like disrespect is there, I'm like, no, I gotta go, I gotta walk away. I need to like it's done, it's over. And he's like, whoa, you know it's I make.
For me.
Well, like I said, I think maybe because of my past, I see everything as a red not a reflect but you know, something to be weary of and scared of and anxious of. And then I take it to the next because of the overthinking, overanalyzing. If that makes.
Sense, Yeah, sure, yeah, interesting Yeah, what's kind of what's so what's your job now?
So I'm basically an executive administrator for a very big, powerful organization. And yeah, it's it's a very comfortable position. It's very cool position. I'm able to help a lot of people and that's what I love the most. But it's I want like the rural life and it's this kind of job is more like city political you know, smiley face when you want to burn everything down kind of position, you know, And I hate that, but you
want it is now? Yeah, I do. Really I want something quaint, the traditional like second white picket fence or farm whatever, with the husband and the kids. That's what I want. I don't want this fucking business woman shit. That's so overrated for me.
Anyway, It's in your life and you're like like when you say like the rural life, like do you want to be like uh, like do you want to just like like just take care of the kids or do you want to have like work on a farm or like what's what's what can I add? What's what's the dream? Give me? Give me the dream for you like the dreams?
Yeah, dream scenario is, Yeah, I'm a work with my kids all day and me and my kids are doing farm work, helping with the goats and the rabbits and the you know, not the cows. That's a bit. That's a lot of work. And horses are too, but you know, at least like a homestead is kind of thing with the hobby that you know does his his gets his hands thirty two and is able to provide for us, and I provide for him, you know, in that way because of what he does for the family. You know,
like that's that's what I want. And away from the city, away from too many people, I do want family around, but just you know, in general, it's good to be to create your own you know.
M Now I'm curious and by the way I fall victim. People would not believe for a guy who runs a I really I hate calling this an advice podcast, but uh whatever, people I talk a bunch of shit on here, and people I don't I think, would be surprised at how often I google how to be happy, or overthink decisions or or you know, do I do all the things that you describe. I call a billion friends and talk to chat GPT about things and and and all this stuff. And I so I feel actually kind of
interesting asking you this question. But as from talking to you for two seconds, you sound like actually a person who's pretty confident about what they want out of life and who they are and whatever. That's just a projection I'm getting upon you. And so what do you What are you overthinking?
I think I overthink maybe that life that I just said to you right now in my head, I'm like, well, maybe that's not the way. Maybe I am supposed to be this cocktail hour business woman, maybe with a high rise and Florida sailing windows and fucking you know, girls' night and stuff like that, like the basic non traditional woman. I guess, yeah, I second guess that, and then I second guess, hey, maybe this person isn't.
The ones for me.
And but then I'm like, wait, aren't you supposed to stay and fight for things? You know? And this is the most healthiest relationship I've ever been, and like he is, I love him, Like he's great. But again, past stuff, right, and then you second guess and overanalyze, and yeah, like I could take it back all the way to childhood type of overanalyzing. Like that's how much I go into the thinking I was even like I even have to get off of breath control because it was making me
so existential evil. Like I would smoke weed and I was on birth control and I literally thought I was in other planes of existence because I was overthinking myself. But like, now I can do it. I'm true. I'm like, no birth control anything, and I smoke and I'm like, okay, I can analyze and not be thrown into other or of it.
But yeah, no, no, no, no, no, it's it's it's it's it's a it's a whole bar. It's one continuous bar, one complete bar. It's well, it's funny you say all this stuff because I I I was just saying that I don't know anything, and I've I've there are a couple of things I have come to fight that I can say that I believe with my whole heart that
I I won't question. There's a couple of things. One is that I believe this in like I gutturally believe this, like when I am in a like because you know, there's there's sides of yourself, right, there's like you when your emotions are out of it and when you're like in tune with your higher being and then there's you when you're like whatever, hungry or horny or sad or angry or happier joy to related, and you're like letting
those emotions run the fucking show. But me, when I'm in my like a connected to what I feel like is like, oh, this is like my this is this is my uh uh superego or the or the high in that state of mind. I genuinely believe that, like the ability to make the decisions that I overthink is like a deep privilege. It's like a deep honor to even get to fucking decide. And and like again, when I'm in, when I'm connected to my higher being, for you know, one fucking second out of the day, which
I gain, I'm really typically not. I just want to make it clear, I'm really typically not. But when I am, I'm like, that's how I really feel. It's like, oh, it's just such a privilege to even be like, oh, which you know, you know, who will I fall in love with? And what cool career will I have? And like all these things are like they're privileges to even get to think about. Right, That's how I really feel.
And so I know that to be true. When I've connected with my how you being normally I'm not thinking about that. No, no, but normally I'm overthinking and spiraling and whatnot. But the other thing I know to be true. I forgot while I was explaining the first thing, but oh, okay, I remember it now. I really feel like I'm coming to some conclude ninety I eighty. I'm not even sure how sure I am. That's how insane and I am. I'm pretty sure. I'm just gonna go with pretty sure.
I'm not gonna put a number on it. I'm pretty sure that people in general are happier when they're just in the moments of the thing, you know, when they're just like when they're not overthinking, when they're not talking about death and overthinking every single one of their fucking decisions, and we're just like, oh, today I have to, you know, milk the cows, and I don't have time to think about whether or not, Uh, this is what I should be doing with my life because I gotta go milk
these fucking cows. You know, I don't have time to think about it. I'm just fucking doing it. And I don't know it's hard. I because some people they uh you know, some people are like, I don't have time to think about what are this shitty office job is making me miserable or not? Because I gotta do it, And that's not that's ultimately not good. There's a there's got there's some kind of like ideal optimal, you know, optimal balance between thinking about things and being in the
moment to stuff. And I haven't found it, but I definitely know that like overthinking fucking everything is not the way to do it. And it's like this with I think, I guess I guess relationships too, because on one hand, you could you could sit and think, oh, is this the right thing for me, and then the other hand you could just be in the moment of whatever it is.
And life is I guess like trips to the the the basement of I'm actually in my life versus the the attic of let me think about things for a second. And I guess you just I guess you balance that until you die. I don't know the proper thing. And also it's weird because some people, like we all have like friends who they just somehow they just are not over thinkers and they just do shit with their life and they don't think about it, and they just they're
just innately fucking like born with it. Like I have friends like that, and I'm like, I don't know how they just I have friends who just do life perfectly without even thinking about it somehow, and then I have friends who cannot stop thinking. I leaned, I lean much closer to that part of the spectrum. And yeah, I don't know. I don't know how much of this is just you're just born with more neuroticism versus you just are.
It's you a person who does shit. But yeah, I don't. Ultimately, I guess when I'm in my when I'm in touch with my higher being for the one second of day that I am lucky to be, That's how I feel. It's like, oh, it's it's a privilege most of the time, though, I like every other human, like like a lot of other human beings on the planet, am you know, controlled by uh, fear based decision making and emotion based overthinking
and you know, all these fucking things. But yeah, that's my rant about anything.
I loved it. That was great. It resonated for sure.
Well, uh, what how old are you? By the way, because I'm gonna be honest. When you first picked up the phone, I thought you were like, uh, fifteen, but now I think you might be like twenty eight.
Oh shit, good job, yeah twenty eight.
You're twenty. Okay, you're older than me, all right, I am.
Well sometimes I like that though, honestly, sometimes you make me feel like I'm twenty or something like.
Wait, I appreciate that.
Please take me, please take everything I just said to you at face value. Well it's funny though, because well, I'll tell you something real quick. I was at a I was at a bar, uh two nights ago, and I was talking to someone and I was like, oh, how old are you? And they were like, I'm twenty
two and they were like, ho old are you? And I was like, I'm twenty seven and they made that face and they went, oh, like that was old, and it's fun It was funny to me because I literally, I swear my just yesterday, I was twenty two and I literally had that exact same interaction fucking just yesterday where I was the twenty two year old and I met a guy who was twenty seven and I made that fucking face when he told me. And it's so
weird that I'm on the other end of that. I feel like I just flashed forward into like five fucking years or something.
Yeah, it just had like a mutual memory.
Yeah.
Yeah. And now that i'm it's funny because I remember being like twenty two and I couldn't imagine what it would like to be like twenty seven. And now like I you know, I'm gonna Reddit and you read a Reddit post, like you read a Reddit comment or some guy's like, I'm forty six years old, and here's what's going on with me? And I'm like, you're telling me I'm going to be forty You're telling me that twenty fucking years later, I'm still going to like have problems
and thoughts and feelings, and the streams keeps going. It's crazy. It's too much, so much to think about. It's insane.
And that's why I have to stop myself because then everything else that's like literally in my face happening in my life is not going to get that way because I will go that far into my drinking. Yeah, back to what you said, just being present in the moment and having like that attitude of grace and gratitude that you get to have these fucking decisions be so in your life and not like, hey, what am I going to do the next day? Which money do have to
think of? Like that? But I agree with you. And then also I do like I go to my faith a lot, and that does keep me grounded and stable half the time most of the time, actually five percent of the time.
Are you religious?
I'm yeah, sure, I guess, you know, I really it's the cliche thing where people say I have a relationship with with Christ. You know, that's like that's how I see it. Cool, But yeah, religious.
Cool, cool. I think that's good. I think having a you know, I don't know. I've been thinking about, like it's funny because I think when you're like when you're like a young atheist or whatever, you're kind of like you're kind of like blow uh, I think, blow it off. But then you're like, oh, it's kind of nice to like believe in something, you know. M hmm.
Yeah, there's a peace and comfort that comes with it. It's like, you don't I kind of like the thought of not having to control everything in my life.
Like literally, if.
There was God could just take everything and do anything with my life, I wouldn't I wouldn't.
Mind, right, right, I was thinking about I was actually gonna bring this up when I was on this rant is I'm if somebody has, if somebody had there's an experience with this, please call in. I would love to talk to you. But I was thinking about like arranged marriage, you know, and it's like, on one hand, it's like, oh, arranged marriage, it's like the ultimate like uh, you know, lack of freedom like your parents. It's a very like Unamerican idea like your parents, like pick who you're gonna
like your life is like chosen. This huge thing is like chosen for you, you know, and it's like a very I don't know, Like I there there's a lot of course on paper wrong with that idea. But then in the back of my mind, I'm a little bit like, oh, there's something about like you're okay, this is what you got to deal with, and no, you don't get to decide whether or not it works for you. You just have
to fucking deal with it. I'm like, oh, that has Yeah, I'm like, oh, that probably has like prose to it. If someone is listening to this and has experienced with it, please call it. I'm curious about it because they might call it and be like it sucked.
But anyway, yeah, I can't even speak on that. I thought the same as you. I can't speak on it. No arrange my maverages over here, but just the thought of like if I had a healthy family dynamic and relationship, they would have my best interest in picking you know, this person who's going to be able to provide for me and for the family, right, because it's the whole endeavor, it's not just about me and this other person. It feels comforting in a way. But again I can't speak
on it's not a part of my circle. But that's my thoughts anyway. But pros and cons are everything, and like you said, everything's a balanced.
Well Stella, is there anything else that you wanted to talk about or say to the people of the computer before we go, Not at all.
Also, your voice sounds completely normal. Doesn't sound any different than on the podcast.
Well good, I'm very honored to have a normal voice.
Yes, normal it can be.
It was great talking to you, talking to you too, Stella. I hope you have a good rest of your entire life. And I will, I will, I will see you around the universe.
Yep.
I send to you.
All right, take care? Stell all right? Is it stella arose? Stera? Stella? Hold on, I'm gonna figure out how you fucking pronounce this stella? Okay, well, everyone's everyone, Everyone shut up for a second. I'm trying to think everyone. Everyone's, everyone's I'm trying to think everyone stop. Okay, Stella erotis are totis? Why would you name your products something that people can't even say it? Stella are I'm gonna say it's stella artois.
How do you pronounce it? Stella artois phonetic pronounce pronounce pronunciation are ta? What the fuck? Okay, it's stella artois. This looks if you read it literally, it's stella artois. I'm calling it artis. Why would you name your product something that people can't say what it is? Okay? Sorry, goes on the line, taking your phone calls every night. The pan goes to his side. He's teaching you cloud of your life, but he's not really an expert.