“I’M LIVING WITH MY EX”

Hello, Hey, what's up man? What's your name? Oh?

My name's Taz Taz like the like.

The Tasmanian Devil. Yes, sir, well, Tasmanian devil. What's going on?

Well, I've had a crazy last few months and I figured you. I tried calling in it to tell you about it before, but you said my phone sucked.

So oh well your phone sounds good now, so let's hear it.

Yeah.

Well, let's see about say, about five months ago, me and my wife were splitting up, and she said she was going to go down to her mom's for a little bit, just to have some time apart, because we've been married for about five years and been up each others, but literally the whole time, never spent a day apart. And then she said she was doing that and I said, okay.

That's very crazy. You let her move back in with you?

Yeah, man, I couldn't let her just be homeless and live outside and have my son. You know, I still unfortunately, I still love her, So yeah, I just I let her move back in.

And how long it was this?

She just moved back in probably two months ago.

And is she still there?

Yep?

And does your son live there?

Yeah, my son's staying with me. The dude that she moved in with in Florida, he's only three, and he abused him with a belt and all sorts of stuff. So I told her I'm not letting her go anywhere with my son again.

The Okay, So the guy that your wife left you for, who she met on the internet and living down to Florida, you found out that he hit your.

Son, yeah, with a belt and he's only three.

Thats fucking sucks, man. I'm sorry to hear that. That's crazy.

Yeah, it's all right, It definitely makes my blood boil. And I told her, I don't ever want to see this dude, because you know, a father might not react too well to the man that was abusing his son.

All right, So so where where where's that guy? So she's just been living with you for two months, she's pregnant with this guy's kid, and she's your son. And what she's like, where's the guy? The guy's just down in Florida. Is she's still seeing him? What's going on with that?

Yeah, the guy's down in Florida. And she when she moved back up here, she's saying that she wants to get back with me and wants to be with me and all this stuff. But I'm not too sure about all that. But she said that she's still going to continue to talk to this dude, text him and talk to him on the phone and all this stuff. And she didn't care whether I was okay with it or not. And she said that's what she's going to do. But she wants to be with me. She wants us to

She wants to get back together with you? Yes, Oh my god, man, how's your relationship with your three year old son who's living with you. How's that that sounds good?

Yeah, He's the only reason I get up and go to work every day. Really, I mean before I had a family to take care of him. When they left, I kind of felt like I lost my purpose, so I started slacking off at work and showing up late and stuff like that. But now that he's back, I feel like it kind of gives me the motivation to wake up at four o'clock in the morning and drive an hour and a half to work every day.

Is here says here? You're twenty six, Yes, sir, yep. God damn man, you're more of an adult than I am. M.

It's hard, but you know, if he's back, I'm definitely going to take every advantage of getting to take care of him and don't want to, you know, lose my job and lose my house and then be in a predicament.

You know.

Well, brother, let's talk all right, what's the give me? What's your best case scenario?

Well, the best case scenario would be that she gets a job and we try and work on building trust again, because you know, I'm sure you can tell that the trust is a little to none at the moment because of what she did. And like I said, I still love her. She's the mother to my my son. And you know, I feel like we're we're two halfs to a hole. We get we get along real well. We don't seem to fight and argue. It's just money has always been an issue, living in Austin, Texas and only me having a job.

Mm hm. So you want to you want to get back together with her and make it, make it work after all.

This I do, but I feel real hesitant about it, you know what I mean? Like who and then what what is everybody else going to think of me? Like I'm just a pushover simp, you know. Just she she left and come back and I just take her back, no problem type deal.

Mm hmm.

Well is how long have you been not even married, but like together with this with this woman.

So we've been married for five and we were dating for two, so seven we've been together for seven years. Me and her are the exact same age, were only like a month apart her birthdays in April and minds in May.

So we're and she's still seeing she's still seeing this this dude down in Florida, who hit your kid.

She told me that they're not together and that she doesn't want to be with him. That's why she left him to come back to Texas. But she said that he forced her to stop talking to me, like he had passwords to her phone and would look at that was logged into her face, Facebook and Instagram and all that stuff, just to make sure that she wasn't talking to nobody else. So he made her completely cut me off, and she said that she didn't want to do that, but now that she's back in Texas and she doesn't

We are in full doctor Phil mode on this podcast. Man, okay, listen, let me obviously this is a crazy situation, but let me tell you. Let me tell you one. Okay, Ship, what's your name again? I'm sorry, I'm stupid, tes Tess, Tess from everything that you have told me, and I know in your brain maybe you beat yourself up of like, oh, I'm a simp or whatever you strike me. And I mean this as a guy who has a lot of integrity and care for other people and for his family, right,

Yeah?

Absolutely, okay, And that's that's where it's it's hard. I care about my son so much that I would hate to, you know, take him away from his mother, even though she did it to me, or or for him to have to grow up without his mom and his dad, even though I still truly love her. I mean, even though she did this to me, I still can't change if that change that, you know what I mean. I hate her for what she did. But at the same time,

Taz, do you I mean, I mean this with with with respect. What how do you? How do you feel about yourself?

I feel like myself isn't as important as my son. You know. I chose to lay down in bed and bring that life into this world. So if it, if it making his life better comes at the detriment of my life, then you know, that's that's what needs to be done. He deserves to have a life.

You know.

It's not his fault that she took off or my fault that you know, he she did what she did, or anything like that, you know. And I would hate to take that out on him by just leaving, you know, and being like, well, screw you, you screwed me over. You know, I'm just gonna take my son and leave like you did me. You know, I just feel like that would be, you know, not beneficial to him in any kind of way.

Does a universe of joint custody exist in this situation?

It does.

And she said that she would never take him away from me again because she realized that that was wrong. But at the same time, she well, I mean, I don't what would we what would we do? You know what I'm saying. If she were to go back to Florida and we were to have joint custody, it wouldn't really matter at that point because she'd be you know, five six states away, fourteen hours, So it wouldn't really matter unless she got her own place.

Close.

You know, M, who else have you talked to about this? M?

Just like my mom, But my mom is a drug addict and and doesn't really have the best relationship advice in her life, and that's kind of, you know, one of the that's the only person I really have. Everybody else tells me that I'm crazy and that I'm I'm crazy strong for you know, just letting her move back in like this. But at the same time, you know, they kind of look at me like, what's wrong with you? You know, like why?

Who?

What kind of man lets his wife leave and lets her come back just pregnant and puts up with it and is okay? I guess you know, the way most people put it, they think I'm just okay with it. But it's kind of just a situation that kind of landed on my lap.

What do you think is best for your son?

I think, not being selfish, but I think what I want would also would be what's best for him. You know, if she could, Like I said, I guess I can't

Well, all right, tell me this. So, all right, so you grew up your parents having a joint custody and was it a similar thing where they were in very different locations?

Now, they probably lived about an hour apart from each other. So we would meet up on the weekends and I would go live with the other one whoever I would or go stay the weekends and holidays and stuff with who the parents I wasn't living with.

Okay, so understandably that's hard, But like, what, all right, when you were growing up, what was like your relationship with your dad, like on an individual outside of outside of the joint custody situation and outside of his relationship with your mom.

I absolutely love my dad, especially when I was a kid, because I was too young to understand some of the kind of you know, living in in Texas and my dad is from from Texas his whole life, and he's kind of a racist, kind of sort of yeah, he's just really racist. And I didn't realize that as a kid, and so as a kid, we were great. I loved him, I looked up to him a lot. But now that I'm an adult and I realize, you know, whoa some of the shit you said as a kid, that's kind

Did he treat you well? Did he? Did he prioritize you? And and was he like just a good a good dad?

Yeah, yeah, definitely, and.

So but you feel like all the like fucked up shift from childhood was truly as a result of them being divorced.

Yeah, because if they were together, I could have went to the same school or at least not as many schools and made, you know, lifelong friends instead of growing up to be in twenty six and now I have no friends whatsoever. Just that's why me and my wife are up each other's butt for four years, because she went to a private Catholic school and I moved around so much, so neither me nor her had friends or went out and did anything. So they were together, I

Hmm hmm.

Okay, outside of wanting your wife back and wanting to kind of keep the household glued together, what else do you want for your life?

Well, I'm I'm currently in a job that I get, I'm getting a raise.

I'd like to.

Learn more about, you know, trees and shrubs. That's what I'm a tree shrub specialist, So I really enjoy learning more about, you know, the different kinds of diseases and insects and stuff like that. So, you know, get a good job, and I don't know, I'd like to make some friends at some point, but I don't really know how to do that because I haven't had any friends since school. You know, in school, it's a lot easier to make friends with someone you see in your class

Know, Yeah, that's a that's a whole separate phone call.

Yeah, that's what I want to.

But these are I mean, these are good things to know because I don't. I don't know. Man, you're in a you're in a you're in a very very very tricky situation, right, Because here's the thing. If you didn't have a kid, the answer would be pretty obvious. But you have a kid, and you, you know, want to do whatever is best for the kid. And I, by the way, and I'm not saying either way, I really, I really am not. I'm really not going to pretend like I know what's best in this situation. But I

Yeah, that's kind of somewhether. The advice my mom gave me when I told her about all this, she was like, you know, if you and her are in a household and y'all don't love each other, or y'all aren't you know, emotionally connected, that he's he can he can tell that, and he would grow up with two parents that are, you know, not always on the same page or or just together for him, and it could could you know, affect him in the end worse than us separating and

Right right, No, that's that that that that's the issue with staying together for the kids, is you stay together for the kids, and then both the parents are unhappy, and whether you want it to or not, it subconsciously seeps its way into the entire family dynamic.

Right.

So, So I mean, that's good that you are thinking about that and understand that.

Yeah, and bros.

Also, you know, I don't know, I don't know. I want to I want I want to be careful here because I really, I really do submit to the fact that I don't I don't know what the best way to navigate in life is but ship, What was I gonna say? I I have, I have too much, I've I was looking at I was I was thinking about the Hot Wheels game for Game Boy Advance. That just that just intrusively entered into my brain. This is such a stupid thing to say. All right, okay, what was

Oh?

Okay? Sometimes like just just sometimes it's good enough for you to go to bed at night and go Listen, things didn't work out due to factors outside of my control. I wasn't able to give my son this ideal life of a perfect nuclear family that was his mom in the same house as me. I fucking tried my god damn hardest to be a good father, to do make the best choices that I could, but but it just didn't work out. Because in fucking life, so not everything

And yeah, absolutely, because hopefully, you know, he would grow up one day and I would be able to put it that way to him. You know, I tried my hardest and I really wanted this to work out, and you know, I feel like in the end he would respect me for that, you know that I did everything I could and hopefully he would understand that.

Yeah, I just hope you don't make yourself miserable. Man, Like, I don't think that that's the answer, you know.

Yeah, Yeah, I definitely don't want that either. I'm just kind of at the moment where I'm I'm kind of playing it by ear. I guess you could say, to see whether or not she decides that this is what she wants, you know, because it doesn't matter how much I want this. If she doesn't want it too, then if you know, it kind of doesn't matter.

So is that really what you want?

I mean, honestly, dude, I, like I said, I I don't know if it's that I I love her a lot and I'm just willing to get back with her, or if I'm scared to be alone. You know, I've me and her been together for seven years and we've always been She's always paid half the rent and yeah, you know, always just been there when I come get off work. I couldn't imagine getting off work and like when she was gone, getting off work and coming home to an empty house or you know, anything like that.

Yeah. Yeahs fucking hard. Hm, Yes, it's fucking hard. Yeah. But look, I've said it a bunch of times throughout this call, and I'll say it one more. Is that you deserve to be with somebody who's appreciative of you and respectful of you because you're a good guy. You know you really are.

I thank you.

I appreciate that.

Oh man, oh jeez, well we've both earned ourselves some uh wheels. Game boy advance, let's play videos on YouTube. I think after this.

I might look that up just to find out what it is.

No, it's not it's going to ruin your life? What's what is?

What?

Taz taz taz? All right? Before we go, is there is this just any other aspect of any of this that you wanted to talk about, or any way at all in which I can be remotely helpful to you, or any any words of any other just anything.

No, man, that's that's what I wanted to call and talk to you about. And you, you know, it's really nice hearing from uh, someone else's opinion, that isn't you know, on drugs, I can trust your opinion more than well I can get well.

I mean, I'll say, that's very assumptive of you.

Well, we need a drugs My mom.

Does hard drugs.

Anyway, Well, do you have any final things you want to say to the people of the computer before we go.

Yeah, life's gonna keep knocking you down, but don't let it keep you down. Get back up and keep moving, try and do what's best for you and in your family.

If you got one, good fucking luck, Taz, all right, good fucking luck and uh God bless you and your family.

Yep, gek forever take care man Oko.

Oh jeez. Yeah, that one's tough. That one's tough. I just hope he uh makes the decision. Like I've said over the course of the phone calls, I hope he seems like a nice guy. I don't have like I don't. I don't have enough. I couldn't I couldn't be responsible to a child right now. I really couldn't. I and I respect the fact that he can, that he really isn't isn't like pussy footing around the whole thing. He's really doing it, and I respect that a lot, and

Hi.

Hi.

What's your name, sir?

My name is Seamus.

Sir Seamus. What's going on, Seamus? How's life?

So I'm getting really into well, I've been really into them the past year. So I bought this fucking huge ass vehicle with my partner and uh it used to be we got it on discounts because we bought it from a skating company that was like not having very much business, and so we've been cleaning it up. Some gnarly shit in it, like a ship ton of gold underneath the seats, and uh, a bunch of snacks that looks like they've been in there for like ever, and some guy's phone like a whole iPhone.

Like how surprised you are that you found a lot of gross mold and food in a old van that you bought.

Well, it's only it's only a twenty eleven sprinter, So like I wasn't and like we've been like taking it out a few times, and like we've already done a lot of work on it. You know, we bought it around Halloween. So I was just shocked that we only discovered how much moltivism this thing.

Like last week, I'm gonna skip to the thing that you texted me specifically about. You said you found an iPhone in this van and yeah, yeah, and it works, and you said you found out. You said you found out who the owner is. But quote and don't. I'm gonna you said, quote, I want to make the most of this discovery before I offer to send it back to him. Like ideally I want to do something funny, but I dky what yet, what do you want to do that?

Poor?

I phone said that when I said that, I didn't mean anything unethical. It's like I don't think or really care if I have access any of like financial stuff or personal stuff. But like let me put it in perspective for you, Like we found okay, so it's like the last time this thing was turned on was twenty fifteen, and uh, it's got old the old Instagram app like it's got fucking it has Flatpybird on it.

Okay, by the way, iPhones with Flappybird on them actually sell for a lot of money if you want to.

That's what I'm saying.

Yeah, so you're gonna you're gonna take a picture of your cock and make it the wallpaper and then give it back to him.

I think he would probably sign that funny, But I'm not going to do that because the lea legal What is it?

What is it about the In the limited information you have about this man, how did you come to the conclusion that he would find that funny?

Okay? I mean, like it's not like I, me and my partner like looked around for specific stuff on his phone, but like just scrolling through his photos, like he took like news, like just news with his friends, Like there's a picture of some guy's ass on it.

Listen. Can I just say something to you? And but this is not a judgment on you, Okay, Okay, it's not. It's really not because I would do the same thing if I found an old fucking iPhone because I'm nosy and curious. I would do the same. Not a judgment, This is not a judgment. But if you're gonna go through the guy's photos and his life and his thing, just stop being holy about it. You're just you're doing it. It's fine, but just stop. We're just stop being like,

When I say I'm not gonna do anything on ethical, I mean like I'm not gonna like rob the guy and send or like send all of his money to like a big Point account or something.

Okay. Anyway, all right, so you were looking at pictures of this guy's penis on his phone.

Yeah, his ass, Yeah, and no, it's really interesting. So like he's We had no idea who this guy was. He had nothing to do with the skateboarding company that he that we beught it from, but I'm assuming that he was at one of their events because like we found his license in the car too, which is just

So I mean, so this guy's not dead.

No, he's very hes he's alive and he's h he definitely lives in California and who knows. Yeah, And I just figured you out. If I was this guy, like I would totally want a phone that I had like ten years ago. God only knows how he lost it on airplane mode like in the van.

But yeah, uh, when you hand it back to him, are you going to tell him that he has a nice penis that you saw on his phone photos?

I should totally him that.

Yeah I know that.

Oh shit. Yeah that's another weird thing is like you know it was at a pattery when we found it, we plugged it in. It was crazy that at work because the screen is fucking shattered and there was no password or anything on it. So just like for future reference, like always keep a password on your phone or else some rando, we'll find it ten years later.

And I always keep a pass on your phone or else. Some weird guy might look through your.

Yeah, some weird guy. Yeah, and then you'll call a get go about it and like tell the whole world.

So so I still want to we have to address this. You claim that you want to do something funny with the phone before you give it back. What what if?

What if?

What are some of your ideas for this funny thing you want to do?

I was hoping you would have it is to be honest, but I.

Have no ideas at all. Something funny, something, Ok, all right, I got one go into his voice memos and record a fart, make make all the ring tones farts.

Yeah, that's kind of like myself farting into the mic like with my voice, and I'll change it to like I'll record a different part for everybody who calls them. I think that would be smart.

Do you have a job do you have? Like, what do you do all day?

I'm doing the job right now. Yeah, I work in accounting.

That's cool. So how's the van life?

The van life? You haven't got to that yet, I mean like, oh, what is the van like? Is that what you said? No?

What how is van life for you? How is it going?

Oh?

I'm not I am not doing that yet. My lease is going to be up in like November this year though, and you know it's been it would be pretty hard to live in event, considering the old situation up until this weekend. Anyways, that yeah, I am. I currently live in a pm W and I'm hoping just like travel around you, you.

Live in a BMW.

No in the p m W and that's just the Northwest.

Oh I'm done, Okay, I thought, okay, it's definitely this has this has this has PNW energy written all over it. That's that's kind of where.

The oh my god, ship, you're right is a thing.

So when are you When are you expecting to get all the molds out of there or you're gonna get rid of it? Sounds like you're sentimental about it by now.

Oh no, I I mean like I I kissed them all goodbye first before I blew it away and vacuumed it. But yeah, I know so this. Yeah, No, the most is all out. It's just like I got to build this thing. Now. It's kind of scary because I got to like cut a hole on the feeling to put a ventilation fan in, and like there's just a lot of like handyman type work you gotta do to do this thing, and I have never done it in my life.

M Well, what, how's your partner? What does your partner have? Any ideas of how you can uh fuck with this poor guy who left his life in your hands?

No, I'm fortunately does she knows?

Does she even know about this?

No, she knows about it. She absolutely does. I actually told her, like, don't message a guy yet, because I want to know if like the therapy get go or the people of the get nation heavy, any ideas of what to do with with with the four Man's device.

What's your partner's deal? What's she do? Or he?

She works in an office?

She?

You know the most destiny, I just clerical work. But it was kind of her idea to do the them lifetime Do.

Straight is partner? Do straight people do partner? What's what's what's the deal with? Yeah?

No, yeah, well at least like I do because like because the same girlfriend or a boyfriend forever just sounds like really like childish to me. So like, you know, it's like I'm not at the stage where we're like married, but I feel like partner is just a better word.

What happened to significant other?

That's too many syllables?

Man, Yeah, I guess all right, So yeah, it's a legitimate argument. Sure, I feel that. Yeah, I guess you don't. How old are you? I'm twenty three, you're twenty you're twenty three. Yeah, you can have a you can have a girlfriend at twenty three.

No, No, I mean yeah, I mean I kind of flip back and forth the stream color or my old friend of my partner were living together.

All right, that's fair. I'm sorry. I don't know why.

I'm no, that's okay.

I have no reason to go.

You may do you feel bad because if it was your phone, you would just like I want to want it.

Like them back to you, with all the asked pictures and everything.

Well, if it was my phone, that would be bad.

Good thing you have a password.

What's your name again?

My name is Seamus.

Seamus. Is there anything else you want to say to the people of the computer before we go.

No, wait, but I did want to ask you a question, just a real quick question before before I go. Where are you from?

Where am I from? I feel like you're trying to hack into my bank account. I don't trust you.

No, no, no, But.

Like my main question is, like, are you from Chicago?

Why do you want to know if I'm from Chicago?

I want to to ask. I don't know what your what accent you have, but like I wanted to ask if you put ketchup on your hot dogs? That's all?

Yeah, of course I put ketchups on my hot catch up on my hot dog?

Oh thank god? Yeah? Okay, Ty, what do you now?

I feel like you're using that information for something?

No, I'm not.

Do you want me to.

You know what? Yes, I do want you to. I want you to use that information for something. I want you to find a way to use the information that I put ketchup on my hot dogs for something positive. Not don't use it to hurt I.

Will use it to make the world a better.

Place, honestly, Honestly, if you can find a way to use the information that I like ketchup on my hot dogs to hurt someone, do that. No, I can't my imagination maybe your imagination.

Is My imagination isn't good. I couldn't even I couldn't even figure out something funny to do with the guy's though. Now I got to report these parts.

No, I'm still here. I'm just thinking, all right, well you're who I now think everyone in Portland is okay?

Hi?

Is there anything else you want to say to the people of the computer before we go?

No? Do you have a good day to get go?

Hey? You two man, take care? Say hello? Say hello to the phone guy for me.

I will I will later. Hello. Hello, Oh my god, this is the gek this one?

Yeah? Who is this?

Oh? My name is Darius.

Darius. How's it going, Darius?

I am amazing right now? How are you?

I'm okay, I'm hanging in there. What's what's going on with you? Darius?

You know Mark's just in the middle of I guess I just finished washing my face. But yeah, I mean, I guess you can talk about what I texted in about all right? So, uh, how do I start? Okay? So I don't know. This is like two issues ago. I was seeing this girl, and I had been seeing

And.

Because I always had a bottle of orange juice on me around that time for some reason. But anyways, I was like, hey, I spilled orange juice on your sheets for me and take them and wash them. And she's like, oh, okay, you don't have to do that. I was like, no, I'm gonna I'm gonna do that. You know, it's a I feel bad if I don't take care of it. And then so she's like okay, and so this happened, I got her sheets back to whatever. And then so, yeah, two weeks so.

You pissed it, pissed a girl's bed, yes, okay, And what how did she respond to that?

She well, she didn't like know at first, and then like two weeks later she made like a comment, like a joking comment like that somehow related to that. She's like, oh, yeah, like what if you kissed my bed or whatever? And then so like I thought I had gotten away with it, and then so like I had this nervous look on my face and kind of hesitated, and then she was like you did not, like did you actually? And then

And yeah, what did she say?

What did she say? It was so long ago. She laughed, which is a valid response, and she's like, you're kidding, and I was like I wish I was. This is really embarrassing. And then yeah, hell.

How long did you continue to date her after this?

We're still dating now, so I mean.

Well, fucking Jesus, all right, you know, see that's not. That's really like what you want out of a relationship, I think is somebody who you can piss their bed. Some people like it when you pissed that. Some people like it when you pee on their face. Actually, there's a whole website of people who who are like trying to find somebody to do that to them. All right, so you're still dating this you okay? Because you teed this ship up like it was your you know, it

There's one? Well, there's one night I almost feed my bed. They drank way too much water, and then it was just like leaking. But that didn't really count. I guess, uh, it almost happened. I think it almost happened one more time.

Since then, tell me about that. Wait, so, so uh uh, how's the relationship going? Is it going good?

Yeah?

It's really good, i'd.

Say, Okay, has she ever pissed the bed?

No? She almost shouted one time, though.

Oh okay, how would you react if she shouted?

I thought it was funny. I was really hoping she did, because like she tried to fart and then she like jumped up out of the bed. It's like, oh my god, I gotta go to the packing I was like, oh, no way, did you just shart? And she hears a brand ran out of the room.

M m m.

I mean yeah, that's a good sign of a relationship, is one where you can you guys can piss and ship all over each other. And I mean that I'm not even saying that in jest. I think the tell, well, uh, what else is going on?

Not much looking for a new job.

But you know, there's a sense of comfortability in that. There's a sense of comfortability in that, like having having do you do you guys ever go to the bathroom with each other? Does she ever like sit on your lap while you while you take a ship.

I've tried to convince her to let me like tee while she's peeing, but she won't go for that.

Like it's hard to it's kind of hard to cross streams with a chick. Yeah, because I like a man and a woman crossing streams. I feel like that's that woman would have to be in quite a h an uncomfortable position.

Yeah, I was thinking, like, she's just sitting on the toilet and then like kind of like man spreads a little bit and I.

Oh, oh, okay, actually that's kind of interesting. Okay, so she sits, you stand, and she leaves. There's like a a but you have to have a very precise aim or else you're just gonna like start peeking under her vagina exactly. That's cool though. Man, that's a fun date idea. Next time, next time I google, Next time I google, next time I google. Exciting date ideas in New York. I want to see pissing on each other on the list.

That I hope so too. I hope we can make that happen.

What's your name again, sir? It is Darius Darius Jarres. How did you feel about this phone call? Do you have any I want to start doing like you know how you do a customer service line and then they're like, stay on the phone for a survey. I'm going to start doing that, but just it's on the actual the person who gave you customer service just asks you, and so you can't you have to lie to them and say it was good. What what would you any pointers? Any thoughts feeling sentiments, no goad feedback.

No, it was great.

I mean I was a little shook up because I wasn't expecting the call, but yeah, I mean it was great. I have no no pointers that I can think of it least.

Okay, Well, Darius, you seems like a nice guy. I'm glad that your relationship's working out, and you know, I'm excited for your wedding day where you can really just consummate that marriage with a uh just eating her ship full on.

Yeah, we'll try to make We'll try to make something wild happen that day.

Take Darius, you two. Hello, Hi, what's your name?

Hey? My name is Miranda.

How old are you? Miranda?

I am twenty eight.

How's life?

You know, it's going pretty good. I feel like I'm doing a lot for my age, though I guess in kind of like weird ways. I guess, like a little background story. So I told you that. Like, so I got into playing stems recently. It's a big thing right now, right so, uh, I usually do that when I'm high, but I recently stopped doing PhD just like personal reasons.

Know what I mean.

I'm confused. You say that you all right, you're married, that's great, you have a job, that's great. What about your life do you feel to be so abnormal?

I guess like I just wish that, like sometimes like we could just slowed down and like, you know, enjoyed our twenties a little bit because we both just like graduated college and just kind of like hit the ground running and we were like, okay, what else, what else?

What else?

What else? You know what I mean? So like we've just been like checking off all these boxes and not really like taking time to like slow down and like enjoy our twenties before kids and all of the things, you know what I mean. So it feels like we've kind of almost wasted that time that we had.

Do you have kids?

No?

Not yet?

Oh well then what go to quit your jobs and move to Thailand? Who gives a fucking ship?

What do you?

What do you?

What do you?

Yeah?

Okay, so I mean I mean yeah, I mean no, you don't you're not. Yeah, if you don't have kids, you can do whatever you want kind of. If you don't have kids, you can do whatever. I mean you some people abandon their kids, which I mean you can. You can do that. That's an option available to you as a human being. But some people think that that's not cool, and they have a legitimate argument when they say that. But you can do it. What was I going to say? Just now, it's going to say something?

I guess like my biggest thing is I just like I guess like I just feel all these outside pressures

Like you're like your like your parents.

Yeah yeah, like just.

Off man, you're hold on, hold on. I look, I get everyone has different relationships with their family, but like, dude, you have you have money, right, you have a job, you have money. You sound like you have an adult job that pays you adult money.

Yeah, So like that's the hard part is like it kind of goes beyond like just our parents too, because like you do your parents parents?

Do your parents give you money? Still?

No?

No, Okay, listen, if.

You listen, if you pay your water bill, If you pay your water bill, you can tell your mom to go fuck yourself. That's that's what being an adult is.

Yeah, No, I get you. That's kind of what we're That's kind of what we've been doing, uh, is just like hey, like we're not we don't even think we want to do that, Like we'll do it on our own terms type thing. But like it's just kind of increasingly getting harder to like make friends as well, especially like going because like my husband will be thirty this

To have kids.

And then it's almost like they get offended if we say, like that's great, you're having kids, and like I'll buy your kid a birthday president. But like I really think that's something that I want to do, you know what I mean, Like, it's just becoming increasingly harder to like meet people and make friendships like where we're currently at.

Yeah, does that make sense?

And of course, yeah, definitely makes sense. So it's something I struggle with. I'm trying to figure out how to make more community in my life. It used to be easy and now it feels like it requires a lot more thought at ten. But I mean, okay, but you're but I guess Miranda, like we're you just took me through five different conundrums, so let's start with I mean,

Right? I mean, I guess it just comes from like a place of like I've always been like just such a people pleaser, and so it's kind of what I mean about like just kind of putting like time into perspective with your life. Like I know, I keep saying approach and thirty and like I've you.

Know one day state.

Just just just just stay stay on this particular topic with me, because now we're talking about getting older and whatnot. Let's talk about like like like there's okay, there's pressure and influence from like people and then specific people like your family, and there's like pressure and influence from what is generally societally accepted as the normal life of a certain people of a certain age. Right, So I mean, just stay with me real quick on the family side

I guess like.

Just because I've always been like I've always been like a goodie two shoes with like my family, and I've always done like what they want me to do, and so like me standing up for myself and like what I want for my life, it like obviously upsets them, which again I'm learning to not care. But it's like one of those things where I've just I've never done that before, so it's uncomfortable to be like, hey, actually that's not what I want and I have to like

Yeah?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm there's no there's no magical spell that I can put upon you to give you the courage to be okay with that backlash, But I I think it is. It is a worthy thing to learn how to deal with, for sure.

Yeah.

All right, So there's that, and then there's like we talked about the just general societal pressure for your life to be a certain way at certain ages, which is legitimate. Is a legitimate form of pressure. I mean, I guess all these are legitimate, but yeah, it's something that everyone fucking thinks about. But again, but it all comes back to the fact that nobody, you know, in the comparatively

Yeah? So I work from home full time. So that's like another positive. So that was like one thing I changed a couple of years ago. My previous office was talking about going back and I was like, I really don't want to do that because I feel like I get way more like out of my afternoons and my weekends because I can do chores while on a work

So what are the mundane things like, you know.

Like laundry dishes, like all the things that we all do, you know what I mean, like keeping up with wiping down the kitchen countertops and unloading the dishwasher, you know what I mean, Like go into the gym a couple of times a week, like that sort of stuff.

You know.

One of the sacrifices I've learned this through touring and trying to travel a lot of my own personal life. One of the sacrifices of trying to travel more is that you.

H.

You gotta be okay with doing a little bit less laundry then maybe is socially acceptable. Yeah, you get what I'm saying. I mean, maybe you wear maybe you wear the same pair of underwear maybe four times in a row is egregious. I've done that before, but uh, you know, a few days.

In a row, right, Yeah, yeah, I mean that is like one thing we're like hoping to, you know, change in the upcoming year. Like we both renewed our passports and we booked a trip to Japan and a trip to Europe.

Wonderful.

So, like you've both.

Never been out of the country though, So it's gonna be a little bit of a shock, I'm afraid. But I mean, like I said, we're both always too careful, So I feel like it'll be good for us to kind of like step out and just go explore and check out what you know, what other places how to offer you know, No.

That's gonna be awesome. No, it's you're already doing it. You don't need a get go to tell you how to live your fucking.

We're trying it. We're doing our best. But yeah, it's just like I don't know, it's just been something I've been like sitting with a lot recently. It's just like, how do you not you like specifically, but just like how does a person, like a young person like fight

But it's just like you should you take advance. I think that you should take advant everything that you've have going for you in your life generationally, even like take advantage of it. Right, You're still young, you don't have any kids, you work from home, fucking hack it, you know. Go, I mean, you're I don't even you don't even need me to. It's a motivational speech you because you're already doing it. You already have the plane tickets booked in the passport and all that stuff. So I mean it

Yeah, it's just a matter of like, like I said, like I'm just like a recovering people pleaser, which I'm sure a lot of people can relate to. So it's just it's like I'm doing all these things, but at the same time, like I feel kind of like not selfish about it, but you know what I mean, Like I'm just like should I be doing something else? Like I don't think I should be, But at the same time, like I overthink it sometimes. So it's just like my thing is like I just don't want to waste time,

It does. It does, but I don't know why. My takeaway, I don't know why my take away from this phone call is that you should do the dishes less. Maybe it's not. Maybe I'm just projecting because I want to feel less bad about all the paper plates have been using lately.

I was actually loading the dishwasher when you called, so maybe I'll just wait, Miranda.

Is there anything else you want to say to the people of the computer before we go?

No, I mean not really. I just make sure, like the friendships and stuff that you have like count if they're not productive, you know, there's no sense in maintaining those, and find people that align with your values.

You know, have a good rest of the night. I wish you good luck on your journey. Have fun in Japan and Europe. Those are great places, and well, for sure, enjoy. We first started talking about this because of the SIM right, Yeah.

Yeah, I don't know why that like really triggered it, But I just got really stressed, like playing the SIMS and I was like, oh my god, there's not enough time in the day. And then I got to chase these kids to like do their homework, and they're failing school now. Because I'm too busy with like everything I'm doing or one so I'm like whoa, whoa, wait a second. So I don't know. I was just I got way too high one day and I was playing it and

Have a night, Miranda, thank you? Yeah, you know. Okay, Well, here's the thing, you guys. Ever go on Instagram and you see all those travel influencers who are going all over the place. And next time you see a really hot Instagram couple who uh is traveling all around the world and scuba diving and Greece one day and at the Great Wall of China the next day. Just remember when you look at them that they have been wearing the same pair of underwear for several days. It's important

For me, when I feel like I'm clinical normal, I feel like the most happy. I know that sounds backwards, but.

Tell me about what makes you feel noom normal.

For instance, like to me and my friend go to the gas stations and I want to buy something, like, I feel normal, like because I really don't have much money because I'm for college students, so I can find the opportunity to go buy even if it's seven nine sense. That makes me feel quote unquote normal.

Mm hm.

It's like having him to pay for me or whatever. You know.

I don't think that sounds backwards. Oh, I completely understand where the happiness of that moment is coming from. I don't think you need to climb to Mount Everest or do some crazy thing to feel happy. I think the best you can get is really siphoning the beauty and the happiness from something as normal as being able to afford a candy bar when you're going out to the

Never goes on the line, taking of his own calls every night.

The Repy goes doing his eye.

He's teaching you about the liver your life, but he's not really an expert.