“I’M DRUNK AT A MIDDLE SCHOOL”

Hey, folks, it's Lyle here. I just wanted to thank everybody real quick because I got a whole bunch of messages last week from people sharing their Spotify rapped and showing how much time they've spent listening to the podcast. And you know that meant a lot to me because I work really hard to put out this show. My editor Brandon works really hard to put out this show, and it was sick to see all these people who

Hey, get go guy.

You texted me and you said I'm kind of drunk at work.

A little bit.

That was it? That was it? Where do you work? Where are you are you going?

I work in in middle school.

Yeah, all right, you're at are you? It's like, well, all right, I mean I'll say this. It's right now. It's it's almost ten pm, so wherever you are in America, it can't be any earlier than seven. All right, what do you do? Go ahead? You talked?

No?

No, no, no, no, I don't know. Yeah, what do you What do you say?

Okay, you're drunk at your job at a middle school.

Yeah, that doesn't sound good when you say it.

It doesn't. What do you do at the middle school?

I cleaned shitters and desks in vacuum.

Okay, you know what? Can I say something controversial? I think obviously you know it's not good if you're a teacher or a principle or whatever, of course, but but if you're a janitor, you should totally be able to get plastered.

Why not that I'm saying, dude, That's what I'm saying.

Yeah, I mean, what do you really? What do you really know? No one cares if you're No, there's not even any kids there right now.

No, no, I was ten pm. They're all asleep or whatever. Okay, play video games or play Fortnite?

What are you? What are you drinking?

I'm upset what I'm drinking. I picked up It's called Bahamamaala, but it's made by Barsol. I don't really funck with barstool like that.

Why'd you buy it that?

Because I go into the gas station and I find the drink with the highest alcohol percentage and this was it. It was it like ten percent or whatever.

Well, what's your name again?

I don't know what is my name?

Your name is Danny, Danny. This is the part of Danny. This is the part of the call where I ask you are you doing all right?

Am? I? I don't know, Bro.

Well, you're drunk at ten pm cleaning shit on the middle school floor.

That doesn't sound so good, bro.

But that's okay, that's okay. I don't think there's I don't think you should be ashamed.

Maybe a little bit, maybe a little bit.

I mean, how are are you doing? For real? You all right?

Hanging in there?

Okay?

How long have you been at this middle school for? Not today, but you know, in general, I think since July.

I think it started mid July. It's been a little bit of ago.

What made you go into this this career?

Well, I mean.

I was in college for like computer science and stuff, but then COVID happened, and I developed problems with substances, and then I didn't really finish that. So I'm here getting drunk of middle at ten pm.

Are you a bit and now are you a big? Are Do you get drunk every day?

No?

No, no, no way, no way.

Okay, all right, So it sounds like you have yourself some hard and fast rules. By the way you answer that question, we'll say Ben those times, I think, okay, all right, happens. Yeah. Are you still dealing with substance abuse issues? No?

I think I think I got them in check. I had a good nine month ramos. Nothing going on with any of that ship.

Okay, pretty cool? Yeah, all right, Well let's go back to the question of if you're doing okay and uh sure on paper, drunk.

On paper, out of middle.

School, cleaning up ship traditionally you know whatever. But that's I don't care. I don't really care about that. I mean, how do you feel? How do you feel? This is all all of this is subjective.

How do I I don't know how I feel, That's the thing.

I don't know.

Okay, are you how drunk are you right now?

Like?

Give me one to ten?

Oh, it's like a five. Not too bad.

That's not too bad. That's you really are kind of drunk out of middle school right now.

Yep, that's exactly That's exactly how it is.

Yeah, doesn't that does that like, uh impede your ability to like do you have a quota of like like stuff you got before you get out of there?

Yeah?

So it's there's two floors.

In a basement, but uh, the other cleaner called off today, so I got overtime. So I'm here till like two in the morning.

It's just you fuck it.

It's me and one other guy who's in the basement right now, and I'm up on the third floor, the second floor. However, you look at it.

Does he know that? Does he know that you are drunk talking to a gecko?

I don't know, but I think if he did, that be kind of funny.

You know, I'm not going to agree with that.

He's like fifty five years old. He goes to the bar every Thursdays. He might be drunk too, I don't know.

Well, Danny, uh, I don't like that name. I I well, I gave you the opportunity. I gave you the opportunity to give me a name.

Yeah, but I don't want to do that.

Well, then you'll get the name that I give.

To you, and I accept that.

I take that.

I'm Danny. Let me think here, all right, we'll ask you. I mean, i'll ask you this. At least you texted me. I do this thing where people text me and I call them back to you know, was there anything in particular that you wanted to talk about?

Not really, No, I honestly didn't really think you told me so. I think I texted you like all week. You're so good. I said, you have a picture of a cat or something. I think I didn't really think you'd call me.

Mm hmm.

What are you gonna do when you get off work?

What am I gonna do when I get off work?

I might, uh.

Probably smoke a little lead and put some counter strike. I think that sounds nice.

You know, you know, Danny, you're not doing too bad. You know you're not doing too bad.

Yeah, I guess so you're.

All right, you got you're you're all right.

I'm hanging in there.

I mean, don't overdo it.

Of course, No, no way, no way, I've already overdone it.

I'm done with that.

What's on the horizon for you, Danny.

Well, what is on the horizon for me?

I don't know.

I guess we'll see. I'm not sure.

Is did you go to this middle school when you were a kid?

I there was one. There's one closer to where I lived, and I went to that one instead of this one. So there's two of them when they merged into like a junior high.

Mm hmm, yeah, I didn't. You know what I'll do, Danny, I'll take I'll take a couple of questions from the chat if the chat has anything questions, if they were going to ask you, what is it you're drinking again?

I don't even want to say it because I don't want to give them, like any credit.

Someone asked, what's the craziest thing you found while cleaning up?

That's the thing is I used to work in an amusement park and I'd find some crazy ship there. I'd fucking peel raccoons off of the fucking roller coasters and ship. But this, this is kind of tame compared to that. Anything cool, like fucking I think the coolest thing I found was a gangar in a recycle tin.

You found a gangar? Like it was a car. It was a Pokemon car.

Pokemon. Yeah, that's probably the coolest thing I thought so far.

I think.

Multiple people are asking me if you ever flirt with the teachers.

No, the teachers hate me. This is funny. They don't like me at all. I go in their rooms and I clean up after all their kids, and they leave a fucking mass.

It's like, they leave, why do you Why do you think they hate you? They don't.

I say high to that.

I'm like, have a good night.

They don't say anything. They just walked by. And I'm not even drunk when I say that to them. I'll just say, hey, have a good night, but just leave.

Is there any school drama that we should know about.

Uh No. There's one kid that draws really cool shit on their desk, though, and it makes me sad when I have to lop it off. So they draw like cool like eyeballs and like Spike reps and shiit on like the corners of the best. That makes me sad.

Oh, well, let him know. He should just carve it in, because then you can't do anything about it.

I honestly, I thought about like leaving them a note and they're desk and be like Hey, dude, put this on paper. Bro, you're talented, you got like you're good at this. Don't don't make me wipe this off every night.

That's that'd be cool. That's like a cool that's what you'd be, like a fun drunk mentor guy.

I don't think I'm a very good mentor.

Well, Danny again, I know you don't have an answer to this question, but I hope you're doing all right.

I hope you are too.

Gech yeah, man, well this was fun. Is there anything else you want to say to the people of the computer before we go?

Uh? Yeah, don't try public restrooms? Like, what the fuck is your problem? Why do people do that? It's a fucking bathroom while you're throwing shit her out.

I get the feeling. I get the feeling that when you're done with your shift, you're about to go trash the fuck out of a Taco Bell bathroom.

No, I'm actually allergic to Taco Bell.

I can't eat that.

Have a good night, Danny, you too, get go.

This is nice. Thank you?

Hello, Hi, Hi, what's your name?

My name is Vanessa?

Vanessa? What's going on? How's life?

I'm gonna say right now, it's pretty good.

You might can you turn that off? I don't know what you're what you got going on back there?

But yeah, let me go find a private area. That way I can speak freely and I'll have people I bother me.

Yes, we must have this conversation in front of thousands of people privately, as long as.

I don't know any of buddy, So I'm alright with that. But here, I don't want people to know understandable I'm another plays music too, because I'm at the store right now too.

You're at the store, Yeah, what's store?

I'm at home depot? Okay, we like they're blasting everything.

Okay, why are you going? Where?

Where?

Where are we going to have this private conversation at home depot?

Oh, I'm going to go to the garden area. They don't have the music as well from what I can, Okay sense right now, but yeah, let's talk.

At the garden era of home era area of home depot. I don't know why that. I struggled so hard to say, Aria, just.

Now, yeah, where do you?

Where do I?

Where?

Where should I start? So I would say, about like three years ago, my husband and I separated kind of I left them pretty much in another country, and then I came back by myself. I took everything out of the house that was just mine, but I didn't like take anything of value. I just took my stuff. So for the longest time I had tried to work things out, he wasn't wanting to work things out, and then we were still kind of hooking up here and there, and then I found out Christmas Day that he got back

Like this was like is that a bad thing that I did?

Should I have not done it? Like so I just moved on and forget about it.

Okay, So I'm gonna I'm gonna I'm gonna recap this situation, so make sure I understand it. So you were married to this guy and then you you you divorced him. He divorced you.

Yeah, it was neutral at the time.

Okay, you got a divorce. He got back together with his uh first ex wife, yes, and then his ex wife who was then what what did he did? He remarry his first ex wife?

No, I think that's just dating or their like official, I haven't really hooked around.

And then well, and then so he moves in with her and her kids. Yes, and then you find out about this, so you send him a picture of your boobs pretty much, and then he's like, I like your boobs. And then you guys have sex in his car in the parking lot of a grocery store. Yeah, And then do you do you ever talk to him after that?

I did. I was like, hey, that was fun, hit me up if you want it, like if she doesn't meet your need, but obviously I was. I really didn't act on it afterwards. I was like, oh, I already had my fun, Like I'm fine. But then he had text me like a day, a week, two weeks later saying, hey, I got in trouble. She found out, and I was like panicking. I was like, oh crap, Like I shouldn't even care. But I guess later on. I talked to him.

And you're well, you said you're freaking out. What are you afraid is going to happen?

I think I was just like.

Oh, would she like come after me, try to fight me, like kind of things like that. Not that I would be afraid, but like, we do have a daughter in comment, so I didn't want her to take it out on my daughter, to be like, Oh, your mom's a whore. I'm gonna be super mean to you because you're because of Wait, so you.

Are right, so let me understand. So you oh so you have a kid? You have a kid with this guy? Yeah, and where's who's what's the deal with the kid? Who's the kid with.

We?

Trim or we have her half and half. So half of the week she's with me, half of the week he's with her or with him. So we have fifty fifty.

How old is this kid?

She is five?

Wow? Geez? And he had this and he has kids also with the woman.

Yeah, another kid in common. He is, I believe like maybe twelve.

Wow.

Yeah, kids are going.

These kids are going to have a whole podcast about all the shit you guys are doing when they get.

Older, right, Like hey, that kind of sounds like what's your face's voice?

Man?

All right?

So uh and are you what about are you You don't have a boyfriend or anything like that or or.

No, But I did recently talk to someone like and I'm kind of it's moving towards that. So eventually I did text them like a couple like a week ago, being like, hey, I don't want to continue this anymore. Not that it was, but I kind of just ended everything. And you can tell like his ego was a little bruised because he just replied, Okay, I think that's the best. Whereas before he would like write paragraphs. We would be

Now. But this guy, this guy is like he's kind of in your life forever no matter what, because you have a kid together.

Yeah, And that was my other thing. I'm like, do I really want to do this to where I have to. I'm sure eventually I would have to meet her. Do I want to have that awkwardness all the time, or do I want.

To be cordial with it?

Yeah? Yeah, Oh, I mean her finding out that you guys had sex is definitely going to make the pickups and draw off, the pickups and drop offs less enjoyable for everyone involved.

Yeah, but that's the other thing, Like he hasn't picked up our daughter like for the last year. He'll he'll send like his sister or somebody else. So I don't ever see him during drop off so or her as a matter of fact, because I had I'm like, I never want to see her ever again around my daughter. This far, he's respected it to a point. I don't know.

Love with you.

Well, I mean, fun, what is this? So you're asking, like I'm not I don't like I don't do uh, I don't do? Am I the asshole? I mean I guess what sometimes I do? But are you saying, like what should you do?

I guess my what I've had like conversations doing with like my therapist and my girlfriends are like.

Yeah, what'd your therapist have to say about this?

She was disappointed in me because she was like, you were doing so good. She's like, I understand, like he's gonna always be in your life, so it's kind of hard to just cut and dry, but you should have respected his and her relationship even though you don't like her, and you know, she kind of came in between you guys. But she's like, you're you. You should know better and you shouldn't have done that. But I understand.

That sounds like something a healthy professional would say.

Yeah, So she's like, are you going to continue it? I was like, no, I think I've had my one and done and I feel better about it. And I do secretly still want her to find out that we did that, but I'm not going to like force it or like send her textool, Well.

Hold on, why do you secretly why do you secretly want her to find out I think because.

Right when we divorced, like she right away like was hitting him up, trying to kind of wedge that wedge between us even bigger, kind of like oh, she's such a bitch this and not like, oh, you just are better, like I'll treat you better than the first time.

So I was like, like, what's so I.

Gotta, I gotta what's so cool about this guy that everyone wants to in his car?

I don't know. I mean, obviously say this it was good, but I don't think it at this point. I don't think it's worth my mental health because then afterwards I'd be crying. I'm like, I don't know why I like

All right, you talk to your therapist, your girlfriends with your girlfriends, say.

She was super mad. She's like, are you serious. You're such a dumb bitch. I don't know why you did that. So she wasn't happy that I did it, but she's like that I get it, but don't you're giving him a bigger head, Like you're giving him a bigger ego to know that he still has you wrapped around his finger.

How many kids are involved in this?

So between him and I, we have one daughter. Between him and the ex wife there is one in common. And then she remarried and had four other kids with the other ex husband, So there's a total of like six kids living under his roof.

Now that's a fucking whole mess, dude. Geez.

Yeah.

So I'm like, is this like a silver like clinging where I'm like, ah, I think I left during a good time. I'm not too old to find someone better for good, you know. But I was like, I don't know, I feel like maybe I shouldn't have done that because Karma's gonna buy me back in.

The ass.

And this other will like who's and the kid there are these are like kind of these are young like little kids?

Yeah, oh yeah, they're under like fifteen.

Well, I mean I wouldn't do it again. I don't think.

Yeah.

I hope that I can fight the urge to want to do it again, But so far I've been good. I think the other guy is kind of keeping me busy and wanting to stay away from that guy.

I mean, what do you what's your name, Vanessa? What do you want? What do you? What do you want Vanessa?

I think I would be they're all right, just to kind of put all this behind me and be like, yeah, I did that once I was stupid. I kind of blew his head up to where I was kind of teasing him and he knew that he still had me. But I mean, eventually I would like to be like, I don't know what I saw him, but be friendly, like a good cope partnership, rather than like I still hate his guts and the other girl, Like I want to be over the betrayal I felt when he got back with her.

M H.

I mean, I think if that's the goal, then yeah, If if that's the goal, I would I would stay away from the grocery store, parking lot.

And pet marks too.

Are you I don't know if we cut this part out of the call or not, but are you still at home depot.

Oh yeah, I'm just in the parking lot now, So I have like people walking by and they're like kind of staring, And then I'm watching people cut trees because they have the tree lot right now, what's the tree law? So here where i'm they don't have like we're like Oregon or like Washington where you can go out and cut your own tree, So they're already like pre cut to a point. We just trim They trim it down for you guys or like whoever buys them to make

Well I'm glad that we could end this very spicy story with the most boring thing ever.

Right Yeah.

I kind of thought that was like, uh, is this really just really happening? Like I'm freaking that right now.

Well, Vanessa, is there anything else that you want to say to the people of look or just about any of this stuff at all? Well, let's do this. Let me uh, let me see if the chat has any questions before we get out of here. Chat, any questions from the chat about uh, the ongoing affair or Oregon tree laws. We'll take questions about either one. Let's see here, how old is this person? They wanted how old you are, Vanessa?

I am thirty one, so I'm a little old to be doing this.

Someone wants to know how was Vanessa's relationship with her father.

I think, if anything, I've I think I have more mommy issues because I still actively wanted, like apparently I have like this codependency where I want to fix everything. But my dad was always around, like he's not a bad guy. Like so I don't know where, but it's like in the Hispanic culture, you have like that machismo and the like oh I'm bigger, better, So I think that's kind of where they're similar. But I have a good relationship with my dad.

Someone said, was the car sex even good?

Oh?

Yeah it was.

It was. We even had some guy that was cleaning there, like the parking lot, but he was trying to like he saw obviously like the car moving, so we kind of try to look and then I remember he's like I can't, and I'm like why. He's like, there's a guy looking into the car right now.

So I like peeked and I.

Was like, it's fine. You have blackout windows, like nobody's gonna.

Look like keep going, and then we have someone someone said, uh as an oregon asn't as an oregony in an oregony in. I love being able to cut my own Christmas trees.

I think that this whole tree lot defeats the whole purpose, like it robs you of that experience.

Is there anything else you want to say to the people of the computer before we go, Vanessa?

Uh? No, I just I appreciate you giving me the time to vent about everything and not making me feel such a shitty person. And everyone in the chat, I hope everyone kind of doesn't do what I do and keep moving forward instead of looking bad or back or trying to get revenge on something that really isn't worth it. I see.

Now, Well, go ahead and get yourself out of out of the you've spent You've spent far too much time in parking lots. Vanessa. You should go home.

Yeah, go home right now?

All right, take care of Vanessa, you buys. I wonder if the X shops at Low's.

Lyle.

Hello, is this really happening?

Thank you for calling me back?

Yeah? What's your what's your name?

Melissa?

What does z Melissa? Do you do? You is it with a Z. Is that do you pronounce the z?

Do you go?

Melissa?

So, I'm Mexican. And when you say with the accent, does the sounds you can hear the.

Am I allowed to do that? Or will the people get mad at me?

It's cultural appropriation if you do it.

No, of course, Malise, that was Italian.

Yeah, that's more Italian.

Mali is h bell la malis belle la mals cat got so malis ay ay aye? Melissa? What's up?

That's Italian? All right, I'm gonna stop you there.

That's going on?

All right?

Not much. I didn't think you're gonna call me back. Oh my god, I'm.

Shaking, Melissa, what's what's up? What do you want to talk about today?

Well, you know, I sent you a couple of text messages, so I don't know which one made you want to call me and you want to talk about our day? We can?

Oh?

You said, yeah, you sent me a text and you said I want to talk about your laugh?

Yes, Oh my god, wow, you have the cutest freaking laugh ever. I don't know if it's a giggle. I don't know if it's a legit laugh. I don't know if you're just it's a nervous little it's the best. So I think I got to figure out how to make you laugh.

Thanks. Well, that's cooet. I thought you thought this was that's very sweet. I thought it was going to be a bad thing. I thought you were going to say that it sounded bad.

I'll be I'll be anyone up who talks crap about the GEK.

You don't have to do that.

I take my cat on them.

Let's see. You also said, uh, I want to talk about my age gap relationship.

Oh, oh my god, my boyfriend's here too. He just made a bar face. Okay, everyone in the town.

Now hold on, now, hold on, now, hold on, hold on, hold on, Melissa. I'm very curious about this because it says here that you are twenty seven years old. Yeah, so I'm very curious. You're either dating an eighteen year old or a fifty three year old.

Oh that's that's close. Okay, those are your guesses. He is sixty four, a thirty seven year age gap.

End before.

Yes, I'm going to say this. Also, it's not a sugar baby relationship. That's what people always assume right away. But we've been together for four and a half years. I just I did the math the other day. Four and a half years together. We live together, we vacation together. He's met my family. I've met some of his family. Yeah, most of your family. Some baby say, Blake, Hey, what's that man?

We're just showing that's cool. I mean, how's it. How's it going? It sounds like it's going.

All right, amazing?

Actually, you know, we're both really lucky and blessed.

Yeah, and like some people look at us and me, like I've had people tell they'll say, like, oh, is that your dad or cool you're hanging out with your dad. It's always dad, And it's always awkward because it's like, no, what we do is not no, that's not no, it's but that's normally what people think. And I think one time he came to a sports practice of mine just to cheer me on, and nobody knew about him, and we kissed, and my coworker at first thought he was

Me about that what's sports practice or you know, I will I will say this. It's it doesn't sound good on paper when you say my sixty four year old boyfriend came to my sports practice.

Yeah agreed. Yeah, okay. So it's like at my job, we have uh they do these like outside of work things to get people to become friends. And one of the sports that they, I guess sponsor, yeah, team building. One of the team building sports a sponsor is called dragon boat. So it's like this big long boat with dragon a dragon head at the front and a dragontail at the end, and there's like twelve or ten people on the boat and you row in synchrony and you race.

Let's see if the chat has any questions for you. Sticky Greg wants to know what do you like about him.

His music taste immediately because I listened to like eighties music, old music, specifically eighties music, but all of his music tastes is my favorite music taste. I don't know. I wouldn't say all of it because you like jazz and I hate jazz. That's a controversial take because or a hot take because because of the jazz.

Rotten Rosen wants to know how is the sex?

Oh, Greg, I was hoping you would call me back before we started doing it because I was planning on it. I was like, if he calls me back and we're doing it, I don't know. I mean, it could be worse. It could be like that person who came when their grandpa died.

You know what I'd be like. I'd be like, like like the pet gecko in the room while you guys are doing it. You know what I mean?

Our cat likes to be in the room. Sometimes she jumps Ben and we have to kick her out.

A cruel world wants to know. How did you guys meet.

Oh that's actually a really cool story. I love telling the story, but I'll tell just the short version. I used to wear at the bank. He is a bank teller, and he would come in as one of the regular clients that came in like twice a week. That's why I met him. But we started talking because he was wearing an Iggy Pop shirt and I said, what do you know about Iggy Pop? You know, like one of those like metal alitis who says name three songs and Iggy Pop is his favorite artist.

Isn't that? Isn't that crazy? I don't know if he's here, but isn't isn't that crazy? That? Like your life is different because you wore a certain shirt one day. I really don't really think about that kind I mean that kind of shit's crazy, like people who you know meet because of things like that, or like I I've talked to I said this on the podcast before, but there's a h I knew a couple once who met on

Kind of like sometimes some things are meant to be. Is like I always think about it like this, Like the people who were supposed to be in the Twin Towers of nine to eleven happened, but their alarm didn't go off or they missed the bus, And it's like, you know, I think when things go wrong, sometimes they go wrong for good reasons. Or do you want our T shirt? That's like such a simple thing. And like now here we are almost five years later, and I could not imagine my life here five years ago.

Does he have any utters from any previous marriages or relationships or anything like that.

Yeah, he has one, and she doesn't particularly like me.

How old is she?

How old is she? She's thirty two, so she's older than I am. But she's never met me. He's offered to have her meet me multiple times. She's just uncomfortable with it. But like his other son, he has three kids, So I think the son that I've met is a middle child, right, Okay, he's a middle child, and he lives here where we live, and he helps me out a lot, like, or we talk a lot, like he hooked me up with mushrooms.

Oh yeah, so you so? You so he has he has three kids, yes, and two of them are cool with you and the other one's not.

Well the okay, so the daughter doesn't like me. The middle son, he's he likes me, yeah, and then the older son doesn't live here and I've never met him, but he knows of me. He's indifferent.

Okay what I mean? But so you have what the one son likes you? What's your relationship like with him?

I mean, he gives me drugs, so we're pretty cool. He's a car guy. He's like an anime weed, so he's really cool. No, Like, it's just it's just mushrooms. And you know, mushrooms aren't addictive, and they're just fun to do and like the controlled environment. And I only ever do them when I'm at home and my boyfriend is here to watch me, so that I don't i don't know, accidentally throw myself off the roof.

I asked this genuinely, Why why do you think that your the daughter doesn't like you personally?

My boyfriend's shrugging his arms. Personally, I think it's because she probably thinks that I'm just after his money, which is seeing that.

It was hold on. But I do, I do have to ask. I do have to ask, And again there's no judgment, but I am curious. Does he have a lot of money.

I'm gonna let him answer that.

He said he's well off. Yes, well it is, it is, okay, it is. It is kind of funny. And again there's no judgment, but it is kind of funny that you met at a bank.

Yeah, it is. I never thought that I would if I worked at the bank for four years, and never thought I would actually date an older guy or anyone who was who made more money than me, at least in that way, because I like, I can be honest, I make like forty thousand a year, which is very comfortable. That's a good amount to make. I think it's not half a million, But.

No, you want to make a million of years?

Another kid?

Yeah?

What?

What?

Other?

What?

Kid?

Oh?

Yeah? What?

What?

Uh?

What is?

What do you? What does he do?

He he's a glorified landlord. He owns warehouses and he runs them out to companies. So he's not like a slum lord. He takes care of his his tenants. Like when COVID was happening, he was letting people just pay what they could, or he was letting them like skip a month. You know, he was taking care of Does do.

You think he would let do you think he would rent out his warehouses to do like cool raves?

No, I don't want the lot of ability. No liability, he said, no for the liability otherwise, Yeah, I mean we've done punk rock shows before. Yeah, he said he's done punk rock shows at some of his warehouses before. But I feel like that's worse than a race.

But I knew all those people.

Oh but he knew all those people, so it's more like a personal party.

Someone in the chat. Someone in the chat wants to know what does your family think about their relationship.

So I have a younger sister, she's nineteen. She loves Blake. I'm sure she thinks it's weird at first. She thought it was weird at first. I have an older brother who he is not doing very well with his life. He's done a lot of drugs, so he's not in the right mindset. But like literally the other day he said that we were rich, and I mean compared to him, who was like basically living on the streets and going

By, you know. Somebody, somebody in the chat said that al Pacino is eighty three and his girlfriend is twenty nine.

That's a huge gap. Yeah, it is way more than us. But you know, like if it makes them happy, you know, and everybody is legal and consenting, nobody's getting hurt.

What does your dad think?

Oh, my dad is a piece of crap? Who is he was? He's not in my life that he was deported to Mexico, So he doesn't know as far as I know, but I don't care.

Well, huh, Melissa, right, yes, Lyle correct, Melissa is there? Well, you know, look here's I mean, you're you're twenty seven years old, you're older than I am. You're you can you can do whatever you want with your life.

Yeah, as long as I'm happy and not hurting anybody or murdering people specifically.

Do you think they would ever change that? Do you think they would ever make murder legal? Uh?

If the Purge came to life, Yeah, for one day maybe, But actually no, I don't think so. I mean, it is kind of legal if you're a rich person with the right contact.

I'm by the way, I'm you know, I'm I I I do I think that people should. I think people should do whatever they want to do with their lives, as long as they're not hurting anyone, you know, as long as they're not killing people. And I think that's a that's a pretty low bar, right, I mean, all you got to do is not kill anyone or steal stuff.

I think in this world the bar is pretty low.

It is, Yeah, especially for older guys.

That's what.

How you doing back? I don't even know, you know, what's his name?

I'm Blake.

How you doing, Blake?

I'm good, I'm great.

You know.

We just had a nice dinner, grilled up some tuna steaks and made some rice, and Melissa made a salad, and then all of a sudden I heard her freaking out in the other room because she missed her phone call an hour ago whenever that was because she's been waiting for your phone call forever forever. But we're great.

We're good.

Do you know, are you I assume that she's the one who's showed you this?

Yeah, yeah, no, this is not in my wheelhouse. But that's kind of the fun of our relationship. We share a lot of things that wouldn't necessarily cross over from an age perspective, but uh, it works out really well, and we're both really accepting of what goes on in each other's lives as far as me being an older person and her being a younger person. And we we like, you know, like Melissa said, we share a lot in

We're very, very blushed.

What do you what's the last concert you guys traveled around with to follow?

Can answer this? We went to see Iron Maiden in London.

Can tell.

Very cool?

Yeah, sixteen.

Yeah, we went to sixteen concerts this year. That was the last big travel show and we actually just got tickets to see them, to see Iron Maiden in New.

Zealand in a year from now, oh ship.

Yeah, and we're from a little town, little state of Oklahoma. You know, you know the biggest Republican state in America. Wait, now that's Texas.

It sounds well, it sounds like you both are killing it.

Yeah, we are. And you know what, Jack, you are too, Dave. I've seen people comment about you, know how you look sad and sometimes.

Why does that? What do you hold on done? What do you Who's common thing that I look sad?

The comments, the comment ters for comment ters, commenters.

Whatever, I'm not sad right now. I actually feel.

I have noticed you see them a lot happier lately, and I love that. I love to see you thriving. I haven't see the part of.

The little I'm well, here's I'll tell you this. I'm happy right now because I'm like live on my stream and I'm I feel awake and alert and I'm talking to people and stuff. But I'm gonnabout I'm gonna be really sad in about two or three hours probably.

Well.

The good thing of okay, it's not good that you're sad, but it's good that you feel emotions, because that means you're human and emotions pass, so you will be happy again, maybe tomorrow, but you'll be happy. And you just got to remember. What is it that the Karl Seton geisas we are all star stuff.

That's how amazing we are. We are all made out of stars. I don't know how to prove that, but the Carl Sagan guy says it, so it must be true.

Melisa, is there anything else you want to say to the people of the computer before we go.

Yes, Melissa would like to say comparison is a thief of joy. So just because your friends are making a million dollars doesn't mean that you should feel bad that you're not making a million dollars.

You got any bits like what isn't isn't that your boyfriend's name, Blake?

Blake?

Oh, be nice to people. It's not that hard.

Take care gang, Thank you, guys, to love you guys. Have fun at the Iron, have fun at Iron Maiden.

Hell Yeah, good night, bye chat bye.

Is my laugh really cute? I think it's more hold on, let me try to laugh hah ha ha ha. I don't know if that's cute. I think it's it's normal. I think it's a standard laugh. Hey, guys, it's Lyle here. I'm about to do some ad reads, but if you're a premium member of the podcast, you will not hear them. Premium members, or gek Legends, as I like to call them, get access to every episode of this podcast ad free.

What's up is this?

Caleb?

Yes, sir?

What's going on? Caleb?

Not much?

Man?

How you doing doing?

All right?

Dude? What is it you wanted to talk about today?

Well? I wanted to tell you about the time that me and my family took a bunch of acid and all had kind of a weird experience.

Now, I think this is an interesting thing, doing psychedelic drugs with your family, because it feels to me like, I mean, look, a lot of people have all sorts of different dynamics with their family. But I think doing acid with my mom or my dad, I actually think could be a really interesting experience, but it would be incredibly vulnerable. So I'm curious about how it went for you.

It was pretty vulnerable. The thing is like, like my dad sounds like that's plenty when he was you know, my age hadn't as much now that he's older. But so I didn't really like, I didn't have any hesitation at first, and me and myself, I'd done it plenty as well, So it didn't seem like something that would be that big of a deal, the thing. And it was on Christmas, so that just made it so much worse.

Whose idea was it to do this?

It was his idea. So this was his Christmas present? A tap of acid, like an eighth the weed and some mushrooms. M hmm to me, my two brothers, my stepmom, and.

Himself all that a tab of acid? Yes, And how was it? What did you guys do? Did you all just sit around and stare at each other?

No, I mean everyone kind of like did their own thing really.

Just around the house, just kind of hanging out around the house.

Yeah, pretty much like I was mainly chill with my brothers until like until everyone started peeking, and then shit just started going south?

How so.

It all it started with my dad, Like I could tell my dad was not handling himself very well, like he was. He was talking about like how he would had fucking died in a past life, and like he just started getting very agitated, and like I remember he was talking to my brother Tony and he was like he was like amping my brother Tony up, talking about how he's like like I can't remember what he said exactly, but I remember and telling him he was like a like a cat list like a bomb.

He was telling your brother Tony that he was a bomb.

Yes, Like he was like hyping him up, like getting him.

All rouled up in a good way or a bad.

Way, Uh, not a good way at all.

So, well, how did your brother react to that?

At first? He was like pacing around the house like freaking out. I could tell I could see on his face that he was not doing that good. He was not because once my dad started freaking him out, he couldn't. He wasn't handling his shit. And like acid is a drug that you have to be like, you have to set up good intention. You have to be in an an uplifting mood to have a good time. So if somebody's freaking out and like yelling at you, you're gonna have a bad time.

Why do you think your dad was yelling at your brother?

I don't know. He was going through something he kept He was like talking to me and my brother about how he had died in a past life and like we were all like experiencing his life.

Did he return to normal after the acid trip?

I don't. I don't know what normal is for him, but I would say, yes, who are.

You laughing with.

My girls friend?

Was she there?

No?

Okay? So once it was you said, it went south and your dad started yelling at your brother. I feel like, I'm HONESTID talking to you to be completely honest when when you know you don't have to apologize it wasn't It wasn't an insult. Maybe it came off that way. Maybe I'm a dick and if I and in that case, I'm sorry, But uh, why was your dad yelling at you? Like? What what happened after that was there was resolution to this conflict or the whole thing just stayed stiff and weird.

I get it gets worse. So after my brother Tony gets all amped up, like he disappears for a second and he walks downstairs and apparently he like he had an altercation with my step mom and she gets punched in the face.

Okay, your dad punched your step mom in the face while they were on acid together.

It was my brother that punched my step mom.

Why did your brother punch your step mom.

The explanation that he gave was that like he was envisioning our stepmom as his actual mother and that he was like taking out his emotions on her.

You know, I've I've only done mushrooms. I've never done acid before. I actually I have plans to do acid and like a couple of weeks and I'll report back on that. But it does acid really Like I don't know, when I took mushrooms, it didn't make me think the way I thought mushrooms would make you feel, like it make you feel like everything's a carnival or something like that.

It's like it's a slippery slope. So you have to, like, like I said, you have to say good intentions. You have to really hope for good things to happen, put yourself in a good setting. Like that was all things that didn't happen.

Okay, all right, and there was This is like the full house acid trip. There's other people and this is a step family. How many other people are tripping at this point?

So it's me, my two younger brothers, my dad, and my step mother.

Okay, my brother Tony.

Is an adopted brother. We adopted him, you know later when he was older.

Did anyone else freak out? No?

Me and my brother Javonne were kind of like the only people that could keep the situation level, Like I mean, as as much as we could.

Did you guys get Christmas presents? You know?

The day after I couldn't even look at my dad straight, like two days hm hm.

Hm hmm. This is man. I gotta tell you some shit like this would never happen to Hanukah. Never. Hey, we would never ever ever do acid at Hanukkah, although it would be kind of nice to do it and look at the lights.

That I thought, like we were looking at Christmas lights in my room, like, yeah, it's really it's very nice in theory.

It's nice in theory until your brother punches your step mom in the face and then the you know, she falls back and ruins the fruitcake.

That's the thing. It's it's Christmas night, so we're all fucking trying to have a good time. M like that.

Yeah, dude, this is crazy. Uh I uh are you are? Howard?

Do you?

Honestly? You sound I don't know if it's because and I mean this so genuinely, I'm not like coming at you. You sound very spacey about this whole thing. Is it because it's your like nervous talking or is it because you're like processing it all and trying to figure out what the hell happens, Like, what's what's going on with you?

Definitely more nervous talking.

Okay, all right. I didn't know if you were having like really complex internal feelings about this acid trip you did with your family on on Christmas.

No, it's been like three years. I've been able to process.

Okay. Oh so it's been three years. Do you still talk to your dad?

Oh for sure, yeah all the time.

How's he doing.

He's good, he's he's dead. I mean, he's a dad that does acid like he's never been quite a normal dad.

Mm hmm.

How about your mom, She's the exact opposite, pretty much.

Really no acid on the mom, No, step my, she's more like that. Okay, what about you? What's your d are you? Are you still? Are you doing acid every day? Are you on acid right now?

No?

No?

No, okay, I haven't taken acid since then.

Yeah. Yeah, that seems like a good place to stop.

Not saying that I wouldn't, but like, I know, I know my level like mcause, I I don't know. I've had my own crazy trips on acid before. Sure, the first time I've ever actually did it, I had a freaking terrible time. I took two tabs and freaked out myself.

What is it that made you want to do it? If you had such a terrible time, what was it that made you want to do it again with your whole family on Christmas?

Love of the game.

I don't.

Like getting sucked up.

I have a lot of respect for you, Caleb. No, I'm serious. I really do. I really do, I really do. I have a lot of respect for you. Man. You're keeping it. You're keeping it very cool today despite all just despite the weirdness of your life, you're keeping it real cool. I respect that about you. Well, what have we learned from this conversation? O Caleb? What do you think? What did? What do we all learn?

Probably don't do acid on Christmas with your family, and if you do, don't let your brother punch somebody.

That's all I needed to hear.

If you're beyond that, is there.

Anything else you want to say to the people of the computer before we go?

Caleb, keep on doing your thing, my man?

Hey, you too, man. Well, whatever your thing is right now, your thing just seems to be being cool. So keep doing that.

I appreciate it. Have a good night.

Take care Caleb. Now, actually, now that I'm thinking about it, acid honica sounds sick, Yo. You can eat these coins? That's crazy. Hello, folks, it's Lyle here. That's the end of this episode. But get this, I'm releasing a bonus episode this week. That's right, an entire extra hour of the podcast that you can listen to by becoming a premium member of Therapy Gecko over at Therapy Gecko dot

I uh just recently got out of jail.

About it year ago, I beat a fifteen to twenty five year case.

The charges that I got were like really big, I was.

On the news and everything you were on the news. Yeah, look, you do not have to tell me this, and I will only ask you once and you don't have to answer if you don't want to. But what happens?

So I tried to steal a fire truck and then I ran across the street and I went into somebody's hotel room.

And I like took their clothes, put their clothes on and try to change and stuff.

Then the cops came in and I.

Chased after them, trying to get them to shoot me. So I had aggravated burglary, aggravated arsons, depth of a vehicle over two hundred and fifty thousand dollars and then regular Burglary.

Mike, you're like auditioning for Grand Theft Auto six. Yeah.

I know.

If you want to hear this full conversation, you can sign up to become a premium member at therapy Gecko dot supercast dot com or find the link in the episode description that's therapy Gecko dot supercast dot com. All right, I have nothing else to say.

The rep Can goes on the line taking your phone calls every night.

The rep Can goes doing to night.

He's teaching you cloud in the middle of your life, but he's not really an expert.