“I’M A ZOOKEEPER”

Hello, Hi, What is your name?

My name is Shrimp.

Shrimp. What's up, Shrimp? How's life?

Life is good? I've been waiting to Collin for a while. I'm pretty excited.

Fucking hell yeah, man, here we are. We are doing the Gecko Show. This is gonna be a this is this is gonna be a very low key Gecko show. I don't know what the fuck I just said. I don't know what that means, but I.

Think they're all pretty low key.

You're right, That's why I that's I feel like they're all pretty low key. So I don't know why I specifically mentioned that this was going to be low key. I think what I here's what? Okay? Actually, I'm shrimp. I feel so hard I'm shrimp. I'm completely bullshitting you right now. I know exactly why I said what I just said, and I'm gonna explain to you why I

But it's totally fine and Lyle. You know, if you want to tap out any point, this is your show and you can do whatever you want, all right.

I appreciate you giving me permission to do that. I genuinely might take up on that. But for now, what's up, shrimp? What do you want to talk about today?

Not much?

You know, I'm a post grad and you know, living in this pretty much recession and just having a tough time with money, and you know, I'm just struggling along a little bit, but looking for some camaraderie. You know, I feel like I'm a good company on this podcast, so I'm just looking for maybe some advice. I hear you talking about iris and I'm already involved in all that, and I'm just like, what else can I do?

You know? You want? You want advice. You want financial advice.

I don't want financial advice. I think I'm just kind of like looking to moan a little bit about it's tough out here for the postgrads, and I'm just saying, y'all are alone.

How I have I have talked about iras on here a lot, haven't, I like a weird amount?

Yeah, yeah, And you you're pretty financially literate. It's actually pretty inspiring to hear about. I do take a lot of your advice.

From when I listened to Man, I gotta get a I gotta get in with Vanguard or something. Do you know what a high yield savings account is? I was talking to my friend the other day about about high yield savings accounts.

I do, and I'm you know, I had to actually pay a lot of taxes because I took money out of an IRA and that I was completely oblivious to the fact that you can't do that. And I was like, crap, So no, not.

IRN, not an IRA, A high yield savings account. God, this is exciting banter.

A high yield we can talk about something different.

Well, it's not yours, although that's not it's not your fault. I'm just I'm just snarking it up.

Uh No, I don't have a high yield savings account.

Unfortunately.

Anyway, what did you graduate with?

So?

I graduated with a degree in ecology and evolutionary biology.

That sounds real. How come you can get a job with that? You know what is annoying?

Job?

Okay, you have a job. You have a job. You have a job. I was about to say, if you you're a v you're a V tuber?

No, no, no, I'm a zoo keeper.

Oh I thought you were a v tuber.

I was like, all right, no, that would be worse. Oh god, I probably actually would make more money doing that, honestly.

I here's the thing is, if you graduate with something real, you deserve to make some amount of money. Like if you went if you go to school for like English or film or like theater arts. You know, it's if you and you have no money that makes sense. But if you if you went to it for like biology or chemistry or something, they should give you some money.

Yeah, I mean the unfortunately thaying you know, I wanted to be a zoo keeper, and I wanted to work with idotic cannibals, and you know, I've done that, and I love my job. And there's a passion tax. You know. I've heard other people that called in before I talk

You keep a zoo, I do I do.

For the sake of anonymity. I won't say what zoo, but it is an azy a zoo. And yeah, I take care of rhinos and giraffes and africans of stock.

What's an asy a zoo?

So asy a.

That's it's the Association of Using Aquariums. So that's like the highest, uh kind of governing body of animals and captivities.

Oh so you work at like a major zoo.

Yeah yeah, dude, hell yeah.

Do you like because zoos are interesting because they're like half like entertainment tourist attraction and half educational center.

Yeah yeah, And so I like initially wanted to get into this for the sake of conservation, and you know, saving species out in the wild. So a lot of like what we do in captivity translates to what they're doing for research and conservation stuff out in the wild. So I feel good about that.

But yeah, it's nice.

I also like getting to interact with the guests like day to day and like educating people. That's a funny part of my job.

Now, what's your favorite animal at the zoo?

I do love the rhinos. I can't lie. I'm a rhino girl.

What is it about the rhinos?

They're kind of just like big horses. They're super for like gentle, they love getting scripted, they train really well, and the crash that we have are just a munch of super sweet older folks and yeah, they're they're really good kids. I love them a lot.

M m.

Yeah.

But now, okay, so if you're not making that much money, now, is there like, uh, what's the career trajectory in zoom keeping? Can you over the years? Is it like a long term career field?

That's just the thing. It's like a lot of the people in my position have been in the field for fifteen years or so, and it's like kind of they're still kind of in the same position so unfortunate that I'm a younger keeper that I've gotten the privilege to kind of move pretty quickly ahead in their career as opposed to some other people. But I think I'm as of like seeing like, oh God, I don't know if

What's going on in uh US fish and Wildlife are they? Is that? Like you're do you work for the governments? Do you go fishing? What do you do?

Yeah, Honestly, I'm not like totally sure. I'm not totally well versed in that career. I don't know many people, if any, like that are part of it. But yeah, it is part of the government. So those are the people that kind of enforce like fishing allotments, stand force like hunting laws and that kind of thing, which you know, I didn't grow a cohunting or anything, but you know, I think it's for the sake of conservation of like you know, the United States sparks and wildlife, so you

What's an animal one world? What's an animal that most people don't know about? Like everyone knows about monkeys and giraffes, stuff like that. But what give us an animal where it's like I didn't even know. I thought, I give us an animal that'll make a think the animals.

That's a super good question. Let me think. Okay, I'll give you guys one animal that I'm about to get on grounds at my VIOO. It's called a diker. It's the d u I K E R. And there are antelope, yeah dyker, so yellow backed diker is one of those animals. They're really neat. They're kind of like little forest antelope that are just kind of strange. I recommend looking it up.

And now what do they eat?

And so you all sorts of brows, which is like trees and all these all sorts of vegs kind of similar to like a what a goat would eat you know, mm hm. But they're they're kind of neat.

Look do they get by? Do they get eaten by anything?

Yeah, so they can get eaten by like leopards. That's probably the most common thing. Earlier today I was doing exams on sable antelope. Those guys are pretty neat or my favorite, like weird marsupial is a water apossum. I've looked those up. They're pretty neat.

Would you rather have? All right, you can have a million dollars, but all dikers have to die? What would you have if you do? No?

I would not take my million dollars. The dikers can live.

What what about like? Uh, what about like a species of bug? Like something no one cares about? Like you like, like, is there any species of bug that you would eradicate from the world and you get a million dollars?

It's just super like simple answer, But mosquitoes can go. They don't serve any like ecological purpose. They're pretty they're pretty crappy. Bug.

Now, I now I'm going to fight you on this. What is what does it mean to serve an ecological purpose? Because fucking doesn't doesn't simply existing cause an ecological purpose.

That's a fair point. Yeah, I mean, I will say ecological purpose in the form I guess in terms of insects. That could be like digesting bacteria like the tritis, anything like that. Insects are pretty important in our world. But mosquitos genuinely don't serve any benefit. They don't enrich any of the the water supply. They aren't pollenizer pollinators, excuse me, like as an insect, they aren't really helping plants or animals in any way. They're just kind of vectors for disease.

So you'd get rid of all of them for a million dollars, I would.

There are people trying to figure out how to do that already. But yeah, I think they're it's kind of a a easy answer.

But yeah, I don't, I don't, I don't. I don't judge on this show, but I think that's pretty fucked up. What's your name again, Shrimp? Shrimp, Shrimp? Is there anything else you want to say to the people of the computer before we go?

It costs your dollars to be kind? Just be nice to people.

What if somebody asks you for what? Hold on? Hold on? Hold on? There have been many times where somebody asks me for a dollar and it would be nicer to give them the dollar, And sometimes I do. Sometimes I don't, but sometimes I do. But that in that situation, it doesn't cost zero dollars to be kind.

I guess that's fair.

Fine, So it costs, but there are I would rephrase what you said. I would say it costs zero dollars to be kind in certain situations, and in other situations it will cost more money.

That's a that's a fair point. I did get heckled by a musician holding a bucket recently for a dollar, and I digital kinds by giving him a dollar. And I guess that wasn't free.

So you're right, Thank you, shrimp.

You're welcome, lyle, Thank you.

I'm trying to think of more. Uh, what when else does it cost of Christmas? If you've given people Christmas presents, that's nice. That costs money. Yeah, there's no there's a lot of ways we're being kind costs money. I'm trying

Yeah? My name is Jay. How are you?

Jay? How am I? I'm actually doing all right today. I feel like actually I feel pretty stable. I feel pretty normal. I feel safe. Do you feel safe?

I do feel safe. I'm at home with my wife and children, and yeah, I feel I feel pretty safe. Yeah.

How long have you had a wife and child?

Well, I've been married for about five years and we just had our third kid on the twelfth of last month.

Three children. Let me ask you some is there anything like what how old were you when you how old were you when you had your first kid.

I was twenty four, about to turn twenty five.

Wow, okay, is your how significantly different is your life before you had kids to after?

Hmmm? I would I would say it's been a very post positive change. Before I had kids, I was just kind of running the mut and doing a bunch of drugs and not really caring. And now that I have kids, I'm stable and work a lot and have responsibility and I take that very seriously. So yeah, I would say it's pretty significant change.

What kind of drugs were you doing?

Oh man, a lot. I was drinking, smoking weed, snorting demali, cocaine, LSD, mushrooms. Yeah, just parting it up, you know.

And have you completely utterly ceased the drug use since you had your first kid or have you found some time?

You know?

Look, you don't want to be a piece of shit alcohol like that, but do you are you ever like, hey, honey, can you watch the kids for a weekend so I can do a bunch of drugs?

Definitely not. You know I stopped smoking weed about a year ago. Well, I can't say completely. I've smoked about four times since last March, and I drink pretty regularly. But nothing crazy. I'll drink you know, maybe four beers four to six beers a couple of times a night, I mean a couple of times weekly, so you know, nothing significant. But I just want to say really quick,

Wow, this is just awesome, dude. Thanks man.

Yeah, Bro, I enjoy your content. I love watching your YouTube videos. I listened to you at work all the time. I listened to your podcast daily. I just want to say that I just like, Bro, this is awesome. Like I can't believe I got connected to you.

Thank you. That makes me. That makes me feel really nice. I always, yeah, I get in my head all the time about like, oh, I don't know if people still listen to this show. I've been thinking about that, uh the entire time I've been doing it, even like I've six months in. I was like, I don't know how long this journey is gonna last. So to have someone listening for five years is very very nice. I appreciate that. What did you say your name is? Did I get your name?

Uh?

Yeah, let's just say my name is Jay Jay?

All right? Well interesting, Okay, So I have a lot of things about your life that I'm generally curious about. But if you've listened to the show for so long, I have to ask, is there anything that you always, as you've listened, thought that you might want to talk about when you got the chance to talk.

Yeah, definitely, Yeah, definitely. And I think talking about my life now was a good preface to what I would want to discuss if you would like to talk about it.

Yeah, hit me.

All right? Well, man, when I was fifteen, you know, I grew up in a pretty abusive household, both with my stepdad. My mom she wasn't too bad, but my stepdad was pretty bad and my dad was pretty bad. And I ran away from my mom's house and I was on the run for man, I don't know, like three months. I stopped going to school and when when they found me, they put me into like this. Uh man,

And how what that was? That was over the course of three months.

Well not the whole thing. So, like I said, I ran away when I was fifteen, and like, I was on the run for three months then they found me. I was in that place for like a week or two before me and this kid decided to run away, and I would say I was on the run at that point for another I don't know, a couple of weeks, maybe a month, and then, like I said, I got picked up by a cop. He realized who I was. He put me in this like like this kid's home

M M.

And did you end up going to college after this or did you? Did you graduate high school?

So I didn't graduate per se because no one would let me in. I ended up getting my ged and right now I am trying to complete my bachelor's What do you do for what I've been going So I worked for a landscaping company, so I do like a multitude of things there. I do like the fertilizing part of it. And then also over the winter when it's less busy, I'm pretty tech savvy. I built them a website, and like I said, I'm going to college and I'm

So, and what's the story of how you Is it your your wife right now? Is this the mother of all three of your kids?

Yep, yep, you married for five years.

What's the story of how you met her?

So we met on Facebook dating out of all of the things, and so she was about an hour away, and I went up and we kind of hit it off, and then we kept talking. And yeah, that's been the story ever since. We met the summer of twenty twenty and we had our first go ahead, go ahead, sorry, oh yeah, I was just gonna say we met the summer of twenty twenty, and we had our daughter the summer of twenty.

One, and no drugs you said, we're totally done with drugs now.

Oh yeah, yeah, like I said, since last March, I quote unquote, I guess have quit weed, but I've smoked four times in the past year. But like I said, I drink beer. But yeah, I don't do anything anymore. I take the responsibility of being a dad very seriously, and I bust my ass at work and try to get over time. And yeah, no drugs, man, no drugs. I take the responsibility of providing for my children very seriously.

How is how is that responsibility going for you?

Are you?

Are you enjoying it? Are you feeling fulfilled and happy and safe and all those good things?

Man? I mean, don't get me wrong, I am fulfilled. It's just a lot, especially you know, I have a four four year old, a two year old and a one month old, and it's it's like a circus. I love them a lot. It's just sometimes it's very stressful and and I don't I don't, I don't know how to express those feelings. It's like I am, I'm definitely fulfilled. I love them a lot. Sometimes though I wish we would have waited until we were a little more stable.

So but I bet it makes you. My understanding of it is that it puts you very much like in life. You know, there's not a lot of time to you know, fritter away thinking about bullshit when you have, you know, all that responsibility.

Yeah, definitely, Like I said, I work full time, and you know, I come home and my wife works nice because child cares insanely expensive, and so I come home and she leaves and I take care of them, and when I put them to bed, I do school. I'm in school full time. It's all online. Yeah, there's not a lot of time to to worry about bullshit. I guess you just got to do it. And I know at a certain point in my life financial stress will

What is your name again? I know you've made one up for me.

Oh it's Jay. Jay.

Well, thanks for sharing your life story. Jay is interesting. Yeah, I've been thinking a lot about like, uh, like kids and what life with kids would would look like. So it's definitely a subject that I'm quite fascinated in. But it seems across the board the people that I've talked to about it feel as though the responsibility that it gives them is like a good thing, uh and makes them,

Man, can I can I ask you a question?

Lyle?

Yeah, go ahead and hit me.

Like I said, I've listened to you forever, and I listened to like I listened to your podcast today and just like five minutes ago, I was watching you on YouTube. Do you have someone special in your life? Like, I don't hear anyone really asking about you.

People ask about me. People do ask about me.

Not very often though.

You look just at the beginning, Look at the beginning of this call, you asked me how I was doing. That Was that was asking about me?

Right? I? Yeah, I guess that was.

Asking about me. I feel like I volunteer a decent amount of maybe of I guess I volunteer a decent amount of I guess emotional information, uh like, less logistical information. But I'm not married. If that's what you're asking.

No, that's not I would. Do you have anyone special in your life?

Do I have anything that maybe that maybe.

You feel like, yeah, I could have kids, Yeah, I could spend forever with this person person.

No, I don't have anyone in my life that I'm at this moment, like ready to spend forever with.

Right, right.

That being being I think being married and having children would be nice, but I also feel it's something I would definitely like to do in my lifetime.

But I could see you being a great parent, just like like I don't know, like just listening to you and watching you all these years, like I feel like I know you in a sense even though we've never met, right, And I feel like you would be a very good parent, Like you're just like calm, collective, and I don't know, some of the insights you have have really helped you know in my life and them, I feel like you'd be a good parent, Lyle, I feel like you'd be a big ass dad.

You want to fucking be my son, I'll adopt you.

Hell yeah, even though I'm older than you.

Hell yeah, I'll be your son. I'll be your I'll be your son. You can be my son, and I'll be I'll be your father, and h your children. Your children could be my grandchildren and and that way, and then you can see. Then you can see for yourself whether or not I would be a good father. You can see for yourself. I'll feed you, I'll uh what

I don't think you want to see that, but hey, if you want to go that route, let's do it.

Bro, what's your day? Is there anything else you want to say to thee I'm sorry I forgot the fake name that you gave me again, but I'm bad with it. Is there anything else you want to say to the people of the computer Before we go?

I just want to say, like, this is awesome. I didn't expect to get through. I really enjoyed talking to you, and I hope you keep doing this podcast. I know you have you know your own doubts as a human, but Bro, just keep pushing forward. And like I I every every day when I get to work, I look on Spotify and see if a new podcast came out, and if it does, You're the first thing I listened to in the morning. So just just keep pushing. Bro.

Hey, thanks for having me in your ears. Man, I really appreciate it. I'll I'll keep seeing you around the universe of the computer, my friends. And congratulations on your beautiful life.

You know what. Congratulations on your beautiful life as well. Le.

Thank you, buddy. Hey, take care man, you too. That was a sweet guy. That was a nice guy. That's gonna be my son one day. I respect, respect having the responsibility to have kids. Do I have somebody special in my life?

You know?

I am? You know? Nah, you know whatever. All right, let's keep going. Hi.

What's your name, Darren?

Darren? What's up? Darren?

Isn't that much bro, It's a cloudy day. Decided to call you, and I'm surprised I got through.

Here we are, Darren. Here we are, Darren. Here we are. We're talking on a podcast cast listened to by at least one hundred people, which is pretty cool.

Yeah, that's pretty cool.

We're chatting, we're chatting. We're alive. What's up?

Oh?

Yeah, how's it going? Man, Let's talk.

It's going like I will say, life is going all right. But you know, I'm living life, you know, trying to have a good time. You know, we're here in the earth. Yeah, I mean, I decided to call you, and I'm the surprise that I got through. That's amazing. It's it's it's freaking amazing.

Did you have anything you want to talk about today, Darren? It's fine if not, we can just palor around.

Well, I guess I'll say light you. You know, well, what will you thinking about? What is life like? What? What's the point of living?

What is life? And what's the point of living? Those are great questions. I've been wrestling with a lot of those questions, and you know, Darren, I have realized something. I've realized something, Darren. Do you know what I've realized. I've realized that the questions, what's the point of living? What is life? You know? What happens after we die? What is consciousness? Why am I?

Me?

And other people are other people? I've been really I've just deeply been wrestling with a lot of these questions in kind of a scary existential way for about two months. It's been really scary and weird, and I felt like I've been in a Bizarrokohan Brothers movie or something, just by the nature of my own consciousness being a bit of a torment for it, and not because I'm dark and cool, but just because it's bizarre. It's a weird

What's the craziest thing.

They don't have an answer, Darren. They don't have an objective answer to any of these questions. So my dumb ass is not gonna get high and figure it out right now and probably not ever in my lifetime, and possibly not ever for the entirety that any life is ever any all things. And so you know what I'm gonna do in the face of that information, Darren. Yes, I'm gonna go on walks. I'm gonna hang out with my friends. I'm gonna make cool interesting things. I'm gonna

I could agree with that right now. I'm just you know, living life and putting putting my dog. You know it's a good thing. Life is, you know, having a good time. Life is living with your pets, Life is living good with your friends, and life is you know what, did whatever you want have a good time. You're hearing this thing called earth, and you know what make the best out of it?

Do you think the you know it's is when people would say before I went crazy, I people would say, oh, are we like the idea that we're living in a simulation that never made sense, That never made sense to me. And then lately the idea I've come around to it that we might be living in a simulation.

You might never know. We could have taken the rip red pill, blue pill sometime in our life, and you know, either we're living here in this life or we're living here in this simulation, but who knows. Man, it's it's it's like we're living in GTA. You know, life is fucking wild and things could happen left to right.

You ever seen The Truman Show?

Yes, I have, it's a good movie.

Yeah, I think about that ship not that like life's the TV show. But it's a very narcissistic thing to think. But there also is like weird, like your consciousness is the only consciousness that's verifiable. There's a word for this. I think I talked about this in the end of

It's like saying, like there's infinite stars. You know, each star has its own life, and we could be one of those stars in this infinite universe. You know, I'm a sucker for galaxies and space and stars like that. But you know I always look up into the sky. I'm like, you know what that's in the whole? Another planet when I'm thingling like that, and you know it could be different.

What planet do you want to visit the most?

To be honest, I do not know. But if is out there and the stars, sky space stuff like that, I would like to visit a planet where it's like, you know what, life is good. Life is better than what I'm living at.

Would you ever go to the Moon?

I would love to.

What would you want to do there?

Space walker?

You know, space jump and you know, just throw myself out there, levitate, you know, and just discover moon people out there. If it's possible.

Bro, if you were on the Moon, you would be the moon person.

Yeah, it's true. I'll be the only moon person on the Moon. On the Moon.

What is it?

Who are you? Darren? Who are you? What is your life like?

My life is I'm a guy who likes going to shows. That's to work day job from seven to three. And you know, enjoys a beer here and there. Why not enjoys a beer in there, but enjoys the beer every day. And just like pittying my dogs. You know, I'm a dog person. But it's just life. How life is treating me right now. I'm trying to make the best out of it.

Let me think, here, uh, what what is your day job?

I do landscaping?

Landscaping? Well, who is that in the background?

That was my best friend? Works with me too.

I like how you were about to say friend and you're like, no, no, no, I must clarify that this is my best friend.

Yeah, I have a lot. I have a lot of best friends from since school and they've been we've been you know, friends ever since then. I considered that I consider them as family best friends all that.

Do you do? You rank your friends in your head? Very often? Like oh, this is like, have do you ever could you tell me you're thanking of all your friends?

I used to back in my space days, you know, you could choose your top six, But nowadays it's just like, you know, they've been there for since I was since I was introduced to them, and you know they're all number one.

To be honest, that's really nice. There's none that you like. Are you friends with anyone that you're just kind of friends with because they've been around and you secretly hate them.

Yeah, there was one friend. I'm not sure if I could say is I'm not sure if I could.

Say his name, but I mean you've you physically can, but.

Idea, we we used to call him Chewbacca, but well not not Chewboka, but like more like Youbaca in the way. It was just a joke, a gag. I guess you could say he was he was a I guess say he was a good friend. It just you know, he he I guess he could He tried too much to be with us. And we can understand, like you try to hang out with us a lot, but we were just we weren't just feeling it with him. I mean, I mean, we we kept him around here and there, but he was a bit too much sometimes. And yeah,

What was it about him that that you felt mm hmmm.

He tried to kick it with us almost every day, but he always buys He always buy his pizza almost every day.

So wait is why? Why is is? Do you do you not want to hang out with your friends every day?

Well?

Yeah, I would, but sometimes there's days where he's like, you know, you try, you try to doing your own thing, and it's like, you know, you just want you just want to do your own thing, and you know, every other day hang out with your friends, but no, this guy, this guy used to fucking want to hang out every day of the week, every day of the month, like

You think do you think you're fun to hang out with twenty four to seven.

I wouldn't. I wouldn't say I'm not that fun from my perspective. I don't know how other how other people think about me, but I like to have a fun time, you know, I like to have a good time with people.

What do you what do you usually do when you're having a fun time?

You know, I try to drink with them, you have a good time, make jokes and and you know it's just well, I guess whatever, whatever every other people try to do, you know, just make it, make make make the whatever time is happening around you, guys the best time. You know, you can never know when when when it could be the last day you can hang out with them. And to me, it's always like yeah, like I'm happy to see you, but you know, just make the best out of it.

What's your name, Darren?

Yes?

Did you make a nice guy? Darren?

I don't see it. I feel like I don't feel like I'm the best guy. I just try to make the best of the best of everything.

Why do you what? What made you say that just now that you don't feel like you're the best guy?

Because I see other people that make the best of things with everyone else. And I feel like I'm used like a regular guy in this earst and I follow like to me, like like an example, Ozzy Osbourne, that guy, I wish I could have a life like him. You know, that guy's a fucking that guy. To me, he's a fucking legend, and I wish I could have a life like him. But not like a drug addict. But I used to have a life like him. But to me, I try to I try to live a life like

Why do you want to live like Ozzy Osbourne?

I look up I will say, I will look up to him. He's he's he's a god to me in a way, but not the not the drug addict part.

Okay, well then tell me, tell me what what parts do you do you desire for your life that you scraped from.

Like going going going shows and play in front of a lot of people. Because I'm I'm a musician myself. I play drums, and you know, I wish to be achieve that goal like all he had, I mean, he still has it. He's old, he's playing in his last show and fucking Birmingham, which I would wish to go. But yeah, it's not gonna. That's not gonna.

Birmingham, Alabama.

U k u k oh?

Yeah?

You ever been to the UK?

Uh? No? But I was planning to go to Dublin maybe later this year and like in just lie August, but I don't think that's gonna happen anymore. But maybe, I mean next year I'll plan to go to Europe because right now I'm just visiting Japan. That's you know, that's a fucking amazing spot to visit.

But you're in Japan right now?

No, no, no, I wish it was. But I've been there twice already.

Oh when are you going to Japan?

Hopefully in Halloween? Oh hopefully?

Why did you? Why did your Dublin trip get canceled?

What happened?

Why did your Dublin trip get canceled?

Well? Because the thing is is I'm in a financial spot. It's kind of crappy right now for me. But it just, uh, it just I'm not sure if I'm gonna have enough months to go out there, like do that your trip, then go and do that Japan trip. So I'm kind of in the pickle if debating and going in Europe or Japan. But for me, it's just I want to go to Japan more.

Yeah, I also want to get Japan more. Man, Japan rocks.

It's amazing. It's crazy because the first time I went, I like, when I went, I told myself, I'm here in Japan, a new country, like foreign to me. The first time I do is try to try a fucking Japanese resident out there. You know, I'm not gonna try any American restaurants that are out there. I'll try a Japanese restaurant out there. I went there fucking amazing, Like the guy gave me a bors steak, like a bor steak,

Mm hmm, that's really nice. You have friends in Tokyo.

Yeah, you can say friends in Tokyo. It's it's it's cool. It's it's fucking cool.

Darren. Is there anything else you want to say to the people of the computer before we go, I.

Will say, you know, Taro and listening, you know, I listen. I listen to you on on Spotify cool and on YouTube this and that. You know. I just you know, it's it's crazy to be on live right now. I never thought this is what happens my first time calling, and it's crazy. Also, I want to say to all the people that work in landscaping, like me, fucking victims up because it's a hard work out there. But yeah, I'm happy to be on therapy. Get go, I'm happy. You know, it's fucking amazing.

Thank you very much, Darren, have a good rest of the night.

I'll show you. Hold up, how are you doing? How are you?

How am I doing? How am I doing? Yeah? You want to know how I'm doing, Darren?

Yes, tell me, tell me how are you doing?

You want to know how I'm doing? You motherfucker. You want to know how I'm doing?

Yes? Yes?

All I want to do is eat Right now, I'm just like, all I want to do? Are you? I don't know where my ambition went. I mean, it's still here. I'm very ambitious mentally, but physically I'm just oh my god, all I want to do is like, fuck dude, right now, my like, if I could do any you know, you know the question if you can wave a magic wand and me doing anything with your life? Yeah, I've been thinking, and you know a lot of throughout my life, A

You know what, goot go, I con vision that. I hope you do that, you know, live your best life, and you know I'll help you eat those two points of ice and you better fucking enjoy man, like enjoy it. Fucking enjoy it like enjoy man, You're gonna love it.

So you're a great guy, Darren, You're great. I'm sorry I forgot your name, but and I don't even You're just right now. You're a chill, fucking guy, Darren.

Hey, So hope hopefully I can call you again. You know, I hope to talk to you again. And you know I love listening to your podcast. I listened to I listened to you in Spotify YouTube, like I said, and you know, hopefully, hopefully in the future again another call with you, and you know I'll be fantastic talking to you.

Again, Darren, Keep living your best life. Man, all right, You're you're something special.

YouTube therapy, get go.

I love you, man, love it too, Darren. Bye bye. But Darren's a bad influence. He's a He's a super cool guy. Though he's a bad influence. There's no way I should eat two fucking pints of Ben and Jerry's ice cream. But he's a good guy. I really did feel that way talking to him. He really seemed like it just a fucking Sometimes you just meet a person or you chat with them and they're and You're just like, what a fucking real ass motherfucker. He just felt that way.

Andrea?

Andrea? What's up Andrea? How is life going?

Uh?

It's going good. Yeah. I just came back from a target with my mom.

Okay, how old are you? Andrea four? How was going to target with your mom?

It was good. Yeah, I'm big into Quarterzip, so I got a new Quarterzip. I was like, nothing to say because I didn't expect that you can get on.

Going to target with your mom is a psychedelic experience. A lot of the things that when I was a kid bored me. I've come to realize are very very psychedelic experiences, like sitting at the sitting at the dinner table with your mom. It's psychedelic. You're on a planet. You're in the illusion of whatever I'm having. You know, you're you can have a sober psychedelic experience being a target with your mom. You can look around and go, what the fuck is all this? What am I? What

No?

I mean I was. She was. We were at five guys before I came home, and she was just talking to me and I just like was listening, and I just like was looking in her eyes, and I was like, wow, Like she's a lot older than she was when I was like twelve, and she like physically looks like older, not bad, but like she just obviously looks older than from when I was younger like that, and that kind of like hit.

But yeah, yeah, I've had that moment too, because I've had that moment too, because I've you know, I don't live in the same city as my parents, but I living near them, but every time I go back to see them, they look older. Yeah.

Yeah, yeah. Not to change the subject, but when you were doing the when you were doing the get mail thing, which is like my my favorite thing. I sent you an email back in like January. But aside from like everything in the body of it, my my ps was, what is your favorite Celsius flavor?

Oh? Did I answer?

No, you didn't. It was very heartbreaking.

Listen, what is my favorite Celsius flavor depends on what kind of mood I'm in. Let me tell you a brief Let me tell you a brief story. It's it's such a brief story. It's like a one sentence story. It's not even a story. I was. I was got. I was like really depressed for like a few days in a row, and I just couldn't I couldn't be here. I couldn't like be present in the universe. I was too locked into my brain and thoughts in a bad way. And I went to the grocery store. And I went

I I always have a fridge stock to Celsius. That is that I'm I almost tell like every flavor of it. So that's why I felt qualified enough to ask the questions.

I just felt in that moment. I was like, ooh, play a vibe and I was like, oh, there, I am, I'm back here.

I'm no, I'm not a big fan of Pina Colada, so I can't I can't really vibe with you there.

Ah, yeah, motherfucker, Okay, what's yours?

Well, the one nutrition store near me has all the Celsius flavors there, and they have like a cherry coke flavor, and I feel like a lot of places can't mess up coke flavor. That one's pretty good. Other than that, other than that, they haven't the Arctic vibe. Pretty basic flavor, but it's pretty good.

I like the Arctic Vibe. I like that. By the way, this is not a sponsored Celsius thing. I just I genuinely love Celsi. I was looking at yeah. By the way, I also I love the cherry coke one, the coke one. If I'm in like a no nonsense, no bullshit, I am here to get some shit done mode. I just get orange, no vibe, no prickly cactus, Sherbert Cola, whatever, bullshit orange, you know, regular orange. I had a grape one the other day. It sent me crazy. I drank

Well yeah, what an absolute honor to receive a video like that.

Yeah, so now it just makes you feel like like like God, you know, you can do anything absolutely, Yeah, go ahead and go ahead.

I was just gonna say, just another thing I mentioned in the email was my my boyfriend actually told me about your podcast, uh last year, and I've just been listening to it like almost every day.

Oh, yas man.

Yeah, yeah, it's good, good one. Yeah.

A lot of people have told me that they fall asleep to the podcast.

Oh no, no, I'm active.

I am very.

Active and cool, cool, cool. I've become I've recently become a fall asleep to the TV guy. That's what's going on in my life. It's actually a great development.

Man.

I look forward every night. I put on four hours of Game Boy Advance Game Trivia and fucking knocks me right out.

It's the best we've been doing in pop culture. Jeopardy with Colin Jost.

Oh that's nice.

Yeah.

I don't know that guy, but he's probably what do you think he's like in real life?

Probably sits on the toilet after a great Celsius just sings song.

I don't know. He seems like a he seems like a he seems like a pretty together guy. He seems like like you go to his house and he has like a bowl of fruit on a on a desk, and like he goes, he goes, oh, that's a great idea, and then he like does it?

You know?

And then he's like he just seems like a normal guy. I don't know. I don't know him, but he seems like he has like knives in his house and he uses him to cut like lettuce.

Are you just going based off of just his name? Like you don't know who this guy is at all.

I know who Colin just is.

Oh, oh yeah, he's like on I just know him on there, but I know he's like snl or whatever.

Yeah, where do we Where do you think we go when we die?

Where do we go when we die? I'm not like super religious or anything. I think that.

We go to.

The sky and we just are in another universe and we just move can eat whatever and do whatever. You were just talking to the one guy before, and you, like you said something about like what's one thing that you wish you could be doing or whatever right now? And you said about eating the ice cream. But then I was thinking sometimes the same lines as that, almost but like being able to eat but there's like no calories involved.

Yeah, that could be awesome. Oh my god, yeah, there's no calie. It just makes it as if I mean, I mean, you can do that. It's called binging and purging, but it's not recommended.

Yeah, yeah, no, you're pro will not be happy afterwards.

Yeah, doctors do not recommend, but I mean it is physically possible.

What's your name again, Andrea?

Andrea, Andrew. We've been talking for about eleven minutes right now, and I was about to end our conversation, but I just want to check in with you. Do you feel like you got everything that you desired from this conversation and is there anything I can do to make this conversation a better experience for you before we do leave?

What was I going to talk to you a little bit more. But you know, I'm just happy that I was able to get on in the first place.

We can talk, is there what do you want to talk about?

Oh?

No, like just just shooting the ship. It was just cool that they about to even talk to you.

Let me think, let me think of one more thing we can talk about before we go.

Oh, well, I guess if you I guess if you like read my email. Then in the next in the next gek mail.

Oh did you send another email?

No, I didn't send another one. It's just back in January.

Oh wait, did I ever read your email?

No?

You never did.

Oh what was in the email?

Uh?

I talked about like my school? No, no, so long ago. Yeah, I talked about school. But uh, if you want to go, I don't. I don't want to keep you on.

You can talk about school. We got we're chilling.

Sure, Yeah, okay, I mean yeah, I mean I just ended my semester.

Uh.

Basically the whole thing was that like I was just like I got accepted into like this national uh this National Society for Radiology, And I just said in the email that I don't know, I just didn't feel like I was the right person for the pick.

M hm, why not?

I don't know, because, uh, there's a lot of people in my program. Well, my program's like very strict, so like they only pick twenty people out of like hundreds of applicants, and I was one of the people to get picked for that, and like that's cool at all. It's like based off of like your grades and like how you interview with like all the teachers and stuff, and there's like six teachers that you interview with, and you had to do like this professional points thing at

So that's okay that you got a thing they don't care that much about.

Yeah, I guess. I guess it was just like a mental thing, like I don't know, like, yeah, I get it that.

Good.

Listen listen, listen, listen. It's all it's all rigged. It's all rigged. You know, you know it's all rigged. It's all rigged. Sometimes it's rigged in your favor. Sometimes it's rigged against your favor, but it is all rigged. And uh, if it's rigged in your favor, you know, it's not like you took away something from someone else.

Maybe yeah, yeah, I feel it.

So you wrote all that, and then what is your favorite Selseia's flavor?

Essentially? Yeah, something like that, And then I that I just like, uh, met you for my boyfriend. Uh, he used to listen to you a lot, I guess when he was working at a foundry.

What's he doing now, who's he listened to?

Who's he listened to?

Now?

Uh?

No one really? I mean he's watching your stream as you're talking to me.

Okay, he's not like, uh, he's not like listening to the Bad Friends podcast or something.

No, I don't know if you listen to anybody else. No, he doesn't get to listen to anybody at his new job like he did in the old one.

Oh man, can you tell me?

I said, Hi, he's so highs So what's while?

I like this guy?

Like?

I like this guy. This guy's a cool guy. I'm glad that you guys are dating.

Yeah, he's a cool guys.

Chi guy.

What's your name again, Andrea?

Andrea? Yeah, Andrea? Is there anything else you want to say to the people of the computer before we go?

Yeah, if you are trying to get into the stream, uh, call all at minimum?

You want.

Good luck on all of your life endeavors.

Andrea, You two wiles like you're talking.

But what is your name? Cowboy?

My name is Lilith.

Lilith, Yes, Lilith. Where are you calling from? Lilith?

And I'm calling from Germany?

Ah, yes, Germany. What part did you wear in Germany?

I'm pretty much in the middle, like near Frankfurt. You might have heard of it. It's like the Silicon Valley of Germany.

Frankfurt is the Silicon Valley of Germany.

Maybe I don't really know what the Silicon Valley.

Is, so.

I respect that. I also use U metaphors and things that I don't know what the hell they mean, and I've gotten I've gotten a lot of mileage off of people not prodding me further on what I mean when I say certain things because I would not be able to answer them at all.

It works a lot like when you're talking to someone who maybe doesn't really question what you're saying, and it works, But when someone called me out can be really embarrassing.

Aren't those the best kinds of people?

Though?

I fucking hate when you start like talking to somebody and you're saying things and they ask you to elaborate on them. I hate talking to those ye people. I want somebody who just will let me say a bunch of nonsense to them that may or may not make sense and just goes yeah, totally, absolutely. You know, those are the best kinds of people. It's people who they don't They don't go what do you mean by Rhode Island? Is the is the Luxembourg of America? You know? I

Life is pretty good right now actually, but something really crazy happened to me recently. Name so, I have I have one ex boyfriend and right now I actually live with my second every boyfriend in an apartment. But I have one ex boyfriend and I this crazy story happened recently, and I'm trying to think of a fake name for

You know.

We were at this birthday party and then my ex boyfriend also showed up and he kind of invited himself, so he was also there. And then I had like like eight beers, and I don't know, I was having fun.

I'm familiar with it.

Okay, okay.

So he had he had ray on his T shirt like the blue haired girl who's who's not really real, and then like a like a funny I don't know, like a funny phrase on the T shirt as well, and I was it was really awkward because it was just the two of us, and I was like, oh, nice shirt, and he was he was being stupid and I don't know, talking talking to me, but I didn't

Well, did you guys just get the same tattoo kind of coincidentally?

No, I've had this tattoo for many, many years, and he knew I had it for years. It was my second tattoo, I think, And yeah, I think. I Also I made him watch the anime because I was always talking about it and he didn't really know it before.

Yeah, did did he like when? When when he showed it to did he say that he got it because of you?

No?

Actually he said that he was gonna get some other stuff tattooed on his right under arm. And I talked to some of his friends about it, and I even texted his mom because I was really creeped out, and I mean, I don't want this guy to crash out. I want him to be well. And so this did seem like what a well person would do to me, and so and so I texted his mom and he and now she texted me back and said and he didn't do it too to piss me off, and that he's been wanting that tattoo for a long time and

When you become an animal, yeah, not like you like.

In the head, you know, how how.

Have you become? What happens to you when you become an animal?

When I have when I when I drink wine, Yeah, when when I drink wine, I go a little crazy, you know.

Interesting, and then I then I start Then I start going up to guys with guitars and tell them to play a song.

And then I sing, but I can't really sing, or I start crying and sit somewhere, and or start showing people my tattoos and explaining the whole story of the tattoo. I guess that's not that crazy.

But who are you, Lilis? What's what are you doing in the middle of Germany?

I just live here. I just live normal life like everybody else.

Do you What do you dream of.

I dream of I dream of a quiet world where I don't know where everybody is just not afraid to be himself. That's so boring, that's so who doesn't dream of that?

But there's a lot of people who don't dream of that. Hitler didn't dream of Uh yeah, I don't think. I don't think that the president of McDonald's dreams of that. I don't think Michael Jordan dreams of that. I think he's busy doing like brand deals and running companies and stuffy whoever who's in charge of Apple Computers. That guy, he doesn't dream of that. Yeah, yeah, there's plenty of people who don't dream of that. They're thinking about other stuff.

Dream of wild horses.

Yes, have you seen a lot of wild horses lately?

M if I dream? No, I've never seen a wild horse, but I would like to very much.

Do they have those in They have horses in Germany.

Right, not wild horses. They have lots of horses on like enclosures, but not wild horses.

Sadly, it's a whole ass country. They don't have any horses like wild horses. It's not like one.

No, we don't even have natural lawns. I don't even know the English word force, like.

Just wild grass waste force.

No, we have forests. We have lots of forests. Most of them are artificial though. Visa is the German word for just like wild grown lawn, grasp with flowers and FeAs. We barely have that. We only have like fields.

It's really sad, lilis, Yes, where do we go when we die?

Where do we go when we die? Fuck around and find out? I don't know what kind of question is that?

What kind of question is it?

Yes?

You know, I thought we established at the beginning of this conversation that it's not good to ask people what they mean by things.

Oh my god, I'm so sorry.

You're right, I forget, I apologize, don't worry about it, loves.

Yes.

Is there anything else you want to say to the people as the computer before we go?

M instead of instead of getting getting something tattooed to creep or to piss someone off, you should do something else, like throw eggs at their house or something like that. So don't do that. And then secondly, mhm, lift free lifts so freely that you're existence is an act of rebellion or whatever. That one guy.

Said, thank you for calling Lilith, thank you for answering. I don't watch anime. That's all nerd shit. No, I've did I watch an anime recently? What did I watch recently? I watched Sokka Moto Days. I liked that one. I'm gonna watch I'm gonna start watching Scavenger Rain. I don't know if that counts as anime though I like animation. No, I don't know. This is anime I watched when I was in middle school. It was called Sergeant Frog. The main character. If you look this up, it's called Sergeant

I guess.

I guess all podcasts are kind of chit chats, except except like the Batman ones, where they like do like a dramatization of Batman. Those aren't chit chats. Those are like, tell a story about Batman. Do I have anything else to say? I feel like I do. Thanks for listening. I say that every time, though, What more do I have to say? The more I think, the more I the older I get and the more I experience and the more I learn, the more I I actually I think. The older I get, the more futile it feels to

Ka.

It goes on the line, taking your phone calls every night. The beacon goes to his hide. You're just teaching you a loud your line.

Money's not really an expert.