I'm a phone sex operator, and basically people just like pay per minute to like talk on the phone basically about whatever they want. And sometimes it's like old people who don't know how to use computers, so they just call the like they'll see like a Raccy commercial or something even like call the number.
Yeah, I was about to say when I watched like South Park or something like that, like there's always the commercial for the phone sex thing. But every time I see that, I'm like, I feel like anyone who Luna, Hello Luna. It says here that you are a phone sex operator, and you think it would be cool to see what I think about that profession? Well, who cares what I thought? How did you get into this profession?
Well? Well, okay, so I've been a sex worker for like two years now, and I want to say, like business wasn't really booming for me. So I watched some videos with some like veteran sex workers and we're like, oh, you got to you got to get into phone sex. You got to get into phone sex. And I was like, well, I do have this like kind of like soft breathy voice, so it would be interesting. And so I went on.
You go online basically and you just kind of like sign up and terify your ID and blah blah blah, fill out a W two and then people pay you to talk on the phone with them.
Interesting, So is this is this like, uh, what kind of sex work were you doing before? Was it like only fans? Was there were you at the strip club? What was the what was the nature of the game?
I wish I wish I could do. I wish I could were at a strip club. I was doing only fans, and I was also selling like content outside of the platform as well.
So the phone sex thing, do you not do that through only fans? Is that like a different service or something.
No, it's it's a completely different service. Actually, it's like it's more of a kind of like an archaic form of sex work, like an archaic form of online sex work, if you will. It's like it came before, like only fans and stuff, and basically people just like pay per minute to like talk on the phone basically about whatever
they want. And sometimes it's like old people who don't know how to use computers, so they just call the like they'll see like a racy commercial or something even like call the number.
Yeah, I was about to say, when I watched like South Park or something like that, Like there's always the commercial for the phone sex thing. But every time I see that, I'm like, I feel like anyone who like wants to do something like that, they have whatever, the only fans chat rooms and all that stuff. I feel like, who's calling the phone number they see on TV? But I guess I guess that's that's a demographics. Older people who don't know how to use the computer.
Yeah, you'd be surprised. You'd be surprised at how like how many people that you know how to work a phone will that don't know how to work a computer will call the lines. I get people, and you know, when our college finished, I'm like, well, like do you have an email? Can I like email you something racy or whatever? And they'll be like, I don't have an email? Like how do you not have an email?
What do they do? They get you your their physical address to like mail them a letter or something like that.
Oh my god.
No.
Actually, sometimes customers are like here, this is my number, and they'll like stay out loud, They're like text me. I'm like, I'm not going to text you. I can't call you. Like like people will try to give me their personal information over the phone, and I'm like, they're typically older too, and I'm like, why are you giving some random girl that you've called on a number you saw on a television your home address or like your personal phone number.
I no, I wish they seem to trust you.
It surprisingly people, So does.
Does anyone ask you for anything unconventional? Or is it? Like you know, I feel like with phone sex, how you have to be really creative, Like you have to be way more creative with phone sex than with actual sex, because you got to be like a p oh oh it dude. Like with real sex, you just you put you know, everything is very physical, it's it's it's there, it's show, don't tell. But you know, phone sex it's all in the description and the imagination requires far more creativity than actual sex.
Yes, and it has Actually as a sex worker, it has furthered my skill because now I sure I can get the job done without even showing you know, any and even my face. Yeah, when I when I'm on the phone, sometimes I have the souris open for like younger customers because well, I don't want to put this into like a stereotype, but This is just from my experience. Older customers, if you say anything that's like slang for like, if you say like it, Dad gets the job done,
it's satisfied. But for younger customers, typically in their thirties maybe forties, you have to be really really really descriptive and like really raunchy with them because they're just like so desensitized.
So you when you say when you say, you can just say tits and it gets the job done for an older person, Like what do you write? Do you just say? Like I mean what I what do you? What do you even say to these people? Like how does it? I can't even think of, like how you would start?
I mean I want to keep everything as PG as possible because I would hate to like shadow band you or anything. But I have this one customer.
We can cuss, right, you can say whatever you wants.
Okay, I just yeah, okay. I have this small customer and he's obviously like in hiss, like seventies eighties, like probably bedraded, like he he just sounds old. I can tell and basically our entire well, okay, I guess I'll tell you how Like I typically start off, I'm like, hello, this is Luna, and they'll typically tell me like, you know, hey saw your photo blah blah blah, or you know, heard your greeting, and I'll just kind of nonchalantly say, well, like,
what do you want to do tonight? What are you into? If it's a new customer, but if it's a regular I kind of know what they already want. We already get into it, and then based on like their reactions to things and what they say to me, I can kind of fine tune it and like give them the experience that they fully want. But typically in the beginning, it's like, hey, how are you how are you doing?
I'm doing great, and then we just kind of get into it, or if they have trouble, like some people are a little shy, I'll just kind of slowly ease into it and then they get you know, they get really into it in the end.
So tell me, I'm curious, are you you know? I guess I guess not even just phone sex, but sex work in general. Do you enjoy the profession itself or do are you just sort of doing it as a way to make money and you have sort of something else that you intend to pursue In addition to that.
Mm hmm, well for now, I guess uh, okay, Well, originally I did start sex work for just because I needed funds, but then I actually really started to enjoy it, and once I got into phone sex, I learned that I actually really really love phone sex. It's kind of okay, don't take that the wrong way, but it's kind of like what you do, you know, I kind of I sit.
On the phone. There's a amount of similarities here, I will admit.
That, yeah, And you know, it's just it's kind of the same thing. I get to talk to all different kinds of people, and sometimes it is It's just sometimes it's people who are actually just lonely and just want to talk or like talk like vent about their day.
Right.
Do you have a lot of people who are just talking about like their day and it doesn't even get sexual.
Yeah, And honestly, it kind of feels weird because I'm I'm so used to being like creative on the spot and saying like really really gnarly words, and they just want to talk about like what they bought at the grocery store, and I'm like, I like have to forciately tone myself down for those people.
So you're enjoying getting to so I saw, yeah, I guess. I mean there is a lot of similarities between what we do. We get to talk to a lot of different people. It sounds about a lot of different miscellaneous things. Do phone sex, I do phone gets?
Uh?
Do you so?
So?
Okay, So now since starting phone sex uh for work, do you find in your personal sex life to be doing a lot more phone stuff?
Actually no, I don't actually part It's okay, it's it's not really personally phone sex isn't something that like carries me on. I prefer you know, physical like in real life sex. I will say that it does make the dirty talk in the bedroom a lot more racy and creative just because of the you know, the vernacular that I picked up from being on the lines with people. So it's made me successful in the bedroom, and it has also made me successful in like like sexting people
or like on dates when I'm like flirting. Yeah, it makes me successful with flirting in real life. But I don't I don't have like actual phone sex with people in my in my real life.
Well, you know the reason why I asked you the question of like, you know, I know, you said you started it for money, but is it, like, you know, is it just for money? Are you enjoying it?
Is that?
Because okay, it sounds like you're very good at it. And I feel like people, no matter what the thing is, get enjoyment from doing things that they are good at and competent that because it gives you confidence to know that you're good at something. Yeah, like, there's there's a lot to there's a lot of what you know, pride and happiness to be gained there with you know that itself.
Oh yeah, definitely mm hmm.
Do you have anything else that you that you aspire aspire to do?
M hm oh yeah, I mean I do have bigger dreams. I am a pretty I'm a pretty decent artist, and I like to sew and stuff. So I've been thinking about maybe going to fashion school or going to art school as well. But typically, I mean not typically financially wise. I think I already have like a decent job that I really really like. So maybe on the side, for like shits and giggles, I might sell my art eventually.
Do you have any advice to people out there who might be listening who, because I've I've been in this situation before, where like I've you know, been whatever with someone a dirty texting thing, and I don't know what, I don't know what the hell to say. I don't there's only like, there's only like really five things you can do, and I'm not very creative. What do you have for people like that? People who are listening? How can we be more creative in our phone and texting sex lives?
Well, let's see, definitely go on with this surus. Wait, actually you use.
A the sor you're on there on the phone sex line with a thesaurus in front of you.
Actually, I recently discovered this better website. It's called I think it's called word Hippo. That's a better sours.
You're on word hippo while you're doing the phone sex.
Yes, because sometimes sometimes it's like, oh, I don't want to say that word over and over and over again, so you want to say something new and right.
That's you can only say tits like twice before the whole magic is gone. You can't how many times can you say tests? Or how many words are there for cock? You starting shoulders and elbows and stuff. You're getting twisted, I know.
But the biggest thing is adjectives. Adjectives. Sorry, I don't know why I put a G in there. Adjectives are probably the most important thing when it comes to phone sex and texting. You want to be very, very descriptive with you know your body parts and how you want them to move. Of course, like for me, I'm a I'm a curvacious lady, so I use a lot of adjectives to describe the way my curvaceousness feels and maybe the way it might make my customer feel, maybe the
way it moves. So definitely go on word hippo, look up some adjectives for what you feel your body type might be like, or what you feel you know, how you want something to.
Move in to a thosaurus to find words for how your body might feel like. That's actually pretty good actionable advice on that.
Yes, And also instead of saying when when I when I sext people or when people try to sex me in real life, they tend to say like, oh, I want to do this or I want to do that, you should say I'm gonna do this, or you should say yeah, you should, you should you should put.
More confident speech. You know what I would even say that's you could apply that outside of sex talk. It's just a general motivational thing. I'm gonna wake up at six am and go climb that mountain. I'm gonna, you know, come on your boobe, whatever the thing is.
Yes, I cannot imagine what it would be like waking up at six am and climbing the mountain. Jesus crazy.
Luna. Do you have any final thoughts before we go?
I do not, actually, well, okay, my final thought is I'm glad I was able to talk to you about my profession because I don't actually tell anyone that i'm besides like my my, my people who are close to me. So I'm glad I was able to fully talk to someone on the phone about it.
Beautiful. Thank you very much for sharing with us, Luna.
And oh yes, bless.
You having the rest of the night.
Oh wow, you too.
Wonder if she's going to send us an invoice for that? Melvin, Hi, Melvin. It says here you just got an oculus and you feel like you're more capable of conversing with people in virtual reality than you are in real life. This is a very interesting topic. I would love to hear more about your experience.
Yeah, So.
I had my quest to for about a week now, and I have anxiety when I talk to people. It used to be really bad, but it's gotten better. But I feel like when I'm playing games in virtual reality, I can just it's easy to just walk up to someone and be like, Hey, what's going on. So I've been I've been making some friends and it's pretty cool talking to them.
So what is the like landscape of this, Like, are you just dropped into some sort of like virtual meeting town and you have to like go up to someone in game in order for them to be able to hear you. Like, how does this logistically work?
I guess that depends on the game that you're playing. I've been playing a game called rec Room, which is just it's you can talk to people, and it's also got community community made worlds and stuff that you can go visit, but then mini games like it's got tcharades and dodgeball. But the way it works is when you walk near somebody, you can just start talking and they can hear you. You can like to put your hand
over your mouth and you stop talking. But there's a lot of little kids that play the game and it's kind of annoying sometimes because you'll like walk in and it's just a bunch of twelve year old screaming at each other and squeakers. But it's not. It's not all just kids. Like I met this mom. She was I think around kunded like she was around forties. She kept on talking to your kids, she was she was interesting to talk to.
Interesting. You met this mom in what was the game?
Oh, wreck room? We were playing charade?
Interesting? And so, uh do you is this a person that you keep in contact with at all? Like these people that you meet in VR, are they one off sort of social interactions or are you building significant relationships with any of the people that you're meeting online.
I'd say some of them are one off, like the moms. She was nice, but she was I don't know. I wouldn't really want to stay friends with her, but it was okay. I met this one other the other dude. His name is Penguin, and we've played for three days now, and i'll again and what do all daily challenges together? Play paintball with laser jag and then no, I may we just go and say sharade. But yeah, he's pretty cool.
Mm hmmm hm. So you're twenty years old, it says here and get Have you always been anxious talking to people?
I feel like when I was a kid, I wasn't, and then around middle school up, I've kind of had some anxiety talking to new people. It's interesting. I work at a grocery store, and we When I like have the mask on and I'm at work, I kind of feel like I can just talk to people about like I'll stop customers and like interact with them. But as soon as soon as I'm not at work and I'm
just myself, I like lose all my social skills. I was at Walmart one time and I had to ask ay a questions and just I was I started sweating. I was watching my forehead, stumbling over my words, like if you followed me, and I was like, I need you to repeat what you said. I couldn't under saying what you're saying.
Dude, so interesting you you gave up and you had to leave.
Yeah, I can't it. Just I was like, it's ay, and I just walked away from here.
It's so interesting to hear you say that. I feel like there's a big fact I want to call it, like the justification factor of social interactions, where like, you know, if you're at a party and you go up to talk to someone, it's like, why are you talking to me? Like, you know, you're you're thinking about You're thinking about all the reasons in the other person's head about why they
will like find what you're doing weird. But when you're somehow like justified in your existence, in your position on the earth at that very moment, like why are you talking to me? Well, because I'm bringing you up, you know, it's like this is a established familiar relationship. I almost feel that way similarly with this Gecko thing, where I'm a lot more able to have social interactions weirdly, you know, on this podcast and whenever I'm doing geck with things
than I am in real life. So there's there's you know, it's a legitimate, legitimate thing. I'm curious for you. Do you desire Okay, so you have this sort of social anxiety around real life, but when you're on the job or when you're in VR, you're chilling, you're shucking, you're driving, your your smooth moves, do you desire to take what you're learning in these areas in which you're more comfortable and bring it out into the real world or are
you sort of chilling in your comfort zone? Where where? Where does your desire lie?
I feel like I I've been working on that a little bit. I could do a little bit harder, but I'd love. I'd love to be the way that I am at work and in VR just everywhere, because I love talking to people. I love just starting a conversations about rand things or telling them a joke and then continuing on from there. But it's just hard to do that in real life talking to strangers, you know, m h m hm. But I guess not really you, but you don't feel like a stranger.
Well, I guess this is a verse. This is a version of like, I mean, how do you feel? How do you Okay? So you're on the phone with me, you know that there's, however, many whatever people watching, Like, how how do you feel right now? Because I mean, right now, you don't seem like this you described when you were talking to this Walmart person. You describe yourself as like a stumblely, sweaty mess. But I mean, I can't sue you, but you don't sound like you're that right now.
I I've been in my room like fasting and such on my hand, but I don't know. I have the computer turned away for me. I'm not really thinking about that, and I kind of feel it nobody's really gonna know who I am anyways, you know?
Is that is okay? So hold holder right there? Hold right there? Is that sort of one of the factors that might be fueling this, Like when you're in VR, nobody knows who you are. You're anonymous, so any whatever social you know, fuck ups that normally you would perceive as as worse than if they they don't know who you are? Is that is there an element of that in there?
Yeah? I like just like having the feeling of security. I'm being able to just like play the game and then just take it off and then it's like everything stays in there.
You know.
Do you make any sort of attempts to like how often do you put yourself in social situations in real life.
Like outside of working and just existing?
Yeah, outside of like working and.
Not very often. I'd say I don't go out very much. But when I do go out, just like to the store, I just put my headphones in kind of speed walk through places. You know, I don't really make any attempts to speak to people unless I really have to.
You're like a You're like a social superman. You go to Walmart and your clerk can't stumbling over your words. Right. Then you go home, you put on the headset and you're social superman. You're shucking in JIV and you're making the jokes. You're walking up right over to people and you're talking to them.
Yeah, I guess to put it.
Interesting. Interesting. I'm trying to think, you know, and again, man like that this is the reason I asked you because I feel like this all comes down to your desires, right. I feel like there's nothing there's nothing wrong with staying in your comfort zone unless if you desire and I think I think I hear it in you. I think I hear it in you that you that you desire to improve socially outside of the realms in which you're comfortable.
I'm trying to think of how you would do that because you're like, I mean VR, it's like it's like training wheels in a sense where like you have the social skills that you're developing in VR, and when you're at work, like they are. Okay, I'm thinking this alongside of you here. But that justification factor that I talked about of, like how do I put this, the VR element, the anonymous element, the justified I'm at work element, They're
all like launching you into this space. They're like propelling you. You're giving you, they're giving you momentum. But once you have that momentum, you're on your own and all the social interactions that you have are completely driven by you. They were just sort of started propelled by VR, by your job, but you're the one who keeps spinning the wheels once they get the little push. Does that feel accurate?
Yeah, I'd say so. I feel like in those situations, I have, like I don't I don't know how to decide, but I have, like i'd say, a reason to talk to people. But when you're just going to Walmart, you don't really have a reason to talk to the guy walking past you. So it's like why you even bother him, you know?
H m hm. So I think I think we just got you. Gotta we gotta How can how can you like you need like the push, the jump starts, whatever it is that will sort of get you. This is what I always talk about the middle of a conversation is you know, anyone can do it. It's super easy. Everyone's great at the middle of the conversation. It's the beginning that is the tough part. But once you are there,
you're shocking and jiving. So I feel like you have you have these training wheels of the VR and of you know, being at work that are pushing you into the middle. But then once that's that's removed, you have to sort of rely on yourself two and you know, your own confidence, which you know you kind of got to take the work to build to propel you into that middle part. Yeah, I mean, you know, what, what do you what do you think about all this?
I feel like you're right, but I don't. I feel like it's less of a confidence issue and more of a just finding a way to start conversation because I know, I mean, even at work, I'll have anxiety gonna talk to someone, But as soon as you get into the conversations, it's easy, right, And I feel like starting a conversation at work is easier than it's just real life.
Hey, what's your avatar in VR? What? What's your avatar?
Like?
Yeah, Like when people look at you, what are you?
Oh?
It's just a dude.
He looks like me. He's got a like flannel rest on. Just yeah, it's all just people.
Okay. I was about to say, I, I mean that's pretty That's why that's pretty good, because I was about to say, maybe you would feel more comfortable being out in the world if you were like a cow with big boobs or whatever the thing is. But you're already yourself in VR, so that removes a whole other step that was gonna have to be an issue for you. But but Melvin Matn, I, I like, I guess, I
guess this will be the last thing I'll say. But like the jump is hard of like as we're talking about, like motivating you to get to the middle, but like just know that that middle is there. You You've you've got the foundational conversation skills that you have developed in these more comfortable zones, Like you have them and they're applicable in all situations, even though you've cultivated them in these very specific ones. So so you're just you're just
missing You're just missing one little puzzle piece. I don't know what that puzzle piece is, but I feel like you're closer to the sociability level that you desire to be. Then maybe you think, yeah, hey, is there anything else you want to say to the piece.
I think it's just I think, what do you think?
Oh?
No, go ahead.
I think I just have to not really think about it and just to do it.
Yeah. Yeah, that's right. Yeah, that's the thing. That's that's one. One other thing is socializing. It's a very It's weird because socializing, when you're doing it right, is not a thinky thing at all. It's if you're socializing correctly. You're not strategized. I think this is my theory about it. But you're not strategized, and you're not thinking about what you're gonna say next. You're not thinking about how the other person feels. You're just very in the moment, very
being reacting viscerally and speaking viscerally. So you'll get there. You'll get there.
Thank you?
Anything else I wanna say before we go in Melbourne?
I don't know.
I love your stream. I listened through well I'm at work. I've listened to it for about a month and I'm just I'm happy I'll get to talk to you.
Thank you, yoh, thank you for calling Melvin have a guest of the night. You do, I gotta try this. R Hello Nico, Hi, how are you?
I am doing well? How about you?
I am a gecko on the computer. I wonder how much longer I can say that before it gets old? I wonder how much longer I can say I wonder how much longer I can say I wonder how much longer until it gets old? Until that gets old? See, this is my spinnar. It's going to get a little bit more metaw, don't be nervous, don't apologize. It's it'll all It'll all be over soon. What's going on with you Nico Haw's life?
It's actually been better than ever for me right now. Not related to my story.
I had.
Like how that kid earlier was talking about confession. I guess I have a kind of guilt confession that I didn't. I don't want anyone to be like, oh no, no, no, it's okay whatever. I just kind of wanted to say it out loud through a phone screen to anyone that's.
Listening and still not yeah, sure, what's going on?
So I'm I'm twenty one now. This happened when I was sixteen, and I'm totally fine now, and I'm recovered. I mean not to say that I had anything to really recover from, but so I did not have a lot of friends in high school, and I met this kid through video games and we became really close, and a few days intil my junior year, he drowned. He went on vacation and he drowned, and he was one of my best friends. And I had always felt really guilty about it because I was the captain of my
swim team for a long time. I mean I he had jokingly asked me a few times to teach him how to swim, and he got pulled out into a rip tide. So it's not like I would have been able to teach him something like with freestyle or something like that. But still that just made me kind of
feel shitty about it. But anyways, so the real confession that I have is that, uh, probably like six months after that, there was you know, watch Cut, like that YouTube channel that I don't know if they do, like confessions and all that whatever, whatever, what is it?
Watch Cut.
Yeah, it's just like, I don't know, little we asked one hundred people x y Z videos. Yeah, that's good. I watched those two. So it was a channel that was kind of like that, and they were they posted something that was like we're taking uh uh darkest secrets or whatever like that, and so I was like I had recently, right before that, I had lost like our entire group of mutual friends. So that was I was pretty alone in my grief besides like therapists and my
parents and everything. But so I submitted, uh whatever, I what I just said about not to take him, how to swim m yeah, And I went and checked the YouTube channel and when they uploaded it, and they featured my confession for the first like the opener cold open to hit him with the shaker, and I remember being so excited, like, dude, I'm famous right now, like look at this, and it's like it and it was what I really looked forward to was going to the comment
section and seeing all like the condolences and like just people feeling bad and everything, because it was just something that I felt like I did. But looking back on it, it's totally like, sorry, I'm saying like a lot, I'm pretty nervous.
But no, it's it's totally Uh.
I was totally using his death for attention, which is just so disgusting, and I feel awful about that. And uh, this is I mean, usually I listen to your podcast when I'm driving, and that's like the same times that I'll kind of talk to whatever I'm pretending, like what kind of being whatever, ghosts whatever, talk to him when I drive. So I kind of felt like it would be easy to talk to you about it because he says it both kind of like car conversationalists. I guess.
Interesting. Okay, so so you felt like you were using your friend's death for Internet points.
Yeah, I mean it was anonymous, and I mean it wasn't really about the views or anything, because I don't really.
Care about that.
Yeah.
Well, so so hold on, so so, so how long ago, just to like set the scene, how long ago after his death was this?
It was probably like, uh, five six months?
It just I mean, so this was this, so this this, this, this happened like five years ago. Oh yeah, yeah, okay, so at the time, because I feel like, how old are you know, I'm twenty one, you're twenty one, Okay, so you were sixteen years old at the time, and sixteen year olds do yeah things for a myriad of reasons, and you know, as we get older, we kind of think back. We have a little bit more perspective on why we maybe did the things we did when we
were you know, teenagers. You know, have you thought about why you did that?
Well, like I said before, like the all of the mutual films that I had made with him, those were like the only some of the only friends I had, and I lost them. At the same time, I didn't have anybody to really go off of and talk to. So it was nice feeling like anonymous people over the internet about whatever. I mean, Yeah, it's very selfish. It was just using a tragedy. He was seventeen, he'll never
get older. I mean, it's so it's just ridiculous now to look back and be like, oh, well that's awesome. But I put that out there just so that I could feel some sort of fake sense of consolation for a minute, you know what I mean.
So, I mean this was five years ago. So this sort of guilt that you have not ever teaching him to swim, but over submitting his story to this YouTube channel, is that a guilt that you still feel today?
Oh yeah, definitely. I mean when I think about him and then I kind of I question our or my grieving a lot of the times because I think about how when he died, all of the other friends kind of left, and I think about, like would he be with them if he was still alive, Like would he have made a group chat about me with them? Whatever? Like all that all this shit, But I don't so
I don't know. So I don't know, like is it ridiculous if I'm getting or if I'm grieving this much over a kid that might have been talking shit about me over PlayStation like everybody else did, and he just died before I had the chance to trying to see that. I guess, M.
Yeah, there's a lot of there's a lot of layers to this. I mean, I think that one you were sixteen and when you're in fucking high school. I I I if I were to look back at any of the things that I did, said thought at at the age of sixteen, I don't think I would be particularly proud of of of a very large amount of them.
So I think that you know, you feeling guilty about something that you did when you were sixteen, Like it makes sense, right, you got to give yourself a little bit of room to have these things as you are growing up and developing your own emotional intelligence and whatnot. You got to give the You're gotta give yourself room
to make these little mistakes. I mean, look, you currently right now understand it seems why you were acting the way you did at that time, and it's not something that you would do now, even though we are on a live podcast.
Yeah, I'm kind of double crossing myself right now.
But yeah, but we can for you. Who cares about that plot hole? Anyway? What the fuck was I gonna say? Well, tell me about your life now, okay, because it sounds like you were like pretty, I mean, like whatever, I'm I'm milking my friend's death for internet points. I mean, I mean, fuck it, like we both like you were lonely. You're very lonely. You're processing this this this death alone. Sounds like you had no friends and you were uh looking for for for for fucking something. I mean, why
does it? Why does anybody post anything online they're looking for attention? My friends, You are not alone in posting about you know what, if it's your friend's death, if it's you want a soccer tournament, if it's you eating lunch, it's all anything anyone does on the Internet is all inherently for attention. Everyone in the twitch chat right now is looking for attention. I'm looking for attention. It's all. It's all attention. So you know, keep that in mind.
But what's your life like now? Do you do you have do you have friends? Have you sort of found a better community for yourself?
Oh?
Yeah, once I once I graduated high school and got the fuck out of there. I made friends in college. I mean I had to leave for COVID, and then I left and went to a different school. But I have an amazing boyfriend now and he takes me on trips and I am on I mean, right after he passed, like probably a year after that, I doubled all of my meds. So I'm pretty medically happy. But I think a lot of the people in my life now have vastly improve my Oh look, I'm super grateful.
Yeah, you sound like you're in a much better place now than you were then. And I hope you're not beating yourself up too hard. I don't think anyone should beat themselves up too hard about anything that they did when they were they were a teenager or I mean, fuck man, if you're forgetting even about the teenager aspect of it. It's like, you know, I'm I would like to believe in most situations that people change. In fact, you know what, fuck, I'm not going to phrase it
like that. People change, people develop. You know, if you're looking back at your past and you're not embarrassed or horrified or ashamed, are you even growing? You know? So you need the humility and you're gaining the humility. It's not like you're looking back at that and you're like proud, proud of it. You know, you're you're you're growing. So I hope you're not beating yourself up too badly about it.
Thank you. I'm so happy that I got the call through. I can't wait to tell my friend that I put her onto your podcast too, and now she listens to it all the time.
So beautiful, rather sorry, I'm so used to for my saltations.
I will I will.
Hope you enjoy thumbing through the comments on this call.
Oh why are they awful?
Oh no, I have no idea what they are.
Oh perfect, Okay, wish me good luck, beautiful.
Have a good night, Nico.
Thank you so much.
Bye, Devanta, Yes, what's up? Devanta. How's it going, by the way, Davantage's Uh. It says here that your name is Devanta.
It's Davante.
Well, it says here that it's Davanta.
Oh well, I talked to Tim and I said it was Davante, but could have been a mixed up.
Well, listen, it says here that the computer is telling me your name is Davanta and and no offense. But I've been using the computer for way long than I've known you, so I'm inclined to trust the computer.
I mean, do you want me do you want me to ask how it's spelled, or do you want to ask the computer?
The computer is telling me that it's spelled d E v O n t A Davanta. That's what the computer. We can go with. That we can, okay, that's why I was going to go with anyway, that's what the computer says.
Yeah, yeah, that's fine.
DeVante says you're having some girl problems. It says you went on a date with a girl last week. You think it went well, but she hasn't texted you back since the date. Is this is this correct? Uh? Not necessarily, Devanta. This is what the computer says, you're telling me that the computer is wrong. You can tell me that the computer is wrong once and maybe I'll believe you, But you cannot tell me the computer is wrong twice.
I mean, it has been wrong once beginning with. But then again, I have talked to a girl after the date that we've went on and it went really well. She said the night in my house, so I can't necessarily say that, you know, I didn't talk to her after the date, you know.
So it's like, so, what's the situation, Devanta? Okay, So the.
Situation is, I guess, is my self esteem supposedly, Like that's what I'm guessing. I guess is because like the date went really well. You know, I don't like both said it. You know, we met the headlighting artist for the night because we both go to raves a lot.
You know, was at a leave.
Yeah, it was at a at a bar you know, well yeah, a.
Bar, bar rave music thing room with people dancing. Yeah, yeah, drink a lot of got it, got it, got it okay.
But yeah, anyways, it went well great, But I guess she hasn't been texting me back to the extent that I thought she would since it went really well.
Okay, what when you say she hasn't been texting you back to the extent you thought she would. What what is the extent you thought she would?
You know, at least at least a couple of times a day. It's been twenty four hours and she's SEXTI me back last. But again, I might just be overthinking it, m which I do I am prone to doing.
You are are you? I mean, what do you? What are you thinking? Are you thinking that this lack of communication is indicative of a of a lack of interest?
Possibly? Yeah?
H I I feel like I tell the same old story with all like sort of calls like this around dating things, and I'm always trying to reassess my position on these things. But I'm gonna I'm gonna throw this to you. I want to want your thoughts on it. Here's the thing. It sounds like, and I don't I don't know because I don't know this girl whatever, But it sounds like this girl is invested in you. You guys have a nice time, but there's an uneven level
of investment here. You're you're you're a little more invested than she is, which is not horror. That's at the end of the world. It's not doesn't mean you're whatever a simp. There's an uneven levels.
I mean, I was in a pretty serious relationship a year prior and it's been it's been a year since I've talked to anybody with even the thought of interest of going into another relationship.
Mm hmm hmmm. Anytime there's an uneven level of investment between two people, it just gets fucked up. It just it never works out. I think, no, no, no, no, But don't freak out, don't freak out. This is a good thing. Let me finish. You will what's your name, Devanta says, your name is Devanta, Devanta. You will if you continue putting yourself out there, find a nice lady with an equal amount of investment in you as you have in her.
That that that is very good advice, honestly, because that's all I want.
You know, So you can you can continue down this path. But listen, if you really like this girl that you went on the data and you think it's going well, and you want to get to a point where you two have an equal amount of investment in each other, because she doesn't, she doesn't not like you. I mean she just but she just doesn't get a text you every you know twice, you know whatever, she has her own life going on. I want to get down to
with you. I want to get down to you. Why do you have such a high investment in this person? What do you feel like is driving you to be anxious about how often she's texting you? Like, let's get down to the brass text because there's there's there's there's a deeper answer to that question. Then she's pretty and I enjoy talking to her. You know, this is this is what's what's what's going because that's all that's on
her side. What's going on on your side? That's causing this deeper level of investments?
So I guess, I guess it would be me trying to find like a career I want to go into, you know, or like maybe having a little bit better income, I guess, or or just more personal things in my life is right now, I just work door dash and I work my own schedule, you know, I make make buy So I guess I got a lot of time in my hands more so than she does, because she does work a lot more so than me.
M hm.
So that does you know? At up mm hmmm.
Yeah, No, that's that's that's sort of kind of everything you just said is kind of what I was getting at, where it's like, you know, this girl has got a as a full time gig. You know, she's got busy life. You know she I don't think you know, she might not not like you, but she's just you know, she has a busy life. She's got lots and lots of different pillars aside from just her dating life that are occupying her time, keeping her afloat. And I find I
found this in my personal life. I find this in people I'm talking to on this on this here computer Gecko show that if you don't have a lot of different pillars going on in your life, then when someone comes along, you tend to look at them and go, ah, this is this is gonna gonna make me happy? Is this person? Right? You know? And that caused you to be more invested then she is, and that fucks just funck shut up, you know.
Right, No, I ton'tally understand that.
It's so the so the long term sustainable solution is not to fucking use only this certain type of emoji when you're texting her, or to wait this amount of time or any stupid minute, fucking thing that people are always talking about when they're talking about whatever dating strategy.
It's all bullshit. The actual, long term, sustainable way forward is to build up a nice, diversified life portfolio so that you are not putting on an air that you're not desperate, but you are actually internally in your sole not desperate. Right, you know what I'm saying.
I know what you're saying. Geck, I know what you're saying. Man, I that that resonated hell up.
Good, good, says he. You're twenty one years old, Ok, it's beautiful. You know you got you got plenty of time to build that nice life. You're twenty two, perfect, perfect, you got plenty of time to build this nice diversified life portfolio. But I just I just want you to know what I'm telling you this from personal experience, you will not. The only sustainable solution is to actually build a life, and then other people in your sort of the dating world of your life will gravitate toward you
by chasing. Even if you end up finding you know does not well, it is not a sustainable solution for for anyone, right, And this advice is not gendered by the way this is. This is anything. This is men, women, whatever we are. This is not a you know, this is a just overall thing.
But that is that is very overall.
It also says here that you're a DJ and that you go by the name Slamming D. Yeah, you feel like this name has given people the wrong idea of who you are? Now? Is the computer wrong a third time? Or are we onto something here?
No, No, that that one's on to something. That's a whole pillar in my life as we were talking about here, that's a big passion of mine.
Beautiful, beautiful, Okay, so we're not starting this is good. We're not starting from scratch here. We got something, we got a thing, we got a passion, we got a hobby, we got something outside of U whatever to focus on. This is perfect. This is beautiful slamming D. Okay. It says here that you that you feel like, yeah, well okay, it says here that you feel like the name has given people a wrong idea of who you are. What idea do you think it gives people of who you are?
All right, Well, whenever people think of slam and D, you know, today's day and age, I have always thought people just you know, go right to dick slamming dick, Yeah, slam and d yeah. Yeah. People right, they go right to it, you know what I mean?
Okay, And is that not what slam and D means? What is your intention? Different from people's interpretation?
Wait? Way different? It goes way back into my childhood interpretation.
Actually, okay, what what is what is the what is the appropriate interpretation of slam and D?
So so my my stepdad, way way back when I was like ten years old or something, you know, I'd be playing little little league baseball or some you know, Bannicker basketball or something, you know, just small leagues whenever you're a kid, you know, and every time we win a game or something, or I make a basket, do let's go swam and d you know, you know my name is Davante, right vant As the computer says.
I'm gonna be honest with you. This is already this is already way too long of a disclaimer. People aren't gonna people people people are people aren't. It's not gonna register with people immediately. You're gonna you're gonna have enough time to explain, you know, right.
That's what I was worried about you know, it's it's a whole story behind it, you know.
Yeah, oh change change your name of me. Like look, I have the same thing. People think that I'm like a therapist because I'm therapy, get go, and I can't change now it's too late. I'm therapy, got go forever now. But I I don't. I don't have enough time to give the spiel. No, I'm not a therapist. I'm just a guy. I'm a Gecko guy and talk to people on the punt there. They're already tuned out, they already
have their idea. So I'm telling you right now again from experience I needed to learn from me on this phone call. Here, you pick a rebrand something some people get immediately, where the intention and the reception are are a little bit more on the same line, right.
No, I totally agree with that. That's what I was thinking I should do the whole time.
But I was Devanta, Devanta, Devanta, anything else you want to say to the people before.
We go, You guys, have a good night, beautiful.
Thank you Devanta.
Hey, thank you, Geko, you have a good night.
Man.
I can't believe that guy thinks he knows more than the computer. That's his first problem. That's the number one thing I recommend he work on, is being humble. Technology is king. Look around, people, we are not living in a society ruled by the government, not by kings, queens, not even by gods. We are living in a society ruled by the computer. And only a fool would think themselves to no less than that which rules the universe.
Goes on the line.
Taking your phone calls, every line teaching your life is not experts