Hello, Hey, have you got you? Hey? Hi there. What's your name?
My name's Jack.
Jack. Are you calling me for I see you have a weird area code or I guess weird for me. But what are you from Australia.
I'm calling from just off the coast of Nikonos in Greece. But yeah, the Australian phone number.
Oh what are you doing in Miconos.
I'm on a Virgin Voyagers ship. I'm a musician, so I'm like a guest artist on the ship right now. This is crazy. This is the first time I've tried to call, so my Telco in Australia is going to read me for this, but it's totally worth it.
This is crazy for me too. I've never talked to an Australian man working as the entertainment on a cruise in Miconos.
It's pretty trippy. I'm sort of a year and a bit into the gig and yeah, man, whenever I'm doing something or Senega guitar or just feeling fucking anxious, I put on your stuff and it's a it's the perfect it's the perfect you know, put your brain in default mode kind of kind of stuff, as well as being really interesting. I was just listening to the the episode with that girl who was stuck on the stuck on the river in the houseboat. Yeah yeah, definitely.
Yeah, yeah, nothing, nothing, nothing to calm your anxiety more while you're on a boat than listening to a podcast about a lady who is trapped on her boat.
A man, it's a I mean, it's a it's a big. It's like a little floating city. It's and you know, the cabin is pretty cool and got a little balcony here and staring directly into the sun right now. It's it's it's it's pretty nice. Can't can't complain at all. Definitely wouldn't complain.
How big is the Virgin Cruise? Like, how many people are on this boat? How big is this boat?
Oh? I could well, if I wasn't using the apps that I would need to use to check, I could tell you exactly who and from where and all that kind of stuff. But a couple of thousand, couple of thousand sailors something like two thousand, four hundred Dish sailors, which is the sort of name of the customers, and then there's I think one thousand two, one thousand three hundred crew or something like that. Might might be a little less, but.
There's a thousand crew hold on one hundred to one thousand. That's a large range right there.
Oh sorry, I misspoke this something something like god, I think it's like eight hundred to want twelve hundred, you know, so like eight hundred to one thousand, two hundred crew something like that, like don't quite.
Men, eight hundred to twelve, eight hundred to twelve, one hundred crew members. And that's so how many fucking people must be on this boat for there to be that many crew?
Yeah, I mean, Heaps is like there's at least two thousand sailors. And yeah, there's there's like fifteen levels to the ship as far as I'm aware, there's a sort of accommodation from level three to four and three, four and five for crew and then eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve, thirteen, fourteen levels for sailors like cabins of varying sizes and all that kind of stuff. That's where I'm not like, I'm not simping for Virgin here like they you know,
obviously they pay me to be on board. It's a great gig, but yeah, I'm not trying to be the not trying to be the travel agent right now.
Yeah, listen, man, I'm just asking how big the boat is. You don't have to give a coupon code or anything.
Yeah, yeah, affiliate marketing. Well, the thousands feet long, that's crazy. It's not the biggest ship in the ocean, but it's of the of the I think the second biggest class.
Isn't it crazy that they make that thing? How do they make that thing float? Yeah?
It trips me out as well, Like the fact that boats can be made of steel. They're like the heaviest things ever, but they float. And then the fact that airplanes fly as well, like trips me out to the same degree.
M Well, yeah, what do you think is more trippy the fact that airplanes can fly or that you can make a floating city.
Definitely? Airplanes flying, definitely. Yeah, that it freaks me out. Also, how frustrated people get in the air, Like I feel like I'm stealing from some comedian right now, but yeah, I definitely am. Like I think it was, like, you know, why do people complain in airports like you should be have have your arms up in the air the whole time, saying like you're on a fucking you know, roller coaster or something.
I think I think that's that's either that's either Louis or Dimitri Martin.
There you go your wheelhouse, you know as the as the comedy slash Therapy Get Go. But yeah, it's it's uh, I mean take planes to be on the ship in the first place, and I think that the planes triped me out more. But yeah, like getting on with with Virgin was my first first real like long format corporate gig. And before that, I was like a gigging musician in Australia. And before that I was traveling busking like street performing,
and this this beats the hell out of that. So I'm I'm pretty stoked.
That's so cool. Man. What do you what do you do? What do you play?
Oh yeah, I used my real name and everything. My name is Jack Shepherd's. I won't go as far as putting out my handle and all that stuff, but I play acoustic and electric guitar and then beat box looping and vocals.
Like like what like what Mark Rebier does.
Yeah, yeah, actually very very similar, just with with instruments and more like, uh man, he gets he gets those loops going. So fast. I'm more of a like technician. I spend way too much time like focusing on the quality of the sound rather than the performance. That's I mean,
this gig's kind of making me a better performer. But now you know, they're just like yeah, beatbox living and vocals and vocal stacks and sort of remixing it live exactly like Mark Rebbie reb Rebbie Rebbi, Rebelle rebe loop daddy.
So how long are you on this uh ship?
For another two days? So I've got my second show of today in a few hours, and then my last show tomorrow, and then I'm off. I'm going to go see my lady in Paris for a day and then I'm back to Australia for three weeks and I'll be back in uh yeah yeah, too much, too much travel and jet lag?
You have you have a lady in Paris waiting for her man out at sea.
Yeah, I mean that makes me sound more like a sailor who does something. But this this is like a floating show.
Shut up, shut up, jack, Jack. You are literally a sailor who does You are fucking sailor and you are doing things, so you actually you actually totally are a sailor doing something right now, you're sailing and making making loose? What is the show? Are you like in a band or is just you?
There are bands on board, so there's like a few different formats, but I'm solo. So they've got these spots where like instead of having a stage show, you know, which you know, they do have stage shows on board, you know, full on like moving stages and aerial and
all sorts of crazy shit. But instead of having like a walk by act, which is sort of like a street performance term, you know, where people would walk past the musician and they're just playing tunes, or having a stage show, which is you know, stage show you have you know, buskins are kind of like halfway between, Like we're very used to setting up doing a show and then getting out of there quickly, be it because the next busker wants to get on the pitch, or because
there's a cop around or whatever. So it's kind of like this perfect thing to drop in at points around
the ship, you know. So we've we've got like sound texts to help us set up and everything they've got you know, where we're plugged into the main system and yeah, there's a, there's a bunch of us that sort of got picked up from from busking spots around the world, and then a few like giggy musicians doing the same kind of thing, and yeah, there's a yeah, it's it's it's just a solo show of like forty five minutes to an hour, and yeah, it's pretty fun. It's really fun.
I might even I might live stream the one I do later on today because that'll be after your after your stream finishes, I guess. And then yeah, people can check it out if they want.
Do you are you allowed to leave the ship or do you have like an ankle monitor that ties you onto the boats properly?
Yeah?
Yeah, they give us daily whippings to improve morale. No, it's it's pretty good.
Man.
Like the guest artists, So I'm one of the guest artists on board. We don't come on for like a week to four weeks, so I've just done four weeks. But yeah, we can get off in every every port as long as we're not doing a show. You know, all we have to do is be there on time to play our shows, and other than that, we're we're just like any other any other sailor on.
The ship and do you are you getting along well with the other performers or is there any drama?
Oh, there's always all sorts of all sorts of drama. But I definitely wouldn't. I wouldn't there publicly, even if the overlap in your listener basis is probably quite low. I'd uh, just because it's a small group of people.
Can I well? Okay? But without without getting specific, without getting specific, is it is? It is? The drama is when when drama stirs up at sea? Is it about? Is it like who's fucking who? Or is it like you know, uh, oh, they're they're eating up too much scenery on on when you guys are performing, Like what is the drama typically about.
I haven't seen any real drama about like performance kind of stuff, because everyone's I mean, they they hire pretty good news those you know, uh, not to my own horn, but yeah, I feel I feel like I'm in I'm in a good company and everyone's pretty good. But yeah, the dramas all the normal sort of ship who's fucking who? And so and so is you know said or did this?
And it's just yeah, it's just all that kind of stuff or occasionally this drama about you know, you know such and such who we work for or who manages this group of people said, what, oh, I can't believe Oh my god, gotderneath such a betch Can you believe it? You know, just just the same sort of stuff you get in any in any sort of in any kind of workplace. But yeah, it's you know, it's it's kind of like, yeah, you make your own time. You know, you could spend your entire.
Sorry, go ahead, when are you finished?
Oh, you can spend your entire contract, you know, just doing your shows, going to your room and eating and getting off the ship. Or you could be social the whole time and you be drunk every night if you can, if your body can stand up to it. And it's kind of a use your own adventure.
So that that leads me to what I was going to ask you. That leads me into what I was going to ask you. Are you living the rock star lifestyle on this ship? Because I have to Are you like you're like ship famous, you're the most prominent. It's like a little city, and at that time, you're like one of the most prominent musicians. Uh, just even by not you know, I'm sure you're great. But even just by being one of the only ones there, you know, you're like your.
Ship definitely not definitely not famous off the ship, but yeah, I do. I do forget that. There's like a program and there's like touch screens around the ship where people can scroll through and see what's going on. So people will be like Jack could to see it, and I'll be like, you know, in my head, like who the fuck are you? Oh yeah, I'm doing this gig. You know, you forget that you're kind of kind of representing the company anytime you're outside to Kevin So. But yeah, people
are nice, man. I mean they're all they're all on holiday, like you know, they're all they're all having a time. You know, some people have this is just like how they live. Some people have done like sixty and seventy cruisers before. Some people have done hundreds. Some people have saved up all year to you know, get on the
ship with the the partner or whatever. There's no kids on Virgin, so you know, it's not like there's a yes, it's like I don't know if it's eighteen and up or twenty one and up because it's technically an American company. But yeah, it's it's it's pretty it's pretty cool, man, Like you get to feel like a rock star. The actual rock stars is like there's a class of sailor who pay for like the best cabins that they're called rock stars on Virgin But yeah, man, they treat us pretty good.
You know, you said you said it was to choose your own adventures. So I ask you, you know, what adventure have you chosen? Are you? Are you partying every night? Are you kind of keeping to yourself? Like what's been your vibe on the strip so far.
This one? I've been kind of keeping to myself. Like got kind of sick over the last week, so I don't want to be like, you know, coughing and spluttering around sailors and that. But I've just tried to get off the ship in places where there's something to do.
Like Santorini's one of my favorites, because there's this massive hill, like you can walk down the down the steps from the top and it takes like twenty minutes of just you know, going downhill, and you would think that that would be that would be fine, but it's like it's proper workout, you know, So whoever has the show. After we've been in Santorini all day, it's like, you know, just playing real down tempo tunes. Everyone's like a bit
heat stroke and hit stricken and relaxed and that. But yeah, I've done I've done the Bahamas on an earlier contract, and I'm doing that again in August on this other ship, Valiant Lady. And that's that's probably my favorite route, just because there's this one dog at the beach there that like came and made me and my girlfriend like it's it's kind of owners for the day and.
You you you gotta you adopted a dog for the day from the streets.
Oh sort of. But I found out that that she's she's not just my dog, because I've spoken to some other sailors who have done the same route and they're like, oh, that's that that blonde kind of staffy Staffagetaria type type dog at Radio Beach in the Bahamas and they're like, oh, yeah, yeah, she's real friendly. I'm like, oh, I thought it was just me.
What a slutty dog in the Bahamas.
Yeah, yeah, slutty bitch, which is a phrase any time would ever use that phrase.
Where in Australia.
Are you from Sydney when you visited? I was. I wasn't in Sydney, otherwise I would have been at the show.
Yeah.
I like Sydney, so it's a good town. Why I sold? Okay, So you live in Sydney, you're in Greece. Your girlfriend's in Paris. Are you Are you and your girlfriend like both traveling wonder people? Or do you guy? Are you guys? Do you guys live some form of domestic life somewhere?
Yeah? She did. She's traveled a bit in her life, but doesn't travel as much. Actually met her in Australia at the end of twenty twenty three, just before I did my first cruise ship contract, and I didn't know I was in four you know, So it's you know, there is a there is an adult vibe on the ships and especially within the first contract there were some crazy bands on who could you know, drink a fish
under the table. So I didn't, you know, I kind of thought like, this is the lifestyle, Like I don't know how I'm going to survive this in a freshly you know, very very close relationship. But to answer a question, she lives in Paris. She's a personal trainer and helps with like flexibility and mobility, especially for all the folks and you know people who could use it, which is everyone. Just by the way, like two, all the men out there where like much more likely to get her nars
and like damage around our hips and shit. If you just spend like two minutes in the morning like stretching that shit, you can avoid it. And it sucks. It sucks when you get that surgery. So like stretch your hip flexes. Anyway, how old are you, Jack, I'm thirty two.
Is your body starting? Are you starting to feel like your body decay or because you're still young? Yeah at thirty two, I.
Think, Yeah, I think I'm still young at thirty two, but I'm definitely feeling it already, like my neck, my back, My neck and my back, you know, like they're just fucking hurt all the time. Like I think that's from being a musician as well though, and like I'm a very I'm a very nerdy musician, like a you know, build my guitars and spend or have spent a decent amount of time hunched over a laptop. So you know, just like Bad Bad had its with posture and looking
after themselves. But there's all the facilities you could ever want for forgetting yourself well on the ship. You know, you've got You've got you know, full gyms and all that, even a boxing ring, like all sorts of like a running track around the top. But there's also you know, a bar open pretty much every hour of the day. So it's a you know, choose your own adventure in that in that sense as well.
Man, I'm dumb as hell is. I was imagining like a weight rack that had like a like if I was on the ship and I saw like the weight rack, you know, and I had like like the one hundred pounds weight on it or whatever, I'd be like, yeah, it's crazy. They can put all this on the boat and it's still letting sink.
Yeah, I mean, yeah, it's still It still trips me out, especially when you see the front I've forgotten the name of it, but that the big round thing, you know, the long deck of the boat. You know, it's the or the ship, you know, it's the ballast or the you know, the sort of round you know, phallic looking thing right at the front bottom of the ship like cuts through the water, and it's just like just big solid piece of steel and just it's do you ever
actually the rehearsal space. Yeah, on that delay, there's a rehearsal space at the at the front of the ship, which is like where the crew one of the places of the crew can have parties and like where the musicians can rehearse, and it's like right up in the like you know, on the other side of the insulation, you can you can just see the shape of the
right at the front of the ship. So it's like depending on what day you're in there, where at sea or in port, it can be too rocky to rehearse and you just go like, oh, I'm gonna be sick. I'll go back to my cabin instead of practicing.
Do you miss the busking lifestyle?
Ah?
Sometimes, because it's like it's a full on the open world, choose your own adventure, and this is more of a sandbox choose your own adventure. But yeah, there are a lot of things about busking I don't missed because it's like it's one of the most beautiful things I've ever done, but it's also led to some of the most horrible and grotesque you know, like a really really high wavelengths,
you know, massive highs, very very low lowers. So yeah, it's it's like and also playing for your playing for your your money, like you know, I need I need this money or I'm not going to you know, have a place to sleep is not not sustainable, and it also leads to some very flunky kind of neuroses, both personally and like in groups of people, Like there becomes this kind of I'm going to be the best busker kind of thing, and I'm struggling for a better analogy
than something which is kind of ableist. But it's like that joke I heard in high school of like, you know, being the fastest runner at the Special Olympics. You know, it's like to totally avoid the ableism of that, but like you know, it's kind of like you just it's it's like.
It's yeah, yeah, it's like it's like it's like it's like we're listen, we're playing on the streets, you know, like you can be the best, yeah, and we're still on the streets. Yeah.
Yeah, absolutely, Yeah, I just struggled for a better analogy there.
You said, Well, so I want to I'm curious about this because you said you said that through busting, and I can imagine it has high highs where you're like like ooh, I'm like, I'm like the fucking Beatles playing in that park, you know. I'm like, like, there's like busking, it's a very romantic activity, you know. I'm sure there's high highs. And then but also you're exposed to just the general public. And when you're exposed to the general public,
there's there's a lots of wild cards. I'm curious, if you're willing to share, do you have any specific If you're willing to share, do you have any specific do you have like a specific high moment that you can remember and then also a specific low moment that you can remember that you you'd be down to share.
Ah, yeah, yeah, I've got I've got a couple. So high moments is like, man from I remember one year I was in Switzerland Montro Jazz Festival and just busking by the lake there, and it's like they have a coin in in Switzerland, the five franc coin, right, and it's I don't know, it's about the size of a
gatorade leg or something. And there's nothing sweeter than the sound of that coin being clicked in to your guitar case, because it's worth like at the time it was worth like eight Australian dollars, it's probably it's probably worth about five American actually don't know the conversion, but you know
you'd be busting right by the lake there. The lake is just you know, lukewarm, perfect for swimming, and you could literally leave your stuff with some shop owner in the markets there, you know, players that make a bunch of money, jump in the lake, go get some wonderful food. Watch another busker. You know, people are from all over the world selling all sorts of really cool stuff that you know, actual market prices instead of like you know,
hips to market proces. And there's just all this you know,
awesome festival atmosphere. You know, you look across the lake and you're seeing the snow covered Alps in another country, but it's like a t shirt weather down on the ground, and you know, there's like tug Burt's going past, and they're like jets flying over and you know, so you get these wonderful, wonderful experiences like that, and you can you can turn and you know, a decently busy street into you know, one hundred two hundred people all gathered
around watching something who would never otherwise like group together. And that's like the beautiful thing about busking. You know, you'll get just groups of people together kind of being present in a way that you kind of never would see otherwise. And also like that they they want to be there because you know, if they want to leave, they'll just live like there's nothing keeping them there. There's no ticket, there's no expectation. So that's the kind of
beautiful part of it. And then the ugly pasts are like, I've got I've got mates or acquaintances who have you know, I've been assaulted a bunch, you know, on the street and you know, both on a while performing while not performing in France. Once I had my guitar stolen in Marseilles, actually got it back immediately.
But.
Uh yeah, I've had people steal money out of my case in front of me and flip me the bird as they walk away, thinking that I'm not going to chase after them. I've had just all sorts of fucking rudeness and horrific ship I've got. I've got mates and acquaintances who have one fellow I'll leave his name out of it, but you know, some some men of the streets in Ireland, shall we say, stole his amplifier, you know, couldn't have been worth more than one hundred crewds or something.
And he later later on that evening, saw them, went to confront them and they took his eye out.
You know.
Yeah, it's it's it's real. Highers and love this kind of thing. And I think there's a generation coming along now who you know, see it on like TikTok or YouTube or whatever and social media and go like this is the this is the way forward. And I always want to say, like you're asking a sick, sick way to like trim the fat off your performance and make you into a better performer. But it's also like a
word of warning. So I tend to tell people that exactly of just like do it, but for the right reasons and remember to get out of it, because there are people in their fifties and sixties who are still trying to be the best buster in the pitch.
And it's like, so what ends you know, hmm, you know, I saw I had this thought. I don't know why I'm turning it back to me, but my dad is like, my dad is in is like, fuck, holds my dad. He's like mid sixties, early sixties like that, but he's he's his sixties, an older guy, and he's like he's now he's just now learning how to play guitar, like he's been learning how to play guitar for the past like year or two. I think it's it's really cool. I love it that he's like, you know, in the sixties,
but still learn how to do that shit. And anyway, I was, I was at Union Square Park, one of the New York parks, and I saw this like older guy just like playing the the bagpipes or the saxophone. I forget what instrument he's playing. Let's say it was
the bagpipes. And he's playing the bagpipes and he's just kind of and then and people are walking by and they're smiling, and uh, you know everything you were saying the beautiful thing, Like it's so cool to have like like a free thing happening in a public place where folks just are living their life and they walk by
and they smile and it's cool. And I was, I was watching this guy, and I was like thinking about my dad, and I was like like, you know, and I was At the time, I was also kind of thinking about like, what the fuck is my what's my life going to be like when I'm that age, And I was like, maybe I'll maybe I'll learn the bagpipes when I'm sixty and I'll just be like this guy at the park and I'll just do that and that's that. That didn't say, I guess the fantasy of that in
my head. I was like, that didn't sound too bad being being this guy at the park whatever. I mean, if that guy was saying, if that guy turned to me and he was like that was that was pretty good? Right, I'm gonna be playing fucking Madison Square Garden when I'm in my nineties. I'd be like, I don't know about that. But if you're like, just be being in that moment is pretty cool, you know. It's a it's a nice service to provide for society, to just play music out in public. It's cool.
And just like maybe my I kind of got out of busking after some some very negative experiences that were uh, well it's traumatic, and so I kind of made a hard exit and it's probably like biased to me away from it, you know. So it's like I immediately start talking about the good of it and then just go, oh, yeah, but the bad of it as well. But yeah, that that thing. I mean, I still love it, and I still do it sometimes not so much for money, and
I'm very lucky to have this gig, you know. It's it's the more than I ever dreamed I would have kind of thing. But yeah, the beauty of going and playing for people in the street and those moments that you do get, especially for younger musicians. I still I still encourage anyone, you know, if you can get out to a street where there's a bunch of people around and you feel like it's safe to do so, I'd
seriously recommend it. It's just a beautiful thing, you know, when people are all just gathered being present.
You know, are a lot of were there any turf wars? Like did you ever have someone here's my spot? Yeah?
Yeah, yeah, that's most of what you deal with when you I call it professional busting. It might sound weird to some people, but yeah, I was a professional usker,
and yeah, that's most of what you deal with. So you have queue systems, which is where first in best dressed you you get there first, and you either choose your spot, or you get the next spot in line that's available at the end of the queue, or you have draw systems, which is like everyone rocks up at a given time and draw straws or sticks with numbers on them or something.
And this is all very This is like informal. Right, so you could you could shiny eyed walk off, walk up to Hyde Park and be like, I'm going to play the saxophone right here. It's a public park, and then all of a sudden, a bunch of clowns and jugglers and the guitarists are like, hey, hey, we have rules here, buddy.
Hey, buddy, this is a group of people who are extremely likely to be sort of like a little bit you know, anti government, if not anarchist. But there are some fucking rules here.
But right, that's that's the funny thing. Due, that's the funny thing is like, yeah, it is kind of like a like a hippie like anti it is kind of like an anarchist thing to just be like I'm gonna just go to this public place and start a concert and then slowly you start a little government around it.
I mean, yeah, you know, yeah, yeah, it's it's it's it's a funny thing, you know, or it's the phrase power of boards a vacuum. So if there's no if there's no sort of hierarchy systems, and people just going to naturally make one. I found that to be true all over the world, like everywhere a bust at least. You know, I haven't been all over the world, but I've been to a few few different countries. And yeah, it's like you'll you'll have. It's something like ninety seven male, so
you'll have and we need more one in dusk. And you know, so like any any creative women of any kind, you know, to encourage you and find your local find your local community of buskers and get amongst it and uh, you know, put put the dick swinging, ego centric fuckers in their place.
Yeah, swing, swing some fucking labor around, dude. We need uh, we need, we need, we need all kinds of people swing and all kinds of stuff all over all over the world. Well tell me this, tell me this, uh, of all the places you've been, what's the best place to busk? Like give me, like give me like a place in a city, in a country or whatever. And then the worst, Oh, by the way. Also, while you think about that, I also just thought, I don't We're too late in this conversation for me to say this.
But in case if anyone doesn't know, busking means to like play music in public.
Yeah, too late, It is.
Late for me to say that. But I've used the word busking in front of people for and they I don't know if a lot of people knows what that means. But anyway, sorry, go ahead.
Actually that reminded me of something else. If anyone's looking to get into busking and you're wondering, like people don't have cash, how am I going to collect tips? There's a site called busk dot co b u s k dot co h and they let you hook up I think it's I think it's striped and PayPal to a QR code that they'll also you know, do their design for you and for phenomenal fee, like printed out on phone board and send it to you so you have
signed it. So people can then scan a QR code and tip you with like Apple paye and all that kind of stuff.
But you just used venmo. You just write your Venmo down on a piece of paper. Sorry, no, use your website, never mind, never mind.
Sorry, no, true, true, you guys have Venmo and cash up in the US. Yeah, forget I've I've never busted in the US.
Right right, I forgot it.
I tried, But yeah, I tried to play in Las Vegas, which is the first place I went in the States once, and it was like the first or second time I went out in the street. You know, a private security guard pulled a pistol on me, and I was like, oh shit, I'm definitely in America.
God, yeah he pulled he pulled a pistol on you.
Yeah, it's like, you know, one of these private security dudes for the for the casino there. I wouldn't say it was casino, but like it didn't point it at me, but pointed at you know, forty five degrees to the ground, like I'm fucking serious, you have to move. And I was like, yeers, fuck, Like I'm in Australia. You can argue with a cop and they probably don't even have a gun, at least in my experience. So yeah, it was it was a bit of a culture shock, but yeah, yeah, yeah,
so it could be kind of crazy. So maybe Vegas maybe not the best place to busk.
Or that's a good answer.
I do have a great night who makes his living for the most part dusking there, And it kind of depends on the act. And it's also like I'm not an American, so I don't know that it's subtle culture and how to how to hook people and how to how to work on the street there and hustle. Right, Yeah, that's a whole that's a whole other beast I haven't conquered.
I'll say this about Vegas is one time I was walking down the uh. I was dressed up as the Gecko and I was walking down the strip and this like twelve year old came up to me and he was like, hey, man, I listened to your podcast. And I was like, do you two fucking young listen to my podcast? But whatever I took, I took. I took a picture with him, and then and then his mom runs up after him after, like his mom runs up to me after he leaves, and he's like, hey, thank you,
and she tries to give me five dollars. So that's the That's the best place I've ever busked.
Yeah, dude, you could fully you could fully take tips and like you know those videos that go around of like I'm a lawyer, but I'm not your lawyer, and they give like advice on the street you could totally put up like a tip bucket.
And wait, is that are there actually like busking lawyers.
I've seen I've seen on Instagram, so it's probably just my algorithm. But and I say those, I've seen one dude multiple times, so maybe it's just his sticks. But uh, like like.
The Charlie Brown thing, except with lawyer, except with yeah, law advice. Man, that's fucking crazy that somebody pulled a gun on you for fucking just busking. That sucks.
Oh dude, that's not even the that's not even the craziest time with with with guns. Mexico was fucking nuts and had nothing to do with busking. I'll tell you the story if you want to hear it. But I haven't answered your question. I'm notoriously bad at answering.
Okay, hold on, I'm putting I'm putting a pin in Mexico. I'm and ask you about that afterwards. But yes, give me. The best.
Best place is, hands down, Edinburgh Scotland Fringe Festival, which is the month of August. If people are looking for something to go and like go and do and they're like the arts and ship. Then Edinburgh Fringe, like it's a life changing thing. I went for the first time in twenty fifteen and became one of the regular crowd. In just on one pitch there where a lot of maybe high impact musicians play, so basically musicians who have
big speakers. And then there are I think it's like two hundred buskers of all different you know of sort of the what i'd call the og disciplines. You know, circle shows where it's like you know, comedy and juggling or something dangerous or you know, there's even due two set up tight ropes. There's a chip called Kate Mill, a shout out who does like a Marionntoinette like full on you know, mind act people, people on ten foot unicycles, giraffe unicycles. And then I've seen some of the most
incredible stuff on the street there. I've seen you know, the entire Royal Mile blocked off and a guy you know, climbing up a drain pipe and into an apartment, you know, with a thousands of people blocking off the street watching him. And like just these these master entertainers who have been doing it for you know, a couple of decades who just really know how to make a show from nothing, you know, and they'll you know, some duds have a big a big box of kit and unicycle and all
sorts of stuff. Some dudes have you know, a micro headset, microphone and a deca cards and can can do a massive shows. Like you see, all sorts of incredible stuff. And that's just the street. Like you've got you've got stage shows, like all these big artists who you wouldn't expect to see in a small club or whatever. We'll be trying out new stuff. You've got comedy, theater, music, poetry, street and historical pause. It's like it's a it's a magic place.
So I have to ask, I do have to ask. It's interesting you say it's the best one. Is it not a little tricky to be busking during Edinburgh because there's so much competition around you.
There is competition, and there is a whole thing with a draw, and there is you know, drama all month long and all that kind of stuff. I mean, if it's if it's the first time, if you if you're like you've never busked and you're going to be like, as it's my first time, I want to go and go and do this big festival. It might be a bit a bit like no, it's just kind of water up to your up to your chest instead of you know, up to your ankles. But you know, it's it's just incredible,
Like I'd recommend anyone to go. And it's different formats, so different sort of levels of performer will be given different spots in different places. They have storage for a really really reasonable fee that you can use all month long. If you've got a lot of equipment, they've got security to look after it, like they've got an ID system. Like it's it's the only place in the world where you'll go and be treated really really well as a busker.
You know, if you don't have a visa for the UK, they will give you a letter that grants you access to the festival to visa free. So it's like the other busk is gonna hate me for advertising the festival because you know there's a lot of that.
I mean, I mean in the newcomers, it's the fucking it's like one of the biggest friends. It's it's i think the biggest fringe festival in the world. So it's I don't think you're I don't think it's exactly uh gate capt.
Yeah now Jack, I mean yeah the worst place.
No, no, no, I was gonna ask you that. Oh yeah, uh I like I like this sentence. What went down in Mexico? Jack?
So I got run into motorcycles in twenty twenty three with my buddy. Shout out to David Morin music. He is an unbelievable musician. But we were ripping through the through the desert outside of s j D on the West Peninsula there in Mexico on these little, these little motorbikes that you were you really couldn't register in the US or Australia. They were They're real rickety pieces of shit.
But we're going to this oasis for the day. It's like apparently there's this this oasis out there where it's like rock pools and swimming in the middle of this desert. So we're ripping and we come around a corner, you know, through mountains and deserts and all that, and there's all of a sudden an oasis town. So we know where and we're in the right spot, you know, lush, green as fuck something out of a movie, and you know, we're in Mexico. You can get green smokable stuff pretty easily.
So we ride to the top of our hill. It's like a little outlook out post kind of thing that looks down over the town and we stop, get off our bikes. We're dressed in all black, you know, so no one could really see, you know, who or what
we are. And we start rolling a jay and these we see these like utes we call them in Australia, so you'd call them like a like a truck, you know, with the bench seats in the back, and military police you know, sitting in the back, you know, decked head to toe in gear and you know, guns and all that for anyone who's wondering. Like in Australia, we don't have a lot of guns, so I don't know my way around them. So sorry, I can't describe this that accurately.
But we see them from up on this little outpost and we think, oh, they're not coming up here for us, and before we have any idea what's going on, they're pulling up on us. So it's like five or six dudes get out and you know, they're decked out like you know, full on military, and they've got clips on the chest and like semi automatic canons. Put the hands on them. And my buddy Dave, he speaks a lot
more Spanish than I do at this point. I've only been there a month or so, but we you know, they come up to us and he kind of kind of freeze us up, and I'm just like, well, I don't have any other option than to say gaday or whatever. I said. They must have been Allah, and everyone there, like everyone in that town, didn't seem to matter how old or young they were. They would greet you with like a fist bump or a slap of the hands
and then a fist pump. So I just said gooday or Ollah and held out my fist and the dude kind of instinctively took his hand off the butt of his weapon to like fist bump me. So then it was like okay, like a little bit of the tension broken.
But what I didn't realize when I kind of did this was that there was a guy standing right behind me, and just as I do this, he just pokes me in the back of the neck with his fucking cannon and like, man, I've never gone so fucking cold in my life, just like you know, figuratively needed me underwhere. And yeah, the guy just kind of barked at us to uh, you know, to show us shown passports, and we both happened to have our passports on us, which
was fucking saving. Gross. But you know, those are military police dudes who are out there looking for for like cartel guys, right, you know, because that's the that's the whole that's the whole thing that's going on underneath the economy and community of the local township. So as soon as he saw that, we were like, oh, these aren't cartel birds. Who's face tats? And you know I'm white as fuck, you know, so probably helped the kind of behaved like, ah, we've we wanted to see some fucking
acting today. And I didn't speak Spanish enough, but I could see from the body language, and you know, the guy kicking the dirt like, oh, I wanted to beat some dudes up, but yeah, and to make things worse, it was like when they when they rolled up on us, you know, we were he had my buddy had his hat over my hands to stop the wind from blowing
away the weed. I was trying to roll. So they just caught us red handed, like rolling a roll in a j but they didn't really speak enough English to say like that's it's not okay, or like a confiscating or like you've got to pay us, or you know whatever they were going to do. But yeah, man, that was that was absolutely mental. But I basically just said like Los Angeles, sorry, sir, you know, and put put the weed in the roll into my pocket. He kind of looked at me like you can't. You can't fucking
do that. And I was kind of thinking, like, well, you don't speak enough English to tell me otherwise.
So we have a much English she speaks. He's got a big fucking gun. He can kind of tell you whatever he wants.
Yeah, yeah, I was. I was not not exactly thinking I was in a good situation at the time. But yeah, once we showed them my passports and it was like yeah and then and then man, we rolled onto this. We did end up rolling the Jay later on in the day and after we got to this little oasis called Santiago and it was like one of the most beautiful fucking places I've ever been. It was like five bucks or something to spend the whole day in this
crazy like natural water park. Its fucking nice way to relax after that intense situation.
But it sounds like overall, I would say, it sounds like overall the sea has been a lot safer for you in your career in general than the land. Yeah, I'm here. I'm glad to hear that you've uh yeah, that your your your career is skyrocketed. It sounds that's really awesome.
Yeah, man, it's it's helped absolve a lot of my sort of illusions about the world and sort of I think, kind of juvenile thinking. And it's also made me a lot more just sane, like like I used to I used to smoke quite a lot of weird you know, for a good few years after I stopped the busting and kind of kid kid myself that it was helping me,
And it does helped some people. I'm not speaking badly of it, you know, but it's just not compatible with me, and it made me a very paranoid, like uncommunicative, kind of depressed person. And yeah, since stopping because obviously you can't get it on the ship, and you know, you've
got to be comp intest to do your job, your performances. Yeah, it's just I'm enjoying my own company better and the relationship that I that I started with my lady in Front just before I started doing this gig is flourishing and sort of everything I've everything I've ever wanted out of a relationship. So I've got a lot to be thankful for and and I'm having a fat time.
Yeah, Jack, is there is there anything else you want to say to the people of the computer before we go?
Is it allowing me to share my Instagram?
Yeah? Well, actually, you know what's funny is I was looking at the Twitch chat and like the second after you said my name is Jack Shepherd, but I won't be sharing my handle, I was like, like, somebody already posted your website in the chat. Sure, yeah, well, I mean that's what happens when you Yeah, yeah, yeah, of course, Yeah, go ahead, share whatever you share, share all your stuff.
Yeah, I said I wasn't going to, but here we are. So it's uh from the days when you had to get your handle on social media by removing vowels from it because someone else had the fucking tag I wanted. But it's a mister Shepherd without the vowels. So m r s h p h r d so mister Shepper. Oh, it's just it's just that everywhere we've had this.
Man, this is couol. Just I'm just scrolling through your Instagram. You're a cool ass, dude.
This is a great man.
Look at this. Yeah, this guy anyone you're like, You're like the Australian. You're like the Australian John Mayer.
Dude, wait to hear me play guitar before we say that, because that's a that's a good compliment.
I haven't heard him play guitar either, but you guys, just look.
That's cool, that's that's funny. You say that because they're a dude who looks more like him and plays more like him from my busting pitch in Sydney, from my home pitch. But yeah, because because you've because we've had this conversation now and I'm about to do my last set in the sort of main spot on the on the ship. I'll live stream my my set later on tonight, and hey, may as well shout you out like seeing you said you let me do it here.
And I'm looking at I'm looking at this post. I've scrolled through your entire Instagram. You don't post very often. I'm looking through okay for this is from March twelfth, twenty nineteen. You posted a picture of a bearded dragon. There's you have a.
Last bear to dragons?
Man, oh look my.
Not my bearded dragon. But when I was allowed to post for some photos for a cover of a CD that is on Spotify. But yeah, they're beautiful little animals. Man, they actually have three eyes.
Look at this picture of you like fixing a fuck. I don't even know what you're like doing the science experiments.
That'll be me building. That'll be some twenty fourteen or fifteen building an electronic monstrosity of a looper and effects machine by cobbling together a bunch of other products and rewiring them. That actually leads me to.
I like this photos anyone.
Sorry, we're cutting to the anyone who wants to learn how to loop or need advice on busking and equipment and how to do all of that. It's like when I'm not performing, I'm building rigs in my head and
helping other people with it. I haven't turned it into a formal business just yet, Like the whole building custom things for people who are building instruments, but anyone who wants to learn how to loop, how to how to busk, and some some tips for it, feel free to hit me up and I will talk to you, you know, just like I've been talking to the get here all day, you know, until the cows come home. It's just for the love of it and for the passion of it.
Dude. Fuck, yeah, that's what you're kind of hope. I hope you get I hope you get some d MS man. If if some if you if you get connected with some people through this, that would be really awesome.
Oh I did, absolutely, And yeah, fucking get nation. Man. It's a real, real cool I really didn't expect to just get through the first time I called.
Look at this picture of you, like you're like sitting down with the times and you're like looking away and you have your hand on the on the back of your neck. You look so bashful.
This is you.
Gotta you gotta cool. You got you got such a you have like such a great like like I'm like, like, I don't know how errated this is, but you've got a great like artist image of like a sweet, sensitive, brooding man.
I like it and That's my biggest achillity here is like self perception, like understanding what's good or bad about what I'm doing and trying to create an artist image. Like I've just bought all this kit to do like quality live streams and stuff, and I just don't know what to put on as my main that's my main thing, you know. It's yeah, like that that photo shoot was supposed to be a trio shoot and then our basis
couldn't make it. So me and my body were offered a fat joint by the by the person shooting, the person who owned the gallery or the studio. And there are some fucking hilarious shots from that, like we we were just out of our minds. There's a shot where I'm like pushing out my stomach and my buddy's like behind me, like like he's like he's cradling the baby. It's like it's a maternity s and ship. It's some funny, funny ship. But yeah, in those photos of I just
don't know. I don't know how to look in in fucking photos. Man, I have this pointing meat suit.
Yes you do, yes, you do? You you might not? Yeah, let me tell you this is the last time I tell you, Jack is you might not you might not be able to intellectualize it how you look in photos. But you you, you, you know how to do it. Your essence knows how to do it. You know what you're You're I I don't say this lightly, Jack, I'm just looking through your Instagram and I'm like this. You were born to be a star. You're the Australian Jack Mayor.
And I hope, I hope, I hope that one day, one day, John Mayer, do I say, Jack Mayor, I forget what I said. I hope one day John Mayer becomes the American Jack Shepherd.
I'd be having a very very good career if that happened. But uh, you know, a man can dream and uh yeah, man, Like if you're if you're ever in the in the same place at the same time, if I'm ever doing a concert where there are tickets, you know, free tickets for you in the in the gig nation, bro.
Please, that would be that would be cool. Maybe one day, maybe one day we can busk together. I'll play tambourine.
Oh that'd be sick. I'll have to get a bit of dragon costume.
See you later, Jack, Thank you for calling.
Uh one last thing though, there's no justification for killing children. There's just no. It's fucking indefensible, Big rock and roll.
Letter Jack Peace.
Thanks.
That was pretty cool. Yeah, I like I like. I like busking. I'll sometimes if I'm like in a place, I'll uh just and I see a bus girl, I'll just stand there and watch for a while. I'll watch.
I'll watch people watch. It is one of those moments where everyone gathers and you're like okay, Like I don't know throughout all the like crazy AI domerism and everyone being on their phones and like shit, there's something about just watching someone just like play music in a public park and everyone's like dancing and watching along, where you're like everything will everything will probably maybe be okay, and that's you know, that's good enough.
Hi.
Hi, what's your name?
Chunk?
That's a cool name.
Yeah it is. It's like my favorite word.
What's up, chunk? How's life?
Uh? It's going? I mean, it's my twenty second birthday today.
You sound like you're forty seven years old.
Well, that's that's reassuring. I feel like I'm forty seven years old.
Do you actually feel like you're forty seven years old.
Well kind of That's kind of why I called in, is because I feel like I kind of like ran life a little bit and now I'm like not thrilled with where I'm at, and I'm like, well, now.
What what do you mean you speed ran life?
Well, like, on paper, everything in my life looks like pretty good. I think, like, I I'm twenty two, I like live alone with my girlfriend who had been with for four years. I have a bachelor's degree, like a really good job and everything, but like really all I do is just like sit at home and play feef all day or like video another video game.
You're forty No, you're not forty seven or twenty two? How did you speed run life? You were like, what did you do? So like you okay, So like you're okay, you live with your girlfriend and you have a job. Yeah, and you're like, all right, I'm doing the whole I'm domestic. I'm I'm living a conventional domestic life exactly twenty two and I have but I and I didn't. I didn't go crazy enough. Is that what's going on?
Exactly? Like kind of kind of like that, but I never, like when I was like doing all that stuff. Like I went online college, so I didn't really like kind have that like typical like college experience, you know, which I didn't really want at the time, and now I kind of I kind of do want it, but like I also don't want to go into debt to like get another degree.
No, that's it's really stupid. Well what do you do?
Yeah? I like work with software for like a construction company. It's it's like boring, and I honestly like I'm trying to find a different job that like wouldn't be as boring because like I do like what I do. I just think it's like the job, the specific job I don't really like.
But you're you're you're a software engineer.
Not not like a software engineer. I just like support software, so like if there's an issue with it, like they talk to me right, like like project manage and all that stuff.
Do you work from home?
Yeah, which is sweet, but it's also like I say, at home all the time. You know, it's kind of like an adult double edged sword.
And if you will you work from how do you like work nine to five?
Yeah? Yep, basically okay.
And what no, Yeah, going back to college, going into debt to have a nice time would be a exact Do you make and you make money at this job?
Yeah?
Yeah, I make good enough money. I mean it's not like the best, but it's better than a lot of people.
Okay, so what do you You just want something? Like you want to do something cool and exciting.
Yeah?
Yeah, but every time, like I have like desires to do stuff that's cool and exciting, I just like can't like pick myself up enough to do it. You know, Like I I have this thing every day and it's like why I've been like non stop listening to the show because I sympathize with a lot of people. It's like I just like want to do all this stuff, but like and I have like time, sometime and resources to do it. I just like can't like pick myself up to like actually go do it. You know what I mean?
Here's you. I don't have to say that I am not a doctor, and so I won't although I'm not a doctor, however, I'm like truly my my brother from a personal experience. Have you considered and don't take it from me, go talk to a you know whatever person, But do you just like have fucking ADHD.
I I haven't been diagnosed. I kind of a little bit suspect it. Yeah, but I actually have thought about going to therapy recently. I need to just pick my like once again, it's one of those things where it's like I know I need to do it, and I want to do it. I just like have to go through the actual steps.
So I mean, I'm only I'm only saying this because like I have it, and I have a ton of friends who have it, and it's like this is like just such a classic. Yeah, I mean, I'm not gonna say you got to go get on take a bunch of drugs. I'm not I'm not saying that. I recently started taking a bunch of ADHD medicine and now feel amazing all the time. And so I'm telling you to
go do it. But I mean it's worth it to go talk to a person about it because you know what it is is because everything here's here's the thing, right, Like it's like situationally, you can do whatever you want. You can go live in Denver for a month and yeah, hey and you know you're working, you see have money, so you can do it. I don't know what's your what's your girlfriend? Well, actually, hold on, what's your girlfriends do?
She's she's kind of in a similar spot, Like she has like a she actually just quit her job, but like it was like a daycare job that was like driving her crazy. So she's like kind of in a similar spot where like she has stuff she wants to do, but like does I don't know, And I don't really want to speak for her, but she, like I would say, kind of similar like sort of thing. Her Her anxiety is kind of like more what like her I guess
issue was. I don't know if that's like a mean thing to say, though, that's.
I mean, like in talking about like you and the specific thing that you brought up where it's like, Okay, I feel like I live the life of a of a you know, forty seven year old married couple. It's like, well, you don't have you don't have to I mean, what would you?
Yeah, no, I agree, Well.
You're telling me, You're saying I have things I want to do, but I just can't like bring myself to do them. What are the things?
Oh? Like mostly honestly traveling, Like I know, it's it's kind of stupid that the thing that The thing that prevents me from doing it the most is my job, Like even you work remote, Like I feel like if I was in a different time zone, it would kind of like ruin the experience of actually traveling, like having to do that. I can like take off like a week or so, but like I really want to do like the long term travel sort of thing. But I I've been trying to plan. I was looking at a
trip to Thailand maybe later this year. I think that's like that would like kick ass and like help me out a bunch.
Yeah, that would kick ass. You do have the problem of like your hours get all fucked, but I don't what kind of job that Like are you well, because he's my question is I mean you're twenty two, so you just started working at this company.
Uh, I've been there for a year, so like I actually that's like kind of what I'm saying too, is like I on paper, like it looks really good, Like I worked like full time through college, like I it didn't feel that hard. But like to an external person, that like looks really good. You know what I mean?
Are you doing are you are you doing something where you are where? Like I don't, I have no idea, what you doing your job? Dated? Why are you doing something where you're like constantly like interfacing with people throughout the day and you have to like bere to like respect respond to slacks at a certain times exactly, Okay, yeah sure, yeah, okay, so that makes it hard.
That makes it hard, yeah, exactly. And I like I would love to just like try to like go to Thailand and like not take off work, But then I feel like pretty quickly I would get like pretty tired of getting messages at like whatever like two am that having to get up and respond to it.
Yeah, that would suck. That would suck. But you're you have to, Yeah, you have time to make it to Thailand. I mean, why don't you go to like, uh, yeah, there's a lot of cool places you could go to that are on the I'm sorry, did you say where you live now?
I'm in Pennsylvaniam in the high Yeah.
Yeah, you're right, you're on you're on.
A s T.
There's a lot of cool places you can go on those on the on those hours. It's all of fucking South America. There's all of uh like Mexico and what you know, Guatemala and like there's adventures that like if you if you're just telling me you want to go on an adventure, HM, I mean I I've been UH working remote for five years and I had one time, like three years ago where I was having another existential crisis and I was like, I gotta go do something crazy,
So I went to UH. I went to Guatemala UH for like like a weekend UH and I like just filmed videos and stuff and that was fun. And as you know, that's on the same you can go there. You could go UH, Puerto Rico. That's a good point you can go to. I don't I don't know what's going on, so I don't want don't. I don't know what's going on hon Duras, So I don't want you to go there and die. And then in the news article it's like a gecko told him to go.
A gecko got him killed in Guatemala.
But this is but you know what it is is I actually don't even think I'm just projecting upon you. But I don't even think that this is like a oh I need a recommendation of a place to go. This is like a mental this is is Yeah, that's I don't even know why I'm talking about that ship because this is like a mental hurdle.
That's a good point too, though, because like I I think I just like get hyperfixiated on like one kind of trip, like like the month long trip to like somewhere fairy foreign. Yeah, like right right, and and that isn't what it needs to be though. No, that's what you're saying, and I I agree with that totally. Yeah, yeah, No, it is a lot harder like to like get myself to do things. I think you were right, Like I do just need to take that step of like going
to a therapist. I did last year, and I feel like he would. I actually like did have a time last year for like like six months where I was like doing every like I was like almost like in that like perfect little like I don't want to say grind, but like I was doing everything I wanted to be doing. Like that's kind of like the main crux of it is like I have things I want to be doing, but I end up just like scrolling on Instagram and watching YouTube videos and playing video games all day.
You know.
It's like it's it's the tough part is like getting myself to do the things I actually like want to be doing you know, like reading is like I want to read more. It's like all the typical stuff like read, work out.
Like you know what I mean, Yeah, take a but yeah take a start taking a bunch of of meth. It will help a lot to do those things.
Well, I already smoke abut unch of weeds.
So there's a lot of that. There's a lot of ship like this where it's it's such a it's like a Nike just do it thing. But also there can be some yeah, yeah, I don't go talk to a doctor. Man. I used to be in my head. I used to be in my head about uh yeah, there's some there's a lot of this is just like again, Nike, just do it. But now now just from a personal level, I'm like, oh wait, maybe there's a there's I mean, there's a lot of chemical ship going on. Yeah, definitely, go ahead, go ahead.
I've noticed it a lot in the last year. But there's part of me too that's like should should I be content? Like if this is the thing that like my it's I have a hard time reconciling, like if what my brain wants me to do in the current moment is like what I should be doing versus like what in like my I guess like my higher conscious mind thinks I should be doing. You know, like I almost feel like I should find like like peace and like happiness in the things I'm already doing, like all
the dumb bullshit I do. Like, you know, I like I'm in a very fortunate position to be able to wake up, you know, like five minutes after work starts and go make a bowl of yogurt and watch YouTube for an hour until I get a team's message, you know what I mean?
Yeah, but don't I want what's your name again?
Junk?
Junk? Oh yeah, you said that, Junk. Everything you're saying to me, and also the fact that you're telling me that that just the things that people talk about on this podcast are resonate with you. It's like, Oh, I I all those thoughts that you're saying right now, I've had all of them. I've I've been attacked by uh shoulds, and I've let you know, should kind of run my brain and mental whatever a lot. But fucking just how
do I say this? Uh? I want to say there's nothing you should be doing, and I do kind of I do like philosophically, I guess believe that. But yeah, well also it's it's like, what are we having this conversation for. Just go to fucking just go it's on the thing, d Just go on the thing. Go on, go to go to go see a therapist or a psychiatrist and find out if if they're like, hey, you probably have this thing you should take medication for, and
then go on the trip. You know, there's no I don't. Yeah, I mean we could philosophize size about this all day. I personally, I mean, I am blessed enough to have ran ran a gamut and that what you're talking about is is a balance of that I've personally been trying to find in my own life for a long time, and uh only only only, I'm telling you, extremely recently have I felt like I've found that balance? I'm like extremely recently, like I'm talking like a month. Have I
felt like I found some balance? And it might fall apart and I might be Yeah. I always, I always feel like you got there and then and then a little, an little demon shows up and he's like, hey, remember me, I got hot?
The little demon of Instagram reels or something like that.
Yeah, but I don't know, just like, yeah, go talk to a fucking real person and see if they are like, hey, you got to take pills.
Yeah, and definitely I I have been that for a long time.
Yeah.
It's a it's a real cat and mouse game because you like, you know, you gotta you know, you got to make an appointment for a thing, and then you go and then there, and then they and then they send you a form and the second you make a phone call and they send you a form and you see the form and it like you see one question in the form where you're like, oh, crap, in order to answer this, I gotta find this other information. You're like, it's over. I'm never I'm gonna die without ever doing this.
Yes. Absolutely.
Have you ever been on a trip?
Uh? Last year my girlfriend I went up to Maine for like a week. That's kind of the same trip. I think I need to just do. You know, we we like have a trip up to Massachusetts with my family. And that's a hard thing too, is like I always have like, well, it's not hard. I don't know, I don't know how to say it really, but it's like I have these like family trips that like take away from like I don't know, I want to say, disregard that it's it's that's fine, that's.
Like, no, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know exactly what. Uh I think I know exactly what you want to say, but feel bad expressing, which is like you're on the family trip, but you're like and in your head you're like, I should be grateful I'm on this family trip, but in your gut you're like yeah. But in your gut you're like, yeah, but this ain't the sauce. You know.
Yeah, I've done the same exact thing like ten times. You know, I've gone to the same little town in Massachusetts like ten times.
No, here's because I also believe this in a sense of I like having this conversation we're happening, we're having because I kind of feel like I know where your brain is at and you're you're five years younger than me, and uh, I know what you're saying because you're eventually
gonna get to a point. I think this is part of getting older, is like yeah, like if I you know, I've been on a billion trips and done a billion things where I'm like, oh, yeah, this is the sauce, and then later and then even after that felt again only up until very recently, still after going on all those trips, felt unsatiated and felt like, oh, I don't
know what I'm doing? Am I doing what I? Only very recently have I locked into a life rhythm where I'm like, Okay, I feel confident about this, and now that I'm there, ish I maybe who knows? Who knows? Whatever? Do I now feel like if my mom and stepdad wanted me to go with them to Maine and I and I only now after I've gotten all of that out of my system and felt like I'm on a nice track and I'm not preoccupied with what I should
be doing. Can I now be like fully in the moment with my mom and my stepdad as I should or I I yea as you know, you know what I mean. But it takes. It takes, It takes getting a little older, It takes finding a nice rhythm for yourself and your life that you feel good about, and that just that just takes time. So don't you don't have to feel bad about what you're feeling right now. But you know you'll, you'll, you'll fucking get there, you know, it's I don't I don't want to be too reductive
and say, oh, you're twenty two or whatever. But just because I know the feelings you're having in your brain right now, I just I couldn't it like I'm it took five years maybe more. I don't know if I'll revert back to, oh I'm doing the wrong thing. I I only I've only peaceful or I've only felt peace
for the last month of my life. Everything else has been yeah, yeah adhd crazy brain scramble, but yeah, but yeah, Dode, You'll I think you'll get You'll get there, but uh, I've got to you gotta know, I think, but you got you gotta put yourself out there. And and I don't know if you get to that point with medication or if you get to that point by just Nike just do it, but uh, yeah, you'll get there. Like when you're thirty and you're and you've traveled all these
places and you've done these and you're not here. It's also I think that's a young man's game. Uh, that's is wondering.
It's like I I all these years that like I don't know, I don't necessarily think there's like a right time to be doing all those things. And now like because I did all those things, I have like more of an ability like financially to travel. But like it's like I almost feel like I like focused on like the uh the like work like part first then that I should that was like a mistake.
But no, that wasn't a mistake at all. That was not a mistake at all. Because here's the thing, uh going to like all this ship that we're talking about, Like it costs money to do, and the there's there's a nice balance to strike between like putting your head down and getting your your bag and trying to set up a nice financial foundation for yourself and then like
you know, having having fun. But it's so much easier to have fun and do the things that you want to do when when you're not you know, stressed out about about about money. It is it is important. And also you know, get this when when you and your girlfriend are married and thirty and whatever, and and you because you got your money up and you put it in the fucking stupid index fund or whatever, and you know, thirty, you have some money. Now you can really fucking do
whatever the hell you want. So I don't think you made any mistakes. I think you did it. Sounds like you did things really well.
Yeah. It reminds me of the caller the other week. I don't know when when it was for you, but it was only a couple of days for me in podcast world. But it was the one that worked at his father's painting company and you were telling him just to like work there, And like, I resonated a lot with that because it was like that was like, what I did? You know that is the right advice?
Wait, I'm actually I'm actually, I'm actually so you know what's you know what's so funny is I I I know, I don't know you, but we have so much of what you're talking about. I really resonate with like the bright your brain and it's so it's so funny because uh, I actually got a lot of flak in the comments section. Really whatever what I said to that guy and you know, here's here's and I actually I was thinking of a
lot and I talk in my real life. I talked to my like friends and family about that call and about uh that I was getting flack for it because I like and I was trying to understand it. Maybe that specific caller could have done like some things different, like could have I don't know, found a better paying job somewhere else, or gone to trade school or something. Here's what. But what upset me about the flack I
got in the comments was not that people. I'm so I don't get please if you disagree with things that I say in this podcast here, I would be insane if I wanted nobody to ever disagree with me. But I wanted I wanted like, I wanted feedback. I wanted like alternative things well people. If people in the comments were like, GEK, that's stupid and you're being toxic and and and when I read that, I'm like, yeah, what what?
When I read that, I'm like, uh, you know what, I will fully, fully fully accept that I was that I was being whatever, but I want to but I'm what, do you what do you think? I hate when people said I hate when they're like you're wrong, but they don't come up with an alternative. Yeah, not a reason, but like here, like, Lyle, what you said to this guy was wrong. Here's what I think this guy should do.
Because if I saw a comment where someone was like, Lyle, you're a fat idiot and I and I disagree with you, and I think what you said to that kid was harmful. Here's what I think instead he should do. I would read that and then be like, oh, you know what, you're right, I actually am a fat idiot and this comment or is correct. I like that idea. But when it's just hey, you're a fat ida and you're wrong, I'm like, come on, give me, like I just I was.
That's what bummed me because I wanted I wanted to hear in the comments like what other people thought that that kid should do, so that way I could read it and be like, Okay, you know what these people are rights, Yeah, definitely, but but I you know, don't get me wrong.
He should definitely have asked his dad for a raise. I was like, say, I like audibly gasped when I heard. But it was like it at the same time, like that mindset of what you were saying, like that is I was thinking about it of like you can just do that, Like you can just work that much and still have all the other things that you want. And it's like that kind of resonated with me because it's like I have I don't even have to go out and paint cars every day. Like I'm I have all
this time at home to be like doing things. I just like haven't you know, actually done them yet. And obviously, like you know, we talked about how I can fix that, but it's it's like I I definitely think that that that people like get really fixated on, like the ideal or like one track of life where like a lot of people don't have that situation like where they have a company where they can actually work at and like learn stuff, because like that that will benefit him for
many years to come. Like it just he's not just like working at like CBS or something. Nothing wrong with that, but it's like there's like less upward mobility at like a CBS versus like your dad's company. You know.
Yeah, I was talking. I was talking to my friends about that call, and they were like and and a lot of them were like, eh, he should probably like see if he can find a job that's more than minimum wage or like maybe try going to a trade school or like you know, the government has certain programs where they're like pay for you to but they were again and I was talking to my friends about it, and then I was like, oh, maybe you're right. Maybe I shouldn't have told him to work for minimum wage.
But out of comments, I was like, I was like, well give me, you know, I don't I'm totally to be happy. No, I was like, I was like, I'm happy to be wrong, but I want alternative.
Yeah.
It's like do you know the comedian Mark Norman. Yeah, yeah, First of all, I shouldn't be reading internet comments in the first place, but I I listened to Mark. I listened to Mark Norman. This is how I feel about like internet comments when I read them about myself. Like Mark Norman was talking on like some podcasts once and he was like, sometimes I read a comment on my stand up and it's like, uh, you know, you suck and you're not funny, and I'm like ah or whatever.
And then sometimes they read a comment that's like this guy needs to work on my on his delivery, and I'm like, the fuck, maybe I need to work on my delivery, you know what I mean? Like something, yeah, exactly, you know.
Yeah.
Anyway, do you ever, like, do you ever like read comments? Or I get off a podcast like this or not podcasts or the Twitch stream and like go and like have a bunch of motivation to do stuff or is it just like you turn an offense, like back to normal.
Uh lately, well asked, Well, today I gotta do ship. But lately I've I've actually I deleted Spotify off of my phone so that I don't like check comments. I've I deleted Spotify, YouTube, basta, I delete I like, I don't. I deleted like Spotify, YouTube, Instagram, TikTok, email, like everything off my phone because uh, it's just there's just no it's.
Just this is Yeah, you just go to her. I would too if there's always people like I have a little photography Instagram, and anytime I post something, I'm like addicted to going back and looking if I got like one more like than I did the last time. You know, I can't even imagine, like at a bigger scale.
Do you know who doctor k is? Yeah, yeah, the healthy gamer guy, right, Yeah, he's dude, He's so awesome. I was watching, Yeah, I was. I was watching a video of his and he was talking about like, you know, if you make anything on the Internet, you get kind of like addicted. You get addicted to the there's there's
the whole like there's like a mental roller coaster. Of like numbers going up and down and up and down, and he's and he was like the worst thing that you could do is to just be constantly looking with no perpose, like I'm like, and I've not and I was doing that, and I was like, oh, I'm just I'm just stuck in this weird like dopamine t there's
nothing productive underneath what I'm actually doing. And he's and doctor Kay was like set up like one time a week to look at the numbers and go in there with like an analytical mind because it's one like analytics are like analytics are like important in whatever it is you do. But if you're if you're just going into them to like ride your emotional roller coaster, that's fucking stupid because there's nothing you can but if there's nothing
you can do in the moment. But if you're going into them with a pure analytical mindset and go, Okay, this is what worked, this is what didn't, and I will learn better for next time, then that's nice. But anything other than that, you're just riding a stupid roller coaster meant to make.
Exactly absolute.
Yeah, what's your name again, Chunk? Chunk? Hmmm, Chunk I'm all, I'm only saying this because I have ADHD, and I understand, and I feel like I have a nice understanding of the way that your brain has been working from what you're telling me. You might you might have ADHD. Dude, don't I don't let me tell you, by the way, don't let me tell you that. Don't let me tell you that I'm I'm telling you. I'm telling you that. No, I'm not even I'm not evens No, I'm not I'm
not a crossing. I'm telling you this just as a homie. Okay, you might.
I know I'm joking. I I I honestly, it's kind of funny because I think I've known that in my mind for a while. Just like I've been picking up on like things I do, like just like my NonStop like need to like fidget, Like literally right now I'm walking.
I paced across my apartment twenty times, and like I have a rubber band in my hand like I can't, like you know, I have to have something at my hands at all times or something like that, And just like not only that, but like a million other little things that I've noticed, so like for you for me to come on here and you clock it like pretty quickly. I feel like that. You know, that's that's real?
You know, bro?
I walk her. I was walking around and I had I have sunglasses and I'm just like holding one of the sunglass rims and I'm twirling it. I'm like, what the fuck am I doing? Or like anytime I have a cup, anytime I have a cup, yeah, I must just like a plastic cup, I must destroy the cup. I don't know why things things I've been doing. These are things I've been doing my whole life that I never ever even stopped to think about that I was doing exactly. Yeah, bro, you have any you know what
I don't you know what? I professionally diagnosed you know what? Fuck every I professionally diagnosed you with ADHD. And if you take, if you overdose on vibeance and die, I will take medical responsibility for that. You consume me if that happened, okay.
My family, My family will be in touch after I take two whole models.
I shouldn't, I shouldn't say any of these things to you, but I just like, I just so know again, I just know exactly what the thing is. So I mean, yeah, bro, you I talk. You go talk to a real therapist.
But yeah, I will.
I will.
I'm gonna I'll look at it right after this. But yeah, I've been thinking about that for a while. And it's also like I think it's definitely a big connection as to why like I can't like get myself to do anything other than like the thing that you know quiets my brain down for a little while.
You know.
And yeah, but also like on another note, like I've had this weird feeling I just want I don't know if you want to, if you don't mind if I bring something else up or not. I've I moved to the city here in Pennsylvania, and it's like kind of like always was my like dream to do it, you know, like not this particular city. I mean it's east and I don't know why I don't need to it's not
a big well, it's a kind of big city. But it's like always was my dream to like live in like a city and be able to walk and like do all this stuff. And it's like I don't I do it. Sometimes it's just like I feel like so out of place. I feel like that's going to be like the same way I feel like when I'm traveling to like, I feel like I'm like a still even
though I've loved care for like six months. Now, do you ever get that feeling like when you're traveling or like doing living somewhere or something like that.
Yeah, I mean, is that not the point though?
That's true? I don't know. Yeah. I think I just have this like unrealistic expectation that I'm gonna like be a local immediately or something like that. But yeah, I mean that's a good that's a good way of framing it.
Well, I mean, I I'll say this like, if you can there's a I mean, if you want to have a more I guess authentic experience, Like, there's a billion ways to do it. I mean instead of like like instead of like getting a hotel or something, you can go on CouchSurfing dot com, or you could stay at like a hostel, or you could like there's a lot like there's there's there's cooler ways to do it than like just getting at a hotel.
Yeah, in the hotel yeah yeah, yeah, Okay, yeah, I'll look at that whenever I whenever I get my trip planned.
Chun Yep, I've genuinely really enjoyed having this conversation with you.
Thank you all. I've been listening for like I think like four or five years now, but basically since you've started. I love it.
I love this podcast kick ass. Thank you man. M mm hmmm. Did let me know what you're fucking do? You go see a real fucking thing and then let me know if what they say, I'm curious.
I'll instagram DM you okay?
Cool?
Whenever I whenever I go.
Chunk, is there anything else I say? Is there anything else you wanna say to the people of the computer before we go?
Go?
Eagles?
Uh?
I I really always thought about what I would say, and that's only the only thing that ever came to my mind.
So go Eagles, beautiful, See you later, Chunk.
Yeah bye.
That was cool. I liked that conversation a lot because, yeah, I don't know sometimes like I mean, yeah, I'm like it is, dude, It is so funny because that guy is twenty two and I I I didn't clock that it wasn't normal to just destroy a cup that you have in your hand, or like chew on pens and destroy them or twirl with like I'm always fidgeting, And it was such a part of my life that I didn't even know it wasn't normal. That's a that's a trap. I think you can kind of get in with this
kind of shit. And I'm just realizing this, like I only I only came to these realizations. Like again, like a month ago. I'm twenty seven, this guy's twenty two, So like I do, I think that that'd be that's kind of a nice gift to like, because you're the only one, like like like you're the only person with you one hundred percent of the time, so you don't have and unless if like your friend, like you don't have that much data to know if your thoughts and
behaviors are quote unquote normal. And then every once in a while you're like, oh, this thing that was so intuitive to me is not what everyone doesn't do that you know, this is helpful information to have. Hi, Hello, Hi, what's your name?
June Bug?
June Bug, june Bug. This is this is not going to interest you or anyone listening to this, But there is a super Smash Brother's melee player named Junebug who is revitalizing the game right now because he's proving that Donkey Kong can actually be used as a competitively viable character to win tournaments. Do you know that?
No, that kind of sounded like an ad.
That sounded like an ad. It did, you know what? Good? I hope, I hope you know what? It was an ad. I hope that whoever listens to the ad I just did is compelled to go watch Junebug play Donkey Kong on YouTube. Anyway, what's up? June Bug has life.
There's a lot going on, but it's good. Kind of No, I just kind of wanted to talk about how my my dad just got married to my stepmom and you're all on the beach and we went to a bar and my new step uncle flirted with me really bad. He said that he wanted me, so, yeah, I got to figure out how to tell my husband and my.
Step mom your step wait step uncle, hold on, that's your my new step.
Uncle, my new stepmom's younger brother.
Okay, so your new stepmom's younger brother. He was flirting with you.
Yeah, we were all at the bar and he was getting increasingly touchy, and I had another family member like get me out of it. But that was whenever all the other all the other family left because my dad and my step mom went to go on their honeymoon, and he was like touching on my waist, grabbing me, and I had to just remove myself from the situation.
But we were all driving together and on the drive home, I asked if anyone wanted to Taco Bell and he said that he wanted me, And I'm like, oh, okay, who is do you?
Did you? Was this this guy's like first time meeting you.
No, I've known him for about six years, and then he did he he knows that I'm married.
Wait, so you've known this dude for six years and then all of a sudden he just starts flirting with you.
Yeah, well, he was supposed to get married this year, and I think my dad's weddings set him off. And my husband's deployed, so I think it was just a mix of like alcohol feelings and then oh, her husband's not here, let me get my move in. But I need to figure out a way. Well I'm gonna tell my stepmom obviously, but I got to figure out a way to tell my husband because he's deployed, but I don't want him to freak out. I talked to my
mother in law already. She knows all about this, but I'm like, I don't really know how to tell him without freaking out because where he's at, she's kind of popping off, and.
I don't want to give him why. Well, wait, that's a stupid question. I guess I was gonna ask, why would your husband freak out? But that's a stupid question. Why why? I'm I'm trying to understand more about why you're hesitant about telling you your husband.
Well, so my husband was cheated on before, on his last deployment, before I met him, and I talked to my mother in law about it, and she's like, well, you should probably, you know, you should tell him, but you should wait until after he's back home. But he he's very protective of our relationship due to his prior being being cheat on.
Friar.
Okay, so when you say you're worried, he'll freak out, like what what is that?
I don't want family situations to be fucking weird, you know, because well we're a.
Little we're a little past that. We're a little past to family situations being weird. We're we're there.
Yeah, that's very true. It's if I know him, If I I don't want, you know, the next Thanksgiving or Christmas or you know, we always you know, go to my stepmom's house, her family's house, so my I guess my new step grandparents for the fucking what's the football tournament? I don't know nothing about football. It's Super Bowl? Yeah, yeah, And I don't want to go there and just have this tension. And I know it's not my fault. I shouldn't be worried, but it's like, fuck, I know. I
know my husband would try to fight a motherfucker. I know he would, So I'm like, I don't want to avoid that. But I think I am past that. I think we are past that. I don't know. I do have a therapy appointment coming up this Tuesday, so maybe I should talk to my actual therapist about that and.
Not well, sure, yeah, of course, I don't know.
That's just fucking weird because I don't know. Maybe this is less about like asking for advice, but like those feelings don't just come out of nowhere?
Do they want?
Like wanting to feelings the feelings that your I don't know what's going on. I don't know why. I don't know why your step uncle, Yeah, I don't. I don't. I don't know why your step uncle. Uh was was weird? Yeah? It is, it is weird. I'm I guess.
Yeah.
The part of this that I'm I'm curious about is again like the thing, the thing where you're worried about your husband, like freaking out because did anyone? I guess what I'm curious is like, did any you told your mother in law? Right? Not mother? Wait? Mother in law? Wait, not your step moms.
I haven't told her.
You even told your step mom.
Because she's on her honeymoon and I don't want to ruin it, but I am going to tell her.
Okay because Friday.
Because here's the thing, right is if is if we're going to keep doing super Bowls together and we're gonna keep doing Thanksgivings together, you know someone's someone's got to tell uh the step uncle, Like, yo, you gotta not do that.
Yeah. So I don't know. I only see him a handful of times a year, so like I could definitely avoid him. It's just he I've also so, my husband and I are married. We looked for his deployment and later this summer we're actually planning a wedding party and he's already invited.
He's invited.
Well yeah, they're like, they're all my family, Like, you know, I love my stepmother, you know, and I'm like, fuck, should I in our life like talk to him and be like, sorry, you're not invited anymore, but the.
Rest of your well, I well, here's the question. Here's the question. Here's the question. Here's the question. And this is is I mean, after this all went down, the do you want him there? If you don't want him there, then I mean, yeah, yeah, you don't want him there.
No, but here, So they're all close. And the thing is, so my step mom she's she has her brother, which is a twin, and then she has a younger set of another set of brothers that are also twin brothers. It'll be weird if I invite one twin but not the other because I'm friends with the twin. I don't know, it's like some sort of like twin. They don't go anywhere without each other.
Yeah, but yeah yeah, but like I mean, look, this guy clearly you know, overstepped uh his boundaries, right, and if you want and if you don't, and if because of that you don't want him at your fucking wedding. You know, that's that's an L. He's got to hold, you know, it's not like and also, look, is he really gonna is he? That's it? That's just that's just an L. You gotta hold. You gotta be like, hey man, look you were that was kind of weird. So I'm
not gonna write you to the wedding. What's he gonna do? Be mad about that?
I hope he does. He deserves it, to be honest.
Yeah, I get well, I understand from you. I understand.
Also that also opens a whole can of worms. Because I want to keep this on the down low. I'd rather just, you know, tell my husband, tell my step mother, you know, have you know, have my stepmother have a talk with my new uncle. Oh god, And you don't want it to be yes, but you're not interested in him. Yeah, if I don't invite him to my wedding, which he's already invited. I already sent out invitations, it'd be kind of weird. I don't know. That'll just invite attention and drama.
And you're balancing. I I see, okay, no, one hundred see what you're saying. You're balancing, like I don't want to have this guy at my wedding, versus I want the path of lease resistance. You don't want to You're not interested in like stirring up the family dynamics. You don't want to deal with the drama of the fucking whole thing. You don't want to stir the pot. You just want to have your wedding and not think about any crap. And you just you want you're you're you're
interested in taking the path of least resistance. Oh, of course, of course that's understandable. Yeah, let's understand. That's totally understand. It's totally you know, listen, here's the thing. If if you told me that you wanted to wage war on this guy, or or if you told me you wanted to take the path of leaks resistance, both both valid ways of going about your life.
I get. This is just a really tricky situation because I also have to take uh, my dad's new marriage into account, because what if my dad, you know, he's not this type of person, but what if he gets super fucking pissed off at him, and you know, the family dynamic in between you know, his new wife and his brother in law is strained it's just I just wish it never fucking happened. It's just so.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, No, it's a it's a it's a shitty position for you to be in, and now you're you have to deal with it, You have to figure out how to deal with it, and you just don't even want to have ever even have to deal with it in the first place, which sucks.
Mm hm HMMMMO.
But I don't know. I I guess, like, yeah, I guess, I get I get wanting to take the path of least resistance, But at some point someone's gotta sit, sit the guy down and be like, yo, you can't do that.
Because my thing is like, what if you know I wasn't family. You know, he was really touchy and up front, you know, if I wasn't family, is this a problem that's happened before with another woman and you know we just didn't know it. I don't want a whole family intervention. But I just really appreciate my step mom. You know, she's the older sister, you know, putting on her big sister voice and you know, laying down the law.
Mm hmm. So here's what I guess. I sorry, go ahead, you more to say, go ahead. Well, I guess what my thoughts about this are like, because you're in a situation where you're like, I just wish I was never in this situation. I don't want to deal with any of this crap like I don't like and then and and when you're in a situation like that, the path of least resistance is the is is very attractive path.
So look, I'll say here's here's the thing. I'll say this whatever, here's what I would say, whatever way of moving forward in this situation brings you personally the most amount of peace. Huh. And I don't know which way that is, because I'm not you, and this is however you want to run your life. But I would say, whatever way of running this situation brings you personally the most amount of peace, if that's the one you want to take. Again, I don't know which what that is,
because your decision, it's your thing to think about. But uh, I think I think it's a valid decision to make. It's a valid it's a valid thing to make. Whatever decision gives you the most peace personally, whatever decision that is, that's that's that's kind of what I think.
Yeah, It's just I'm kind of stuck in limbo. Now. That's why I ask, because this will all change as soon as, you know, my stepmom gets back from you know, her honeymoon and they actually have a conversation with her about it. It's just I'm just stuck in limbo right now. I know there's an end in sight. It just sucks waiting.
How long is your husband deployed for.
He's deployed for nine months and we're in the home stretch right now, so he's coming home soon. It's just I can't disclose exactly where he is, but he's summer very hot and is the political pisi there is not good. So it's also like he's dealing with a lot of stress there, and it's like, fuck, I don't want another thing on his plate.
Mm hmm yeah. Well, like I like, here's like at the very I'm sorry that this this is suck. This sucks that this is stressing all of you. You ate like you shouldn't be the one to be bearing the brunt of all the stress of the situation, you know what I mean? Like, if you want, like again, I just you if you want to like, how do I say this? Like you just because you're sitting here like, oh, I'm in this situation and I don't want to stare
the family drama. I don't want my husband to get up sat like I I if if you can, this might be like I really I hope this doesn't sound like reductive, but like do you, like you like you're allowed to shed the stress, you know, if you if you I really hope, I really hope this isn't sound reductive, but like if you you're allowed to like decide that you're not gonna let this stress you out and just be and just like live your life if that's what you want to do, you know, is that does that make sense?
Do you mean as like don't tell anyone or just.
Like no, no, that's that's not that's not.
M Is this like a more living let go type deal, like, oh what happened? It sucks, but I gotta move on with my life.
It's in the past, not necessarily, no, but again for you, like okay, like it's just what I said earlier, Like I I think I think you shouldn't be the one to like deal with the stress of the situation and whatever decision because look, I mean for some people It's like if you were to be if you were like, no, I want to like confront my my my steck, my step uncle about this. I want to tell the family.
I want to deal with other things, and like that's what's gooding Like doing that is what's gonna let me sleep at night, you know, that's what's gonna be the less the least stressful thing for me. Right, So like that could be for you the way of handling the situation that is that again helps you sleep the best and is the least makes you less stressed in the
long run. Right, I don't and I don't. I don't know you, and I don't know your brain, and I don't know how you think about ship, but like think about like I would, I would just throw all my options on the table and go which in the long what in the long term helps me, he gives me
the less amount of stress in the long term. Or you could be like or if you wanted to, you could be like, look, I just I'm just gonna fucking like minimize my interactions with this fucking guy over the years, and I'm gonna not think about it, and I'm to my husband's gonna come back and we're gonna live our lives together, and I'm just gonna whatever not make this whole thing, and maybe maybe that's what helps you sleep at night more, you know. But I'm just saying that's
the lens. That is the lens through which I would look at all of your options. I'm not telling you. I'm not gonna I'm not going to tell you to live and let live because I'm not and i'm not you know, I'm I'm not. I don't that's I'm not gonna give you advice on what exactly you should do. But I will say that as you're looking, as you're kind of thinking about, oh I could maybe I'll do it like that, the lens through which I would look at all those options is, well, what's gonna give me
the most piece? I would say, Okay, okay, does that make sense?
Well, yeah, yeah, this is it's already I've already I'm going to therapy on Tuesday. This is something I'm definitely unpacking with my therapist. So we'll see what's the best decision is. I don't know. My my mother in law, my husband's mother kind of just wants to sweep it under the rug and not do anything, but I'm like, oh, I don't really know, and I have right right, right, right, So there's just a lot of different avenues.
Okay, So if your mother in law says that okay, and then it's like how does that make you feel? Does that make you be like okay? Like when your mother in law says that, do you do you feel okay? Great? Hoof? I don't want to deal with any of this crap or do you feel like that doesn't sit right with me? You know? And I don't. I don't know the answer to that, but like that's an important that's an important feeling to like recognize, you know, like which what what
what option is going to make you go okay? Cool? You know?
M hm No, I felt guilt because my thing is, even though it might you know, pain my husband to hear it, I believe in like a completely honest relationship with open communication. So I don't know. I don't know. Uh, I'm kind of on the I don't want to start a family pot.
But like tell, well, can I tell can I say this to also? Like again, I'm whatever whatever it is that you decide to do moving forward. When you tell your husband, I know that you're saying that, like your husband is like a hot head guy. But like with your husband, when he comes back and you decide whether whether you know, like let's say, let's say you tell him about it, right and he goes Let's say let's say you tell him about it, and and you're like,
I'm fucking pissed off with this guy. Fucking and then your husband's like, yeah, fuck this guy, and your husband like whatever. But let's say you tell him about it, and then and then you're like, hey, this happens, but I just I it would make me feel the most peaceful to not make it a big deal, like what whatever, whatever way that you want to go about it, your
husband should be supportive of you. So if you go and you say, I don't want to make a big deal out of it, your husband should be like, Okay, I respect that, I respect your decision to go about whatever the fuck got to do this. I mean, he's gonna have his own opinions about shit, of course, and it's up to you whether or not you wanna take him. But like your husband, whatever, again, whatever you decide is the thing that makes the way about going about the
situation that makes you feel the most peaceful. I think your husband should uh be supportive of view and when whatever that decision is, I would say that's I think that's a healthy relationship. But I also I don't I could be wrong. Maybe maybe maybe it's healthier for him to challenge. I don't know. I'm I'm I'm I'm a gecko.
No, he he is a hot head, but his his initial reaction would be anger, not necessary, no, not at me, but like anger in general. But I know him, and he took an hour or two to cool off, and he'll be okay. He respects my decisions. Okay, he knows, he knows that I'm the boss of the house.
So very nice, very yes, how is uh, how is life going?
Otherwise it's going really well. I live in this house, so it's starting to get super fucking hot. But I started I started running last summer and I finally hit my goal of running a sub thirty five k. So that's like, that was my big goal. And my dog actually runs with me. I have a black lab she's about a year old and she's about sixty five to seventy pounds, and we just run. We just run around the neighborhood and run around town and it's so fun.
It's so fun. But now that I do struggle with a lot of mental health issues, you know, particularly depression and anxiety, and this is one thing that I discussed, you know, with my family, with my therapist, like exercise gives you on doorphins, you know, exercise be happy. Basically, exercise makes you happy. So it's definitely working and it's
made the time go by fast. And then I'm also really excited for our wedding because so only the parents know, only the parents and our family know that we eloped, so this is gonna be like a welcome home party and then surprise, it's a wedding. We're getting married or we'relready married. So I'm really really excited for that.
Very nice, very nice? Are you?
Then?
Yeah?
Go ahead?
No?
Go ahead?
Oh no, I'm just debating on what dress I want to buy because have you seen Star Wars?
Yeah? Well, wild I haven't seen the New Ones? Are you a big Star Wars? Fuck?
The New Ones? No prequel series?
Cool?
Patna wait?
I thought everyone? I thought everyone hates the prequel series.
No, oh, I love the prequel series. I don't like the sequels.
Oh okay, all right, go ahead.
No, no, but I want to I want to commission someone to make me Padme's lake dress in episode two, whenever they were on.
Naboo, I you I know what you're talking about.
It's like this yellow, pink and purple lilac color ombre. It's like the big floey dress that she has. Maybe maybe not, but I don't know. We're we're going for a tropical game because my husband's uh, his family's from the Caribbean, and we're trying to do something like with that theme, make it feel like a vacation whenever he comes back home. But I'm like, I feel like I want to stick out, stick out, like a sore throughout
sore thumb. But the thing is his family's all star wars nerds, So I think it'll be okay.
I don't know, you like, like, yeah, oh yeah, it's your wedding, fucking ye the space dress up as super Mario who cares?
No, that'll be that'll be dope as fuck, that'll be dope.
What's your name again, June Bugs? June Bug? Oh yeah, like the Super Smash Brothers melee player.
Or maybe maybe I'll dress up like them?
Who do they?
I don't know anything about Super Smash Bros. But who do they who do they name? Who do they play?
They play Donkey Kong?
Oh, you know what, I'll dress up as Donkey Kong for my wedding.
That would be cool, man, that'd be cool. And then your husband can dress up like Diddy Kong and then you can be like, Yeah, I'm the fucking boss of the house, dude, I'm the big Kong.
I'm also taller than him. He's five to one. I'm five four.
Ooh, I like that. I like it good. I like it. I like it good. I like a good woman taller than the man relationship. Every time I'm every time I'm on the Uh, Like when I'm like walking through this down the street and I see a couple and the ladies taller than the guy like pump my fist a little bit, I'm like, that's awesome.
Yeah, fucking short kings the night.
Rock and roll, rock and roll, Junebug. Is there anything else you want to say to the people of the computer before we go?
Yeah?
Uh, if you're a short guy, please pursue taller women. We like it. We do like it.
They exist fellas they exist.
They do. I'm married to one beautiful.
I'm married beautiful, take care of Jim Buggle, see around the universe. Congratulations on a on a lovely life.
Thank you, see you later, by bye.
There we go. It's for every see listen. If you're if you're five to one, if you're a five to one guy and you think you're doomed, there there there could be hope. That's uh, that's actually what the First Star Worries is about. That's why they call it a new Hope. It's about a five to one guy who gets married to a to a five four lady never goes on the line taking your phone calls. Every night, the repe goes to his side. He's teaching you a loud in the of your life, but he's not really an expert.