“I HOOKED UP WITH MY STRAIGHT FRIEND”

Hello, Yo, what's up?

Is this?

Gik?

Yeah?

Who is this?

I don't let me think of my name. I'm gonna go buy Aaron?

Aaron? What's going on? How can I get you?

Today?

So?

I have to take a med because I have epilepsy and something about this matters. It makes you like have crazy dreams because it's all FOAs for bipolar disorder. It's a psychotropic and I I was having a dream one day before I woke up, and I like, I peede the bed because I was dreaming. I was peeing.

That's not what you wanted to talk about. You texted me and you said you almost slept with your.

Yeah, no that I texted you twice.

Okay, yeah, we all be the bed. Yeah that's fine.

Yeah No, I almost almost with my straight best friend.

How did that happen?

He was asking me about it. He said he was a little curious, and I was like, okay, let's we can. We can try something if you'd like, And then we made out and then he almost like, no, it didn't actually happen. That's why I said it almost didn't. I didn't go any further further than like grabbing or anything. I don't know it's now that I'm saying out loud, it sounds kind of boring.

It doesn't sound boring, but it's it sounds like does your what what? So you're okay, I mean your friend wanted to try it? What was his review of of being gay?

I'm trying to think what what did he say? I remember he was like, okay, I'm not gay. It's like, okay, I'm straight.

You know what. I respect. I respect that. I respect the hell out of that to be like, you know what, I'm gonna give it a shot and see if I like it, and it turns out he did?

You know he?

I mean, that's I respect his willingness to uh to expand his universe, you know what I mean.

Yeah. It was a little surprising though, because he has been very openly and outwardly homophobic.

Oh okay, I I kind of I kind of It sounds like, uh, he is uh uh compensating.

He went so far in the other direction. He came back around how.

Long has he been like being homophobic for? And then what was it like when he was like, you know what, foh, I don't know why I've been hating. Let me give it a try.

It was for I mean this this was a couple of months ago. This is at the start of the year. But he has been homophobic for as long as I've known him. I I've met him last year and we become we became really close. And yeah, he's also he's also like he's also really one for like cuddling too. I was a little a little shocked when he asked me to cuddle the first time. I don't really talk so much anymore.

Uh listen, I'm know whatever, but I think this guy sounds a little gay.

That's what I said.

What.

Uh so, okay, you guys became friends. But did he know that you were gay?

Yeah?

Okay, did he like like did he like ream you about it or whatever?

He was a little uncomfortable to be alone with me at first, but I had to. I was like, what what is your problem? Like what is your what's your beef?

Mm hmm.

But yeah, like, I mean, it took him a minute to figure out, like there's nothing wrong with me, Like I'm fine, I'm not gonna like do anything.

I maybe it's maybe he was afraid. He wasn't afraid that you were going to do anything. He was afraid that he was going to do something like ask you to make out with him?

Maybe maybe that Actually that sounds Yeah, he's a really he was a real shitty kisser.

What why did you stop hanging out with him?

We just sort of lost contact. We we went our like own ways. I moved away, and we we just sort of stopped talking. I don't know the Yeah. Also, he had a really he got a really controlling girlfriend.

Did his controlling girlfriend tell him that he couldn't make out with guys?

No, but she was really suspicious of me and him.

Was he dating this girl? Was he dad? Was he dating this girl when you guys made out? But yeah, oh so so she was right?

Yeah, actually no, no, no, let me think of the time. It was a little bit before they started dating.

Oh okay, all right, that's a key detail.

Yeah. And then me and him went to Niagara Falls together, like with his mom.

That's the gayest thing YouTube done so far that you've told me.

Yeah, we went to Niagara Falls together. We went around Niaga Fall together, I mean his mom. Yeah.

And that's that's that's scarier than the than the kissing and the cuddling.

He we we had to like sit on a bed and she she didn't like that. Like his his girlfriend didn't like it. She wanted me to be on a different side than him.

Were you were you guys hooking up while he was with this girl?

No, it never went anything more than that. I mean we saw each other naked before and we had maked out.

So did.

Well what about you?

Like?

Did you like it? Sounds like you kind of liked this guy, Like did you like him or what was what was your deal?

I did like him, I did. I did like him, and he did like take a big toll on me, But I kind of I kind of got past him, especially after I was like, Okay, he's like a bitch.

What what was the definitive thing that made you decide he was a bitch?

The way I saw him treating women. I'd never noticed that till like I looked. I was blind I was. I had been blindsided for such a long time. But then I'd like finally put my eyes on it and I was like, oh, oh no, get out of here.

What was what was he doing?

Well?

I gotta think because this was a couple months ago. That's also another thing my med does that it makes my brain foggy. He well, also not also him being like a horrendous mama's boy, being like a being terrible to her, not not be being a mama's boy, but being terrible to his mom. But what he was doing, Uh, he would always complain about his girlfriend and like his the female friends around him. And I was kind of done hearing that. I was like, oh so what so what was it?

What was it that made you like this guy?

Me and him clicked at first, Like if it was just me and him one on one, we clicked. We had a lot of the same interests. We liked, we liked going to dead malls. Yeah, he was easy to talk to at first.

What did you mean when you said he took a toll on you?

He's very mentally draining that That's what I mean by a toll in what way? Like socially?

Mm hmm.

I don't know. I feel like I sounded and uh dumb right now?

Why Why do you hold on? Why do you feel like you sound dumb right now?

Because I thought I didn't. I thought I I didn't know what I was talking about.

No, we're just we're having a conversation. Don't sound dumb at all?

Yeah, okay, okay, who.

Do you have a crush on anyone?

Now?

What's your deal? Now?

No, I'm just kind of single and by myself, probably for the not for the better. That sounds that sounds makes it sound like I'm crazy, but I guess for the better.

What's this guy doing now? Do you have any idea? Or is do you just not keep any tabs on him?

He is staying at home by himself. Apparently he's like working for the the city not the city state for his mom because mom, uh, she she has a hard time going around the places by herself. But yeah, he's just staying home now. I tried to ask him to, like m hang out sometime soon, but he wasn't really interested.

Are you you said you're single for the better?

Are you?

Are you enjoying being single?

I'm enjoying. It's been good.

It's good. It's good. Is there anything else that you wanted to say to the people of the computer before we go?

Don't fall for your uh street best friend. It can save you a lot of time wasted.

Thank you for calling?

Yep, thank you?

Hello?

Hello, Hi?

Hi? What hey?

Hi?

Can you hear me?

Yeah?

Am I on your headphones or something?

No?

Sorry, it's just about. I'm on the Brooklyn Breads.

Jenny, you said you're on the Brooklyn.

Yeah, I'm on the Brooklyn Brids just walking down.

Are you there's a DJ on the bridge?

Yeah?

Man, he's going for it.

He's got a can of beer?

Is he? Is there like a concert going on or something?

There's like little old ladies dancing rooms?

All right, my concert? I think it's just sat up there.

Where are you from? Are you Irish?

Scottish?

Oh?

Okay, we're in Scotland.

Glasgow.

Oh I'm going to Glasgow in November.

Really yeah, yeah that would be Wait where are you going in Glasgow for it?

I don't know off the top of my head. I don't know off the top.

Of my head, but as okay.

But let's see here. I mean, Gemma, is there anything you have to talk about today while you're on the bridge. Has it inspired something within you to talk to a gecko about?

Yeah?

I thought I would call because like even when I was on the bridge, you know, I was like checking my phone there and look on Instagram and I saw that you were like alive, and I don't know, I just I've got this like busted up feeling in my stomach, and I like think it's like excitement, and I've never been in America before, so I'm like, wow, it's amazing. I also feel like that feeling is like dreads, Like it just seems too good. I feel like something bad is about to happen.

Your excitement, your excitement yeah, oh yeah yeah, your excitement it turns into dread.

Yeah, Like it's just like this horrible pet and my stomach feeling them. But like is that butterflies or is that like like you know, like even right now, I'm like anxious.

I don't know that I'm talking to you on the phone.

Yeah, that's happened. That happens to me. How long have you been in America for?

Uh?

Sex days?

Are you here by yourself? Yeah?

I I've got a friend from Pittsburgh who just moved to New York, so I see her about, but I'm just here.

Are you, Like, are you on vacation or are you? Like? How what are you?

I'm like, I'm tatooing a little bit, and I'm like mostly partying and walking about, but like i'll tastoo. We got to make some money, you're do you?

I'm sorry, I have no idea what you just said you said you're tapped in.

No, I'm a tattoo artist, so I'll tattoo while i'm here.

Oh, you're a tattoo artist. Okay, are you all right? So you're doing yet? Now I've heard about this. People will like go to different cities and like kind of kind of set up and do do a run tattooing people.

Yeah, it's a guest spot.

Yeah, yeah, I guess, guess guest spot. Yeah, I've heard about that.

I've been like walking about Times Square, Gavin Stecker's and business car wooring myself.

I l how's the tattoo how's the tattooing? How's the tattooing business been going? Have you? Have you been with the tattoo a lot of people while you've been here?

No, I've got one person tomorrow and then two at the end of the week, so it won't be too bad, Like it's not You can charge more money for tattoos in America than Glasgow. It's like more expensive here. So I think I'll be okay if I get a few people in, like, I'm good. You know, how long are you?

How long are how long are you staying in New York? For for them months, for the whole month.

Yeah. See, I was like, I'm incredibly lucky because I get to do this, so I should be happy, and I am, but I'm just I just feel like something fucking SHOT's gonna have like a catastrophe.

While I'm here.

Do you is that? Have you had a lot of catastrophes happened to you?

I've had like, like, yeah, I've had a few, like like you know, when you know where you're when your issues them from like math mom died like six years ago suddenly, and I think since then, it's just kind of like.

I don't know, it doesn't matter what I'm doing, I still just have this thing that, oh, someone's gonna die or someone's going to like something bad's gonna happen. It's like kind of a fucking buzz cow because I'm trying to have like a good time and that's why you be happy.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, No, I get that. I get that. I've had that happen before. No, Because you think there's like a thing where you don't want to let yourself get too happy or excited because that happiness and excitement could be taken away from you through some form of catastrophe.

Me absolutely exactly exactly.

What do you I've been talking about that in therapy myself, to be honest, what do you do about it? Well, I don't know. I've been thinking about this a lot because it's a it's a dumb way to live. It's really stupid, because what's the point of of what's the point of life if you're just gonna not allow yourself

I can't remember. There's there's another one right upstartism that's like, remember, well, person does that stuff, but it's supposed to be like the craziness and ship itsness of the universe and being soul bag and the ensign can happen at any moment if it supposed to like kind of like be happy with that because you have no control over it. But it's easier to see it than to fucking do it.

Oh yeah, all this ship is easier to say than do I. Do you know how many things I say on this podcast? Uh? And then two seconds later my brain is acting in a complete fucking way where it's like, oh, I just told people to allow themselves to be happy. I should do that myself.

As good as I say, not as I do.

What What are you gonna do in the rest of New York time? Are you gonna get it a bagel?

I've had a bagel. I had a bagel already, it was. It was all right. I think I ordered it wrong, but it was still good.

How do you order a bagel wrong?

I thought. I didn't realize that it was like sanguage options. I just thought the only thing you could put on it was cream cheese.

I don't know why.

It was just like a lot of different cream cheeses and I was overwhelmed and I just got a bagel with cream cheese, which was nice. But I can get that like pretty much anywhere.

Yeah, but what do you have anything on your Do you have anything on your new Wait, so this is your first six days in America. You've never been to America.

Yeah, it's fucking crazy.

What do you think? Like, what's your take?

I feel people are nicer than I thought, Like I got to old New Yorkers where like they don't what fuck with you? But I think it's uh, the first weird no offense. It's like really hard to find, like I don't know, just just like a grocery store. I don't know, but it's massive, like it's overwhelmingly fucking massive. But it's beautiful.

I've never seen it something like this in my life, And I.

Thought, I don't know, you know, when you see something in a movie so many times and.

When you get there, you're like, oh my god, God, like this is where the ship happens, which I think is also what makes me paranoid.

Really, So when you say you've never seen anything like this before, what do you What are you seeing here that you've never seen before? Because you are? I mean, Glasgow is also a pretty big city.

No, I mean it's not sorry, sorry, I just wanting someone.

And that's that.

I've never seen it and it's big and it's better. It's that's like glasses small, like our subway goes around in a circle, but it's it's a small city where like right now I'm like looking out onto the river. I'm seeing the buildings like they're fucking ginormous, but I can't Like I've been to London and stuff, but like this is insane. I feel like an ant in a good way.

Is there anything else that you're going to try to do while you're here?

Uh, this tattoo. I think that's the main thing. I got a tattoo and just walk about the city like like right now, I can't believe this is for free, you know, like need to charge me. I just got on the bridge. I'm seeing like the best sights ever.

Oh, you can't believe that they don't charge you to walk across the bridge.

Yeah, I feel like I feel like I've been charged for so much stuff here, Like I do you know what, Actually, Joe, I've got I've got a vape like at shop I lost Mary and it was thirty dollars.

It's like five dollars where I'm from, which is insane.

Yeah, New York City. If you want to leave your house, you're spending at least like one hundred dollars. It's kind of insane.

Fucking hell. Yeah, expenses that get live cool?

Well, Uh, what's your name again, Jemma? Go ahead, you were gonna say.

Something, Yeah, I'm gonna say I just I feel I feel like that betterman from just talking to you when I cross the bridge.

That was nice. Oh cool? Yeah, No, I mean it's it must be picturesque. The water is uh, probably have has the moonlight on it. There's someone you haven't seen him in pee in public yet?

Uh. I think someone that I was on the subway with it definitely tests themselves. Smelts go bad. No, I've seen people pee in public before you get out everywhere.

And isn't it beautiful? Gemma? Is there anything else you want to say to the people in the computer before we go?

Oh, there's this Terence mechanic courte that I like where it says you got a fuck?

What is it you?

Terrence m there's a Terrence McKenna quote that you like. Yeah, sure, what is it?

Yeah?

I can't remember it. Set it's something about like you got love life, take it. I don't have a fucking note something like that he has.

There's this one quote where he's like, man, so trippy, man, this is crazy man. Sorry, all right, thank you for I.

Die. Man.

This is my oppression of Terrence McKenna. Yo, it's a fucking crazy man. This is crazy. WHOA, Sorry, I'm sorry, I'm not sorry.

From My name is Joe.

Hello, can you hear me?

All right?

Yes, sir? What's going on? What's your name?

WHOA?

My name is Dan. But what's going on with me is just uh, I'm not gonna put it. It's it's a little hard to uh to say in public, So that's why I walked away. But it's I feel like sex is probably the worst drug.

You feel like sex is probably the worst drug.

Maybe for me is what I should throw on there at the end.

There, keep keep going, keep keep speaking your peace.

Well, it's just that, you know, like the the absence of having someone there, you know, to to share time and I guess energy with it. So you're horning, yes, but like maybe too horny, like two times one day, you know, it's a.

Little I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Did you just do you just say that?

Uh?

Two times one day is nothing? All right? You're doing okay, You're doing good, don't you?

Partners?

Though?

Oh I think you said two times jacking off?

Well, no, two times one with each part.

So wait a minute. I'm confused because the way that you're talking, I can't tell if you are having too much sex or not enough sex in your brand.

Maybe the problem is I want more, but like averaging three or four times a week with two to three different people, but like usually sometimes the same people. But it's still you.

Know, okay, so you're having a lot of sex. I guess is that it sounds like a lot of sex.

But I also like it's meaningless though, and that's why I feel like it's the worst, because how do you it's great for those moments but what is acculminated or.

How do you how do you meet these sex people?

Well, apps was the easy way given them gay by that actually netted bad results to it again, So lately it's been in person.

Where are you going?

Different bars, some more more dingy than others.

But uh so, I mean, what's are you what's your concern here? Are you concerned that?

Uh?

Like?

What where does your concern lie?

I guess where's the end? Like you know, it's like drinking its own drug. It's you know, what's what's.

It gonna get me?

And where's you know? Like, but I can't seem to not want it?

What do you mean it's what do you mean it's gonna get you?

Like?

It doesn't make me happy to have like two or three guys filling that space, you know? Like, well that sounds wrong. I meant like like they are they are.

No, So uh, every week you are having multiple guys fill both physical and emotional holes for you.

It's literal sense.

You're right, Yeah, where does it end?

Uh?

That's a good question. I don't have fun fucking Oh my god, it's funny. I've thought this myself. Where does it end? Because it's like food or jacking off. Is it's not like you do it once and then you're like good forever. You just do it or constantly all the time. And uh, where does it end? I guess it ends when you die. I don't know where it's supposed to end. I don't know. This is an interesting question. Where does it end? I mean, do you want to

Like?

What where do you want it to end? That's the real question.

I'd like it too, Like I think I could be happy with one partner, though I am a little on the needier side.

I would think mm hmm.

I mean that's the That's my real answer to that is it ends where you want it to Like, it doesn't have a natural end. You can have sex, you can go on grinder and fuck people. Well I didn't take every single day forever? What if?

Not?

Where? Where are you? Where was? What's what if?

Not?

Grinder? Tender?

I just grinder? But you know, I don't know, don't want to, don't want to seed the stereotype.

Yeah, dude, it ends where you want it to end. So I would sit around and think where you want it to end.

I did like the food analogy, though, I think it's a mix of diversity of like what's exciting, but also like I feel like the excitement for me doesn't need to come from like difference, It just needs to come from, like, you know, something real. So I guess I am looking for a real relationship.

That's just.

A little tough.

Do people Do people do.

Real relationships on grinder? Or is it just sex?

Well, so, I don't know if I've ever seen a good relationship come out a grinder, but I'd like to believe it could be more. I mean, I've had nice conversations and I did have one. Okay, it didn't turn out.

Well, it was not a good mix.

Well, listen, man, as they say, don't stop believing.

I will stop believing.

Don't stop believing that you can find your perfect grind your boyfriends.

That that sounds a little hopeless. But maybe.

What's your name again, Joe?

That's what I said.

But Dan, are you upset that, by the way, your first name is Joe? All right, It's it's not.

Like, yeah, because I told your bot throng thing.

Yeah, I don't think you're putting yourself. I don't think you're blowing up your spot by saying Joe. It's a pretty common name. It's not like it's Ezekiel or something. Even if it was, there's probably at least like five other Ezekiel's. I'm just gonna call you Ezekiel for the short rest of this call Ezekiel. Is there anything else you want to say to the people of the computer before we go?

I would say, you know you were talking about love and not giving up there. I would say people should think better of each other and reach out to those near you because you never know who might just be looking to have new friends or around the corner. There's a lot to do outside your house, so keep keep.

Looking people new friends as you call it. Oh, okay, whatever, all right, take care, Ezekiel.

Thank you from Aaron. Hello, no way, you picked.

The what's up? What's your name? Sir?

Oh Man? I'm Aaron?

Aaron? How can I get you to there? What's going on?

Oh man? Dude? I need some relationship advice?

Okay? How old are you, Aaron?

I'm twenty one.

Okay, I will try my best. I don't know how great I am a relationship advice, but I'll hear what's going on?

Oh man, dude, I'm with this crazy hit dude, Like she is suicidal and and really I'm not with her right now. Like we broke up like maybe a week and a half ago, dude, but we were talking for a month and a half. And I don't know what it is, dude. I just I feel like I can't go without her. But and I feel like she feels the same way. But how suicidal she is it it throws me off, dude, because she wants to talk and then she's all upset with herself and with me.

Okay, So this is a girl that you were dating for like a month and then it's kind of an on again, off again sort of thing. Yeah, okay, And and like when she like does she get upset with you over stuff?

Over like the littlest things, dude, Like I live with my my best friend from high school and his girl, and just trying to talk to him about our relationship seem upset her. And I don't know, that's my best friend, Like, you can't expect me to not talk to my best friend about what's going on in my line?

Like she gets upset when you talk to your friends about your guys' relationship.

Yeah, Uh, why.

Do you think you can't live without this girl?

I don't. I don't know, dude. That's my problem is I don't. I don't know why. So it's like, especially after it only in a month and me even talking to her.

Yeah, I mean, like, here's the thing, and it's it's truly like it sounds like this girl is going through like, uh, you know, a tough time and a lot of like genuine mental health issues that she's gotta like kind of figure out, you know, And you guys are young and you got time to fucking figure that shit out. But you know, in the meantime, if like her, her mental health issues are causing uh, you know, you a lot of distress.

Uh.

I don't know if it's a super good idea too kind of uh hitch your trailer onto. You know, a person who's kind of going through some instability, it might be better to give them some space to work out their own ship.

I try to do that, but she keeps texting me and calling me.

Yeah, but you yeah, but dude, I mean you you get to establish your own fucking boundaries and like what you are willing to respond to and put up with and all of that, Like, that's that's up to you.

Man, I want to put up with it. I just it doesn't seem like she wants to. But at the same time she does. It's like mixed signals.

What else is going on in your life?

Man? I'll say I feel kind of useless, dude, because I sit up at the smoke shop, I WORKOD and I just I don't know. I don't I don't have my life, I don't have my iv.

It, Okay, Because dude, if you're feeling you if you're feeling useless and you have low self esteem, then of course you're going to be like, I need somebody to save me and to make me feel like I'm not a piece of shit, you know what I mean. And you'll take anything and you'll put up with anything because you feel that way. So you don't want to feel that way?

Yeah, what.

How do you not?

How do you go about not feeling that way? How do you go about not feeling like you're piece of shit? I don't know, I don't know. Probably I guess doing certain stuff. What were you going to say? You were gonna say something?

Oh, man, I don't know. I'll just say I just feel like it's better when I'm with here. I don't necessarily feel like such a piece of shit, but oh I want to feel that way, not with her. I guess why do.

You feel like you're a piece of shit when you're alone?

Just because I don't feel like I've ever really done anything with my life. I've always worked fast food jobs or like right now, like I said, I just sit up at this smoke shot can get like five customers a day. I go home, and I'm on probation right now, so I really shouldn't be drinking, but I'll go home and sucking as.

What are you on probation for?

I got caught with some cocaine?

M hmm were you? Were you selling it?

No?

I really just left my weed dealer yourselves and I had it on me, So I got caught with both weed and cocaine. But they weed out just getting the cocaine charge.

Yo? Do they do? They have like ankle monitors that prevent you from jack and off, like cause that's something you can get sentenced to, is house arrested without jacking off, And they put like a little monitor around your balls and if they sense that any com has left them. There's a little that alerts the police.

Is that really a thing?

What do?

What do you want to with your life? Like if you could do anything? Like what do you want to do? Because if you're just sitting around like, oh, I haven't done anything with my life, it's like, well you haven't even It's like you're getting pissed off of yourself. You haven't reached the goal that you don't even know what the goal is.

I've never been very goal audience. It's the only goal I really ever came close to having. I wanted to raise cards for a while. But the problem with me not getting my license in my ID is my parents weren't even married when I was conceived, so I was given the wrong last name and they changed the burchher tiskets, but they never changed the social Security card and now

Yeah, bureaucracy is annoying. Is that preventing you from getting other jobs? Yeah, what the fuck. What's wrong with your papers?

Uh? My last name is different on my Social Security card than my versiontiska.

And when you go down to the DMV or whatever and you try to fix it, they tell you to fuck off.

I mean they don't necessarily sat fuck off. They just they bring a photo ID or these type of papers. And like one example was I was supposed to bring some medical records and I went up to the hospital ask for my medical records and they printed out to this piece of paper. I thought, this was it. I can finally get a change when I go back up there. My bad, if my voice is really shaky right now.

That's fucking crazy. I've never heard of this before.

Yeah.

Uh but again, I mean, okay, bureaucracy aside, Like what you keep saying that you haven't done anything with your life? What do you want to do with your Like what do you want to do? You know, like if you had your Social Security card, what would you do?

I don't know. I guess the only goal over kind of wanted was to be a race car driver, But I don't even know how to go about that, especially without a.

Have you ever seen the Ballad of Ricky Bobby?

Yeah, that's what made me want to be a race car driver.

Honest Ah doesn't he How does he do it?

He was working on the pit crew and one day the driver just fucked off and he was like, I'll drive and get some driver's sipting when first place?

All right, maybe if you watch that movie fifty times you'll figure out how to do it.

Oh I have, I can, I can quote it all. If you ain't first or.

Last, I mean, I don't know, man, what you like? That's your only thing. I don't have anything else.

I guess I really I don't know what to do with my life. I'm liking the smoke shop, but I'm just making enough money to get by, like still living with my best friends from high school. I don't know it'd be cool to own my own I guess, yeah.

You could do that, not right fucking now, but I mean, you know you're only twenty one. You can work at the smoke shop for another decade before you open your own. Let's try to enjoy life. Well, you could sell cocaine. You probably shouldn't do that.

That's another thing too, I'll go back to doing that and I don't know, like I'll smoke leave for a while or too. And now I can't even rather.

You gotta do I'm I've been you know, I'm gonna, I've I've I made a goal, uh for this stream that I haven't been thinking about. My goal was to not hold it back. So I'm not gonna hold it back. You gotta do something, man, you gotta do something, uh, because you can't just spend the rest of your fucking life just being like like every like like at this point, it's like, are you just gonna wake up every day and go, I'm a piece of shit. I'm not gonna do anything.

I don't want to, but that's what I've been doing, and I hate myself for it.

So there's gotta be something, dude. There's gotta be some fucking action in the real world that you can take to get yourself off of this path. I don't know what it is, but it's gotta be something.

I even try to get a job with some construction crew and I don't know that. I'm I've never done though. I did a little bit of framing one like a week. Maybe I don't. I'm just I'm not built for that. I'm just skinny little guys fucking I don't know. Maybe that's just all the self hate talking. But I, like you said, I want to try to do something. I just like I don't. I don't know what to do.

Dude, I swear to God. I mean, just pick something, just anything, anything at all.

You know.

I tried to get a warehouse in Austin and that didn't do me no good because I didn't have any ID. I really need to get that straightened out before I try to do anything. And with how many times I've tried. I've given up on it.

I don't know, man, I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know a single thing about getting your Social Security card in order.

It's a hassy.

I'm sorry, man, I I I just just something, man, goddamn, I'm like, try try something, Try anything except like, I know it's hard and the bureaucracy is killing you, but just try anything except for sitting around, you know, hating your life all day. Just anything, my friends, throw something out. I'm trying to play tennis with you. You're not hitting the ball back. Give me something.

I'm not mean, You're right, I definitely need to try a lot harder than I'm just I'm sitting on my ass, excepting that I still when that shouldn't be the case.

No, no, no, no no. You're young, you have a head and two arms. It sounds.

Try, but they wouldn't even take me back to the way I was.

Trying to get You're trying to get a job at Sonic Well, I.

Worked there for a while, but I quit because they were just doing me dirty pay wise hours was.

How did how did you quit? What was the way that you quit that upset them.

Uh.

I don't remember what the manager said, but I said something back, and she thought I was joking, and so she made some kind of snarky comment about what I said, and then I just blew up and started going off on it in front of the whole story like new employees and everything. And then she said something about pay, and I was like, that's why I'm not even getting

What's your name again?

It's Aaron?

And is there anything else you I say to the people of the computer before we go.

Uh, I don't know. Don't fuck with crazy bitches there. There's just more stress on your.

Life, all right, take care and good luck, keep too, man. Hello, Hey, what's up?

There was this guck, ma'am.

Yeah, this is uh. It says here your name is Zebra. Hell, yeah, brother, you said my name is Zebra. I'm thirty. I currently have an infection on my nose, and I think it is from eating too much pussy.

It might have been, I'm not entirely sure.

Okay, what makes you feel like it was from that?

Well, last week it happened a lot, and then after a left said pussy, a few days later I started getting a scab on my nose. And now a few days after that, plus started the form. So now I'm on antibiotics because my news is like partially corroding away.

Did you talk to a doctor?

Yes, I saw them yesterday.

Okay, what did the doctors?

They believe it's a staff infection, but I didn't bring up the pussy eating part with him.

What's it?

I wrote?

It sounds necessary?

How do you get a staph infection in your nose? I don't. That doesn't sound like it's related to eating pussy.

It's not in my nose. It's on my nose, like like the very tip of my nose. Somehow got some kind of a scar and then it got infected, so it turned into a giant scab on the front of my nose with puss around it.

Who are these women who that you've been doing that with?

Well, it was only one woman and I met her when I was on vacation down south.

Okay, what was what was the meat cute? How'd you meet? Si?

Was on tender?

Okay, do you remember what? What do you remember what you said to her? What do you mean on tender?

You?

You know Tender you match and you exchange messages and say words. What did you say?

Oh?

I mean, honestly, it was pretty pretty easy going, Like I spent in my profile that was only there for a week and just looking for people to hang with because I wanted some night life. And then the next day when we matched, she just basically just wanted like a FaceTime to see if I was actually a real person. And then the following day we linked up, but she was an hour late.

For the date.

So honestly, I thought I was gonna get set up by this woman, but she said she fell asleep and then it took her like an extra hour to get ready.

Okay, how was the date?

Pretty fun? Tried some drugs that I hadn't tried before, a lot of house music was going on around there, which I appreciate house. It can get repetitive sometimes, but I mean I still like house.

What was the drug.

To see?

Wait say this again?

To see?

Oh shit, dude, somebody just told me about to see? Yeah, it's like a.

It's like yeah, yeah, But from what she was explaining to me, it can be a cocktail of things. So what what does your person tell you is in it?

Uh?

I do? I forget what she said was in it, but all I know is that it's like a yeah, when you talked about I'd never heard of it before, and it's like I had neither. Yeah, it's like a pink powder that you snort.

What flavored with? Like it's flavored with like with fruit, Like I've had a strawberry one, a cherry one, and a passionate fruit flavored one so far. And apparently it's supposed to be like molly asses mixed together with maybe cocaine and also maybe ketamine. But I was trying to tell her, like, I'm not about the kenemine life, so keep that shit away from me. So she found like a different batch that she says didn't have kennymine in it.

Okay, and you snorted this, see what.

Yees?

Okay? And you think that your staph infection in your nose is from eating pussies, It could be it could be from.

The like I said, I'm not entirely sure. Well she didn't she her nose is fine apparently well, but maybe she has better better microbes inside of her fighting the infection. I don't know.

Would you do it again? How did it make you feel?

Honestly, bro?

Like, I didn't feel shit. I didn't know what the fuck was supposed to be doing. Like Luckily she got me some like molly presses as well, and I was just eating that, like I tried snoring it for like the first like a couple of days we were hanging, and I don't know what the fuck is supposed to do. Like some times that gave you a drip like coke does. It didn't make me like hyper like aware like coke. I don't do ketamine, so I don't really know what

Probably similar stuff I gotta ask, I mean before we go. I don't think I can help you in any way, but I just I'm curious. Who are you? What do you? What's your deal man? I'm cute, you have an interesting vibe. I just want to know a little bit about what your life is like.

Well, right now, I'm at work making teeth, but fake teeth. I discovered you Electric Forest last year because my music crew told me that we had to go check you out. So that's how I justvered you. I became the zebra at Electric Forest, So I've always just wanted to call in to have a gecko of zebra conversation with you.

Bro.

So you are a zebra who makes fake teeth like what the joker spins up and lets loose? Uh?

I guess so? Yeah? I mean my teeth going people's mouths.

I don't mind.

Don't walk around? Well, I guess something that they do walk around once they're in someone's mouth, don't they?

Uh do teeth walk around when they're in someone's mouth? I guess that would mean that, yeah, Because when you put the teeth in your mouth, the teeth become an extension of you. That's I guess that's like that's like saying, does your nose walk around?

Your nose can run?

Okay, maybe you and me should do some tussie and we'll figure out the answers to these questions. Zebra, Is there anything else you want to say out to the people of the computer before we go?

Oh, I would tell people to keep it in pussy. I mean, you just get some antibiotics and you all be good to take care of y'all.

Thanks for calling.

Peace out.

REYK goes on the line, taking his phone calls every night ever.

Be Can goes his just teaching you about life.

He's not ready an expert.