All from Rati tug Satte.
Hello, Hello, Hi, what's your name?
Well, you can call me Cam, because I mean, I'm sure my name is kind of hard to pronounce.
What's your name?
Ratieron tug Satte.
Say one more time?
Ratzer on tug sat.
Ratieran pag sat Yes. Why why did you shorten that to Cam?
Well, so it's it's it's a long story.
Uh.
So I grew up in a part of the Iroquois Confederacy and basically I'm Mohawk, uh native. Uh So we have names that are given to us by shaman, and then we have our birth certificate names, which is usually Americanized.
Oh okay, so your Americanized birth certificate name is Cam, and uh, your your real name is the other one?
Yes, exactly.
What are your friends call you?
Oh? They just called me Cam.
Does anyone call you by your real name?
No? Because I mean I moved out a little bit ago, just off the border of our reservation. Uh about nine years ago. I would say, mm hmm.
How old are you?
I'm about to turn nineteen?
Oh cool man. Uh. Where where was your reservation again?
It's in upstate New York. Uh, it's uh called AQUOSOSNY. I don't know if you've heard of it?
Mm hmm. Is it like a well known reservation?
Yeah, I would say that. How big is it spans from about I'm bad with my Canadian Uh what would you say? Like geography? I think like under Quebec and then it goes all the way to like downstate New.
York and you go up there your whole life.
Yeah, I mean.
I I spent some time in Italy. That's pretty much all of my heritage is Native and Italian, so I've been hopping through families pretty much all of my life.
What was it like growing up on the reservation.
Well, I mean I could definitely get into a lot of the dark history of stuff up here. Well, we have a lot of gangs up here that are run by you know MS thirteen. We have like a separate branch, so the way that a lot of things work up here anyway, I guess you can break down gang activity throughout.
I mean even just the United States is a total of you know, easiest, easiest borders to enter and a lot we get a lot of opium and cracked and mess and stuff like that up here, So you know, there's a lot of poverty and a lot of our just an upstate New York in general, our kind of local culture is propped up by drugs.
Mhm. And are you were you ever involved in any of that stuff growing up or stay away from it?
Well, it's it's a yes and no. I guess my parents met my my father was selling drugs to people, uh, you know all throughout uh you know the reservation him and another like addict were you know, using a uh charity organization too, I guess money through and that's where he met my mom, who was using at the time. And you know, there was a lot of uh drama there. But I mean on my my mom's side of the family, we have a lot of run ins with mafia, especially
in Drague. I don't know if you've heard of it. It's uh Sicilian mafia. My let's see my what third cousin, I would say, uh was pretty close with I'm trying to think of Tony Bennett.
I don't do you know that musician Tony Bennett.
No.
I think if the opening song of good Fellas, I think he Rags to riches he wrote that song, well, uh so hypothetically allegedly, how However, I may phrase it to uh not land any of us in any trouble. But they lived with each other in Watertown, New York for a while, and his fame was pretty much brought up on money being funneled through local mafia sect, I guess, you could say. And that's one of the many things
that brought you know, his rise to fame. And that's where that side of the family got, I guess connected with some of the mafia. And I do have some brothers and sisters back home, like in Italy anyway that that do still run. The only things that I have ever done I washed bitcoin through several cash app accounts. Somebody would make a purchase on some form of illegal goods and I would get the bitcoin, take ten percent of it, and then send it through multiple accounts to
get to the main account. But I stopped doing that, especially because recently have started to actually have a family, you know, uh my my girlfriend soon to be fiance, you know, has has been a major part of my life. And that's the reason I won't go to the military now is because I'm I'm I don't want to risk any of that anymore. And I mean I could very well, you know, go into you know, criminal organizations at any
moment in time, or do more than selling weed. I mean, of course, I mean everybody up here pushes at least announced a month, like but you know, that's really nothing in the grand scheme of things.
But I have to ask you before you continue any further. Are you about to get whacked for talking about all this on the Gecko Show?
I don't believe so. I mean, a lot of the people who I mentioned are dead, and a lot of the people are either arrested, and a lot of a lot of the people that I I do know who are you know, currently engaged in this sort of behavior, are usually across seas and whatnot. I did want to bring up one thing, but before I forgot I did call you at one point. Do you remember the name Peeballs Pretzel shop by any chance?
Yes, I do, I do remember that. Yeah, it was in front the whole time. The pretzel shop was just a front.
Yeah, no fucking I got that removed by the way. Just so then, like, if I ever were to call you again, you wouldn't you know, get a little bit worried, you know, for my safety.
Damn, dude, I don't remember what we talked about or whatever. I think I was probably yeah, pretty much, Yeah, I do remember that. But but that aside. Hmmm, well, okay, I have a bunch of questions. Okay, first of all, what do you mean isn't weeds legal in New York? Well, how are they pushing an ounce of weed?
Well, because everybody grows I mean legal, you know. It's you You can go to like any neighborhood, any you know, like little crack house on the side, and you'd be like, hey, can I go see your shed? And you'll probably see like at least ten plants. It's it's technically you're not supposed to have that many plants. But at this point, you know, so many people are growing that there's pretty much nothing anybody can do. Especially the cops around here
are fucking awful at their job. Like you know, uh, the amount of shit that people do on the daily. It's just impossible to regulate, especially because so much of our like I was saying before, our economy has propped up so much on a legal drug use. We ye some of the like In the town that I live in right now, we have three main restaurants that are all run by this one guy, and he was pushing coke to probably the entire North Country. It's it's it's been a not very hidden thing, especially.
I mean, your life is a movie, you know.
I probably have the most boring life out of any of all these crack heads up here.
Cam are you Okay?
Oh, I'm fucking wonderful. If it's a breathing thing, it's because I'm smoking a cigarette.
Okay, yeah, because you're breathing heavily. And I didn't know if you were having a heart attack or what was going on. But I want to know. I it's been cool hearing about the don't know a cool, but it's been it's been interesting hearing about the the lore of
your town and your family. But like, tell me about you, Like, so you were what what working washing bitcoin for some mafia folks, and now you're eighteen nineteen and you're you're moving out where you like You're You're not still on the reservation, right, No.
I'm like right on the outskirts. I mean it's right now. I'm most just focusing on, you know, working volunteering so I can become a chef. I'm planning on going to the culinary and stud of America sometime next year. Yeah, it's I'll be one of the one of the first people maybe other than like two people my family actually went to college and completed it because of you know, all the crazy shit that happened is up here.
And so you're gonna go for culinary and what what's your what's your ultimate goal? You want to be a chef?
Yeah?
Yeah. One of my plans I was making with my friend is that we were going to run a place from there's this big highway that goes from like pretty much the all of the East Coast, you know, through Baltimore to all the way up to New York. And we wanted to open up some lounges for electric cars where you could like, you know, sit down, eat, you know, maybe hang out, have a drink, you know, play some arcade games, whatever the fuck while you wait for your
car to charge. I've been recently writing a menu for it, you know, trademarking some ship. But that's that's pretty much my goal right now.
And you know, do you have to have an electric car to go to this restaurant?
Well no, but it certainly is definitely going to be built around that. I mean, I hope to have things be uh, you know, mostly environmentally friendly. You know stuff that I guess if you your average electric car user, you know, smug as a motherfucker thinks that they're great for the environment even though they perpetuate you know, child slavery and fucking uh mines in Africa sort of thing.
You know.
It's like all that organic food stuff. Like, hey, I'm into it, like like definitely, don't get me wrong in that, Like, I'm into it, but I think it will be a good uh and easy an easy market to corner.
Give me some menu items, are we is this like a chuck e cheese style chili fries, hamburger shit? Or are we going classes? Let's just throw me some menu items.
Well, right now, I'm working on breakfast items. I learned how to make a really amazing Hollandais sauce. I was one of the only people in my culinary class before to actually pretty much get it on the first try. I had some experience at one of the places up here I don't really remember the name right now, but they were voted by the New York Times of having
the best Hollandais sauce. But I wanted to play around with that sum for you know, morning options I wanted to Right now, I'm more in the stage of not necessarily the actual menu creation rather than ingredients that would work well in this sort of thing. I was thinking a lot of pescatarian stuff. I mean, I my some of my family right now, you know, deliver fish some of the best quality like thirty eight dollars per pounds to salmon, shit like that.
You know.
Uh So like I was thinking, you know, mostly uh, I guess what whatever would qualify as like hips or food. I haven't gotten to that market right now, but uh, right now I'm working at a co op with like a food co op. Uh, and I'll be getting some more experience in that sort of market because it is kind of uh meant for I guess environmentalists and vegans and vegetarians, et cetera.
Nice, nice, nice, This is cool. You got a little you gotta you got a real life going on. You gotta you got a wife too, Tell me about that.
Oh many guys.
Uh, this is gonna sound a little bit crazy, and I and I know it is. But no, I I've I've been seeing this girl for a while. She's she's been a you know, amazing part of my life. You know, we almost had had a child a few months ago, but she unfortunately miscarried.
I'm ah, that's that.
That was one of the things that I kind of took as a sign of, you know, maybe maybe it's time to wait, no matter how you know depressing it is, but wait.
Just real quick as you you breaface this by saying you were going to say something crazy.
Yeah, we have been together for less than a year, but you know, it's it's it's I I've connected very well with her and all of her family, and it's been the first time I really believe that I've you know, been a part of a family. I mean I've I've been pretty much traded and needs as a token piece for all of my life. And it's and it's nice to be able to, I guess, settle down and have a feeling of actual family rather than you know, being the oh yeah, you're too uh immature or fucking uh
psychologically mangled in order to to have this child. So I get passed between parts of the reservation, in parts of Italy, parts of Malta, you know, farther up to the United States. You know, I live with my grandmother right now, So you know, it's it's at least unstable, but I'm kind of it gets it gets lonely. I mean, most of the time I'm here by myself, but I do plan on moving in with her pretty soon.
Okay, hmm hmm. I mean, look, man, I don't think that's that crazy. I think you've definitely been through a lot of stuff, and this is definitely providing you with a lot of the things that you felt as though you didn't have when you were growing up, or that you are you know, I mean that you just didn't
have in your life at all. But it's funny to me because despite everything that happened to you, you know, or maybe not even just maybe you know, would in spite be the same as despite I'm gonna say it is. I'm gonna say it's not crazy. I was just gonna say it's interesting because even though all that stuff happened, you, you know, you're a very you know, just at least from talking to you, you're a very mature guy, and
you've got a lot of plans for your life. And you you know, despite all of the universe's attempts to fuck you up, you've stayed. It seems, at least to me, pretty resilient. So I admire that.
I mean, yeah, that's that's This is where I guess the downside's coming is. This is one of the things that I wanted to talk about, is that you know, I feel like, despite I do believe I am a creative person, and I mean, I don't like to talk myself up. It feels a little bit wrong, but you know, it's it's been one of those things where you know, there's so many different things that I want to do, but I feel like I don't have the mental tools to be able to do a lot of the things
that I want to do. And it's it's just been difficult because I mean, I love music, and I love art, and I love cooking. It just feels like, you know, whenever I try to do any of these things, it fails. But I and I have this issue where whenever I think I'm being smart about something, it's I have this dilemma. It's uh like I am either being stupid, which is causing me to feel like I'm being smart about it, or I'm you know, being smart about it, but I'm
too I guess, uh too stupid. To realize that I'm that I'm being smart and I I've run to that issue a lot, so it ends up in me giving up on a lot of things that I do.
Damn, I'm gonna be honest. I I you've lost me on this, but I would love to hear an example and maybe I'll understand.
Well, like, uh, I, I I have a lot of you know, I talk my ass off. If you can't be if you can't tell already, you know, especially after I started doing you know, mushrooms and ship, you know, I I feel like my my voice has been more important to me than ever. And it's like I'll tell somebody an idea I have and the first thing I think is like, wow, this is such a smart idea, and then I go, no, I'm not being smart. This
is probably something everybody else thought. I'm just being stupid and that's what's making.
Well, let me tell you, well, I'll tell you this much about what you just said just now is the and we're you know, look, I'm about to get all Tony Robbins on you and shit, But I mean, yeah, everyone's had every smart idea, but it's about what you do, right, So look, I don't know. I don't know how active your plans are for this Tesla cafe. But it's about what you do. And when you're young, I feel like, I mean, don't go into a crazy amount of debt
or you know, do something like fucking stupid. But when you're fucking nineteen, you can just you can just try stuff. You know, you can just go for it, especially right now, you know, when when you don't have a child. If you don't have a child and you don't have I mean, because that's a huge responsibility, and you know, nobody else is really like, uh, you know, depending on you to eat and live. You can kinda just take the time to screw around and see what happens. I mean, that's
what's great about that time in life. And it's cool that you have all these different ideas because you can just say fucking and give one a try.
I just I definitely I worry about becoming my father, and I will explain that it's like he does this thing where he goes on these high rades about like, oh yeah, I should pitch this idea to fucking Elon Musk about you know, mining hydrogen on fucking whatever planet. And I'm like and then he sketches out this whole fucking thing, you know, does all this crazy shit for absolutely no reason, and then just sits on his ass, you know, and like he's not a bad dude.
But he.
Is a parasitic type. I will say, you know.
He are you saying he's he's all talk.
Yeah, that's one.
Of the things that that kind of it makes me mad, to be honest. Like it it's like he talks himself up and talks up all of his ideas, but you know, he he never tries, and he puts down everybody in his way, like you know, he thinks that he's much smarter than everybody else. And and it's and it's it's sad to watch him, you know, burn through friendships and relationships. I mean, I don't live with him, you know, we don't have the greatest of relationships. I mean I've I've
beat the fuck out of him multiple times. You know, he's he but all all definitely deserves But you know, it's it's just if that gives you any insight into the kind of person I guess maybe that I am, or that he.
Is, well camp, I mean, you have a self awareness about this stuff. You have a model that you do not wish to follow, and so I think that's gonna be a helpful thing for you. I don't know what your dad's dad was like or if you thought the same thing about him, but mhmm, you know, yeah, man, I just feel like if you have don't don't don't have so many ideas that you don't end up actually
doing anything. You know. I think that. But you're a you've been through a lot, You're you're seemed to be an enterprising young guy, and so I would take whatever energy you have right now and instead of uh, you know, shutting your eyes and thinking as many fucking thoughts as you can possibly think and as many ideas about everything as you possibly can, just go and try some stuff.
Yeah, I I I it's it's it's definitely difficult, especially not having a uh, you know, a mode of transport or any capital.
Like the jobs that I do work are strictly volunteer work.
Uh Okay, So then why don't you want do you? Why don't you focus on whatever idea because look, I'm sure you have a billion ideas of things that you want to do. You talk about music, You talked about what whatnot. You're probably a little bit you Yeah, you know, opening up a restaurant requires more capital than than you currently have, which is fine. But I'm sure you have plenty of ideas that don't require any capital or any or or you know, don't require you to leave your
fucking computer. So why don't you start with those?
Yeah, I I I think that it would be in my best interest. It's just you know, uh, I'm one of the people who who gets demotivated when I, uh don't do something correct or feel like I'm struggling learning something, and that's that's one of the things.
But you just you're not You're not like a Zen mastered got You're like nineteen. Just just fuck around. Just just fu I swear to God, just like you can get so wrapped up in your own head about perfection and whatnot, but this fuck around, dude, don't don't attach you're attaching so much direness to it. It's not a dire thing. Just just just play. Okay, this is this should be play at this point.
That you know. That's that's that's definitely uh, that's definitely right, you know. I I I tend to I guess worry about these things a little bit too much when uh, the only thing I can really do is don't have action, uh you know, and less.
Like I was gonna say at this at this point, anything that you're doing that's not dealing drugs seems to be a pretty good good ah hobby or or endeavor for you to be doing.
Is such it's it's like I will never recommend it, but I will say it is the easiest, fastest, and like least uh the you have to put the least amount of work in and and it's it's I think it's helped me. Like you know, I was gonna, uh, somebody owes me some money and the next time they pay me, I'm gonna be getting one of those Google certificates. I don't know if you've heard of those. They're like fifty bucks per month and you get to learn like.
You can get you can get Google certified to be a crack dealer.
No, no, no, you can get get like Google certified to like do like cybersecurity and like uh you know, business management and ship and you know they're like I I will never you know, if my my morals are I'm never going to sell any anything to anybody if I know that they're abusing it, or if it's like that's why I don't sell like cracker heroin. It's just like lead shrooms. If I have an access, then I
feel like it's gonna go mouldy or something. You know, It's it's more just a it's definitely no Uh, I'm no scar face for sure.
Okay, Well, I like to do good with those motifcs. Well, I don't know. I guess somebody's gotta deal shrooms. But what the fuck am I saying? Cam? You look, here's the thing I'm gonna and I'm gonna leave you with this. You have a billion ideas that you want to do. Go to one of them that's not selling pot or drugs or I mean, I mean sell pot. You can sell pot legally now soon to be able to probably
just sell shrooms legally. So whatever, Maybe you will, maybe you'll have, maybe you'll have maybe eventually the law will catch up to that big brain of yours and you'll start the first shroom delivery, uh or whatever the fuck it is. But love, Cam, it's been nice talking to you, man, and thanks for sharing all this stuff, and I hope that things go well for you and uh, if I ever come to up to this uh Tesla place, I would like for you to give me a free grilled cheese sandwich dude.
On the house. Everything anything you want. Man, you got it. Man, I do have if I'm not intruding at all, I do have one last piece of advice to like ask for you know, if it's if it's not you know, anything that would would bother you, what is it? Well, so recently I've been talking to my ex, not in
any like weird way or anything like that. It's, you know, strictly a friendship thing because we used to we dated about six years ago, and uh, you know, she's she was a really close friend of mine, and I I don't like, do you think that's a bad idea? Like, it's not where we wouldn't get into into anything. You know, she's you know, been an amazing friend.
And your fiance I know about it.
Yeah, I told her about it, but and she wasn't like yippy, But she also wasn't like her. That's fucking that's awful. Why would you do that? It was kind of a neutral thing. So yeah, that's been bearing in my mind.
Feel terrible with this kind of stuff. Man, I got no idea. I mean, this is is just your friends, right.
Yeah, it's like I I I feel bad to a certain extent because, like I mean, it is somebody I used to date. But I am a very loyal person, so I know that I'm not going to do anything. And if she were to try to do anything, I know I would shut it down immediately.
But I I would. Uh, I don't know. I don't want to tell you what to fuck it do, but mm hmm. But yeah, because I don't know what the fuck do I know? I don't know, man, Just focus on building your dude, you have way, do you have better things to worry about than this? Okay, I guess yeah.
You're right, You're right. I appreciate it though.
Thank you very much, thank you for calling Cam, and good luck to you, and I will be back at some point to redeem that free girl cheese sandwich of course.
Man, have a good one later.
Man, I don't fucking know. I don't know the answers to when he said I like talking to him. I like talking to him about his history and his life and getting into who he is. But when he's like, can I have advice on if I should talk to any anytime someone's like, can I have advice on if I should talk to this girl or not? I'm like, I got I don't fucking know. I don't know at all. I don't know anything about life. The if you're asking that question, the answer is usually like the answer the
answer to that question. The answer to that question ninety seven percent of the time is probably not. But around ninety seven percent of the time you do it anyway because his brains emotions they're strong. Hello, Hello, Hi, who is this?
This is Natalie?
Well? What's oh god? All right? You have a dog? Can you? Can you throw your dog out out out in the garbage? Wabby talk?
Yeah yeah, let me, yeah, give me one second, I'll put her in the garage.
Cool. That's better. That's about That's a much better idea than what I said.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure, for sure?
Are you still there?
Yeah?
I'd there. She should be good.
Now, what's your name again?
Natalie?
Natalie? What's what's going on? How can I get you today?
So?
Funny story? Do you want the whole story or the short version?
Let's start with the short version.
My roommate matched with this guy on Tinder somehow, I started talking to him. Fast forward two months and now he's driving all the way from New York to Iola and is visiting me here. And I've never met him in person.
And so he started out as I'm he matched with your friend and then used to how did you start talking to him after he matched with your friends? Uh?
We I definitely catfished him for like an hour, and he thought I was my roommate and then it turned out to be me, and I don't know somehow he kept talking to me.
What is what does that look like? Logistically? You can't fished him as your roommate. Your roommate? Is your friends that match with him?
Yeah?
Yes, yes, she's my best friend. She's my best friend.
What does that look like? You like stole her phone or something?
Yeah, I was using her phone on her tender account and she was sitting next to me the whole time.
Oh so it was like, haha, well, actually, here's the number of the person you've been talking to.
Yes, that's what happened.
Did your friend like this guy? Did this? Did that upset her?
No?
She was Actually she's actually really happy for me. But it's kind of funny now listening to the story because he never actually talked to her. He just saw her pictures and matched with him.
He knows, he knows that it's he's talking to you, right.
Yes, he does know that he's talking to me. We face times and all of that stuff since then, so he knows who I am.
Now, why is your friend matching with dudes in New York if she lives in Iowa? Is she doing like the passport thing?
Uh?
No, he's actually in the military. So he was visiting his family in Iowa and then went back to New York like the day after we started talking.
And how long have you been talking to this guy?
Like two months now? We just hit like sixty day streak on snapchat, Aisle.
How are you feeling about him coming to visit you.
I'm a little nervous. I'm not gonna lie because in reality, he literally could murder me, Like I don't know this man really besides over the phone.
You know that is true. That is the risk that you run every time a stranger comes to your house.
Yes, and he's staying at my house, like he's staying here. He's not staying at a hotel, he's not staying with his parents. He's like staying here?
How long is he supposed to stay there for?
Just over the weekends? Like three nights? Not too bad?
Okay, is your roommate gonna be there?
I think she's gonna be here a little bit of the time, but she might just stay with her parents at least one of the nights.
You know. What's so funny is do you remember how old are you?
I'm twenty two.
Okay. When I think, do you remember taking like webs safety classes in school?
I do remember that.
Do you remember when they told us they were like they said things like never give your real name out on the internet. That's what they started with.
They really did. But here I am giving my entire address this man.
Right, they And it's funny, how like because this was in like elementary school. So I was in elementary school what I don't like two thousand and eight or something like that, and the Internet has changed to the point where everyone is giving out just their full address and social security number. Like giving your real name out on the internet is like nothing.
Yeah, sure, are you suggesting I give my social Security number to this man?
Is he offering you some kind of investment opportunity?
You know, I'm not one hundred percent sure. I guess I'll find out tomorrow when he gets here.
Okay, are you meeting him in like where is it? Where are you gonna meet him? Like at your house?
Yeah? Like, he won't get here till like eleven pm twelve am tomorrow night, So it's gonna be in the dark in front of my house. Literally could be a horror movie plot.
I mean, would it make you feel better to like meet him in a not dark, late night place.
I don't know, you know, I haven't really thought about it. I was just kind of like why not. You know, there's the first time for everything, and hopefully it goes good and not bad. Very optimistic.
Is has throughout the twelve different throughout the two months that you've been talking to him every day, has there been any inkling, indication intuition that he might try to kill you?
No? No, he seems nice. He seems like a good guy, a good stable guy. He gets out of the military in May, so we'll see what happens after that.
Okay, have you have you ever done anything like this before?
No? No, I haven't. I was in a four year long relationship that I've got out of like six six six six months ago, and this is like the first guy I'm talking to again that I'm like serious about and kind of like, so hopefully I still like him when I meet him in person.
Well, you know, I don't wanna. I don't want to undercut your intuition because you uh, you know, have the agency that you know, do whatever the hell you want. So I guess, So, I guess all I can do is hope that he doesn't kill you. I don't think this guy is going to kill you. I don't know. I'm I'm, I'm a I am myself. I'm a fairly trusting person. I think, I'm i'm. I try to assume
the best in people. I think. I'll say this, I think mathematically, mathematically, the amount of people in the world that want to kill you is so significantly smaller than the amount of people who don't want to kill you.
For sure. Have you ever done anything like this while.
Like meta stranger from the Internet, Well, I.
Mean sure, but like randomly at a dark place after talking to them for a couple of months, and.
Probably I'm I'm sure I used to tinder a lot. I'm sure I did something like that in the in the Tindering days.
Oh, for sure, So you're alive. So hopefully I'm also still alive by Friday morning.
Yeah, I hope.
So.
I mean look, I mean, look, if you're feeling that unsure about it, you could always be like, hey, why don't you get a hotel and then we can meet tomorrow.
Yeah, we'll see, we'll see, We'll see how I'm feeling tomorrow. I think I'm just anxious about it right now.
You know, Okay, are you anxious, like just like from a social standpoint, are you like just first date sort of anxiety?
I think so, Yeah, but it's just like a lot of build up since it's like two months of first date anxiety.
Yeah.
Sure, I just met him three days ago and we're going on our first date. It's like, no, two months.
Well, I mean, look, don't do anything that you know it makes you you you have a bad feeling about. But I'm gonna I'm gonna manifest. I used to. I used to make fun of manifesting, and I still don't. I still think it's a little stupid, but I kind of I'm kind of coming around to it. I'm gonna manifest that this guy doesn't kill you and that you have a fun and a wonderful time with him throughout the visit.
I appreciate that manifesting all the positive vibes for me and my roommate who has to deal with this random guy in her house for the next few days.
Maybe I have your roommates stay home for a little bit, just in case. It's not a horrible idea.
Okay, but she is. She's she's gonna be my wing woman, so she'll be there to support me at least the first night, and then she can.
You know what you should do? Actually is you should you know what you should do? You should have her answer the door and be like it act Shelly was me the whole time.
That would be hilarious. Maybe I will do that, say that she was telling me what to say?
Oh, she was telling you what to say?
Yeah, because if any time, he obviously saw my face. Yea, So maybe she was just texting me the whole time.
What's your name again, Natalie? Natalie? Is there anything else you want to say to the people of the computer before we go?
No, you're the best. I appreciate you.
Thanks, Natalie. I hope that you don't die, unless if it's like of old age, which wouldn't wouldn't be for a long time.
I don't think no, for sure. I hope you don't die either.
Lyle.
Thanks man, see you later.
Okay, bye, it's a while.
Uh, dude, I wanted to call you because so U. Last week we got a phone call from this girl who was talking about how this dude that she met on the internet and has never met in real life and she's been talking to him for about two months is going to drive fifteen hours to spend the weekend at her house, and she was afraid that this guy was going to kill her, but also was looking forward to the potential of, of course that not happening, and of this being a fun weekend of bonding and merriment.
And then I got a text from you saying that you are the guy and you wanted to let me know how the weekend went.
Yeah, the weekend was great.
And this is a and I want to point out this is from a different phone, which means that you did not kill her, steal her front, steal her phone and text me from that.
Yeah.
No, she's totally alive.
She's alive, and well great, she's her roommate's watching this.
Cool.
The weekend went great.
I actually got an extended stay because I had car issues and I couldn't get back to New York, so actually instead of leaving on Monday, by some Wednesday.
Okay, so I mean, tell me how the weekend went.
It was good.
The first few days were a little shaky, just getting to know her. When I showed up at one am, it was super awkward. Her and he roommate were just sitting in the living room, like like parents when you come home late at night. But like she hugged me, I wasn't. I wasn't expecting. I thought we were going to like maybe I was gonna sleep on the couch or something. But all seemed to go well right off the bat. And then I got a shower, and then we slept, and then Friday and Saturday were really busy.
I met her parents. She met my parents. I don't know why, but we did, and that went well.
Wait, so she met your parents. Do your parents live in this place that you went to? I don't don't. Do they not live where you live?
No?
I live up here because, as she said, I'm in the I'm in the Army, but you know I'm from I'm from Iowa.
I'm from near where she lives now.
Hmm, okay, So you two met each other's parents, and then did you explain to her parents the circumstances of you guys meeting and how you've only known each other for like a day.
Her parents knew everything about me before I even saw them. She was she was given them all the info in case, I guess, in case if I killed her or something, which I didn't.
And how was your interaction with her parents?
Do her parents are so cool?
I get along with her dad so well, and.
Her mom's really funny, and and they were.
They were really cool about the whole thing.
Her mom was asking for updates like the whole time I was there, mmmm, which was funny.
How how deep into the weekend did you talk to her mom?
I saw them on on oh, I want to say this Saturday morning. Saturday morning, and then I met her parents for breakfast with her grandma, and then we went to her other grandparents' house and I met her aunt and her other grandparents and we all hung out as like a group.
I met her brother. But that's that's all of the interaction I had with them.
Did anyone from the family seem to be wary of you.
I don't. I don't think so. They were all pretty welcoming.
I think it's just because I don't know they She gave them good good word on me before I met them.
Mhm. Okay. Now, I remember from my conversation with her that you initially had matched with her her roommate on the dating app, and you were talking to her roommate, and then she started texting you from her roommate's tender. Is that right?
Yes?
Okay, And now when you were there was any part of you like like you were you glad that it was horror and not the roommate.
Not not in a negative way towards her roommate, but yeah, I was her. Her roommate's not just not not my style. She definitely has way more of my style, which was nice.
It's a very you know what, that's a very that's a very diplomatic answer to what I'm just realizing was a trick question that I gave you.
Yeah, I don't want to sound like a dick on the phone. You know, her roommate's watching.
Now where are you now? Are you back on on base?
Yeah? Yeah, I'm an I'm back back in New York?
Okay, Are you going to go back to Iowa anytime soon?
We've talked about me visiting for Thanksgiving, and I'm definitely visiting for Christmas. It's just, you know, financially and with my car problems, I don't know, it can be tough to visit as often as I want to.
Mm hmm. I mean, like in the future, are you planning to go back to Iowa? Are you going to stay in New York?
Oh? No?
What So I get out of the Army in May, and I'm I'm definitely moving back to Iowa for at least a little bit. I'm probably going to live in the same area that she lives in now. And I've even talked to her because my parents said I could bring a friend with. We're going on a trip to Germany in May, and I talked to her maybe I'd take her with because she likes to travel.
That's all. Do you wait? Can you call her? Can we three way? You guys in I feel like I talked to her, I haven't. I feel like I talked to her beforehand, I talked to you after and now I want to talk to both of you guys at once.
I don't.
I don't know how to how to add someone into the call.
If you could help me, see, oh here we go. H yeah, well she had this goes all right?
Sweet, it's a three way call all time. Natalie, He's here, Natalie, Hey, Natalie, what's up?
Nothing much?
How are you?
I'm doing good. It's good to speak with you again. This is cool. I don't usually do follow ups, but after that last call, I remember there being a lot of people in the chat being like, you should call her to make sure she wasn't killed by that guy, And it appears you were not.
No, I am thankful to report that he did not show up here and kill me.
And you had your room. You were like debating whether or not your roommate was going to stay there with you too.
Yeah, my roommate did end up staying the whole time, So that was nice as a nice little backup just in case anything did happen.
So what's what was your review of the weekend?
I would say the weekend went well. We got along really well, and we had conversations every day. I don't really think we got tired of each other that easily. And yeah, it was good.
We're still talking nice nice. I guess is there anything in particular that you you were talking about on our last call that you want to update anyone about, or or any details that you want to share with the people about the the ending to this.
I don't know.
I think it really was kind of funny because the first day we actually hung out is when his car broke down, and it could have gone terribly and he could have we were out of pumpkin patch and he could have gotten really mad and like just yelled and then a terrible human being and acted really negatively towards it. He ended up laughing, which I think was a good, like silly way to start the weekend, and then obviously
end it with a joke. And so it did go really well and I didn't die, and I'm very thankful for that, and so everybody in the chat should be happy that I'm safe and sound and still in Iowa, alive.
And breathe it.
Would you recommend to other people that they invite strangers from the internet to their house at the middle of the night so that they can have similar beautiful experiences as you, I.
Would say if you have facetimed them beforehand and know stuff about them, then sure, why not? But if it's someone you've only texted for like a day, maybe.
Not so much. What's the guy's name again, Lucas, Lucas, Lucas? Is there anything else you want to say to the people of the computer before we go?
Don't show up at random people's houses because I don't know, it's scary.
What did your parents think about all this stuff?
My parents were just like you.
As long as you don't end up ballgags in her basement, it's okay.
And even if that does happen, just try to wait it out.
They're very supportive.
See that's true. You could have killed him too, you know what, I could have.
He said that he purposely.
He said that he.
Purposely took duct tape out of his bag so that we didn't think he was some sort of serial killer.
Why do you keep duct tape in your bag?
I keep duct tape in super glue on me all the time.
Have you read to use it?
Well, yeah, you're super glue. I don't know. I like to I like quick, easy way to fix things. I would have used it on my.
Car if it wasn't metal.
Well, you guys, stay on your shoes around each other. Yeah, all right, take care guys, Thank you very much, talk to you later. That was nice. I don't know, I
don't I remember. I think on the last call when I was talking to Natalie about all of this stuff, it was it was a little strange, right, But I was a little agnostic about it, right, because it's like, well and on you know, meeting a stranger from the internet, high risk, medium to high reward, right because well, you the risk is that the person kills you, but the like,
that's the worst possible that could happen. But the best thing that could happen is that you get married and have children and live forever and ever happily and the best thing that's ever happened to you in your life. And blah blah blah blah blah. So I don't know. I guess it's high risk, high reward, but you know, don't don't bring duct tape if you're gonna do that.
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