Hello, Hello, is this Lyle?
Who is this?
This is Tristan.
Tristan.
How are you doing?
Tristan? Yes, take me off a speakerphone.
You are not on speakerphone.
But I was on a headset.
Different spot mine headset not at all. Her phone is to the head phones.
To the head yep. Okay now and then your phone explodes and it kills you like it's seen from a grand theft out of five. Yeah. Anyway, Well, Tristan, what's going on? How's life?
It's it's been interesting? How about yourself?
Who cares about me? Why has your life been interesting?
Okay, So what I texted you was about my ex fiance's secret life. I met her like September twenty twenty two, and apparently she met another dude around the same time, and she was going back and forth between him and I, and she got pregnant like within a month of you know,
me meeting her. So I thought, not knowing this other guy, that that kid was mine, right, So supported her through all of the pregnancy through you know, all of seven months until I found out that kid wasn't mine through a fraternity thus, and after that I was kind of like doing some digging around trying to find some answers because nothing was really adding up. One over two is her grandmother's house. And they told me about this other guy.
How she would tell them that, you know, he's the father, but I know him. I couldn't have kids if I wanted to raise her kid as my own. It's a yeah, it's a fun story.
So you knew this woman for a month and then she got.
Pregnant, Yeah, a little bit over a month.
I had to meet her through tender.
Through tender, and you thought the kid was yours? And when did you find out it wasn't.
I found out February fifteenth of this year.
How long was that after you had met?
So I met her in twenty twenty two, so just about two years. The baby was seven months old, and I didn't have a job at the time that I met her, So I went around looking for a job. I'm like, Okay, if I'm going to have this kid, I'm going to have to, you know, be be able to support both of them. And so I got a job at Taco Bell worked my way up. Within eight months, I was the regional manager. I took over that store that I, you know, started working at, and then got
a job with the county. So I'm working for the county now, and some things weren't adding up. Some things just made me question. So behind her back, I did one of those like DNA swabs and sent it in. I got the results fifteenth of February, and I didn't know what to do about it. So I kind of got the results. I looked at him, went back and you know, I was just looking at the baby, then looking at her. She knew something was off, so she ended up going through my phone while I was sleeping
and saw the DNA test. And when I woke up, she was gone. She took the ring and stole my forerunner.
Damn. So you raised this kid. So you meet a woman on tender, you have this crazy accident pregnancy, you step the fuck up, You go, I'm gonna raise this kid. You have the kid, the kid's seven months old. You find out it's not yours. Am I recapping this correctly.
Yeah, in the same night she was gone.
I woke up.
Was the kid leave the kid? Did you take the kid?
Oh?
She took the kid?
Fucking damn? So what ah man? And this was this was too.
Yeah. Yeah, seeing the results, I felt like, you know, I lost child, Like I didn't know how to kind of react, and I didn't want to just blow up on her, so I kind of just wanted to sit with that information for a minute before I did anything about it. And she knew something was wrong, so she went through my phone and you know, changed the pass code on my phone, so I had to like factory reset it, and I lost all my photos and you
know a bunch of important things that I need. But you know, that's kind of a small inconvenience compared to everything else. But on top of already feeling like I just lost a child, they were gone and there were no answers, there were no you know, nothing added up. So you know, I did some detective detective work. I found out who the actual father was, and he and I right now seemed to be doing okay, like we're friends, we're talking about it. We kind of have a very
similar experience with this woman. And right now I'm just trying to get my name off the baby's birth certificate, so like I'm not you know, having to pay child's port or whatever for a child that's not mine and kind of just move on with my life.
So you and this kid's father became friends.
Oh yeah, I talked to him last night actually about what uh well, we talked about different like experiences that we had with her, like how we met everything like that. My attorney is actually trying to attach him on the like whole court situation so he can sign like, Okay, if I get a paternity test and I'm the actual father, then I'll step up and be that baby's father, you know.
So we're just trying to figure out how to go about doing all all this and potentially get him full custody of the child because she's very clearly not someone that should be raising a child right now.
So what's his deal with her? Like how did this even?
Like?
Uh how, what's what's his story with her?
It's like eerily similar. We met her around the same time September. I don't know if I met her first or how that went. Who met her first, but you know, met on tender, talked it up. Things are going well, and she got pregnant, like very very soon into both of us talking to her, and you know, he did the same thing I did, stepped up, was like, shit, I don't have a job right now. I need to figure out Okay, what am I gonna do? What's the
best way to raise this child? So he got a job, he you know, worked his ass off, supported her as I supported her. So she later I found out and found like different jewelry and stuff like that. It's, yeah, very similar to what I went through.
So was he. So he was still having a relationship with her throughout the whole time that you were.
Oh yeah, yeah. So her family is about like forty minutes an hour away, and she would want to go and visit them. So I let her borrow my truck drive down to visit her family while I went to work, and sure enough she was going to see him. Like June of last year, she convinced me to let her take my truck to Santa Cruz to do like this
camping trip with her friend, like this guy. But I always thought that they were just close friends, you know, And apparently the tent that I bought her to use because she was pregnant, they you know, did their business in the tent, and you know, they were still a thing all the way up until October of last year
while her and I were together. So she just would go back and forth and you know, tell this part of her family like, oh, he's the father, and then the other part of the family like he's not the father, but he doesn't want to talk about it, just you know, don't bring it up. He knows he's not the father, but he wants to raise the child like it's his because he can't have kids, which I can.
He's just manipulous, And so was she when the baby was born.
How'd that work? Like was this other guy like in like, how the fuck? How the fuck did she keep this charade going once the baby was born.
So when the baby was born, I was with her and I stayed up holding her hand and helping her get the epidural, stayed up all the way like through like four in the morning. Her water broke four forty the baby was already out, like it was a very fast, like crazy birth. And after things calmed down, I fell asleep. And after I fall asleep, she actually called the actual father was like, hey, I'm sorry the I didn't have time to warn you and let you know about coming
to the hospital, but your daughter's here. And I was literally five feet from her just to sleep.
Wow.
And she watched me sign the voluntary declaration of parenthood that the fathers do.
Wow.
And in the state of California, it's incredibly difficult to nullify that signature because they don't want those children to become wards of the state. So like, even if you're not the actual father and later on it, you know, you find out if you sign that, it's incredibly difficult to you know, take it to court and get it to be taken off unless you actually know the father and he's willing to step up. That's why I, you know, became friends with the actual father because he seems like
a chill dude. And you know, we just got played by a woman.
I mean, that's that's such a I can't even begin to understand how she was able to keep this charade up while being right, because like even like you know, trying to have like two boyfriends at once is it sounds like a complicated fucking thing. But to do it while you're pregnant and both of them think they're the father, I mean, that's how that fuck to even do.
That, which unfortunately I don't even know if it was only the two of us, right, you know, there's possible there was more. And I was working twelve hour plus shifts that I was working my ass off the moment I would get home. Like I, I was tired. I got to a point where I couldn't keep fighting and pushing for answers because she would throw in just enough truth and make it provable, but still be a lie. So she was very good. She's a callin artist like her.
Her family is just the same. Like her little sister ended up moving in with us because her grandmother kicked her out, which later I found out they planned it. They you know, lied to the grandmother and she got custody of her little sister. But I've looked into that girl's eyes, and I honestly saw all evil. I I just fought and fought to keep pushing, and she would threaten to leave and like go to her mom's in Modesto, and I didn't want to not be a part of
my child's life, so I just kind of caved. And you know, at a certain point, I was too tired to keep fighting and I was just getting walked over.
So do we know where she is and where that kid is?
Yes? Yeah, I actually went down. My attorney told me, if you know where the Forerunner is, just go and get it. And I drove down there after work one day, hopped into it, throve started driving. They ran out of the apartment and like climbed on top of it. She was current, like in the middle of this, bashing the window, trying to break it with the keys, and they wouldn't get off the car. So the cops were called. They came.
I showed them like, hey, my attorney told me to get my car back, and so the cops called Triple A for me and helped me tell it back home. And yeah, I've been through quite a lot of craziness.
And okay, so you got to get your car from this woman. And then your buddy, your new friend, he's gonna get his kid. What's up with that?
Yeah? Our court day is September, and you know part of that is, okay, we need a court mandated paternity test, so that'll be done for both of us for the baby. That'll prove that I'm not the father, and you know, find out if he truly is the father.
Right, does he even know? That's not like a third guy?
We don't know.
Oh my god, how old are you man?
Yeah, I'm twenty five.
Twenty five, jeez, And this has been you're doing and this is this whole newsy's been going on for two years almost something like.
That from since I've known her, but you know the crazy extra crazy stuff I guess has been since February.
Hmmm. So okay, I gotta ask you this, Like you and this guy like it is here boy, now, you guys ever like hang out and just like get high and play Fortnite, Like what's up?
We've been trying to set up a time to meet up. He's he's a bit far away because he was kind of in that side of her life. But we're trying to said something up, hopefully next week to finally meet in person. But like when I got the Forerunner and they were loading it up on the on like tow truck, I called him and I was telling him what happened, and he's like, yeah, fuck her, dude, Yeah, like all this stuff. So you know, he's on my side.
Man, that'd be cool if you guys became like good boys, you know, playing a trip to Vegas together hung out.
I can honestly highly see that, Like he's chill, genuine dude.
So m hmm, So what's next for you?
Man?
How the fuck? Uh uh? What do you have any do you have anything positive and good planned for your life.
I'm signing a trip to the Philippines next year. I have a nice job. Now I'm happy you can send kind of work, more experience, and then move on to a better paying job. But you know where I'm at right now, I'm pretty good. Like it was, it was a weight lifted off my shoulder, Like I I wasn't ready to have a kid, and I especially wasn't ready to be with this person. But you know, I proposed because I thought that kid was mine and just trying to do everything right. But now I can focus on myself.
That's wonderful. Man, that's really great. I mean, I'm sorry that uh it's that's such a wit. That's got to be such a weird, crazy feeling. Yeah, it really must be like losing a child, but in this weird way where you know, like you like you were saying like you weren't even really ready and but you know, you stepped up and then you find out the kid's not yours, and it's really painful, but it's also a weird relief, you know, because now you get to go to Philippines,
you get to live your own life. It sounds like you've recovered well from this this crazy thing.
I mean, it's still mentally fucks with me, but you know, it's kind of I'm doing what I can about it and everything else that I can't do anything about it. I just kind of have to let go, like it doesn't affect anyone else but myself to have, you know, hatred in my heart for that or anything else. So just kind of accepted and move on, try to make the best of it.
What's your name again, I'm Tristan.
You're good fucking dude, Tristan.
I appreciate that.
Really a lot of characters. Yeah, it has been a real quest. I mean, this is a crazy, crazy thing. I mean, if this happened to me, it would drive me completely insane. And you, I mean, I'm sure it did drive you completely insane, and maybe it took a little while, but you seem like you get a a decent head on your shoulders still after everything.
I mean, there's so much more like on top of it, but I tried to just kind of lay out a base foundation of that shit show. But yeah, that's honestly, like I thought about drinking and I kind of did a little bit afterward, went like drink for like a week and was like, this isn't helping, this isn't doing anything. I don't smoke weed, I don't, you know, do drugs. I work for the county, Like I can't do any of that stuff, So I basically only have alcohol and
I just don't get anything out of that. I've always been in the dirt by and kind of through the relationship. I was taking care of her. She was on bed rest, and you know, I kind of lost all my hobbies. It was taken care of two children, and then when her sister came three, so I kind of would work. I would get home, make dinner, clean the house. They wouldn't do anything. They would just be on their phones and you know, doing whatever while I took the baby.
After I got home, made dinner for everyone. I was kind of just doing it all. So I didn't have time for any hobbies. But like, I learned how to ride a dirt bike when I was two years old, so A bought a YZ four P fifty and just going out to Prairie City doing my thing.
Would you ever have a kid of your own with a sane person?
I was, oh, God, with the same person.
No, No, no, oh, I said, with a sane person.
Oh, with the sane person. M. I've genuinely looked into like respectomies and honestly, if I never had a kid, I'm okay with that, Like it was rewarding to you know, see the progression, change those diapers and you know, really be there for that child. But you know that kind of thing where people talk about like the moment I saw my child, just the amount of love in my heart changed, Like I didn't know what love was before
I met my child. That didn't happen for me, and maybe it will for when you know it's the same person and I know that's my kid, but I don't know.
Well, Tristan, look man, you've been through a crazy roller coaster and you've you've it's like it's you. You truly are that whole thing of no good deed goes unpunished. So uh, my brother, enjoy the enjoy the motorbiking. Motorbiking, right, yeah, enjoy the motorbiking, enjoy the Philippines. Enjoy whatever the fuck you want to do with your life.
Man.
I mean, you're you're a young single guy with no kids in a remote job. Go crazy, kind of what.
I'm doing, just finding myself again and making the best of it.
Is there anything else that you want to say to the people of the computer or that you want to just talk about it in general before we go.
I do want to appreciate you, you know, calling me up and letting me have some kind of way to talk about this, like I don't, yeah, don't really talk about this with my friends or you know, haven't gotten the actual therapist or anything like that.
So there a reason? Is there a reason you avoid talking about this with your friends?
Oh, it's my close friends. They were like when I told them the kid was in mine, They're like, I fucking called it. So they're not They're helpful, they absolutely are, like it, we joke about shit, we have a dark sense of humor. But they're not someone that I would go to and be like, hey, I feel empty inside, or you know anything deep like that. So that's why I don't really talk to them about it.
Do you feel empty inside?
No? Not really, I think honestly I was. I was depressed and not not exactly happy when I was with her, and now that I'm kind of free again and I'm doing all these different things to get back to being me.
I feel good.
That's wonderful. Man. Look, you know, I appreciate you coming on here and telling your story. I'm inspired by the great perspective that you have on all of this, and I wish you the best of luck and be careful. In the Philippines, I just got back from Thailand and I didn't I didn't realize that it is one hundred degrees all the time in that area of the world. So you know, packishia oh yeah.
And humid, oh yeah, definitely.
Yeah.
I'm from I grew up in Arizona, so that the day I left and moved to California, it was one hundred and twenty six degrees. But that's just to Rai heat. It's not like Texas where it's super hot and humid.
But it's fun. It's cool, man. One thing, yeah, please, I.
Bet I will hit me. To all the people expecting a child, you know, heavily, think about doing a paternity test before you sign anything. I know in Tennessee they now made it a federal crime for a paternity fraud, which is what I went through. Just you know, have that conversation with your partner like, hey, you know, it has nothing to do with you, which is kind of a secondary thing, Like I want to make sure, without any doubt, highly suggested, you.
Know, take care of Tristan.
Thank you, Yeah, take care of law.
That was a fascinating phone call, man. You know that phone call actually reminded me of something that I wanted to take the chance to talk about on the podcast. Just real quick, I thought of I've been thinking about this recently. So a question I get asked a lot that I kind of previously hadn't had a good answer for. I kind of came up with my answer, or at least one of my answers. People will ask me a lot,
like what have I learned from doing this? From talking to all these people like on the street and on the podcast and all that. And I've probably learned a lot of things that I haven't quite yet figured out. But one thing that I know I've I've learned from talking to all these people, truly is that, like fucking life is like a matter of perspective, right, because like, look at this fucking guy that we just talked to.
This guy went through a crazy roller coaster of emotions that for a lot of people could have spent the rest of their life, dwelling on and letting it fuck them up, and letting it make them depressed and fearful and distrusting and sad for a long time. Right. But this guy, Tristan, I mean, he's just he's a good fucking guy. And at the end of all this where he is right now, he's got a great perspect on
his life and he's taking advantage of it. And he's he's not sitting here like you know, oh, I'll never trust anyone and again, I'll never do anything again. You know this, this just fucks me up. He's he's got a really good perspective and so he's happy and he's not empty inside, and he's not he's he's able to
recover because of his perspective, you know. And that's what I've learned from talking to a lot of callers, Because some people will call in and talk about the most fucked up shit, Like remember that guy who blew his fucking arm off, you know, two weeks before he had called me. He was I mean, he wasn't all great,
but he was chilling, joking arounds. You know. Some people will just call and talk about these crazy fucking life situations that they've been in and they get through it, they get over it because they internally have an optimistic, positive perspective, and then other people will be like, you know, my other people will be like, you know, I lost one hundred dollars investing into bitcoin in my life is
completely decimated and I'll never be happy again. Right. So that's one of That's just something I wanted to say, is and I think about it with my own life too, because you know, you know, I get to live a cool life doing this stuff, but you know, I also I get I get I get horribly depressed all the time, and I'm you know, I talked about this a little
bit in a previous podcast with that guy Mike. It's like, how much of this ship is is external life events versus just what you make of it in your own head. And I don't have a fine I don't have a final answer to that question. I'm still figuring all of that out as both my internal brain chemistry and perspective shift, as well as the external realities of my life. I'm still arriving at and answer that question. But I just want to say that's one of the things I've learned
from talking to all these people. Is that. Uh, it's it's crazy important what your brain decides to make of your situation, more so even than the situation itself. But yeah, good luck, Tristan. Don't uh, I don't know. Don't don't die in a motorcycle accident. I feel like I jinxed you. If you if I feel like if now, I feel like, if you die in a motorcycle accident, it's my fault. But you're that's not gonna happen to you because God is good and he will protect you. Tristan, I don't know.
I don't know if that's true. I'm sorry. Good luck, Tristan. Hey, Lyle, Hey, what's your name?
My name is Rocky Rocky.
Is it your real name or does someone give you that name?
Uh, it's kind of a nickname that my friends know me by. It's not my real name.
How'd you get the name Rocky?
My name kind of sounds like a sap and so then it the nickname turned in asap Rocky the Rapper, and then my friends just shortened it to Rocky.
What what's your real name? I mean, you don't have to tell me, but you can.
It's a pretty unique real name, so I prefer not to disclose it.
I bet it's ASoP.
One might think that.
Because you said it was pretty close to a SAP.
It's kind of like that.
Yeah, all right. Do you think people are gonna be able to identify you now so you don't want to talk about on here?
No, it's probably fine. I haven't. I don't have anything like incriminating to talk about.
Okay, Well, what's up, man? What's going on? A A sap? Rocky, I'm just gonna call you. I'm gonna call you a Dan. I've realized this. I don't I can just call people. I don't. I think it's okay because this whole thing, it's supposed to be anonymous anyway. So because I have this whole thing where I forget everyone's name, But why is that? Even Matt? I would rather like, don't even tell me your name. I only use the name something to identify you by. So why don't I just assign
everybody a name instead of asking for their names? And then we can do our anonymous phone call thing and not have to deal with, you know, the bullshit of names.
You know. That's a that's a good point.
It's a good point.
You could start doing that from now on.
That's what I'm gonna do. Oh yeah, Actually I like the name Rocky. I'll call you that Rocky. What's up? What do you want to talk about?
So, I mean I took to you a couple of things. One was that, uh me and my roommates have a nine to eleven themed gambling machine where the jackpot is you blow up Saddam Hussein and Osama bin Laden where'd you get and that's we got it for free on the side of the road. And it like works too, which is like the best part.
You have a picture of it. Yeah, texts to be texted to the number.
Okay, all right, you find it on the side of the.
Road, So what the jack So it's a slot machine and if you what's on the slots, it's like if you get two, if you get three Osama bin Laden heads in a row, it blows up. Yeah.
Yeah, it's like it'll it'll put up like a bomb. And then it's like Saddam has in or some have been laden next to it. They blow up like it's an exaggerated animation. Their eyeballs come out and whatnot.
Oh so this is like.
It's got like a screen and ship.
Yeah, yeah, that's machine kind of stiff style thing.
Do you have do you? Did you send it already?
Yeah?
I think I did. Yeah you should. It's a video.
I don't know, it's a video. Watch this video? What the fuck? Why this video is not playing?
Oh? What?
What's the brand? What's it called? Uh?
The gambling machine is called magic Bomb and then like the it's like from two thousand and two, is the the specific.
Screen thing, magic Bomb slot machine nine eleven. I'm just gonna google it and see if it comes up. No, it doesn't. All right, hold on, let me try to get this video going. This is good. This is a This is gonna be really fun for all the audio listeners, the video listeners too. I'm not even gonna put this video in the fucking thing. So this is just gonna be listening to me watch a video, which I think it's fun. Okay, hold on, I'm still looking for it.
Let's see. Okay, all right, now, this video, this is video is a piece of shit. You you somehow? Yeah, this video is not working.
Yeah, I'm sorry about that. I don't have a picture of it. All right, well I can send it to you later. I'll take a picture when I get home.
Send it to me later. That's all right, never mind, all right, you know what? Fuck this? Fuck this, fuck this? All right? What's it? It's hold on? No, I want to find it, but I we'm also I'm just I feel like I'm just wasting. I don't know if like people are listening to this in their cars right now and they're like, what the fuck I'm watching? I'm listening to a guy try to find a YouTube video magic?
But I guess I guess people listen to podcasts like to simulate like other someone else being in the room, right, and like this is kind of like like you know, when you're in a room with another person and that other person's trying to find a video on YouTube. Yeah, kind of like that. So this, I guess provides something to I just Magic Bomb slot Machine nine to eleven? Is that? Okay? Hello? Osama been magic Bomb slot Machine, Osama bin Laan. No, it's not here? What Oh wait
a minute? Wait, No, it is here. Wait I found it. I found it on eBay. Oh here it is, yeah, okay, I found.
It on Oh yeah, magic Bomb.
I went for three hundred dollars.
Damn, that's cheap.
This is pretty cheap compare. I mean, there's no there's no fucking video of it. Oh you know what it is. It's just the it's just a chip. It's not even the Okay, here we go anyway, all right, it says here you have seventy drinks a week and your roommates think you're in alcohol.
Yeah, pretty much. I've been cutting it back a little bit, you know, but yeah, pretty much. So I was doing this thing where I was living in the woods for a while.
Why we spent like, the good, how long have we been talking about We've been talking on the phone for six minutes and we spent trying to find a YouTube video when we could have been talking about hanging out in the woods and getting unreasonably drunk. Anyway, let's let's and now I'm talking about it more. All right, go ahead, I'm gonna stop interrupting.
Oh yeah, yeah, So, I mean, so I was in the woods for a while without access for alcohol for about three months, and then you know, I was like I came back and I was like, well, you know as well hit it hard. You know, I haven't had booze in a while. So I did that, and then then my next semester of college started and I was like, I have it. I'm going to have a job this summer.
So why were you were you woods? Why were you living in the woods.
My college has a really cool program actually where you can do a semester of college seventeen credits in the woods and live in a tent.
How much did you pay to live in a tent in the woods to do college.
Plus tuition? It was four thousand dollars.
You paid four thousand dollars to live in a tent in the woods.
Uh.
Yeah, but I got seventeen credits and I got to eat three months. I got to eat bear meat, elk meat, a bunch of really cool stuff happened.
You lived that a tent for three months and that was it?
Just you?
Were you alone? Or were there other people living in the tents?
No, there was twelve other students or eleven other students.
And how deep in the woods were you?
We were in the largest designated wilderness area and the lower forty eight, So we were like twenty eight miles from like the nearest civilization.
All right, so plus tuition all inclusive, four thousand dollars.
Well, I mean I paid tuition and then to get out there. The fee for like all the food and whatnot and for flying us you know, out there was four thousand dollars.
Okay, so how much was tuition.
I pay?
Like, oh gosh, I pay seven thousand dollars intuition. Is that a lots?
That's a lot or a little bit of money to go to school in the woods.
I mean, I feel good about my you know, to go into the woods. That's probably a lot of money to go into the woods. I think the biggest thing though, is that I got seventeen credit hours of college while I was also enjoying the woods, you know, so I would have been paying tuition anyways.
It's kind of like you studied abroad but in the woods. Yeah.
Yeah, I studied abroad but in the woods. Pretty much.
It's a good. But when I'm thinking of this tent, is it like a like a knight? Are you glamping? Are you? Are you holding out on me? Yeah?
It's definitely no, it was definitely glamping. They were nice like canvas tents. They were hot tents, so we had wood stoves in them. So when it got cold and like October and one night, stuff at flot wood.
Okay, I thought you were living only a shitty like Dick's Sporting goods tent. Nah nah, all right, so you lived in a tent for three months and that somehow led to you getting drunk all the time.
Yeah, I guess. Yeah. I wasn't drinking for a while, and then when I got back and started my spring semester, I was like, you know what, I'm gonna go ham because I have a job this summer and I won't be able to drink, you know, because I'll be like working a lot. So I was like, I'm only taking twelve credits, might as well take all this extra time, you know, I get it out of my system. And so, yeah, I've been I've been boozing.
And why do you get your Why are you blowing into the microphone?
Am I sorry about that?
Are you outside?
Yeah, I'm outside.
Go inside. I know you like being outside, but go inside.
All right. Sorry, I was at a library and I didn't want disturb people.
It's okay, they.
Can they can probably just deal with it.
You'll probably just deal with it, all right. So how much are you drinking? Now?
Like a bottle, like a field and like two racks a week?
Probably okay, all right, And how long you been doing that for?
Mm hmm about three months?
And how's that affecting your life?
I mean, i'd say I'm pretty functional. Uh, I've got a's in all my classes. I'm like, I'm actually graduating early from college, like a semester early.
So you got a lot of credits the functional. Yeah, if you want to graduate college, I don't know, I'm doing good just to fucking go into the fucking wood's outside of your all. These people are spending all their time trying to graduate early in the in the classrooms. They could be doing it in the woods.
Yeah, it was a really good experience.
Yeah, are you gonna stop?
Yeah?
Yeah, whinning you stop?
I think? Well, I mean classes end May tenth, So I was gonna say, you know that was going to be the cut off.
All right, it's May as we're as we're talking, it's April thirtieth. Yeah, all right, so you have ten more days to drink before you stop. Is that what we're talking about?
Yeah? I mean I don't think I will stop completely, like, but it will definitely just be like a normal reasonable amount.
What's a normal reasonable amount to you?
Like maybe only on the weekends and even then only like five years.
What are you gonna do when you graduate?
Uh? I hope to go work in the nuclear industry.
Mm okay, definitely can't get drunk doing that. Although that was Homer Simpson's job, and he was, you know, kind of kind of bumbling.
Yeah, he seemed to be doing all right, you know, live in the American dream.
Yeah, although that is a cartoon, so I wouldn't base any life decisions around it. What are you gonna do in nuclear stuff?
I'd specialize in like fuel storage. That's what I want to get into, is like fuel storage and environmental requirements.
You're gonna blow anything up? Mmmm?
Nah? Not really my forte.
What if someone pisses you off? What if someone pisses you off, you're gonna blow him up?
Uh? Nah?
That might.
I don't.
I don't know.
No one's ever really pissed me off either.
No one's ever pissed you off?
I mean no, I mean people have, but I don't think I've gotten that angry.
I've never got the last time. When's the last time someone pissed you off?
My housing management ripped a hole in my my tent because they didn't like where I put it, I set it out to dry, and then they when they were tearing it down because they didn't like where it was, they ripped.
A hole in it and find out where they live and send a nuke to their house. You can do that now, That's what you paid eleven thousand dollars to learn how to do. And you must use your skills practically in the real world by blowing up people who piss you off. I feel like I'm gonna get myself on. I tell you all this.
Yeah, I don't know. I don't know if I could get in trouble just by hearing it.
No, you can, you can, you can. I genuinely believe you can do whatever you want you specifically. That's why I'm telling you should blow people up and puts you off.
I mean, yeah, I don't have kids. There are like any obligations.
How old are you twenty one?
All right? Are you gonna stop drinking?
Yeah?
I am yeah.
Are you How confident are you'll be able to stop?
I feel pretty good about a couple of weeks ago. I took like a two week break and I held that up so like I know I can go without it. So like you know, I figure, I just do that again, but for longer.
Is it fun? Are you having fun drinking a lot?
Oh? Yeah, yeah for sure.
What do you do? What do you do when you get really drunk?
Uh? You know, I get I go home, I like howk to my roommates, play video games. A lot of times I just kind of do homework as well, Like I'll just like start slamming while I'm doing homework and then go to bed.
I've talked about it. I may have talked about this before, but I was a handful of only a handful of times I've gotten really sad and I was and I was or like anxious, and I was like, let me just get let me get drunk, see what happens. And I did, and it was it's numbing. That's what I did. Numbs. And I thought to myself, I was like, oh, this, I understand why people do this all the time. It makes perfect sense as to why people do this all
the time, Like because life is. I don't know about you, but like I mean you maybe, I mean we're both very young. But there's like a wait, it's like you're carrying a like being alive. Sometimes it feels like you're carrying a big fucking rock, and when you're drunk, it's kind of like you're not carrying the rock for like you put it's like you're putting down the rock for a second, you know.
Yeah.
But then when you're sober up and you pick the rock back up, the rock is like twice as heavy now.
Mm hmm. Well that's why you just got to keep.
Drinking, that's what they say. But they are dead.
That's a that's a good point.
Yeah, yeah, drinking is crazy. I get why people do it. I get why people do it. But you're too Didn't you have a good time? So when you were in the woods you were sober though?
Oh?
Completely, yeah nothing, I had nothing.
And were you having a good time?
Oh a blast? You know. It was just hiking and taking all right.
So then you've experienced life not getting drunk all the time, and it was good.
Oh yeah for sure.
Yeah, all right, I'm not worried about you. I think you're gonna do great. I think you're gonna be okay.
Yeah, I think you'll be able to stop my roommates.
Yeah, what are your roommates Sayah? Are you with them right now? No, you're at the library.
No, yeah, I'm at the library. I was doing homework and watching your podcast.
Okay, what do your roommates say?
You know, they start getting a little concerned because I'll like wake up poor glass of coffee and put a couple of things a whiskey in it, and then my yeah, class, yeah, but like you know, that's just for class, you know.
Yeah, yeah, I really do get I really understand why you would want to be drunk all the time.
And it's not like it's affecting my life, like, no, it's one hundred affecting your life. I mean I'm doing well, I think.
Yeah, but you're getting I feel like part of doing well is not like I don't think your roommates see you pouring whiskey into your coffee and say, man, Rocky's doing really well. Like that, like being drunk all the time in and of itself is not doing well. That's why there's no such there's really no such thing as like a functioning drug addict alcoholic, because that, in and of itself is a sign of disparity. Mm hmm.
Yeah, yeah, I think you're right.
Yeah, yeah, but fuck fuck I get it, man, I mean, uh, it's crazy.
Going to class sucks so bad. It's so awful. It's so like the just the day, the daily fucking monotony. I have a cool job, and I still can't handle the daily fucking monotony. You know, like this, I mean, talking to you would be so much easier if I was piss drunk right now. But I don't do it. And I'm not saying that because I'm not saying it'd be mean to you.
I'm saying no, no, I get it.
Man, you know what I'm saying. Just life, just dealing, doing stuff, just doing anything. But you can't do that. You can't do it. You can't do it, You can't do it. Yeah, because I'm gonna try to. Why can't you do it? You can't do it because it's not good. It's like I said, being we I could get so drunk. I could get drunk every time I recorded this podcast
and the podcast could be great. But I can't say to myself, you know, oh, I'm doing great because the podcasts are doing okay, I because I'm drunk all the time. It's not good.
Mm hmm.
You. Part of I think being alive is like you just gotta hold you just gotta hold up that rock. You just gotta hold it. It's your it's your rock, man, You own a rock. You get to have a rock. Congratulations. It's your birthright to carry a big, heavy rock all over the place. And you what you're gonna get drunk, You're gonna misplace your rock. No, you don't want to do that. You're gonna hold that rock with pride, you know.
M that's good. That's a good point. GEK, thank you. I appreciate that. Yeah, I'll stop.
Wouldn't it be hilarious if I reveal to you that I was really drunk right now. I'm not, But if I was, it would just negate everything. But that's the thing, if I was, it wouldn't negate everything. I'm saying. That'd be a hypocrite.
You know, I don't think it would. I mean, I think it would give what you're saying credit. You could be like I'm You could say you're trying to stop because you know it's dysfunctional.
Yeah, what else? The woods? We talked about the woods, We talked about Osama bin Laden anything else, rocket, anything else?
Hmmmm. There's a Japanese whiskey that is clear. No, it's like it starts with an age, but it's completely clear, and I just I had some and it's really good. You can tell it's whiskey. But it's like it throws me off because it's clear.
Are you Are you drunk right now?
Lightley?
I thought about it. I thought that was like I thought, I've thought about being drunk all the time as a And I'm not an alcohol guy. I'm a big I'm a I'm a lot of I'm a guy of a lot of different stuff that's not like cool, you know, like getting high all the time and ship, but never it's never been alcohol. Uh, but I've thought about it sometimes, like all right, the only way to chill is to be drunk all the time. But that's your that's not
that's that that's a path exponentially downwards. So I'm gonnaish you some good luck.
And uh yeah, I'll take your advice to heart. Man, I'll be, I'll be, I'll be awfoed.
Okay, all right, We're we're gonna I sound like I'm drunk. We're gonna hang out. We're gonna go into the woods. We're gonna look at trees, we're gonna breathe, and we're gonna trap through the monotony of life with great pride and honor that we were alive to do. So we're gonna try our best to do that.
Yeah.
Yeah, all right, thanks Gek. I mean, I hope you have a nice day, man.
Yeah.
Man, tell the people at the library that you're hanging out with them. I'm sorry that we enter up to their books and ship.
Nah, it's all right, it's all right, it's all good.
Take care rocket.
It's like the group study floor.
Give the nine to eleven, Give the nine to eleven slo slot machine. Wait, wait, real quick, real quick, are you in front of the nine eleven slot machine right now? No, you're not. You're at the library.
I'm not okay.
I was going to say to give it a spin for me.
I will when I get home.
All right, thanks man, all right, have a nice say a gig.
I was just in Vegas. I had a show there, and I stayed at a casino hotel for three nights. And I didn't gamble. I don't like to gamble. I like blackjack, but I've never I've never ever played at a cassi. I played. I gambled at a casino once I did it. Once I took ten dollars, and I put it into the Willy Wonka themed slot machine, and I pressed a button and my ten dollars was then gone.
And that's why I don't like casinos, because they're it's like daven Busters, but you can't play any of the games. But I will say, if I saw like I said, if I saw an Osama bin Laden slot machine, would I put it? Would I give it ten dollars? I gave Willy Wonka ten dollars. I'm not gonna give osamovan Laden ten dollars. You know what I'm not. He doesn't deserve it. For all that stuff goes on the line, taking your phone calls every night, the Repinn goes doing
his eye. He's teaching you to how to over your life, but he's not really an expert.