“I ANSWER TO NO ONE”

Hey, folks, it's Lyle. Before we get into the episode, I wanted to talk to you guys about a new thing I'm doing where you can help support my lizard endeavors by becoming a premium member of this podcast over at Therapy Gecko dot supercast dot com. Premium members, or gek Legends as I call them, we'll be able to get every new and existing episode of Therapy Gecko completely

All from Mike.

Hello, yow it up, Lyle.

Mike, what's regalm me?

Well, uh, you know, just kind of hanging out, wanting to call for a while, Life's Spin, Life's Crazy Man to.

Be honest with me, because I take I take things like that seriously. If you tell me your life is crazy, I'm gonna believe you. Is your life crazy, and not to like any kind of not to anyone's standard except your own, to your standard of creason. This is your life crazy. It's chaotic, yes, okay, tell me more.

Well, Uh, I mean, I wasn't in a relationship for like five years that ended recently, and you know, just kind of dealing with that living in a basement of a family member's house now with my cat, just taking it day by day. I guess.

That's not that crazy.

I guess if yeah, compared to most of the people you talk to.

No, no, no, I'm not comparing it. I'm not comparing it to anyone. This is not in a comparison scale. This is in like, uh just kind of like going by the dictionary definition of craziness. What is the dictionary the diction. I'm sorry I shouldn't have I'm I'm regretful of everything I've said to you on the phone so far.

You don't gotta be regretful. I believe. I don't know if it's insanity that it's doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.

Yeah, you know what, you're smart, because yes, that is what it was. An Einstein. I don't know. It's some fucking smart guy's definition of insanity, and so therefore something boring, the most boring thing you can think of is the most insane thing you can think of by that definition. So I was wrong and Albert Einstein was right just this one time.

Yeah, Albert Einstein's will have been right once.

Okay, you broke up with a lady. Are you dating other ladies?

No?

I'm not taking you know, kind of time for myself. Been uh going to therapy. Oh that's nice. What do you talk about for the first time in my life? The first I don't know. We just kind of you know, I've been chatting with her now for I think like six weeks, and uh, turns out I kind of hate my dad. So there's that.

That's kind of what What do you hate about your dad?

Uh?

He's kind of a douchebag, I guess, you know, he doesn't really talk to me or my siblings at all, and he tries to, but it's very Uh, it's like kind of awkward. I guess it's like when imagine like a stranger reaching out to you all the time, pretending that they think they know you, but they really don't. I'm sure you get that as a lot as a streamer, it would be sure.

But that's what it'd be way weirder if they were, if they were my dad. My dad doesn't reach out to me like that. Well, I mean he does. I talk to my dad, but.

Yeah, I mean, uh, my grandma got cancer, so he asked me to go over to her house and fix up a bunch of stuff. Meanwhile, he was working on putting her in a nursing home so he could turn around and sell the house.

So he asked you to fix the stuff and in your grandma's house so that the house would have a greater market value.

Correct, And he's not even anywhere near here, so he expected me to do everything and then was going to turn around and sell the house and put my grandma in a home, which she asked him not to.

Were you going to get a cut?

Fuck?

No?

Probably not.

Did you do it?

No? I didn't. I've my aunt. His sister called me and was like, Yo, if your dad asked you to go over there, don't do it. And then she kind of filled me in and everything. So I tried to contact him and he's been like kind of ghost ever since.

What's he do? Does he have a job?

Uh?

I don't know. Him and I are very much alike in the way that it's hard for us to keep jobs. I've jumped around from job to job ever since I was like fifteen years old. This is a lot the current driver has. Now I was my longest one.

Why is it hard for you to keep a job?

Uh? Well, that's kind of one. That's one thing I talked to my therapist about. I guess I have a problem with being told what to do and uh, you know, you can't get a short fuse sometimes, but working on it.

You want to be your own guy. You don't want to have to answer to the man. Man.

I would love to be my own guy one day.

But buddy, what you can do whatever you want. I mean, you need money. You just gotta figure that out. How much money do you have?

You want a nonence answer? Yeah, negative twenty.

Four negative twenty four thousand, negative twenty four.

Dollars, negative twenty four dollars.

Okay, that's not that bad. That's not that bad.

No, no, no, not really. I mean I do get paid.

Some people are they have negative twenty four thousand dollars, but you have more than negative money.

Yeah. I can't imagine having negative twenty four thousand. I wouldn't even know what to do.

But you're richer that You're richer than somebody who has negative twenty four thousand dollars. Okay, So you need money? Do you have Do you have any skills that you can What are your skills?

Uh? I play video games?

Okay, and people have made a lot of money doing that.

Yeah, unfortunately it doesn't work out for everybody.

Let me think, what other skills do you have? Uh?

I can change a windshield on a vehicle in less than thirty minutes.

That's a good skill. Yeah, it's a good skill. That's a skill people would pay you to do to use.

Yeah. And it's the cool thing about it is it's kind of like a job. Like there's cars everywhere. I could move anywhere, get a job, but I don't have the the money to do that.

Why don't you have? What? How hard is it to start is a genuine question. How hard is it to start a windshield or replacement company?

I can't imagine it's it's it's too hard. I don't know how hard it is to start a business. I've been doing it since twenty seventeen though, So okay, well.

Got well, because that's the thing is, if you don't want to if you don't want to answer it to anyone, you just gotta start your own thing.

Do you think I should start my own company?

Well, I mean if you if your whole thing is you don't want to answer it anyone, then yeah, I mean that comes with its own not The desire to not want to answer to anyone is a legitimate desire, but it comes with its own set of problems. But as does I Answering to people comes with its own set of problems too, And you just got to examine both of those sets of problems and decide which one you would rather have.

Okay, that makes sense, I think so I think I'd rather. I think i'd rather, you know, tell people what to do, okay, and then have them. You know, there's obviously resentment with that. But if I treat people, what if I treat people right? Hate? Hate's kind of a strong word.

No, if you treat I don't know, I don't think they're gonna hate you. You seem like a nice guy.

Well, I appreciate that you're a nice guy too. And I was watching a stream earlier and you kept apologizing for talking about how much you're going on tour. And I don't think you should apologize for that. Thanks, because you're doing what you want to do and I think that's pretty cool. Man.

Oh thanks, man, All right, enough about me. I want to hear about your Are you're going to start a window business?

Yeah, let's do it, all right.

What do you Well, here's the thing. You could take out a loan, but then you're gonna have negative twenty four thousand dollars. And we were just that's exact shit.

I was thinking about that.

Negative twenty four thousand dollars.

So that's a quick way to make that's a quick way to become negative twenty four thousand dollars richer. Right, So maybe that's not a good idea.

I don't know. I don't know if it's a good idea. I don't I don't know anything about your industry. I only know about you and the fact that you don't want to answer to anyone. And I know that if you don't want to answer to anyone. I know. Here's what I know. I know that you need money to eat food and live in a place. I know that you can get money by having a business or having a job. And I know that if you have a job, you have to answer to somebody, and if you have

But you do, right, Yeah, I mean everyone. I mean there's cars everywhere. You know, people break glass all the time, so it's like it's one of those industries that's needed everywhere. I don't know anywhere that doesn't have cars or glass period.

Nobody in the chat. I don't like to read the chat, but I've been reading the chat lately.

Somebody I closed chat the second you picked.

Up the phone, and I appreciate that, and I should have done the same thing. But I'm I've been reading the chat. The chat says you should become a truck driver. You ever think about that?

Yeah? Actually I moved furniture for like five years and drove UH from Michigan to Chicago pretty much all the time. But the company was paying like shit, they didn't pay overtime. And yeah, but yeah I can. I could see that. You got to get your CDL. Though I don't have a CDL.

I don't know what that is. Certified driver's license.

I think commercial. You might be right though, it's yeah.

That's certified, right, Okay, all right, so so what's the what? What's the plan? I'm fired up by this.

I'm glad you're fired up, because it's been hard to feel fired up recently.

Are you feeling are you feeling fired?

I feel I feel I feel good. I can't believe you picked the phone.

Actually, no, I'm happy to you sound like you're I mean, you sound like these things are crazy.

I mean, yeah, I guess you made me feel like things aren't that crazy though, So that that that that's good. I'm glad I called because of that because I'm I'm thinking I'm spiraling out of control and I don't have control of anything except for my cat, and he attacks me all the time, so there's kind of an asshole. So I can't really control him. But you know, the second that you say your life's not that crazy, it kind of kind of sticks with you.

Okay, good, I'm glad that made you feel good because I thought I was being a dick.

No, I don't think you're being a dick at all. You're talking to a complete stranger on the phone.

Right, I am. I forgot about that. I thought I felt like i've I've begun, I've begun to felt like we know each other.

Well, that's nice. I feel like I kind of know you because I listen to the podcast almost every day and I watch your streams whenever I can.

But why do you why do you not like to other people telling you what to do? Where's that come from?

I've been trying to figure that out with my therapist as well. I guess I don't know. Maybe it's the fact that I don't know. I grew up watching my dad take a bunch of shit from my mom and eventually just like pack up and leave. So maybe I figured if shit goes wrong, I could just pack up and leave.

Are you cool with your mom?

Oh?

Yeah, I love my mom. She's a saint.

But you said that your mom, You said that your dad was taking shit from your mom.

Right. Well, as a kid, that's what that was my perspective. Then you grow up and your parents tell you or my mom tells me stories and like how my dad actually was and then he turns around and treats his kids like he's a douchebag. So why I, you know, believe her at that point he he would lie about having jobs and like go and sit in a farmer Jack parking lot for like hours and then come home and be like, oh, what a hard day at work?

Wait, what is farmer Jack.

Farmer Jack is an old grocery chain. I don't think they're in a business anymore. It might be a Michigan thing.

I don't know your way you're from? Are you from Michigan?

Yes?

So funny because I was gonna say, you sound a little a little bit.

I got that midwestern accent, sound a little bit like Joe Para. I don't know who Joe Para is is.

Not he's not from Michigan, but he is a little Michigan or he did the show from Michigan. But anyway, you don't even know who that is.

Okay, anyway, I'll google it after I get out the fun with you.

Have to do anything.

You don't have to do any Sorry, I probably won't even remember the name.

I know you won't. You know, don't you don't. You don't have to lie to me and tell me that you're going to google my reference, because I do that to people. If somebody tells me something, I'll say I'll google it, and I won't do it. I would rather you just sit with me in reality. Okay, your father would go to the grocery store parking lots and sit there and do nothing and then say that he went to work.

Yes, you'd come home like five five thirty and be like, oh, what a hard day at work? And my mom.

Would shoot because he's Here's when sitting inside of the grocery store bagging car in the parking lot is not that much more strenuous than sitting in the parking lots doing nothing.

Yeah, so why not at that point just get the job right? I agree with you, But as a child, I didn't you know that all that stuff happened. I was like six seven years old, so I didn't know what was going. All I knew is mommy and daddy were fighting.

I take back what I said now that I'm thinking about it, because I spent. I spent and still sometimes spend lots of time in the parking lots of Target, listening to music and eating food and stuff and.

The target parking lot or here though, if you're gonna sit in a parking lot, targets a spot to go. Okay, the good people watching too?

All right, before we go, Well, I don't know. I feel like there's there's more things I want to know about. You sound interesting now we started this out, I was debating you on you not being well. I didn't say you weren't interesting. I said your life wasn't crazy.

Correct, no one's ever called me interesting before, So thank you for that.

You're your your No, you are, And you know what, I'm not going to say your life is crazy, but your life has conflict and drama and dilemmas which make it interesting.

Right. But I don't want that?

What do you want?

I want to live. I want to move to Colorado and I want to live in the mountains and I want to, like, you know, see some things and drink water out of a creek.

Well, there we go.

That's you.

Haven't you haven't brought that up. We've only been on the phone together for seventeen minutes. You haven't even brought that up.

Well, I mean, you know it didn't come up organically. You didn't ask, but now you asked. Yeah, it would be nice to live in the mountains. I don't want to be like a mountain person like Feral, but I think it would be cool to like live like like a little small town like South Park.

I'm trying to think here you you don't want to be a mountain person, but you want to live in the mountains. Yes, it's like how you're doing to be your Your dad doesn't want to work at grocery store, but he wants to hang out in the grocery store parking lot.

I guess we're not that much different.

You said you, and you said that earlier. Yeah, I'm trying to I want I don't want to. I want to leave this phone call with like because, like I said, I'm fired up, but you're not fired up, And I want to leave this phone call with you, like thinking about like with a plan. Do we have a plan? Are we gonna start that window company? Are we gonna move to Colorado? Are we gonna are we gonna do something? Or are we gonna keep sitting by and letting life happen to us. What's your name.

Again, Mike?

Are we gonna see it by and let life happen to us? Mike?

No, we're not. We're gonna grab life by the balls and twist.

It, all right? So what are we doing? Are we taking out of Are we gonna go twenty four thousand dollars into debt? Are we gonna move total debt? Either way? Because either starting the windows company or moving to Denver, we're going into debt.

We'll do. We'll go to Colorado and we'll open the window company in Colorado where there's falling rocks and people break glass all the time. Earth Earth will provide me customers by dropping rocks on people's vehicles while they're driving.

You know what you brought. We brought them up at the beginning. And I think you're I think both of us combined are smarter than Albert Einstein.

That's that's probably true. Actually it probably is. I agree you changed me. Thank you all right?

Are you gonna actually do any of those things?

I'm fired up right now.

Okay, I was fired up for you and you weren't fired up. But I'm glad you're fired up.

Now No, I'm fired up. Now let's do it. We're gonna we're gonna move to Colorado. We're gonna open a window company. Everybody who lives in colleg Colorado, come get class. I'll be there next year.

Okay, I'm not gonna do any of that, but I'm gonna sit you have you. Yeah, it's true. I'm gonna be in Colorado in like a week, but I'm gonna. I'm I hope you do those things because life's too You're you're I I have the similar I don't like being told what to do either. I don't either.

Because I was gonna ask that. I don't know if that's like you can ask me. Like you said earlier, it's it's got to be a common thing, right, But how do you how do you control that?

You don't. It's parties you're wiring as a human being. You gotta work around it. And it's a good It's a blessing and a curse, right because, like I said, those two things, but not wanting anyone to tell you what to do and being okay with people telling you what to do both have unique They neither one is favorable to the other. They both come with their own set of problems. You just decide which problems you're gonna have.

Yeah.

Wow, you're really good at this, man, Am I better than your real therapist?

I mean yeah, I guess so. We I mean, she hasn't really talked to me like this. You you put things in terms that people like be can understand. I appreciate that.

And you know what, you're real therapist. She went twenty four Thus, I didn't have to pay a penny to go live on the computer. You're a real therapist. She uh, you know, she spent twenty four thousand dollars.

Yeah, she's tired. She's tiring negative twenty four thousand dollars.

Right now, twenty four thousand dollars right.

Paying it off, paying it off. You know what, I'm richer than my therapist. That's how we're gonna end that.

It's funny because I it throughout all of history, I've been I'm very much. I am not. I'm leaned heavily into the I am not a real therapist, and I am not even slightly a substitute for real therapy. And I won't accept anybody telling me that I am. But for some reason, on this phone call, you have me fired up. I appreciate each other.

You're right, we've fired each other up, Lyle, all right, thank you. I appreciate it.

What's the name of this business that you're gonna give us the name now, so that in a year, if we remember, we'll look it up.

We're gonna call it, Uh, Mike's glass.

Come on, well, thick again, just try it one more time.

Okay, this is tough. You break it, we fix it.

I like Mike's glass.

Better do that one, all right, I'll do Mike's glass.

Okay, Mike is there anything else you want to say to the people of the computer before we go.

H thank you guys for your time. Can I can I plug my twitch channel?

Oh? You have a twitch? Oh okay, yeah, if you you started saying that you play video games?

Yeah, Tick Safty Pick Saucy two season thick Dick Saucy. Yeah, actually just uh kind of gave up on streaming and then you called me, and now I'll fight it.

Up, Dick Saucy. Okay, I'll try to raid you at some point.

Oh my man, and the next time you're in Detroit, or if if I'm in Colorado by then I'll come see you.

Okay, Sick, don't come see me. And then we want to hear. I want to hear if you if you actually I don't know, I'm if you actually start this glass blaziness. I want to know. I want to know.

I'll I'll send you an Instagram. I'll send you a message on Instagram on my sore front.

Okay, don't do it for me though, because you don't like having people tell you what to do, so I you know anyway, all right, all right, we're gonna go in circles like Mike.

Can I just say. Everyone says you sound different on the phone, and I don't think you sound any different on the phone at all.

You don't know what I sound like when I'm not on the phone, because we've only talked over the phone.

Touche.

I'll talk to you soon, Mike.

Goodbye, Lyle, goodbye.

You know what I love? You know what. I liked that guy so much. I liked that guy so much that I'm gonna take a hammer and smash my car windshield just so I can support his small business. What a guy?

Oh my gosh, Hello, Hi, Oh my goodness.

Lyle, Hi, Hi, I'm all right. How are you doing.

I'm doing good?

Uh? What is your name?

My name? We're gonna go with Jane.

What's up? Jane? I like that's a good that's a classic name. Yes, yeah, what's going on, Jane? How are you?

I'm doing good. I'm just drinking Cayman Jack's bacon bread.

What's came? What is Cayman Jack's.

They're like it's a margarita, but they don't use tequila, so I call it like a speak margarita.

Okay, Monday night margarita. I like that that sounds fun.

Yeah, yeah, I had a them day off, so I decided, why not.

Well a random day off of what.

Of work? I'm getting my car fixed, so I didn't have a way to get to work today.

What do you do?

I work at a large corporation that has a lot of warehouses.

Okay, what's I I guess I could keep going what what's? What's in these warehouses? What are they housing?

Just a lot of products and good groth?

Oh do you work? You're for Amazon?

I cannot answer that.

Oh okay, I'm not trying to get you fired. Can you get fired for talking about Amazon on a podcast? I feel like I've talked to like a ton of people who work for Amazon.

On Well it's a very large company, so I'm sure that there are quite a few people that do work at Amazon.

Well, anyway, okay, so you're on your day off. It's margueritea Monday what and some bread? What's your name again? Jane? Jane, Jane. It's okay. If not, we can just kind of shoot the ship. But is there anything in particular you wanted to talk about today?

So I have two possible things that I would like to talk about. It depends on what kind of mood you're in on the first one has to do with just like my crazy mother and the fact that I didn't realize she was a little unhinged until I was an adult. Or I am thinking about getting plastic surgery, but I'm trying to figure out a way to fund it.

What well, what kind of plastic surgery? Think am I getting?

Okay, So it's not anything that's like per usual, I guess like LA standards, but I feel like I'm a pretty attractive woman. However, I was not really blessed with like like perfect attributes. I guess you can say and I don't want to get you in trouble with like twitch So I'm trying to figure out a way to see you.

Can see, you can say you don't I think with I think with this has been my exp I've been streaming on here for almost three years, and I think with my experience, like you can say anything, but you can't show sexual things. So I mean, say whatever you want.

And are you and you're comfortable with you know whatever? With words, I guess I am.

I am. I am indeed comfortable with words cool.

So I I has been commonly mistaken for as a man because I have a lot of fat in a certain area. If you kind of catch my.

Drists say say that one more time.

I have been mistaken for a man because I have a lot of fact in a certain area.

I'm trying to think of. Oh oh okay.

Uh huh. So when I wear clothes anything, people often mistake me for being a man, And no one ever really like comes out and like flat out asks me, oh, what are you a dude? The only time that that's ever happened is when I go on dates. A lot of people think that I'm like a trans female or male to female type of thing, and I'm not.

So it's all You've like gone on dates with people who think that you're a man.

Oh yeah yeah. And I've even been in a serious relationship where the guy thought I was trans and he was like surprising when we first like had sex that I was not a man.

So you're trying to get like plastic surgery to correct this.

Yes, because like I don't know, like I've grown up with it, so like it started like in puberty where like it started to like grow. I guess you can say it's just fat. And I wanted to get like libosection and like skin removal for it. But it costs where I'm at, like over ten thousand dollars and I only make Yeah, I only make forty thousand a year, and that's even working overtime. So I don't know how to fund it.

So this is this is uh to get like fat removed from your your your pubic region.

Yes, it's called a mon's plasty, a mon's plasty.

And how long have you been? How long have you been looking into doing this?

Since I was fourteen years old? Really, but it wasn't really a thing back then where I live because I don't live anywhere where plastic surgery is kind of big, and so it really became a thing around like twenty like twenty eighteen where I'm at.

So okay, yeah, cass colj are.

Now I'm twenty four years old.

Okay, do you have you have you like talked to have you gotten my consultations with folks and stuff? Yes?

So I I have paid for a consultation recently, and I like did everything I needed to do. I was waiting for insurance to come back and it's not approved, which I figured it wouldn't be. But I'm still I'm like working my ass off every day to save up for this. I started saving up for it like a month ago, when I already have one thousand dollars saved up because I've literally just been working sixty hour work weeks, like as much as I possibly can, and like door dashing.

You want in my opinion on if you should start and only fans?

Well, yeah, because well, I mean I don't. Okay, here's the deal. I don't talk to anybody. I don't have like friends or any like confidants that I can go to. You're just a gecko on the internet who, okay, does not know who I am. So I feel like it's safe.

Why I have I have several thoughts on all of these things that you're saying for the first one is, so you say you don't have any you don't have any friends.

I do not have any friends?

No?

Do you don't have you all? Have you always not had any friends?

Yeah? And that sort of stems from like my childhood, do you do?

You let me let's go back to this. So, okay, so you want to get the surgery because people keep mistaking you for a man.

See I guess like that's not obviously the only reason.

I just yeah, well, so that's what I wanted to ask, is what are the what are the reasons for why you want this? Like does it come from? Because I assume a lot of like plastic surgery stuff just comes from like uh, I don't know, like self esteem things and whatnot. What's what's what else is kind of is fueling this this uh desire.

So I cannot go to like a mall or a store to find like specifically pants. I for example, will go to like a mall and spend the entire time that the mall is open just to try to find pants that like fit me in a way that like does it look terrifying and like meme worthy to everybody else? And I also like, excuse me, it is definitely like

I feel like, huh okay, all right, So with this only fans thing, you said, how long have you been considering doing that?

Maybe for the last six months now. I just am afraid of people that I know to find out that I'm doing it.

Okay, m hmmm. Well, look, I can't tell you whether or not you should start in only fans. This is a personal decision. But huh yeah, I don't know. This is This is a tough one here. This is a tough one here because I get I understand why you uh, you know, don't like uh being stared at, or that you feel like your you're the center of attention that you didn't want that you don't know how to mitigate exactly. Yeah,

Yeah, so it started when I was like around twelve, but like it really became prominent when I was fourteen.

Mm hmm hmmm mm hmm.

Well, I guess and and you know, for forgive me if I am out of line, but like what's coming to mind now in my head is like, you know, look, if you're telling me, let's start about how how do you just feel as a person going through life?

Do you feel good? Do you feel like uh.

Oh no, no, no, no. If i'd be completely honest, well, okay, I feel like I have a good head on my shoulders. But okay, I've definitely been through like a lot of things that like I'm still working on and like it kind of is causing like a lot of like confusion on where I want to go like as an adult, because I do still feel very much like a child.

Is that mean? Okay? Yeah, I guess in my head, I'm like, you know, like I understand why you're might want to get this surgery to correct this thing that you're self conscious about. But I'm like, you know, and I'm not I'm not saying that you shouldn't do it. I'm not saying you shouldn't you know, No, I do whatever it is that you want to do to go and get this this surgery. Whatever you feel like is the right move for you. But I'm also kind of thinking, like,

Well, while I I feel like or GEK, I don't know which one you prefer, but okay, I you know, I throughout my whole life sort of knew that, like I had a lot of stuff I needed to work on, and I would say that like it's I started working on, like obviously the issues that caused me to have social anxiety and anxiety and depression in general, as well as

The inside, you know, one step closer to being the person that I see on the inside. You you look at you look at getting a surgery.

As as that, Yeah, because I it probably like is attributed by like I'm sure body dysmorphia, but I definitely feel like I look different, Like like when I'm not looking in a mirror, I feel like I am just

And it's the same questions.

I'm thinking, yeah, and I I you know, the honest answer is, you know, like I know this is sorry, I'm a little nervous. I didn't think I was going

What is your uh, what does your therapist take on this whole thing?

She told me straight up that like I haven't done anything for myself my whole entire life, and that if this is something that I want and I can find a reasonable way to do it and pay for it in a way that like I feel like is smart because I'm not a big believer on like putting myself in a lot of debt. I'm actually just almost done finishing off like all my payments towards my debt. Yeah,

So huh okay, mmm, well you know, listen, I mean, I mean, look, I'm on a level with you here. I think that you're you know, definitely dealing with things that are you know, real therapist territory.

Yeah, yes, hmmmmmm, I guess you know, well, I don't really need your opinion on the whole only fan thing. I guess you would be a good person to ask for like how to like promote yourself.

You you want, you want, you want market you want marketing advice for for your only I could give you more if you looks, I can't. Here's the thing is I cannot. I'm I I cannot tell you whether or not you should start an only fans is a personal decision. But if you have made the decision yourself to start one, and you would like marketing advice, I you know, I could give you marketing advice perhaps, but but so so so listen, so huh huh, Well, I you know, look,

Yeah, my therapist is great. I started seeing her recently, so it's going good.

Redd. It's a good place to promote your only fans, I think.

Okay, cool, thank you, you're well.

I'm glad I could do something.

Well.

Yeah, no, it was either that or like my whole thing with my mom. So I'm kind of glad that you chose that because that was probably smarter.

So do you have any kind of like other final thoughts on this that you wanted to share before we go?

Yeah, it's okay to struggle and it's not abrout perfection, but progression.

I like that.

I like that.

Jane, all Right, I got it. Right. I got your I remembered your fake name. And that's a thank you for calling Jane. I appreciate it. You have a good one.

You two get thank you.

You know, sometimes I feel as though my gecko head is a bit too bulbous. I don't know how much money that surgery would cost to get it thinned out. But I've learned to love it. I've learned to love it.

Call from a j Hello is this file?

Yeah?

Who is this? This is aj Hi aj?

What's up?

Not much? Just being a gecko on the internet. What's up with you?

I'm watching the Gecko on the Internet. I actually I tried calling a little more than a year ago and got a hold of one of the screeners and it was like towards the end of an episode, and I was going through an episode.

And I'm a lot.

Better now, So okay, it's cool to connect with the get go.

Yeah, man, is there anything in particular that you wanted to talk about today?

Well, I suppose I could talk about what I was going to talk about. I got fired from Starbucks for eating a brownie that I didn't pay for.

Damn, well, you got fired from Starbucks for eating a brownie? That you didn't pay for.

Tell me more, well, it was a university, like a campus Starbucks, and a part of the culture for everyone working there was to like eat the food, make drinks for yourself.

It wasn't like a.

It was just weird, like the fact that I got fired, terminated on the spot, like it was just a little bizarre, a lot to handle.

Was it like a special brownie where it was dected to have nuts in it?

No, man, it was like a preprocessed, pre package two packed brownie in a plastic sleeve. And iuse have you worked in food before? You know what I mean?

Like, because I would understand if it was if it had nuts in it, because nuts are they're pretty expensive, so I would probably, you know, would make sense to fire you for eating a brownie with nuts in it. But just a regular brownie, I feel like that's that's illegitimate.

Yeah, but on corporate standard, like on paper, it's like that's aft and theft it.

To answer your question, I used to work at a frozen yogurt store, and you better believe that I fieved lots of cookies and cream yogurt directly from the fucking dispenser into my mouth.

Oh what about like the fridge in the back with the toppings.

Oh yeah, well I worked at it. I worked at a frozen yogurt I worked at the best I worked at the best kind of job, which is a job at a failing business. It's the best kind of job because.

I it's all on the way out, It's all.

The way out. So I would I mean I worked at this frozen yogurt store. All the candy there was stale, and nobody would come in. It would like maybe one person would maybe come in, uh every shift, And so I was just like kind of I was more guarding it than I was like watching it. And dude, I was in there fucking eating cookie though bites and making milkshit. I mean it was not good.

But yeah, so you know because at one point in my life I also worked at a frozeny ever play, can you tell me what is your because like building a yogurt cup, there's a process to it. What is your bottom layer?

Uh, let's see. I usually mixed cookies and cream with red velvet cake. I put a white chocolate drizzle on it. Uh, some butterfinger and uh yeah, that was that was it. I mean, that was so damn. Even thinking about that right now is making me. Yeah, okay, all right, So so what's so you got fired from Starbucks for eating a brownie? You know, good? Justified? What uh what are you gonna what are you gonna do now?

Now?

I am an elementary school teacher and I teach yoga.

Okay, well, don't eat one of the kids.

I won't.

That'll get you for that'll get you fired as well. Yeah uh what so you teach yoga? Yeah? How is that?

It's it's pretty cool.

Man.

I was practicing for a while at a studio, and by going more and more, my healing process started to go a certain way. And I thought, maybe if this is working for me, I can share this with other people. And and I've been teaching for a little more than a year now and I'm kind of hitting a stride and have a consistent following at the studio that I teach at. And it's pretty good, man, Like, I just enjoyed it.

Do you have a man? Bun?

I am bald?

I like, I feel like that's even better for a yoga teacher. Look, what do you? Go ahead? Go ahead? No you what do you teach at the school?

So I'm the permanent substitute teacher. It's different every day, but I'm also in the process of going through a teacher license online so to eventually be I would like to be an elementary school teacher.

You know, I was thinking we had some wild substitute teachers, uh back in the day that had they really had no idea deea what they were doing. And like I'm looking back on it as an adult and I'm like, where did they fucking find these people?

Yeah, it's uh, especially now with the state of education across the board. If you have a pulse, you can have a substute teacher's license, and there are there are some weird ones.

Uh.

I remember having a substue teacher back when I was in middle school that was pulling from a bottle like behind the desk. We didn't We didn't know it at the time, but you know, like you get older and you think that probably wasn't Coca cola.

Oh she was. She was getting drunkn a class. Yeah, well, there are movies that make that look cool, so I kind of understand.

Yeah, but uh, I think where I that, like most of our subs are pretty tame. Mm hmm.

I think if you're I think if if you can somehow prove that you are better at teaching world history when you're drunk, you should be allowed to do it.

Oh, I mean that's what is What was that series? Drunk History?

Was that on? Like?

Yeah? Yeah, there was, there was There was Yeah like that, I mean there was that. There was that, So that.

Would be reason we're so passionate. But it was like they a little bit more. It unlocked these hidden memories and they were able to make connections they didn't know that they could make before.

All right, So yeah, I mean that's alcohol. It's like you know how people you know how people say that like taking shrooms like will unlock your mind and make you smarter and stuff. How Come no one, no one ever says that about getting.

Wasted because you can't remember it.

Maybe it's because you're Maybe it's because you were too powerful.

I don't know, man, I think there's some like blacking out. I think there's some truth to that. Like you I don't remember if you're on it grid that sticks with you, like it's the only thing you think about for a few days after.

So are you happy?

Yeah? Man?

Are you? Are you happier? Than you were. When are you happier than you were when you, uh were a fucking working at Starbucks?

Absolutely? Immediately after that job, I started working in landscaping for the summer, and those were you know, ten hour twelve hour days and Starbucks was only ever an eight hour day. I was more stressed out and miserable in those eight hours of Starbucks than I ever was working outside.

Huh, huh uh do the call? Oh, okay, all right, important question. Who is more obnoxious Starbucks patrons or a children.

Starbucks patrons?

Oh?

Without a question, I mean, what's.

The uh.

But it's also through in the context of a Starbucks that is on a campus like that is a very specific population.

Oh you were at it. You were at an on campus star so everyone was a college kid.

Yeah.

Oh, tell me about these fuckers. What kind of things were they doing?

I mean, like white mocha with ten pumps of white mocha, extra phone or green tea, lemonade, ten pumps liucaine, no eyes, you know, just like the the most time maintenance stuff, and it's for them. I think it's more like a control thing. I want this person to make my treat exactly the way I want it.

Yeah, right, they Well, when you're in college, you're just saddled up with debt and uh you're upsettl yeah, and everyone's telling you what to do. I feel like I feel like, uh, the one bastion of control they have is like making the Starbucks guy through their white mocha exactly the way they want it. That's what they regrets for.

Yes, and it wasn't you know, they were using their meal swipes for Starbucks. You know, it was not even real money for them, and they were just so demanded.

Can I want to say this too? I hate I'll say I will say this on record. I don't care if they reach out and they're like promote Starbucks for actually know, if they reach out and they want me to they want to give me a lot of money, then I'll take this off the record. But I hate Starbucks. I hate it. I really do for a lot of reasons. For a lot of reasons. I don't like their coffee, and everything they do is so expensive, like those fucking cake pops, the little one bite of cake.

It's like for for no reason.

And you know what's worse is people pay it and they love fucking Starbucks and they love.

They prop their phone up and gets the sunshine right behind them and get their selfie and tagging.

Yeah yeah, I mean I mean Duncan Donuts far superior brands, far superior. Yeah, they have a better connection. But the thing about Duncan is that it's less. It's less like high class advertising, like like Starbucks is kind of advertised as like a legitimate fancy coffee shop, and Tunkan is a little bit more fast foodie, but it's it's superior.

I'll tell you though, man, Starbucks food is fast food. Everything is in a plastic bag and you throw it in a microwave and you give.

It to him.

You know, they're paying eight dollars for a hot pucket.

I don't.

Yeah, well, well was it worth it stealing fast food to get fired? It sounds like it was.

I think. I mean the manager taught me like mid bite, I mean, I took it off of the tray, walked into the bag. It was like, you know, a line past the door. I was super stressed out, just like ripped the bag open, took a bite out of the brownie as a manager opened the door and saw me and then turned around, walked away and then a week later, I was terminated.

What's your name again? Will?

Huh?

What's your is your name? Will a? J oh? What's next? What's next for you? You were you worked at Starbucks, then you were a yoga elementary school guy? What's your deal? What's how's your life end?

It's it seems like everything is always in transition. But I'm working at the school and landscaping season is starting up again in a couple of weeks, so I'm preparing for that, you know, and uh just living, you know, plugging away as a teaching license. So this summer hopefully is the last summer eight landscaping, and then I can get a teaching position for the next school year and just be school teacher.

Well, I hope that doesn't suck as much as it sounds like it does.

It's I can also say, though, like as far as landscaping companies go, the particular one that I'm at is I don't have some foreman breathing down my neck, you know. It's most people are pretty cool. It's just long hours, but it's good working. You don't know, man, Like you're outside, you have your hands in the dirt. At the end of the day, you can see that you've done something well.

Listen, Will Is there anything else you want to say to the people of the computer before we go.

Be well and know that you can choose to be well. I'd like to ask you one thing though.

It's true you can choose to be well unless if you have terminal cancer. What were you gonna ask me?

Oh?

Oh, yeah, that is true. What is the best console Velda game?

Oh?

I don't know what I played. I haven't played. I haven't my I haven't. I haven't played them all to say so, I can't answer your question just yet. But I asked me, ask me again when I asked me again at the end of this year. I'm probably gonna start playing them again. But uh, I mean, I like Breath of the Wild, but I I haven't give me some I can't answer that question. I haven't fully played them all yet. Okay, it's yours.

It was always offering of time, but in more recent years, I'm like more a Twilight Princess guy, I don't know.

Okay, I want to play Twilight Princess on the Twitch on the switch, but it's it's on. I don't think it's on there yet. I'm gonna play sky Words Sword soon, so we'll see how that is.

It is you played that, Yeah, I'm actually playing that one now.

Is good?

Yes, and no, I think it has the best storyline. But as far as because it's like we game, we mechanics late games, Skyward Sword is kind of bad, but the storyline is amazing.

Okay, all right, I'll play. I'm gonna play it despite your scathing review.

It's not I mean, the storyline even just like the tut seams and you know, Lincoln's all to talking to each other. It made me cry and that's you know, it's great.

Well, you know that's I think that's really pathetic. That's okay, I'm bekicking. I'm probably gonna cry too. I'm probably gonna cry too.

Mhm.

Right on, man, this uh, this made my night. I appreciate your time. Keep getting hey.

You too, take care will all right, thank you song, every teaching you.

M