Oh is this a deripist guy?
Yeah?
Yeah, oh shit, I don't why bad I think you would call back.
Yeah, well you texted me and you said you wrote get a real job, buddy. I called you and you didn't pick up.
Yeah. I was just like kind I was mad because I was like, hey man, I wanted to talk to this guy. You know, I'm the following your page for a minute. I didn't think it was actual texting.
No, it's this real. It's all real. These are real. Like people are like, oh you made all the callers are AI, and it's like you're a real and then they become one of them and then they are like, no, I'm real. Then the whole thing must be real.
Yeah. I think you had like I know you're a real person because I think I saw you accomplex time, like a few years ago. Yeah, and uh yeah, but like I didn't think it would be like a real person. I thought it was one of those uh just like you know, get you to call and join the thing type of you know, but I do apolishize for that.
No, And you know what, and I I and I'm actually I totally could I do a lot of marketing and stuff and I'm I'm going on tour and like it'd be helpful, but I don't like it. I hate that shit, you know, like uh, I hate like I hate, like if you sign up for one thing, like if people like there's a thing you can go to therapy getto, I'm just gonna I'm gonna market right now. If you go to therapy Gecko tour dot com and you put your phone number in it, can I'll text. I can
text you, like those phone numbers I keep. But like I I've thought about it. People have told me they're like, are you keeping the data of all the people that call you? And I'm like no, I'm why not you.
Should because it's like you know, I got I called because it's crazy. I was like, actually, uh, in need of a therapist and like I have both of sessions today and like I've been following you for a while, but like that post, I mean that your story, like I had to happen to random. You see it like six minutes before you got posted it and I was like, oh shit, like.
Well wait, okay, real quick, do you think it's don't do you think it would be fucked up?
Though?
If by calling that phone number I just like opt you in to receiving texts from me.
Per se. I wouldn't care, but other people white, you know, so it's a different thing. Like some people just like, hey, getting annoyed with those texts, you know. But I want to mind, you know, on my phone, I do social media marketing myself, so it's like, you know, I'll just say poor an info for sure, you know. All right, mind it, all.
Right, I'll put your phone number specifically into my list. Hell, yeah, what city do you live in?
I'm in Las Vegas, all.
Right, I'm coming to Vegas. I'll put your phone number in my thing. Anyway, what are you coming on here? Uh? Ship, I have no idea. It's this this year sometime. I'm this year, I think the Fuckingmbary or September. Okay, I'll be there in September at almost the end of the year. Anyway. Okay, you you successfully got a hold of me because you insulted me, and I want that to be a lesson to everyone as to how to get a hold of me, because I like, I'm a I'm a I'm a masochist
and I love being insulted. What is your name again? What's your name again.
My name is Sean, but I go by Saint St. Louis, but like st.
Yeah, uh Sat, this phone call can be whatever you want it to be. I'll but I'll ask you, is there was there a particular reason why you called today? Uh?
There was a few things, man, uh but like more so yeah, I mean, like, so, how can I make this an ongoing thing?
How can you make it like.
Like an ongoing thing like I could call you or like pay like our subscription type of thing because I want to get h.
Can you say that word for me one more time? How can you make this so what thing.
Like a like an ongoing thing, like a constant.
Ongoing Oh oh oh oh oh. I'm not a real I'm not a real therapist saying I'm just this is just like a calling the show. Do you really think I was a real therapist? Did you think I was a real therapist?
I mean you said some real ship before that, I like was like this guy, know I'm talking about.
Wait saying fuck you. You texted me saying get a real job, but then you did, but then you and you but you said the text well, thinking that I was a real therapist. That doesn't make any sense.
I mean, yeah, it was just like uh like like the minimum thing, like you know, I was just like, I mean, I knew that would get you to respond though, honestly, like you know, you saw anybody like you know, like it's like you call somebody a a dumb ass like you know, like and then they don't even to say nothing back to you. Like I knew that would make you respond, like you.
Know, but it doesn't even make it. But that doesn't make sense because if you knew I wasn't a real therapist, if you don't, but if you saw it, but if you thought I was a real therapist, then why would you say, get a real.
Job, Because like I don't really see that many therapists like doing the social media thing. I know it's like sound like an oxy want it sounds very retarded, but I don't know, bro.
But yeah, okay, all right, I'm all right. I'm gonna disclaim for you that I am not a real therapist. There is no way to make this an ongoing thing. The only time with you that I can truly honest to God, uh promise, is the time that we are spending on the phone in this moment right now. Okay, with all, But with all of that said, we're in this moment right now. Do you wanna do you want to talk? What do you what do you want to talk about? Hell?
Yeah, man, so like right now, Like I just got pulled over earlier. That's kind of got me like a little you know, on edge because but they let me go. You know, they had my girlfriend pull up take the car, uh because I had a suspended license, you know. Uh. But yeah, so that was like the one thing that was bothering me. And it's just like, uh, you know, the thing with my girlfriend, you know, she's just like, I don't know, just always making me out to be
irresponsible person. But I'm the guy that pays all the bills, you know what I'm saying. So it's just like the yeah, those are the things I want to talk about that.
Okay, So your girlfriend is making you out to be irresponsible, yet you're the one paying all the bills.
Yeah, so it's like, I don't see how I could be irresponsible person. You know if I'm still making sure all the bills are getting taken care of and all the checklists are getting checked off, you know, you.
Know that that's first of all. That's a classic. Second of all, I empathize with you because in my I think I have in my opinion, clearly it's clearly the wrong approach to this is to go if all the bills are paid, that means that I am responsible and all. Also, it is a thing that I in my life have felt, uh not not necessarily in a relationship, but just like
in my own life. I'm like, you know, as long as I like in my own life, I do have a thing of like, well, if all my bills are paid and I'm like financially responsible and stuff, then that translates to me being just generally responsible. And I've had the same internal feeling. But that's all that's fucking obviously not but you, but you, but we both know that's.
Not you know that, Yeah, the littleless of mistakes. Man, everybody just want to start, uh you know, just talking I want to say, talking crazy, but just saying all these uh shit like that are not even true, you know, I formation.
Uh it can be, but uh, okay, you're what is your girlfriend? Okay, when your girlfriend is upset at you because she says she's you're not being responsible, what does she say? What does she specifically point to as being irresponsible.
Just like like my spending habits and all of that. But I just feel like, you know, like if I have it and if I can like you know, like I said, go back to the thing of my ability and everything.
Is taking care of. Why are you like you know, just like so adamant and anal about all those things, like you know, it don't make sense, and you're like putting me down, you know, instead of just you know, just uplifting your man. You know, you're saying all these things that's you know, bringing me.
Okay. You so you've identified your spending habits as a thing that she says is irresponsible.
Yeah, but like you know, I'm the type of person I buy and sell things like you know, I buy, I can buy and sell anything. That's just like what I'm good at, like you know. So it's like I'm on marketplace all the time looking at like used cars off the you know, used cars or shoes or anything.
You know. So it's like she's always it's like, you know, just don't I don't get it, like you know, if it's working, I just need somebody to be more supportive versus you know, just like nitpicking at the little things.
That's reason, that's a reasonable feeling. Uh No, you said it could be manipulative. What do you in? What way do you think she's trying to manipulate you?
Like? That's like I think in a certain sense, like just to just kind of get her way, Like I mean, she always gets her way because like I mean, I'm buying here whatever she needs.
You know, what is what's her what's her way? What does that mean? Uh?
Like her way beathing? Like she didn't want me spending a lot of money. She wants me to stay home. She just wants me to not be the person I am, you know in a certain.
Sen Okay, so how long are you How long I'm gonna you know, I'm gonna try to I'm gonna actually try to. I feel like I typically approach things diplomatically and I'm going to try to approach this with whatever is in my gut. But I still do I need more information? How long have you been with her?
Uh? We've been together five years? About six right now?
Okay? Five years? On? Off go on and says are you the one making all the like? Are you like, are you guys living? Do you guys have a thing where you're living together, and you're like financially supporting her.
Uh yeah, I mean she can financially support herself too, but it's just like it just doesn't compare it to what I make, you know. So it's like I end up with all the responsibilities because you know.
So like you so, like you pay the rent.
I pay there, I pay both the car notes, we have another we have like a big warehouse. I pay for that. So it's like, okay, I don't get it.
You know, so you are you are so you are in some sense like subsidizing her life financially.
Yeah yeah, I mean I guess because it's like if I'm the main provider.
Okay, but like do you here's do you do you like doing that? Does that make you feel good? Do you feel good when you're being that kind of provider? Oh?
Yeah, because it's like I'm like, you know, I'm I'm African, you know, so like I come from a family where we all had to take care of each other, you know. So it's like me finally being you know, the age that I am and the responsibile enough to do that, like you know, uh, it just gives me that satisfaction that like I'm like, I'm near, like you know, I uh, I'm like I stepped up to the plate.
So so listen, so so listen. And I think this situation is probably a lot more This situation, I is
probably a lot more complex than this. But like my gut feeling with that, my gut feeling with this thing is like if you're okay, manipulation and the idea that somebody can walk all over you because you're giving them so much, and that the idea, this idea that somebody can manipulate you and take advantage of your financial resources or your kindness or you know, any anything that you can give them, right that is that kind of a
like that idea that do you get okay? That I that idea is kind of predicated upon the idea that you are providing this financial subsididy subsidization and you're providing your kindness and you're providing these things with a particular expectation in return. And part of me kind of thing a little bit. And I don't know what your guys' relationship is, Like, I don't know what those expectations that
you have are life. But I but I but I, but I, but I part of me does feel like if you're gonna be this provider and you like providing, and you like being the one in the relationship that's financially doing all this stuff, and you're gonna give this out. Part of me believes to the extent that is realistic and barring extremes, you kind of have to if you're gonna do that, do it without expectations.
You know what I'm saying, all Right, I'm not Yeah, I get that, I get that, and I'm like, not expecting nothing, bag levery like you know, respect.
Sure, that's a that's a fair and those are fair, those are fair expectations to have. I I agree. I don't know.
I'm not say she doesn't respect me, but I just feel like a lot of my boundaries definitely get crossed, you know, in the mixt of somebody trying to prove point, you know, and.
Trying to try to prove a point.
Yeah, and then that's that's what I mean by like she trying to get her way and do all of that, is you know, somebody trying to prove a point, they will go to like the extremes, you know, or just say, like you know, some lowball ship to just like trigger you you know. So it's like I mean, like I deal with a lot of PTSD, like you know, so I just got into like an elevator accident not too long ago, uh you know, like in July. So I'm still like dealing with her like a lot of that stuff.
So it's like, you know, just like people yelling your loud noises could just like you know, cause me to just like you know, just go like in a state of panic sometimes, you know. And she knows that, and I just feel like and those uh like you know, I get like that if you know a person, you should more so try to comfort them, you know. And you do you do you tell?
Do you say all these things to her? Like everything you just said about like like do you do you those things to her?
It's easy to say, like you know, to another person, but like you know, when you're saying these things to your partner, it's never reciprocated the way you needed to because it's like always uh I guess.
Well hold like like uh forgetting about her? How she kid said like did you did you say these things to her?
I haven't tried it because I like not those words in that form, But like I'm trying, have.
You have you you? You have you have feelings of resentment towards your partner? Have you and and I'm not talking, I'm not and I'm not on the subject of whether or not your feelings are valid. I'm asking, like, if have you expressed them to her.
Like that? I think. I'm like, I've tried in different ways, in other ways, and I just kind of got shot down because it's like I was saying earlier, it's more so a response versus a listener and response, you know what I'm saying.
Yeah, it's more.
So a defense right away when I get to say that type of stuff, you know, So I guess. So, I mean, I don't know, man, I think it's.
Dude, Okay, I'm gonna I think I'll let you finish before I jump in with a bunch of ship.
I think more so trauma bonds, you know, I hate that, Like you know, this year, I want to have a good relationship and I want to pour into my girlfriend who probably they will eventually beat my wife, you know, but before I get married with anybody, I just feel like I need to work on these things. You know, these are very important things for me because you know, I want to bring you know, fully functional kids with
loving parents in this world. You know, if I if we do do that, because I mean we were together like five years going on six, like you know what war am I waiting on after this point? You know?
And she still hasn't She's and and and over those over those five years, you guys have had conflicts and problems, and for sure does does she does? She always respond in these conflicts and problems in a way that makes you feel as you as though you are you are not being seen or heard or felt or understood.
Yeah, because it's like, uh, when I get to say, you think she has air pods, you know, she always puts on here. He always puts in her air pods. You know. There's been numerous occasions where she was just playing music when I'm doing that, you know, and it's just like I'd.
Like you'll be you'll be expressing yourself and how you feel, and and she just puts in her air pods.
Like yeah, she always has whatever AirPods in her ears at all times, you know, because she owns her own business too, so it's like that's for you know, word purposes. So she always has what a airpod's in you know, so she'd be trying to do this thing sometimes when she trying to tones me out, that just makes me even more mad. You know what I'm saying?
Do you.
So?
Okay? I was like, when you say, I haven't expressed it in those words? What do you? What words have you expressed it in? Like how do you typically? Like do you get are you?
Are you?
And it's okay, you know whatever the truth is is fine. And by the way, can you hear me?
Yeah, I can hear you.
Okay. By the way, I'm not trying this is not like a blame thing. I'm only just I'm mainly focused on I just just just so you know, I'm mainly focused on you because you're the You're the one with the agency over like just working within the realm of because if I just said your girlfriend's an asshole, that's what's that's not helpful to anyone, you know what I mean? Like, I'm just trying to within the realm of of what
is of you? Have you have you okay? With what words and with what tone and with what uh level of whatever? Have you expressed yourself to her?
So like with me, right, I'm a pretty loud person, but like I.
Don't okay, all right, okay.
You know. I mean I'm like, if I'm gonna tell you things about her, I would have to also say things about me too, you know, just keeps you two way street.
Yeah.
So it's like I'm a person like I will talk to you. I'll say like like, I'll talk to you out a reasonable voice, like at least once or twice even three times, you know. And then it's just like if I'm constantly like not being heard or understood when I'm talking out a lower tone, I'm a definitely raise my voice because it's like, why am I, you know, constantly repeating myself? Why are you? You know if you heard of me? Like what is the point? You know?
That's kind of how I feel about it. So I do tend to get loud after the third or the fourth time of me having to repeat what I'm saying over and over again, you know, if it's not being reciprocated, I do tend to I don't get physical at all, like your live sisters, so I can't like do that till women, but uh, I definitely do get loud, you know. So it's like I don't like that, okay, And I feel like that's the only time she actually does listen because as soon as I get loud, like she focuses up.
And it's like that's also like good and your things in my head because it's like, well, I don't want to keep doing that, Like why do I have to raise my toew to start up octave?
Yeah, that's a bad that's a that's a bad habit for that's a bad habit for that relationship to have, for sure. So I I mean, yeah, I have a few I'm gonna try to speak just from my gut feelings. And I'm also I don't know, I'm I'm pretty agnostic. I'm trying to fucking navigate life and relationships just like everyone else's. It's and there's no and it's just been to the fact there's no objective reality anymore that or
or or or right or wrong. I mean, on the extremes of course, there's right or wrong ways to do a relationship, but anyway, but anyway.
So.
Two things is one, you're like, yeah, you've like trained, You're like training this thing where if I get really loud, I start screaming. She that's the only way to get her to respond. I don't have a I'm not a I'm not a trained pere mediator or anything, as you now know. But that, but but that can't But that can't be the right way to do ship, you know what I mean? That can't You know, that can't be. That can't be the wrong way to do ship.
So.
That we both address that.
So yeah, so you know, so you know, you know, it's got to be something else. And then here's the sad thing that my gut is telling me is if you try really fucking hard, and I mean it, like you go into yourself and you try really fucking hard to present yourself in such a way where you're like, I don't want to be in conflict with you. I don't want to yell at you. I'm reaching my hand out to you in peace, trying to appeal to you, trying to willing. I'm willing to understand you, and I
just want to be understood. Let's have a conversation about these things. Let's have an open, honest conversation, no yelling, no fighting. I just want you to listen to me, and I want to listen to you, and you and you really just you just really appeal to her like
that in that kind of way. Honestly, Okay, if you do that multiple times and she doesn't respond in a way that makes you feel heard, you unfortunately have to accept that she may never ever ever will And you can it's perfectly legitimate for you to decide, in light of that knowledge that you still love her and you still want to be in a relationship with her, and you still want to fucking do this, and you still want to support her financially, and you still wanna have
a kid with that, you still want to do it. You can decide that your love for her over powers the knowledge that you have in your soul that she will never ever ever potentially who knows that it's not a guarantee, but but but you have to accept your love over her over the idea that she may never truly attempt to understand you. That's a legitimate thing for you to do. I don't know if it's the smart thing to my dad, I don't know if it's the smart thing to do. I don't know if it's the
smart thing to do. But you can do it, you know, my dad. My dad was on this podcast, like a couple episodes ago, and he was like going through this whole thing of like what do you want to do and what's the smart thing to do in that situation where you have a deep love for her and and you're taking a bet that she may one day understand that. Either you're taking a bet that she may one day understand you, or you're just accepting that she made it.
You could let I just think you could it possibly live a happy life where you love her so much and you want to be with her and you just accept that she'll never see you. You could maybe live a happy life that way. But it's totally not It's not the smart thing to do by any.
It's like a one it's like a one side of a relationship when it's like that.
But no, it's just like, you know, you can decide that's what makes you happy, But I don't know if it's a smart thing to do.
Yeah, I mean, it's just like the definition of love is different for everybody, you know, and I don't know, Like it's just like I don't know, man, You're right, I definitely got a lot of things to think about, man, because I don't want to carry on with this if it's like you know, constant like headache. You know, I want to drive, I want to do and I want to like you know, expert with a partner or whatever,
you know, or even by myself. You know, it could happen, but it's just like, you know, it's just certain things that I love about this person. You know, Like God, I've been with plenty of women, and it's just like I see things differently that this person does that I haven't seen in other people, Like you know that I like that she has a routine. You know, it's just like, uh, they're taking care of me aspect. You know, it is there, like you know, she cooks me lunch, dinner, her breakfast,
wakes up, she goes, beats our horses. Uh, she goes like you know, she's like taking care of all of the duty.
I know what you mean. Yeah, I know, I know you man.
So man, it's like I haven't been with the plenty of girls that do that, because a lot of them will just either be childish or just be like why would I do this? You know, she comes from a different background where.
It's you both say you sound like you sound like you both are into like the kind of traditional masculine feminine roles of a relationship. Yeah, yeah, and that's and that's that's a perfectly legitimate way to have a relationship if that's what two people want for the real relationship. But you know that it comes with h you know what I mean. Every every TV show that describes that traditional relationship is involves a main involves a guy who
is upset that his wife won't stop nagging him. You know, like that's just part of the part of the fucking thing. And I look, you can you can live a happy life like that, but you can live a happy you can live a happy life like that. But before you make that decision, just no, just it's have the information
that you may never be seen you. Maybe maybe maybe maybe this will be I don't know, man, Maybe I'm I'm truly like navigating uh my philosophy on relationships in real time as I'm talking to you and as I'm thinking about it, as I'm living my own life. Uh maybe this woman, uh you know whatever, cooking for you and and and doing these sort of traditional things and whatnot. Maybe that's just maybe that's her version of of seeing you,
you know, that's her way of of loving you. And and and loving someone can be can be seeing them in some way. Uh but and and it's perfectly legitimate if you decide that that that's something, but this particular way that you're trying to be seen, you have to accept that it might it might never happen.
Man.
But before you do that, before you accept that for you, before you accept that that that that you may never be seen in that way, just try appealing to her on a on a on a on a different on a different level than uh uh, you know, anger and aggression. I think that's where you start. Of course, of course it hasn't been fucking working. It's it's it's not a good thing to do.
But why do we always human is always thing like forest anger is like the way we can get things done. Like it's never been the case like you know for anybody in this world.
You know, did you did your father yell at you a lot? Sorry? I know that's a thing more so.
My mom than my dad. Like, you know, it's different type of thing. So I mean I also think that might be like a mommy issue thing two going on near it that that's not fully addressed, you know, I mean, that's you know, we all live between the mom or the daddy issue, you know, yeah.
Saints Sat. Sorry, I was about to end the call, but I want to I'll let you finish.
Hell yeah, I mean I'm cool with that because I just got to my ranch right now too. I got to see the the sources real quick.
A ranch. Yeah you is that your You own a ranch?
Me and my girl, well like her and her family do, but like we have a whole bunch of horses here.
Oh okay, all right, so you're literally yeah, no, you're living the like you're very like traditional kind of thing, like a farmer and his wife. Uh yeah, your phone started sucking. Okay, I don't know what you just said, but I'm gonna I'm gonna know how I I could infer something what you said? Okay, do you think would could I have fooled you that I was a real therapist for.
Sure, because just like I mean, the advice and everything, and gay was like pretty head on.
You know, I'm just I'm just I don't know what I am. I'm high.
It's just a great lizard or I don't.
Usually I don't like to admit that I'm not high on every single episode, but I'm high on this one.
Yeah, as you shared, Bro, I love he quit smoking weed where this year. I've just kind of been smoking, like you know, here and there. But shit got to bra to make it through life.
No, I don't think that's what you just said. It is not a good thing. I don't. I think I don't. I mean I currently smoke weed to make it through life, but I don't think that's healthy. I don't know. I don't know anything about our stupid world anymore. Could you say your name one more time?
Man?
I'm sorry. Oh Sat, Saint St Stan San Sat.
We got a lot more here in Vegas, Bro.
Yeah, I'll be there September twenty First Wise Guys Comedy Club.
Oh, that's like up the street from I got a photo studio right up the street from Bear, so yeah, we'll definitely pull up. I'm gonna bring over a lot of the guys.
You have a photo studio.
Yeah, we do photo videography. We actually are like work with like a lot of higher artists like that.
And you're in a fucking photo studio and a ranch. Yeah, who are you?
Man?
You're really and you buy and sell ship you're doing You're doing good man, You're doing, and your fucking wife owns a business. That's awesome.
Yeah, Hey, we're gonna smoke the blue when you get here, I'll show you around the city. You know, you can pull up to the shop too. You know, we can get some stuff going. So we got a screen priy shot too. So if you need a lot of merch start or whatever, you're out here, you can get that done for you.
Okay, Man, I appreciate you. I appreciate you.
You got a friend of me now because you definitely turn my good man.
I appreciate that, saying all all right, I'll try to I'll try to hook up with you, and uh, you know what, send me a send me a d M. If you see, if you see after I announced my tour dates on Vegas, if I might, you might DM me and I might never look at it or respond to it, but you also might. Yeah there's a chance this, there's a chance it could happen.
But I'll be like, check your DMS.
That's that would get me, That would that would get all right?
All right? Bet, I got you brother, Thank you, man, you have a blessed fight.
Yeah you too, Man, take care all right? Bett? That was Saint. I liked Saint. That's still just so funny. Why would he say get a real job if he thinks I have a real job. He just knows how to he knows how to push my buttons, Saint, that'd be cool. I'll go down there and hang out with him and his ranch slash his his ranch slash, screen printing shop slash, whatever the fuck thing.
That was?
That was? That was nice.
Hello, no way, man, no way?
Wait? Why is this you?
Dude?
Yeah?
What's up? Brother? What's your name? Oh? Man?
Brother?
Yo, I'm Rio.
My name is Rio all right, oh oh yo?
Oh dude, Yeah, yeah, dude, how are you?
I man, I'm doing pretty all right. I I feel good today. I feel good about life. I feel good about doing this. I know we've been on the phone for like forty seconds, but you seem like you have a nice energy. I'm excited to talk to you. Have we spoken? Have we had there for?
We have not, Brother, we have not.
Man. I've been a Yeah, I've been a caller since probably, I mean I've been a listener since I got to say.
Twenty twenty two and cool.
You know, I've tried on occasion, I've tried to tried to call in. But you know, you just got you You've done You've done a lot of great things within the last five to six years. Man, I've just it's it's great. It's great seeing you just do what you do. Man, I just want to say real quick, you're uh, you're walking across the pan video that you you know, you put out a couple couple of weeks back, you a couple of months back. Man, it just it really hit me in a certain I mean just it's just there's
a lot of resonation. Man, it resonated a lot, you know, a lot of resons my bad.
Uh, yeah, thanks, I'm sorry.
Yeah, I'm just.
Man, you don't have a thing we said. Sorry about it all. Man, I'm no. I I'm glad that that well, yeah, I'm I'm I'm happy that that video is resonating with people. You know.
Yeah, I mean, I mean you and I. You and I are really just a couple.
You and I are really just too dudes. Man, We're just two dudes.
Uh, just surrounded by a bunch of other dudes and and and other you know, dude deads girls. Just we're just two people, man, just you know, we you know, we're just dealing with the same ship that other people
around us are dealing with. And I mean I remember one of your one of your just another one of your videos, you know, just calling the guys talking about his issue and something you really said that you know, it's you know, just a lot of you know, I'm just I'm trying to do my best to apply as much as I can U just from everybody I encounter. But you know, you just say, sometimes you just got to do stuff. Sometimes you just got to get up and do stuff. And I'm like, I I was like,
fuck man, yeah, I'm like, screw all this, you know. Oh, let me get my you know, let me get my diet right, let me get my sleep schedule right before I can really start going to the gym or going to the park and just going on walks and.
Just like fuck that.
Just just do stuff, man, you know everybody you know, I my I do, I got too much of all or nothing mindset.
You know what I mean. Just just do it, man.
Just sometimes you just got to do stuff to get yourself out of that funk. And yeah, man, I just you know, you're just a great guy, dude. I I I can't I really.
Can't believe I'm actually calling you right now.
Man.
I do just want to say it's a What time is it where you're at right now?
It's about eight pm? Wh oh wow.
Yeah, I just it's about six It's about six twenty something over I'm out in Phoenix, Arizona.
Man.
Shout out six oh two. You're a six oh two listener, shout out, shut out, Phoenix, Arizona Man. I yeah, it's about like six thirty right now. Man, I'm I'm kind of at work right now, and oh my gosh, dude, I just can't believe. Oh my gosh.
Well, you know, I.
I I'll say, I'll say a few things. It's funny what you're saying to me, because, uh, I mean, for those for anyone who doesn't know. I made this video where I walked like through like the Japanese countryside and I was kind of talking about like depression and this existential crisis that I was having at the time, and uh that that eccidential questionis was really real. It was really really real, and the depression was really real, and I feel so much better. I fuck, I took that
walk a year ago almost damn. I mean, the video came out in May, but I took that walk about a year ago, and I feel so much better since then. And the main reason, I one of the main reasons I think I feel so much better is because I've been, uh just just busier. I've been busier. I've been trying
to be a part of a community. I've been making these uh these videos that I'm really enjoying doing, and I you know, so it's it's interesting that that's what you gleaned because that's uh definitely been my my my, my findings. But Rio, I have a question for you. I don't know if you have time to talk. You sound like you're If you have time to talk to great, but let me let me let me ask youe this It's okay. If not, I'm sure we can find our
way into a conversation of some sorts. But uh, do you was there something specific you called in to want to talk about?
Not really, man, I kind of just you know, I was on a little fifteen minute break. I go on Instagram, like the many times I do, and I saw you were calling and I was like, I saw, I noticed you posted it not even seventeen seconds ago when I saw it, so I was like, if there's time to there's a time to roll the dice, I might as well. And look, Wi, I just wanted to say, man, you're just You're one.
Of the very few people who so within.
The last couple of years, just.
Within the last year. In March, it'll be a year since I just dropped out of uh, since I dropped out of college, man, and uh, I've honestly felt the
most free I ever have felt. And just I that was around the time you and you know, you know, you had made that one of you you had posted a video just calling another guy and you had said sometimes you just got to do stuff and yeah, anyway, I just wanted to say, man, you know, I I you know, I've had a I've one aided my life in certain ways where I just, you know, I just had to relearn a lot of things. And it doesn't help being I'm twenty I just turned twenty one a
couple of weeks ago, so I'm I'm really young. Man. I've grown up with nothing but computers and internets and phones and ships. So I really have to I just have to learn to live without that.
Man.
I'm making a conscious effort to live without that stuff. And the reason I'm going to that, man, is because the the very few times, you're one of the very few people who I've come across on the Internet who has a very large and growing platform who actually feels
like a real person. You're one of the few people on you know, you're one of the few people with the platform that I come across that just you actually feel like if somebody like, yeah, you really you really represent just what what a person is, man, You really represent what it is to be just a human.
Just you know that.
And and I think a lot of people I don't. I don't really feel the need to elaborate, and I feel like a lot.
Of go ahead, Well, can I ask you this? So you've made a conscious decision to uh get rid of tech and phones and and uh all this stuff. It's I think there is something going on, and it might be a little fringe of movement, but it's a fringe but growing movement of people, uh kind of rejecting the tech crazy landscape that we're in. So I want to know what was the catalyst for you of taking this this this this shift, and then how's it been gone?
I just do you know, the dude, who plays the punisher, the dude to what's his fun?
What's his name?
Like, like, I am not drawing a blank o name, Yeah, John burnhal.
He he he hates naps.
He's like they're There are multiple videos of him talking about how much he hates naps, and I feel like spending hours and hours.
Yeah, he hates naps.
And one of the justifications earth, Yeah, he says, why does he Why does he hate naps?
One of his justifications And I can understand this to an extent is he's basically saying, the whole world is moving while you're sleeping at while you're taking a nap
at three pm. And you know, I can to an extent, I understand that, brother, But I guess my point is I feel I that it's I applied that to just doom scrolling and spending time on the phone on the internet, whether it be to just you know, pointless scrolling, or it just just spending time on the internet just being immersed in that world when reality is just going outside and looking at the sun and listening to all the different birds chirping and you know, saying hey to whoever's
walking their dogs across the sidewalk.
Outside of you, you know what I mean?
Yeah, I know. Here's the thing is, uh, I don't think that should apply to naps. And I'm gonna tell you why. Is because what I hate about scrolling is that you you can you can just kind of like find yourself scrolling, you know what I mean. You can just be like it's so uh, like it's just your habit for you to just pull out TikTok and like before you even know it, you've spent all this time scrolling. But it's funny because you can also do that with
a nap. You can find yourself napping as well. But if you it's all about intention. I think it's all about intention. That's what I hate. I hate when I I hate when like the phone like steals time away from me that I didn't give it. Like if I sit down to watch a movie or or play a video game or something, and the time is like I'm choosing to spend my time doing this or choosing to be with certain people. That's I think like it's it's about the intention more so than it is about the
the activity itself. And typically we were kind of engineered so that you find yourself just scrolling on this What have you been doing instead?
Man, I've just been just reading more, man, just picking up books for just the sake of doing it. Man, I have you know, It's funny. I was never the best student growing up, but I just you know, I've collected a bunch of books that I've had just over time in school and just have encountered and just you know, friends tell me about this book and whatever.
Man. So I've just been reading a lot more.
What are you reading?
I found a book at this antique store many months ago I want to stay around may or June, and it was by this man called Oh it's by this man whose name was William H.
Dan Firth.
It is called the book is called I Dare You, And it's the book is essentially him sitting at one end of the table and you're on the other end of the table, and he's saying, there are things that you want to do, but for some reason you're too scared to do them. You feel that the time isn't right. And he's saying, I dare you too.
I dare you to do it.
I dare you to live in every way I live.
I I dare you to go through with all the things.
That just just scare you, you know, all the things that you're putting on hold because you got to do you know, X, Y and C. First, you know, it's it's it. If it wasn't, if it wasn't tying into everything that you were talking about. You know, I don't know what.
I don't know what I was being told at that time, or you know what I mean.
Yeah, well I believe that. I believe that. I believe that to an extent for sure. What what do you feel like you're putting off?
Well, I've just always you know, I think I'm just putting off certain certain heart you know, just certain things that I know are difficult, and well let me let me, let me be a little more, let me be a little more honest. Is that I've I haven't had much these past this past these past six months have been some very pivotal six months. And that's just because I've given myself the time to just go to the BLOrk and just you know, go walking, to just read books,
to just write. I mean, dude, if I had if I wasn't able to park.
Well, so are are you? Are you putting what do you what do you feel like you're putting off right now, right now.
If I have to just look at where I am currently at right now in my life, i'd say I am putting off. Hmmmm, I'd say I'm putting off. Yeah, I honestly just you said this earlier and and it really it stuck with me. It's just I think I'm putting off really just kind of going out and developing a community of my own and and and you know, in one way, justin to just yeah, just being a little more social. I'm I'm very I've always really been to myself.
I've never been.
I guess I I've gotten used. I've gotten really used and comfortable to.
Being yeah, yeah, just being.
Yeah, yeah, I got myself.
Are you in college?
No?
No, no, no, no, I dropped out in March. It'll be a year since I dropped out.
And oh yes, I'm sorry. I'm sorry you mentioned that, you mentioned that.
Yeah, no, I'm not at school, man, I just uh right now, I'm working at a.
Sprouts farmer's market. It's been two years this month.
And the most like, the most socializing I do is when I'm not working, I'm always at my nearby, my my closest park and just playing basketball there. I'm going there from usually six pm to eight pm. And yeah, so you know, I you know, that's that's what I that's what I've been doing for that.
That's great, you know, just a.
Way to way to Yeah, it's a great way to stay fit. And you also, fucking I'm sure you meet people who are going to the courts pretty often.
Yeah, I mean, yeah, we're all boys, you know. You know, after you know, after seeing the same group of guys for you know, a couple of weeks straight, you know, you just kind of you know, you get some know their names and just it's just you know, just dudes being dudes, man, And it ain't you know, it's it's really no, it's it's not. It's never been an issue for me to just be an elevator with a couple of dudes and you know, make small talk and be
be cool with anybody. It's never been an issue, man, women, child, It's always been an easy time to just you know, talk to people and just kind of just be just be able to you know, just be received.
Well.
You know, uh, I've I have, I've been on the Standoffer's side too. And it's funny that really came off within the last couple of years. And that's just because I don't know, I can't I can't really say I.
Was surrounded by.
Did you ever feel like growing up a lot of friendships were just conditional?
Well, inherently they kind of are when you're growing up, right, because if you're on the bus, you just are friends with whoever else is on the bus, you know. But I, I mean, I got I got lucky because my friends and I we all kind of like grew up and developed a similar sensibilities together, and and and you know, histories and whatnot. It is. I guess you sound like when you say conditionally, you're referring to some specific feeling.
Well, yeah, yeah, I guess I mean for you know, I guess the example I was going to is, you know I did formative years is growing up as a younger man. I just uh, you know, I played sports. But you know, when you're not really good at them, you are you are more or less an odd man out when when it comes to at least just being on team fuck it, whether you're at recess, you know, if you're not good, you're not you know, you're excluded.
If you're not good at this sport. If you're not funny or if you're not you know, if you don't you know, it was conditional.
I see you mean yeah, okay, yeah, okay, that makes more sense.
That makes more sense, dude, even even I mean even especially growing up.
I I you know, during the you know, in the two.
Thousand and ten, even if you didn't have a phone, you were just left out to an extent. I mean, you know, I feel like growing up and this is you know, this is certainly for me at least. I know, I can't speak for all the other billion people and you know, in the world, but you know, there's just you know, it's just a there there have been mass waves of just so yeah, just comparison and comparison kills personality,
and there's just it's she asked me. It's just there's a lot of that was just you know, just coming in, just coming in low and truckloads just you know, with the rise of social media and as every kid just started having a phone, it was kind of you know, people just became less personal.
Hm hm hm hm rio real real rio hm hmm. I think that you have a good hunch to try and remain connected, but don't. Don't people do? People do this all the time, and I I try not to like the idea. I don't know if you still believe this. I don't know if you still believe that relationships are conditional. But try not to hold onto that idea too tightly, because I I I often find that you kind of
find whatever you're looking for. So if you view the world as like inherently I mean, I mean, the world is well, I mean the world is an inherently I guess conditional, but like just what just just just try not to be too on guard, you know what I'm saying, Like, like if you're because if you're because if you're, if you're so afraid of being like taking advantage of then you're just not going to be like open when the opportunity presents itself for you to be there, you know.
But I think I think you're by going to the fucking uh uh basketball court and just like trying to socialize more. I think you're doing well for yourself rio And you know, it's a good idea, But I also I also like, inherently, uh, if your nature is to stay to yourself, you're I think you're doing a good thing by reversing that because you're it's better to be connected than to be uh, you know, jerking off doing nothing,
I mean jerking off. Jerking off and playing video games is because you're off from playing video games is really cool. But like I ideally, I try, ideally, I try to make it so that like you want to be, you want to be jerking off and playing video games because you're tired or taking a break from being connected with other people. You don't want to bet the reverse where you're mainly jerking off from playing video games and then
occasionally seeing people. I figured out a life where I could jerk off multiple times a day and play video games and still talk to people. So I do know it's doable.
Do not apply this to yourself while if you feel the meat too, then you know that's up to you. Uh I now that I actually like, I'm just glad to have a little platform right now. Anybody's listening to any band, any mail. Please just understand pornography, you know, steemen, retention, those things are first of all, pornography is something to stray away from, and it will kill your mind. It will it will will fuck up your brain more than
heroin just as much, if anything. And I also want to say too that semen retention practice practice practice.
Boys.
Boys, y'all got to get your mind right, y'all got to get your mind right. Steman retention is simple power. It is just power that if we release constantly, we will not have power.
That is literal drive.
That is you're bury. You buried the lead. You buried the lead. Here to go ahead, go ahead, go ahead, and then I'm gonna give you my yeah, go ahead.
Well look, man, I just want to I just want to take a couple of steps back. And I'm really glad you asked me what am I avoiding? Because maybe I'm not thinking. Maybe I'm still a little bit thinking. Maybe I'm thinking inside the box two. But no, man, I've just had hunters. I've just had hunches to just go and do things, just go, and you know, I don't take the time to just say, hey, I have the time to just drive up you know, to the you know, just up north to you know, flag steps stuff north.
Sorry, I'm gonna, I'm gonna, I'm gonna, I'm gonna I'm gonna interrupt you. Uh what why why are you? I I agree with you on porn. By the way, I do think porn is like inherently not I'm not gonna go. Listen, listen, I'm not going to go. I'm i I'm not gonna go as far as say that porn is evil, I don't think porn. I don't think porn is evil, but I think it's you know, I think porn is like donuts, you know what I mean, I really do porn is like donuts, like you don't like. I don't think don't.
I don't think donuts are evil. I don't think people who make donuts are evil. I don't think, you know, the donut industry is inherently evil all that stuff. But and listen, I think I think it's phoenix. I think it's nice to have a donut every once in a while.
I think sometimes you need a donut, right whatever. Like the healthiest a person who's now, a person who is eating healthy, it's probably not eating donuts, maybe in the same way that a person who has UH is practicing healthiness of the mind in general is probably not eating donuts. But I don't think donuts are evil, And I think, yes, if you hit a don't if you eat donuts every day, every morning and every night. That's probably pretty unhealthy. Yes, I I I agree with you on that with porn.
But why do you why do you? Why? What's up with semen retention? What is that? Why are you obsessed with not coming?
There have been They're just it's ancient. Mystics have practiced the the practice of semen they have, they have taken part in the practice of semen retention for you know, alchemy, alchemy reasons, you know, purposes regarding out can be.
Literally you literally think it gives you superpowers.
Essentially, dude, I mean there, I mean, there are there are chemical over there, there are chemical overlap there. There my bad, there's chemical overlap between the brain and just steeming retention. I know there are I know, like.
I'm gonna be I'm gonna, I'm gonna I'm gonna interrupt you. I if I had the choice between being able to levitate and being able to masturbate, I would choose masturbating easily. Superpowers don't, I don't. There's nothing I can do with them. If I like if I, if I if you, if I could trade, if I could trade my ability to come for like heat vision or whatever, I would I'd keep coming. Coming is more applicable to my life than
any kind of superpower or alchemy. I don't. I'd rather coming as a greater place in my life than alchemy does. There's nothing useful I could do with superpowers.
But that's because you've only done one of the things. Though, Man, I mean, look, I've never levitated. I can't. I'm not gonna speak for you. But it doesn't seem like you've ever levitated.
But no, you can speak for me. I probably haven't. Yeah, go ahead, what what what superpowers are? What superpowers are you trying to get?
Look, I'm just saying.
First off, I'm gonna say first, I'm gonna say this first, that he vision would get my grilled cheese right. And the second thing I'll say is levitation. What is the apex of you know, of coming? What if that apex you reach when you come that fog? What is that's what you feel levitating? But just the entire time your your ass is separated from the ground, you know what I mean? What if that's just what if that's just the feeling that you have when you're stationary in the air, just.
We've only got I would just then I would if levitating feels if levitating feels like coming, then then I'll just come instead of you to get it up.
You get what I'm saying. If they're equal experience, do the easier one.
I think it's like skiboard. I think now we're on like a ski skiing and a snowboarding thing, like you know, it's a.
Yeah, you know what but this is but I don't. I don't know.
Man.
What's your name again for you?
Yes, sir, yes, sir man.
It is real, real, real, real. I'm going to say this before we go. You. First of all, thank you for the very kind words.
Man.
You seem like a really nice, uh sweet dude.
I love you.
You're a guy.
Thank you, brother, Thank you.
Brother.
I I think I'm glad to hear you're getting out of the house. I'm glad, you know what. I'm glad you're not watching poor and it's probably not. It's like, yeah, you know the doughnut thing, and you know what, it sounds like seemen retention is going very well for you, so I mean, yeah, keep keep keep doing what you're doing.
Brother.
Yeah.
Is there anything? Is there anything else you want to say to the people of the computer before we go.
Before that, I have to ask you a question.
I will answer a question.
What do you plan on coming to Phoenix?
Bro?
Uh this September. I'm about to. I'm not gonna. I'm announcing a bounch of tour dates very soon. I just gotta do the like in like February, I'll announce a bunch of tour dates and ship so I'll be I'll come this month though, I mean not this month this year.
You'll get it right, man?
Then?
But okay, well, I'll say if you say to me, you're like, I'm the guy we talked about levitating and masturbating, I'll probably remember.
Levitation and masturbation. We got it, brother, I will say this before my sendoff. Man, is there there is only one There is only one eternal shared consciousness that is taking form of absolute trillions, and that is us.
There's only one conscious.
We all share one conscious and that is why we all have similar memories and similar ideas. And I mean they're like that, that whole one conscious, that eternal shared conscious that that is God. A lot of people aren't ready for that conversation, but God, that concept of basically divine source is consciousness. It is the fabric of reality, and there is only one and we all share it.
We share it with the birds, we share it with the spiders, with the dogs.
We all humans only see zero point zero zero three five percent of the light spectrum, so that entire ninety six percent whatever that's for the other living creatures that see different waves of light and see the echoes of sound waves. There's only one consciousness.
And uh, you know, we're all one. We're all one, and we're just supposed to love each other. And love will level leve will transcend us all from this third dimension. And hile, I love you, man, and I'll see you when here in Phoenix. Man, I just know levitation and masturbation. Man, you're a great guy, dude, And just keep on putting smiles on people's faces, man, because you've been doing a great job at it.
Yoh, stay safe and get blessed. Real appreciate you, grek blessed brother tick care That was Rio. You know what's crazy is think like, I don't think Rio was high when he was when he was talking just now. I
don't think he was high when he was saying. Oh, that's stuff about humans can only see a portion of the light spectrum is Uh, what's crazy is think like things that like like you know, when like a guy has like an acid trip and is like talking about this ship and you're like, what the fuck is this guy talking about that? That person is always right, everything, everything real. I'm sure a lot of you heard what Rio's talking just now and you were like, this guy's high.
What the fuck is he talking about? And you're valid and you're valid to think that. But he he was just he was right about one hundred percent of what he was talking about. It's all true. It's all true where there's one consciousness. He I don't think he was high. I don't even I don't think you need to be high to come to that conclusion. It's true. Yeah. Sometimes sometimes I'm like, fucking I'm on that ship, you know
what I mean. I'm like thinking about, uh, there's only one consciousness, and I'm thinking about the divinity of the universe and shit. And then someone's like, uh, you know, maybe maybe you're on the divinity of the universe and shit. And then your girl is like, uh, you know, making cookies or something. Your friend's making cookies, your boyfriend's making cookies, someone's making cookies. You're on the divine universe and you're talking about this shit, and then your friend making cookies
is like, what the fuck are you talking about? And you're looking at your friend like you don't. Fuck, you have no fucking idea. You have no fucking idea what I have discovered about how the fucking universe is one and that we only live one life and that we are grains of sand and a vast desert of consciousness shared by the birds and the ants, and all the show you're freaking out. You're like, you're so, you're like,
this fucking person, I'm saying this too. They don't fucking what the like, they can't even comprehend where my mind is right now. And then they're like, have a cookie, and you eat a cookie. I like, this cookie is good, you know, And then it's like, hey, the person baking cookies. They were it's like you can look. You look at them, and you're like, oh, they're like they're not on my level of consciousness. And then you're like, well, motherfucker, they're
more conscious. They're they're they're seeing shit that I'm not even seeing, which is that cookies are good. They're not even seeing it. They're doing better than seeing it. They're expressing it everything. You're fucking up here thinking about where you're looking at people and you're like, they can't, they can't be on my fucking level of consciousness. They're they're they're actually they're at a higher level of consciousness than
you are because they're not thinking about this ship. They're living it. They're doing it. They're making cookies, they're painting a they're calling their mom on the phone, they're taking a walk and looking at something. They're living this thing. So we're all It all evens out the consciousness, the spectrum of consciousness in that way, you're either living it or you're thinking about it, one of those two things. Personally, it's probably a little bit. I think it's better to
live it. I'd say it's eighty twenty eighty five fifteen eighty five fifteen living thinking. That's a good ratio. I take seventy thirty living thinking. But you want the majority to be uh living, baking your metaphorical cookies, whatever they may be. Week goes on the line, taking your phone calls every nine every.
Weak and goes to his hide.
He's teaching yours loud in the of your life, but he's not ready.
An expert