DOJA CAT GIVES ADVICE AS A GECKO

Don'g a cat.

Hi.

What's been the most persistent thought on your mind lately? I don't know.

Freedom, freedom, Yeah, just like being able to do things I like to do, and like instilling boundaries. Boundaries have been on my mind.

What boundaries have you been setting lately?

Like professional boundaries and and kind of just really just boundaries in general, like a like relationship boundaries. Like if I'm talking to like a guy and they're like, let's go get drinks, I'll like be like, I don't trust you. I don't even know who you are, Like I don't know you. If some guy told me that he wanted to move into a cabin in.

The woods, like he was like, he is like an invite.

He was inviting a movie that was his opener.

What in what context did somebody just come up to you and invite you to be in a cabinet?

Dating app?

You're on dating apps?

I'm on I'm on a dating app?

Can I can I ask you what dating app you're in?

I think so, Yeah, I think I'm on Rayah.

You're on Rayah.

Yeah.

I think I'm allowed to say yes. I can say that, yes, I am on Riyah.

I keep getting rejected from Riyah. Really, would you give me a referral?

I don't do Honestly, you're not missing out on anything, really. Yeah, everybody looks the same. Everyone has the same haircut.

What haircut is it?

Caesar?

What's what? Other kind of like opening line, what's the worst Riya opening line you've gotten?

Oh?

Boy, it was long and that's why it was bad.

People are I mean, I have to imagine when people match with you on Riya and they're composing a message, They're doing it like it's the most important thing they've ever put that.

Down exactly how it comes off.

Yeah, And that's the thing is, I'm sure it comes off like that every time.

That's the craziest thing.

Some people like will write like a paragraph and it's like almost like a stand up like bit. It's like they have like a beginning, middle, and end to it.

Yeah.

Yeah, and it's like relax, Like I do the opposite of that, because I feel like that's more more chill, more trustworthy to just kind of not really say anything meaningful at all.

So like I just I'll be like, hot, do you do you ever just get a hay?

I don't like that. I don't like, Hey, it makes me sad. It's like someone's sitting on their phone, Like I imagine them on their phone and they're like, hey, you know what I mean.

So it needs to be somewhere between hey and here's something I had chatchypt right.

For me, it has to be creative. I really value creativity. So like like I say, like to some guys, I'll be like clap it and they'll be like sure.

It's like it's like, no, I want to do something yeah, more.

Just like something stupid and it doesn't. I can tell when somebody is saying something stupid because they're trying to be funny, or if they're actually funny and they just say stupid things. Like some people, like a try to be funny when they approach me, and then there's some people who are just like literally just naturally pretty funny and are chill and cool.

This is one of the tough things to realize is that like your intentions and what you're thinking subconsciously, it always comes through whether you try really hard. Yeah, because if someone's composing a message where they're trying not to seem cool, them trying not to seem cool comes off. Yeah.

Yeah, I see patterns as well on Riah Patterns. So and you have a description, and your description will like whatever, you can put whatever you want. And I notice every like ten guys, there's one guy who's like, can't wait to match and not talk and never meet, can't wait to never meet. Do you have to put a bag on that?

No, you're fine, really free not free advertising, familiar highlights, sick, oh yeah, go crazy.

And yeah yeah yeah yeah, there will be like every ten guys, some guys like really bitter and it's like you don't know that, we can tell that you're bitter, right right, Like relax. It's a dating app. It's not gonna be fun. It's like gonna be fucking sad.

Did you did you use dating apps before you were famous?

No?

I didn't. But I tried to go on Tender and there was a guy who had a picture of him in front of like three exotic cars or whatever, and he just looked like a criminal, Like he just looked and he had his glasses on at night, and that usually says a lot about people. And so I never went back on again because of that one guy.

Are you for Riyah? Are you? Are you looking at men and women are just just mess me. What's the like. Let's say that somebody, Let's say you had a friend who just got on Riyah and they asked you for advice on how to build a good profile. What would you tell them?

Put pictures of not just yourself looking hot, You should put pictures of things that represent your sense of humor. Some people don't, I guess don't have a sense of humor sometimes, and that's fine, that's life. But if you if you're like funny and cool, like like, let people know that. Let that be known.

What uh like you? What are you looking for on Riah? Are you? Are you like for love?

Hot funny babe? Mm hmm, hot, funny, hairy babe with a cool with a cool vibe? And who who is like not? I don't know who like has an opinion? I like people with opinions, like some people just like I don't know everything or and that's that's fine too. I don't know, honestly, I don't know what the fuck I want. I just want to be safe. I think that's that's.

You just want to be safe.

I just want to be safe.

Hm hmm.

Men are terrifying. I'm really small five three They could I could anything could happen.

That's crazy that somebody asks you to go with them to the cabin in the woods.

Yeah, yeah, that was his opener. But like, God bless him.

Like if you had gotten to know okay, if you had gotten to know him, and maybe you'd met him in public a few like what how long would it take for you to be like, you know what, I'll go and I'll go to the cabin in the woods.

They would have never worked with me and him he's like too docile and sweet. Hmmm, I think I need like a little.

Ledge, yeah, a little bit of edge and has your has what you has what you're looking for in terms of like the personalities of the people that you're attracted to evolved as you've gotten older, as it stayed pretty much the same throughout your life.

They've evolved, absolutely, they've evolved. Like I've had a lot of really shit boyfriends, sorry guys, and then I've had, uh, you know, some some really really really great ones who have kind of and they've all taught me to uh look for the right things. And you know, in somewhere or another, I think I've just learned from from all of my relationships to some extent about what not to look for or what to avoid or what to seek.

Hmm. Did you did you date a lot like in high school and stuff?

Uh?

Yeah, no, actually no, No, I didn't date. I did the other thing, if you know what I mean.

Were you Were you popular in high school? I?

I don't know, I don't not really like. I I really like the the dance sector of my school because I went to a performing arts so I kind of stayed with all the like within the circle of whoever was a dancer?

Were you? Were you like sort of a theater I?

Yeah, I like generally speaking, Yeah, like I liked theater, but I think for the most part I wanted to dance. And yeah, the more theatery kids, I never really got to know them that much. But then I joined some some dance cruise in l A. Yeah, and I I battled around dance battles. Yeah, dude, but I don't want to talk about it.

It's so bad. Have you ever done? Would you ever rap? Battle? Somebody?

I used to want to do that, and nobody that like, nobody I knew, was into it, so it just never happened for me. So I just kept dancing.

Would you is that. Would you ever challenge somebody to a to a wrap or like show up at one of them, because I think every every city has like a scene of like underground and I feel like if you rolled up, yeah you could destroy people.

Yes, well yeah, I would love to do that, but yeah, I just don't know people that'd be down for that, you know, I know who would. I just don't like surround myself with with people very much. I'm a lone wolf.

Have you? Have you always been like that?

Yeah? Kind of, yeah, sort of not really, It's like comes and goes, Like right now, I'm very social, like I'm putting myself out there, but uh, yeah, I don't know, it comes and goes. I remember I'd like stay locked in my room every day and like make music and stuff on periscope. Remember periscope.

Periscopes was the precursor to talk or it was like the.

Streaming, Yeah it was Twitter streaming, yeah yeah. And I would go on there every single day and I would knock it out of the house. I would just like stay and make music and chow all day.

I've also been having like an interesting relationship with like isolation because you you'll like go I've like gone three years and then kind of like been like, oh, I've been isolating myself this entire time. Has that happened too, Yeah.

For sure. And I like need a change of scenery and need people noises and things like that.

What do you like? I asked this for genuine advice. What do you do when you feel like you're too isolated? How do you get yourself out of that? How do you how do you rejoin the community?

Uh? Oh, man, I just go on Discord. I just jump on Discord. We just hang out on Discord all day. Honestly, that's like that's I have a kind of a big friend group on Discord, and those are sort of my I just don't like see them because everybody's spread out throughout the United States. But it's just like just me and my friends on disc and that's kind of it.

One of the number one things that people call in here to talk about is how do you make friends as an adult?

Right? That's a great question.

Yeah, And it's really and I struggle with it. I used to do stand up and that made it really easy because everywhere, because you know, you go out to bars and this is always people around. But since I stopped doing that, it got so much harder. And I always, like, I guess I try to tell people, like, find an interest that you have and join a club that's like based on your hobby or something.

You ever, yeah, it's like you have to physically apply yourself to a community or something. But it's hard to even begin to fathom that when you've kind of gotten comfortable in such a you know, like a cozy or

I don't know, do you feel like you've been able to attract a lot of other people into your life, friends and whatnot by making beautiful things.

And I don't actually yes, actually yes, actually yes, I was gonna say no, yes, so in a funny way, so like what I was you gonna say? I So, my creative director is one of my closer friends to me. And then he had an assistant to him who's just like the funniest, like coolest girl girl. I'm like, so chill, such a vibe inspires me. But she she was just his assistant. She wasn't like being creative along with me. But then I started asking her like, hey, like where

You, but everyone's worst fear is that they introduced their friend to somebody and then they become closer with the.

Yeah, but I mean you know, yeah, me and you know, we all we all work really really great together and we still go out like all of us, and she's just like the funniest thing. And I even started kind of making music with her. She's not musical at all whatsoever, but she has a really good scream. She has like a beautiful, like like gut wrenching, like blood curdling scream. And I'm like, dude, can you please do that on a song for me? And so she's been, she's been

Is it a song that you put out or that.

It's not out yet? And I, uh, well, yeah, it's not out yet. I might start a punk band with her.

Really. So I listened to this interview you did on Apple Music and you were talking about like all these different kinds of you want to get into new genres and stuff, get into punk. Yeah, do you like Do you like to like mosh?

I like don't mosh, but I like the culture and I like the feeling. I like the emotion that surrounds it and the you know what it insights in me.

Do your favorite punk bands?

Yeah? I do. I really like the Chats Right now, just currently, I'm getting into Sonic Youth. My favorites though, probably idols who else.

Man.

I mean, yeah, Idols is like I think my number one.

I don't know a lot of the bands, but I like the jan Like do you know the Misfits, Yeah, yeah, yeah, I love the Misfits Classic. Yeah, I love like the Ramones, yeah yeah yeah. I want to go to more like local shows and just like fuck around and get punched in the face and stuff.

Yeah. Yeah, I don't, like I don't like pain like that. I understand that, but like I love to, like I'd love to just surround myself in that.

Do you do you ever make music that you're just like I'm literally I'm not even gonna put this out. I'm just gonna do it just.

To absolutely just to like hear what it would sound like if I did this thing. Yeah, I definitely do that. I do like experimental moments where I made I made a punk song on my own with like splice and like different programs and stuff that I just downloaded. I am learning how to like actually produce and not just useugh like default noises, which I've been doing for like since the beginning, and they don't ever come to anything.

It was cute. Did you really see you really seem like you're always I don't know if this is true, but you really seem like you're always having fun? Yeah, and I appreciate that.

Yeah, I am, I am, I am. I really like to have fun. I think it's important to have fun. I think it's important to chill.

Do you ever have you ever like, do you ever notice that you're not having fun and you stop?

Yeah? Sometimes? Yeah, yeah, you know what? Actually, the other day I found myself I so like most of my life things have been like messy in my room or my house, and I've always had something to do, something to organize, something to like get done. The other day, I was in my room. My room was perfectly clean. I'm like great at keeping my house in order, and I found myself sitting on my little day bed in my room and just like doing nothing. Like I was like,

I was gonna say, it sounds like you accidentally meditate I think I by accident meditated. Yeah. Yeah, how did it feel? Were you like this is gross? I don't like this.

Yeah, I like wanted a vice. I wanted to like go pour a fucking glass of wine or like smoke something. Yeah, zero nicotine.

No, it's very hard to sit and do nothing, and it doesn't even feel that productive because like people make it out to be like a like a big like productive thing to like meditate for an hour every day, But I don't. I don't get it, Like you could meditate for an hour every day for a year and you'd accomplish nothing.

Honestly, Like I could see myself meditating. Why was the mic so far? I see myself meditating and then being like I have to meditate. Tap, Now do you see what I'm saying?

Like it becomes a like like a.

I have to in order to feel sane and feel good, I've got to meditate, God forbid, Like I have stuff to do, like I can't but couldn't.

Okay, But the vices couldn't meditate and couldn't meditation theoretically, I guess this is the defense of it couldn't theoretically replace some of the other things that you like have to do that. I guess are like bad.

Yeah yeah, yeah, but it's like maybe I want to drink like during a thing that's happening where I can't sit down.

I bet meditating while drunk.

Yeah, could be probably already do that now I make it easier. Yeah. Maybe.

Like sometimes like when I drink, I don't feel like I know it's supposed to make you feel like social, but I like, you know when you're drunk and you go to.

The bathroom, Oh my god, yeah, it's.

Quiet and you just start alone with your thoughts and like in the toilet. Yeah, and it's like that's my favorite part.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And your face, you like feel your like face, it feels good and everything's warm. Yeah, yeah, totally.

I've gotten there's been a couple. Do you Are you a weed person? No?

I can't.

Like well, like when I smoke, pidle like get really in my head and think and stuff. And I've noticed that happens to me when I drink too, Like anything that deviates me from like normal sober mind like causes me to reflect on the normal sober mind. Do you have anything that does does that too puts you in a state of reflection?

You know what kind of Yeah, I think any stimulants, like like I last night, well not last night, a couple of nights ago. I like, don't do this, kids, I smoked a cigarette and like it was great, I really liked it. But then the next day I had

Like that into Celsius at all.

No, no, Like I just can't drink it, like I can't. So I have a really crazy Celsius story, please, I like got I like almost got into a beef because of Celsius the cell. It's not me like I I so I was singing a song and like doing the voice of somebody else with the song, like I filmed myself doing the song in a crazy voice, and it was like my really bad impression of that person, and

Like people are always doing that, looking for something, looking for something. Yeah yeah, maybe I don't know if that's the fault of the Celsius. Maybe that's the fault of of the people.

Yeah sure. But I also was just so I feel like with Celsius, you're high?

Are you ever?

If you read so high?

If you're taken I have, it does make I was prescribed it metic mm hm, and I took it and I was like, I'm high right now, I'm on drugs. I'm on math. But it makes me feel like optimistic.

Yeah. I think my experience was I was very robotic and responsible. But maybe it wasn't Adderall. Maybe it was something else.

Like I'm I've been, I've been. I've been prescribed like SSRIs every now and then and they I just give up because you're supposed to take them for like three weeks until you feel something. And I was like fuck this. And then it got adderall and I was like, oh, this is what I thought the SSRIs would be it's just an instant optimism and appreciation for life and shit. Yeah yeah, yeah, but it's it felt. I mean, I know those people who take it every day and that's

Yeah, why do I have to depend on this thing when I could, like, I know, I could find it in myself. I think that's a big part of like, just in general, just like you gotta you gotta find it in yourself.

I mean, I under like and if you really need it. People people will go against the argument by saying stuff like, well, if your leg is broken, you would take a pain killer, so why not do the same thing if your brain is broken? And so I respect, maybe I should give it, Maybe I should give it a try.

Yeah, yeah, but you know, hey, hey man, it's a wild industry.

Hey do you want to take a phone call?

Yeah?

I do.

Let's see what's going on. Hey, folks, it's Lyle. I'm here to tell you that tickets for my Therapy Gecko Live show are available right now at therapy geckotour dot com In several cities across the United States, or you can find them at the link in the episode description. If you've never been to one of my live shows before, they are extremely fun, unpredictable, wild evenings that involve a mix of group Gecko therapy sessions as well as some

What's up?

Hello?

Is this Carlos twenty from California?

Yes, this is Hi Carlos.

Hello Carlos, It says here that your ex recently came back into your life. You said it was your fault that you guys broke up, and now that she's back, you're wondering if you can maintain a friendship. Do you want to talk about about this in your own words?

Uh?

Yeah, I mean.

It was kind of like I had I had a lot of mental health issues going on to the point of like hospitalization and like other ship. And then on top of that, like I just wasn't being like the best boyfriend and I unblocked this girl who, like I guess i'd been not even I guess, but I've been

We end and then.

Recently, like I was just on tender and she's like she's still near my hometown, so like I swiped right, she swipes right as well, and then I don't know, we're just like talking to his friends again, and it's

You know, you feel like you want to break it off completely kind of.

Yeah, yeah, and like people have been telling me to do it, but like at the same time, like I think she's like I think she's a really great person, and you know, the prospect of having her in my life hypothetically sounds cool. I just don't know if it would work out, you know.

Yeah, man, Yeah, do.

You have any thoughts on this?

I have like a not a similar situation, but like somewhat I'm trying to trying to Yeah, I mean, I

I think like express.

All those things, even the.

Things that you think you wouldn't Okay, you know, you know sometimes it's like you want to dress them.

Sorry, wait, what the fuck? Oh okay, sorry, hold on, Carlo, Okay, wait, we're gonna get back in. We're gonna get back Oh wait, crap. I hope Carlos might have.

Left on like a pretty nice note though.

Yeah you know what, Oh you know what it is? I am Oh crap. Okay, wait, sorry, this is so annoying. I have to add funds to this call in studio thing. This is a terrible time, ma, man, but we have to put quarters in the machine. Okay, let's hope this all right. I have to log into my PayPal account.

Hell yeah, let's go. Okay, should I sing while you do that?

That would be awesome if you could do that.

Ah.

Sorry, I'm a little bit different when I'm like not on stage.

Oh yeah, yeah that was. Let's let's add even more funds just in case.

Yeah yeah yeah, yeah, yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah.

Okay, we are back. All right. Wait we might have gone. Wait where's Carlos?

Carlos? Can you hear me? He wouldn't be.

Okay, let's take a call from Joe. Hello, Hello, Hello, Hello, Hi, Hi Hi.

How are you baby?

I'm all right?

How are you?

Guys?

We're just chilling. We're just very very very much chilling at the moment.

Thank you for the singing.

Oh yeah, no problem. How are you? What's going on with you today?

Not much. I've been helping my mom, cream, cleaning my room, taking care of the dogs, you know, the.

Nice Joe, Uh is there? What did you want to talk about today? It's fine if there's nothing in particular, we could just vibe.

Yeah, oh well, I mean there's something I wanted to talk about. Also, your system is really nice. She sounded really pretty.

Uh uh Bri yeah, Bree rocks.

Yeah she was. She was really sweet. So I didn't want to talk about something. So my boyfriend I was like, we're about to go on one year next month, and I'm so sorry if I sound really shaky. I just my heart is taking her Hello. So, yeah, my boyfriend about to be one year. He lives like fifteen like minutes away by car. And for the longest time, I've been doing like a lot of long distance, like you know, I've been trying to make it work with other people.

I don't know.

I don't think I ever tell them, mostly like the bad things. You know. I don't know if they're just biased because of my last acts or what.

But like.

And I talked to him about it a lot, you know, and it's something that was like on my mind.

You know, are you are you? Are you enjoying this relationship? Is it making you feel happy and felicity?

I love it.

I haven't been this happy in a very long time. I'm being completely honest. I mean because like the last one, oh, were you trying to say something?

Oh no, no, no no, it was approving.

So i mean, like the last one was awful. I'm gonna give me a little context. I was. I went homeless for him. I went homeless for him. That's how much I loved him. He had nowhere to go, he was on drugs. He his mom threw him out because of all of it. She didn't want that around her kids and everything. So like I totally understand. I let him come here. He started stealing. My mom has diabetes, so he would take her needles and he would go through the bins in the back and like he has

He's like seems to care really really nice.

Yeah, he really cares. And but like, I mean, I know I can do things that might upset him, Like I never keep my fucking room clean, like ever, I have five dogs. It's a little hard to keep my little room clean. But I just like I would like to play with him sometimes, you know, like play video games like I like, but it's always like, oh, I can't because I'm with the boys, and I've played with his brother's friends. My personality is very let's stay out there.

So jo I just if I if I could error for just one second, I guess I want to ask you, like, if you could pin it to anything, what would you say would be like if there is anything? And and I guess I'm sensing that because you called there might be what would you say if if anything at all is like the main point of contention between you and this guy that maybe you wanted some perspective on if you had to narrow.

It down with you And why can't you come over, like when it's like an emotional thing, like he's like emotionally unavailable sometimes.

Like do you feel like he's not giving you is enough? Attention, that that that you that you want out of the relationship.

Sometimes yeah, genuinely, Like if I felt like in distress and I just feel like he wouldn't be here, you know, and then if I want to spend time with him and his friends, like it'll just never happen.

There's a lot of distance between you guys. Do you do you tell him that are you honest about that.

I have? And with the friend thing I've told him, Like, I just like, it's just it's just like your friends, Like, what's the worst thing that's going to happen, Like you think they're going to say something bad towards me because they aren't, let's say, pec his friends, they never have. They aren't very accepting of like people like me. So

Would I guess, I guess, I guess Joe. I would? I would I would say this, are you I mean to Joe? To Doe's point, were you being honest with him? And are you getting what you want out of uh, you know, is this expression.

Is there any progress being made when you guys speak about your your issues? Does is he willing to change things about his situation in order to make you happy or better the relationship or benefit it in any way?

He has made a lot of progress. Yeah, he was never out and somewhat out now. I think that's complete progress coming from like a very conservative family, very very conservative.

So he's willing to he's willing to make leaps for you.

Yeah, Okay, it's.

Great, that's good. I think that that's all that kind of matters, right when somebody is willing to work. I think that a relationship is a it's a two way street, and it's a lot about you know, working on you know, on uh being together and uh, most of the time it's not work because you love being together. But yeah, there should be a mutual respect of each other's feelings. And as long as he's meeting the needs that you have, then I think you know it's worth continuing.

Definitely, definitely, Joe, Is there is there anything else that you want to say to the people of the computer or anything at all that you want to mention about this before we go.

Something off topic? My friend wanted to wanted me to say something that doja cat, she said, ask her to Readmaster's suckered Punch. I don't know what that means, but.

Mastered punch.

They want me to remaster a song that I'm never gonna put out.

Oh yeah, that's it.

I just want to do that for my best friend.

But okay, Teller, I said, take it easy.

Thank you, Joe, Thank you so much.

I love you guys, and I love like your work. And you guys really make me laugh a lot.

Have a good night, dude, Thank you for that.

You too.

What was the song called again, sucker Punch said, an old one, Yeah, very old, maybe like four five years maybe even six years old.

Did you look at the past a lot or do you like to stay present? I just jen and I even musically.

Sometimes I revisit the past. Uh yeah, I leave a lot of things behind, though I know how to forget about things. I know how to just close things out. I'm very good at that. Yeah, but I don't know.

You know what do you not even music? Just in general? What are you the most excited about for the future?

What am I most excited about for the future? Uh?

Uh?

Expanding my brain musically and trying things that I'm not used.

To, and.

Uh, going to jazz clubs.

I've been trying to go to a I just moved to New York and I know they have like all these jazz clubs at some point.

Yeah, God, New York has really good bar culture and jazz culture and just art culture.

I think in general, do you, I'm like, do you? Is it hard for you to like go out and like bar hop and do all these things just because like of who you are? Uh?

Yeah, sometimes it is. Sometimes I'm very very paranoid. I am generally just very very very paranoid about stuff because of what I do. And but you know, I make it work. I think also just even if I wasn't famous, it would still suck sometimes.

Really, what do you think? Like how what do you well?

There?

There's like there's like creepy like men and like I I my like ass hangs out when I go to the club or I go to the bar, like I'm always wearing something very sexy, like I dress crazy. But you know, there's like stuff then people people react in certain ways and like you know, guys are just like drunk, Like drunk people are awful, you know. I just like, I, yeah, people react to the way that I am, men react to the way that I dress. That's fine, It's like

Time, even when you yourself are drunk.

Like drunk strangers, Like, I'm fine, but it's like strangers who are like trying to talk about their astrology signs and stuff. There's already happened. That just happened to me.

This conversation.

Some woman came up to our table and was like, you all for like, okay, to be fair, this was like very nice what she was saying and positive, but like, don't do this. She like came up to the table and was like, I.

Just want to let you guys know that you are also loved and you're also special and some when out there loves you and you're incredible.

I'm a cancer. So I just like I get like this and I just can't help myself, Like and I'm sitting there looking at her like like I don't exist. I'm I'm watching her like she's like a screen, like a thing on a screen. I can't believe that. Like some people just get to that point and it's it's you know whatever.

She sounded like she was on Molly.

Yeah, could have been, could have been some.

Mall like I do. I something like that would be hard for me because like I typically like if any stranger talks to me, like I have a lot of respects for people who are willing to approach strangers and talk to them. It's like, if someone ever does that to me, I want to like reward it by by being like, oh, yes, of course and yeah, but but that does that does sound extremely intense.

I think I'm quite closed off. So I think when that stuff happens, it's just like stop it.

You know, are you into astrology at all?

Or I'm really like I'm I get it, Like I know, I understand the signs. I understand because my mom's really really into it, so I just can deep dive into like different signs and stuff. But I don't. I don't like it.

I have Okay, here's my take on astrology. I'm curious when you think about this, I don't I think there's like I don't like the idea that somebody's like, oh, I am this sign, and so they go to a website and they read like, because you're the sign, you are like this, like because you're a Gemini, you get emotional easy or something. And then they take that and then it just becomes like a self fulfilling prophecy. They have to they have.

To live by it, and so it.

Causes all this like unnecessary negative personality.

Some people. You can you can abuse astrology. You can you can abuse like pseudo science absolutely, just like anything that is kind of a vice. Uh you know, it's yeah, man, I I like talking about it. And I actually have a friend who's really good at readings, like doing readings. He's like fantastic. You like give him your your date of birth and then like your time, your time of birth and like all this like specific information about you, like where you were born and blah blah blah, and

It.

There's a time in my life that's happening right now for there's a couple signs that are going through it right now. But it's it's almost like the planets are asking you, do you really want this? This is what you asked for? Here it is? Do you actually want this? Is this really the life that you want to lead

Of that, I'm curious And you might not have an answer or have an answer that you want to share, but when faced with the planets are giving you this is this what you really really wanted? Like when he said that to you, did you have an answer?

Like if somebody asked me, is this what you really want? What's my answer to that?

Yeah?

No, probably not really This is probably not what I want. Really, it's what I wanted. Really, it's what I used to want. It's what I think I needed to be in a safe place. I needed to get the fuck out of

But like I mean, that's the thing is if if you were to be uh beholden to it, you know, it doesn't matter if it was like the most marketable, successful thing ever, you'd just be fucking miserable.

Yeah exactly. I'd be doing the same thing every single day. Yeah, And I cannot do that. I just can't.

And like, and like I said, I think the cool I think the coolest thing about you is that you always seem like you're having fun.

Yeah. Fuck it rock and roll. That's honestly, that's what I.

Fuck it, rock and roll, fuck it rock and roll.

Fuck it, rock and roll. So I've Yeah, I've been having a lot of fun creatively. I've been painting a lot more. I'm like, yeah, it's nice.

Yeah, I see you're painting a I see you on Instagram all the time painting a wall.

No, I painted, and people said, I look like an old grandma with fat ankles.

You want to take another call?

Yeah, that's who we got, fat ankle.

Hello.

I heard myself say, fat ankles.

Hello.

How are you?

I'm good.

How are you hanging in there? What's uh? What's going on, Lauren? How's life?

Uh not, it's pretty good.

How's y'all's life going?

Skip? Nick Man. We're trying to talk about things, We're trying to solve problems.

Eddie.

What's that.

Eddie?

Hi?

Hi Eddie. It says here that you have an intense fear of death.

Oh no, yes, yes, it is. It's it's really oh god, it's intends to to a certain degree. For example, I you know, fear of death is an every one. I don't know if y'all feel the same way I do, But like for me, it's just been like every little thing I do is just oh, this is so cool in the moment, But then I I for some reason, I just flash to, oh what if I can't do this anymore? And like so insole amount of time, and but I don't know if I if I'm making any sense.

Like, yeah, go ahead, what's your no.

I think it's fine, don't I continue?

But I'm just validating, all right, than I appreciate it, but like I don't know, I shit, but like I'm trying to formulate words.

So I A good example is like I sit in bed, let's say three in the morning, four in the morning, rolls around, and first thought that comes to mind is me dying, and then like, oh shit, like it settles in it's going to happen something. Of course, I'm far away from it right now, by the way, I'm like barely bad at her nineteen, Like I'm far away from

Is it of old age, is it of natural causes? Or is it of an immediate thing that's like happening in the room, Or is it a you just think of do you think of like something falling on you, for example, or like is it where does that the fear stem from?

So it just comes So I there is a one of the fears that this fear comes from. My grandma basically got into dementia and like dying really really young, like I say really really because like she died in her fifties, and like.

It runs.

It's a thing that into the family, like her sister's like has it really really bad? And I'm afraid of me getting that. I'm afraid more of my mom getting it because you know, she's like the she's like the direct descendant of my grandma and stuff like. That's but that's where that fear sprawled out of. Like first it

What do I do about that? Hit fucked?

My sister probably will outlive us, like and then and then I just like yeah, and I want to say and I want to say that it started like it probably started for then in twenty twenty because it's like just a shit year, like twenty twenty. I was convinced for the longest time made twenty fifth, Made twenty fifth exactly we were gonna hit by an asteroid and we're all gonna die. Come make in twenty fifth no one died and just the thought of dying, like Okay, yay,

I'm gonna die still something constantly.

Yeah, it's Penny. And I've been trying to, like I've been trying to get into therapy and stuff. I've been trying to, you know, like make appointments and stuff to talk with someone about it. But like I'll be honest with y'all, I'm in college right now, twenty thousand dollars in debt freshman year. I don't got time for anything, like and if I do got time for anything, I just I use what I can to sleep because God

Yeah, you're working to support yourself in order to support yourself. You're you're working to support to support yourself enough to afford therapy and to even begin to Yeah, it's it's the battle of the monetary and the physical that health the body, Like what you need to do to take care of yourself.

Yeah.

Yeah, I don't know how you guys feel, but I think the cool thing about dying is that it happens. It's like this unifying thing that happens to everyone, Like nobody's above it. You know, it would be way worse. You know what's way worse than dying living forever. That would be horrible.

It would It would fucking suck.

It would suck so bad.

It would be so shit. Imagine that.

Think about think, yeah, I.

I forever, you know, as a little as a little kid like and it's gonna sound cliche as fuck, but as a little kid, like, you know, one thinks they're gonna live forever. One thinks nothing's gonna kill him, like, believe me, Like that thought of like immortality as a kid was like, oh like nothing, like I'm invincible and stuff. Now like as a you know, maturing adult, like I

That's what you should do, is you should if you you see, you should replace this fear with the fear of living forever, and then you can satiate your new fear with your old one, which is, oh, thank god, I'm gonna die, and it becomes a meditative good thing. Yeah, are you afraid of at all? How do you feel about your mortality to.

An extent, Yeah, because I know that, like I couldn't defend myself in a specific situation.

I'm talking mainly about like the inevitability, not likevitability. Yeah, not like, oh I'm going to get murdered.

No, I don't think that I am. I think I just yeah, yeah, I don't think I am.

I hope you don't die anytime soon.

I oh, yeah, I'm I don't think you.

I don't think you will.

Saying that that is kind of saying that's kind of like jinxing it a little bit.

Yeah, I don't know.

That would suck if you just died.

I think I'm half of a forty ounce in me, So don't maybe take what I say with a grain of salt.

Eddie, how do you before we go, how do you want to die? Like if you could pick anything?

Okay, well, I've thought there has been a few ways of me dying. I if I don't die in my sleep, I want to just be killed fat, like quickly, like so I quick and painless as painless as can be, because I don't I don't want to feel shit when I die. Get that, and you know, or let's you know, let's see in what course this country takes, Like you know,

I think you should put across, Like I think you should play some Tetris. Man, I think you need something.

That just gets your digits.

Yeah, just something that fully just gets you out of you. But you're thinking too much. Yeah, you think way too much.

To stimulate, to just keep stimulating your brain with just like shit, like play something, play, play a game, play some games.

Video games really are a great way to forget about death. Thank you for calling Eddie. Any final words, Uh, yeah, you're awesome.

Those are You're fucking amazing. And thank you the show. I'm glad I got to talk with Thanks, ma'am.

Take care Eddie. You there really is like that's all I'm looking for, man, that's all I want. That's all. That's all I want is just to be just to be in the moment, to not be with my fucking thoughts. Because when you're depressed, you're thinking about the past and possible the future, when you're anxious, thinking about the future, But when you're just playing Tetris and getting drunk, you're right, you're there, you know you don't you don't. You're not

Yeah, I think I've accepted it.

How would you if somebody if you got diagnosed with like a terminal thing and it was like you have a week would be like I'd be.

Like, oh, let me prep my brain for this. I would be like, yeah, I mean fuck it, Like what am I gonna do? Let me like do something. I Like, I'd be like, what's a fun thing I can do right now? Like, hey, this sucks, but like what's a what's a cool cool thing to get into while this sucks?

A death hobby?

Yeah, death rally hobby, death rally hobby?

Like I'm trying to think of something. Well, I assume a death rally hobby would be something dangerous? Would it? Oh my god?

It will uh breaking bad?

Kind of yeah? No, selling math just as a hobby.

Yeah no, not for me. But you know I think I would just like, uh yeah I would. I would just be creative as I can in that in that time?

Are you tis? The concept of legacy? Is that a thing that you think about or do you think about?

Like not at all?

It's good, Not at all, that's good.

Like I don't want kids ever?

Really no never?

Yeah no really because the thing about life is when you have kids, like you're gonna destroy them, like you're gonna ship Yeah, you're gonna fuck them up, like there's you don't have a choice. So I just I don't feel like fucking anybody up.

I don't know, dude, it's a lot of responsibility.

Yeah, no judgment towards people who have kids. It's just like that. Don't want to do that.

Do you ever fantasize about domesticated life? Just like, like, are you like I want a ranch in Wyoming?

Oh?

Yeah, I want like dogs?

Yeah yeah, hard to fuck up dogs?

Yeah? I want dogs. I want to be responsible enough to take care of dogs. I like animals, Like, if I'm gonna have kids, they're just gonna be like hairy animals. Four legged, quadrut pedal. What's the four four legs on, four legs, quadruped quadrupedal, quadrupedal Q Yeah, quadrupedal puppies is what I would have.

Is there a breed of dog that you're particularly interested in?

I really like Scottie dogs, and I like anything that just can't kill me. So I had before I readopted my dog to my one of my best friends, I had a h what's his name or sorry, what is it? What is it called? It's called the American Bully. But I don't think that he was like pure bred. I think he had like a mixture of a couple of things. I don't know what the deal was over there with that. They didn't have really the right information. I don't think about his uh yeah, his mixture, but he was He's

Are you a cat person?

I am a cat person. I have four cats.

You have four cats.

I have four cats. I have two babies, one sixteen year old.

They come with you, and yet, uh no.

They don't, because cats get stressed out and they like to be in one spot forever. They like routine. So I wouldn't do that to my babies. But I sometimes I do wish that I could bring them with me.

Yeah, you know, I've always said that, Like the thing about kids is it's really the only thing, really, the only anything could happen to you, and you could figure out a way to deal with it except like grievous injury, death, going to prison, or having children. It's like the four things that like you can't you can't.

Hustle your way out of Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I mean you can, like it is fround up. I mean you can abandon your child, but that's that's frowned upon. That's not cool. Those are like the four permanent things. Anything else that you can quit your job, you can get divorced, you can do you have pets. I have a dog, but it's not my dog. It's like my family's dog. My dog. Wait, earlier, you said you had two questions for me.

Oh, I do have two questions for you.

What were your two questions?

Is it is it still gay? If you come? And hold on?

Wait before I want to think? Is is it still gay? Wouldn't wouldn't wouldn't it wouldn't it be? Is it still gay if you don't come? Because if you come, that would make it more gay?

Is it?

Oh?

Sorry?

Is it gay if you don't come? Is it still gay? If you don't come?

Is it still wait?

Are you?

Are you?

And I assume the context is gay sex?

I wrote it correctly, and I don't remember how I wrote it.

The question is is it gay? Is it still gay to have gay sex if you don't come?

Yeah?

Is it gay to have gay sex? If you don't come?

Do you want to know what the other question was?

Yes?

Why isn't your face red if you're the mouth, If it's the mouth, like your face is inside of the mouth, like you should be like it should be red or like black or something.

It's probably gay.

Yeah, it's probably gay.

Let's take another call. Hello, how any Oh? I like it? Howdy? How's it going, Carlos? What's up?

I'm doing well. I have a lot going on, but I am trying to wonder how to attract a dominant woman into my life.

I can help you with that. Oh yeah, okay, how old are you?

I'm thirty eight?

Uh?

Fuck?

Maybe I can't help.

You with that.

Because he's OK.

You went through it. Yeah, I don't know. I don't know what older women are doing that that that like in your bracket.

Vibes, that would be like a like at a cougar for you at this point, would be like a woman in her six Well.

I also don't know what type, what what? What's your age preference?

I tried and I don't know, like mid twenties to mid forties.

I guess okay, cool?

Uh damn, how would you attract Okay, how to attract? How to attract a dominant woman?

Where wear one of those rainbow hats with a spinner on it?

Yeah, you could do that. You could also you could do that.

Damn a big lollipop.

I'm like really struggling trying to karaoke.

I don't know where do you Where do you think dominant women hang out?

Yeah?

Where do dominant women hang out?

What about those acts throwing places?

You could know? Because that's oh, maybe at a shooting range, at an axe throwing range.

Go to.

You're you're in Texas, right, I I am go to a gun range.

Oh, I'm gonna dominant women.

Dominant women want to go to a place where they feel damn it. And what does a dominant woman want? So I'm trying. I'm trying to start from from from the bottom here.

I don't know.

I'm not sure I know where that is. Like where go to like a like a bar that has a pool table in it. They like leaning up against pool tables and like playing. I don't know, honestly, man, I'm he might, he might be a while, might be a better help to you.

Are you do you consider do you consider yourself? Are you a docile boy? I guess, I guess. I guess. A dominant woman, I assume if you want a dominant woman, you're a submissive man. Or I assume dominant women would be Would a dominant woman typically be attracted to a more even more dominant man, or to a submissive man.

People are too complex for me to even like answer that do you use do you use dating apps?

I try to, but like I'm already with the fact that around here people are just not my type generally.

Yeah, I get that.

There are a lot of people here that like they hold values that I don't. And then like, I'm also like you where I don't really want kids and there are a lot of people that really want to start families and it's not for me.

Maybe a creative woman. I think creative women they paint their own they paint their own reality in some way, they kind of have control over over. They have a they have a vision, and I think you have to have a vision in order to be dominant or somewhat in control. Right, So somebody with a vision creatively.

I was thinking that too, because I'm I'm trying to become a better artist, and I one of the jokes online is that you know, when people make art, they just this is their barely disguised fetish. And it's like, yes, I want to draw things that you know, turn me on and turn others on. Yeah, so maybe I should be the one to be drawing that as well.

Yeah, are you do you draw like giant tesses?

Yeah? Yeah, what do you draw?

No, it's usually like bondage stuff and like muzzles and leeches.

See your art, your art directly mirrors what you are seeking, quite literally to some extent. Okay, honestly, man, you might want to just be involved in a community that's into that sort of thing, right, Like you just you know, like poke around and see who's see who's into what, and uh, there's there's a lot of people. There's a lot of people that are that are into that.

Brother, why don't you get on Uh once you get on fet life, you know, like get a life.

I bet to go to fulsome have you gone to what's false? Fulsome street fair?

Dude? I bet bet life in Texas is fucking crazy. Yeah, I bet this. I bet there's a scene of all kinds of people who would love to tie you up and piss in your mouth that you can find on fat life. He's not kidding.

Yeah, try fet life.

I would trust it.

I would trust try that. Try poke around on the poke around the internet a little bit. Look at some look at some uh some forums.

They go on the forums, you know, is that what you're looking for? Somebody to piss in your mouth?

No? No, not really, No.

So specific.

I just want to.

I mean, I mean he's looking if you're looking for someone to I feel like, isn't that the ultimate form of I mean, like domination is somebody peeing in your mouth?

Yeah? Sure, But that's so specific because that's just water sports. That's not even that's water sports. That's like that, that's like a category.

I've never heard heard it referred to water.

It's literally called water sports, and it's a it's a specific category.

Saying it like it's in the Olympics.

I mean, it fucking kind of is with how how uh, with how intense.

It can be Internet.

No, I don't. I don't think he likes to gargle. I think he's more of like a I think you here more of like a cerebral a cerebral fucker.

A cerebral fucker.

Yeah, he's more an intellectual fucker.

Yes, uh woom me with your mind.

I think that it's part of I think it's like, do you do you feel you feel safe with someone who's dominant because you feel like there's somebody who is in control and and you you feel like you can lean on that a little bit and you can trust, Like you want to trust someone.

I like the idea of being being vulnerable with another person, Like I really want that. I've just been alone for a while now.

And yeah yeah, so okay, so this is not a sexual thing specifically. This is just you want someone to you want someone that you can trust to be vulnerable.

Well, a lot of a lot of that BDSM stuff is like rooted in like a like a core saying that people people have been through different things in their life where they need to feel like they can open up to somebody or they can trust somebody, and like, for instance, like if you tie someone up, you're putting all of your it's like a trust fall, like you're just putting your You're just saying like hey.

Like.

Yeah, that's literally it. You're just like saying I trust you and and and and That's a huge part of relationships is trusting people. Some people have relationships where they don't trust each other, but there's nothing more ultimate than like being like being in trust with someone.

That's a good way to look at it. It's import somebody who you can trust enough to tie.

You up, yeah, because because once you're tied up, they could like put a cigarette on out on your nipple and you're like ow and then or they could they could they could throw you in a cold pool or something that you wouldn't like, but they won't do that because because they love because they love you, yeah, and you trust them not to do those things. Some people like cigarettes being done out on their nipples.

I kind of want to get on fet life now, dude, make one. I'll make one. I run into Carlos, run wild Bill.

Yeah.

What would be your thing?

Would be my thing?

It would be would it be being a furry? Look at cosplay?

Dude? All right, So a lot of people ask me, They're like, are you are? Am I a furrey? And if the defenit okay, if a furry is somebody, well, technically i'd be a scaley.

You're such a fucking scaley.

If a furry is merely somebody who is a human being that regularly dresses as an animal, I do fit that description. Yes, yeah, you.

Know, there's nothing wrong with you.

He's a coss player. He's a he's a Yeah, he's a he's a furry.

Well you don't know what. Say that again, you have sex while you're in the first suit.

Oh, what about it?

That's what they do. They do that in the suit. By the way, no way that that lasts longer than five minutes.

What having sex in a car in a first suit, you probably sweat your fucking balls off.

Physically able, you have to be, not physically like just advanced. You have to be to be able to do something like that with like the gloves and like.

It's like doing push ups with with like a weight on your bed.

You're looking out of a mouth that has like a black mesh on it, probably and you can't see anything.

Yeah, it just sounds absurd.

Imagine I'm imagining it as the guy though, it's kind of like two glory holes having sex with each other.

Oh wow, you're just you're right, because you're fully blocked off. You're like, you're just two walls. Yeah yeah, yeah, that are that are going at each other. Right. I've also heard that those costumes, like the real ones are like I mean people's people will drop ten geez.

Oh yeah, they're so expensive. Oh my god, they're so expensive.

Are you? Are you a fur suit guy?

No? I consider myself a hurry, but I don't I don't have the money for the first seat.

Oh you are a furry, but you don't have the suit, right? Oh okay, okay.

What uh so? How do you how like you you're a phrase in you Like it's it's like mentally you're an animal or how does that work for you? No?

I just I just like furry characters nice, and I.

Like another identity, sorry, like you like to take on another identity other than yourself. It's the fantasy aspect of it like.

That that that kind of goes along with like the BDSM stuff. It's like it's just role play with another person.

Yeah. Yeah, you're you're building a scenario. Mm hmm, you're building a world. That's fun.

Yeah, you should get like a what would the firstsona be of a dominant woman? Like a like a rhino.

She'd be like a I don't know if i'd fuck a rhino. I don't know if she'd be a rhy I mean maybe she'd be a rhino. Fuck it, she'll be a rhino. But I mean whatever, dude, maybe like a like a horse or something. No, because you ride a horse. A horse is a submissive creature sometimes, but it's also a creature that runs wild, so to some extent, I don't know. They can go both ways.

Uh yeah, I don't know, Grant, do you feel like this was helpful for you?

A little bit?

That's not good enough.

That's good enough for me.

I'll start a seed life account, I guess.

Please do.

All right?

Have a good night, Grant you to wait? I don't know, like why the fun have been your name is Carlos. Why I've been calling you Grant?

Maybe there's no called Grant whatever?

By Carlos, by Carlos, love.

You both, bye, good luck, dude.

I have to piss.

Go piss, really, yeah, go piss. I'll hang out. I'll talk to the chat. How is your bathroom break? Do you feel relieved?

It was cool? I went barefoot and I stepped on something wet? Do you think I have athletes foot.

Now you might have something well, I don't even know what athletes foot is.

I definitely have something well, athletes foot is. Athlete's foot is more just like when like your feet are sweat it's like you got to be an athlete, but not really. It's like you're you like are wearing two tight of shoes.

And you know, have you ever heard of foot in mouth disease?

No, that sounds hot? What is that?

I don't I was asking because that's something I've just heard of. I assume it's a disease that you get when you put your feet in your mouth. And then athlete's foot in mouth is the disease you get when you step in something wet in the bathroom and then you put your feet in your mouth.

Okay, okay, so I could if I wanted to, I could have foot in mouth syndrome.

Do you think people ever make themselves sick for fun?

Me?

Really? Yeah, that's gotta be someone's thing.

Part of me likes to be sick. Absolutely. Do you ever get sick and you feel like.

Yeah, you're a little you're a little high. Yeah, yeah, you get a.

Little like you get a fever, like when you get the flu. Yeah, do you ever Well.

It's a great excuse to not fucking do anything right, and.

You are.

But does it ever feel good? Like you know, when you're in bed and you're like out of body and you're like and you're.

Like floating, there's a little bit of like restract of oxygen to the brain. Yeah, it does feel good. Yeah.

Yeah.

Are you a night quill person?

No, I don't take any of that stuff. I think I'm scared of it. I think I'm scared of Nike will or scared of or maybe I'm not scared of well, night quill is always a drink thing, if you always drink it, Okay, No, I yeah, I think I just avoid anything that's like a liquid medicine. So I just don't.

Not to try to put you on a new vice. But fucking Nike quill is so awesome. I've never done I've never done Lean before, but I have I would probably love it.

Is that like baby lean.

I Lean is just if you're done night quill is baby lean. Lean is just ni quill And like I haven't but Lean is just nicquil.

Right, Uh, yes, it's like very strong. That's that's big boy. Night Quill and then night Quill is Baby.

Lean and they put Jolly Ranchers in it.

Yeah, and then they put your Allie Rancher's in it, and then they rot their teeth and then they make it They're embarrassing. Sorry guys, Sorry, I'm sorry. Some people like really really like that shit and they can't even help themselves, and so I understand that. So that's you know, no no, no judgment, but like, but.

I don't think that. Do you think? Are you afraid the Lean community is gonna.

I think that the Lean community might come after me.

I think r slash Lean is gonna via via.

X dot com. I think that the Lean community is gonna be really upset about that one.

Well, my message to Lean community if anyone wants to hook me up with some free linen, I would love to try it. Is there any like what's left for you to try that you haven't tried yet?

Why isn't your face red?

I'm never gonna answer that question.

Why would you do that? Why would you not answer that question?

M some things in life.

You love that you that you painted your face screen and you're not following the norms of how geckos should anatomically add up.

I mean a normal gecko.

You're like a You're like a you're like a fuck it whatever. Moving on.

What's up?

So what was that? What were you gonna ask me?

Oh, if there's anything you haven't tried yet that you want to try in.

General, anything that in oh, like.

Drugs, it could the question the question was spurred by a by a drug thing, but it does not have to be a drug.

Okay, okay, something that I want to try. I want to try uh uh oh, I want to go to a raith.

You've never been to a raise.

I've never been to a raid.

I would have thought you, like.

I seem like that, don't Yeah, yeah, no, I haven't. I really want to go to a rave. I want to be sweaty. I think I would have never done that in the past, just because my my I would like wear wigs and stuff and they there'd be like glue on my head and like it was gross. And like to be in a sweaty environment.

I feel like you could put together like a sick rave outfit.

Oh my god, yeah, yeah, it would be so chill. First of all, it would be I have two I have a couple of different outfits. My one would be like some regular like windbreaker pants with like the stripes down the side, and like a little like a tiny little T shirt. I'd put fake nipples under so that it looked like I'm my nipples are erect the whole night and it's hot, and I got glitter on my

I feel like you, would you ever would you ever like are you? I know you're like experimented different genres we have? Would you ever do like a DJ set? Would you like play a rave?

I don't know, And I honestly I think that, like my focus isn't very great for something like that. I think I'd get distracted quite easily. I can see myself having too much fun and then like ruining the set.

I actually I put on a rave uh for New Year's this year. It was called the it was called the Reptile Rave. No way, it's called the Reptile Rave. And we got a real We got a DJ and I stood on stage and just did this.

Did I hear about this? Were there like, were there like folks there?

Uh, there was like one hundred. There's no it was. It wasn't like a I don't think I would be if you had heard of this, I would be extremely surprised. Oh okay, no is the reptile rave. Niche folks, niche folks, Okay, people, some people shut up in crocodile costumes. I just wanted to do something different. I don't even like MD, I don't even I don't even like a m Yeah. Yeah, I just thought it'd be fun.

That's dope. I love themed parties too.

Would you ever go? You should go to a Shrek Rave? That's like taken over the days.

That's what I heard about. That mixed up with what you were saying. Yeah, really, Shrek Rave? What's what does that entail? Does everyone look like Shrek?

I think people dress up as characters from Shrek? Okay, and then the DJ plays I assume I've never been, but I assume the DJ would play music that like samples shrack. I want to go, I want to go, I want to go. I want to get to. Two of my homies goes to the Three Little Pigs.

What the fuck.

That's amazing there's also a SpongeBob rave.

See now I would do that. I would do that, but I'm all a Shrek. I get the whole Shrek thing. I love that. Like the producers of Shrek did not see that coming.

Probably I'm surprised they haven't gotten see indeed, what is that desist?

Oh?

Yeah, Like I don't know how that works? Yeah, yeah, are you a SpongeBob.

I'm a big sponger and I sponge frequently. I love I love SpongeBob so much. It's sad because I think and no offense to Like, I know it's not easy to make a show. This is going to seem mean, but like it. It's been bad since after season three, I think, Yeah, there's only been three good seasons of SpongeBob in my opinion. I think something happened obviously. Yeah, but I do really love SpongeBob.

Yeah.

Well, if so, if you were going to go to the SpongeBob break, what character would.

You I would be? Well, obviously I'd be Sandy because I just want to be sexy.

I I don't understand the implication that you can't be sexy. Is I just as like squid word or mister crabs, thank you. Patrick. I think you could put. You could put, you could pull it, you could I could be.

A sexy Patrick. I could be a sexy Patrick. But I honestly Sandy because I love wearing a little tiny bra and then put and then.

Wow, you know what she's She's like kind of naked in that hole.

She's like totally like naked, and like she's like, yeah, she's got like body and everything.

Sandy. Not really, she's a squirrel.

I shouldn't say that we.

Need Carlos's opinion.

We do. We need Carlos's opinion on Sandy Cheeks.

Have you have you ever done MDMA?

I have?

Do you like it? Yeah, it's the bit I want to do it. Last time I did it was at Coachella two years ago. I haven't done it since.

Yeah, I stop doing all of that stuff way back when. But I've had a great experience on it, and I really didn't need to do it more than more than once or twice. I think I did it twice. I think I felt pretty satisfied after the second time. I think it's just like intense and I have so much like I get like overstimulated. I have a lot of energy and like I just don't even need it. I don't even need it. I think I like naturally am just like people like really genuinely think that I do.

Like coke.

People think I'm like a cokehead.

Why do you think people think that?

I Maybe because like I'm like I have like corny moments about me, Like I can be quite corny and like outspoken or something, or like I'm loud or something like I can come off very angry sometimes and like on live and shit like that. I think that's a lot of what it is. And I'm I'm just I'm just a goofy. I'm just a goofy guy.

I mean, it's just it's like a it's all a character.

Yeah. I think sometimes when I'm a goofy babe, people get, you know, they get uncomfortable.

Are you like, are you or where you ever like a shrooms acid?

I did? I did my share of shrooms. I did my acid. I quit cigarettes on acid.

I heard it. I forget what interview, but I heard you tell a story about how you quit nicotine through hypnosis.

Yeah, and I quit. I quit nicotine through hypnosis recently nine months ago. Eight months ago, I.

Heard that, and I was like, fuck, I gotta check out.

Yeah, and I have some interesting uh is it prognosis? I don't know words very very much, but I uh, I quit cigarettes. I walked in, I walked into that hypnosuccession, walked out of that building and didn't smoke one cigarette or have one nicotine vape for nine months.

Really, what you can and can you explain what went on in your brain?

I just was like, fuck, I want a cigarette so bad. And then I was like, I don't smoke cigarettes, but I'm not a smoker. I don't smoke. I don't I don't want a cigarette. I don't smoke, but I do want a cigarette, but I don't smoke. So that's what. There's this internal dialogue over and over and over every single day, and in my mind I would scream. Inside my head, I would go, I'm not like, I'm not a smoker.

I don't smoke.

I'm a non smoker. I don't smoke. I really like, I wouldn't say I don't want to smoke, but I would say I'm a non smoker and I don't smoke. And I would say it in my head over and over every time I thought about cigarettes.

You make it an identity.

Yeah, yeah, sort of, or just like I just think about it occupies my mind that I don't smoke cigarettes.

I just don't. I'm trying to get on that wave with a I've been addicted to candy. That's like my vice is like candy and like sugar, and like that's the problem is that it's it. See the fact that it's cute is a problem because it's like, uh, well it's bad.

Well do you like do you brush your teeth and everything like that?

Sometimes and this is embarrassing to say as an adult, but I'll say it. Sometimes I get too lazy and I don't brush at night. I brush it every morning.

You know what. I don't brush at night either. I never do. I don't brush at night. Ever, sometimes I do sometimes I like, yeah, can't.

All right? So like you fu all right, you go out, you play a fucking arena show. You're you throw your entire life and your throw it all out on the stage. Yeah you're exhausted. Yeah, you have nothing left to give. Yeah, you're not gonna brush your fucking teeth after that? No?

Are you kidding me? I'm not gonna brush my teeth after a relaxing night of Fortnite, I'm not going to even do it.

Then, do you brush your teeth at all?

No?

Yes?

Yeah?

Why did I just say, though, God fucking damn it.

Do you that the teeth?

Look at my teeth. You have a nice teeth there, gorgeous.

Yeah yeah, but do you brush them twice?

And I brush my so so my thing with my teeth is one of my exes used to brush their teeth for like ten minutes straight, NonStop, and I felt like he had like a moral high ground over me. And so I started brushing my teeth for a very long time. And then I brushed my tongue for like five minutes every single day.

Is a little it's it's weird.

I brush the absolute fucking life out of my tongue. I get everything off of that thing because I'm terrified of bad breath. I even mentioned it when you were doing my makeup earlier.

You did.

Yeah, you didn't have, really, you swear to God.

No.

Cool.

Here's the thing I wouldn't tell you if you did.

Why am I scary?

No?

I don't think you're scary, but you didn't.

Okay, okay, Well that's what that's fucked up. Though, you should tell me that I have might have stinky breath.

I don't remember you. I don't think you did. Do you feel like you have bad breath right now?

Well, my mouth did taste questionable earlier. And I'm not sure.

Why did you eat anything weird?

No, I did, well, I had wine and lemonade. But that's not weird.

It's not weird at all. Yeah, you brush your teeth, like during the wait you had to see your ex like he was like posturing about how he brushed this to you.

No, like he would, I mean like he would just be He would like do things while he's brushing his teeth, and he would keep his mouth closed so it wasn't like a mess. And he he would just like walk around the house with the toothbrush in his mouth and just like sit with it and like lay down with it in bed with the toothbrush in his mouth. And so I would look at that and go, fuck, I've

Not ten.

Ten is ten is insane.

But you know, all right, let's get into this flossing.

I don't do that. And I want me to tell you something right now. I went to the dentist the other day for a cleaning and they said, do you floss? And I went no, And I was like all like, you know, shy about it and guilty and then and she was like, you're good, You're fine.

You don't have to like you're the dentist told you that. My one. It's so I never had a dentist in my fucking life.

Tomy, not my dentist, but the what's the other the person that helps the.

Dentist, dental assistant.

Dental assistant or dentist.

Fuck it wait, okay, here's that If the dental assistant says you're gonna be fine and then the dentist says you got a flaws.

No, the dentist didn't even say that. He didn't even like like say, hey, make sure you folost when you go, like they'd like they were just like just brush your teeth and like get in there and like once it's smooth, you're good.

I don't know if you feel like that every time I go to a dentist, even a doctor. I feel like I'm like talking to the assistance. The assistants doing ninety seven percent of the work, and the doctor or the dentist comes in, looks at.

The teesser quick and just dip yeah, yeah, yeah.

Fuck is that ship? Yeah, you're the dentist. Shouldn't you be doing most of it?

I think that the dentists in a in a way is like a They're like a surgeon almost like they're like doing the real the real deal, like getting in there and taking those what is that called the root canal, taking those things out your teeth and redoing your teeth and opening them up and splasting them with crazy.

Shit you ever? Have you ever? I think they're called tooth tunes. Do you know what I'm talking about?

Yeah?

I remember the things that like they would uh it would play like a Justin Bieber.

Song like very y two K, very early, very much, and.

It would like, uh, play for two because you're you're apparently supposed to brush your teeth for two whole minutes. Now that another thing I'll admit, And I brush my teeth every day at least once I don't do it. Do you know how long two minutes is it's pretty long.

It's not long. You have to What you do is you take so you need like a laptop or something, and then you just like put on music and then you just like daydream while you tooth, while you brush your teeth.

You daydream. What do you dream about when you brush your teeth? Is this? I'm thinking face or I don't know if I want to say it face men.

My voice cracked when I said that.

That's that's really sweet. Men you dream about men when you brush your teeth? Yeah, sometimes that's really sweet. Sometimes that's really nice. That would be this if somebody how much.

They annoy me, how much they want, how much they annoy me?

Why do men annoy you?

I don't know, It's like, why why they annoy anyone? I love men? I'm sorry, I'm just kidding. Woo on. What were you going to say? What were you going to say?

What was I going to say? I was going to say, if somebody told me they were thinking about me while brushing their teeth, I would be flattered. Yeah, But if they were, if somebody told me they were rushing their teeth, think about how annoying I was.

Yeah. You think about life and you think about what you want. When you brush your teeth, it's like right before you fall asleep, So you lay in bed and you think about a thing, and then you slowly fall asleep. It's like the same with brushing your teeth.

You do it for a full two minutes.

What do you do in the shower?

What do I do in the shower?

Yeah, like when you shower, like, oh, you know what I do in the shit?

I don't have a shower right now where I can do this, But normally I sit down. Really I every time I can, I will sit down in the shower and I'll let the water pour over me and it'll just be like a it's very meditative. Do you not sit down in the shower?

I don't because it's different when there's like balls, nothing can get into your balls because there's no like hole there, like if you I don't have balls, So like if I sit if.

You're afraid, if you sit down in the shower.

I'm getting athletes pussy.

You're getting athletes pussy. So I can't. I can't sit on the Can you get a vaginal infection from sitting down?

Absolutely absolutely?

In a tub?

In a tub?

Yeah? Well, I mean like if you're at home, right and you have a trusted tub, but that you know does not have any vagina back.

Well, that's different. That's different. If it's a tub. Some showers have like a bench in it, and something about that puts me off. I don't like the vibe of, like, seat in the shower.

You're afraid you're going to catch something.

I'd rather sit down on the ground, which would be the tub. I'd rather be like this because then you see I'm angled in such a way.

You're you're like cradling yourself.

Right, And that's me in the shower.

I wonder sometimes if it's a like is that like a depressed person thing to do to sit down in the shower?

You think that it is, But really it's just like quite a nice feeling to like be. It's almost like there's rain. Yeah, it feels rain like it's like a simulation of rain. Yeah, it's sad, but it's cool. It's fine.

Do you ever you're a pee in the shower?

Absolutely all the time. I pass on my legs every day.

Yeah, me too.

Yeah. Do you ever feel guilty? Like why am I doing this? This is a bad thing to do?

I should I feel guilty if I like, like, if I'm staying at a friend's house and I piss in the shower, I feel guilty.

Really yeah, I don't. Does that say something about me?

It?

Does that mean that I'm like a bad person?

I mean, if I had a friend, probably if I like any of my anyone who anyone who wants to can piss in my shower. I don't care.

Yeah, that's why I wouldn't care if somebody peed in my shower.

I had a guy call into the show once who said that. He he said, I pee in the shower, but I know everyone pees in the shower, but my thing is I only pee in the shower. Like like he'll like if he's like at someone's house, he holds it no no, no, no, Like like like if he's at someone's house and he's like, a hold on, I have to go to the bathroom. He goes to the bathroom, A piece in the shower.

Would do that.

I don't have no idea.

He definitely should be calling you about that issue, because that's that's an issue.

I don't know what I told him, but uh, yeah, I think I've started peeing the shower every time I take a shower.

Yeah, you should.

But then but then I'll be in the shower and then I sit down in the shower and I'm like, wait a minute, I'm sitting you pissed?

Then you sit down immediately after? Or do you wait for the yellow to disappear?

I wait for the yellow to disappear?

Okay?

Sometimes yeah, I'm gonna get like I'm gonna get out. Sometimes I'm gonna get athletes butthole athletes balls.

You can't get infection in your booty ho it's a booty hole. You haven't seen that movie?

Like, No, what movie is that?

It's with Tiffany Hattish and uh and Jada Pinkett Smith.

Is that there's no I feel like there's no science to them.

Is it called girl? It's called Ladies Having Fun. I don't know what it's called, but the movie is Ladies having Fun.

You can get all kinds of infections in your butthole.

No, you can't google it right now? No, you can't google. Can you get an infection in your asshole?

All right, I'm gonna actually do that. Can you get an infection in your asshole? Anal yeast infections are a common fungal inaction caused by a yeast called I should.

Have been had that at one point in my life. I have not gotten that.

Sorry to Tiffany Hattish.

Intense itching sensation around your anu is called oh paritis Annie.

But don't be alarmed. Treatments and they have anti fungal creams, ointments, suppositories, and you can prevent anal yeast infect this. I don't know why they wrote this. This is redundant. They said you can prevent anal yeast infections by keeping your purreianal area clean and dry, which probably includes not sitting and piss Yeah.

Probably, but but but I'm not a doctor. But that's bullshit. You cannot get an infection in your asshole. I don't care what Google says.

Hey, you want to take a phone call?

Yeah?

Yeah, ooh is any is anything standing out to you? Yeah?

I kind of like Marco Marco. Let's talk to Marco Marco Marco.

Yes, Hi, what's that baby?

Oh?

Not not my not much. I actually just uh, I just got done closing the store of my words.

So all right, what's up?

Man?

Has life? Oh?

Not too bad? Pretty good so far? Pretty chill? You know a vibean here, you know, chilling? Depressed.

Yeah, depressed.

I'm just kidious no, my mom al right, just a lot of stuff happening home life. But you know, things are going pretty okay so far.

Though, can we Well, I guess I'll let you say it in your own words. What is it that you wanted to to to talk about with us today, Marco?

Okay, so I was talking to I actually want to talk about it, Uh, something with one of my best friends I have done, uh, one of my best friends. I still talk to him to this day, but he actually, uh, we actually did stuff together, you know, like you know right now, I'm a I'm a I'm a I'm a straight man. You know, I'm a straight young man, and uh I have a girlfriend now, but I have a best friend that you know, me and him did stuff together.

A we were what was it.

We were we were in a row. We were driving in his car one time and then out of nowhere. Uh, he was just kind of the crouch again and he was like, oh, your balls are so full, Oh my god, oh you're he was like, and I was just like, I kind of was just like, oh, okay, like normally I don't normally even dances like that. But but but I.

Cool, man, you didn't want to hear the end of that story.

If he really wanted to discuss that issue, he would have not described how full his balls were.

He wasn't describing how full his balls, or he was describing somebody else describing how full.

Well, right, no, but like whatever, still like he would have. I don't know. Maybe I'm more of like a reserved person sometimes, but I think he would have maybe gone about that differently if he was being dead ass serious.

Do you think he was wait, do you like I think he was like? Do you I think he was playing it up? Or you think he was a straight line?

I think he was fucking around or he was getting off on like telling us this publicly?

Really you think? So?

Yeah, a little bit, I don't.

I want to respectfully disagree. I don't think he was doing that.

That's fine, that's fine.

But but you do you have I've I've relinquished upon you ultimate skipping power, dude.

I don't I don't know, I don't know something about it, just being like yeah. And then he grabbed my nuts and he was like, fuck, your balls are so something about that?

Does anything else anything else around here? Look? Look, look, look excited.

Yeah, let me see.

Hit.

Wait mm hmmm.

Uhh I kind of up up up, kind.

Kind of cryan.

Yeah, okay, cool, Let's talk to Ryan. Hello, Hello, Hi Ryan, Hello, what's up? Brian? Would you want to talk about today?

What's not?

Wow?

I can't believe I'm on Wow, what's up? I guess, I told the screener. Uh yeah, yeah, I'm really nervous right now.

If you don't feel comfortable doing it, don't, don't worry about it. Oh take your time.

So oh yeah, so I guess, yeah, I get. I wanted to talk about like a couple of years ago, my dad died. I don't know why, but so, and I've been like doing really well since. And it's just interesting, Like I think about like a lot of people I know are like some people I know who were in they're like when of their parents passed away, they kind of like went into like a like a dark thing. But I'm like it's happened to me, like it's happened in my life now, and I'm like, I kind of

M hmm was it?

And is there anything that you wanted to talk about regarding because I I it said that, pull that up something about your cousins or.

Or I think the wrong one. Yeah, this is this is what he said.

Oh I see, I see Okay, okay, okay, okay, sorry my my my eyesight is kind of fucked.

Well.

I guess I'll ask you this, Ryan, why do you feel like you're chilling so hard? Why do you feel like you're feeling feeling good? There's nothing wrong with feeling good.

I don't think do you feel do you feel bad for feeling good?

Yeah, that's a good question.

I've thought about that a little bit. Like Yeah, but like I guess, like I said, like, I've been around some people and they're like, you know, like their dad passed away and like he was like someone I used

Sorry, I was just I was saying that there's a lot of feeling that come with with something that uh kind of that big you know, so I think, yeah, you know, I haven't had that hasn't happened to me, but I yeah, I mean it's it's it's valid and and I think you should always strive to feel better and and just push forward. I think that that's kind

So there's really yeah, yeah, yeah, like I don't know, it's it's obviously been you know, I felt I felt sad and have thought about it, you.

Know since of course you know, yeah, but like, you know, it's always been like when I do, when I do, it's like pretty positive. Like I'm just thinking about like you know, i'm like late like snipering in on the good stuff, you know, and I'm like, yeah, you know he was good.

Did you guys have did you guys have a good relationship?

Yeah, I'd say I'd say, like through it it was pretty good. There was there was also like some not good stuff, but like and I think that kind of goes in to like kind of how I've felt since he hasn't been around to it's really interesting, like you know, there's like less tension. Yeah, but also you know I love him. I loved him, you know, to death, and you know he was cool as fuck.

I think that it sounds like you have the tools to deal with the situation like this in a high stress In a high stress situation, your friend may not have known how to deal with this, and not everybody knows how to deal with this when this happens. It's very it's different with everyone. And I think you were just able to you you had some some sort of mechanism that allowed you to push through and you're and that's that's Yeah, i'd say a blessing.

Yeah it's sam. Yeah, I do have that.

I feel like I feel like i've I.

Don't know, and also yeah, I don't know, just witnessing a lot of stuff and then I'm like, Okay, this might happen to me at some point, and.

Then it doesn't. I'm like, okay, so.

Kind of prepared, you know, pretty prepared somehow, but like, yeah, yeah, you're right. And and and you know, the person I knew that where that happened, and I was like, you know, pretty close to them in their life. It was, you know, we were all we were like twenty and I'm you know, that was ten years ago now, yeah, like in that area. So I don't know, it makes sense. And I you know,

It's just weird.

But and I don't I'm not sensing I'm not even sensing that you do. But I don't. I don't think you should feel guilty about that.

Yeah, there's an there's an uneasiness I think about. Yeah, there's an uneasiness or an unsureness about it, like do I act this way? Do I do this? And do should I feel this way? But I think that that bottom line, it's about it's about overcoming any sort of that kind of that kind of feeling. And it's and that it's also okay to have those feelings as long as they're balanced to you know what I mean to

Yeah, yeah, you're doing good?

You know.

Yeah, that's that's that's the great part about it.

You know.

Oh yeah, how you feeling right now? Will I got h Hell?

Yeah, I'm sound pretty good, mister geto.

Hell yeah, what are you doing right now? Where are you?

I'm just I'm just doing my apartment, just chilling. I'm just sitting on my couch. I just said the remainder of some popcorn. It was this cinnamon cinnamon bunon popcorn.

Hell, yeah, that sounds awesome.

H that's about it.

You beat pop chips, pop corners, hop chips, pop corners.

Pop corner, pop corn corner. Yeah the place. Yeah, that is literally what I have right now.

Yeah, that's with the cinnamon and they taste like okay, put put that on vanilla ice cream?

Oh my god, is this.

From a store? Is just like a place that you go to?

No, no, no, it's a brand popcorn pop Corners.

Oh it's different from pop chips. Do you know what I used to do.

I used to take the I used to take them and crush them up, the cinnamon ones and put them in a bowl with protein shake, the chocolate fair Life and literally cinnamon toast crunch. But like the health vibe, the health versions. Yeah, it's amazing. You can't stop though, that's the problem.

Popcorn.

Put that. Put that bitch in a bowl with some with some uh, with some protein shake. But it has to be chocolate.

What could be? You could try vanilla if you're feeling.

I don't know. I don't trust that crazy, I don't trust that.

I have I have cooked.

I have cookies and cream ice cream in my freezer right now.

Hit that.

Okay, kind of what kind of cookies and cream ice cream is? It? Was it Ben and Jerry's.

I think it's just like, uh, you know, like Kroger Proger brand. Oh yeah, don't you know the good the good cheap kind.

You know nice.

That's that's crazy. You literally pinpointed the fucking popcorn I was eating.

That's that's great, Yeah, because that's like the only cinnamon popcorn that's worth it.

I don't know why. In my head, I thought you were.

A little white buckets like the icing.

I thought you had like a bucket. I thought you had a bucket with like cheddar, caramel, cinnamon.

Yeah.

No, there's this is like a it's like a bag.

There's some snacks that I want to put you onto. I don't know the name of them.

How would you?

Can you discribe their tiny little little like patty circular like rice.

Crack, Quaker Quaker oats, fucking rice cake.

No, it's it's birthday cake flavored, birthday cake like funfetti flavored, like drizzled over with like little rainbow sprinkles on top of a rice cake.

That sounds yeah.

Oh yeah, gosh darn it.

I need to go to the fucking grocery store.

And get me some snack.

That's right, you know what best snack.

I'm feeling like everything is going to be all right.

Yeah, me too, You.

I think so too?

Oh yeah, Well, is there is there anything else you want to say to the people of the computer before we go.

Those your gek.

Gek and I love you.

I love you both.

This is crazy. I'm talking to y'all.

Everybody.

I love you, I love you.

Take care about about being by.

Ryan Boom, by the being so you.

How you doing good?

This is so relaxing, probably because I've had a half of a fucking a forty. Oh I haven't even had half of the forty Honestly, I said that earlier and I did not. I was like, not even close.

To that, does you? Kat? Thank you very very very much for coming on the show.

Thank you, thanks for hanging out.

Sincerely. I really appreciate you coming on. Is there anything that you would like to a plug or talk about you wise, and then be just say in general and final parting thoughts feeling sentiments.

Yeah, if anyone out there feels like they're struggling with with figuring out maybe who they are or with their creativity in some form. Just fucking just do whatever you want and stop listening to other people unless you really trust their opinion, and like I mean really really really really trust their opinion and you know that they're dope. Other than that, yeah, love yourself and that's it. Oh what else do I have?

Oh?

I have my European leg of my tour coming up. I'm gonna be going to all the Peans, just a lot of Peans. There's a lot of places on to London, going to London. I'm not going to Germany, unfortunately, I am not going to Ireland. Oh am I going to Ireland? I don't know. I don't know a lot of things off the top of my head when it comes to like, you know, the plan of Yeah, things changed around actually too.

O what's in the deluxe scarlet?

It's called it's S two. Uh Claude Fralo is the name of the The Deluxe, but it's it's just like an eight song, seven song something like that.

Roughly, Okay, I'm gonna this might sound stupid. It's Claude Fralo, the guy from Yes, Yeah, I did you name it after Claude Fralo.

Because he is like A is he a tyrant? He's just like a He's like a. I feel like it connects to the story of Scarlet to some in some way. And if you look up his personality traits and like who he is and his story, you'll understand kind of the whole the whole connection. There's like a control aspect, like he just abuses his power and his control and is just like dogmatic and like is just a total cunt. And all Esmurelda wanted to do was just be creative

Check Out that song hell Fi, you know the one he goes fire hell Fire?

Yes, yeah, oh my god, Yeah, that's a great song.

Oh.

You're also headlining Coachella soon.

I am. I'm headlining Code.

Oh.

I think we're good. I thought the fire alarm.

Was Yeah, you you summoned a fire by singing that I did?

He did?

Yeah, I have Coachella. I'm headlining Coachella and that's gonna be fun times. Get your booties down there, let's do some dancing and uh yeah, you'll enjoy it. I think I.

Hope dog a Cat. You're a legend with a voice of a generation. I'm a big fan. Thank you, appreciate you coming on.

Never big goes on the line, making your phone calls every night, never goes to on his Eide's teaching you cloud the end of your life, but he's not ready.

An expert