All from Joe.
Hello. Yeah, what's your name, sir?
My name is Joe.
How's it going, Joe?
Dude, it's going pretty good. It's nice to talk to you, finally.
Nice to talk to you too.
Man.
I'm uh, I'm in a chill mood. I think everything's gonna be okay.
But who knows that?
Yeah, I mean who knows? I think, Uh, I don't know. I think I got to just start accepting life for whatever it is.
Yeah.
Maybe I don't know. Maybe I don't know. I don't know.
I don't know how much I I fucking won't shut up about this on the on the show, and it just in my own brain. But I don't know how much of life is how much of life is improving external circumstances versus accepting them.
I think it's combination of both.
But sure, yeah, no, I mean that's kind of going off for what I want to talk to you about a little bit today.
Yeah.
Like, I've just had a few few circumstances in life that kind of kind of hit me early on and now it's just, you know, I'm trying to deal with them. But I don't know, man, I feel like they kind of get me down sometimes and cards to get out of that depression, you know what I mean?
Okay, what? Yeah? What are they? So?
Dude? I was big into the gym a few years ago, and honestly I had I had a few injuries that I never took care of and they devolved into something pretty bad. And then I don't know, over time it got it got worse and worse. Eventually I had surgery, you know, I got some you know, I got some racist and back issues now. So lifting has kind of never been the same since then, and that was like a big thing that kind of made my life really important.
Man.
Now it's pretty it's pretty hard to find something that brings me the same meaning, you know what I mean?
Hmm, Okay, So you can't lift anymore because of these injuries.
It's not that I can't, It's just that it's it's a little, uh, I have some limitations, that makes sense.
Yeah? Sure? How old are you?
I am twenty two?
And you said that lifting you're having a hard time finding something that gives you the same amount of meaning.
Yeah, bro, it's like that. That really brought me a lot of meaning back because I used to work at a gym and I still do some personal training, but that was really a big thing for me in my teens, Like in high school I used to do a lot of lifting to track and stuff like that. And then I finally got a job at the gym when I was like eighteen, so that was exciting for me. And
then yeah, I was just really into it. And then these injuries came up, and like, you know, I knew in my head that you know, they were going on, but I hadn't really gotten them checked out, and like a timely mannered they kind of developed into something worse. So over time it just got, you know, worse, and now it's years later, I'm having a hard time just coping with that, if that makes sense.
Yeah, so why do you think you can't find anything else that gives you meaning?
I feel like that was a good way for me to kind of deal with the mental stuff I had going on. So I kind of, you know, I told you I have a lot of anxiety that I was just kind of born with. Yeah, so I sort of I sort of struggle with that, and you know, the lifting was a way for me to deal with that. And then also just like my insecurities, dude, honestly, like, I just you know, I've never been like fully, I
don't know. There there were some things that I was insecure about in high school, you know, my height, ship like that, and then I would always lift and I'd be like, you know, this is this is the way that's going to make me feel better. So that that was kind of a big thing for me.
So the meaning you get when you say meaning, I mean, do you really just mean like because me, I don't know if is meaning the words you mean because do you just mean like it makes you feel better or physically mentally?
I would think I would say that, yeah, you know if that If that doesn't make sense, I guess I'll kind of put it like this. It was it was more so the whole, the whole unity in it too, because that was also a little bit into a little bit into bodybuilding. Yeah, so it was more like I had these visions of like, Okay, I'm gonna I'm gonna do this bodybuilding thing, and I'm constantly working towards this, uh this one goal, and that would sort of become
that sort of become my motivation. Every day. I'd be like, Okay, you know, I'm gonna get this, uh this amount of meals in I'm gonna, you know, go hit the gym for this amount of time, hit hit these uh these muscle groups, and it was it was going pretty well, and I enjoyed it a lot. And you know, like I said, I had, I was dealing with some other
stuff like anxiety, some insecurities. And then you know that was even around the time, like I wasn't doing so well in school, so I'd be like, Okay, you know, I'm not gonna I'm not gonna worry about school because I got this other thing going on in the in the gym, and that's I guess that sort of uh that was very satisfying for me, you know what I mean, I don't know, just.
I guess.
Does that make sense when I say meaning now?
Uh? Yes, yeah.
So one of the things I like to think about a lot, and I think about this with my own life, is like there's kind of these uh this there's like desires that you have as a person, sure, and then there's vessels to fulfill those desires. Not to get uh actually this is not I was gonna say, not to get spiritual, but this is like actually very not spiritual at all. This is like this is like this is like logistical, empirical, actionable ship.
So so you.
Want like, yeah, you want community, You want to be around other people.
You want to have a fucking computer all the time.
You want to be around to the people you want to It sounds to me and and like like like you know, clarify, but it sounds like bodybuilding. It was something you were good at, so you felt competent. There was other people involved in it, so you had a community. I mean, those two things alone make can make a person very happy. And the bad news is that your body is basically made a fucking tissue paper and can get fucked up very easily, and it's unfortunate that that's what happened.
But the good news is that.
Of the things that exist in the I mean, you're only twenty two, you got a good fifty eight more years left to live. Maybe we'll see, but yeah, but there's so infinite many things that I'm sure you could find out in the universe that you can get good at to give you a sense of competence, and that you can do with other people to give you a
sense of community. So just like I know it gets hard and I've been there, before where you get really invested in a hobby or a thing, or a career or just anything, and then you're like, oh, I don't know if you know what.
You don't want to go back down.
You don't want to climb down the mountain because you're so invested in. However much time you put into a thing feels like if you tried to do it again, it would take forever but the best you but it's to sit and kind of dwell and be like, oh, no, I'm fucked because I can't do this one specific thing out of the infinite things that will fulfill my desire for community and feeling like I'm worth a shit.
Is not a good idea because there's so many.
It's like it's like the it's the abundance versus scarcity scarcity. People always get mad at me when I say that word, this abundance versus scarcity mindset, You know what I mean? So so what else? So is there anything else that you can do? Like the wheelchair basketball or what's going on?
Luckily it's not at that point yet. I mean, I'm pretty like, I'm pretty fine. To me, I might have over exaggerated a little bit. It's just you know, kind of thinking about from where I was a few years ago to where I am now. You know, there are just times when I feel like, Okay, maybe I could be doing I could be at a little bit of a better position. Sure, you know if these injuries never happened, like kind of going off.
But that stuff. But you can't.
But you can't, you I'm I'm you can't think about that that way. Yeah, you can't, because life just throws fucking wrenches at you and.
You just have to, Uh, I don't.
I just think you have to kinda take take it all in, like you were not, like like nothing was.
Ever going to be perfect. Maybe maybe maybe for some people.
It is, but not but for most people nothing, nothing was ever going to be perfect the whole time.
Yeah, man, And you know, just to I mean kind of go off of that. I was thinking more about how just for for a long time, I think I've I've built this kind of almost body, this morphia sort
of thing going on. We're now like when I'm when I'm in the gym or i'm training someone, I see, you know, I see these other people and I know it's not a good, good habit to be looking at other people or comparing, but you know, sometimes it's hard to be like, Okay, you know, what if what if this never happened and you know, had to had I've been able to achieve you know what this guy's got
going on, And I know that that's not healthy. But I'm just being honest with you here that that's Those are the thoughts that kind of come into my mind. And yeah, I'm kind of slowly working my way out of that, you know, years and years course of kind of body body image problems.
Yeah, Joe, you already know this, but you you, you, and there are natural thoughts that we all have. We look at we're always comparing ourselves to other people because there's no there's no real like fucking guidebook to anything, So you're just always looking at other people. I do this too, and I have to remind myself you can't fucking do that, you know. Yeah, you can't compare, You really can't.
You really can't compare. Not only you really can't.
Not only you not only can you not compare yourself to other people. That's gonna fuck you, but you're gonna really fuck yourself if you compare yourself to other potential versions of yourself were events difference, Like if you sit around and you're like, you're like, oh, my life could have been so much different if this happens, or if this didn't happen, or if I didn't make this mistake.
But it's just just no reason to do that.
If you you know, if you're gonna compare yourself to anyone, compare yourself to the version of yourself that decided that none of that shit matter, then you and that you were gonna go off and make a good life for yourself anyway, if you're gonna compare yourself to anyone, compare yourself to that guy, because that's that's the guy that that you could still be.
You know. Yeah, man, you know, trying to remind myself, you know, we're only in a competition with ourselves. So I mean it's hard when like it's writing in your face sometimes, but it's just it's just every day Bail trying to kind of reinforce that, Yeah, that makes a lot of sense.
No, I'm always uh.
I mean also just I know, I know you're not with the whole comparing yourself to other people thing.
It's a strong like.
Unhappy, it's a strong sense of unhappiness and that. But there's also there's another version of it where like, uh, you can compare yourself to people who are where you can you compare yourself to people who are like less fortunate than you, and you're like, well, at least I'm not, you know, Like I think for a while, I was a lot of times in my life where I was kind of self conscious about my height, you know, and I'm like, yeah.
I don't know if you heard me, but that's that's another thing that I was kind of almost compensating forward with this living thing because I'm I'm barely five seven, Like I'm trying to I'm trying to, you know, deal with that is also you know, something that I grew up with, you know, in high school and.
With all these Yeah, i mean I'm barely five seven too, but it's always but you know how much worse it could have been for us.
It could have been so much.
Worse for a fucking that fucking angry Bagel guy on.
YouTube, like we could have in the Angry Bagel on YouTube, like you really can't do you you know what, you know what it is, and I actually I'm so glad that you called in to talk about this because I just came, really, I came to an epiphany about.
This that I'm happy to share.
Is like, I'm really I'm beginning to really feel like comparing yourself to other people, you're trying to cherry pick life. You're trying to like take everything that's good about everyone else's life and everything that ever could have been good about your life and remove everything that's bad and cherry pick yourself this perfect life made up.
Of only the things that are good about about other people's lives and you. And you just can't do that.
You can only have you can only have somebody else's good things. When you're like, when you're comparing yourself to another person, you can only have their good things if you take all the bad things that happened to them too. Like when you're watching a guy in the gym and you're like, oh, this guy's in good shape. I wish I could be in as good shape as him. You're not disc you're discounting all how all everything in that guy's life the horrible.
You know what I mean?
You have that comes in a package deal. You can't just take all the good things out of everything you see and use it to make perfect life that doesn't exist.
So you just gotta take you just.
Gotta kind of I guess, I guess take stock of whatever is good in your own life and just be like, thank god, I have this little more. Thank God I'm five six and I'm not you know, the to whatever how the bagel guy's heights.
Yeah, you know, thank god I have.
I have fucking have have something. You know, if you sit around and you're like, I have this thing, but it's not enough. I need this guy's thing, and I need I need this guy's thing, but I don't want this guy's thing. This guy's has this thing that I don't want.
But I.
Yeah, you can't, but I don't want you know, his horrible childhood or whatever the fuck you know you can't do you just can't do that. And I and by the way, I'm like giving, I'm giving a whole spiel right now, but I forget this all the time, and I'm I'm like, oh.
Yeah, man, it's human. It's human nature to to feel, you know, Like you said, these stuffs are natural, and I think we're all dealing with them, to be honest, and nobody's perfect, so we're never gonna be able to be in a situation where we see someone who's you know, bigger, better, whatever the case might be, and just automatically, you know, just remind ourselves that we, you know, we shouldn't be
doing that. I think it takes a lot of time, and you know, honestly, talking to you, it's been you know, awesome getting that that insight and you know, just continuing to practice that stuff is super important.
There's also.
Well I also think about it a lot in my own self because I think a lot of the times I wish that, uh, like you, like you wish you didn't make certain you just wish you made different decisions in your own life, or you wish something. You just wish that certain things didn't happen a certain.
Way, and you can't. But you also made good decisions.
With your life, you know, and you think about that.
You can't. You can't. You can't cherry pick this ship.
It's just your life and the way you lived it, and every single thing about you up until this point in your life is what it is, and it's major who you are, and you're grateful. You got to fucking ever be anything and go from there, and go from there.
Yeah, don't don't.
Dwell, don't dwell that you that you that your legs are broken. I mean that probably sucks. By the way, I just see I'm I'm yeah, yeah, I mean that.
Probably my legs aren't broken. It's not that bad.
But okay, because I was talking to you, I was talking to and I was kind of like I was, I was thinking about my life, and I was like, well, at least my legs aren't broken like this guy's legs.
Yeah, yeah, No, No, I'm kind of over exaggerating it. It's more of just like I have like little pains here and there from like hold injuries. It's nothing that's like immobilizing or anything like that. But I get exactly what you're saying.
Yeah, well, well, thanks for letting me, Thanks for letting me go on this fucking.
Gary Vaynerchuk's speech to you, this folk.
Man, Thank you THO was really insightful and I'm glad I finally got to, you know, talk to you that that shit was awesome.
What's your name again?
My name is Joe. Joe.
Is there anything else you want to say to the people of the people who are folding their laundry while they're listening to this.
Yes, you know, continue to have a positive outlook on life and keep keep being you. I think he said a best while. I appreciate it.
Man.
Hey, thanks Man. Take take to Joe, take care of Joe. See you later.
Man, you two while talk you Man.
Yeah, I don't know. I'm just thinking about this stuff a lot. I've been thinking about this stuff a lot because I've been thinking about.
My own personal goals in life, and I've decided that my main goal for twenty twenty five, I'm gonna d I'm gonna finish out this year. I'm not gonna put a pressure to start this year. But my main goal for twenty twenty five is to not be going insane all the time.
It's my main goal.
Because I feel like I'm really grateful for the way that my life is panned out so far. I've gotten to meet so many people, I've got to do so many really cool, incredible things. I really think if I died tomorrow, I did it. You know, I did good. So now I'm just like and I'd like to continue living the rest of my life creating things and.
Doing stuff. But if I have to go, if I have to go, insane to do it, you know what I mean? Then I don't know if it's worth it. I'm gonna keep rambling.
This is fun because like h like, anxiety can be kind of can be like a motivator, can motivate you to do things, can motivate and put kind of a fire under your ass to accomplish stuff. And and it also makes you afraid of losing of losing things too, And so that kind of motivates you to do things. And and you kind of think if you kind of think to yourself like, oh, I need this anxiety that's going insane. I need it to be and to do anything to be like uh, to accomplish things in my life.
And to a certain degree, I think that is a little true.
I think that is a little true.
But also at a certain point, the anxiety just makes your At a certain point, you have to you have to have a little meeting with your you're the parts of your brain that are constantly on edge and going insane, and go, Okay, are we is this really? Will life be better without this? Can we leave this behind and still uh you still live the kind of life we want to live. I'm pretty that's about that's, by the way, that's a hypothesis.
I'm not saying.
It's very by the way, it's very well possible that you should be anxious, don't I'm not. I'm not here to tell anyone that they it's possible. It's my it's very possible that you should be anxious if your life sucks.
I think if your life, if life sucks and.
You're anxious that your life sucks, and that anxiety propels you to like this idea that you hate yourself into submission, and that causes you to do things.
Uh.
I mean, it's worked for me so far. But that's all.
Like, that's the only playbook I have ah to offer. But I think I'm gonna try to try a new playbook.
So I don't know. I don't know. I don't know if you should hate yourself or not. That's real. I'm not being facetious. I'm not. I'm not I'm not. I'm not a I'm not a doctor, I'm not a psychologist.
I'm gonna, I'm gonna. I'm just a guy diarrhea in into a microphone about whether or not it is good to hate yourself. I hope this whole ramt made sense. It made a lot of sense to me. Uh okay, let's take another call.
All from Chris.
How you doing, buddy, What's up?
What's going on? Man?
Dude?
You know the first thing that I wanted to say is how weird it is that I want to talk to a gecko. I'm here. I think I must have called a hundred times.
It is weird. It is where I find it very I went.
So I had a live show in uh DC, like a couple of years ago, and my best friend Ryan came and he saw that there was like and he came and he saw, you know, everyone like kind of I meet everyone after the shows and uh you know, there's a big line of people that I was talking to, and after I spoke to all of them, I was talking to Ryan and he was like, he was like, you know.
No offense, but I think it's kind of I was.
I was looking at that line and I was like, all these people want to talk to Lyle.
So that's not I feel too.
No, not center o, but do That's like the main reason I listened to you. I think you're very introspective. I love your take on things, and you know, I had a question, man, so I got some stuff that I want to talk about, but I have a question, and I want to know, like, do you believe in God?
Like?
I know it's kind of personal, but I'm just curious, and I'm not.
Like you could you could have asked. You could have asked some much more personal questions. Wait is it you say you had a couple of questions? This is the first of a couple questions.
No, I had something else. I had some other stuff I want to talk about. Okay to me, but I was just curious.
No, I don't, but I don't.
Uh do I believe in God?
Do I believe in God? I don't believe like not. I don't think I believe.
In God in any way that has currently been expressed. I don't know if I like, like all the like like the classic religions like Christianity. I don't think any of that stuff is real or Judaism or anything.
I don't. I don't believe in like a God, like a guy. Like I don't think it's a guy.
Uh, I hear you, dude, I understand.
I think I think but I but I think that.
Uh, I think that like human consciousness is this is like an insane, magical, god like kind of fucking unexplainable thing like our own consciousness is is uh, it's like magical, it's it's not of uh, it's like not realistic in a way. So I would believe that there's something that's uh. I would believe that consciousness is a spectrum and that we are not necessarily at the furthest right hand side of the spectrum, and that there there could be something more conscious than us.
Okay, you know, but I don't. I don't think there's like a I don't. I don't know if I believe in Jesus.
I get you, dude, I totally get where you're coming from.
Man, you sound like sound like you sound like you're you believe in God. That's why you're That's the response of someone.
So I was raised in a Christian househo, and I've gone through my bouts, and you know, I don't. I still don't fully know if I believe. But what I do is uh, you know, I I whenever I get a second man, I try to thank God for uh, you know, like struggles and ship. But not only because I believe in God, but more so because it keeps me humble and it keeps me thinking myself. But I just I just recently started doing that, and I feel like it's made me a little bit happier of a person.
So whether or not God is real doesn't necessarily matter. I'm not like a Bible reader and ship, but you know, I think keeps me humble. Man, I like it.
Well, let me tell you this.
I pray, dude.
I pray. I well, because here's the thing.
I there's I don't necessarily believe that there's like an external force that makes the things of the universe the way that they are. But I think all all the time. Uh, and it's like all the time. I I'll like, I'll like, I got through airport security yesterday and and it was not very busy, and so while I was waiting for my bag to come out, I just I just started praying. Like I put my hands together and I looked up and I was just like, please, you know, please, and
thank you. That's what there's I just say. I just look I clasp my hands and I look up to this guy. I don't know who I'm talking to, but I just say like please, fucking just please, please, and fucking thank you. Oh my god, thank you, Jesus Christ, thank you, oh my God, because I feel very because I'm very because it's like, uh, you know, amways anxious, and so it's like please let everything It's like, please let everything be okay, and thank you for every morsel
of everything in my life that's okay. Right now, I don't know who to ask please to and I don't know who to say thank you to, so I just clap clasp my hands.
And look up.
That's crazy, dude. You sound like you're explaining what I'm thinking right now. I feel the same way, Dude. I
totally agree with you. And so that was kind of one of those things that I think about because I don't necessarily know what I believe, but I think I believe in something, dude, and just saying thank you, and like, you know, looking at things a different way, like instead of like looking at everything that makes me mad is like an issue, you know, I look at it is like maybe something out there is just trying to show it's a better way, dude, Like, well, I'm sure there's
a better way to go about it. And getting all mad and like saying, somebody, but why don't you feel Sometimes.
Well, I don't my main thing is like I really don't know why I am me and like another person is another Like you like you'll see like a guy on the street and you're like, uh, I just I'm like, there's no fucking.
Reason why I'm me and he's him.
I mean there's like empirical reasons, like you know, we grew up differently and blah blah blah blah and all that stuff, but like what why is my consciousness and my why why I Why am I.
Living my experience? And why is he living his?
I'm pretty sure I believe in free will, but there's also something weirdly deterministic about why we end up the way that we do, because there's like when I see it on the street, I'm like, Okay, he probably was born to like he probably had shitty parents and probably grew up shittier than I did, and that led them every that caused something in his brain that maybe made different decisions, And it.
Was like, well, what why the fuck was.
He born into that lived experience and I was born into mine. There's there's no there's a reason I'm not like an inherent like none of I don't think any of us were like as babies were like inherently fucking like blessed to live good lives and others to live shitty ones.
So I just have no ight. I can't I really can't explain that.
Like you can explain that empirically, but you can't explain cosmically why these things are the way they are.
I think I've also thought about that thing. I think of life. There's like a series of decisions. Dude, you're always pretty every second of every day, You're presented with a series of decisions, and your decisions do you where you want to go? I don't want to wake up to go to work out every morning at four o'clock in the morning. But you know what, I realized that if I don't, then that's gonna have identplications on my life.
Some people don't care, and some people aren't able to think about the future, but I'm blessed enough to be able to so I do. I know a lot of people around me, specifically, like I got one homie that I mean, dude, he makes great money, but his girlfriend is just a piece of shit and she does not want to go to work, and so they struggle every day even though he works as the ass off, and I got another homie that's worked at the same place for like ten years and it makes like twenty bucks
an hour. I'm like, dude, I don't know. And it's not like they're not skilled people, but yeah, it's hard.
I think about that too, I really.
I it's weird because I believe in free will, but I also am like, you know, because you have the ability to make your own decisions that determine what happened in your life. But a part of my soul just feels like, is I.
Why are some people.
Predisposed to make certain decisions that others are not?
Do you know what I mean?
Like, No, I get you, dude, I'm not even I'm not I'm just fucking around with this.
I'm just thinking. I just think about this stuff. I don't have, like it's definitive opinions on it.
And I don't think any of this too, but it's cool to think about.
Yeah, what the call, dude?
So that's like, so could I switch gears for a site? Yeah?
Sure?
So that's like a big reason that I actually listened to your podcast, dude, because I really like to take on things, and I think that the advice that you give people, even though sometimes vague. I think that's probably like the same shit that I would say. And actually, through listening to your podcast, man, I actually just went to my first therapy session last week. I think I'm actually doing pretty al right. I got some pretty manageable problems,
but just unpacking seems kind of nice. So I started ut, you.
Started going to therapy because of the podcast.
Yeah, dude, I started thinking about it. Well, not strictly because of the podcast. You know, where the seat actually blossom goes through, like Charlotte and the God off the breakfast.
Cool, let him. Let Charlotte and the God can have this one, for sure.
Well, it was just that was the first place I had ever heard of it, like, you know, people being open about that and uh, you know, actually going to therapy and talking about it and not feeling weird about it. But then I listen to your podcast all the time I kind of thought about like what I would tell myself, and I mean, dude, just go unpack me and clear your head out a little bit. It's weird.
It's weird.
I didn't intend I uh, I didn't ever. I don't think I ever intended to be like a therapy guy. It happened very accidentally, dude.
I love your story.
Man.
I wish that I would have cast ali saw some shit like you did. I'm twenty seven. I live in the middle of Illinois, dude, and every day I wake up and I think about, how the fuck maybe I could just not have to go to work tomorrow. No, I know I have to, but it sucks ass and I don't want that, dude. If I could do something like you do, dude, I would love that shit. Even if I could work for somebody like you and be a fucking assistant, that would be amazing.
So, well, you said you had a thing in particular you wanted to talk about.
Is this it? What is the thing?
No? No, I was just riffing with you, and so do the You know what, man, dude, I've been a heavy drinker for the past like ten years and I'm twenty seven, so it's been a good person in my life.
Okay, are you still a heavy drinker?
Yeah? I just cracked one right now, dude. I'm working on it, and I'm slowly trying to taper off and work on a big topic in my therapy.
But yeah, so I'm curious.
Well, uh, I mean you know, I'm not a real therapist, but I'm down to chat about this shit.
Uh.
So, like, uh, here's what's awesome about alcohol is that, Uh I think people are generally happier when they're in the present and they're not like depressed about the past or worried about the future.
And alcohol does.
A really good job of making you fully present. Then you have to pay for it later. You know, you're you're borrowing from the future for that presence. But like, that's why it's it's condictive, is because you're it's you're it's like the short cut to living in the present.
So I guess I think it's a good take.
So I'm curious about this. What uh what is preventing you from living in the present?
You know, it's a good question, man, That's one that I haven't talked about.
You know.
I think I I I to suffer from a lot of anxiety. I think that myself prevents myself from connecting with other people the way I would like to, whether that be getting frustrated or feeling not understood or I'm not really sure, you know, Like that's a that's a very it's a very tough question, you know, but I think that's probably the base of it.
What's your real therapist tell you?
Well, I just had my first session last week, so I haven't really figured it out yet, but you know, we talk a lot about uh, you know, are in the one session, I was talking a lot about, Yeah, do you ever feel like life is kind of just like on repeat? Sometimes? Like you wake up, well, I mean maybe now you wake up, go to work, come home, go to sleep, like kind of just feels yeah. Anonymously, I guess, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So I think that's
also a big problem with it. And you know, I know that you also have tried stand up comedy, man, and you know, through watching Kill Tony Man, it's actually been one of the things that I wanted to do, is just get up on stage somewhere and open mic. I got a couple of jokes I've written might not be the funniest, but they don't suck as bad as some of those guys.
Well, it's it's funny because I would I would think you would watch Kill Tony and be like, oh this, uh, I never want to do this. This seems awful.
Dude. I love that show Man, but it's people I cam and like, you know, all the dudes that go up there and just kill it, Like, dude, I love that shit.
I just well because I always uh, well, actually no, no, I I took what I just said back because there is something about watching somebody do stand up comedy that's bad that makes you go, oh, I could do this shit.
So I see where you're coming from.
Yeah, it's crazy though, dude, even just when you picked up the phone, it's it's weird how you get nervous at times you really didn't think you'd get nervous, you know. So I could see myself getting on stage and just you know, maybe clam it up a little bit. I definitely would have to power through that shit.
But well, yeah you have to do I mean you have to do it.
You have to do it hundreds and hundreds and hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of times.
That's right, dude. I just want to try. Man.
I don't know.
I don't think it's it's not like a I don't want to change my career or anything, you know, but I think it'd be cool. Dude. I think it's a good, you know, something to do.
So you're so you're feeling like life is just getting too monotonous and you wanted to shake it up.
Well, I mean, yeah, dude, I'm so. I've been with my girl for nine years. Dude, I'm twenty seven. We got our we just bought our second house. We got two dogs, Like, oh gosh, I'm really doing the family life, you know. And I've worked construction for the past six years. I just joined the union. I had to take a little bit of a pay cut, but you know, in four years or in three more years, I'll be making you know, one hundred and twenty grand a year. Issue.
So pretty set. But man, dude, it's just day and day out, and sometimes it's the same shit.
Uh oh. I have a few questions.
You bought a second house, like as in, you sold your first house second one.
Yes, yes, we no, no, we told our first one and got her second.
Okay, you have two dogs. You have a wife, that's cool.
Not a wife, she's a girlfriend. We're playing. I want to become a journeyman to make little bit more money. Before we decided we want to get married, not if we don't want.
A girlfriend of nine years is basically a wife. Good point, there's no there's nothing if you guys getting married. I don't think we'll change really much in your relationship.
At this point.
Very good point, but I went.
To, fuck, do I know I've never been married.
Huh, So I mean, what do you want to what do you want to do with your with your life?
Well, the first thing was stop drinking so fucking much. Dude.
Yeah, sure you had a little issue.
With that, But I mean, dude, really, what I want to do with I want to figure out how to make videos of some kind that somebody would enjoy to where I could maybe do something like you do, even if it's just on the side. I think that would be really fucking cool. Dude. I don't know where to start or how to get the ball, okay, actually do anything like that. But dude, I really admire what you do.
Well, you just you just you just do it. You just do it.
I I know that there's like there's a lot to be said behind like, oh, you know, can I can I make a career out of doing this? Can I like get some steamrolling from doing this? But at the end of the day, I keep saying at the end of the day, that's my catchphrase apparently, But.
I really think at the end of the day.
It's like everything is just about the process of it, right, So what do you what process would you enjoy doing? If you like writing jokes and getting on stage and telling them, then just then just do it for the love of the process itself and then you die.
That's it, Okay, you know what? Uh?
What?
What processes?
What?
What?
What?
That's a real question. What processes would you enjoy doing?
You know, I actually have a question for you. If it was if everything changed tomorrow, man, if you had to go back to doing anything other than what you're doing now because it's not working anymore.
Where would you start if I had to do anything other than what I was doing?
Yeah, just like for income, like to support yourself, Like if you had to restart, like like the getro thing was totally over, Like, where would you start? I'm just curious.
Sure, Well, well, like if I I guess, if I was like twenty two.
I graduated from this, if this was tomorrow, if this was tomorrow, Yeah, like you guys, the experience of doing all this and like tomorrow it's just over. You gotta find somewhere else.
If I got to find something else to do, Honestly, I'd probably like go The real answer is I would probably go bohemian mode to be honest, what does it mean? Like I would just I would go on like one of those like workaway sites or whatever, and I would be like, uh, I would be like, let me go to a work on a guy's farm in Italy and
he can in exchange for a bed. Yeah, I would, I think if I that's what I would do if I had no money and I and I had no thing to make money, I would just be like, well, I would probably honestly would probably do is I'd probably like like if I, like, if I had to start over and I had no money, I would probably like go work at a bar or a restaurant or something and like try to save up a little bit to like go do that kind of workaway shit or like work at a hostel or any kind of like job
where I could travel and meet people and stuff.
So, so you said something really intriguing. So your first answer wouldn't be to do something on the internet. So you do you do you really feel like this was a stroke of luck or do you think that where Why wouldn't it be to go back on the internet?
Think about the internet, because the Internet is not where life happens.
Well, that's where you make your money.
Yeah, yeah, yeah it. I got very lucky that the Internet is now where it's totally. It was a struggle luck. I got very lucky that the Internet became where I make where I make money. But I mean, I mean personally, my my, I enjoy life the most. When I mean I'm enjoying, I'm enjoying talking to you right now, you know, because we're on.
The the phone, which I guess is less being on the internet. But like, I mean, knowing what I know, now, that's what I would do.
Okay, that's a very interesting answer. I didn't expect that.
What did you expect me to say, some.
Type of Internet game? I mean, like, look at like somebody like Steeple will do it. He got kicked off YouTube. You know, his first thing is to find any other internet that sort of you know, revenue. Once you come from that kind of life, even though that might not be where you're living. I would just see it as being hard to transition back to any type of ninety five.
Uh No, I don't think. I don't think I would do it nine to five. I think I would do like.
Well, even just anywhere you have to wake up and do physical labor compared to what you're doing currently, because like I mean, I'm a carboner. He's like, I'm used physical labor and shit. But after I didn't do it for a couple years, I sure fuck wouldn't want to come back to it.
Yeah, but I don't know. I mean, life also just kind of hit. You know, you can fantasize about whatever, and then you know, maybe maybe when I shot up at that farm in Italy, I'll be like, oh wait, this fucking sucks.
Yeah, hold on, Can I ask you some awful all shit? What do you think about Adam twenty two? What?
I I don't think anything about Adam twenty two. I merely know that he's a guy with a podcast.
Dude, would you ever like switch it up and do some like freaky gecko shit, because that would also be another with the avenue you could go to?
What is? I don't what?
What do you dude think about? You got some crazy listeners, Dude, I guarantee you to get five of them to dress up as geckos and just have orgies and you can stream it and you could capitalize off them.
Jesus man, I don't. I don't know what to say about that. That's uh, I appreciate.
Here's here's what I'm gonna say. Here's what I'm gonna say.
I I am very flattered that you think that people would want to see that.
That's what I'll say to that.
I don't know that I would purchase, but I guarantee you to have a I'm very.
I'm very flattered that you think that people would would pay money to watch that.
Dude, what if you didn't even have to be in it? You could just host these things.
So you're saying if I I could just like I like you're saying that I have, I could have a second career in making pornography.
Dude, you totally good.
Actually, I think I've told this story before, but I'll tell it again. I was at I was at a v N which is like the porn convention, and I was like talking to this like, uh, I made a friend. He's he's a porn star. He's a nice guy. And we were talking and I made a joke to him about like starting an OnlyFans. I was like, oh, maybe I'll do a Gecko OnlyFans And he looked at me like very like he didn't take it as a joke, because that's I realized I made a joke about what
he actually does. And he looked at me and he very seriously said, oh, yeah, you can make a lot of money doing that.
And I was like, I'm not the only one I think so, Dude, I don't.
I don't think that. I don't think that that's what I'm gonna do. But uh, I don't know, dude.
What about what about god Kid? You guys still cool? I really liked that episode you guys did. I thought that was out of a lot of your episodes. It was really good, dude, I didn't expect it to be.
Uh doj Cat's a good don't you guys? Very cool?
I'm a fan, dude, Dude, get her to take you on stage.
I don't know. I don't know if. I don't know if it works like that necessarily.
But dude, wait, hold on by the way, by the way, by the way, by the way. I feel like we got off track here because you had to. You wanted to talk about yourself, and you got you flattered me and I've been talking about myself, which is just I understand why people want to call in to talk about themselves on this show. It feels good.
But uh, I mean, dude, I kind of just like taking your brain a little bit. Dude. I like seeing what you think about things.
Yeah.
Maybe you know, maybe in another life I could have been a porn star. Maybe maybe why not? I don't know, why not? Why not?
Why not? Dude? You never know what ten years is down the road? Me, don't ever say it never.
That's cool. I mean, I don't know, dude.
I like the idea. I'll say this, I'll say this too. I'll say this to you. I'll say this to you. I like the idea of being comfortable and confident about my body. That's why I make those little uh that's why I'll post pictures of myself on my Instagram in a speedo. There's something there. There's there is something I think freeing that feels good about, like being out there in that sense and not really not caring what other people think of your body.
I think that's a freeing thing.
Speaking of man, how you've been doing the gym, buddy?
Uh? Oh, well, I've been on tour, so I've been eating candy.
Oh, I'll ship, dude, candy is a ship. But as long as you're going to the gym and being active. Dude, you got that man like who cares? I think I think it would be really positive for you if you they actually make it there once today. That's one of the one things that kind of provides a little bit of rigidity in my life and alps me not want to drink so much. Are you When I leave? I feel so good?
Dude, are you in AA? Do you do AA?
No?
I don't necessarily. I think that I drink for more deep rooted issues. So that's why I started therapy. I think group sessions isn't necessarily what I'm looking for. So when I was younger, I actually had to attend like NA and AA meetings because I got caught with pot high school and out of some weird restriction. That's what they maybe do. And I never felt necessarily comfortable around a lot of people twice my age dealing with more significant problems on my own. I feel like it's almost
made me look down on my own problems. So more individualized approach is a little bit better for me.
Yeah.
Yeah, I've been to a couple of those kinds of meetings before. They're it's kind of nice. It's kind of nice to be like, oh, there's other people who have the.
Same problem that I do.
I'm not an alcoholic. I've never been a big alcohol man, but but.
I get it. Like I said, it puts you in the present.
When I'm on tour after the show, if I'm hanging out with folks, I'll have a couple of beers or something like that, and it's, uh, it's nice.
It's nice. It puts you in the present. It makes it way easier to talk to people.
Sometimes I get exhausted, especially if it's like, I mean, I'm fine talking to you right now, but it's like if I'm one on one talking to somebody.
I'll get so exhausted.
Like I hate I can't like like if I meet up with somebody and it's just me and them, I get kind of tired.
My favorite I love.
I love when it's like when I'm like in a group of like two or three other people and like you can stop, I can stop talking and let the other two people talk for a while.
It's that's awesome.
There's nothing fucking better on the planet Earth than being like a little buzzed and standing around in a group of other in a group of other people that you're a part of while they all talk, and you can just kind of beat and you're out and you're around other people, but you don't have to do anything.
It's the best.
I've been like that only, dude. That's like when you say a couple of edibles. Dude, that's the only thing that does it to me. I don't want to talk to anybody. I just want to sit and listen.
Well, well, shit, well, uh, I got one more question, all right, hit.
Me with your one more questions, sir. It's been a nice conversation.
You ever been in trouble the law?
Have I ever been in trouble with the law?
I hope you got a good one for me, dude. If not, I got one for you, I'm sure you do.
So.
I have ever been in trouble with the law? Uh? Have I ever been in trouble? I've ever been like a writin.
No, I have never been arrested or like I mean, I got my ra caught me smoking weed in my dorm room in college.
That's probably Uh, that's really it, all.
Right, dude. Well let me leave you with this one, all right. So it was the first time me and a group of guys like, dude, all my closest friends. When we were like eighteen years old, we all got acid for the first time, right, And I don't know if you take an acid, but there's a difference between acid and research chemicals. I didn't know. Acid wasn't supposed to taste like anything. So if you ever take a tab of acid, tells like irritates like metal, spin it out, dude.
It's not worth it. Man, you don't have a violent trip, Dude, it's gonna be real rough. So we all popped these tabs right about an hour goes by. Everybody's feeling it and everybody's having a good time. All of a sudden, dude, one of my guys turns the lights out and starts yelling at everybody. There's cops there, right, and so we all duck down. We're all hiding or whatever, and all of a sudden, we see two cops run past the window, and so my buddy, he's tripping out, Dude, he's thinking
that we're all about to go to jail. Everybody's fucking like having a bad trip, and it was terrible, right, So this is what actually happened, dude, So about like thirty minutes after we took the tabs, this dude got pulled over directly in front of my guy's house, some random dude that nobody knew. And this dude ended up fucking taking off and running from the cops. So the cops ran right past the garage and we're all sitting there hiding from him for like an hour, and all
they did was run past. Nobody ended up getting arrested and nothing happened. Man, dude, though the crazy first trip. If I wasn't all nervous right now, I probably would have told the story about her. But man, that was a good one.
Well, uh, what's your name again? Man, I'm Chris, Chris Chris. This is a nice conversation.
This.
I feel calm. I feel calm. I feel comfortable talking to you. For whatever reason, you seem you're a cool guy.
Thanks, dude, I appreciate that. Man. Hopefully I'll get to come to one of your shows and beat you in person. Man, I would definitely have a beer with you some storyully.
Well, hopefully hopefully we don't have a beer together.
Hopefully we hopefully you know what I'd love, I'd loved I'd love maybe one day we can share a diet coke.
That sounds nice.
That sounds nice. You're right, what city?
What city are you in?
I'm an Illinois man. I'm like great out Chicago.
Oh okay, all right, hopefully I'll come back to Chicago at some point. I had some good times there. Chris, it is nice talking to you brothers. There anything else you want to say to the people of the computer before we go, No.
Man, Just dude, I had to call like a hundred times, so if you're calling a hundred times that it might work once. Take care, mister Chris, Ety buddy.
That was Chris. That was Chris.
I've decided in this show, I kind of I've been thinking a lot about this podcast. This podcast, it's mainly like, uh, it's mainly other people talking, which is nice. But I've decided I also I want to talk a little bit more. So that's why sometimes I talk over people, so which I guess I shouldn't do. But I'm trying to be more confident, trying to express myself. I'm trying to speak more and not be so anxious about things. I'm trying to share things about my life. It feels good, it
feels good to talk and ramble, and I don't. I'm not as concerned about I'm trying to be less concerned about rambling uh or repeating myself.
But I also I think I would. I don't.
I don't like the idea that the pocket. It's like I want a little balance, you know. I don't want it to be just me and my thoughts because I'll get sick of myself almost immediately, But so I'll sprinkle.
Them in here and there, like I'm doing right now.
Never goes on the line taking your phone calls every night, never goes to his side's.
Teaching you aloud in them of your life. But he's not really an expert.