Hey, gek, how's it going?
You know, man, it's going all right. Uh. I think I started off this recording session with a lot of energy because but it's it's kind of I feel like I'm crashing a little bit. Has ever happened to you?
Yeah, yeah, I I've been crashing a lot lately. Like I I don't know. It was definitely an after college type deal where I just I feel pooped a lot of the time.
But yeah, yeah, so tell me what is it you wanted to talk about.
Well, there's a few things, I guess right now, I am like pretty I am pretty depressed, I would say, but like there are things that I, like I should be happy about. I mean, shit, I'm happy to be talking to you right now, to be honest. But uh also have some O c D that drags me down
a lot during the day. And it's just like filled with a lot of intrusive thoughts, a lot of like i'd like it's more like compulsions too to my thoughts, because like O c D is like more towards reassurance, Like you have to consistently like reassure yourself a lot of the time, and it just takes up like hours of my day and like I could be doing more too, do better about it, but it's just it's been really hard. It's been really hard.
What do you? What do you? What are you attempting to? You assure yourself of on a daily basis.
That I'm a good person. That uh I'm like, uh, like I'm a good guy. I know I'm a good guy, but it's like a lot of the times it's like I'm a good person. And then also this is like a weird one because when I was like very young, like MYOCD started with like you know, intrusive thoughts, you know, just like really weird ones. And then like it also it almost became a compulsion to like step on cracks
on the sidewalk. And now it's like now it's like, oh, I can't use my left leg, and it's like, hey, Willhelm, you can use your left leg, like you can walk, you can use it. And it's starting to get out of hand where it's like a compulsion of just like not using my left leg. And it sounds like crazy
because like that's what OCD does to you. It's like, you know, you just constantly reassure yourself when you feel like you're going in in a in a spiral, in a cycle, and yeah, so like it's sometimes it's like I don't feel like I'm like balanced, Like I like it's like a reassurance of like my body is like balanced. But also I think this I think what this really stems from is it's like another thing too is uh probably I think it stems from like Bobby dysmorphia, to.
Be honest, Yeah, yeah, well what kind of body.
I think it's the sense that well, like I was like really fit going into college, Like I was a pretty sick guy. I went to the gym like very regularly, and then I like started smoking more wheat, and I think that's when a lot of the anxiety started to was around that corner. So it felt like I had to go for this perfection. And then this was also when COVID started too. This was like around I was like a freshman in college, and so there was like the built up anxiety of like I need this perfection
of like my body. And then there's like also like I don't know, the anxiety from smoking. And then and then on top of that, I got cooped up in an apartment you know, with some roommates. There were some nice guys, but there's just anxiety from that. And it was like a lot, it was a lot of like and during all of that, and sorry to cut you off, but like during all of that, it was like a lot of internalization of like these feelings of anxiety.
I've been. I don't know if the things I've had to say or in any way, shape or form related to what you're talking about, but I think i've been. I was today, I was thinking about anxiety because I have a lot of anxiety. I think my anxiety has gotten a lot worse in the past couple of years. It's maybe like doubled or you know, maybe like times one point five or whatever. But I think I've always had a little bit of anxiety, and I've been thinking about it a lot, and I I've realized that, well
a few things. Anxiety is like a is a it's like a thirst for control. I think like like like there's a weird comfort. There's a weird comfort and anxiety and it makes you, uh feel like you're in a way,
it feels like it guides you. Like I don't know if you've ever experienced and I think maybe you alluded to this a little bit, that there's like a like when you're not being productive or you're not like moving your life forward in a meaningful way, Uh, it makes you anxious and in that way, and that anxiety, even though it's it doesn't make it makes that anxiety is weirdly like holding you accountable to do more with your life.
But it's a weird paradoxical thing because on one hand, you could say that you're anxiety is helping to light a fire under your ass to keep moving your life forward productively, but it all but it also is making the version of your life that you're currently living worse because you're uncomfortable all the time. And so I don't know, but I don't I'm not gonna say if these are
good things or bad things. I'm trying to let my anxiety go because after a while I do feel like, oh, if I'm like I use my anxiety to protect myself, you know, like like if I'm if I'm always anxious that something really bad is going to happen to me in some weird form, I think subconsciously, I feel like my anxiety that something really bad is going to happen to me is protecting me from the bad thing, because if I let my guard down for just a second and if I throw my anxiety away, if I put
it away, that's when the bad thing is going to strike, and my guard is gonna be down. I'm not gonna be protected but U And so I've been thinking about that a lot because I would love to be less anxious.
It would make my life better. And I think I'm slowly starting to arrive at a point where I'm gonna I'm gonna try one of my Like I know this is thinking very far ahead, but one of my twenty twenty five goals is to like let go of my anxiety and just like see what life is like if I let my guard down and just accept the circumstances of life instead of always trying to be on a defensive. And I'm really excited for that. I don't know why I've I don't know. I don't know why I've chosen
twenty twenty five to do that. I don't know why I can't just do that right fucking now. It's because I'm just procrastinating because I'm scared. But it's weird, I think anxiety. I think I I could definitely write a long list of ways in which my anxiety has helped me. But I could write a really long wait list of ways in which anxiety has just made my life uh suck.
And I know and by the way I know anxiety, I know that that what I'm talking about is very differently from like O c D. Specifically, I know OCD is a very specific kind of anxiety. But I I I'm not a fucking I'm a dude in a gecko costume who's just who's experienced anxiety. And I'm anecdotally making these conclusions. But for me, if it's it's definitely a control thing. It's definitely a control thing. And if I'm letting go of that control, I'm what else do I have.
I'm I'm naked, I'm bare, my supple body is exposed to the to the world.
You know.
Yeah, I don't know if thats.
No, it does because like I I agree on, I agree on like the seeking of control because like you know, when like I, so, here's crazy thing Like when I was little, I told you about the cracks, right, and this was like I don't know, probably like early middle school, and this, uh, this had gone on for a summer, like I would I would have to touch this crack. I felt like I had to touch this crack or
you know if I even man. It was hard waking up in the morning because I had like blue carpet in my room, and the blue carpet would change to
a blonde carpet into the hallway. So there's like that line that crack between the door leaning to the hallway in my room, and I'd have to touch it every day, and and it was a constant spiral of like I need to, I need to, I need touch that because I have to remind myself that that I don't have to do that, so I need to show an example of you know me, you know, being able to walk through and like, you know, if I touch it, it'll
keep me safe. And you know, it went on for three months, and you know, I didn't I didn't seek help, which I should have, but I woke up one day in my little tights car bed and I said, fuck this, and I walked past the crack and it felt like a lot. I felt like a lot of anxiety at first, but like as the days went on, it did like decrease, and I eventually like escaped it, and I like, I
think that's what, like, you know, could happen again. I know that's what can happen again if I, you know, oppose my compole shouldn't and my and my thoughts and my anxiety is that if I push through and not, like you said, let us you know, be be naked to the world. I think, you know, in a in a I don't know, analogy type way, we'll be able to find our clothes again.
Well you ever, you ever, bro, you ever meet you ever? You ever meet someone who has no anxiety? You know you ever meet a person like that?
Yes?
Yes, And you're just like, and I'm I'm always amazed by that. I'm always like, I don't know, I I like, it's like meeting a It's like a unicorn or something. It's like, this is a magical being and look at that.
They're still alive and we were I think people would like And it's a weird thing, right because I think, Okay, like I'll just go back to like whatever anxiety of not being productive or of not moving your life forward, there's a weird paradox where like you're anxious that if you don't move your life forward, you're not gonna be happy, so you make yourself unhappy so that you can move
your life forward so that you can be happy. Like it's a weird paradox, Whereas when you meet someone with no anxiety, they're just naturally okay and happy because they're fucking because they're living in the moment. That's what makes people happy. I think it's naturally okay. And every time I see that, I'm like, I had to fag you get there, And I don't know, I really I wonder
this a lot. Is like people who are like that, did they Was there a process they underwent in which they consciously decided to, through various repetitions, throw their anxiety to the curb so that that became the natural mode of thinking. Or were they just born that way? Most of them are probably just born that way. Probably, But that doesn't mean that one cannot, through repetitions, become a less anxious person. And then also and not by the way,
that's the internal side of it. There's also the external side of it. If you, I think, if you've experienced, if things are going well in your external life, it is easier to be less anxious, And then the inverse is true.
Do you think like your ego gets in the way of like I don't know if it's like an ego of like, you know, like for me, it's definitely not an ego of like not seeking help. It's like I
can do this, like I can get through it. And then it's like I get anxious and then I get lost in spiraling thoughts and compulsion and like I don't know if that's like like a like I don't know, like I guess, like for me, like you mentioned you know that person who you know used to be happy, or you mentioned a person who is a happy, go lucky person and you know they live like in the moments and you're like, holy shit, like how did that happen?
And it's like for me, it's like I used to like be that person.
And sorry, I don't want to cut you. I don't want to cut you. I don't sorry, I don't want to cut you off. But your phone is being shitty? Is there anything that you can do to make it not?
Oh?
Here in one second, Okay, we don't We don't have to cut this part out of the podcast. We can keep this, we can keep this in. Let's keep this technically, yes, yes, go I don't know why I want to keep it in, but I just it's something about it feels nice. Let's keep this particular tech glare. Okay, you were saying you were talking about the idea of a happy, go lucky person.
Yes, yeah, yeah, and like I used to be that person, like growing up.
Oh so you went the other way around?
Yeah, yeah, I went the other way around here. One second, Yeah, I went the other way around, and like, yeah, I was very happy, go lucky. And part of my I think OCD or anxiety is like I want that back, Like I'm trying to reassure myself, like hey, like if you just do this, I'll get this back. And then it's like one little small mistake and it's like, oh my gosh, it's it's it's over or it's not over.
Well, okay, so why did it hold on? Well, so you say you used to be okay, you used to be a person who had less anxiety, and now your person has more anxiety, and you you're correct pining and now you're pining for the past where you had less anxiety. Why do you think you have more anxiety?
Now? That is a good question, I think, uh m hm uh it might be a speaking of control because I feel like this is like a consistent theme with like you know, going after that that past of like the happy go lucky self, going after this perfection. I actually lose what I had by going after it, and
I you know, I don't know. I think, well, i'll tell you what my my is that because of my you know, when this started about you know, going after this this body, this perfect type or not even perfect type, just like a very lean body, because I want to be an actor and I want to, you know, go into movies. And you know, I got caught up with you know, looking a certain way and going after this
you know, this this body type. And you know, I I think it was I think partially it was that's going after something that's on it, Like you know this thing that you see through this the screen, you know, it's it's it's unattainable.
So you're you're part of part of your anxiety has increased because well let me ask you that, how old are you?
Uh, I'm twenty three.
Okay, And this time period that this narrative that you were less, that you were a happy, go lucky person, now you're not. When were you this so called happy, go lucky person.
I'd say the last time was probably senior year of high school, freshman year of college.
Okay, so few, yeah, okay, because part of me feels yeah, go ahead, or.
I just want to give you more of a time frame. The my first semester of college, no going into the spring break of my second semester of my freshman year of college is when COVID hit. But that's just I don't know, I don't know why I need to mention that, but there's some time frame for you, I guess.
Anyways, what were you Yeah, okay, so well I was going to Okay, I actually take back what I was going to say that.
I think just growing up gives you a little bit more, just gives you more anxiety. There's more responsibilities I was talking about. My mom told me that because I told her I was anxious, and she she was like, well, I think part of it is just yeah, when you become an adult, you just have more shit you got to deal with, though not inherently, I mean maybe inherently. I mean you got to figure out a way to eat, and you gotta figure out a way to not You
just gotta figure out and not die. That's the and not dying gets a little bit harder when you become an adult because for most of your life other there's a lot of other people around you making sure that you don't die. And then as you get older, less and less people try to make sure that you don't die. And then you get really old, and then you and then you go into a hospital and then again, and then you're again there's other people making sure you don't die,
but then you're more likely to actually die. I don't know if that makes you.
Feel like it yeah, it's like a maybe it's sorry. Well, maybe it's like losing. I don't know that it wasn't like, you know, I wasn't a crazy kid.
It was like I'm invincible. I can withstand fire and cars and whatever. But you know, there's that type of like feeling. I don't know, at least for me when I was a kid, where I was like, oh, wow, it's gonna be a great day, Like it's gonna I can't wait.
So what happens today?
Okay, yeah, let's talk about that. So when you were a kid, you had a feeling that it was a great that you woke up and you were like Oh, it's a great day. I can't wait to see what happens today.
No, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
You know, dude, I really want to be able to describe this feel. I had this feeling last night. I had this feeling last night that like everything was gonna be okay. And I think I had been searching for that feeling externally, and that feeling is not permanent. It's gonna fade and I'm gonna go and say tomorrow, But I just like I had that feel. I had that feeling, and I really I felt it deep. I felt calm,
and I was like, epiphanies aren't permanent. They that you have to have them multiple times over and over again. But I had this little epiphany where I was like, oh, I really do think that all of this is perspective. I have nothing to envy about anyone else. I'm gonna be alright in and of myself.
Uh.
I just I don't know. I just adopted this perspective that I don't need to be fucking anxious all the time. And I just felt it. I felt it, and I felt like I could get there it just in my own brain. And so when you say when I was a child, I woke up and life was exciting and
I was looking forward to things. I do believe that that feeling that you're envious of your childhood's self about is yeah, is accessible to you, and you can just kind of I know, I understand the the inkling to believe that this is total bullshit, because some days I do believe in it and some days I don't. But I kind of do believe that anytime you want, you
can just decide to feel that way. M Yeah, some days it's going to be more difficult to make that decision, and other days it'll come a bit more easy to you. But I do fundamentally believe that life.
Is uh.
I don't always feel this way. I'm feeling this way in this moment right now as I'm talking about all this stuff to you, But at my best, I'm operating from a place that life is just about perspective, and I think you can decide, you can just decide. I know this is I get where, but I think I can just decide for me personally. I feel like on there are certain days I can just decide to not be anxious, and I can decide I'm going to enjoy life, and I can decide to be optimistic, and I kind
of have that. I have that choice every day, and again, sometimes it's easier to make sometimes it's not, depending on what's going on around me. But I kind I really just think that every day of the choice is here. I don't know if that means anything.
No, no, no, yeah, yeah, that's that's pretty helpful. I I agree, because like, you know, uh, this childhood self of mine, like I I didn't care well like you know, if you know, I I didn't care if like someone called me names at school, or if kids tease me, or you know, if I you know, I don't know, uh did bad for an audition or I embarrassed myself,
like I mean, of course I'm human. Like I felt, you know, maybe embarrassed in the moment or like I was like, oh man, that was kind of mean, you know whatever, But then I was like, oh, oh, well, like you know, like hey, let's let's go over here and see what happens and you know, have some fun. And I think also, I think a reason I had this personerspective when I was young is my parents are
much older. When when I was a little kid, I kind of just like I thought to myself, like oh my gosh, like when I'm this age, like my parents might be gone.
Yeah yeah, yeah, and.
Like you know, my my I told that to my parents and they comforted me and you know, and I don't know why, but like I think there's like something from that when I was a kid where I was just like I I'm going to have this perspective of just enjoying the day and then enjoying life. I mean, it could have been like a kid thing, you know, type deal, you know, a kid perspective also like I did, you know.
But it's not. Yeah, but it's not that is ah. I mean, I mean, fuck, man, you can yeah, if you really want Yeah, if you really want to, you totally if you bro, if you really want to, you totally can just sit in a room and go, oh my god, I'm gonna die and my parents are gonna die and all these bad things are gonna If you really want to, yeah, you can. If you it's you can totally choose to marinate in the all the misery that there is to soak up at the temporary nature
of life. Uh, and you'd be right, and every single marination would be correct, every single negative thought that you had about how life is suffering and you're gonna die and everyone ever you'd be so correct and all of them, but it'd be a bad way to live, you know, it'd be a bad It wouldn't be a good life to live.
Uh.
I don't know if it's comforting to you, but if it's cot, we are we all are doing this, yes, sir. Some of us live in slums and others live in mansions, but we're all going in the same fucking place. And that's I kind of that's comforting to me.
Oh the oh you mean like, oh, oh, like we're all going to this like same destination, like as in death in the end.
No, yeah, we're all going We're all we're all going to hell because we failed to accept Jesus Christ as our Lord and savior. We're all going to hell. And that makes me feel better.
Yeah, yeah, I get that. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Well was this was this was helpful to you in any way, shape or form?
This was? Uh yeah, I'd say this was pretty helpful. You know. I I should journal more. I definitely should. It's just like I don't know, it's definitely a perfectionist part of me that I need to accept that I am a damn perfectionist and I need to accept that there is there's just all in perfection in the world, and I just need to journal. But I think the reason I hold that off is because I you know,
it's like, oh, I'm journaling this to myself. I'm journaling what I already know to myself, and you know, it's it's nice to be able to talk to someone and like really like flesh out like your thoughts and feelings.
Yeah, I'm really helpful. Good, Now, this was helpful for me too. This was not a lot of the One of the fun things about doing this show is like I feel like I get to work out my thoughts. I feel like I get to work out and express my thoughts on things, and I kind of leave being like because here's what's here's what I just before we go,
Here's what's going to happen. Is like I went on a I went on a whole big speech about how life is all and like that's great, and I met and I meant every word of what I said in the moment that I was saying it. But like tomorrow, the line is going to be too long at the fucking post office, and I'm gonna get pissed off, you know, like I'm gonna like like an actual fucking life, and then I'll be able to remind myself. I'm like, well, you just you went on that you know, big dumb rant.
So you know, maybe maybe try to be more like the thing that you're ranting about on your dumb podcast. So so thanks for giving me the opportunity to make that that dumb rant. I appreciate that.
Dude. I'm awesome. I'm glad I could help you too.
Is is there anything else you want to say to the people of the computer before we go.
You can accomplish anything you set your mind to and hard to. And I wish everyone the best in their life. And you know, yeah, I just wish everyone the best in their life. And I hope everyone has a prosperous and fulfilling life whatever it means to them. And yeah, I hope they have a good night too.
Thank you, Wilheim, Good luck, sir, have a good rest of the night.
Good luck to you. Thank you bye.
I like that guy who was nice, He was a good guy. His name Willheim, famous for the Wilheim scream. Brandon, can we put a Wilheim scream in the like right, like I'm gonna at the end of me saying this, We'll put a little moment here and can you just put a Willheim scream right there? Thank you? Brandon. Shout up, Brandon, Brandon, the producer of Therapy, getto the Wilheim scream. It's this. You guys have probably heard that scream before, right, It's like a It's like in a bunch of movies. You
guys know that scream. I would play. There's a live stream watching this right now. I can't play it for them because I don't have I'm not good at soundboards. But well, we'll put it in the podcast.
Hello, hey man, how you doing.
I'm doing I'm doing all right today. I'm doing all right. I'm not doing as well as I was doing yesterday, but I'm keeping it together.
What you did sound really really like happy yesterday.
I'm good.
I just got off work, just at home chilling.
Interesting, I said, do I sound significantly less happy today than I did yesterday?
Uh?
No, not really. I think you sound pretty fine. But I mean that's I'm not I'm certainly not an expert.
It's weird. It's kind of interesting. Having I feel like a fish and a tank sometimes and my behavior is being analyzed. I don't really mind, though, I don't I think so. You know how a lot of people I may have gone on this rant before, but I'll do it again. You know a lot of people they had that kind of they have the kind of fear of
like being perceived. Oh god, yeah, sometimes and I'm I feel I mean, you know, I do a show and people listen to my voice and stuff, and I know, I know empirically that I am being perceived heavily, but I don't feel that way. Or actually, I mean I feel that way sometimes, But at the end of the day, like what like in my maybe in my head and my anxiety, I feel perceived, but in my body and then when I'm in the present, I'm just like, oh,
I'm just uh, eating and going on the computer. Anyway. Anyway, I don't care. I don't. I don't, I don't. I don't care. What's up with you? Tell me about your life, Tell me why you called in.
Uh So, I was calling in today to talk about a stinky coworker that.
I have, Like he smells bad.
Yeah, he smells not good almost all the time.
Oh no, oh no, okay, what do you do? What do you work as?
Are you?
Are you in a truck with him and you're close quarters?
No, I mean I I don't know if I want to say, like where I work, but we are in close quarters like quite a bit.
What's the industry? U?
Military?
Okay, you're both in the military, right, are you in like the killing people in military? Or the building ships military? Which military?
The ship's military?
Okay?
Definitely not the killing definitely not the killing people.
Okay. I used to I might have said this on the podcast right about say it again. I used to think everyone in the army, I just think that that's I used to think that's what the army was, is like it's call of duty. You like, if someone says they're in the army, that means that they're like in a war zone with a gun shooting at people. And then I realized, oh, most of the most of the time, when someone says they're in the army, it's like they're like on the computer.
Yeah, it's mostly like most of the military at large is just like with just stickle stuff.
Anyway. Uh, okay, So you have a coworker who smells bad how long has he smelled that I do.
So I've only been working at this place for like a few weeks now, and uh, pretty much like the whole time I have been there. There's been like a couple of days where I think maybe he's taken a shower, But like talking to some of my other new coworkers, apparently this has been an issue with him for like a year and a half. Oh it's been like yeah.
Okay, and you're in the and you're the new guy.
I am the new guy.
Yeah okay, so you're trying. Okay. So it's been established in this group that this guy has smelled bad for a while, nobody has had the heart to tell him. And you come in and you come in and you're like, hey, this guy smells bad. Uh, and then everyone's like, yeah, we just deal with it. And you're like, oh no, I need to be the you. And you're like I need to be the change from within.
Go ahead, that's okay. So you're you're kind of half right there. So our supervisors have told him like over time to like, hey, please like wash your uniform and like take a shower. Oh, I guess the guy he's been told Yeah, like several times from what I understand, Okay, so yeah, but yeah, I mean he's he's been told, and you know, I guess it's like sometimes he'll get better about it and then he'll just like fall back
into being thinky again. So I mean it's I mean, he's not a bad guy either, Like he's he's pretty cool, he's pretty nice. He just doesn't shower or wash his uniform as much as he should. And like being the new guy, like I want to get there and like see things that might be wrong and like try to like improve things and like make everybody happy and stuff like that. But I it's just a weird thing to approach, like telling a grown ass man like, hey, you smell bad, please take a shower in like a nice.
I don't know what the culture is because I've only what's that move? What's the Stanley Kubrick movie Full Metal Jacket? Yeah, where like that's that's the only thing I know about the military is from that movie. Uh. And so it's it's interesting because I would think that that ship is like I view the military as a universe where a ship don't fly, you know what I mean, Like people are yelling at you and I'm like, how has this guy been able to go this long without just getting
his ass reamed out by his superior? That's kind of what happens. Is that not what happened?
I mean, it's it's usually not like a screaming at somebody, but it's like, hey man, you're fucked up, like fix yourself kind.
Of thing, and and they're superiors told multiple times that he's got to.
Wash up, right, yeah, like he like they had to like watch this guy take a shower just to make sure that he was actually clean kind of thing.
Like.
It's it's it has gotten that bad from.
What I've heard, bro, I think you just got to tell him because if this guy he's the If this guy is a nice guy, two things.
One one is, if this guy is truly is a nice dude, he would not want to make the life of the people working with him more difficult by smelling like shit if he truly is a nice man. And then two yeah, and then two and then two is well I was going to say this, and then I realized that he's been told before. But if I smelled like shit, I'd.
Want to know, you know, yea, you know, if I'm exactly same if I have a booger hanging out of my nose, like, please tell.
Me, yeah one time. If I have a booger hanging on my nose and you tell me, I'll probably like, I'll probably eat it with my tongue.
No, I mean yeah, just like real. I mean, you're a lizard, So yeah, Pat lizard.
Shit.
Uh, why don't you tell you you're gonn tell him? You're gonna tell this guy that he sinks.
I would like to. I think it's just like I've like, like I said, like, it's it's telling a grown ass man like, hey, you smell bad. I've never had to do that before. Thankfully hopefully I'll never have to do it again. But it's just like, how do I do this in a way where I'm not an asshole because I don't believe in that ship like, hey, you're fucked up, fix yourself types, Like I just want to like be constructive about it.
No, I don't think that you're trying. I don't think you're out here trying to police this man's life for power. You're just trying to get through the day without wanting to throw up pretty much. Yeah, So I think that's reasonable. I don't think that's being an asshole.
Okay, that's good. I think it's just how how do I say that in a.
In a nice way?
I guess, well, I feel like a lot of people in the military, they're like, I mean, they're like killing people, right.
Uh, I guess I haven't met anybody personally now, but okay.
So I mean general, that's I guess that's kind of my bar for being an asshole. I suppose, Yeah, if you're in the military, if you're killing people, and so I think if you, like, if you were if you said to me, this guy smells bad, I want to kill him, I'd be like, I would say to you, what's.
Your name, Brandon?
I'd say, Brandon. That's kind of an asshole thing to do, to kill a guy for smelling bad. But if you so, yeah, that's the situation where I would think you were an asshole. But if you said to me, I want to how this guy smells bad because it's making everyone else uncomfortable, I would be like, yeah, it sounds reasonable. So I don't think you're being an asshole if you're not. If you're doing that, yeah, is there anything else you want to say to the people of the computer before we go.
I guess take showers and wash your clothes if you don't already do it, you know, I don't know. I think that's about it. I appreciate you taking the time. Like I said, I've first time calling in, so this really nice time to talk to you, and hopefully I'll be able to see one of your lives show. Are you come into Southern California at any point.
Soonersh, Yeah, I'm coming to I'm coming to Los Angeles the Masonic Lodge November eighth and ninth. November eighth is sold out. November ninth has like a few tickets left if you want to jog from that.
Okay, that is a bit far for me, but I'm going to think about it.
But I mean, if you come, he said, So you said you said southern California.
I guess I should have said San Diego specifically. If you ever come down here, will most definitely be there.
Well, I did a show in San Diego a couple of years ago and it bombed really hard, and so I'm afraid to go.
But happened.
I just was I just wasn't funny. I just was not good.
Well, I mean there's probably go maybe the people being kicked.
No, I yeah something yeah, no, I think. I think. Sometimes you just gotta know. Sometimes you gotta take the l Sometimes you gotta be I think, if you like if, sometimes you gotta be like, I sucked, I was not I was not good because what the alternative is the alternative to be like if if the alternative is genuine psychopathy, to be like, the only reason one of my the only reason one of my endeavors would not go well is has to be because of other people. You're probably
a complete psychopath. So so sometimes you're gonna suck. Sometimes you're gonna suck in life. Sometimes in life you're gonna suck. Sometimes you're gonna suck. You're gonna be annoying. People are not gonna like you. You're gonna be really bad and not you're gonna smell bad. But and that's so you have to accept that you're, you know, imperfect, and you suck. Sometimes if it's always someone else's fault, then you know, I don't know. Maybe sometimes sometimes I do. Sometimes it
is sometimes it is, I don't know. Don't never don't quote me on anything I ever say. Somebody on the somebody in the YouTube comments quoted me. They like, I remember hearing that, Yeah, yeah, yeah, Oh did I say that already?
I think I think you mentioned it. I either heard it in the podcast or on a street a while back.
Someone that quoted somebody had quoted you. Someone quoted something I said, and I'm like, maybe uncomfortable. I'm like, don't don't quote me on anything. I'm just I'm just talking. I don't know. I'm just I wish. I wish all these podcasts like someone can listen to them once and then they disappear after everyone who's ever going to listen to them listens to them. Because I don't know, don't quote me on anything. I'm insane. Anyway, I'm sorry I dragged this out for too long. And you know what,
that's not your fault. That's mine. That's not your fault, that's mine. What's here? What's your name again?
Brandon?
Thank you for calling Brandon? Is there anything else you want to say to you already said? We already did that part. We already did that part.
I think what Yeah, I think doing it twice might be a bit too much. Thanks, Lyle.
I appreciate you.
I love you. I love you.
Too, see you later Bye.
Goes on the line.
Every night.
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