I'll get a team. Welcome to another installment of for You project. My name's Craig Garthy. But doctor Jodi Richards and Tiffany and Cook we're all here. Slow down a little bit, Taytay, take your time. Mum used to tell me when I was little, ta take your time because I used to talk too fast. It's hard to believe, Tiff, isn't it?
Who wit you? Talking fast? Talking lots?
Slow down, talking a lot?
Believe it?
Yeah, the fat, attention seeking only child. Doctor Jody Richardson. Welcome back. How are you?
I'm good. I'm really good.
Actually, just come back from a little holiday, so that was nice.
Where'd you go?
Went to the Gold Coast? Typical Australian family holiday destination.
It's no, It's no India, is it, Tiff.
It's no India, that's for sure. No mountain.
I know I've been following you online. Tif How incredible is that? A little piece of Everest.
A little bit of not Everest, but a little bit of the Himalayas that I'm carrying around everywhere I go.
Wow, what.
I'm interested to and I mean this genuinely, I'm interested to see the ongoing the flow on, and that's not there's no doubt there, there's just curiosity. Are you interested yourself? Me?
I am yeah, I actually am like I'm in the middle of it and I'm kind of sitting on the outside at the same time. It's it's it's a thing. It's a whole thing. I didn't expect.
Are you being the observer of youew or trying to be the observer of you? Have you getting your ear cart on?
Kind of kind of just what it happens. It's very interesting because we live in this world where you and I and doctor Jodi, we all we talk about this stuff and we're interested in it, and we're in the middle of it and we're doing it. And then sometimes things come left to field and this whole new shift and this whole newtive and it's like, oh yeah, all right, let's evaluate all of this. It's really cool.
And you know what's interesting is us pseudo academics. Well, Jody is an actual academic. I'm a pretend academic, but we think we're all over it because we're fucking researching the mind. Right, I'm doing a PhD. I'm researching the mind. I'm researching how people think. Well, guess what the fucking the mystics have known this ship for thousands of years, millions of years. You're way way late to the party. Harps jumbo, do better. All the spiritual gurus know the shit that you're now learning.
It's like funny, though, you come to a conclusion and then the way you The thing that seems to excite a lot of us the most is when we can link it back to the early days and it's like see, it's like, see, I found this new thing that already existed.
Well, I remember when I started, Jody, We'll get to you eventually, you know.
Chilling.
I remember when I started my PhD. On day one or day two, I was I was just trying to find a bit of the origin story of self awareness, you know. And was it Socrates I think said the beginning of wisdom is to know thyself. Well that was written I think two and a half thousand years ago. So this motherfucker was talking about self awareness before Jesus was even here, right, And I'm thinking, so, I'm not
really breaking any new ground over here at all. I'm just picking up rocks that have been picked up a million times before and going, hey, look, everyone a rock and all the fucking dead stoics and philosophers and you know, theologians are rolling their eyes going, no shit, you fucking knew bie. Like literally, there's no new wisdom, is there?
I mean there's nothing. There's new data, and there's new research, and there's new technology, but in terms of just human wisdom, I don't really think there's a lot of new ship. What do you think, Jodi?
I think that.
We need to find ways for the wisdom to relate to us as individuals, and so we can read books, we can listen to podcasts, we can watch YouTube videos. But what you've done tip is you've traveled and you've taken time out, and you've experienced a new way of thinking and living, and it always opens your mind when you're traveling. But I do think that original ideas aren't
as common as we'd like to think. But the wisdom that we develop within ourselves comes through making sense of what others have said before us and linking that with how we operate.
In our day to day kind of lives.
I think that there's lots of wisdom to be had, but we become wise when we find ways.
To make it our own. I suppose is what I'm trying to say.
Isn't it interesting how you can have the myriad of conversations that all three of us have had and all of our listeners have had. And then you know, tif, you and I and you and many others on your show have spoken about, you know, life and thinking and perspective and gratitude and fucking being still and consciousness and awareness and purpose, and we have all of these meaningful Go look at us, Look how fucking smart we are.
Look at the quality of this fucking exchange, this cerebral fucking gem, you know, And then you just go walk in bare feet on a mountain on the other side of the world and meet some beautiful people who go, you know, and then it's like you have these light bulbs that you never have in a conversation.
I was thinking about wisdom just just today. Actually not. There's knowledge, and we do all this knowledge seeking and then we apply strategies and practices and we put it into place and we evolve ourselves and we take some of that as wisdom. But then there was just like I experienced these moments where a whole level of wisdom just shifts in you and you go I know things differently now, not through knowledge or the strategies or of practice.
Some wisdom came to me, But I think that's the difference between wisdom and knowledge, and I don't think it can be taught. And I think everyone's version of wisdom is different. It's a personal thing. Or that's my interpretation of that word at this moment.
I reckon, I reckon, you could exchange. I could be wrong, But what you're talking about as wisdom could be insight or awareness. Also, Yeah, it's like I've got a different level of understanding or insight or awareness now as well. I think those things are into and I think, like, you know, there's knowledge and then there's what you do with the knowledge. Now, what you do with the knowledge,
that's an indicator of wisdom or intelligence. Perhaps, you know a lot of people know a lot of shit but don't operationalize it in a way that makes their life better, you know, which is why we have unhealthy doctors and unhealthy personal trainers. No disrespect to doctors or trainers, but it's true. It's like knowing stuff doesn't guarantee anything other than you know stuff. You know? Yeah, So, Dr Jodi, how have you.
Been I have been good. Actually, I've been.
Experiencing some new ways of recovery after exercise and just to kind of like help me settle after some really busy weeks of speaking and travel, and that includes ice babs and saunas and frequencies for ner acoustics.
I've been diving into.
Some different experiences, which has been pretty awesome. And I realized I thought I was a hero when I stayed in the ice bath for ten minutes when it is nine degrees and then the next time I went back and it was six degrees, I was in pain. Two minutes was all I could manage. So yeah, like life's
been good. I've had lots of opportunities to connect and speak and families well, and yeah, just a little family getaway has been a nice recharge to kind of get us through to the rest of the year and really thinking more deeply myself about a more balanced life with more meditation and more mindfulness. I really want to carve out more time for quiet because I tend not to stop very much.
So yeah, that's kind of what's been going on with me.
Beautiful, beautiful summary. What was that term you used? Did you say neuroacoustics or something.
Oh. Yes, there's science around the frequency of sounds and music and how it can Actually it's quite interesting because there's a at the Recovery Lab here in Mornington there is a session called newcom and you hyphenalm and picture this harps. You said you've been in a hammock all day Tomorrow you can try this. Picture this a recliner armchair. If it's cool, they'll put a heated electric blanket under you.
You lie back with a weighted blanket on top. You put a light blocking set of very comfortable goggles on, and then you put headphones on that play music at frequencies and it moves between the two sides of the headphones. Put in left and right speakers and the I'm starting to look into the science of it. But the idea is that the frequency and that the sounds themselves can really lull you into a very grounded state.
In your nervous system.
It's incredibly relaxing and really a very nice way to kind of recalibrate. So yeah, So also that some of the research you're showing that if you listen to music at forty hurts that it can aid with learning motor skills as well as cognitively as well. So I'm at the tip of the iceberg with this reading that I've been doing.
But it's interesting, it's interesting.
I've opened that door a little bit too. So there's a thing called binaural beats. B I na you are al binaural beats and also white noise, brown noise, green noise. That yeah, all operate at those different hurts and frequencies. And it is funny, It's like, and you think, I think also with this, I could be wrong, but I think that different frequencies or hurts have a slightly different impact on different people. It's not every hurts range produces
the same response in different people. But I've got a bunch of stuff that I play at night when I go to bed, and it's all that. It's that white noise, it's that brown noise, it's that. Yeah, have you opened that door at all? Tip? The old you know, the calm, the farm music, the fucking the calm app.
Have I ever I used to listen to. I used to subscribe to a beautiful meditation that you put your noisecouncsling headphones on and the sound would move around your head. It was like to buy neural beats as well. Yes, you could hear somebody walking on leaves around your head. It was beautiful. Now, I listened to a yoga nidra before bed, and that just puts me straight to sleep.
You know. One of the interesting things to come out when I would sit with people. I sat with a new lady this morning. I won't say her name, shout out. She knows who she is. But sometimes I'll sit with someone and I go, all right, let's talk about what you want and don't want. So we go through this whole checklist of things in their life, you know, from house to car, to job, to relationships to you know.
But ultimately then we come back to the psychological and emotional and you might say spiritual depending on your You know, where you're at and what you think and what you believe. But so many people, apart from the basics of I want to be able to pay the bills and feed the kids, which is of course understandable, but beyond that, and this relates to you, doctor Jody of course, and all of us, but they just want to be calm, like they just don't want they don't want that inner turmoil.
It's like the thing that they want is really a conduit to to be calm, to be less stressed, to not be the overthinker, to not be agitated, to not be worried. And it's like when you go, well, what's the opposite of all of that shit? It's peace, you know, it's tranquility, it's calm. It's it's that you know, like we all apart from we want a few other things. Of course we want purpose and focus, but none of us, you know, don't want to have that internal state of joy and calm, do we?
I agree, And I think that we live a life.
I just had a conversation for my podcast this morning with a really interesting guest, and we were talking. She was talking about all the exit ramps that we have from disconnection. Sorry, all the exit ramps that we have was the raising shoes from connection with each.
Other and with ourselves.
And I was just thinking, literally, people can go from the very moment they wake and usually pick up their phone to the moment they go to bed, usually on the phone in bed, scrolling or whatever, and very little space for the brain to just rest for contemplation, for that calm in the nervouses and even in the car this morning.
Our daughter was on her phone.
She's limited to two hours a day, but she was in the car and I said, put it down.
We don't have to have the radio on.
We can just actually give our brains a little break, a little rest from the input.
And I don't know what.
Is that drives us all so furiously to feel every minute of every day, but that sense of calm is within reach for us if we know how. And before joining you here, I did a non sleep deep rest because I honestly could have just fallen asleep and had a nap. So I set my alarm because I feel super tired. Probably daylight savings. But there are tools that
we can use. We just need to prioritize it that we have access to that more than perhaps what we might realize, but we never stopped to use them because we feel like, oh, I got to keep going, there's no time. And the irony of it is that we are cut our lives shorter and we're missing out on actually enjoying the people around us and the things that we're doing because we're just always looking for, you know, what we need to tick off and move to next.
So yeah, it's definitely something I've been thinking about and talking to my eye rolling teenager.
Isn't that you sound like a mum, but it is so true. Like I'm I've become aware that I'm on my phone more than I should be. I need to be on my phone at times because of my work, but I'm on it way more than I need to be. You know, my intention every morning, unless I'm coaching someone or meeting with someone. But I get to the cafe at quarter past six, and you know, I fuck around
fifteen minutes. This is my plan. And then from kind of six thirty to seven thirty, just emails, planning, writing notes, you know, blah blah blah. But sometimes I look up and at seven thirty and I've been fucking around for an hour and a quarter. Like just the thing, too, is like, once the algorithm or whatever it is, understands what you pay attention to, I'm fucked because all it's got to do is just oh, look like with Tiff, all it is is, here's another puppy.
You know, baby'll get me a baby go for me.
It's like, oh, here's another motibike, brand new motibike who does a million miles an hour. You know, or whatever it is. But yeah, I've I've really had to. I've started to put my phone in the other room. And because even when I doing some things, but even now I'm aware, it's like it's here, it's upside down and it's turned off. But I I wish I had remembered before the thing to put it in the other room
because I'm better. I know that's done. But even if it's turned off and facing down, it still occupies three percent of my brain. Yeah, nowhere near me. Yeah, my focus is better go on, Yeah, totally.
And that that's I think.
I've heard Paul Taylor talk about this for about the research showing that if it's just oh Christie, doctor Christy Goodman, perhaps it was probably both. If it's even within our eyesight, eyeline, you know that it does, it does. It's got this pool. It's like this magnetic pool, and even if we're not picking it up, we can withstand that it is occupying a certain portion of our attention. And it's designed that way. And you know, I think about, oh my gosh, like
kids with phones and the algorithm. And one thing that I learned recently at a conference. I don't know whether or not you've heard this Tier four harps, but something like TikTok for example, you would think that the videos that you like, you know, you actually actively press the heart button on, would be the ones that the algorithm would say, yes, she likes this, he likes that, send more. In fact, the algorithm is designed to send you more of what you spend time on, even if you don't
actively engage with the post. And there's fascinating and quite terrifying research around eating disorders, for example, whereby if you in starting to get that kind of information in your feed, you might even get videos that are really unappealing, like they're hard to look at because there might be somebody who's extremely underweight, for example, but we tend to focus on those, and we might linger a little bit longer on a video like that, and that young women with
eating disorders are getting served up just a disproportionate amount of these kinds of videos.
And yet, like, intellectually we know that we're on our.
Phones and it's junk or it's just time wasting, but it's incredibly hard to actually go, oh, snap out of it, put it down and get on with something more meaningful. It's hard for us as adults, so it's near impossible for our teens so tough.
I've had this conversation with somebody who works in their space and there are actually influences in inverted commas who teach generally young girls, but we'll say young people how to essentially how to be anorexic and how to dress, how to get away with it, how to trick people to think that you're eating you know. Yeah, it's there's some there's some devastatingly toxic stuff, you know. At our disposal, I want to I want to ask both you a
hardish question. I'll start with you Jody, so tif this gives you a little bit of think time because it's the same question right now for you, doctor Jody, what is being courageous for you? What's the thing that you need to be courageous about that for you is scary, but you know you need to lean into it or step into it to whatever. What's the thing that scares you but you know you need to do it?
Oh well, I can't.
Anything that is big enough in my life to be scaring me at the moment. But I've been thinking about what do I need to introduce into my life that will scare me somewhat right, And I'm not practicing karate anymore, and that was that took courage and commitment to not only obviously stick to the training but also grade. And I have been in a couple of competition fights, which honestly, I'll try to see if I can dig out of video, Craig and send it to you.
I think I've said that to you before. I'll see if I can find one.
I'm kind of feeling at a point in my life where doing the things that require courage Now. I guess recently getting in a nice bath that was hard, but it's you know, it's just being comfortable. Sorry, it's not really been. It was just about tolerating the discomfort. I don't think that really required courage. Yeah, so you've really got me thinking, you know, I guess I need to show up more online. I need to spend more time kind of promoting I guess what I do that That
does make me feel anxious, but I do it. And I've got so many blocks on my social media on my phone during the day that it's a there's a lot of friction to even post a quick.
But yeah, you've you've asked a.
Question that I can't really answer, and not because I'm not willing, like I'm always willing to say.
You know, we've got some really.
Hard stuff going on at the moment with like Pete's mum has Alzheimer's and my my dad's in a world of pain, and there are very big challenges we're facing. But I don't I can't think of anything that's drawing on a huge amount of courage at the moment, and it's something I'd like to address.
So I'm not sure how.
Wow, maybe things are good. That's always good. What about you, Tippany and cook? Is there anything that brings to mind when I ask that?
Yeah, I think especially coming back and having some clarity about what I need to do and what I want to do and what's not working. It takes courage when you wake up each day and you realize you have to change the routine and the behaviors that you now know, Like it's because you know when you realize what's underneath, Like when for people like me, when you sit and actually realize why do I stay busy twenty four to seven? Like one of the things when I got to India,
one of the questions I thought of from nowhere? Is living alone really the best for me? Should I get out of my comfort zone and get a bigger apartment and just share it with another human because my social health probably requires some love.
But also you do have that baseball cap that says fuck.
Off, though exactly, I'll tell you know what.
I'll tell you. This feels funny, and like when I was in India, this took courage and I realized the significance of it afterwards. We shared some really deep stuff in our first night on the mountain with the other people. Everybody shared things they'd never shared I'd share. I shared things in full that I'd never shared with anyone as well, So we had a really big connection. A lot of
people on this show. No, my background is of childhood sexual abuse, so there's a lot of stuff there with men and trust and all of the things, and testing myself when I talked about that. And then I had one night in Delhi before Shannon flew back from the mountain and I was like, well, I can't I live the hotel. It was very scary, and Dellie and I went to the gym and I was chatting to this guy, this guy that lived in South Indian India and he
invited me to come for dinner. After we were chatting Brady, he goes, I'm going to go for dinner. Do you want? Do you want to come? And I said yes? And then I was like sitting in my room, going, You're in a country you don't know, that's terrifying, with more people in the whole place than there is in all of Australia. And You're going to go meet some stranger in the lobby who's going to take you to some place that he says he's going to take you. I'm like,
is this a good idea? No one knows where you are? And this is I put the story on Facebook because it was quite funny what happened, Like we got a bloody tire blowout in the you, but then we had to cature two trains to get there. And I'm thinking, am I like? Am I going to go to dinner? Am I going to be on the news next week?
But afterwards, the significance of trusting myself to judge the character of the man I just met and to set a boundary and to speak up and to be clear in what I was agreeing to was a really really courageous thing for me to do and it felt significant.
So yeah, awesome, awesome, And how did you so you didn't get chopped up and turned into a cast role, So that's good. I thought that that was ever going to happen. But how so how did you feel? Firstly, was it a good night?
Yeah? It was brilliant, Like we went to Old Deli and it was chaos, right, and I wouldn't have seen that. I wouldn't And I said to him, this was really I'm really glad I said yes to doing this. I would never have seen this at this time of night, and I never would have had that crazy funny story. And he was really polite and really accommodating and it was wonderful.
Yeah, that's great, that's great. How do you I mean, you two as it's a bit different for you, Jody because you're married, but you've both been through like navigating a big part of your life relationships. And I'm a dude, so I don't get it like a woman gets it, because you know, I don't have to assess risk in the way that you two have to assess risk. Right, how do you how did you navigate all of that? Jody? With figuring out who to trust and who not to trust,
and what to say yes to and know to. Is that, like, is that a real cognitive psychological thing or is that an instinctive or intuitive thing? What was that? What is that for you?
I mean, I was.
Reflecting a couple of days ago, how lucky I was. I didn't get myself into any real trouble as sort of a teenager or young adult going out and being very trusting, being very trusting, and not having any sense of listening to my gut or even perhaps noticing that my guts maybe telling me don't and then ignoring it. I started to become again like with karate, I started that when I was forty. That was when I first really started to think about, you know, my own gut
and listening to that, my own personal safety. I was terrified as a new driver at eighteen nineteen years of age, when the Paul Charles Daniel, the serial killer in Frankston was you know, taking women and killing them, and one of them died right near my high school. One of them died right near where I had netle training. It was all very close to home, so I had this sense of fear. But I didn't have this instinctive understanding about what my body could tell me about safety and danger.
And you know what you were saying before, Tiff, when you said you were like asking the question, and Craig you asked about courage. You know, I guess I went straight to, oh, courage has to be you know, something big. But it I think sometimes courage is just facing the world every day. It doesn't always have to be, you know, a raw It can be a little whisper sometimes just to say no or to do something that's a little bit out of your comfort zone. Anything like that can
take courage. So my answer before was kind of about the big things, but it does take courage to, like tif, when you're in a situation like that, to be invited somewhere and to be offered an opportunity and then to listen to that guard instinct and to say, actually, something about this does doesn't feel right.
I am always on alert. I am always with.
My head on a sivol when I'm walking to my car, you know, sometimes parked in multi story car parks in Melbourne. When I'm speaking at an event and I'm walking there on my own, I'm on high alert now and much more tuned in to myself. But you know, when my dad was in hospital recently after having a stroke and I was walking from the emergency department back to my car,
my brother was visiting. I said to him, gosh, it's a long dark walk for any nurses who are parked over here, and he said, I would have never thought of that.
It would never have.
Crossed my mind, the safety considerations, and so it's very front of.
Mine for me now.
But yeah, gosh, I put myself in some positions when I was younger that I could have been in trouble. But thankfully, you know, I'm not in a casserole somewhere either.
Thankfully, I think I love this conversation because I'm the same. I would think about it, but only because of I spend time with people like you two, right, But in my natural habitat, I would never think about it. It's like nearly every night in my life, many nights, probably three hundred nights a year, I go for a walk in the dark late and I go I walk in bare feet, and I walk around suburb and I have
headphones on. So if someone hock and let's not put any suggestions out there, but you know, it's like, I don't even think about it, and if I see someone walking towards me, I have no fear. I'm not saying that's because I'm a fucking legend. I'm not, you know, but I just don't whereas if I was, if I was, you know, a smaller, less strong female, I guess I would probably walk to the other side of the road
or maybe he fucking you know. But yeah, when you're a dude and you're big and kind of strong and whatever, yeah, we don't have to think about that, you know, And so it's such a different like doing the same thing as a different experience, right, TIV.
Yeah, you just made me think of I was walking home one day and I was just near my house and in the dark, and there was this person walking towards me and a bit wobbly and out of sorts, and you know when people look like, oh, this person looks under the influence on high alert. And from a distance, they looked up and was a female, and she smiled and she said hi or said something, and she had a physical some sort of a physical disability that was making her walk like that. And I felt like this
rush of two emotions. I felt really grateful that she, as a female, obviously knew it was dark and there was something odd about how she was walking and that would elicit fear in somebody else. And then I felt really kind of guilty at myself for judging someone who had to highlight that and have a disability and was thinking more of me than them, Like it was, Yeah, I.
Don't think I don't think you judged. I think that's just like your brain's job is to protect you, so your brain recognizes things, and it would have been you know, it could have been in nine out of ten, on nine turn out of twenty instances, someone kind of stumbling towards you would have meant something different. So there's no conscious nasty judgment in that. But another just will finish
this bit of the conversation. Anyway, if I'm walking in the dark and somebody's on the same side of the street walking towards me, and it's a female, I will cross the road so they don't feel scared. Or if I walk out my side gate, you know where that is tif right, If I walk out my side gate and somebody is two steps ahead of me as I walk out, and it's a lady I will not follow them. You know. It's like I'm heading left and they're walking left. They're two steps in front of me. I walk out
the gate. Now I'm fucking six feet behind them walking. I know that that's potentially fucking terrifying. So I'll walk to the other side of the road and head in the direction, but not near. I just I'm very you know,
I'm very aware of that. Like most of the people that I coach and mentor and most of our listeners and most of the people who come to my workshops, women, and so I just I have this, and I'm very grateful for my job because it's given me an insight and an awareness that I would, you know, if I was no disrespect to the plumbers, But if I was a plumber, I wouldn't have this, you know, this level of awareness that I have because of my job, although maybe maybe plumbers do, I don't know.
Yeah, I love that, Jody.
We're not going yet, but you and I are speaking at you and I are talking at a gig next week a what do we call it? Do we call it a collai? It's called a late and it's being run by no Elevate.
Isn't it no relate late relate but.
Good thing, good thing. I'm not in charge of pr Jody and I are talking at an event called Relate, which is being put on by eighty nine point nine l F in Melbourne's Positive Alternative and we're doing Tuesday night and Wednesday night at two different locations. And what's hilarious is one hundred years ago I used to do a morning show on light FM called the Grand Standards every Saturday with Jane O'Brien, the gorgeous Jon O'Brien for years.
Well I'm trying, By the way, do you know who Jan O'Brien is, either of you to I don't so lovely Jane fucking hell. I'll get back to the topic in the moment, but this is worth dtering. So Jane is an exercise physiologist. She's a gun, super smart. I don't say this lightly, one of my top ten favorite people in the world. And I know a lot of people and just the most beautiful, generous soul. And I can't talk too much or I get teary, but but oh I take a breath, so.
Thank your time.
I'm a big baby. So anyway, she had cystic fibrosis, which if you know anything about cystic fibrosis, it's not consistent with a long life. And she had a thing called bronchie extasis, which is worse right, And so her lung capacity was down to I think somewhere around thirty percent. And I will fuck this story up a little bit, but this is as well as I know it anyway. So we finished working together years ago. But after we finished working, she just got sicker and sicker to the
point where she needed a double lung transplant. Oh gosh, that was emotional, And isn't it funny how things I'm fucking like people I care about, oh, which I care about most people, doesn't take much. I'm a big fucking big baby anyway, So yes, we're coming.
Back to this. I'm a big baby. But finish what you were saying.
Yeah, no, no, I love crying on my own podcast. I didn't cry everyone. I almost cried, or I cried a little bit. But Jane was Jane ended up in hospital and intensive care needing a double lung transplant, on a waiting list, and it was not looking great and
she was pretty much at death's door. And I might fuck this bit up, so I might have to correct this in another episode, but my understanding is that she was very close to where they were about to switch everything off and say, you know, and her husband Pete, who also I love, who's also a beautiful human, he basically said, just give her another day or so, just give her another day or so. And that day, I think it was, I don't know, a few hours after he pleaded with the medical staff to give her a
little bit more time. She got some lungs, and she got some lungs, and so she's now ten months down the track, and she's very alive, still recovering, and still has a very, very whispery voice. I don't know how I started talking about Jane. I can't remember the origin story for this, but light FM. Oh that's right, thanks Tiff. So, yeah, we did Jane, and I had Jane and I had a show for a very long time. And it's like, you know, do you ever do Sometimes I'm a shit friend.
It's like I love people, but I feel like, because she had all this going on, so we were talking, talking, and then in the middle of all of it, and I feel like I wasn't the best friend and I meant to. I should have rung her a month or two ago. I haven't spoken her for a while, and I rang her last week and even ringing, I felt guilty to ring, but then I couldn't leave it any longer and I just started with I started with I'm a shit friend. I apologize. I love you, I'm shit.
You're a better human than me. Right But anyway, anyway, that was a story no one needed here. But thank god, literally, thank god she's on the mend and shout out to you Joanie and family. But anyway, so you and I are doing a gig for Light of FM. Tell everyone what it's about because it's free. I don't know if there are any tickets still available, but give us the snapshot.
Yeah, So Tuesday the fifteenth and Wednesday the sixteenth, they're the same event, essentially in two different locations. So one's in the east of Melbourne and one is in the west. And I don't have the exact details of the locations, but you'll find them on the website, which is eighty nine point nine the light dot com dot are you and yeah, it's they're free events for obviously you're speaking, I'm speaking, doctor Danny Cheer is speaking. He's a child
and an adolescent psychiatrist. But it's not a parenting event. It's an event, an event for people who want to come along and learn ideas and get strategies and have connection with people like us and each other who can help change, you know, how they're experiencing their mental health. And I'm going to be speaking about the science of happiness and wellbeing, so I'm not going to be talking about anxiety per se.
And yeah, they are magnificent events. I had the joy of speaking last year and gosh, we must have had about eight hundred odd people in the room. And the connection people have with each other as well as you know, with those of us that are lucky enough to have a chance to get the microphone, very very special. So yeah, free tickets. Need to reserve your seat by the website.
You know. I don't know if I should tell this story, but by the way, everyone, if you want to come along, go to the tickets are free, which is an amazing, an amazing opportunity. I think, not to see me, but see the other two will be good. I'm up the end. I've been put up the back, so you can leave after the first two if you want. But what was it going to say to.
You were going to tell a story that you said you didn't think you should tell. But I think that's every reason to tell it.
That's right. So there was a point in time, like I was working at Lighter FM, right, And it's not like I was the most I was probably not in some ways the best fit, but in some ways not the best fit because I'm me and it was it's now more a it's still a Christian based station, but it's fair to say that I wasn't the high water up. But how you know, a person of that faith should perhaps behave And I think what happened was I could
be wrong. I think they discovered I'd written a book with fuck on the front, and I think I think they well, I think they knew that, but I think they started to get feedback from some of the listeners and not my listeners, but just some of the people that knew, Oh, they've got this guy on the show on the station that has written a book called Stop Fucking Around, and this is meant to be so yeah. I So we had a bit of a chat and I went listen, it's probably it's best for you and
best for me. And then I got a phone call a month ago from MJ. Want who's is the program director, isn't he?
I think of listener engagement there he.
Is, and he's like, mate, we would love you to come and speak at this light event. I go, well, you know, I say fuck right, and he's like he laughed, and he goes, yeah, we're well aware. I go, you know that, And I think I think he was saying something that they're they've evolved a little bit. There are probably a little bit more, you know, So I'll try to keep the fucks to a minimum next Tuesday and Wednesday. Jodie is my long winded kind of message.
Yeah, now look at you know when I when they started, we were talking about them producing my podcast.
We had lots of chats m J.
And me, and we you know, he said, you know that the station has listeners who are you know, there for the Christian content and you know, you know, really clear on their faith. There are those that are searching and looking for something more. And there are others that aren't Christian and not interested, but looking for you know, positive and uplifting is the branding of course, and and that's what it is.
So yeah, so it's really it's really good.
They MJ listened to every single one of my podcast episodes before inviting me to become part of the Light family. As we say, so good thing that I kept it clean all along, or they wouldn't have probably want.
To be on board.
Yeah, no, they do do a good job. And like, I've worked in a bunch of radio stations. And what was interesting was I was working at SEN, which is obviously a commercial station at the same time, and the facilities and studios and resources at that time at light FM was significantly better than SEN. And light FM is a community station that is run like a commercial station in terms of like the way like their production, their facilities and resources. It's yeah, it's it's world class. It's
run like I mean, I've worked at Gold FM. I've worked at a bunch of stations. It's literally just like working into a walking into a high level commercial station. So they must be doing something right. All right, let's head down the home straight. Where do people start in this? I mean, I know there's no three step plan, but maybe from both of you, this kind of idea of how do I, how do I better manage me? How
do I better self regulate? TIF do you have any insights into this, like, how do I that idea of equanimity? How do I be the calm in the chaos, because there's always going to be chaos around us at times. None of us are going to be living in a cave on a mat, you know. So you moving forward? Do you have a plan now that you're back from this kind of somewhat philosophical spiritual experience or are you just going with the.
Flow a little bit of both.
Really, we spent one thing we spent a lot of time on there before hitting the mountain, which said a lot of intentions was workshopping our identity, our kind of I am statement, who am I? And what sound like wanky terms, but our mission and purpose. But when you actually sit down and really drill down on that, you learn a lot about yourself. And I just feel like the world is different to me now because I was experiencing it through this foggy lens of not really recognizing
what values were driving me. And so when I, I should say, when I can recognize that now other people's actions or experiences or the people around me, I feel like I'm responding differently to the more I'm not responding to them because I'm just clear on what matters to me and I'm looking at that and not all the other stuff, if that makes sense.
Yeah.
Yeah, it's interesting. That's simple and somewhat wanky stuff, you know, to go, oh, we're going to go on, We're going to our mission and purpose, but it's like it it matters. Yeah.
Yeah. Well, also the idea of kind of stepping out of the unconsciousness of your life, you know, where like life happens anyway, right, I mean, life just goes on and then you look up and you go, oh fuck, and now I'm fifty shit shit, and it's it's and that's not really anybody's goal is to have that Oh fuck,
I'm fifty and this wasn't my plan. Yeah, but is to start to whatever this means for the individual, live more alignce, live more consciously, genuinely even in the busyness, and mayhem, to be more aware you know, what about you, doc, what about you?
Yeah? Very much aligned with what you were saying, Tiff. I've been that there's a concept in acceptance and commitment therapy called the choice point, and that.
You know, multiple times, dozens of times during.
The day, we've got this opportunity to consider whether or not something's taking us towards what's really important to us, our values, which is exactly what you were talking about tif or Away, And I am I've just got that awareness about the choice point kind of more top of mind at the moment. And so, like a small example, like I love chocolate, all right, I love it, and but I buy.
A Fredo frog because there is an end to that.
It's only like thirty five grams or something, so I can indulge, but I'm not eating a whole block of Cabri dairy milk.
Do you know you're just talking to a version of you.
You know you can get giant fretdo's too, and they taste better.
Well, they're giant Frettos that I'm buying to, you know, Like they're the ones that I buy. But just for example, like yesterday they're on sale at Woollies, Like they're overpriced for what they are, but they were a dollar each.
I'm like, I'm going to buy two, put one in the in the drawer, and when I ate one yesterday, I don't normally I usually have like one one a week or something, but I thought I want, oh, I want to eat that other fredo the minute I'd finished the first and then this choice point came into my mind. I'm like, no, well, I mean be cause I'm fifty, I'm on the other side of I mean, I'm through menopause.
My I'm still crossfitting, but my body shape is changing, my body fat levels are higher than they've ever been, you know for me. And I'm conscious of these things, and i want my health, i want my strength, i want my vitality for the next fifty and so I'm like, choice point, Okay, towards are away. Okay, eating that second fretto is definitely away. If I was a party, If I was at a party, it would be towards. So context matters. But I'm keeping in mind this idea that
you know, it's hard. It takes effort to do good by ourselves, it really does. And I'm trying to listen and then and then when that resistance comes up, because we will go to a concert tonight, we'll be home really late, I've got CrossFit booked in the morning. There will be resistance, but I will go because it's important. And so, yeah, this choice point is something that I'm I'm really keeping in mind. It's simple and it's quite powerful. We just have to listen when we get our answer.
So but before just sorry, I'm so sorry to interruptive Craig. Before we finish our recording today. This is something that I just wanted to just quickly mention. So can we just make sure we save a little just a minute or two for something I just want to share towards the end.
Sure, Okay, thanks, Sorry, Tiff, go go, That's all right.
I was just going to say I wrote the first day I came back. I wrote on my whiteboard, which is in front of me. Now, will I do what's required today to be I want to be tomorrow? And then I've got I'll show you three post it notes. I've got one that just say will I. I've got one on my bathroom mirror, one on the inside of my front door that I see when I leave the house, and one on the fridge.
And in my head all day.
I'm like, will I will I will. I'm doing five minute meditations twice a day just to stop and pause. It's like, am I going to let my heart rate go back up thirteen beats a minute till it's usual? Or am I going to keep it to the thirteen beats a minute lower resting heart rate I had from being in India. Do you know, like it's so yeah, I found that a really a good practice for me.
That's quite an amazing You know what I love about that?
That?
Well, I love about your new regime in the house and your post it notes, but I love that there is a measurable outcome. Like the thing with psychology and the motions and stuff, it's kind of hard to measure, right because it's you know, it's very subjective, but heart rate is not subjective. It's like it's a number. Yeah, it's a number of beats in a minute. And I mean thirteen beats lower on average is a fucking lot.
That is substantious lower than it's ever been. It's sitting.
It wasn't back, and it.
Wasn't it was it normally sits high fifties to low sixties, so probably fifty eight to sixty one. I got home and it's been sitting on it was forty seven, forty seven and those last few nights, I'm having a glass of wine with dinner. Now, if I have wine before bed would normally raise my heart rate overnight, So I'm doing all that, but what it tells me is that hole that's switching off, that presence and that social aspect to my life. And it's like, well, there's your answer.
There's where you need to do the work.
You know.
What's like almost ironic here is that you want to desperately hold on to that, but without the desperation. Yeah, because the desperation desperate, Yeah, the desperation will fuck.
It up, right, Yeah, yeah, hold it lightly, Hold it lightly.
It's been a really interesting chat you too, doctor Jodie. Before we go, you wanted to share something, so now would be then I wanted.
To just in terms of what you were saying earlier about the lung transplant. Tiff and I had the joy of speaking at a VIC poll women's well being day and we also got to listen to somebody to speak about organ donation and I learned a lot and I thought this was this would be, you know, a nice opportunity to kind of just touch on that, to let people know that we can, we have to opt into organ donation, but our family members have the final say on the day that that question might be asked. And
I learned this incredible. I won't know, I won't recall the numbers. Maybe tif we'll remember more clearly. But for your organs to be donated, you need to die in hospital in the intensive care unit, where you're breathing and
your heart are already kind of really being supported. And because the circumstances under which organs can be donated is so specific, out of tens of thousands of people who said yes to it, only about fifteen hundred people can donate organs in the end, at the end of the day because of that, and there are people's lives who are just absolutely changed and transformed as a result. So I thought, yeah, since you mentioned it earlier, I thought, probably, you know, not something we like.
To think about.
But we're all, you know, walking each other home, as my guest said this morning on in our conversation, and the day will come for all of us, and I think it's important for us to all think about and let our family know what our wants are, what our desires are around that wow.
And know what our families and see it as a legacy. I remember when we listened to John speak on that the legacy of him being able to gift that life to people has given him something that helps with the grief of what he lost.
You're exactly right because you interviewed him, didn't you, Tiff, So you're exactly right because it was with his wife, wasn't it that he said, yes, and I think her kidney went to a little boy.
And I'm going to get all.
Choked up, but yeah, it's very personal, it's very difficult. But yeah, we should let our families know because at the end of the day, they are the ones that get the final say.
Even if we've registered and ticked all the boxes, it's up to them.
So yeah, so thank thanks Harps for the chance to just raise that here.
I must do it on my own podcast as well.
It's important, pleasure, it's a great message. I saw a video the other day on when I shouldn't have been scrolling but fuck it, And there was this dad. He was probably my age, maybe a bit younger, and his son had passed away. His son was in his twenties and then he meant went and met the recipient who had gotten his son's heart. Oh my god. And they that organized this get together and they put a stethoscope on the dad so he could listen to the son's heart. Wow. Yeah,
that was it. That was it. I was out. I'm like, fuck, why did I It's like, you know those things that are beautiful. It's like I'm glad I'm watching this, but now I'm fucked for the next three minutes. Yeah anyway, Yeah, Dr Jody, How do people find you? What's your show called? Where can they connect with you? What's your web address? Sell us a book or two? Ready set, no pressure, go.
Just if you go to my website. Dr Jodi Richson dot com dot au Jody with an eye. But I love how you say the name of my podcast halps, go for it.
You know what to do?
Well?
Her podcast is called well Hello Anxiety. You need to use me. You need to use me in your PRIMI I do, I.
Do, I do.
I've got lots of ideas about some updates. So yeah, I'll keep that in mind.
Well, we appreciate you, Tiff. Keep riding that bloody zen train without the anxiety. Don't hold on to it desperately, hold on to it lightly. Just between your your pinky finger and whatever the one next to it's called maybe your pinky finger and your thumb. Yeah, just that, yeah, like that? Like that? Perfect?
All right?
Everyone, love your guts. Thank you, Thanks Tiff, Thanks Jody, Thanks guys.
Bye,