Episode description
Episode description
For centuries, religious relics have been the only means by which devout followers could interact with the divine. Let us journey into some of the gross holy relics. The bones of saints, the milk of the virgin Mary, perhaps a little finger of St Thomas.
St Francis Xavier’s toes were a big hit too. This saint died of exhaustion in 1552 after converting communities across Asia and leaving myriad churches in his wake. One devoted woman visiting his corpse bent to kiss his foot, bit off his toe and took it back to Portugal to display it in her own chapel.
Cuz that’s normal.
Even the nipples of a pious Hungarian princess became the subject of pilgrimages. Elizabeth of Thuringia devoted her life to helping the poor and died all too young at the hands of her brutal caretaker. It seems a tragic death makes one even more holy because mobs of Catholics couldn’t get enough of her. Just one strand of hair, a fingernail, perhaps a nibble of a nipple?
But why stop at blood, toes and nipples?
What about something even more precious? Like Jesus Christ’s foreskin.
The holy prepuce. The divine turtleneck. Now that’s a relic that would put a ring around your head.
Legend has it that Jesus’ foreskin has been responsible for perfumed mists, freak storms and the rings of Saturn. One account suggested that rubbing it upon the eyelids of the blind could make them see. So, foresight?
Now, JC’s circumcision was mentioned in the Bible and it’s depicted in numerous famous paintings, but no one talked about what happened to the offcuts. Many churches throughout Europe have claimed to be in ownership of the holy foreskin… but where is it really?
Like art travelling between galleries, early reports trace JC’s tip from a Byzantine Empress to King Charlemagne to Pope Leo III. They say it went from Rome to England and back to Rome again, found in Calcata in 1557. It was hidden in the cell of a captured German soldier who flogged it during the sacking of Rome. So sneaky.
By the way, we know this particular foreskin actually belonged to JC himself because Saint Bridget of Sweden had a vision of the Virgin Mary in the late fourteenth century who told her it was. Solid evidence.
Now, as time moved forward, science became more popular and the church became a tad self-conscious about JC’s private parts. Under pressure to banish Catholic practices that could be seen as culturally backward, the Vatican issued a decree in 1900 threatening ex-communication to anyone who wrote about the holy foreskin. Harsh but fair.
But then in the 1960s, a bunch of hippies made a big deal about it again. The turtleneck was back in fashion!
Calcata’s local priest, Father Dario Magnoni took to storing the holy bangle in a box under his bed or in the back of his wardrobe. Hmmm.
But then, before the Feast of the Holy Circumcision in 1983 (it was a kinda big deal back then), Father Magnoni discovered it was GONE.
No one wanted to talk about it. People in the village were upset. Rumours were rampant.
Did the Vatican steal Jesus’ foreskin so people would shut up about the Saviour’s penis?
What TF happened to the holy turtleneck?
SOURCES:
The World’s Grossest Catholic Relics
https://historycollection.com/worlds-grossest-catholic-relics/16/
NOTE – the pictures Rod showed Will came from here
The Holy Foreskin: Where is the Last Piece of the Body of Christ?
https://www.historicmysteries.com/holy-foreskin/
Whatever Happened To Jesus Christ's Foreskin?
https://www.wired.com/2006/12/whatever-happen/
How Jesus' foreskin became one of Christianity's most-coveted relics — and then disappeared
The Holy Prepuce: A Lesser Known Relic of Jesus Christ
https://ucatholic.com/blog/the-holy-prepuce-a-lesser-known-relic-of-jesus-christ/
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