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The Tim Hawkins Podcast

The Tim Hawkins Podcastevergreenpodcasts.com
The Tim Hawkins Podcast is the brainchild of comedian Tim Hawkins. Listen as Tim talks about any number of topics with fellow comedians, friends and sometimes, random passersby.
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Episodes

S1 Ep76: Bob Smiley - Donkeys, Salads and Hallmark Movies

Bob Smiley takes a break from eating squirrel to go out on the road with us! This week, Tim has a solid salad. Caleb wonders if Missouri, as a state, uses too much ranch dressing. Bob gets kicked out of a cut-rate Bowling Hall of Fame. And Freight is PUMPED for some Hallmark Christmas movies. Also in this episode: Bob and Tim bleed on stage. Caleb dry heaves while looking at a bowler’s thumb. Freight tells a story about Stan the Donkey whilst sitting atop his throne. Bob runs down the list of th...

Nov 09, 20171 hr 28 minSeason 1Ep. 76

S1 Ep75: John Branyan - Driftwood, Hobos and Cat Witter

John Branyan is in the house! This week, nobody can hear, and everybody wants reverb. The gang talks fighting. Baby Josh has trouble speaking. Freight has a condition where nobody wants to listen to him. Caleb fields a bunch of questions from Twitter. And there might be a flame thrower outside the bus. Also in this episode: Caleb wants to know what autumn in the park smells like. Tim fears the combover. Freight wants to look like a full on hobo. John does more Freight introductions. And we witne...

Oct 26, 20171 hr 15 minSeason 1Ep. 75

S1 Ep74: Dustin Nickerson - Thieves, Thongs and Trafts

The awesome Dustin Nickerson hops on the bus! This week, Tim tells a completely erroneous fun facts about Freight. Caleb starts a dialog about the dress code on the bus. Dustin kneels at the sight of Tim’s American Flag pants. Josh’s adulthood status is questioned. And Freight wants to gently rock Dustin like a baby. Also in this episode: Tim wants to journal but doesn’t. Joke thieves steal one of Tim’s jokes. Tim steals one of Bob Smiley’s jokes. Dustin steals one of Pete Holmes jokes, and imme...

Oct 19, 20171 hr 28 minSeason 1Ep. 74

S1 Ep73: John Crist (Audio) - Boxing, Jingles and Nabbers

John’s back!! This week, John gets in a boxing match. Tim almost catches a fly. Josh kills a moth with the unopened Jonnie W DVD. Crappaw gets a nifty nabber and goes on Shark Tank. Freight drops a fair trade, organic FREIGHTBACK! Also on this episode: The Breville almost becomes a tool of ultimate bug destruction. The show almost doesn’t go on when the power goes out. Tim writes a Freightback jingle. Caleb has serious geographical deficiencies. The moth calls into the show. And John over analyz...

Oct 12, 20171 hr 33 minSeason 1Ep. 73

S1 Ep72: John Crist - Bits, Stamps and Toe Shoes

John Crist tweeted his snapchat to our instagram, and HE’S ON THE BUS!!! This week, Tim dreams of the day he goes to buy stamps. John thinks that going outside is the worst thing ever. Caleb wonders if Biebs is the most famous person of all time. And Freight asks for strength when Tim cancels a show. Also on this episode: Tim runs in toe shoes and locks up his shins. Freight finds a woof under the stairs. John has defiant hair and does things to his body. (What?) Caleb can’t do anything halfway....

Sep 28, 20171 hr 20 minSeason 1Ep. 72

S1 Ep71: Jonnie W - Cinderella, Stem Cells & Bungie Jumping

HEY-OOO, WE’RE BACK! Jonnie Boy is with us on this fantabulous run. This week, Tim talks about his first kiss. Jonnie knows too much about Cinderella. Caleb thinks that helicopters are waaaaayyyy doper that simulcasting. And Freight talks to truckers. Also in this episode: The gang talks about being polite. Caleb wants the squad to to wear matching sunglasses at all times. Freight calls Jonnie an anchor. Tim bungie jumps on his honeymoon. And Jonnie wants to injure himself so he can look like Ry...

Sep 21, 20171 hr 41 minSeason 1Ep. 71

S1 Ep70: John Branyan - Books, Hotdogs and Freight Intros

John Branyan is wheels up with us! This week, Tim massacres a cheese stick. Josh is only happy when it’s 60 degrees. John starts a fire at his merch table. Coach tells a risque joke; then explains it. And Freight beatboxes while Tim scowls at Caleb. Also in this episode: The gang writes an uncomfortable jingle about Freight being racist. We get about a million bathroom related questions on Twitter… What’s up with you weirdos? John tells an embarrassing story about pants. And Tim tries to drive w...

Aug 17, 20171 hr 26 minSeason 1Ep. 70

S1 Ep69: The Crew - Bologna, Stairmasters and Clydesdales

It’s da crew, baby! Wassadoo? This week, Tim has flashbacks to his time as an Olive Garden waiter. Caleb has another encounter with the dancing excerciser at his gym. Freight sits in an adirondack chair. AND SPOILED RICH KID CALLS IN!!! Also in this episode: Tim runs over Freight’s family photos with a lawnmower. Caleb and Tim relive their ill-fated radio show. Josh and Caleb talk about Pop-Tarts and Gushers Fruit Snacks. Olivia joins us for travel talk. And Tim gets emotional talking about the ...

Aug 10, 20171 hr 32 minSeason 1Ep. 69

S1 Ep68: Ambrose Blair - Nachos, Hairspray and Scattergories

Gather ‘round, folks… today we get to meet Ambrose Blair, an awesome kid who wished to be on the podcast! This week, Caleb gets uncomfortable while flexing for everyone. Ambrose put Taco Bell on BLAST!!! Freight has is own Wikipedia page?!?! And Tim sneaks into everyone’s houses and eats their lozenges. Also in this episode: Tim gets hairspray in his mouth. Caleb’s girlfriend, Rachel, joins us on the podcast and watches Kardashians with Tim. Ambrose keeps his cat in an oxygen chamber. The gang h...

Aug 03, 201759 minSeason 1Ep. 68

S1 Ep67: Bob Smiley - Candles, Mums and Chamberpots

Bob is mixing condiments on the bus with us! This week, Freight proclaims his love for scented candles. Freight and his groomsmen make a shirtless pyramid. Caleb wonders what a chamberpot is. And Bob melts down meeting one of his comedy heroes. Also on this episode: Caleb’s shirts get smaller as he gets swoller. Freight contemplates his favorite cheese. The gang talks formalwear. Tim remembers when women smelled bad at weddings. Tim and Freight talk about texting. And a TV show gives Bob comedy ...

Jul 27, 20171 hr 38 minSeason 1Ep. 67

S1 Ep66: 066 - John Branyan - Jellies, Cow Chips and Monopoly

John Branyan is rolling on the Poddy Bus with us! This week, Caleb creates a spiritual metaphor with peanut butter. Branyan doesn’t like the way his hands smell. The gang fights about Wheat Thins. Reggie the Pocket Elf swings by again. And Tim comes to the revelation that all of the food at Cracker Barrel is made of only one ingredient. Also on this episode: Branyan catches pickles in a rain barrel. Freight throws oily food in the trash. Tim gets a questionable haircut. Caleb asks a question and...

Jul 20, 20171 hr 48 minSeason 1Ep. 66

S1 Ep65: 065 - Bobby and the Crew - Bathrooms, Golf Balls and Potato Juice

Tim’s buddy, Bobby Meyers, is hanging out with crew! This week, Caleb just can’t stop gettin’ them gains. Tim accidentally uses a co-ed bathroom. Bobby juices a potato and goes back in time. One of the bunks on the bus gets filled with bananas. And Tim answers your vacation questions from Twitter. Also on this episode: George Washington does crossfit. Bobby burns a couch in his backyard. Tim puts a basketball playing pastor on blast. The gang looks at each others calf muscles. We hear more of Ca...

Jul 13, 20171 hr 44 minSeason 1Ep. 65

S1 Ep64: 064 - The Crew - Donuts, Dating and Summer Man

We’re back in the mancave! This week, we learn why Josh wants to be a sour cream donut. Tim tentatively tunes the television to ten tenors. Freight goes to the public pool after dark. Caleb has hot takes on Ikea and Olive Garden. And Summer Man swings by the show. Also in this episode: Get into Caleb’s head as he shops at Whole Foods. Tim is shocked to learn the Chuck E. Cheese is still in business. Caleb wants to ask Luke Bryan some pointed questions. The gang uncomfortably discusses the word “...

Jun 22, 20171 hr 7 minSeason 1Ep. 64

S1 Ep63: 063 - The Crew - Wontons, Hockey & Freight’s Thighs

The crew crashed Tim’s house! This week, Caleb’s arms are getting huge! Tim thinks way too hard about baby teeth. Josh wonders if Elton John and Billy Joel are the same person. And Freight has impressive thighs. Also on this episode: Tim gives Caleb some ground rules for using the sauna. The gang talks greatest guitar player of all time. A Russian Lady keeps burping Italian Sausage. Tim finds frozen wontons in the mancave. And Freight wants a talking prairie dog to help him out on the road. Lear...

Jun 15, 20171 hr 23 minSeason 1Ep. 63

S1 Ep62: 062 - Bob Smiley - Germs, Elves & Buckets of Fish

Bob Smiley is rollin’ along on the Poddy Bus! This week, Tim doesn’t know what data is. Freight chimes in with an early and epic Freightback. Caleb is afraid of bathroom germs. The gang gets in a kerfuffle over hand washing. We meet Tim’s “special helper”, Reggie the Pocket Elf. And Smiley is trying to find a date on “Buckets of Fish”. Also on this episode: Tim accidentally changes a word in a joke and bombs. Bob sleeps in a kitchen and showers in the mop sink. Caleb wonders how much protein the...

Jun 08, 20171 hr 31 minSeason 1Ep. 62

S1 Ep61: 061 AUDIO - Kenn Kington - Belts, Breakdowns and Brosaken

It’s time for another VIDEO EPISODE!!! This week, Kenn Kington gets stuck on a pony ride. Freight walks through fire. Tim traps a former bus driver in one of the luggage bays. Caleb has an irrational fear. And the gang talks about their favorite scars, and their worst pain ever. Also in this episode: What constitutes a “Bro-Move”. Tim weighs in on what makes the perfect belt. New crew member, Alex, gets a nickname after being trapped in the shower. Josh thinks that Corn Nuts are a breakfast cere...

May 30, 20171 hr 23 minSeason 1Ep. 61

S1 Ep60: 060 - John Crist - Videos, Cupcakes and Bad Words

John Crist is back for our 60th episode! This week, Freight seductively invites you to make ketchup with him. John can’t find his headphones. Becky gives Tim a micro drone. (Thanks, Becky!) The gang needs a Freightback explained to them. And a rampant case of Christian-ese breaks out on the bus. Also on this episode: Tim almost suffocates watching a YouTube video. Caleb gags at the thought of wet cupcakes. John gets his mouth washed out with soap. The gang discusses restaurant hygiene. And Tim w...

May 11, 20171 hr 21 minSeason 1Ep. 60

S1 Ep59: 059 - Jonnie W - Hugs, Pizza, and Woofs

Jonnie W is riding on the Poddy Bus! This week, Tim gets pizza, but not the pizza he wants. Glade calls into the show. Freight calls out Chick-Fil-A’s green apple problem. The fire alarm goes off during the show. And Jonnie recalls the first time he ever hugged Tim. Also on this episode: The gang talks nicknames for your significant other. Freight gets an amazing gift. Tim gets a Yeti Cooler. We take questions from our tweeps. Tim’s mom, Nelda calls into the show. And Freight says “dope”. Learn ...

May 04, 20171 hr 49 minSeason 1Ep. 59

S1 Ep58: 058 - John Branyan - Dummies, Supplements and Comfy Pants

John is hanging out on our “standard-sized” bus. This week, Heather wants Tim to un-condition the air. Caleb never knows when to stop taking supplements. John is upset that the podcast never starts on time. And Freight is buried under a mountain of Poddy Break Loot. Also in this episode: The music shop in Mr. Roger’s neighborhood is a front. Tim imagines a ventriloquist funeral. Caleb doesn’t have time to worry about artificial intelligence. John is afraid of being mauled by squirrels. And Freig...

Apr 27, 20171 hr 15 minSeason 1Ep. 58

S1 Ep57: 057 - John Crist - Wintergreen, Bunnies and FreightFacts

Now for Part 2 with John Crist! This week, Tim wants to roast a pocket-sized Freight. The gang wants to take a survival class because nobody knows how to start a fire. Caleb sees a spider and moves out. Freight needs a perch to sit atop at shows. And Tim wants to join PETA. Also in this episode: Freight spills the mints. John takes up rollerblading. A squirrel gets an Uber. Caleb has an awkward interaction with a girl he likes. John sells a kidney to go to a Taylor Swift concert. And we get a sp...

Apr 20, 20171 hr 19 minSeason 1Ep. 57

S1 Ep56: 056 - John Crist - Acting, Q’waves and Freight Fists

John Crist is rolling with us on the bus! This week, Tim teaches a masterclass on Keurig use. John thinks that actors aren’t being real enough. Caleb gets hit with a Freight Fist. And a very young Tim brings down the house with an inappropriate accent. Also in this episode: Tim and John talk about first gigs and worst gigs. Freight reveals his alter ego, Earthquake McGoon. John chooses Dunkin Donuts over Krispy Kreme. Tim throws shade at paninis. John quotes a verse from one of the testaments. A...

Apr 13, 20171 hr 12 minSeason 1Ep. 56

S1 Ep55: 055 - Dustin Nickerson - Pill Bugs, Fighter Jets and Baby Puke

Dustin Nickerson jumps on the bus! This week, Tim’s son smelled and nobody knew why. Dustin’s youngest puts an insect in his head. Caleb doesn’t know how tall he is. Freight talks about head transplants. And Dustin can’t open the doors on the bus. Also on this episode: Caleb takes a personality test. Freight asks a logistical question. Dustin and Caleb play some b-ball outside of the church. Tim changes some lyrics so the Beatles can lead worship. And Dustin receives his first Freightback! Take ...

Apr 06, 20171 hr 43 minSeason 1Ep. 55

S1 Ep54: 054 - Jonnie W - Insulation, CrossFit and Glowing Pigs

We’re back for our second video episode!! Tim IMMEDIATELY needs to turn the lights down. Jonnie wears aquasocks in public. Caleb dares the gang to eat fiberglass insulation. Freight weighs in on the Angry Birds movie. And the gang talks vehicular salutes. Also in this episode: Caleb discovers Christian parody t-shirts. Jonnie is afraid of radioactive boars. The gang calls Jean, our event manager, on the phone. Freight gets a can of boiled nuts in his hotel room. Tim walks through a graveyard. An...

Mar 30, 20171 hr 44 minSeason 1Ep. 54

S1 Ep53: 053 - The Crew - Plivates, Ultraman, and Cannibals

It’s the Crew + Olivia!! ALSO OUR FIRST VIDEO EPISODE!!! The crew kicks off with Underwear Talk. Spoiled Rich Kid’s sister, Veronica stops by. Tim locates an elusive 12 - Wait - BOOM! Caleb and Josh get exposed to the horrors of 70’s kids shows. And Freight issues an executive order. Also in this episode: Veronica reveals some scandalous news about Gliffrey. Tim tasks his youngest child with creating a spotify playlist of alcohol songs. Baby Caleb goes to see Uncle Tim sing karaoke. Tim breaks d...

Mar 23, 20171 hr 21 minSeason 1Ep. 53

S1 Ep52: 052 - Jonnie W – Moths, Al-Froids and Night Terrors

Jonnie DubDubs is back for some more Poddy Break. This week, Tim gets moth guts on his hands. Jonnie and Tim have “Eagle Talk”. The gang is apparently putting everyone to sleep. Freight gets all jacked on steroids. And Caleb eats pizza on a hotel towel. Also on this episode: Jonnie falls out of his bunk. Marty the Moth calls into the podcast. Bob Smiley is an unwitting participant in our newest segment. Freight wants to clip a carabiner to Jonnie’s underwear. Caleb barely lives through a technic...

Mar 09, 20171 hr 54 minSeason 1Ep. 52

S1 Ep51: 051 - Todd Hawkins - Backhands, Plantains and Dalfreightions

Tim’s brother, Todd, is hanging with us in the Sprinter Van! Tim gets assaulted by a pungent glue. Freight wants to know what La La Land is. Caleb gets knocked off his longboard by a supernatural force. Pooz throws shade at Todd over some candy cigarettes. And Freight retrieves a water bottle for Tim at the strangest time. Also on this episode: Tim almost crashes on his Segway. Freight wears a speedo in Dubai. Caleb reminisces about the war with the Asians. How do they make plantain chips? Did T...

Mar 02, 20171 hr 36 minSeason 1Ep. 51

S1 Ep50: 050 - The Crew - Slinkys, Trolls and Buttered Freight

The gang is cruising through Sunny California in the Sprinter Van!! This week, Freight gets sick and barfs. Tim speaks Russian. Caleb and Tim delve further into the Gooby Goober voice. Trump talks about Weebles. Josh asks a riveting question about Slinkys. And Caleb crushes some animal style fries. Also on this episode: Josh visits Velveeta, CA. A wall falls on an unsuspecting Freight. The gang has burger talk. What fruit would Freight dip in ranch dressing? Caleb gets a job as a hay hut troll. ...

Feb 23, 20171 hr 35 minSeason 1Ep. 50

S1 Ep49: 049 - John Crist - Anthems, Jerky and Freight Films

Heyooo, John Crist is CRUSHING IT on the podcast! This week, Luke Bryan sings the National Anthem. Tim says the word "orange". Josh tells a Valentine's Day story. Freight stares at a basket of crackers. John wonders if sharks are gluten intolerant. And everyone chews deer jerky directly into their microphones! Also on this episode: We discuss your #Freightvrite movies. Caleb isn't very handy, but makes up for it with his beard. Who's Kim Yon Goon? Get yourself a Freight stake. Are guys intimidat...

Feb 16, 20171 hr 41 minSeason 1Ep. 49

S1 Ep48: 048 - Jonnie W - Crappaw, Tattoos and Velveeta

Heeeere’s Jonnie W. And also, Crappaw, Luke Bryan, Ikea Man, and Tim, and Caleb, and Freight, and Aaron… SO MANY PEOPLE!! Tim and Caleb talk tattoos. Tim finds the correlation between prison ministry and Chuck E. Cheese. Freight throws a water bottle. Jonnie channels Hannibal Lecter. And Aaron beheads a block of Velveeta. Also on this episode: The gang opens gifts from Poddy Break fans! Crappaw gets new tennis balls. Ikea man gets some olives. Jonnie shows his biblical knowledge. Freight doesn’t...

Feb 09, 20171 hr 26 minSeason 1Ep. 48

S1 Ep47: 047 - Jonnie W - Ant Farms, Lazy Susans and Jello

Jonnie is ready to roll on the Poddy Bus! This week, Tim brings a Trump prophecy before the group. Caleb has a Freight-sperience at Home Depot. Jonnie has a feud with Jon Bon Jovi. And Freight hauls booty around the building to give some fans a photo op. Also on this episode: Jonnie eats all the bacon. Tim lives the thug life. Caleb can’t complete a drug test. Freight challenges Madonna to a wrestling match. Jonnie accidentally shaves his body. And the gang Freightbacks historical figures. Get y...

Feb 02, 20171 hr 9 minSeason 1Ep. 47
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