Hello , my dear passengers , and welcome aboard the Self-Growth Train , a podcast that combines personal stories , opinions and research in order to better guide you through your self-growth journey . My name is Frances Marie Rera Pacheco and I am your tour guide . First , I want to say thank you for tuning back into the podcast .
Some of you guys have been wondering and questioning me whether I'm going to be having guests on the podcast once again with this relaunch , and yes , the answer is yes , yes , yes , I will be having guests once again . The only thing is it's going to take me a couple of months , but you know what ?
That's okay , because when I first started the podcast , I did it all by myself . Until one day I was like wouldn't it be cool to invite somebody new every week ? And then it happened . So , just letting you know yes , guests will be back . It's just going to take a couple of months before that starts again .
Well , my dear passenger , the time has come to put on our seat belts as we dive into our first stop . Today's topic , and the topic for today , is obstacles . Obstacles are defined by the Merriam-Webster dictionary as something that prevents progress or achievement .
I don't know about you , my dear passenger , but for me , I have faced all types of obstacles in all shapes and sizes . They come in physical ways , mental ways , emotional ways and sometimes even a combination of all three ways of them . For today's episode , my main resource is an article that I found on psychologytoday . com .
It is an article by one of their psychologists , Karyn Hall . She's also the author and the podcast host of The Emotionally Sensitive Person , a podcast that finished airing back in 2019 . Today , we're going to be using her article Overcoming Obstacles . So what exactly is the first step to zigzagging through the obstacles that life throws our way ?
It's actually quite simple you just have to stop . I know it sounds a little counterproductive to stop before dealing with an obstacle , but the reason that we want to stop is because we want to take a pause and we want to see what is happening . What is this new obstacle that is in our way ?
Or maybe it has been an obstacle that has been in our way for a while , right ? So if this obstacle has been in our way for a while , we kind of want to look at it and see what it is and put a name to it . If it's an obstacle that just came in , we want to do the same thing .
We want to know what we're dealing with before we're able to deal with it .
So , really , if you think about it , stopping is actually quite a powerful move when it comes to dealing with obstacles , because it means that you get that clarity and you get that moment of peace before you actually have to deal with them , once you stop and think about what this obstacle is and you can put a name to it and now are ready to deal with it .
The next step is to practice radical acceptance . Now , radical acceptance is actually quite hard to master and let me tell you , I've been trying that for 29 years and I'm still struggling with it .
The reality is that all types of obstacles are going to come our way , but the main obstacles that are going to come our way are ones that we cannot control , and as an example , I can use my diagnosis of an ultra rare bleeding disorder . There's no way that I can change that .
There's no way that I can wake up one day and say I no longer have factor five deficiency . So over the last 29 years , I've had to deal with the fact that this is a diagnosis that is going to affect my life and it's going to affect my quality of life as a whole and I have come to accept it Now .
It doesn't mean I like it all the time , but it does mean that it has allowed me to understand hey , you can't control this .
It is going to affect what jobs you're able to get , it is going to affect what activities you're able to get , it is going to affect what activities you're able to involve yourself in , but it doesn't have to necessarily take over every single aspect of your life , and you know , part of zigzagging through life's obstacles is also dealing with your emotions .
If you're like me , I am an extremely sensitive emotional person , which means that when something hurts , I am crying , crying , crying . When something makes me happy , I am smiling , I am overfilled with joy , and sometimes it can be kind of hard to control as well .
But the reality is that we have to be kind to ourselves and we have to accept the emotions that are around us . We have to accept hey , I'm feeling sad right now or hey , I'm feeling happy right now , and , unlike obstacles , we are able to control our emotions .
Now I'm not saying , prevent yourself from crying , but hey , you might be able to control the amount of tears that come through , or even like how much excitement you're showing out there , and the reason for this is not to prevent you from expressing your emotions , it's just to kind of like regulate how your body reacts to those emotions .
Because the reality is that when you are experiencing emotions , it can also cause a lot of stress on your body , and stress has the power of affecting all types of aspects of your health . So in order to do this , you need to accept those emotions .
But you can also control these emotions by simply being aware of what they are and kind of controlling like , hey , do I want this to overtake me right now , or is there a better way to deal with the emotion that I'm having ? Also , who says that you have to go through all of this alone ? Nobody , in fact .
You can ask for input of your family , your friends and even health professionals to help you zigzag through these obstacles .
In my case , when I started having difficulties accepting the fact that I kept losing my jobs and just felt like I was a burden because of my bleeding disorder , I actually reached out to my health professionals , like my therapist , and I was just like listen , I don't know how to deal with this any longer . I feel like a burden .
I feel like every time I try , put my best foot forward , things keep happening . That put me back like 10 to 15 steps back , and I honestly don't know what else to do right now . And she was actually the person that helped me .
See , Frances , this is never going to change for you , and there's power in knowing that this is not going to change for you , because it allows you to realize hey , for instance , because you have a bleeding disorder and it's going to affect your career choices , you have to determine what do you want to do ?
Obviously , I want to be financially stable by myself , and that means that instead of having a full-time job , I might have to have a part-time job . Or instead of having a job where I go into an office , I might have to settle for a remote job .
But you see how , by asking for input , I was able to come up with different options and different ideas of how to deal with them . This brings me to the next point .
Sometimes you have to reevaluate these obstacles , because these obstacles can actually be a redirection of things that you might have never considered , that you want to do or that you want to deal with .
Again , in my case , I've been so used to having a job in person that thinking of having a remote job fully I don't know like it's not really something that I've thought of or considered .
But then , if you think about it , back in 2019 with COVID and 2020 , most of our jobs were remote and all of a sudden , something that nobody could really consider became a reality and now most people actually desire to have a remote job because that was an obstacle that brought in a new , upgraded way of working .
And now people are like , hey , you know what I actually like working at home way more than going into the office . So sometimes obstacles can actually make you reevaluate how you want to live your life and they have a purpose . The great thing is that once you have purpose , you have meaning , and that is something that you need to find within the obstacles .
So for me because I don't know when I might have a spontaneous bleed that might affect my ability to perform jobs that I am a part of I now realize that in order for me to take action with these obstacles right , zigzagging through these obstacles . For me right now , that means having a part-time job and hey , who knows , maybe in the future .
It might mean having a full-time job that is remote , or maybe it will mean having a hybrid job , or maybe it will mean having three part-time jobs . I don't know what the future is going to look like , but I can definitely take action today to find meaning within the obstacles that are happening right now and dealing with them right .
So that's kind of like what you need to start doing is with these obstacles . What meaning can I find behind them and what actions can I take in order to deal with them ? Well , my dear passenger , the time has come for the last stop of the day , recap time . Today's episode discussed obstacles , which are simply things that can prevent progress or improvement .
Now we know that the first step to zigzagging through obstacles is to stop . You want to make sure you know what you're dealing with before you start dealing with it . Right after you're aware of what the obstacle is and how you plan to deal with it , you're able to practice radical acceptance and also accept your emotions .
Radical acceptance is super hard , so please , please , please , please , be gentle with yourself and have grace . It is something that takes a long , long time to master and , in terms of your emotions , your emotions are more controllable than obstacles . Why ? Because the majority of the obstacles that you will face in life are going to be uncontrollables .
The best part about all of this is that you're not alone . You have family , you have friends and you have health professionals that can help you along the way , if you simply take the time to ask for their input .
Once you do , you're able to reevaluate how the obstacle is affecting your life and also see it , maybe , as a redirection to something that you might not have considered before .
Finding meaning can be such a powerful move because it allows you to take action right now , in the present , and I know that a lot of times , we want to focus in the future and we want to focus on the past , but the best place to focus on is right now . So make sure to find that meaning and make sure to take action .
Remember , self-growth is an endless journey towards self-improvement . However , you don't ever have to do it alone . As your tour guide , my goal is to guide you with the best intentions and the best research available .
Make sure you follow me on Instagram , facebook and TikTok at the Self-Growth Train Podcast , and to also follow me on my new website , theselfgrowthtrainpodcast . com . As always , all the resources used today have been added to the episode's descriptions . Well , until the next stop , dear passengers , safe travels . Bye !