The Real Question - podcast cover

The Real Question

The Real Question is a show that holds space for life’s tough questions. Each episode, a guest brings a personal question they’re grappling with, and Chaplain Mauricio Bruce helps them find an answer. This season, our focus is on future-oriented questions – those that start with ‘Should I…’ 


Mauricio sits down with guests who are contemplating big and small changes in their lives — whether it’s habits, careers, or relationships. In every episode, he asks the pivotal question: “Who do you want to be and what’s the best path to get there?”


The Real Question is produced by Not Sorry Productions, a feminist organization that produces podcasts, educational content, live shows, and immersive experiences with the explicit goal of addressing the spiritual needs of its participants. Through community, rigor, and ritual, we treat traditionally secular things as if they were sacred. To learn more about what we do, visit https://notsorryworks.com/

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episodes

Did They Quit: Nicotine?

The next person we're checking in with this week is Ely Kreimendahl – host of one of our favorite podcasts, Shame Spiral . How did things turn out for Ely? Was she able to quit nicotine? -- This show is completely funded by Patreon, and we are so grateful to our supporters who make it possible. If you can, please considering chipping in ! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information....

Dec 26, 202311 minSeason 3Ep. 49

Did They Quit: Being a Teacher?

Across this holiday week, we're checking back in with some past guests. How did things turn out for them? Did they quit what they wanted to? Today, we're talking to Lacy from Should I Quit: Being a Teacher? -- This show is completely funded by Patreon, and we are so grateful to our supporters who make it possible. If you can, please considering chipping in ! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information....

Dec 25, 20238 minSeason 3Ep. 48

Should I Quit: My Grudge?

Jacki has had a grudge against her cousin for the past three years. Jacki turned to her cousin during a tough time and left the situation feeling really abandoned and betrayed. But now, years later, still hurt, she’s wondering – is this grudge really serving her?  This week on Should I Quit? Jacki and Vanessa discuss how we process hurt and move forward.  -- This show is completely funded by Patreon, and we are so grateful to our supporters who make it possible. If you can, please...

Dec 11, 202330 minSeason 3Ep. 47

Should I Quit: My Dream of Being a Rockstar?

Five years ago, Penni Jo made a late-in-life decision to pursue a career as a songwriter. Now, with a few years of rejection under her belt, she’s wondering if it’s time to give up on that dream. Should she just get a ‘real job’ with better benefits? This week on Should I Quit? Miranda and Vanessa discuss financial security and what success feels like when you're pursuing your art. If you want to check out Penni Jo's music, you can find her on Spotify and Apple Music . -- This show is completely...

Nov 27, 202324 minSeason 3Ep. 46

When to Quit Your Job (with Anne Helen Petersen)

Anne Helen Petersen is the voice behind the popular newsletter, Culture Study , and the podcast, Work Appropriate . This week she joins Vanessa to talk about our relationship to work, social media, and aging. -- This show is completely funded by Patreon, and we are so grateful to our supporters who make it possible. If you can, please considering chipping in ! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information....

Nov 13, 202326 minSeason 3Ep. 46

Should I Quit: My Comfortable Relationship?

Over the last year, Miranda has taken some steps back from her relationship. They used to live together and now they live separately. She used to imagine marrying him, now it doesn’t seem in the cards. Is it time to just give up this man entirely? Or can she be happy with the comfort and pleasure of what she has in front of her?  This week on Should I Quit? Miranda and Vanessa explore how to know when unhappiness in a relationship is normal and when it means you need to break up.  -- T...

Oct 30, 202323 minSeason 3Ep. 45

Should I Quit: Drinking? (with Marcelle Kosman)

We're thrilled today to be joined by Marcelle Kosman, co-host of one of our favorite podcasts – Material Girls . Marcelle likes to have a couple glasses of wine at the end of the day to unwind, but she finds it hard to talk about. Is it really okay that she drinks this much? Or is she fooling herself? And does just asking the question mean that she has a problem? This week on Should I Quit? Marcelle and Vanessa discuss how to know when you're in denial. -- This show is completely funded by Patre...

Oct 16, 202324 minSeason 3Ep. 44

Should I Quit: Mom Instagram?

Rebecca just had her second child and is spending a lot of time, focus, and energy on being a mom. But sometimes it feels like her whole life is consumed by that category! Even her instagram is filled with mom-related accounts and ads. Is that what she wants? Or should she unsubscribe and carve out one space where ‘mom’ isn’t the most important thing? This week on Should I Quit? Rebecca and Vanessa explore shifting priorities and motherhood. -- This show is completely funded by Patreon, and we a...

Oct 02, 202325 minSeason 3Ep. 43

Should We Quit? | An Announcement

Producer Ariana drops into the podcast to discuss an upcoming change with Should I Quit? Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Sep 25, 202311 minSeason 3Ep. 42

(How) Should I Quit: My 40s?

Kathy is turning 49 this year and she wants to be planning for the decade ahead! Should she continue on the career path she's on? Or it time to step off the path to try something new? With help from Fredrick Beuchner and Lord of the Rings, Kathy and Vanessa discuss how to live a joyful life. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information....

Sep 18, 202332 minSeason 3Ep. 41

Should I Quit: Harry Potter?

G has always loved Harry Potter – so much so that in 2019 they joined their local Harry Potter and the Sacred Text group to meet monthly and make meaning from the books. When J.K. Rowling outed herself as transphobic a few years ago, G stuck with the group and their fandom. But lately, their experience as a trans person and a Harry Potter fan feel more and more at odds. Is it time to let go of the books they once loved? This week on Should I Quit? Vanessa and G discuss how personal relation...

Sep 11, 202323 minSeason 3Ep. 40

Should I Quit: Trying to Get My Driver’s License?

Shira has been trying to learn how to drive for the past two years. She failed her first driving test and recently, when trying to renew her learner's permit, she failed that too. Feeling extremely discouraged about the whole thing, she's now wondering: is it even worth it? This week on Should I Quit? Vanessa and Shira explore how to accomplish something when you have no motivation left. -- This show is completely funded by Patreon, and we are so grateful to our supporters who make it possible. ...

Sep 04, 202321 minSeason 3Ep. 39

Should I Quit: My Best Friends?

Paige has had the same best friends for twenty years but lately they've been really letting her down. She doesn't feel seen or loved by them, and they don't seem to understand her perspective. Is it time to just end it? This week on Should I Quit? Vanessa and Paige explore when it's okay to walk away from people you love. -- This show is completely funded by Patreon, and we are so grateful to our supporters who make it possible. If you can, please considering chipping in ! Hosted on Acast. See a...

Jul 31, 202327 minSeason 3Ep. 38

Should I Quit: My Career?

Sarah owns a ballet studio in a small town. She loves dance and she loves teaching, but running her own business is really stressful! If she changes career path, will that give her the opportunity for a better life? This week on Should I Quit? Vanessa and Sarah explore how to un-couple your identity from your job. -- This show is completely funded by Patreon, and we are so grateful to our supporters who make it possible. If you can, please considering chipping in ! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com...

Jul 24, 202333 minSeason 3Ep. 37

Should I Quit: My Crush?

Jocelin has a crush on their friend Paul. Ever since they met, there's been an intense instant connection – they like all the same things, they text all day, they hang out constantly. But Paul doesn't have feelings for Jocelin. Can there still be a friendship? Or is it time to end it? This week on Should I Quit? Vanessa and Jocelin explore what to do when a relationship becomes painful. -- This show is completely funded by Patreon, and we are so grateful to our supporters who make it possible. I...

Jul 17, 202320 minSeason 3Ep. 36

Should I Quit: The United States?

Prerna has lived in The United States for over ten years but it will probably take her another thirty years to get a green card. She loves living in the US, but the bureaucracy, uncertainty, and limitations are big source of stress in her life. Is it all worth it? Or is time to try another country? This week on Should I Quit? Vanessa and Prerna explore how much insecurity we each can tolerate. -- This show is completely funded by Patreon, and we are so grateful to our supporters who make it poss...

Jul 10, 202328 minSeason 3Ep. 35

Should I Quit: Listening to Podcasts about Addiction?

For the past fifteen years, Rob has been concerned about his relationship to opiates. One of the ways he has managed that relationship has been listening to podcasts about addiction. But recently he has been feeling like he doesn't like or need these podcasts anymore. Is it okay to stop listening? This week on Should I Quit? Vanessa and Rob explore the guard rails we put up in our lives to protect us, and how to know when those guard rails aren't serving us anymore. -- This show is completely fu...

Jul 03, 202322 minSeason 3Ep. 34

Should I Quit: My Fitness Watch?

Allie started running casually in college and has gotten more and more into it over the years. She joined a running club, she ran her first marathon, and she bought herself a fitness watch. But recently her fitness watch has been stressing her out. Is it the fitness watch that’s the problem? Or is it her relationship to running more broadly?  This week on Should I Quit? Vanessa and Allie explore the difference between setting goals and gamifying your life. -- This show is completely funded ...

Jun 26, 202320 minSeason 3Ep. 33

Should I Quit: My Uterus?

Every time Mars has a period they think about getting their uterus taken out. They hate having this dumb organ in their body! But doesn't everyone hate their period? And what if they want to have kids in the future? This week on Should I Quit? Vanessa and Mars explore how we relate to our own bodies. -- This show is completely funded by Patreon, and we are so grateful to our supporters who make it possible. If you can, please considering chipping in ! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for m...

Jun 19, 202330 minSeason 3Ep. 32

Should Vanessa Quit: Trying to Be Clean?

We're taking one more week off of regular programming, but we'll be back next week on June 19th. In the meantime, please enjoy this un-locked Patreon perk, our Should Vanessa Quit? segment with Vanessa and Ariana. Our Patreon supporters make this show possible and we're so grateful. If you're a regular listener of the show, we'd love to have your support . Also, please submit your quitting questions ! We're always looking for new guests. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more informatio...

Jun 12, 202316 minSeason 3Ep. 31

Pop Culture Prescription: When You Have Some Extra Time to Yourself

As we prepare for our Not Sorry C.A.M.P. this week , we're taking a break from the show. We'll be back in two weeks, on June 19th. In the meantime, please enjoy this un-locked Patreon perk, our Pop Culture Prescriptions with Vanessa and Margaret H. Willison. Our Patreon supporters make this show possible and we're so grateful. If you're a regular listener of the show, we'd love to have your support . Also, please submit your quitting questions ! We're always looking for new guests. Hosted on Aca...

Jun 05, 20239 minSeason 3Ep. 30

Should I Quit: Nicotine?

Ely knows that vaping is bad for her, but she can't seem to find the motivation to stop. Is it okay to indulge certain vices? Or is that logic just the way that addiction works? This week on Should I Quit? Vanessa and Ely explore our own self-destructive instincts. In this episode, Ely mentions her experience with AA. If you or someone you love is struggling with addiction, there are AA meetings hosted around the world. You can find one near you on their website . And if you enjoyed hearing Ely,...

May 29, 202327 minSeason 3Ep. 29

Should I Quit: Making New Friends?

Margaret is a very sociable person – everywhere she goes, she finds new people to be friends with. But with that list ever-expanding, she feels like she's not serving her existing friendships as well as she'd like. Should she stop making new friends? This week on Should I Quit? Vanessa and Margaret explore when it's okay to disappoint the people you love. -- This show is completely funded by Patreon, and we are so grateful to our supporters who make it possible. If you can, please consideri...

May 22, 202326 minSeason 3Ep. 28

Should I Quit: Giving Advice? (asking Heather Havrilesky)

Heather Havrilesky is the voice behind the popular existential advice column, Ask Polly . This week she joins Vanessa to talk about giving advice, when to quit, and how to better be "your ragged-ass bullshit self." -- This show is completely funded by Patreon, and we are so grateful to our supporters who make it possible. If you can, please considering chipping in ! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information....

May 15, 202322 minSeason 3Ep. 27

Should I Quit: Posting Photos of my Kids on Instagram?

Courtney loves posting photos of her kids on instagram – she loves scrolling back and seeing all the small moments captured, she loves being able to share those moments with family and friends. But her kids are young enough that they can't truly consent to the photos, and she worries that when they grow up, they won't approve of what has been shared. This week on Should I Quit? Vanessa and Courtney explore how to evaluate risk as a parent. -- This show is completely funded by Patreon, and we are...

May 08, 202327 minSeason 3Ep. 26

Should I Quit: Social Media Before Bed?

Chris Stedman gets stuck scrolling Twitter at night. He knows why he does it – it makes him feel in control, it soothes his anxiety. But should he be sitting in that anxiety instead of soothing it? This week on Should I Quit? Vanessa and Chris explore our relationship to social media and how to counter perfectionism. Be sure to check out Chris's latest book, IRL: Finding Our Real Selves in a Digital World , and his podcast Unread . (You can also find him on Twitter, of course , @ChrisDStedman .)...

May 01, 202326 minSeason 3Ep. 25

Should I Quit: Going on Zillow?

Taylor gets sucked into looking at houses on Zillow. It's addictive! Comparing prices, imagining her life in different places... But is that imagining good for her? Or is it keeping her from appreciating the life she has? This week on Should I Quit? Vanessa and Taylor explore when it's okay to plan for the future at the expense of living in the present. -- This show is completely funded by Patreon, and we are so grateful to our supporters who make it possible. If you can, please considering chip...

Apr 24, 202326 minSeason 3Ep. 24

Special Edition: Reality Television and ‘The One’ (with Julia Argy)

Julia Argy, our incredible pilgrimage director has her first book out today! It's called The One , and it's about a woman who joins a reality television show to find love. Publishers Weekly says it best: “[A] smart debut…Argy takes on voyeurism, feminism, and gender norms, as Emily wonders if she really ought to put all her energy into finding love, which is what she was conditioned to do all her life…. [A] winning portrait of a young woman trying to come into her own.” In this bonus episode, Va...

Apr 18, 202320 min

Should I Quit: Telling White Lies?

Brigid has gotten into the habit of telling white lies. It's a defense mechanism to feel in control of what people know and think about her. But is being so in control actually bad for her sense of self? This week on Should I Quit? Vanessa and Brigid explore how to stop caring what other people think about you. Did Brigid's question resonate with you? Submit something you respect about yourself and see what others have to say . -- This show is completely funded by Patreon, and we are so grateful...

Apr 17, 202325 minSeason 3Ep. 23

Should I Quit: My Yoga Subscription?

During the pandemic, Brooke signed up for an online yoga subscription. Does she ever use it? No. Can she get herself to cancel it? Also no.  This week on Should I Quit? Vanessa and Brooke discuss the psychological burden of our digital lives.  -- This show is completely funded by Patreon, and we are so grateful to our supporters who make it possible. If you can, please considering chipping in ! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information....

Apr 10, 202322 minSeason 3Ep. 22
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