#80 You're Slipping Slim

but it's still gonna pop up here and there. But I was so excited to um that I got this day to be back to normal and be what I want to be for you, which is in a good mood and in the mood to laugh. Even though yesterday I did laugh a lot and had a lot of fun, even though I was in a negative headspace. It wasn't a fake like getting cheery and like being I mean obviously, I mean, I went through all the emotions yesterday. Thank you guys for letting me cry on my podcast. I

Love you. UM got a lot of nice notes about it, and um yeah, and I thought I was gonna like regret so many of the things I went off on because it was just like me kind of you know, emotionally vomiting all over you guys, and um, I didn't. I had no regrets. I was just like, you know what you felt that way, and even if you do feel like, oh that was a little insane and spiraling,

like who cares? Who doesn't you know? So uh, whenever yeah, like I said, whenever I annoy you or I'm just like not in the mood for you, like just no, I'll be back to my normal self and maybe take a second to go, Dude, I've had days like this and I don't want anyone listening to me, So turn it off or turn it to double the speed, and then I'll be I'll quickly zip through it. Um. Yeah, it's just like it's uh, it's weird when those moods come on, but it definitely lifted for me. I'm back

on track. I'm taking my meds uh responsibly, because sometimes I try to stave off my meds because I, um, I want to be able to sleep or I want to um wait for to feel good, and I feel like I don't deserve to feel good so early in the morning, and then it'll I'll start feeling bad by the evening if I take it too early. So then I'll take my meds later, and then by the time I take it, the mood has already set in, and

then I can't get out of it. So take your meds everyone, And if your meds don't work, and some days you also feel sad, um, journal or write a song, listen to some music. Ah, there's lots of ways to cope with feelings sad. No, what do you do to cope when you are in a mood that you know?

Because when I get into really I was hanging out with a friend yesterday and they were saying that when they get in a really bad mood, they don't want me around because they're gonna they don't want anyone around because they will say really mean things to their loved ones and be like they don't trust themselves, like this person was saying, Like I was in a state of mind where I wanted to blow up my life, and I would have tried to blow up our friendship, like

our relationship. I would have tried to like hurt you because I was in such a negative place, and I go, I relate to that. I don't do it too. For some reason, I don't do it to you, to this person,

and I'm like, I don't do it to know. I don't do it to my girlfriends, but I do it day Andrew, like, I understand that state of mind where like, there's someone where if you're in a bad mood around them, they should steer the fun clear and protect you should protect them from you by staying in your goddamn room all day because you know that you're going to be mean and you can't help it. And but the thing is, and that's why I'm getting to this. I told this person.

I told my friend who avoids me when they're when they get these kind of moods, I go, we need I like being around you, and I want to help you get through those moods because I'm your friend and I love you, and oh, I want to come up with a way that you can let me know you're in that mood. I can prepare myself and enter into it knowing that the things you say are going to be hurtful and that you can't help them, and you can work on tools that prevent you from being your

ugliest self because it is preventable. You just have to come up with tools. So I have a couple of tools for me when I want to be And by the way, it's not just Andrew, it's my It's my mom, My dad, Andrew are pretty much the three people in my life that I feel comfortable enough being really really nasty too when I'm sad, and it's like embarrassing to admit. And it's just because I love them and I know it's unconditional and that I can be. But it isn't

like my parents. Maybe my parents is because I came out of my mom's pussy and my dad's dick at one point. You know, you do come out your dad's dick, um uh, But I didn't come out of Andrew's dick and or his pussy, and so he could just go fuck you, but then I go. But then the podcast, what's he gonna do? It's like no, no, no no, he could walk away from all of it. He doesn't need any of this ship if you're being abusive to him. So I have to work on protecting him from me

when I'm in those moods. But most of all, I have to work on how I handle my mood because that's not okay. Just because you acknowledge that you're nasty when you're in those moods doesn't mean it gives you a free pass to be that way. So no, h do I know you're a person that struggles with your anger? What do you or like being in a mood and saying nasty stuff? Just because I've heard of it, and I would never even guess it for you. We've talked

about it a little bit, what do you do? So similar to your friend who just needs their space from other people, That's exactly what I need. I just like cannot be around anybody, and then I just need to be with myself and either I'll distract myself by reading something or just trying to, you know, go through the techniques of like just talking myself through it. It's not like I just I guess a lot of it is thinking about like, well, do you really want your relationship

to be this way? Like it could just be fun and harmonious and easy going. Why do you have to um like, uh, why do you have to pick a fight? Why do you have to have things escalate? Why does it have to go that way as opposed to working it out, just talking through and not getting so offended and then just kind of like working through why I'm getting offended. Can I put you in a position. Can I can we talk about specifics because I really do. I want to help myself here, I want to help

others here. Let's say you're in a bad mood and maybe this doesn't you don't relate to this, so let me know if you do that. Um is, Let's say it's not related to your fiance who you live with. It's not he is not the cause of it, whatever that's putting you in this dark cloud. You don't. Let's say you're in a bad mood and just are looking

really negatively at the world. Maybe something's going on with work, like it's out side of him, right, um Will you stay away from him during that time because you know that you'll be mean to him because they'll be in the wake, or do you bring him in? Truthfully, I haven't really felt that way in a very long time. Um so. But but it's because you've got help for it. So let's talk about before you got help for it. Yeah,

I'd probably just like isolate myself and be alone. But that's just like a negative thing I was doing to myself anyway. Yeah, because I see what happened was like this friend of mine, like all of a sudden, I thought they were mad at me and like had been given up on our friendship and wanted me out of their life because we went from being like very close friends to nothing in like, oh I went away to

to loom and like went away. We kind of were like in touch then, like you know, you are with your people you love when on vacation, but like not a lot. And then came back and I thought I was going to pick back up to like best friends again, and it just didn't. And it was like almost like

I had done something because it was such a drastic thing. However, this person I also knew, wasn't seeing anyone in their life, so I was kind of not taking it personally, but I was so angry at being cut out and not being brought in when a friend needs me clearly that

I was like, I'm fucking done too. Then if you don't want to tell me, if you And then when I find out that this person is just going through a hard time and is actually protecting me from their anger and their sadness, I obviously understood it and was like totally fine with it. When this person was in a better state of mind, they could explain it. But

I was like, next time. I can't promise you that next time, I'm not gonna want to fucking cut the rope when you do this to me because it felt so I don't like when friends abandoned me and change the tone of our relationship. Um, So I can't promise that next time, I'm just gonna be like, Oh, she's just in a bad mood and doesn't want to talk to me and like it's nothing personal. I might go to this like fuck her, you know, and like cut her off, and I don't want to do that. I

want to remember that it's not me. But I also think that she can come up with a way of being able to like a code word, like a rooster type code word of being like I'm in one of these moods, stay away. But at the same time, I know that when you're in those moods, you need people.

You can't do this alone. See, this person was like, seriously, if you would have come by, if you would have like stopped by and demanded to see me, or I would have tried to get you to leave by by saying the meanest things to you possible that would hurt you so much so that you couldn't ever see me again, like that's the state I was in and I wanted to like blow up every single thing in my life and I go okay, and the person was like, well

it just for me. I just want to be there for my friends when they get into that and um, and I think that some of the things we result we go to when we're feeling really sad. And now I can only speak for myself, but when I'm really depressed, I want to listen to sad music that makes me feel as oppressed as I am when I'm suicidal and having those thoughts. I like to listen to podcasts about

people who have killed themselves. I like my favorite suicide podcast that talk that interview people that have committed suicide, and I like hear how sad they are, and I like feel it and I feel justified in my sadness and I feel like they're right. And all of this is like the it's like laying in a coffin, like it's the worst thing you can do, like get out of that, even though it feels so good to wallow everyone. That's why sad music rocks is because people want to

know that other humans feel the same way. When you get in those moods like like for me now with Andrew, like if I'm in one of those moods like I was the past couple of days of like wanting to say the things like wanting to put him down because he's in a cheery mood cleaning his room and I'm just like it's rooms not even clean, Like he shouldn't even feel like good about this, Like I'm like, oh, I did the fucking ugliest thing. When I was in

did I can talk about this a podcast? When I was into Loom, I was such a content and I was able to apologize for it right away, kind of

right away, you know, like an hour later. But Kristen and I were getting ready to go to breakfast, and I was just like, um, we were talking about like COVID Delta variant like sweeping the nation and how like it's it's looking like master Like we were just it was looking It was one of those days of the news where it just felt like things were gonna shut down again, and Kristen and I was just like, well,

there goes my fucking fifty five city tour. I was just like kind of like like I don't even that's gonna be a logistical nightmare getting like scheduling that. But I was kind of like resolute, like good, I don't even want to go, Like I was so sad about life the past couple of weeks. I was just like whatever. And then Kristen was like talking about her husband's birthday and she was, I guess, you know, we're gonna have

to look into a different place to go. We're gonna go to Hawaii and in September, but I guess or November, but now I guess we're gonna go. I have a fifty five city tour that needs to be figured out, like, and you're talking about a Hawaii trip. I literally said that as I'm like brushing my teeth with her, and she goes, and I loved her for this because I knew that was country. I know that they're starving kids

in Africa. Everyone there's always something that's more red tape or more tragic or whatever based on like you know whatever, there's always someone who's like suffering more, and it's so

shitty to throw that back at them. And I knew it as soon as I said it, and Kirsten usually just especially that last week was just like putting up with my bad mood and being a very nurturing friend and like letting those kind of like ducking those matrix sing those bullets, you know, bending backwards because she's very flexible. But this time, no, she just goes, Okay, well, um, just because your life is hard doesn't mean that other people don't have hard lives. And in different ways, she

just said something very gentle. She was just like, it's you're like, just because you have fifty five dates doesn't mean that some people don't have one that is actually very important to them. And I was just like yeah, And I wasn't ready to like apologize, you know when you like, no, you're wrong, but you just can't. You just it's too embarrassing. So I just finished brushing my teeth.

I went to breakfast, and I was just so sad, Like that was one of the last days we were there, and I was so sad because I knew what a bitch I had been to my friend, and how I had just exemplified the thing I hate more than anything, which is my life's worth worse than your Stop stop being sad about your life, because you don't have a right to be. Why are you sad about Corey Monty thought you didn't know him, and then I feel like my feelings are invalidated, Like I hate when people do that,

and I did it to my best friend. And so later on we got back to the room, we were alone, and I was kind of just like you know, pouting about something new, and I was throwing things around. I was just like packing like my hat, my mess you, Hugh cage, my bed, and and Kristen's like talk to me, like what's what are what are your thoughts? And I was just like, she goes, She's so cute. She goes, what's it like when you get depressed? Like what does

it feel like? Because she doesn't suffer with depression like mine. She has depression before, but it's been like triggered by massive life events that would have called for it, and mine's just kind of like out of nowhere. And she

was like, what does it feel like? And I was like, I think that's when I said, it's being really mean and not having any control over how nasty I can be, and like, I mean, I had this moment with you and Carlisle that night where I said, I can't believe I was so nasty to Carlyle about um that one comic that she thought everyone knew like just dumb ship. And so I said, Kirsten, honestly, I've been in a bad mood for an hour and a half now because of how rude I was to you when I was

brushing my teeth about Corey's forty birthday. And she goes, yeah, I mean that was like not that nice, but like I knew that you were, and I go she was like, I was nervous, like I like stood up, like I like, I just like couldn't take anymore. I like had to defend myself. And I was like, Leaves, yes, don't let

me get away with this ship. And I'm not, that's it's not your responsibility to like like, that's not I don't ever want to make someone feel like, well, you let me treat you like that, So I'm going to it's your fault that, I mean, and you didn't stand up to me, stand up to me, pussy, that's like

such a bully thing to do. But I was like, Kerson, I know how hard that was because I'm so scary when I mean, that was awesome and that made me be able to see the wrongs of my ways sooner than and I'm able to say now, like that's so rude and I'm so sorry that I did that, and that was and I can really say that like that came from a moment of like just being defenseless against the hairpin trigger of like my life is shitder and

we all have it. It's okay, um, And I was able to forgive myself for that, and then by doing so, Kirsten was able to forgive me and um, and it's but it's so embarrassing to it. As much as I love to apologize, and I really do, it's not so easy when it's like an hour and a half after you do. It's the sooner. It's way easier to apologize for things years before than it is minutes after, and the quicker you can minimize that time between you saying

it and apologizing. I told this best friend the other day, I said, you know what, I love you enough that I think I would be able to I can. I think I can forgive anyone for anything. Let me be honest, if Donald Trump somehow did ayahuasca or something or at a different brain overnight like and just was like, oh my god, I've been the worst if he apologized for everything and was like I was such a dick, slob, selfish all these things. First of all, i'd go who

wrote this script for him? Because he's unable to feel these feelings. I mean, I really look at Donald Trump as someone who is incapable of knowing these wrongs without some extreme medical intervention. Um, but I could forgive one. I really could so Um. I don't know. I'm just gonna try to apologize sooner. My goal for this weekend and for the rest of my life is to the first time I go, you need to apologize, but not now because you're too scared. I'm going to Dancing with

the Stars, bravery. Remember that I danced live on TV and that was the bravest thing I've ever done. And that if I can do that, I can apologize for something as soon as I know it's wrong. That's my challenge to myself. Let's get Andrew in here so I can apologize to him. Andrew, Andrew another silly up top. No, it was so fun. I'm just like, you know, I'm talking about apologizing. And how did you sleep, buddy? How did I slept really well? Actually? Yeah, well, happy birthday?

He uh, turned sixty six. It's my dad's sixty six birthday. Andrew I call I face timed him this morning. And Andrew hopped on the call with him and your guys relationship. He loves you so much. It made me laugh so hard.

He just makes one of my dad for being old and like, you're like the my dad loves you and you're one of the only people that like I've seen actively talk ship with my dad in like a really funny, loving way and um, and he just gets such a kick out the best and like likes to give it back. It's really adorable. I get along very well with What do you say to him? You were making me laugh so fucking hard. Was making fun of He's getting new tea, has to get his teeth removed. He has to get

my dad has like when he was a kid. This kind of a cute story his dentist and you know, back in the sixties, his dentist was like, did the next rain goes? You know, son, you have a tooth that's horizontal, that's like in your chin, growing on top of your other teeth, like a weird, you know, rogue tooth. You're gonna have to have that surgically extract. You better tell your mom to schedule that, and my dad just was like, okay, I will, and then never told his mom.

So cut to like sixty years later, he is his teeth are like feeling dead a little bit, and he went in and they're like, yeah, we gotta take out four teeth because this fucking weird horizontal teeth. Anyway, it's not gonna cost him fifteen tho dollars Andrews fifteen dollars I'll take out. You're just put in play dough. You don't need fucking teeth. No one cares about your and

my dad. I just love the fact that, like he kind of showed his dentists, like the dentist was like, we gotta take this out, and he's like, no, we don't. It's been sixty Like he got sixty years out of it, like you know what I mean, Like it wasn't even like the dentist was probably like we gotta knelt right away, and he got that story. Do you know many times I heard about the horizontal tooth growing up? I literally

heard that story fifteen thousand times. For if I had a dollar for every time my dad told that story,

he'd be able to pay for his teeth to get fixed. Um, no, it's it's and now my dad's my dad really is like one of these people that you know, he's going to get surgery and it's going to be a big deal in our house because my dad is a he he you know, I think men sometimes like get women can like stand pain and like traumatic like medical events a lot easier than men, and like less complain about it less because we're always kind of known as being

hysterical and naggy and like emotional. So women tuck it down and like we've learned to like suppress our pain because it just we don't want someone to go, oh, this woman is just complaining too much. Let's just put our out of the misery and keep going. That's like you know, back in the or in tribes, if women cried enough, they just be like shut up, bitch and like probably kill you. So women just have to be like, I'm fine, nothing's wrong. But men can complain all they

want because they also have to complain though. You know, no, no, it is not easy being men. And I'm not saying men are bad and this is not you know, obviously, this is a generalization. But I've found that men get a little bit like a baby or when they're sick, which when I am in a relationship, I love when a guy is a widow baby and I get to go, are you a win a week? And I get to go, oh, are you sick? I will take care of you. I love like a little like man. That's just kind of

like leaning into being a baby. I probably want a baby. Um, but uh, I was laughing you just like you know, calling my dad on his birthday it always or all and my parents on their birthday. Sometimes it feels like, oh, this is just like I have to do it. It's a little bit like I'm not in the mood to call my dad right now. I'd like to be in the mood when I call my parents. And I was, and I wasn't and then you and then I was

because my dad and I were having fun. He was wearing a shirt that I got him for his birthday a few years ago, and uh, and then Andrew came in and like made me like, you made me appreciate my dad so much in that moment because you he was just so fun with you and like having such a good time laughing what else were you were saying that? Um?

He uh. He was talking about going to Atlantic City because we've been to Atlantic City, or we're going to Atlantic City this Saturday, the Borgata, and my dad had said he went there with my mom ten years ago

on some like work trip. They like had, you know, a function in atlant City and they're like, let's go to the the Borgata and he said that women it was the first He goes, I guess this happens all the time, but the first time I saw women standing on the bar making out, which I guess is a thing, and we're like, no, it's not. And he was like and then all the guys were cheering them on, and I was like, man, these guys are crazy. And it's like, you mean the women making out on the bar like

like that. My dad blamed it on the men because he said, we're doing it for the men. It is the men's problem. And Andrew goes, you mean the women, because my dad was like, god, I we just left being like, I guess men are like that. They're crazy and there's nothing an old man you'll beat the ship out of him, like I think every guy can late to telling an old guy who's falling apart, who was maybe kind of tough and they're back in their day that you will beat them with their own fake hip,

you know, stuff like that. It's just two guys just like I'll rip your dick off and put it in your ear. And he's like, it's so fun, and yeah, I'm looking into getting my dad a present today. I gotta figure out what to get him. I um, every every year I get them, I try to get him something. I mean, I bought my mom a fucking car, and so my dad's probably waiting like what's it gonna be, And I'm like, oh, it's a new guitar. Pick girl for that bottom mouth just be like, yeah, maybe I'll

just pay for his fun. That would be here, you go at least part of that. Well, if I had a dollar keep talking, Dad, every time you tell that story, I'll start going king, YEA so nice to me lately. And he's like, is there a correlation here between him and needing teeth? Like yeah, my dad is uh. I love my dad. Happy birthday, Dad, August fifty four, great, great time. He's a he's a great dad. I really

lucked out made me who I am? Um, He's like, I can't believe he's even an age where he would go, God, that's old as fuck. Like today, he joked that he was forty nine. He was like, and um, just forty nine. And I go, you actually have the spirit of a forty year old and he moved. He moves a little bit slower now. But my Dad, I mean, I don't without sounding ridiculous, my dad has the best body of any sixty six year old man you will ever see, unless that's sixty six year old man like only spends

time on his body. My dad has the best body. And I am bragging a little bit because I have my dad's body. I do have a dad body. Everyone knows it. Um, I will be, I will be. I'm turning like the because I don't exercise anymore. I don't diet, and I realized, like my normal body without doing anything extra, is lanky and long and like kind of hairless like my dad's. And I got a huge dick. Um, But I I am like, I'm turning. My dad and I

look the same from the back, like the same. We both have no ass our legs are exactly the same. Sometimes my dad and I sit and next to each other and our feet are like it's just it's eerie. But I'm very grateful because my dad has a beautiful, like even woman's figure. I mean like it's an androgeneous men or women would accept it, would you agree? Mean? Yeah, I think the older you guys get your getting closer to meeting in the middle of being the same ex And then my mom, I can't my my voice, my

personality and voice is turning into my mom. And I told her the other day, I go, I used to hate when people said that, and now I fucking love it because you're the funniest person ever. So if I get my dad's body and my mom has a great bod too, I've just like accepted that we I don't get my sister got my mom's looks. I got my

dad's looks, and I got my mom's personality. So today, um, I was actually doing an impression of my The thing that makes my dad laugh more than anything that I do is impressions of our family members and my mom. I haven't even done. When I was living at home, I used to do my mom like for my dad when my Mom's being not her best self, and like because this morning I could hear the vacuum going in

the background, and I go, what's his mom? I go, his mom cleaning and she goes, of course she's cleaning. And I go who's coming over? And he goes, no one, and I go, Dad, someone's coming over. There's my mom would not be feverishly unless someone. And he goes your sister, but she doesn't care, and I go, yes, she does. And my sister. I've told my sister sometimes because when my mom, when I was living there, my my my mom would go crazy cleaning and I go, what are

you doing? Lauren's coming over? And she's like, I'm not doing this for Lauren, doing it for me, and I go, it seems to be for Lauren because you weren't cleaning before Lauren said she was coming over. Then you started clean, Like it's okay to admit that you want your daughter to think you have a clean house even though she grew up in it and she knows it's clean, and she knows you're crazy. UM, And I say that with love,

crazy with love, But UM, I just started going. I started doing an impression my mom for my dad, which is maybe my most favorite thing to do. UM, because it makes my dad laugh so hard. So I just started going, e J, I'm cleaning the fucking house. What's it to you? If you would? It's your birthday. I haven't asked you to do a goddamn thing this today. Why are you giving me ship for cleaning? I like a clean fucking house, you know it's it's I'm the only one that picks up over here, and we look

like goddamn white trash. We got the kids coming over. I wanted to be clean, and my dad was laughing because you guys don't understand. That is exactly how my mom sounds, exactly when she is in like the fight or flight response of um, you know, being told? You know, my mom is not like being told why are you cleaning?

Because I want to? God damn it? Are you sure it's not because we're having people over and you're just trying to make people think that you are better than you are based on your cleaning, cleaning your house, even though they don't care and they love you anyway. I'm not doing this for someone else. It's just that's my mom. Andrew, What are you laughing about? Doing her voice? What do you what the know? You're just you know, what you

could do. You could pick up some things. I never asked you to pick up anything when you come over star house. But no, when when have I asked you to pick up anything to throw? From cans and recycling a couple of times? Oh oh, did you do those cans and recycling with you? This is all my weight. I just realized this is me. I know you're both your mom and your dad. Like anything you can plain about isn't that weird? I see like in you? And you know, look, I have my and my mom's dick,

so I get it. I mean, if your parents would have like hung out with you more, maybe you would have picked up something of theirs. Yeah, but we had a we had a house cleaner because they kind of abandoned you emotionally. And yeah, do you ever sound like um? I think I picked up things from my mom daring my whenever I'm very lazy. I mean, my mom was extremely lazy due to depression, and you know, never left her bed and displayed solitaire and drink wine on the rocks.

I do that, but just with lacroix um and instead of Solitaire, I just watched Dave. Your mom would have been so funny. Wasn't big like flavored seltzer water was dude, you know, is a lamb chop And she likes the zug on the bone. Boy, I mean, is you do that? Is you sing on the bone, I'll be like, Mom, not now, and you fucking do it in your own room. I love your parents. It's it's so funny to like hear like, and I'm so glad your mom isn't in

that state. I mean, your mom has her own issue, says she's going through health wise now, So glad that that didn't listen. I'm so scared, glad that her depression didn't kill her. You know what I mean, Like that kind of depression. I've been through it. I don't I

would have done the same fucking thing that your mom did. Yeah, I just like you don't have any other Yesterday was like getting so fucking sad with like just her being in Florida and like literally she was talking to her lung, you know, because she has cp D and she was which is emphysema, which is a lung disease, which so if you have COVID with that, it's pretty much it's a ticket to whatever to Yeah, have the vaccine which I found interesting that she could take the vaccine, so

why couldn't. But anyway, so then uh, she said her lung doctorrself like forty new patients like within the last day of COVID and they were all, you know, just like he told her she should not like leave her fucking her own bedroom. So she's like sucking the prisoners. Well she's like, okay, back to through you just hear American online going. But anyhow, you've got mail. It's just a yeah, life is sad, and um what I wanted to say though before you really brought it down with

what I said, Lamb was kidding. I'm dude, I'm kidding. I love I love talking about sad stuff. And UM, I'm sorry that it was sad for you to talk to your mom. You could always talk to me about that stuff. You know, I'm there for you. Bro through your bed truly through your bedroom door, and you're like, why are you on this side of the house but my mom? Just don't you hear the white noise machine vibrating myself right now? I don't want to talk about

your mom possibly. Um know, what what I will say is that the other night you when you got when you came out of your bedroom yesterday morning with a bunch of cans and you were like, I'm cleaning, baby, I'm feeling good. You go. Yeah, I think I was actually depressed the past couple of days. It was funny to me that you didn't know you were depressed until yeah, I knew, or maybe you didn't articulate. I don't know

what it is. And it's like that thing where like I don't want to complain anymore about things, but like anytime I fly, I swear to two days after, I'm just in a weird mental state. And I think a lot of people like a flying affects their brain and that on top of you know, the other stuff that was stressful this weekend, a lot of stress, like yeah, Brenna leaving me, being in a fucking bad mood, the one person you live with that's not really talking to you.

I mean, it's like, of course, but I do want to say though it was you were like I saw you post, we weren't really talking that much. I was just like, not in the mood to be social. It wasn't about you. It's so funny that I was just talking about someone doing that to me. And now I'm like offended by it, and and and that I have a right to be offended because I'm like, just tell me you're in a bad mood, then like, don't just cut me out and say like then I think it's

about me. But I was like, not that social wasn't doing you. But then I saw in your story you were like, oh my god, this new racing show. I'm obsessed. There's some show, some drug show or something, money Heist. And then I was like, okay, so he's in his room like enjoying this new show. He's not like staying away from me because he's mad at me, because I thought you were just like fine bitch and in your room trying to avoid me, and like just like when you were in your room all day a couple of

days ago, but you're watching Money Heist. I heard it through the I was like, oh, he's into this new show. And then it was confirmed through your Instagram. Sorry, I'm gonna make this very quickly. And then I go to bed later that night and on my phone and all of a sudden, my lava lamp went out and my phone kind of went because it on like it was plugged in and I felt a govert like it was like unplugged and then plugged back in. So we had like a power surge. And Andrew text me what the hell,

what the funk was that? And I go, what do you mean? He goes like that you rarely was fun. What the hell was that? A you were like scared and angry. Yeah, you said, what the hell was that? And I go, I think a power surge, like it's back on right and everything's okay, And you were like, yeah, but that was weird. And I was like, I just don't and I think everything's fine, Like that's fine. And then you were just like I think I just got upset because it turned off my TV. And I was like,

I knew it. I knew that. Your response was like you were sad that money I got you had to like restart money, and I had to figure out where I was. I mean, I didn't know if I was four, you know what I mean? Yeah, dude, that didn't apparently here we come. You heardst first, Oh my god, the weekend's coming. What are you gonna do? Are you gonna go out on a boat, You're gonna go out on the lake, You're gonna hit golf balls. You're gonna hate your wife, I hope not. Okay, oh yeah, don't hit

your wife. The swells for everyone out there for sure, UM, have a great time in Attic. They were coming to Atlantic City, the Borgatta, the Music Box. Some people call it the Box, other people call it music Land. Here we go. Listen. If you meet and greets to the Borgata or any of my upcoming shows, if they do get canceled, you can get your money back through the box office. Like you'll find that. And just don't get mad at me if I canceled meeting greets. I'm just

trying not to get Delta. I'm trying not to give you Delta like, but it's it's on a case by case basis. But um, just understand that I'm not doing it because I don't want to meet you. It's just because I'm scared that of that stuff. So um, that's all I want to say. You think Delta will change its name like you think? Because remember when it was Corona and then it was COVID and who's killed still calling it? Someone said coronavirus the other day and I go,

what the funk are you talking about? And we call it like, you know what would be like David fourteen or something. I don't know something because they changed it from Corona to COVID nineteen, so maybe we'll go from David. Anyways. Okay, I can't believe I haven't heard so many jokes about I made a joke last week on stage that San Antonio looked like it wasn't suffering with the Delta variant, it was suffering with the Southwest or the Spirit Airlines variant,

and people fucking loved it. And I go, have we all not made that joke a million times? Right? Like? I think I think Delta has been getting crushed. I feel like the airline for that. Oh, airlines are fucked right now. Anyway, maybe it's in the news. Five parents had to be No, maybe it is in the news. Okay, five parents had to be separate? Did a UKs do after encouraging each other to swear a guess? Oh that's cute, as that's what one of them said. Yeah, so five

parents had to be older African grays. Yeah, these things talk a lot. This is the one that um Pete Lee has. These ones if you want to get a pair of that talks. These are the babies to get. Oh my god, they're so cute, they said. Usually they clam up when they get outside, they don't curse as much, but these five like like they get each other going, you know, oh sweet. But so they had to be separated. It's so cute when a bird knows it's being mischievous.

They are so fucking smart. Dude. What were they saying? Was it in British access so people weren't as upset because it sounded smart still, but yeah, no, maybe they were asking for a cigarette. Yeah, but they added a fun to it, which is also offensive. Yeah, so they had to be separated throughout the Maybe they're asking Matt Damon for a cigarette Matt Damon's daughter. Uh yeah, I I. They didn't say exactly what they were saying, but parents,

they were worried about children hearing them. Although most people loved it obviously, come on, you know what we a cursing parrot exhibit at a zoo would fly off the people. You you go at your own discretion. It's in an enclosed space, so you have to agree that you know kids are watching porn now, like there's no I have not seen are you eighteen or over? Thing? Before a porn site and forever. That's because I have members to them all where I've confirmed that with my credit card.

But um, you know, why are we protecting kids from really fun things, which a parrot cussing, a parent cussing, or a monkey jerking off and then smelling its own ship. I mean, you tell me, I mean, you you tell me. I think parrots cussing are like I've been comparing f Boy Island and reality shows to going to a zoo because people go, it's fake, and I go, zoos are fake, but the animals are living within this fake environment and living real lives, and we watch them and have entertainment

when I watch. If I go to the zoo, people are like, wow, you're cultured and you love animals. If I watch f Boy Island, people are like, you're a narcissist. You're watching for yourself. No, they go, you know that's that's not real TV. And it's like, no, this is like watching human animals act and like jerk off on each other and and cuss, and I just think it is to watch. No, no, no, no, no. People say in general about about reality shows or are it's all fake? Yeah?

I mean that's the number one way that people who think they're smarter than like who don't want to be only are like that are so cool. Like the Taylor Swift song where she goes with some indie record that's much cooler than mine, where she's making fun of Jake Jillen Hall being like, I'm gonna go over here because my anyone who does something to be you know, like, if you don't watch reality TV because you think it's like dumb and not because you actually don't like it,

then you're kid. You're just doing something to present like you're an intellectual and you're not, and actually intellectual people love reality shows because it's like a nature document. It's like Jane goodawling for humans. I'm just we should get a parrot. I fucking curses, dude, dude, I'm ready to get a parrot. I want to get all the time. Can we give him like a certain time because I don't want to be awake? Yeah, you beat it and you don't want it to, and then you stop beating

it when you want it to. It's very no, no, no, they you know, we might get you might get one that bites and that isn't great and like won't even talk. Sometimes you get a parrot that's doesn't talk, you know, like it's just like having a kid. You might get one that's just like not my buddy's dad out of his mouth like and he was kind of like today, And then you would see him with this bird picking food out of his teeth. Oh, I love Keewie. Used to go in my braces and pick out stuff, and

I put his put his whole head in. Because birds have a bunch of feathers around their neck, so their necks are really just the like little bone with some tendons, you know, like it's very little, but their next are all just fluff. So when you put their head in your neck, you can close your mouth around it like you're whistling, and just leave. And it looks like you've just bit off its head because you've closed it around its neck, which is very small, and it's so and

everyone freaks out. But man, I miss Kewie and I missed Brenna. What's the next story. Okay, So the study finds that men who ejaculate speaking of Branna twenty one times a month, we're one third less likely to develop prostate cancer than men who ejaculated only four to seven times a month. I mean, what does study you want? Tell me the percentage again? One times. If you exaculate one times a month, you're one third less likely to develop prostate cancer. Oh damn it, what a weird study.

I'm mean they said that they did it throughout like their twenties to forties, like it was a long study. So but I gotta figure, like, if you're older, you're more likely to get prostate cancer, and you're more likely to jerk off less. But and prostate cancer is one of the easiest ones to survive. Dr drew Um at prostate cancer. I remember he told me he got his prostate removed. He now shoots out nothing, no come because he got his tubes or whatever. His no. The second

the sect of me you shoot blanks Um. You still shoot com but it's like kind of more watery. I think, correct me if I'm wrong with dusties. But then remove your prostate. Nothing comes out literally zip like a ghost. I mean, I honestly, I do not. I don't jerk and I'm going to die tomorrow. I don't jerk off. I jerk off. I think maybe five times a month. Right, you've said every four days. Yeah, so every four so I gotta you're you're gonna be fine, don't jerk off dry?

And then I bruise my own penis. I could rip my own. Yeah, it's a mess down there sometimes when I go to town for two long Yeah, how are you doing with um? Not coming up because your girlfriend's just jerking it more? And uh, you know, my sex drive isn't crazy to begin with, but how's your golf drive? Fantastic? I shot at seventy nine. I broke eighty for the first time yesterday. Oh my god. You want to know a crazy story. Yesterday? Have you ever seen Legend of

Bag of Ants? That movie? No, but I know about it. I was playing and I shot pretty good. I shot a forty on the front nine and then starting on the back nine. Uh, A guy, a black guy just appeared who was wearing like layers, like multiple layers. It was ninety degrees out with two gloves. He was wearing two gloves that weren't even golf gloves. He looked homeless, and he had an old, really old set of clubs

and he was playing in front of me. One like he started writing front and he's like why don't we just pair up? And so I just started playing with this and he goes back of vans and I swear to God, like I don't think he paid to to to play. Did you ask his name? His name was Alan and um and so weird you just make who was wearing layers and ninety degrees? Did you guys talk? Did you ask him about his layers? And it's the

sweater vessel. He goes, I'm sixty with these old clubs because I want to know how hard it is when they used to play. And he was so easy going about bad shots and he was like I thought he was my imagination. After he left, he left before the nine was over, and he just walked off into the woods, and I'm like, did anyone else didn't say goodbye? It was wild and for the first time ever, and I think this guy came to my life. It was pretty like it was pretty wild. That's really amazing. I can't

believe I asked you about golf today. Well I wanted to save it for the pod, but yeah, that is well, um, let's get to uh this. This transitions perfectly into our weekly sports moment. Why do I care about sports? Gears? Andrew's weekly sports moment. Wait, did we throw a fan tracks in there? For a second? There was a little bit of a fan tracks. Listen, it's coming. No one's going to hear that one. We're gonna we're gonna clean it up. Leave it in, bitch, you're slipping slim. Slip

and slipping. You're slipping slim comes from when my dad had a one job the only time you ever waited tables. He was like in over his head. He lied about having experienced just like you have before for a waiter job. And he was delivering someone there's soup and he was sweating a lot because he was just like overwhelmed. And there was like a piece of sweat that just fell in this guy's soup as he set it down. And then the guy just looked at the soup and looked

up with my dad and goes, you're slipping slim. And so I say it all the time, Happy birthday Dad. Alright, moment news, Oh no, wait, I just started reading the ejaculation slipping fat. All right, Yeah, dude, you need to come come Cat on the loose draws M v P, Chance and Bronx at a Yankee Stadium and sets the ground crew off on a wild chase. You gotta watch this. Wait wait wait, wait wait you just so I just saw the headline, So I know what the funk it

is that you were saying. It sounds like you said chance, like like he has a chance, but it's chant like chance. Yes, chance, people chanting cat on the loose draws m v P chance. So people were screaming m v P m v P. Right, So that's another way, you know, another way of saying this. So there was a cat on the loose at a baseball game and the crowd loved it so much they started chanting m v P. That would be a way to read that. Yeah, this is this engse you wanted

to at some point. Oh my god. So this cat looks so scared and so cute. It looks like an asla. So this cat, it's so cute. It's so it's around outfield. It's people are running after Wait, let's hear the chances. How boring baseball is. Because it's a Baltimore Yankees game. You know, people are losing their minds. They're they're chasing this cat around the field. I mean, you guys, there's four guys that are the ones that come out and oh my god, they can't catch it. These they must

feel so dumb. What's dumber than chasing a cat like in front of a bunch of baseball players watching these guys are oh my god, it's like jumping around. These guys are the ones that come out and and lay the little things and then they drag them like rakes. You don't want to grab a cat. A cat's gonna fuck you, you know. Oh, this poor cat is just so scared. The poor kitty. They're just not handling it the right way. Now they are acting like this cat

is a wild beast, like it's a cat. They're freaking out if they you're not catching you guys, you gotta watch this video. The dugout is going crazy that these guys going like you know, yeah, now they're cheering it on like it's like went to the box. It went, Oh he went to go get refreshments. Just got a minor league contract, dude. That cat was incredible. That was a great sports moment. I can't believe it didn't see that on the stadium, Like how does he get to

that field because it was a string. But I'm just saying, like Okay, he climbed the fence. It's a city cat. He climbed the fense, got over it, just crept around, was eating eating mice, eating popcorn, kind of having like a day of it. And then yeah, I don't know, maybe someone brought him and then released it, but dugout and then they just kind of let him be, which was kind of cool as them, like they let him just chill and then he ran out to the field.

But I just love picturing this cat being like like getting to the actual field, like all the things he had to go through. You know, it's like oceans for this cat. I love um. I love that we protect animals once they've become like, you know, this cat is gonna have a great life. No one's gonna take that cat to the pound. Whereas if that cat was just

found outside the stadium, it probably would be euthanized. From the cat of the Yankees, you think, well, you know, that cat is definitely has a story now, so now people want to get it. Like that's why when you get a pet from rescue places. Rescue places do such a service for getting animals adopted, and people don't realize this, but when you know you're going to pet Finder all

these things, the dog or the cat. A lot of times photographers offer their services to or groomers or like people make bow ties for for rescue animals so that they can look cuter for the picture to win over a person that might be looking for a new animal.

And then on top of that, and I don't want accuse anyone, but I do think that stories about these these cats and these animal stories that they come with as a rescue animal are sometimes embellished or complete fabrications in order to give the person who is swiping around for animals, Oh my god, this this animal comes with such a good story. It was found on the streets living in a pizza box and it used a pepperoni

as a pillow. And like then you when you have a story, you want to you want this animal more. Now you get to tell everyone about it. So um, just know that those stories are sometimes lies and be okay with it, because that animal has a story that you don't know about anyway, there's no way to know what its story is. And man, I think if I could have one, if I had like a genie with three wishes, one of them would be to hear Marian

and Luigi's real life story before I got them. I just want to know what happened to them and where they came from, so I can understand why Luigi to get scared of Amazon boxes that I'm carrying, Like who threw a box at you? And where can I go find that person and murder them? Um? I want? Yeah, I mean, you know, Marian got her stitches out today, she's fully I was thinking that has anyone ever said, maybe you've said this before that Marion looks like Nick

Nolty's mug shot. Wow, No, okay, I just sent the picture of a side by side to Jen because she thought we should have dog for merch and I go Marian next, and being like, of a mug shot of maryon next to Nick Nolte's mug shot could be really funny. Well, it really is funny. There's a picture of Marian though that no joke looks identical to Taylor Swift's Um Reputation album cover. I think where she's kind of she kind of has her chin up and she's going like she

kind of looks she has like messier hair. It was her being like and I'm gonna send no oh the side by side because I have it'd saved that I took one time. Jennifer Lawrence Actually, um, we hadn't talked in a bit one time and I posted a side aside of Marion with the Taylor Swift and uh, I remember it was so funny that Jen texted me and was like, holy shit, that's the funniest thing I've ever seen. They look identical. So we'll put her next to Nick Nlte and next to Taylor Swift. You guys see and

send us what you think she looks like. Um, speaking of sending us feedback, let's get to Oh my god, thank you so much to u AVI. What's obviously last name again? Holloway Area Area. Oh, I got it, Holloway, Avia Holloway. Thank you for them for letting us use your voice or whatever that was. It sounded like, I mean, it's I just don't understand how that's even is that?

Are there effects put on that? Or can he sound like that when he's like cooking I put effect on it, But he can sound like that cooking oatmeal for sure. That's so cool. Hold on one second, No, I'm gonna go grab a fan fact facts letter that someone gave to me in San Antonio and I put it on my bag and I didn't read it yet because I wasn't ready for the emotions that it might stir. So one second, well she's gone. Let's talk about Mega Death. How are they doing? They're fine. I think they're putting

out a new album. How's uh Corn Courn I'm not sure about. I'm not a huge fan of Corn, so I don't keep up with him. What about Slip Nah slipnot Uh? The former drummer Joey Jordansen just passed away. That's so fucking sad. What about insane clown Posse? I have no idea. What about Bad Religion? I think they're okay? What about Atol? What are you up to now? I missed? Has no about different bands? Mega Death thrill as good as I can do. Okay, I'm gonna start with this one.

But I just found Okay, this this I got from bestie Sonja, who was at our San Diego show or San Antonio show, and she um, she gave this to Jen who was at the merch booth, to give to me, and I was scared to read it because I was just like feeling too many things last week on the it's a beautiful card, it's pink, It's it's like Taylor Swifty has all these cutouts. It says energy on it, says Nicki Glazer. You know I love that says my

name on it. Anything that's great, says Jack Pott. These it says soap poppy have all the swells, and it says NICKI. Where to begin? I have so much to say. First off, your my Taylor Swift. I am minorly obsessed with you. You have been with me for years now. I heard you on Serious and have been hooked since. I went a little crazy when your pot when You're You Up podcast ended, I was stoked when the new ones started. Thank you so much for all the work you put in. You help me immensely at work. I

find myself cracking up while listening. My coworkers know you as the voices in my head. So happy for your success. Wish you all the best on your tour. I will continue to live vicariously through you. Lots of love, bestie, Sonja. And then there's a little bird um cursing um and at the bottom, No, it's not cursing um. That's so lovely, Sonja. Whenever someone tells me that I'm there Taylor Swift, It's like blows my mind because uh, and but I get it because I you know that I get it. So, UM,

thank you so much. A like that's the greatest gift you could give me, is is saying that, um, that I'm your Taylor Swift because you know what she means to me, like like she means a lot. So I hope that that just I'm gonna cry if I talk about a little bit more. But um, thank you for that personal note. Sonya, thank you for coming to the show. And UM, sorry I didn't get to meet you because I'm guessing that you had meeting grades that I had to cancel. And thanks for not giving me shit about it.

Um and understanding. Let's get to the next letter. Hi, Nikki, Andrew and Noah. This is and from Japan. I'm not Japanese, but I do currently live in Japan. Um. I have a mispronunciation story for you. It was committed by my husband, who was my boyfriend at the time. We were on a group date at a restaurant and when it was my husband's turn to order, he inquired about the minestrone. Oh and of course he was he was not alone

about the ministroni soup. Um. Now, he's from a very small town in Kansas, like two people, so he hadn't been exposed to exotic cuisine. Um, I'm just kidding. Still, we we all kind of cut him some slack, but we also did ridicule and minestrone I love it for a little bit. So he thinks that someone in his pronunciation story, um, I love the pod, keep it up, don't be killed, thanks and things, and from Japan, don't be kick out there in Japan. Um, minestrone is so

funny and like, obviously that looks exactly like minestrone. You know they're not wrong. Her husband isn't wrong, although he does call someone who conducts an orchestra a minestrone. Isn't that a maestro someone that conducts in seel? But um, I was predicting that he was gonna sit My dad and my sister and I one time went to a Japanese restaurant here in St. Louis that was run by a white guy, had just opened and he was like, come on in, folks, can I get you in order

of veta mame? And we were like, I just remember we mocked him relentless, first saying and then one time, my sister and I say peppercini instead of pepper on, yeah, which I guess is the way to do it. It's just ridiculous when you hear someone say peperon cini. But one time we let we ordered pepperon Peppercini's, and this guy goes, yeah, I can get you a little loord

of pepperon Cini's, And we mocked him. The way we giggled at him probably made him feel really sad, like how much two little girls were laughing at him, saying, so he I hate gro and Euro. I used to work in the middle Euro. I say Yerro, but you know what, there's some tell shut up? He pricks. Anyways, what's next? No, it's it's yero, But yeah, I love a good mispronunciation. Minestrone or minestrone. Uh? What's the minecraft? Mini Craft? Mini Craft is what a lot of teens

are playing. Adrian, Hey Nikki, Hey no, Andrew, that was a weird order. Andrew is not going to be happy about that one. My name is Adrian, I'm Switzerland. I'm a huge fan of the podcast. Didn't do it every morning? You guys always like the first hoses that here in the morning, which is kind of cool. I have a hay babe moment to share with you guys. Um, as I mentioned, I'm from Switzerland. We speak Swiss German, but

there's also a French and an Italian part. So I remember my dad once talked to me in Italian and I guess I repeated something because then he told me I have a very sexy accent, which is kind of weird to your own song. Um, yeah, no kidding, that was my hey baby Momentum, keep up. I agree with your dad and listen to your podcast and don't we care. I'm also really trying to spread the word about and

people really seem to enjoy it. By guys, Oh, Adrian hot Adrian, doesn't he kind of remind you of Gleb? Like does he like his the accent, even though it's not glob is so sexy that anyone that kind of reminds me of his His struggles with English, which he doesn't really even struggle with, like, kind of turns me on that. I guess it just we ring something in

your head. Yeah, I agree with dad, Yeah, I dude, there's something too about him being like it's French German with Italian and I know he knows all the things, but the fact that his dad said he sounds sexy when he was a sexy Italian accent just comment. And by the way, when he said I have a hay babe moment, I go, what the funk is he talking about? Like, I don't even know. I didn't even know we were doing those. I love that we're doing those. I think we had one, uh fan trax one time where someone

had shared a story. Let's get more of those, guys. Hey, babe moments are so funny. My dad is full of them. Um, always complimenting me about my looks because again, I look like my dad, and so I think it's more of him like being like, I like her legs because they look like mine. But um, yeah, it's very uncomfortable. It Uh it sends shivers through your spine. They don't mean it in a creepy way. It doesn't make it any less worse. Um. Trying to think of one that happened recently.

Oh oh that today he goes on face time. In fact, he goes how you feeling. I was like, oh, I'm good. I haven't seen him in a while and he goes, you look good, and I go, Dad, I just woke up. I have disgusting hair, Like I didn't look good. I don't want to hear him go you look good. It's just like, this is why I don't FaceTime you. I don't want to hear that I look good. Even even that gives me kind of like creeps in a way that, uh,

because I didn't look good. He was like, it's almost the way like a lover thinks the person, you know what I mean, Like you look good, but I don't like you look healthy. You look like I look like, yeah, oh god, I don't want my dad to say it looks like I have any fluid in my face. My Dad's like, I'm feeling like my prostates really okay, Maybe I'll get to twenty two this month. I got twenty Yeah, those months with the extra, the trying to jerk off

keep his prostate healthy. But he can't come. He's just like, I gotta come to save my pros. Date. Is there a what's that one song? The Green Day song with one? I feel like they don't say twenty one in it, though, but I wanted to make some kind of Green Day reference last time when we were talking about last time, when you were talking about the the coming but the hay babe moments. Has your mom ever complimented your looks

in a way that made you feel unsafe? She like, she always has a thing to say about how I look, whether it's my beard or you like, I don't like it. I feel like it's um Like she goes, you're my handsome boy. That's your mom. That's impression of your mom that you do. I don't. I think her mom come like, would say stuff about her looks and then she would complain about her mom and then do the exact same thing to us about our looks. And it was just passive,

it wasn't you know. So you know, there was always like a little jab of what you're looking, like, what you're wearing. My grandma used to say, you got my mother's eyes. You got my mother's green eyes. But you get like really into it, like I like your green eyes. Oh you got my mother's eyes. She would always slurp, and it was weird. Yeah, but you love you. I think you have a little bit of pride and and I think you get a little bit tickled when ladies

in your family have said that it doesn't. It's good you're telling me. It made you creeped out. You weren't like a little proud boy. Not proud when when my grandma says that I have my mom's eyes or her mom's eyes, or just like you have beautiful green eyes, you didn't have a little feeling like kind of special for me. It really doesn't. Like my mom says I look good one day, then I kind of have that same thing where I'm like, well, how shitty did I look last time I was down here? Yes, yes, my

mom does that too. The other day, my mom was over and she had to go to a pool party later in the day, and she was just like, I don't want to go to this fucking thing. I have to be in a swimsuit. And I knew that one of the women there was going to be like, it's kind of like a has a rock and bod. She's younger than my mom, and um, and I go, I know you're feeling insecure. Let's let's have a little pep talk. So I made my mom come into my bathroom and stare into her own eyes and say, um, I love

you for making um for I love my body. It um works. I get to hug my kid, my grandkids. I get to stand up right right now. I get to be able to move about. I get to come over and hang out with my daughter because I have mobility. My body is amazing. It's pushed two kids. I'm mean to repeat all of this, and she was just like, I don't want to do it. But I was just trying to like celebrate what, like a sixty two year old woman shouldn't I think I shouldn't try to look

hot in a suit. That shouldn't be a burden for you anymore, you know what I mean. But it doesn't mean that it's not still a struggle. Final thought, I put out of a thing less like on the podcast, probably a month ago at this point. Maybe more of like if you are going to a pool party and you need help, you're about to be in a swimsuit around someone, DM me and I'll help you. I UM.

I got this message from a girl who was like, I'm about to go on this trip with girls that are like do spin classes and work out all the time. They look amazing, and I'm about to feel like I don't look that way. I have no time to like change that what am I going to do? And I forget what I wrote to her, but it was so good that it helped me and I'm gonna I want to find it so I can read it to you guys.

But it made me realize, like I'm thinking about writing a book or I'm starting to wrap my head about what I want to write a book about. And I think it's going to be that stuff of like helping people, not like just helping people accept themselves and and also

helping myself accept myself because acceptance is truly it. But the thing that I want to just keep sharing that maybe didn't get through to you guys, that has always helped me and maybe it doesn't help you, but this for whatever reason, like I wish I would have had this tool or this kind of logic before, like you know, a year ago when I finally got it, but like when I feel fat or ugly or my asses just has extra cheeks on it or no cheeks, no, it's

always like more like just baggy skin like no, but just like no fat, just like skin like just you know, sometimes I look I said it before, I look like you know when a you know, when a supermodel gets elderly, and You're like, damn, she's still kind of hot, but she's like an elder I love the I'm a thirty seven woman with the body of an elderly supermodel. And that's not me tooting my own horn. Like that's just

kind of how it is. And I'll take it. It's good, uh, you know, But um, when I'm feeling bad about my body and and mad at like god, white, didn't I work out this week? Why did I eat that? Blah blah blah. And I've said this before, but it just helps me to repeat, um, because I'm having that with my hair recently, I'm having it with my face. Um, my eyes are kind of like drooping and like just

things I'm seeing aging wise. If I I just now, I think, Nikki, if you could snap your fingers and not have this, you would you would not have it, right, Yeah, Nikki, of course you would. You don't want this thing right now, that look that is making you sad. So because you would change it if you could, doesn't that mean you can't and that you would if you could, but you can't. But but I could have gone to the gym for the past couple of months. I could have not eaten

all that ship on the couch or whatever. Well you you, that's stuff that you did. You also didn't really have a choice to do that either. You let yourself off the don't beat yourself up for that stuff. That stuff you did because it's better than fucking working out or whatever. You needed to do that stuff. If you wanted to

work out, you would have um. So when you feel bad about how fat you are, or how ugly you look, or like just your closer stain, like all those things you don't want, you didn't actively spill stuff on yourself. You didn't actively pull your face down because you want to look ugly. Maybe you did, maybe, but but I'm guessing you didn't want to feel fat today. So just recognize that, Andrew, Like you don't want to have a receding hairline. So it's not your fault because if it

were up to you, you wouldn't have one. So we don't, don't you. When you take it out of your hands, when you make it not your fault and your head, then then it becomes something that you can't get mad at yourself about. So this is just a mind trick too, a limit and it's in a couple of people have shared that it's worked for them, like they stopped and they go, Okay, would I want if I could sell my fingers, would my thighs be smaller? Yes? Okay, well

that so I definitely don't want this. So I didn't choose this. So just accept it. Because we when things happened to us in life that we don't have anything to do with that, we don't feel it fault with. We don't beat ourselves up about it. We go, God, I didn't want that. I didn't choose it. Life just served me that fuck. All right, Well, moving on. But when we when we think we're the claw of it, that we actually chose it, that's when the that's when

it's we can't get through it. So if you feel fat, tell yourself, did I choose to feel this way? Yeah? Nicky, because I ate a bunch of ship and I'm a lazy piece of sh it. No, you aren't. You didn't choose to eat that stuff. You had no choice. You had to finish that box of cookies. If you had a choice, you wouldn't have done it. Because no one wants to eat a whole box of cookies and make

themselves sick. You had no choice, so let yourself off the hook because you're just trying to soothe a feeling inside that feels uncomfortable, and cookies were your only way to do it, and not going to a work cut classes your only way to do it, and sitting on the couch was the only way to do it. So Also, I just want to share one Reddit thing that made me laugh so fucking hard, and it's honestly kind of the opposite of all of this, But this is going

to be the last thing I say. This made me laugh in bed yesterday so fucking hard, and I can't save it for the Reddit dump because it's too good. Someone goes, Okay, this made me laugh so hard. It's from life Pro Tips and it said life Pro Tip LPT buy clothes that fit you. Nobody is looking at you and going, wow, look at that dude fitting in a medium shirt. They're thinking, look at this walking vacuum

sealed bag of marshallows. Maybe laugh so hard because the idea that someone would be like, Dude, that guy's fitting in a medium shirt. He's fucking killing it. Like we I have so many times been like I don't want to wear that dress. Because I know that size that I feel best at, and that size is not the size, but the thing is I would have squeeze into that dress. No one knows what size that. No one's going, wow, Nikki fit into that dress unless I'm putting the tag

out there for people to see. No one cares where things that fit like. I think that's that's that's kind of fat shaming and I don't like that about that. But it made me laugh that sometimes we have this sense of pride that we fit in things that no one cares its size as it is, like, just be comfortable. And so if you need to buy a bigger size of something, don't throw away the smaller size thing. Buy the bigger size and have it around for those days

because it's going to happen to everyone. Everyone will be some kind of shape they don't want to be at some point. And um, except Giselle. She seems to not ever happen. I know, I know. It's really nice to know. And Tom Brady will still love her then because he'll still be alive. She won't. But he's not going, He's not. He has fake hair, all right, Well, wouldn't you if you had all that money and yeah, you're probably gonna get it pretty soon. I wouldn't get a fake hair.

Why let's cliffhanger. Okay, we'll see you next week and we'll figure out why Andrew will never get fake hair. Have all the smells this weekend, don't we get and uh you know it didn't didn't gag. Sorry m