The Nikki Glaser Podcast Glazers.
Hello here, I am Snicky Glazer Podcast. Welcome to the show. It's Nicky Glazer. I'm here with Brian Frangie. I'm not here with him, but he's here on Indian Spirit. Yeah, I mean and more than that video. I see your face moving.
That's audio.
You're actually you're not here in spirit. That's the linking you are here in for me. How's how's your going?
Uh? Mine's going good. I uh, I'm doing all right. Well, you know, I'm doing terrible as usual, but I'm me and I my headspace is decent, which is good.
Oh okay.
I feel like now this is an interesting time. This is probably this is obviously not more interesting than your last two weeks, which have been a whirlwind, roller coaster ride of insanity. Yes, but I feel like this period is the frequently and not talked about period, which I would like to call the reflections period, where things start to slow down and now you're like, what just happened? Yeah? And how do I feel now?
Yeah? That's a good point. Thank you for the dovetailing this into about me after I asked you how you were doing well. I don't want to do good headspace.
I don't want to spiral into you know what am I going to talk about? You know, everything that's going wrong?
Let's talk about Well, let me guess your you can't sleep, your teeth hurt, your dog is restless, and your wife is happy and her spirits are high, which can be annoying at times. There's uh, coconuts fallen down from pine cones are starting to fall.
Yeah. No, it's in the season where the pine cones are falling and it's dangerous out there.
Yeah.
I can't even go outside my house without worrying.
Yeah. Well, we'll get into your anxieties because I think it all tracks together of like all the things. You know, Uh, we're we're all going through things right now. If you're not going through something, get out. Yeah.
You know. Someone once told me I was like complaining about something. It was like I was confiding in a friend over lunch about a problem.
Big mistake.
I know, that was my first mistake. You can't confide in friends. That's what you go that's what you go to the anything.
Yeah.
So I was talking to him and he said this thing, and it made me so mad. He goes, well, everyone's dealing with something and I wanted to jump across the table and cut his head off with a butter knife.
So why are people so bad at being friends or like just saying the right thing like this whole? Haven't Haven't we all seen enough memes of like when people say they're starving kids, not memes, but just like culturally we make fun of like, well they're starving kids in Africa. Stop complaining or whatever it is that it don't We all know that it doesn't matter, and that yes, we have it better than any group of people in the history of human like human beings existing for thousands of years,
we have a better hundreds of thousands of years. We have a better than any of them lifestyle wise, and yet we're all miserable. It doesn't matter because the reason we're miserable is because we feel lack of purpose. Because we used to always just be hunting and gathering, trying to stay alive, trying to not get eaten, trying to make sure our babies don't die, trying to find drinking water. Like we were consumed with purpose and ye every waking second, and you didn't have time to get depressed.
Wait wait, wait, wait, so you're telling me the cavemen weren't dealing with seventeen different types of pillows and not knowing which one is going to be best for your nick.
I mean, I wonder at what point they realized, like that some of them were getting different moss that would resemble like a temp repedic, you know, like and we're upgrading, and then that moss became like you like, at what point, Yeah, there.
Was probable point the caveman moss become an issue. I mean, probably right around the time that Jesus said came around.
Yeah. I mean, honestly, Brian, our issues, your issues with the pillows, it's it's bigger than that. It's it's deeper. There's something else going on. All of the things that I worry about are just masking for some other thing in my life that I'm not ready to address. I mean, my wrist has been hurting recently, like carbal Tunnel, and man, I've been doing such a good job of every time it acts up, I just go, it's all in my head.
It's all in my head. It's all in my head, And this isn't real, This isn't an injury, this isn't my I'm picturing like where it's hurting and that it's enflamed and there's tendonitis. Even so I just go, it's all in my head and it's been going away. When I do that, oh really, yeah, it works, yeah, and it goes And then it starts hurting again when I start stressing about this very specific thing in my life
a volleyball game I have coming up. No, it starts hurting immediately when I start stressing about a specific area of my life that I'm stressed about. And then there's this back injury I have that you know, always flares up when there's some kind of stress going on, and I always go, no, I twisted it in pilates or whatever I tell myself, which could be true. Like I was aggravating things in plates one day and then I was I couldn't move my neck for a couple days.
But I also was going through a ton of stress. And I think it's that I would I'm not like people who want to be injured. I would rather it be in my head.
That is.
That's why I think I can get over these things so quickly, because as soon as I go it's in your head. I really accept that and then it goes away, which is the sort of it. You have to accept it.
The beauty of it is even if you do have an injury like a muscle pull, not not if your like bone is broken or something, but if you have a muscle pull or strain or something like that, and you just make your head say it's fine, it's okay, then even though it's injured and it's hurting, your brain learns to kind of ignore it and you just kind of proceed and it's like, yeah, it's kind of annoying and kind of limiting, but it becomes pushed back into
the depths of your consciousness so that you're not really focused on it and it doesn't bother you.
Yeah, pain can be mitigated, pain can be lessened. Like your pain is your nerves feeling something, and you can psychologically, you can kind of turn off your nerves with meditation and with mindfulness. Like it actually does work and it doesn't take away from the fact that you are injured. But what it does take away from is the fact that you get to complain like you don't have control over it, and that's something people really like to do. And the fact is you can have control over it.
You just have to do things that seem kind of woo woo and hard and and you know, and maybe you don't want to do them, and you don't have control over it because you're the type of person that will never believe in that stuff and you were born that way and you can't help it. So you deserve to feel your pain. It's all okay. But I will say in talking about the it's we're two weeks out of the roast. Yeah, the night my life changed from
New York. I was in New York. I just got back from I did a week of press right after the roast. I did a week of press in LA for my special. My special came out that next Saturday, and then I did. I flew from LA to New York and did a week three days of press in New York, two days really, but I was there three days for my special and you know, obviously the rows stuff. And then I flew back Thursday to Saint Louis. Was
there for or Wednesday night. Was there Thursday, and then went to go see my dad play music Thursday night, fun Little Saint Louis Night, and then Friday was in Vegas, UH for two shows with David Spade Friday and Saturday. Those were sold out. They haven't been before.
Something something changed.
I mean they were close. Yeah, grown Ups three is in the mix being being floated. No, I don't know. So that was really fun and those shows were just so fun. And I got to hang with friends and relax by the pool during the day and it was just a great time. And then came home to Saint Louis on Sunday and today is Tuesday, and I'm feeling it's a little weird being back and feeling like, but
I'm not. I'm not having the crash because I knew there would be of like if I led this attention in too much, and I'm too like, Oh my god, my life is so good right now. Everyone loves me, everyone wants a piece of me. My numbers are going up. I just knew it would go away because it's the it will, and so I I didn't let it into much. I led it in enough. I'm proud of myself, which I don't think pride is a good quality. So I'm I'm grateful for everything how my life landed up here.
I'm grateful that for everything that led me to doing well at that roast, the hard work, the people who helped me, the parents who believed in me to even have this career, being a woman born in a country that can even say dirty things like all the things that led me to believe.
To be the man that the garbage man. You know, without them, you wouldn't even have.
You have garbage, Yes that I have. I hit a garbage sport. Did I tell you that?
Yeah?
I know. When I was in high school, I hit a garbagevan with my car and I went to he sued me, and yeah, it was a whole thing. No, I actually won. They divvied up the blame. They said I was thirty percent to blame and he was seventy percent, and so we only had to pay him thirty percent of what he was asking, which was ideal because if he would have gotten zero, he would have just appealed it.
So it was honestly, our lawyers were like, thirty percent is exactly what you want because any lower he would have done it again.
Right, Oh god, you know these garbage men have been getting off too easy for too long.
And I'll just tell you, never speed and I wasn't speeding, but never always cautiously go past the garbage truck because they will jump out. They might not hear your car. It might be like one of those like I've avoided so many different pedestrian incidents because I've just been I'm obsessed with not hitting someone again.
Yeah, well, they're you know, they're constantly jumping off. It's like Universal Studio. It's like it's like they're just jumping off and jumping out from behind the truck and garing you.
And because they don't they're not thinking. It's they wake up at four o'clock in the morning to pick up trash and they have to jump off the do you have the guys it's the used to be the guys that hang off the back of the truck and they have to physically get off and dump and now and at least in Culver City, it's like the arms that go out the mechanical arms that grab.
We have both.
Yeah.
Yeah, those guys were jumping off, but they are very savvy about what when to jump and when not like usually they are. I was in an area when I hit a garbage man. It was at night. It was about it was like dust.
Garbage man in the morning.
No, sorry, not dust ran at night, like dusk is like when the sun's going down, right, Like it was probably like dusk is down. Yeah, So it was around six o'clock, which in my neighborhood we only have garbage been in the morning, and so.
Why would a garbageman be out at night. It's so weird.
So I was I thought it was parked like, I didn't even think, so I just went past it at a normal speed and then he jumped out. And then when I was on trial, they were making me out to be some like kind of white privileged yeah bitch,
because he was. He was not a white man. And I think it was about like, she just is driving recklessly and doesn't care about black people, and she was and it was just like and I said, I do think it was part of the I do think it was part of their prosecution, was to make me out. And and you know, so.
If it was a white garbage man, you would have swerved.
Around if it was not even that. It was just like maybe it wasn't about him being black, It was about me being white and entitled and not. And I was in an area of my town that had garbage men pick up at night, So I guess that made that a poorer part of town or something, and I'm from the elitist part of town where because I said, I never knew garbage men worked past the morning or like, you know, midday, I'd never seen a garbage truck out. And they're like, oh, so the neighborhoods you go in,
garbage men only work in the morning. They like, well, it's just I don't know.
I don't know garbage pick up white. I didn't even know that.
That's how I just thought that was when they pick it up.
I just know, so they go to the white neighborhoods first, and then if they have time, they'll go to the black neighborhoods and pick up the garbage.
I don't think it was it was. It was more because I was not in a It was just in an area that was probably not as well off as mine, right. And so they also made me, the woman made me out to be like you were just driving la la La.
I'm not even joking you. This was the first stand up thing I've ever did, because I was on the stand and she was this woman defending this guy, and she goes, so you were with your friend blaring music, just driving la la la la la, just driving down the road and I go, well, I didn't look like that, and it killed. Dude. The whole jury laughed because I just go, I didn't look like that, and it I mean, it was I'm not even joking you was the first
time publicly I had gotten laughter. I think i'd start started stand up the next year, or maybe I was still doing something. It was just there was something about it that I was like, ooh, that killed. And then I had them on my side because.
You're in the when said that, Yeah, I was on the witness stand and the microphone out of the witness stand I dropped walking around.
I took it out and then I dropped it. Wow, yeah, it was great.
I said, you're gonna have to pay for that.
That's actually yeah, we'll put that towards that thirty percent.
You wo.
They know it was. It was an interesting trial. The craziest part of the trial was I really I've said this on podcasts before, so I'm sorry if long term besties have heard this many times. They were I think it was gonna go like fifty to fifty. Maybe maybe they were even gonna give me more of the blame. And I swear to God this happened. I'm on the stand, and oh no, I'm not on the stand. I'm in I'm like sitted at sitted. I'm seated at the you know where OJ sat or whatever, you know, like where
you sit on the trial. I'm just like thinking of.
Like, yeah, on his wife's corpse.
Yeah, and and my his he's on the stand. The guy that I hit, which, by the way, when I hit him, I hit him and he was taken away an ambulance, and I tried to get information about what happened to him, and I never heard anything until four years later, right before the statute ran out, we get a call from his lawyer. Suit then I had to go do a deposition. Taylor had to go do a deposition. Taylor mcgath, she was in the car with me and so I'm on the rondage.
Did some great sound effects during her deposition sound effects. She is, well, she always makes noises.
Yeah, she's good at noises and she's good at and then she was like, I'm not good to do that, and we were like, oh no, yeah, I could see her doing that.
No.
We were listening to Z one oh seven, probably loudly, but that's like allowed. It's not like I would have not hit a garbage man if.
I wasn't remember the song.
No, but I'm sure it was something like jaw rules, like everybody want to live it up? What do I do every mony? I don't live it up?
Ru Maybe that would have helped you, you know, Fiona Apple bullshit and you're like, actually it was jaw.
You hit a black man, but at least you're supporting black excellence in pop music. No, I am. I went over to his body because he was laying in the grass. He had jumped up and I hit his legs. So if he hadn't jumped, he would have gone under and it would have been horrible.
He was laying in the ground.
Dude, I hit a man severely, Like I'm not getting you like trauma, like from this. I almost killed a man.
So he dropped from behind the truck.
So he I was driving. Our car's got parallel right, My car is going there. We're facing different directions. He's on the side of street. I think he's parked because it's a garbage truck past hours and it's I don't see lights, I don't see moving it's and it's a dusk, and I doubt he had lights on, because I don't
think we did. And my car, my mom's land cruiser, little white bitch driving our mom's big old land Cruiser, gets parallel with the back of his truck and he jumps out to get a garbage can across the street. And I see him run out. We lock eyes. It is slow motion, and he jumps and then my car just hits his legs and he goesubling into the street and then into the grassy knoll. Yeah, he's laying in a grassy knoll. And I pull forward, like I stop, and then I look at Taylor and I'm like, oh
my god. And then I start laughing because that is a response, a trauma response. I found out. I felt really embarrassed about laughing before because there's nothing funny about it, but I just couldn't. I thought it was a dream kind of and so I just had to laugh because it was just my like a lot of times ridiculous. They will see people, like even rape victims will like laugh before it when it's happening, or like when people are getting you know, it's a common response to being terrified.
And so I remember laughing and then I remember feeling really bad about laughing, and so I stopped. And then there was a part of me that was like, just run, just go, just drive, like I do see the psychology behind a hit and run, because there is this thing in you that's like fight or flight and you're about to either go to prison. And also I hate seeing bloody injuries, and so I was like, I'm the first
on the scene. I'm I know all of this is sound horrible, and if you've never lived something like it, you can totally point at me and be like, you're not compassionate. You didn't get up. I just I don't like gore and I was too scared to see it.
And I and you're a teenager, remember that?
Yeah? Can everyone remember I was sixteen and my brain had not developed properly, so I didn't run obviously, But I will say I don't even need to share the fact that I thought that. I'm only sharing it because I do. I did feel it, and I didn't. And then my mom had a car phone, like one of the first car phones, you know, the ones that would like latch on and have the big buttets on the outside. So I called nine to one one and I didn't want to get out of the car because I was so scared.
But that's her white privilege help the situation.
There we go, We're one of the first ones with carphone, and I think we had one nineteen ninety five and so then and this is too who this is yeah, two thousand. So then he uh so. Then I got out and all of his garbage truck friends colleagues are surrounding him, and then one of them comes up to me and is like, he's always jumping out. I told him this was gonna happen. He's never looking out. That really helped. Well. That guy changed his story by the
time he gets to the stand. But I swear to God that I only remember it not because I was like trying to find evidence it wasn't my fault. I remember it because he said it so many times to me and was trying to calm me down and was like, this is not your fault over and over and over, and so I remembered it because I needed that. And so by the time we were sued four years later, that guy was mum on that kind of language, and I was only my hearsay. But on the on during
the trial, we got to go to break. He is on the stand and his attorney and I know I've told this before, so I really I'm sorry. We'll talk about other things after this. His attorney is cross examining him and asks him, have you ever been charged with a felony? He said yes. We're like, hmm, what was the charge? Child molestation?
Oh? God, well it's over.
It was over. I don't feel like it's fair that it was over. But my side of things, we didn't even know about that my side, And I promise you this really happened. He said that I waited about twenty seconds so it wouldn't be connected. But I turned around. My mom was in the very back of the courtroom, and I just looked at her and raised my eyebrows, like this is done. Because the whole jury had already
laughed at my joke. They were kind of like making fun of the circus that was his attorneys that were being so buffoonish in interrogating me. And then they find out he's a child molester, and it's just like, you're not going to give that guy money, And it's not fair because it shouldn't be connected and he should not have to be judged for that, but it did come up and his atturny he brought it up.
No one even asked attorney sucks. That's what happens when you don't have money to afford and it's probably like a cheap billboard attorney or something. But you're a hero, Nikki Glazer, right around town running down child molesters. You're a hero in the end.
Yes, But you know, that's my advice. If you do hit someone with your car, which we are all very prone to hitting someone with our car because pedestrian hits are up so much in this country because of distracted driving, just hit someone who has been charged with molesting a child before. Now it's hard to get charge those people, but you can just tell, you know, in the way. Yeah. I don't know how you are supposed to tell someone's chid moluster, but chances are they are. But have they
got to cot with it? I don't know. Okay, we have to go to break not everyone's child molestor I was just joking. Okay, be back up with this. All right, we are back. Let's do it quick before we get into anything else. Noah, update, oh, because people are dying to know what's going on. So she has been a mom since Let's see, what did she tell us? Oh wait, no, that's not the right threat. Okay, here we go. She has been a mom since Saturday, April twenty seventh, twenty
twenty four. Wow. Congratulations, Noah, congratulations, Noah. It's a palindrome birthday if you shortened the year. So four two seven two four cool two that's cool. Her baby's name is Toby tob Y Leah ku Lawi k u la w y Toby Leah Kuwali cool lawi. Yeah, yeah, No.
The last names yeah yeah, Kalawi.
Okay, that is her husband's last name. Toby is her name. She's so cute. Wow.
So Toby kind of like a guy's name as for a girl. Usually it's like a unisex name, which I like.
Yeah, it kind of is. Toby's are such a like it's for a girl that's just such a girl who's like precocious, knows who she is. I really do feel like names dictate how someone is going to be, and Toby is not going to be like soft spoken and scared and insecure. Toby just like knows who she is right out of the gate. You literally can't be a Toby. Who's I don't think.
I'm not sure.
Yeah, I think I'm trying to think if I've met at Toby.
Is there besides Toby Keith. I don't know any other Toby's and.
I haven't met him. No, I don't really know, but I think Toby is like a great name. It was really uh, it's satisfied with that decision. She's just so cute. She's sent a lot of pictures to me into the girl's chat. Toby is a beautiful little girl. She has Noah's I told her Noah that she has her eyes and Noah's like, I don't see it. I keep seeing AVI. What did Noah say? Yeah, she said that she sees av No. Hold on, I have scrolled because we had a huge conversation. Oh my god, oh yeah Toby, Oh
my god, she's so cute. Yeah, she is happy. And I'm going to post this conversation that we had because I go, how's tobes and she goes she sucks, and I said and then I wrote, ha ha ha, and she goes on my boobs all the time. I was like, I like that.
Noah, Yeah, so good timing.
Yeah, right, She's like she says it's nice that she's filling in and not so much like Gelatine, so it's easier to handle her. Yeah, yeah, she's really happy, and she just like we haven't talked a ton and heard her on the Girl's Chat in a ton, but I have let no one know that she has been missed and that not only the fans missed her, but we
miss her and I miss her on girls Chat. But she's just like in moms zone right now, which I'm interested to find out from her, how like if it's boring, if she wishes she were doing other stuff, or is it just so fascinating all the time that you birth this thing that you're kind of not bored, or are you on your phone a lot? Like do you still care about the stuff you used to care about now that you've brought a baby into this world?
Interesting questions, yeah, And I don't know the answers, but I do know what my brother went through, and I can tell you that they all say that they're just exhausted constantly. They can't think about like stuff they're interested in because they're just tired. No, thank you, Yeah, that's what, But I don't know. That's not my experience I never have.
Some people can have some people can have it all and still be But also you almost don't want to be interested in the same things you were interested in because your life. That's why you had a kid, was to bring meaning to your life, and you didn't want your meaning to be like watching tiktoks all day like you wanted more, And so it always makes me laugh. I love Lisa Tragger's joke about how she's like my
friend who had kid. She's like, it's changed me, and she's like, no, I just think now you're like you're still an anorexic with but now you just have a kid. Like you think that people won't care about stuff they used to, but I think, Noah, Noah is still like I'm looking at our chat and I'm like, oh, I want to find Toby stuff, and it's like all stuff.
She's like asking about my life, and so she's still like a really good friend, really present, is it making everything about being a mom when she really could, like I want to just say to all of my friends with babies. Literally, I was like, send me a daily
Toby picture. I would There's no part of me that would not want to look at a picture of my best friend's baby, like it's just other babies not so much, but like, especially like men who have babies, like I don't really care because I just I mean, I'll look at them, but I don't care as much as when a when a mom I know has a baby, I'm so much more like, show me everything about it. I've noticed that when men are like, this is my baby,
I'm just like, and where's your wife? Show me a picture of her, like, let's celebrate her for a second happens.
I mean, you know, the you just kind of like lose track of your spouse when you have a kid.
Not that would be really hard for me as someone who who likes attention that I would be very pregnant. I would get so much attention, which I think is you know, I've said and I'm working on a bit about if you want as much attention as being a celebrity of my stature gives you, you should get engaged and talk about it a lot. Just mention you're engaged, and people will have so many questions for you and be very interested in your life. And also being pregnant
is a ton of attention. And then you have a baby you don't look as you don't you look a little bit pregnant, but if anyone does think you're still pregnant, it's really insulting to you. It's not like a fun feeling to be thought of as pregnant when you're not anymore.
And then people you're at home a lot because you're not bringing the baby out, so all of a sudden, you went from being like out and about with your stomach and looking so cute, and everyone's going, oh, what are you do all this attention to like you have the baby. Then you get a flood of text, You're sending a bunch of stuff to family members, and then the baby's just it has to drop off. It has to be a similar thing to what I'm going through
of like so much attention. Now everyone's seen it, Like everyone that's seen the Roast is going to see the Roast. It was number one on Netflix for two weeks, over two weeks, and now it's not. It's trickling down the top ten, and I feel it going like, oh no, but everyone who's going to see it has seen it, and it's millions and millions and millions of people. Yes, but there is less attention less fun.
I have a baby to distract you from the lack of attention.
That's that's true. I don't well. What I will say is I'm having more responsibility because of the roast things are, things are being brought my way, and there's a lot of like, Okay, you did this thing, and now people are want more from you. Now you have just so there's something that needs the industry needs to suckle at those teats.
I mean, the fact that UTA made a car about you is insane.
It's so for those who don't know, Like my agency is UTA and.
Which is one of the top four agencies, and there's only four agencies that are really big and they represent like every single star in the known universe.
Yeah, like Brad Pitt's at my agency, you know, like it's it's and I only know that because and I don't I don't even want to. I can't even say how I feel about it. I like am grateful for my agents. I really love all of them. But sometimes I forget where I'm at. Like I literally I've been at so many agencies. I'm like I think I'm at ut Like it's changed so much and people change. But I do love the individual people, but the agency itself
like the brand. I'm like, it's interchangeable to me, no offense to.
What they be good, but in general it can I have.
A sports literally, I have a sports agent now, Brian, I have Jerry. I'm not even joking you. I have a sports agent. His name isn't Yes, his name is Ryan. I'm so sorry, Ryan, I'm not remembering your last name. But he is such a sports agent. He was you know, I was on a zoom with all of them to kind of like come together and be like what's going on.
And because I've been like a little bit of a darling in the you know, in the sports world, because of the roast and and because I was able to say I don't know much about football in my roast set, so no one it can expect me to know much about football. I'm like squarely aligned with what I can bring to the NFL, which is jokes about an outsider's perspective that doesn't have to do with knowing exactly how
the game works. Like, I really feel comfortable working with the NFL because they know who I am and they don't want anything from me that isn't what I gave it that roast, and I can give it that roast. So I'm desp I like, can't wait to work with the NFL. So uh, and I am getting into football in a real way. Like I the other night, I woke Chris up in the middle of the night to be like, Okay, if they go for the conversion, do
they like, how many yards do they move back? Because I couldn't find I was watching a tutorial on YouTube and they kind of just skipped over it. And I'm like, no, we don't understand what it means to and and Chris that it can depend He said, anywhere from like three yards to seven.
If I go for a two point conversion, yeah, like after a touchdown.
Well wait, is there a one point conversion that's.
Just called the extra point when you kick it through the.
Yeah, that's just a kick. But if okay, so if they're going for the two point conversion, I'm sorry, I thought the conversion was just the play. Okay, if they're going for the two point conversion, how many yards back?
I don't know. I think it's like five.
Why would you guys know that? That seems like an important thing to know, Like as soon as they changed it and yeah, he s something changed it.
Yeah, I think it's five. I'm not sure, to be honest.
Well, it's something you should know. Yeah, it wasn't a question because it just was like talked about anyway I and then so anyway I have Yeah, I have a sports agent now and he is. He was like a little bit more ballbustery than all the other ones on the call. He was like, and I love Jerry Maguire
and that's my probably top five favorite movie. And it was giving that and I really I just like the sports people because they remind me of comics because they talk shit and they're really honest, and there's just like a I don't know, I think the sports world in the comic world is really there's the Venn diagram is of kind of like personalities is pretty is almost a circle.
Yeah, this makes so much sense. And it's not something I ever would have like predicted for you or would have even like been like, you know what, you should like try to go into this field, But now that it's here and it's happening, it just makes so much sense that Nicki Glazer would be a sports NFL comedian. You're just that you have the right personality, you have the right types of jokes. I think it makes perfect sense in my mind. But I would have never predicted it.
No ever, And that's great. I love when things happen in my career that I'm not like aiming for, because then it always feels like I manipulated somehow to get it, and this is just a natural thing. It's like I like you and you like me. Oh my god, okay, let's start dating. Like, yeah, I didn't even consider dating you. It just feels like kind of just a meetcute of sorts, and so, but yeah, Uta made a post about me and my friend Dan Levy, not the one from Shit's Creek,
but Dan Levy. Uh, he's a comedian. He's written a bunch of stuff. He's one of my favorite people. Comedian Dan Levy spelled the same way as the other one, but he he DMed me first and was like, oh, you know, you've made it when Uta posts about you, and I was like, oh my god. And so I joked in my story and I was like, thank you, my agency. And I hope people didn't think I was
actually being like thank you my agency. It was just I was calling out that like an entity is celebrating me and then an entity that literally is like, let's just be honest, like they are into me because I'm hot right now, and like, yes, they've believed in me in certain ways, but they got on board once I was. You know, they'll get rid of me when I'm not hot, and I won't take any offense because that's just the way this business works, and I expect it.
That's more ag but that happens more frequent with age. I feel like managers will hold on to you a little bit longer.
Yeah, they wait.
Agents are like brutal, Yeah.
I And that's the way it should be. Like they're fuck boys, you know, like they're really They're gonna make you have a great fucking time, but don't trust them for the longhime. And that is what I realized. Show business is. You cannot get into showbiz thinking that you are. It's not a marriage that's gonna last forever. You will be divorced, you will separate. You might you might stay married but sleep in separate bedrooms the rest of your
life and always resent each other. But at some point, unless you are maybe William Shatner or Betty White and I've talked about this before it's it is a relationship I am entering into knowing it will not be forever, and it's just the way it is. And there's the illusion that it's going to be forever because you're hot right now and how could this go away? But every piece of evidence, aside from a couple people, leads me
to believe it will not be forever. And if it is, it will never be at the level that you think
it will be. It will ebb and flow. And so I'm excited for this time in my life right now, and I'm just working on figuring out what I want to do next, because that's the I've always been able to just kind of go I don't know, I'll see what I want to do when it comes up, Like I don't have any real goals, and now it's like, well, you can kind of do anything you want, like what do you want to make who do you want to
make it with? And like people are excited, like it's just it's it's awesome, And but I also have to think, do I want to spend my life on a movie set? Do I want to send my life working on a movie script with someone who might be great at writing movies. But isn't that good of a hang? And the truth is no, I don't care that much because it is all fleeting. So if I win an Academy Award for a comedy which has never been done but could be,
even that will be forgotten some day. It's all It's about doing, working with fun people, and working with people you admire. So I'm just consuming a lot right now to be like, what kind of stuff, Where's there a deficit in in movies and TV that I want to fill that I would want to watch and what I want to make something that is that thing? And right
now I'm thinking rom com movie. Rom com is something I'm I'm like starting to imagine what that would look like for me, because I watched a couple rom coms last week, namely The Idea of You, which is Anna Hathaway going to a Coachella and meeting a boy band guy who is almost half her age. And that was a movie that I saw, and true, now I have to feel now I feel a little bit cagey about
talking shit. But here's the thing. I don't feel bad talking shit about the movies because I know that the people that made these movies probably set out to make a great movie, and the script was probably great, and the studios fucked it up. So I can always shit on things knowing and not really offend to me. I'm not attacking the writer or the performers or the directory necessarily, who I think has a big hand and whether something
looks good. I can always rely on the fact that probably the studio got in there and fucked this up and made it unwatchable and made it insulting to people who are watching it and are trying to actually be challenged with how they think and where they see things going. There's no challenge.
Coming from the writer's side of it. I can say that there's probably a fifty percent chance that the writer sucks and they wrote a shitty script and okay, they're just not funny.
Well, I want to just air on the side of the studios fucking it up, because it's easier to come after a conglomerate. Is that the word than it is in an individual? Yeah, technical away in silver Lake.
I'm just same with agents. It's like, there can be good agents, there could be good writers, but there's so many of them that are not good. Yea, there's so many of them that are bad. It's it's mind boggling.
Well, yeah, I don't know how it happened. And same with comedians. There's so many bad comedians that are successful because I think the problem is and I don't want to sound elitist because I was. I just think that some people are there needs to be entertainment for dumb people. Yeah, it is. There are a lot of dumb people in the world. And I'm saying dumb with with no judgment that that dumb. It's just no, I'm not even judging it. It's just a fact they have lower intelligence than other people.
It doesn't mean that they should die. It doesn't mean I think they deserve worse lives. It just is true that there are people with less intelligence that also deserve to have a good time at the cinema, and they are pro creating more than people who aren't. Like you know, the one movie that no one like wasn't as popular as it should be because people are dumb. Yeah, ideocracy,
it's it's inderocracy. So those people. When I get frustrated a comedian who I think is just not challenging anyone doing the most hacked stuff, I'm like, but and they're selling out places. I go, well, these people are enjoying it. They're not like lying to themselves. They actually are and they deserve to have fun too. And just because they aren't as intelligent doesn't mean that they deserve less or
I need to like hate them. I can be frustrated with them because I want them to, because I think with less intelligence comes less compassion and less kindness and all and less introspection that leads to a better world. So I get frustrated with the unintelligent people, but I'm not mad that they like dumb things. I'm over that thing. I'm like, Okay, this is for this isn't for me, and not because and by the way, Oppenheimer's not for me because I'm too stupid. So there's always something that's
for someone else. Like I'm.
No, here's the beauty of it. If you're smart, you can enjoy the dumb stuff too. You can go like, oh, I'm gonna I'm gonna put I'm gonna put myself on that head to have a good time.
No, I don't. I don't think I can. No, you know what, Yes, I can, because I can watch it ironically and I can pause it and make fun of how dumb they think we are, and why that makes any fucking sense that that guy would like, Okay, we're gonna go to break and I'm gonna come back and talk about the idea of you, which is the Anne Hathaway movie where she meets a guy to Coachella. And I'm also gonna talk about the Sydney Sweeney movie anywhere
but here. And then I watched another one whatever it is. Literally, these titles are terrible, too, terrible. What's the one with Jennifer Lawrence? Another bad title that I cannot no strings attached or no feelings hurt the kid not kid, but like, yeah, it's all.
It's and then becomes a garbage band and gets hit by a teenager and I think there.
Is a garbage man involved in that movie. But anyway, I want to talk about women's I want to talk about sex scenes after this in rom comms. And if you've seen these movies, which I know you girls have bussy's. I know some of you have seen them. If not, you need to watch them because they are entertaining to make fun of and there's a little bit of fun in them too, when you let yourself go and you go, baby,
that could be me meeting that guy after this. Okay, So we put on the Idea of You the other night because I'm like, okay, what's the state of the rom com right now? And I've been wanting to see the idea of You I heard. It really kind of indulges women in this desire to meet a celebrity and fall in love, which is something we all kind of fantasize about. You run into the raw. You you're trying to find the bathroom at Coachella, which who even knows
how she got back to those trailers. That wasn't really addressed, but she walks into a trailer and she imagine this, Imagine some you're at Coachella in a tent and and you have to go to the bathroom, and you ask where's the bathroom? And they go this way, So you go, you walk that way, and that way just takes you out into a field with a bunch of trailers. Now, wouldn't you figure those trailers are for people that are performing at the event you're at, and that maybe they're
not your bathroom. What don't you maybe find someone else and go are their porta potties? Not this girl. She just walks into a trailer. The trailer is seemingly empty when she walks in, and then she walks to the bathroom of the trailer and she tries to open it and there's someone in there. Now, what would you or anyone else do?
And that's hot girl dumb. She she she's been, she's not due her, but she's going without reason art.
Gallery and silver Lake. She is a she is a.
Well respectrabled privilege.
She has bangs and a daughter, and she wears flowy dresses.
But she's a hot girl. Like it's hot girl privilege because she's been.
Doing stuff like that the way hot, which is like super hot but like also approachable and can kind of like that's even worse. Register is like quirky and she you know, it's a movie.
In the movie. I think they're trying to say that everyone's agreed, agreeing in the movie that she's a hot person.
But this is not This is not hot girl privilege. They're not trying to be like, she just walks. This is just they're trying to paint a picture in which this could happen to you. So you walk into a trailer and you knock on the door. You try to open the bathroom of the trailer and there's someone in there, what would you, and literally everyone in the world do.
I would if there's someone in the trailer I knocked on it, I would probably say, oh my.
God, you're inside the trailer and you knock on the bathroom of the trail.
Oh my god. I Well, first of all, I wouldn't even be in that situation. I wouldn't have the gall to walk into a trailer and try to find the bathroom.
Literally, no one would.
That person would probably call the police. Would I would say, Oh my god, I'm so sorry. I didn't realize that this was a trailer.
Perfect answer, Yeah, I shouldn't even be here. I'm sorry that I'm knocking on your trailer door, your bathroom trailer door. Instead, she sits and waits for the bathroom to be open.
Wow.
And so then this hot guy comes out. He looks exactly like Matt Ryan.
Oh lucky.
And this guy is so hot and young, and he's supposed to be twenty four but he's really twenty nine. And she's supposed to be forty but she's really forty two. And her daughter is supposed to be sixteen and is literally twenty three. It is so dumb. Her daughter, but being her daughter who looks twenty three, goes to summer camp with like a pillow und her arm, like a sleepover summer camp at one point while her mom is off banging this rock star pop star who's in a
band called us. It's called like August Moon, that's the name of it. And yeah, yeah, totally. And so my problem is sex scenes, and the sex scenes now are
not like actual sex. What they do in these shows now is the woman will the guy will start will approach her from behind and start kissing her neck and they'll kind of kiss while she's in front of him, and then there will be a arm that like you see his hand like go down, and then you know he's fingering her because clothes aren't coming off, and then she will have a full blown orgasm on camera where she is acting a fool yo like it happened with
the Natalie Portman thing, where she's like simulating sex in that pet in that fish tank area in that movie that she did with Julian Moore that everyone loved and I didn't. I'm tired of watching these amazing actresses. No, no, no, it was the one where she did she I like panned it because I didn't understand it was suposed to be ironical. No, no, no. Natalie Portman was in a movie that was the last Oscar season.
She was like.
Nominated for mm okay. I think it was with Julianne Moore and then julian Moore fucked a kid in high school. That yeah, that one.
The garbage got it.
Yeah, so so she. But but I'm so tired of watching women orgasm on camera. Is very vulnerable. I would honestly rather see them just get like full penetrated. Would rather see titch shaking and like getting slammed, then this girl going and then going like oh and like biting her lip. And it's like there is something going on in Hollywood right now where people like to see women orgasm. And by the way, we never have to see the guy orgasm, not that anyone wants to see that, but
we never ever see him. He's just stoically fingering and kind of just like looking hot and cool while she he's writhing around like she's having an exorcism. And it's so embarrassing, and I really think actresses need to stand the fuck up and maybe they wanted to do this and say I'm not gonna do porn for you because why like.
People, it feels like they want to, Like like did Emma Stone want to that? And poor things? She was like basically it was like a porn for her for a lot of it. Did she say I want to do this because it's like as sexuality.
I'm sure she did, because she seems like someone that I listen no matter how much you think you want to do things. The fact that it's even written in is part is because a man, because they know women having sex cells, you don't need to show sex all the time. And I'm someone who loves pornography, I obviously love to talk about sex very openly. I don't feel like I need a sex scene in every fucking movie. I think that making out is enough. Even that grosses
me out. Sometimes we know what sex looks like, hopefully we've all seen it, and so you can just have a couple laying down kissing and then waking up in the morning.
Niki, it's all you need, your Mormon phase, your puritan phase.
Final thought, I just think it's taking advantage of women to have to writhe around and have orgasms on an otherwise PG. Thirteen movie, and it gets away with being PG thirteen because it's not explicit the guy.
What if you saw the guy orgasm too, would that make it fair and easy? Yes?
Yes, absolutely, yes, yes, but it wouldn't be because for some reason that's disgusting and are hilarious.
A man orgasming is one of the funniest things on planet Earth.
I think. I think the whole discussion of like women being women having sexist beautiful and men not is not beautiful is a way for them to convince women that it's art when we have to come on camera and to make us do it more so it's artistic, and
men it's gross and it's like, no, it's all. If you're trying to portray what really happens in the world, you need to show the man coming too, And in fact, you should show the woman coming a lot less and you should show her not coming fucking ten seconds after he starts touching her. Yeah, it's insane, And I just don't want to see Anna Hathaway orgasming, and I don't want to see who else Sidney Sweeney orgasming in a shower, And we didn't need to see her nipples in that scene.
I hope she got paid so fucking much for that shower scene where you see her nipple for a half a second. Sidney, see, yeah, you see her nipple.
Well, you see her nipple in Euphoria a lot too, So she's known for showing her nipples.
Good for her. Which if I my tits look like that too, I would show them off. But I just find it, like I just I just think there's some corsion involved in I don't want to take anything from these women who have full autonomy over themselves. I just think that if it's written in the script for you to be topless, yeah you can negotiate how topless, But why do we need to be topless? Can't Sidney Sweety's talent speak for itself.
I don't know. But if it's like seeing a movie where Sidney Sweeney is not topless is like watching of Michael Jordan.
Well then maybe we don't put Sidney Sweeney in things. If we have her talent can't stand alone without seeing her nipple, we don't put her in things. I don't think that's what you should do. I like Sidney Sweeney's acting, but I think that if it's not good enough and you have to show her tits.
Maybe maybe, but it's like she's got this great trick that she could perform, and it's like you don't do it, you listen, don't have to do it every time, but it is like it is it gives her a leg up.
I just picture a male director behind the camera like it's I just and and I don't mean to take anything from these women. This is gonna get to wait for this to show up on a fucking page. Six. Nikki Glazer slam Sidney Sweeney for not standing up for yourself at an hour.
I defend Sidney Sweeney. I think she should be allowed to show her tits and anything she wants. It's perfectly fine. I'm on her side on this one.
I am also offside and I I just pose nude for Peta. You can see my full tit minus my nipple. You can see everything. It's coming out. I think it'll be out tomorrow, which is the day this comes out, So go check out my pa ad. I am fully nude, and I did it because I like the campaign, because it's for Peta, and I support Peta and any kind of attention Pita gets will be great. And if my nude body gets more eyes on the fact that you shouldn't wear fur or you know, leather, then great or wool.
But also I wanted to get naked. I am in a place in my life where i'm can And yes, Sidney Sweeney might be in a place in her life too where she can get naked and feel really good about it, and she should be because she looks amazing. But I just feel there's just an inkling in me that we are being served this because we don't feel like it's good enough on its own.
And I think your inklings are correct. I mean it, definitely there's been men saying that this is what you need to do in order to succeed. But I do feel like this new generation of people, these new generations, are more comfort with nudity for some reason.
As they should be. And you know what I am, I'm kind of changing my mind. Page six, Stop writing your little headline about me shaming Anne Hathaway and Sidney Sweeney. I hope you listen to this far because I keep getting clipped by page six for these fucking things I say on podcasts that are so out of context. It is a nightmare. And like I truly I said about
Ben Affleck. I said on We Might Be Drunk the podcast, I said, they were talking about Ben Affleck's performance at the roast, and I was like, oh, I think I know what happened. Like he didn't take it seriously. He thought it was probably beneath him. This was just a speculation. He thought it was beneath him, and he didn't prepare
as much as he should. And I said, which I have done a million times in my career, where you don't know how big something's going to be, and you do kind of think it's beneath you and you kind of phone it in. I literally empathized with him. I didn't say it was a bad choice on his part. I didn't slam him. It was. But no one's going to listen to the podcast. They're just gonna see that I slammed Ben Affleck. Especially Ben Affleck, if you ever saw that, I'd be embarrassed.
To meet him. Now.
Shit, I know I know he's he's getting slammed so much in the media that he's not going to pay attention. That's what I told my dad, because my dad was like, you need to find Ben Affleck and tell him you didn't mean that. I'm like, he doesn't care to.
I know that's all bullshit. But at page six, if you are listening, I want you to write into the article that straight white male comedian Brian Frangie defended Sidney Sweeney's right to go topless in any movie that she wants.
I I want her to go topless too in all things, because they are amazing and they're fun to look at, and she is so sexy and it does, I guess, add to her character. But I and I will also say, they gave us a lot of Glenn Powell nude and I do appreciate that. I want to say from the bottom of my heart that, and they definitely there was a There was a dick in that movie. It wasn't Glenn Powell's. I wouldn't mind seeing his in a movie
coming up if he feels like that. He's at a point in his career where his acting needs that help. Not saying that's what Sidney even thinks, but I do. I did appreciate a very naked Glenn Pale throughout it, and as a woman, I felt scene and I was glad for that. So I guess it was even, but I don't want to see any more orgasming on for our sex scenes. Give me. If you're gonna have a sex scene, make it nude, make it messy. Let's get in there. Let's let's actually have a sex scene. Let's
make this an R rated thing. Don't keep a PG and have people orgasming because it is.
That's interesting now, absolutely.
Indecent for little kids to go to a PG thirteen thing and see a woman thriving around and having convulsions.
Now I'm on board. I get what you're saying. It's like, if you're gonna do a sex scene, then do a sex scene. Don't just throw in. Don't throw a towel over a woman and see her riding and be like that's not sex. It's like that joke that Luis c k joke about the N word, where if like you said the N word, now I know I'm now I'm saying it in my head. Now you're making me say it, you piece of shit. Yeah, same thing with the sex scene. It's like we know what they're doing. The kids are
subconsciously knowing what they're doing. It's like where you're imagining it now, Well.
I want to you know what, as a kid watching that, I'd go like, what is he doing to her? And what is what's what's happening to her? Is she being electrocuted? Like it? With more information and more of a context, I think that it would be less confusion and less like kind of scarring because it is. Please go watch the scene where she's getting fingered by the guy. It's probably three quarters of it's probably half the way through the movie, half of the way, half the way through the movie.
Half the way through the movie. But the but sex, it should be a kiss on the cheek. And then we just assume.
I watched Mister and Missus Smith last night because I was craving some actual chemistry between two leads, which I will say Saidie Sweeny and Glen Pell had amazing chemistry. YEA loved it. And then but mister and Missus Smith, Holy shit what. I lost interest immediately because I don't like action, so I'd stopped any scene where there was like shooting going on. I wasn't I was on my phone. But the Jennifer Aniston didn't stand a chance having her husband come back from that film.
Oh yeah, no. Like similarly, Ben affleck did you watch Deep Water?
Oh? Yeah, I know you're a big fan of that. That was fucking steamy as shit.
Yea, and they they were together.
I love watching movies where they got together. That's why I went back and watched Mister and Missus Smith because I go, I know they were fooled around during this. I can't imagine how hot it is and it was pretty good. All Right, we have to go. Thank you so much for joining us. We'll be back tomorrow on the podcast Besties Are the Best. You know, we love you. You're my number one fans, You're my ogs. We have a lot of new listeners, welcome to the show. It
is this every time. And we do have some Taylor Swift gush Fest episode coming up on Friday that I want to warn people about. That is if you're a new bestie and you're not a Taylor Swift ted, you might go, what the fuck is this? That episode's not for you. It's just bonus content for like Swifty besties, and it really is. You will not understand it and you will be almost mad at me for the way
I talk on it. So I wouldn't recommend listening to that unless you're swifty, but we will have two episodes this week normally. So bye Brian, bye, and wish Noah all the love for Toby who's born on April twenty seventh. And and I know she misses you, guys and misses hearing from you, So shoot her a note if you if you feel inclined to congratulate her and to keep her company. That's all for the show. Brian is gone, he went to a doctor's appointment. My producer who's filling
in Olivia is I think in the other room. And so I'm all alone, just talking to Nolan. You guys are the best, Dobeka and come see me on tour. So many new dates coming out Kikeyglazer dot com. New one's added for June, so I'm coming to Chandler Arizona. That one was just freshly announced. But there's so many because you know, I'm having a moment, So dates are filling up a new David, So if you haven't took my dates in a while, go do that. Nicki Glazer dot com and I can't wait to see what I
have show love you guys, me in Abe. Good Bye,