The nick A Gliser Podcast.
O Gliser, here's Nikki. Hello, here I am It's Nicky Glazer podcast. Welcome to the show. I'm in Saint Louis, Missouri, alone in studio. My sister was maybe gonna make an appearance on this show today, but she couldn't get a babysitter. And when she floated the idea to my parents yesterday, where she was like, Nikki asks me to be on the podcast, and they were all hanging out. That's when they're supposed to go, We'll watch the kids while you do it, she said they didn't. They didn't pick up
the bait. What if they brought the kids.
I'm extra microphones. Wouldn't they bring What did she bring the kids?
That would be such hell to listen to? It's hell to be around when you love them more than anything you've ever loved anything. So I think if you're just a podcast listener, it would truly be a hell on earth to listen to those screaming kids. It'd be cute at first and maybe interesting. We could do something with it, I believe me. It crossed my mind. But then it also crossed my mind that they would we would get
in a good conversation. The kids would wander around my apartment and there would be something a very tragic image befell my brain and I don't want to go into what I thought about, but it's like I want to high rise. Okay, so a little eric a plan? Yeah, Michael Jackson, No, no, no, Michael Jackson is the best way that could end. Just a dangling baby is different than one that drops to his death. So yes, yes, yes,
but you read a hit song about it. I think I never I never got why people are like he wrote a song about it, he made he profited off his kid's death. Sorry that he felt his feelings and that's what came out.
I don't think it was thoms that made art.
Are you supposed to just put that song up for charity to keep windows, to have better regulations for windows and high rises? Is that what you're supposed to do with that money so you don't profit off your son's death.
I'm sure as soon as his son hurdle to his death, he was like, yes, another song.
It just starts, Oh, that's wonderful tonight, hold on what wonderful?
What if?
Wonderful? Tonight was the song that was inSpot it's just a totally different song. We're like, wait, not Tears in Heaven. Like no, I just realized in that moment how much I was connected with my wife because they weren't gonna have this thing between us anymore.
He's like, no, I wrote Tears and Heaven purely for the money. The other one was my kid that.
Would manifest it. I actually wrote Tears in Heaven prior too such a tragic thing. But I wrote a song the other day and I started crying when I was singing. I told the girls chat Thus it's embarrassing to admit to the public, but I I just felt so. And I mean this just humorously, but it also is the first word that came to my mind when I started crying to the own thing that I was singing to myself that I had just written. I felt gay, like I felt it like the middle school definition middle school
nineteen ninety seven definition of gay. And I'm not thinking about gay people when I say that, and I hope it gay people know I mean that, and I'm just using it for humor. I'm sorry if it hurt your feelings, but I just felt I felt embarrassed. But then I was talking to. But then it's so crazy because right after it happened and I was like, oh, are you crying to your little song, Nikki?
Are you feeling your feelings?
But I also was like I felt it and it passed through me. And then I picked up which I have right on my shelf in my kitchen actually, so that I've always put it there so someday I would just be like, I'm just gonna pick this up and read it, and I fugin did, and it's Jeff Tweeties how to Write One Song. So I was just and it's kind of a small book. It looks like a what a bathroom read, like what's of a coffee table book, but not big one that you can pick up and
just like read an excerpt. And it's not like a thing. So it's it's the size of its inviting. And I just picked up went to a random chapter and I sat down in like this. I had this like circular chair in my living room that's out of place because I always pictured putting it in a nook where I would read, like into a nook of a room because it's like this big, like yeah, but it's like it's just what you would envision if you were like, because you can put your whole body on it and tuck
into it. It's big circle, white and a perfect circle, and it has a and it's just small enough and you just feel like it's my two people, it's too uncomfortable, but one person it's perfect. And I always envisioned myself like having this in a kook to read, but it's always just been in the middle of my living room and no one sits on it, and we just put guitar hero on it. But I took a tar hero off and I sat in that nook and I turned it to face my balcony because sometimes I want to
be on my balcony, but it's too thin. It's the tiniest, thinnest balcony you'll ever see. Walk past people. If you're walking with two people, you literally brush up against the person so that you're, oh, yeah, you got to be indoors to dangle the baby because your arms extend past the length or the width of it. Yeah, it's so I So I was like, so it was so perfect. I use the couch, I read this book. That was what I was doing at the time, and then I also put my phone on the other couch. Get out
of your phone. I don't want to be distracted. I'm going to read an actual book that's not on my phone, which is very much not how I read. And then I faced it to the balcony and opened the window, you know, the sliding window, and so I'm like on the balcony, but like just outside of it, like it's right outside. A bird fly in. No the best part
of it. That's Noah's nightmare. And mine would be like if a bird suddenly was attracted to me and like liked the bliss I was putting out in the world and I felt like snow white, and it like came to me and wanted to be on my arm. I would be the happiest girl in the world. And that's so funny, Noah, that that is your absolute nightmare. I want to say. I love birds. I just don't like them in enclosed spaces with me. Because the fear is
the wings will This is like in the face. This is like the get your hair.
It's like the chick from Love is Blind that you sent yes. So this is a common fear and I do not judge it. I was so happy to hear that someone else has this in I do wear.
Poke holes in it. So what is the fear.
Though, I'm okay, just like case seeing the birds slam into the ceiling and then just like drop on me.
Yeah, that's not fun either, seeing a little bird get injured and scared. It's freakish.
Yeah, and then it freaks out on my face.
Oh okay, so there we go. So it's going to your face to freak out, and then will the it will like for me, a bird in my face. I don't want it's dander in my mouth. I don't mind the wings hitting me in the face. That seems kind of cool. I don't want the dander. Is that the freak scratches beak sharp beak in my eye, beak in your eye? Okay, that's a logical fear. Honestly that it sounds like horrible. Okay, so what happened in the story, But let me just poke a hole in it with
my beak, Okay, a poke hole in your eye. Of logic, birds under duress are not going to like attack. The only way it's beak would go in your eyes by mistake, and it would probably not happen because you're gonna close your eyes in defense already, so it would be a really freakish accident to happen. And also they're gonna try to get the fuck away from you. They're never gonna fly into you. A bird that flies in your house wants nothing to do with the thing that's moving that
it doesn't recognize in the enclosure with it. It's gonna go the opposite side of the room. In my in my experience of trying to catch birds in houses, which is one of my favorite activities, because I want to like get them to love me and trust me, and then I slowly can just take it out on my finger. It's never happened that way. I always had to put a blanket over it gently and then like carry it in the blanket. But I it's they do they do not want anything to do with you. But I that
being said, continue your fears. It's who cares, Okay, not like you encounter it that often. It's not like I'm like, no, you gotta get inside a room with a bird. It's like no other experience. Because some fears are like that where you hear people are like scared to do something, and you go, like people who are scared of flying, You're missing out on a lot of life by doing that. And I know you say no, I take the train
and I can drive. You can't get placed, you can't get you can't drive to Italy, you know, and take a boat and you're not going to You're not.
Scared of the gigantic pine cones in my neighborhood I've mentioned before. Oh yeah, on the grenade sized grenade heavy, Like you're aware.
Of them, so you're not going to get hit. It's probably you should be scared for other people.
I'm scared. Well, I'm scared that of the one day that I don't think about. Yes, that's what happens. That's like, no, she's the one day she opens the screen in her windows.
I don't think hitting, but getting hit by a pine cone that kills you instantly is the worst way to go. I think it's I put it on a list of one preferable ways for me to go because it's funny. Yeah, it's memorable. Ye're crowd if you're a few old in public. Yeah, I don't know about the crowd. I don't really want
a lot of people to witness it. I'd like few witnesses, so I'd like the story to take on a tale of its own because there's such few witnesses, So I'd like it to become the stuff of lore and then it gets spread around and then my death is like almost. Uh. There's some people who's you only know about because they died. I e. Eric Clefton's son. I bet he'd be We wouldn't know who he is now maybe we would, who knows? You know what I'm saying. It's just like some people
become immortalized by their death. Yeah, WHOA Like I'm trying to think of Well, I just follow a lot of accounts on Reddit. Maybe people wouldn't. This wouldn't come to mind for you, this kind of thought of like, oh, yeah, I know that person because they died, but I have you know, the Falling Man on nine to eleven, Like that person's famous, even though they didn't weren't able to identify it. The dust Woman on nine to eleven.
Well, the falling picture. The Falling Man on nine to eleven invented the snuggie, so he would have been remembered. That was the same guy.
Wait, the Snuggy pre dated nine to eleven so much, and the Falling Man certainly did not survive.
That the falling man invented the snuggie and now and then he'd fell out a nine to eleven famously.
Oh he so he dropped the glans for the snuggie and then someone found those plans twenty twenty years later, fifteen years later.
Yeah, pretty much. Well what about the guy who invented the what's that thing you ride on with the tours? And he fell off? Uh oh seg Yeah, the guy who meanted fell off a cliff on the segue. Yeah, it's pretty funny.
That was That was really funny. What are other funny ways that you just go? Not funny, but like I just want it to be oh stink I mean Steve Irwin.
Oh yeah, that's ironic. Well it's not ironic, it's expected, like that's the way he was gonna go.
Yet it isn't ironic. You're right. It wouldn't go in that Alanis mooreset song. Yeah, because it's ironic in the sense that, like the things he attacked ended up attacking him. I guess that's ironic, but he.
It would go in the Alantis Morris set song because the Alantis morrisset song is famously not ironic.
No, I think those ones past the test. Let's go through them. It's like ten thousand spoons when all you needed is a knife. Very ironic. It's like meeting the man out of your dreams and then meeting his beautiful wife. Not ironic, No, not ironic.
What about this? You you're a die aetition and you die by a vending machine falling on you. Ironic, that's ironic.
What if you're an old man who turns ninety eight, you win the lottery and then you die the next day? Ummmm, you play the lottery every day.
If you're a guy, if it's ironic, if if you're nine, just I think, if you're ninety eight and then you win the lottery and then you die, that's just bad luck. It would be irony. If you said I'm never going to play the lottery of my entire life, and then on your ninety eighth birthday for the first time, you play and you win and then you die. Maybe that's ironic.
Or if you say, yeah, the next day, I'm going to quit my job and then life quits you or said made some stock, or but if you played the lottery every day and then you you win on the day right before you die, That is, to me, is ironic.
But if it's just like, oh, a random guy plays the lottery at ninety eight and he does next day, it's a little iron I don't know who's to be the judge of this, certainly not me, an English major who never won book her entire college career but somehow got a major in English.
So talk about when you did read the book on the couch, because that's where we are.
So then, okay, thank you, Noah. So I'm no birds fly in unfortunately, and I'm reading this chapter and Jeff Tweety, who wrote the book How to Write One Song, and it's such a good book. It literally is talking to you like you're like you could be any level of musician and you'd get something from this. Like I felt really seen as someone who was like really scared to
write a song. And anyway, I had read half of it, but I didn't finish it because I wasn't ready to write a song and I didn't want to fail the book. So that was ages ago. So I picked it up and just went to a chapter that I hadn't read yet, and it was about how sometimes you'll write lyrics and or he you know, I'm reading and reading, and then he says, sometimes I write a lyric that will make me cry, and it doesn't happen that often, but sometimes I like, I figure out how I feel about something
while I'm writing it. And he was like, and those are the moments that make me want to write this book because I want everyone to have that feeling, because I feel like, yeah, you're not an artist in that way, like I had never I've never cried a joke I wrote because I was like, oh my god, I do love them or what you know, and I will miss them when they're dead. Like no joke has ever made me like feel my feelings. Really it's anything to push them away.
Because I've never read a joke it makes you laugh.
Yeah, that's a feeling.
I guess that's how you know it's a good joke, or that at least you'll like it.
Yeah, or anger. It makes the anger that I have about the subject is funny, Yeah, because I get then being angry, as Brian and I both partaken. When we get angrier, it gets people tend to laugh harder.
Yeah. Yeah, right. That's been the hardest thing for me is to recognize, like you get so caught up in the fucking algorithm and what does the fucking algorithm want that you lose sight of the fact that if it makes you laugh, if it makes you feel something, then it's worth putting out there. It's a difficult think they remember. I know.
That's the hard one is like, but sometimes I don't know. I don't laugh at everything I do, but I think I see other people laugh at it, and I go, oh, there's some value here, Like I I do trust other people think, like know what's funny, and I don't. Sometimes because there's sometimes where I'm like, I don't like that joke at all, but people laugh and I keep doing
it even though it doesn't make me laugh. I'm like it bring it's obviously clicking for people, and I did think of it, so there's some part of me that did think it was funny and initially.
No, that's true too. Sometimes that happens where where I'm like, you think this is funny, and it's like, I guess it's my best joke. Now I don't know.
Well, sometimes they laugh and you don't. You don't know you're being funny. Like I will say something and I'll literally like I'll like, well, why do you guys all laugh? And they'll all laugh in a way that it's like one of my like a closer. I'm like, it's like I had control over them to do that. They kind of laugh where you're like boom, I know this and they all light up. It's like that kind of laugh and you're like, what the fuck did I just reveal
about myself? Resonated? Why was that funny? And sometimes I can catch it, but so bad at going back and listening to myself. Like this weekend, I was riffing, and I was like, I said, I had a really fun riff and what is it? I'll share it? And well, I had two. I had grand Rapids was so fun. I riffed. I was rift central and I was like, oh my god, this is like I mean, maybe I'm the I just don't riff on stage that much, so anything new will always kill. I actually have to experiment
with it more. But it just felt like the idea of it being new was so fun in the way I was. I was excited to tell it's it's a joke about scratching your dog and like make like when you scratch your dog. I think I've talked about it on the podcast maybe and it looks like you're making them come like when they get that, like there were tails, their foot starts shaking, and they're like, it's just like we're just all as a family gathered around being like,
look at her, calm, like jet that's something. It's just kind of weird that we do that, because there's no difference, truly no difference. So I was working that out and then I had some other thoughts about stuff that are really fun. But then I had this riff that I had not planned the next night about oh. I just for some reason, in the middle of telling a joke about OH, I was talking about getting comed in. Of course, naturally, I was talking about how it feels good to have
to get comd in. It like literally does feel good. It's it feels satisfying in some way that most men will never understand, and but it does feel good, and it's less clean up. And I was talking about that if you stay horizontal, you don't have to clean it up till the morning, you know, And and I was like, you'll have a raging uti, but you will have you know, staved off having to clean up. Yeah, you get to
go to sleep, because then I go. I just stopped and I was like, wait, does everyone here know that if you don't pee after sex, you have like an eighty percent chance of getting a UTI, like a woman has to. Yeah, I don't know if it's at a certain age, but for me, and that is like I I would never skip peeing after sex ever, ever, ever, uh, because it is just too risky. No, do you agree with me on this?
I agree with you, But from personal experience, I have not gotten a UTI because up after sex because I did not pee after sex.
I just wanted to go to sleep, and you did not get into uti. No, but I I've only gotten might be in that twenty percent. That's what I'm talking about. Yeah, every time one uti my whole life, I'd never got them, and I had friends that would get them chronically, and then I had and I was really proud of myself, like I must be a better woman. My my pH bolence must be like on point cause it's like it's like a it's kind of yeasty. I think when you
get a UTI, it's just a bacterial infection. Anyways, when you're not better, get a little way lots, something happens that makes you feel like you have to go pee. Ladies, it will happen to you at some point. You will go, what is this. I have to pee but I can't pee and I maybe have to shit to and it all feels clogged up and feels dirty down there, and there might be an odor, and you're just like, what
the fuck. It's a UTI and you have to go to fucking urgent care because there's nothing over the counter. So what it does is just inconvenience your fucking life because you got to go to urgent care. You gotta sign up, and you gotta watch what number you are on the urgent care so you can show up right before. AZO doesn't do shit, which once it's.
Locked, it gets it. It reduces your symptoms. I've heard.
Okay, I understand that, but it's not gonna treat it like you have a bacterial infection you need. That's just gonna like you have to go to the urgent care at some point.
You would never have a.
Doctor's friend for me my ut I have. The only one that I got when I was like thirteen or fourteen was because of antibiotics.
Is that ironic? Wow?
Yeah, that's ironic. That's in the song.
Yeah, that is put it in the song Let's call Atlantis. But I just was like, do does everyone here know that we have to do that? And I guess men I'd have to do it as well. But women were really just there's too much mixing around on there, and you gotta flush it out right after you have sex
to get all the mouth stuff. There's there's fingers and mouths and just get it out of that ureathroat hamster and then not for the hamster it But I said, unless you have a partner who you can pee on during sex, and then that would then you get it out. I mean you maybe have a little but like or something about like oh no, I said that. It was a riff about That's why I date guys that like to pee on me because it reminds me to pee.
They're peeing in my mouth so they can come and I'm like, oh yeah, I gotta remember to peep for this. Like I like the idea of girl, a girl having something heinous done to her and she's like, thanks for the reminder. It made me laugh a lot, and I even it didn't even do that well, but it was so funny to me that. I was like, someone write that down. It's just like what an artist someone write down. Peeing in your guy, peeing in your mouth reminds you
to pee after sex. Yeah, and I said that out loud inside a uh, you know, theater that's mainly meant for orchestral performances because I'm an artist. Okay, let's go to break. Come see us this weekend in Cincinnati and in Gary, Indiana. That's Friday night and Saturday night, Gary first, and then Cincinnati is gonna be great shows. And then a bunch a bunch of tour dates coming up this summer just announced. Just go to Nikki Glazer dot com and you can check those tour dates and come see me.
The shows have been so fun, it's gonna be a big uh. It's gonna be a big, fun summer of touring. So I want you to be a part of it, busties, and I will see you there and we'll be back after this. All right, we're back. So before the show began, Brian and I were chit chatting about what did you say, shadow people?
Oh yeah, I well shadow people. We got into the ghosts for a second there. Yeah, And then I said while we were talking. You were talking about your mind surgery. Yeah, my mom had to get eye led surgery so she could see better.
Yes, so she she got like a blethoroplasty, which is what I've probably determined she got, which is like where they take skin out of your eyelids because they get so droopy. But this his mom could not see because her eyelids were being pressed down by all the skin and gravity and age, and that is wild. So she had to do it just so she could see better.
Yeah, and I can't. I didn't even notice. I couldn't even tell.
Brian didn't notice.
And she looks fair.
To be fair, you don't look people in their eyes.
Yeah, not really.
I mean it's I kind of don't either. So I look at people's mouths a lot, and their shoulder and stuffy.
I look away. When I am in a deep conversation with someone, I look away.
Yeah, I guess I noticed that about you. But I think I might as well, or or I probably do. If you look away, I probably take it as a side I shouldn't be just staring at this person's eyes, so like I naturally look away, but it wouldn't be I don't. Yeah, but that's that's probably why you didn't know.
Times I'm making eye contact with somebody while I'm talking to them, and I feel like I'm being rude, Like does this person want me to be drilling into their face?
Right?
Well, they can always look away, and then then you can know.
That you can't because then you lose the battle.
Well, then yes, that person should feel threats that you say me searing as this person isn't this rude? And oh, Brian just look away? Well, then I would lose the battle. Yeah, you're engaging in battle with someone who doesn't know they're in battle. That is rude.
I'd like it, that's what you think. Me. Do you have any whole wheat bread? And then they look away because they work at Trader Joe's. Yeah, you're a cook.
Yeah, I hate eye contact. Could be so it's too much, dude, I don't. I can't.
I really can't do it for very long. I really like no.
I think I'm the same way, and I feel seen and I start to feel like I'm falling in love and I don't want to do that with my optometrist. But that's when you gotta you look like in their eye, their eye is looking in your eye, like two inches from your eye. I mean you can't see it, so it doesn't feel as intense, but there's a vibe.
Sometimes I wish I would live in Japan because in Japan you're not supposed to look people in the eye. It's different. You have to show defference.
Oh that's interesting. I don't think I knew that about.
I don't even think I know that there's just a baby making, but I do remember, I do. I think it's a thing.
Okay, Well, well we were talking about his mom probably not being able to see I'm like, oh my god, now she's can see a whole new world. And I was like, what's something on your periphery that like you go through life, if you didn't have peripheral vision, you just like wouldn't know it's there. And uh, Brian said, ghosts. Yeah, and I love that ghost just hang like right.
Here, but they do.
They're called if you're fast enough, you can catch them.
There's something type of ghosts called shadow people, and they.
Go, they're it. That's there. There's a peripheral ghost and it's called shadow people.
Yeah, that you can only see them in your periphery and they're not really go there like interdimensional beings, and a lot of people claim that they see them in their periphery and we don't really know where they came from or what they are, but they can only be seen in that way.
I feel bad for people who truly believe these things are going on, because if they are true, they it's so annoying that no one believes you. And also, you know, it sounds crazy, but you feel it's so real that you can't, Like, what would you do if some you believed something insane and no one else believed it, you know,
like it would suck. But that I was listening to the beginning of a podcast about alien abductions and how they started in nineteen forty something, maybe into the sixties around there, within those two decades, and then they kind of stopped in like right with the advent of the smartphone. So like reports of alien abduction just like went away
when people started being able to like film stuff. And I don't know the connection there, but that's what the hosts kind of surmise from the timeline is maybe smartphones made it go away, but it was something that people didn't claim to have happened to them until other they heard stories of other people doing it. So there's a big, samous story about an alien reduction and then all of
a sudden everyone's like, I was abducted. But also maybe they didn't know what happened to them until they heard someone else did, and then that made them come forward. Who knows.
There was also a lot there's also trending different types of aliens abducting people, Like in the seventies there were a lot of aliens who were obsessed with preventing the world from being destroyed in nuclear apocalypse, which, okay, all like that makes it.
The seventies were about yeah it's.
Cold War, yeah yeah, And a lot of the aliens in the seventies were these Nordic, beautiful white men and women who had come down. Instead of looking like the typical gray extraterrestrials, they were like humanoid. They were called Nordics, and that was a lot of the seventies. And they come down and they fuck you, and you'd fuck them and everything with great and they'd say, by the way, we got to stop Gorbachev.
In the middle of an alien gang bang. Yes, wait aes I get so they would fuck you, So what happened to the Where are the ones that look the head have heads like guitar picks.
Yeah, those are good.
Those come in.
Those are grays. Those were the ogs. I have a theory about the gray aliens, and that is when I think people who say they were abducted by gray will begin.
Can you just give your let besties know that you are very knowledgeable about the subject and why?
Oh yeah, well, I had a podcast called The Unbelievable Podcast from uh twenty eleven to twenty eighteen that was all about the years. Yeah.
Tim Dillon was a co host the Psyche.
For one year. He was the co host. Yeah, I know, it was a long time. It was pretty popular, but ultimately, ultimately it was we stopped because it was a lot of work for me. It was a lot of research, a lot of clip getting, and I was just like, I can't spend twenty hours a week doing research for this podcast. Even though I loved the podcast and I loved all the unbelievers were the names of our listeners cool and uh yes, miss I missed the podcast boom.
I stopped it in twenty eighteen, and then I wonder what would have happened if I kept going through COVID.
Hmmm.
At the same time, I'm glad I stopped when I did, because I stopped pretty much when conspiracy theories started getting not fun anymore. Oh, like they were just all racist. It was just like there was there was nothing. It was no longer like is Bigfoot reel? It was more like, are the Jews behind your right?
That did take off? Let's get back to the Nordic aliens fucking us away from pedophiles in pizza joints.
So my theory about gray aliens is I believe that that is a psychological phenomenon of people re experiencing their trauma, perhaps in a lucid sleep state or just having a PTSD style traumatic re experiencing a trauma, and a lot of the trauma comes from childhood, when you're a baby. Perhaps I believe a lot of people who claim that they were abducted by gray aliens are re experiencing a molestation from when they were when they were maybe even
a baby or a kid. And the reason why the ale and that's why a lot of aliens will do anal probing. They'll take you up into their ship. You'll be they're touching you and The reason why gray aliens look like they do is because when you're a baby and your perception, yeah, it's just a gray, fuzzy thing, big black eyes. This is just what a baby perceives a person.
Oh my god, Brian, this is probably pretty pretty good.
SERI I like that. Yeah. So I believe all the people that are certain that they have been abducted by gray aliens, a lot of them are probably just reliving their molestation trauma from childhood. I'm not saying it's all of them. There's also a lot of them who just want to make money or just want attention. But the reason I think that's why the great I think it's
a real phenomenon. I think that the people who are thinking that they were abducted by gray aliens actually do see that and believe it and believe it's happening.
Yeah.
Yeah, But it's just like some of the psychosomatic pains. It's like your brain.
Doesn't mean it didn't happen to you because you're experiencing it like it did. So I'm not taking that away from you that it was terrifying and that you literally think you were abducted by aliens and you feel but it might not be that, but that doesn't take anything from your experience. Yeah, I mean people don't like to feel like they're crazy. People think they're crazy because but it's crazy. Is like, it's not your fault. Your brain's
just doing something weird to help you cope. Potentially, if you're theory so weird, it's protective I think, mm hmmm, yeah, to oh, to make it feel like it's so you don't have to think of it's your dad.
Or your uncle or what may, or maybe to help you make sense of it for closure.
Or it truly is like a disorder, Like if you're just hearing voices in your head and you say that it's Satan talking to you, like you need to get like medicated for that.
That's why I asked you if you knew about gang stalking.
And oh, yeah, what's that?
Really creeped me out. I found it through Reddit and someone, you know, someone just had commented in another reddit like sounds like gang stocking, and I like, went to the subreddit and it's for people who feel it's it's there's a let me just read it. Gang Stocking or group stalking is a set of persecutor persecutor persecutory beliefs sorry, in which those affected believe they are being followed, stalked,
and harassed by a large number of people. The term is associated with targeted individual ti uh oh boy, do you know what that is? Oh, you can stalk whatever you like. Okay, So online communities, yeah. A twenty sixteen year Times article estimated that more than ten thousand people were participating in nonline communities organized around the conviction that it's members are victims of a sprawling conspiracy to harass thousands of every day of Americans with mind control weapons
and armies of so called gang stokers. So if you go to the gang stoker or subreddit, it's just people's being like, people are following me and this is what happened to me today. And the guy in the striped shirt was like, it's just people feeling like they're being Truman showed a little bit, but also harassed and like really fucked with.
And is that different from paranoid schizophrenia?
That's what people think it is, is like people suffering with that, or people suffering from drug like symptoms like meth symptoms or sleeplessness or just you know, yeah, it's just but they all agree, and they it's kind of cute that they all have this community where they do believe that their whole life is being monitored and they're being stalked, and it's like, it's nice that they have a way to connect. It's like Orange theory, m h.
It's like a community. It builds community that you're chasing or you're being chased. I mean, I guess you're chasing goals and orange theory, but yeah, it's just like it's I sometimes like whenever gang stalking comes up on Reddit, because people make fun of it, you know, in the comments, I always go and check out what they're talking about, and then sometimes I get a little scared because they sometimes like it would be terrifying to live this way.
So I actually I have empathy for them. I'm not like just making fun of them. I feel like, really sad that that would be horrible to think that you were your life was trim and show.
Yeah, and but I've had.
People that friends with bipolar believe some wild stuff, and I guess I've believed some wild stuff in my mental illness journey along the way. Then I'm just like, what were you thinking? But I always felt like I had a control over it. You know. I never felt out of control of my mind or body too much except when I drank maybe, And that's why I quit doing that, because that's when you That's truly an saying that we get blackout drunk and we just send our blackout selves.
It's like sending. It's a show where they send a toddler out to get groceries. The Japanese show that's what you do when you get It's called like I Forget. It was a hit on Netflix for a bit, but they send like a three year old and they monitor it closely, but it just like goes out to get to do a task into the city and they just follow it. That's what you do when you get blackout drunk. You just are like, all right, let's just see what happens. I loved it. I loved it so much. Why did
I like it? See that's fucked up that I liked it? M Yeah, like, how do you even? I mean you like, remember, oh, I would just say to my friends, let's get blackout, Like I liked blacking out so much?
So you liked Did you like the Journey to Blackout or did you knowing that you are blacked out.
I guess I liked the journey to blacking out because it would always just involve like dancing and being loud and like confident and like just happy literally just happy, you know, like excited about life, no worries. And then the black out part, I guess was just I liked that because it was risky. I guess they're risky.
It was risky.
It was there's a little part of it when I'm going back and remembering, like, Okay, we're gonna get blackout tonight. It was a little bit like shoplifting, like I'll get away with it. I'll probably survive and get through, but it's not gonna it's gonna feel it's risky, like will you what's gonna happen tonight? What are you ben? Where are you gonna end up? When?
What?
When your eyes open tomorrow? Where will you be? You don't know you're sending yourself out blindly?
Did you have any friend who would bring you home? I mean, how did you get a blackout?
I would say, let's get blackout, meaning everyone blackout tonight. You never drank like that, nah, I did.
But I always knew who was going to drive me home.
Good for you, even though from New York City. Though it was like, we'll just take a cab or something, you know what I mean.
Yes, yes, I have been in a cab. But like you know, I guess when you're at the end of the night, when you're blackout and you you're in a cab with a stranger, something like works extra in your brain, Like you can't fall asleep, you have to make sure you get home.
Yeah, something, but it feels like at some point you're so drunk there's nothing that any nothing, there's no saving you, like it's it. I loved John Mulaney's joke about how he would black out. I really related to it, and I loved that he wrote it because I felt so alone with this. But I would black out after like three beers because my body just but I knew what was happening because I had heard them malany joke before this started happening to me. You know, this is after
drinking for years. But I would take like a couple of beers and then but he said, his doctor said, He's like, why do I black out after a couple of drinks? And his uh, doctor said, because your body like knows where this is going it like never doesn't go that way. So it's just it's like they're shutting down early. And I was like, oh my god, like lights out, Like let's just shut it, like we know we're closing, no more customers are coming in, let's just
shut it down. And so I really related to that, and that's kind of helped me know I had a problem. Comedy can heal you.
I used to do that at the deli that I worked at. I worked at a deli when I was for a long time, and sometimes it would be like the deli's closing at nine, and I would lock the door at like seven thirty and turn off the lights, and then people would come up and it would be so mad because they're like that focus.
It's not even people don't know that small businesses like they can set their own hours. There's no law that makes it so they have to be open. But when you are a customer, you just feel like you.
Said you would be Yeah, well, to be fair, the owner of the delhi wanted it to be open.
But I mean, let's just say you're a man who owns the deli and you wanted to disclose early that night.
Yeah, yeah, it happens in small towns, like you're you're all on the Delhi, but you're also the fire Marshal and it's like, well, I gotta close down the deli to go.
But it is is so enraging when you are a person who is, oh my god, going to a restaurant or something, or like you just feel so entitled, Like but Google said, and it's like what entitles you to this business right now? It's like it's uh, yeah, so gangs talking. Yeah, that is an interesting subreddit and really opened my eyes to a world I didn't know and so did. I'm just opening my eyes to so many new subcultures. Orange Theory. I mean, I feel bad that I like I felt like I would bad mouth THEMB
in some way or made fun of them yesterday. I want to be clear, like I even went. I told my plates instructor about going to Orange Theory and she was like, oh, I thought you were gonna love it. She was like, I love it. So it's something that pilates instructors do love ones that are so I'm not making fun. It's not a bad workout. It actually is good. Just wasn't for me because I just I don't need that. I don't. It's too loud. The music's too loud, and the guy talking is too loud. And I'm a little
sensitive sound bitch. Lately, if I wore I if I went back, I would wear earplugs.
Yeah, but you know what's been loud lately that I really am mad at is the airplane speakers. Like when they why is that so loud and piercing?
Thank you good things? It's one out of ten is truly causing damage to people's ear drums if they are within five feet of that thing, like the people seated closest to the speakers are in Hell, it's not okay. And you are such an asshole for talking way more than you need to. I've been saying it for years, but no one, no one needs to know the speed of the wind.
In the city you're landing in. No one's ever felt been interested in that unless it's like sixty mile an hour winds. We don't give a shit that the or what direction the wind.
Is coming from. Yeah, why do we have that information? Why why don't you tell us where we can pick up an uber when we get it, because there are no signs that I feel so bad for anyone who's like sending their parents to a new city to figure out where the ride share is to get their uber X. I am an experienced uber finder, and airports leave you high and dry. There's no one around. There's no one to ask for help. If there's anyone working in a baggage claim, it's these two ladies that are trying to
get you to go Mormon. There's no there's no help desk, there isn't or you have to talk to anyone. You have to go into one of the offices, and there are already people lined up because they're back. There's just no one around, and it is so hard to find. If you are in charge of the layout of an airport, did you all get together and decide that we are going to make so few signs about it. We don't want them to find it. What is in it for you to not have people find you?
Well?
La exit? Can you imagine an lax It just says la exit, which isn't a word.
If you imagine that they tried to brand it and make a special exit that is that makes no sense.
Can you imagine you're from a foreign country and you land in lax and you're trying to find an uber or a way to get around La Exit. It's not even something that you can look up what it means.
Confusing. I'm not kidding you, like I get. I just get sad when I struggle to find these ride chairs. I always just think about my mom landing in the city by herself for like a girl's trip or something, and how it would add like an hour to her already struggling day where she's carrying a bag. Like make it easy for old people, you assholes. Make more signs, be more explicit. So yeah, why doesn't the pilot talk about where that?
That's so funny? He gives you use He's just like, the winds are going to be sixty miles per hour. The city was founded in eighteen seventy.
And guess what, none of it is ever The river.
Is flowing three miles an hour.
But I'm not kidding you. Have you ever not heard the wind speed of the city you're about to learn?
No, they always the speed and I go up, Why looks like my catamaran's not gonna happen.
Have you ever like even thought about like when they say that, does it make your mind do anything? Mine? It just goes, it flushes right away. It's like when you flush and you poop and you flush, and so it never even sins in the bowl. It just goes right down out a flush.
Yeah. Yes, Oh, you don't even have to flush. Sometime it just.
Goes as you're flushing, you you flush, That's what that information does through. It never even touches the bowl. For me, it's worthless. I'm sick of it. And it's too loud. You're too loud, And I know I got loud on this rant too, but I did try to move them like away from my face while I was screaming, which pilots man, some of you like to be heard, and some of you flight attendants like to be heard. And
sometimes I'm in the mood for it. Sometimes I like a little joke, but most of the time I'm not. But I just turn up my airplane noise. It's none of my business. I like that they're trying to be cheery, but if they're a little bit cunty with that cheeriness, I don't care for that. That is really like annoying to me. If you're trying to be funny but you're just being mean.
Cheeriness they're trying to force their cheeriness on you, and it's like I'm in the middle of a flight, right.
It's not cheery though, it's it's being. It's saying mean things and being like and you know, we what's an example. I kind of like the one where they're like, we don't want to we will take your we will find your air pods and they will be on eBay by the end of the day. Like I don't mind that. It's like a teacher that's like a it's just when they get kind of when you can sense their yes, when they We've all had teachers like this. What teachers that would be funny about stuff the they need to
tell us and teachers that would be funny. But it's cruel and they hate you, and there's a simmering hatred for you. I can just you're not masking it as well as you think you are. Women and men who gets the funny it? It feels feminine to me, whatever it is, it is a feminine thing of like being because guess what I got it in me too. I love being mean with jokes, but it's not the funniest you can be, and it's not pleasant, but I do love being vindictive with jokes, so I get it too.
I'm a flight attendant in my soul. All right, well we have to take a break and we'll be right back. And we're back. Do you have a ramp brand? Yeah, let's go.
Enough with the credit card offers for thirty minutes at the end of the flights. Can we stop? And I'm not really even mad at the people at the at the person making the announcement. I know they have to do it for work. I'm not mad at the corporations for trying to offer you credit cards. I'm mad at the fucking people who take the pamphlets.
There's people people don't they don't take this.
I see people.
They must because they've been doing it for years, and they wouldn't do something for years if it didn't work. People must be taking these pamphlets. Well, these people just want these miles.
Well, can you get a credit card somewhere some other time. Sometimes I'm even a little bit like.
Maybe you're so right, Hey, you guys, let's all agree to not take those pamphlets anymore, to send a message that will do it on our own time, and they'll stop if they're not getting from that, but actually they might still take it as a sale because they might track that that person who got that credit card the next day was on a flight before and heard the pitch.
It's just free advertising, you'r a it is.
They make the battle for your.
Attention, and any time that they can get your attention that they will in certain ad.
You're I'm not even kidding, Like I'm kind of surprised we're not getting Like there's not an airline that just plays ads the whole time and it's like ten minute spirits that you it's coming.
Yeah, I just keep a great idea because.
People would take a fifty dollars flight and watch ads the whole time.
Wait a minute, I mean you do get ads when you're watching the videos, even on the apps.
You're knocked out of watching the videos in this flight, you have to your eyes are kept open.
Yeah, it's like the opposite of a conversation.
And you're marketed things for people like you who are willing to pick up. No, poor people that have to do that, have to do this to it's mine. It will be mind control that will be gang sucking. I mean, I can't imagine people like I signed up for Disney Plus so I could watch Ara's tour and I I
sign up for I Have. I'm lucky enough to be able to afford premium versions of things where I don't have to watch ads on these streaming and when I see an ad, I get like if Anya pull something on her phone and I watched the ad before we watch a YouTube video together, I just go like, give to send it to me, like I can't, I won't do this, but it is it's so disrespectful that they're like, if you can afford it, you don't have to watch this slop, But if you can't, we're gonna sell you
a bunch of more shits so you'll be even more poor. So then you can't. Then you'll have to get the version that has six ads instead of three, because you're gonna buy so much shit you're gonna be even poor. It's like, why that's cruel to make people pay so that they don't have to suffer. Like I don't know what the solution is though.
Am I crazy? But back in the day when cable first came out, wasn't it commercial free?
I think that was maybe like the draw of I can't my dad would know because he started in the cable industry when the cable industry started in nineteen eighty three. I think my dad started and worked until two thousand and thirteen in the cable industry, so he would know. But I think HBO certainly is and was. HBO only has ads for HBO shows, which I like.
Then there's like trailers that's fun.
Yeah, it's it's fun. But no one watches HBO live anymore. And do you want to know how I know? Because my special Good Clean Filth was on HBO HBO the other night on TV. I got not one DM about I didn't get any more new follows. I mean I didn't check follows because I don't really know what that is like or how to check that really unless you're paying close to the number. But I didn't get any like dms about it. I didn't get any like mentions of people putting on their story like usually if my
specials airing, people people don't care, people aren't watching. The only time you would watch HBO as it's like just airing is if you're my parents and you have big Clean Filth already programmed into your system so that it will alert you when it's on or you were at a hotel and you just got in and you haven't had time to put your streaming stuff in and you just want to eat your Thai food because you landed late and it's cold, and you just go, Okay, I'll
just see what's on, and you've put on Fox because they always have some fun game shows. You watch Beat Bobby Flay. He's on constantly, and that's a really good show to watch. But can I say that, Uh, my favorite show is if I'm just turning on the TV, it's I'm gonna go to Fox and if I'll watch late night. But usually when I land it's like a usually or like get back to on like a Friday night from a show late night shows haven't started yet.
I want to go to bed, and it's I will watch I will check out what Fox is showing, because there's usually like a song about like or like a show about guessing celebrities singing or something Beat Bobby Flay. And then what's the other like a movie that might be that I haven't seen yet, which guess what I have not seen?
And this is criminal okra or no, it's on a movie.
What I have seen that well, no, I have not seen that. This is a movie that Okay, this is this is one of the classic comedies of of my era, of my generation. No, of my generation. I'm not sixty clueless, great guest, Noah, you are on the right track. It is l it's when I had already been doing comedy. We're talking to two thousands. No, I have not seen Miss Congeniality, but that's not the right answer. And I have also not seen Sweet Home Alabama or Legally Blonde,
which I know is going to blow people's minds. But I don't really care about hot women being like I know they're funny. It just didn't appeal to me, and I don't know why it still doesn't. I'm sorry, but this one is like Bad.
Men can't believe super Bad.
No, super Bad's amazing. I went on super Bad amazing, But in that it's it's right with Anchorman in terms of importance to people.
Wow.
And it's not old school, but it's right there too.
Trip.
No, No, I don't know if I've seen year old Virgin, guest. Virgin is a good guess. I did see that. I loved it.
Where's My Car?
Loved that movie.
American Pie.
No, amazing. But we're talking later and we're talking. Okay, let's uh Harold and Kumar. No, I did see Harold and Kumbar. Wasn't a huge fan, but definitely a classic. You need to see. Road Trip also a classic early comedy. This is Going to Park. Okay, Will Ferrell has a cameo. That's one of the greatest things ever. Oh old dodgeball, not old school, not dodgeball.
Will Ferrell cameo. Yeah, it's the greatest thing.
I didn't know about. I didn't know about it. I mean I've talked about. I literally saw a clip of this and I go, I've never seen this Will Ferrell scene. He's sitting on a couch and he's like eating cereal in a robe. It was what I'm remembering, But maybe that's not it. And and Vince Vaughan is no Owen Wilson Wedding Crashers and I think it would probably be one of my favorite movies. But there's a scene with
Will Ferrell in it that's I have to say. It's one of the funniest things I've ever seen in my life.
Mm hmm.
Do you know what I'm talking about? That scene? Have you seen wedding.
Cashers definitely, but I guess I don't remember the scene for something.
Really, he's like calling to his mama. He lives with his mom, and he's talking about uh he he's he's like the original guy that goes to weddings and.
Credit Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah.
He's kind of like Jerry O'Connell's role in Can't Hardly Wait, where he's like the old guy that comes back and he's like, yeah, I used to do this. I used to be the coolest guy in camp. Remember that scene? Yeah, it was so good. Can Harley Wait's the best fucking movie.
You know what I watched on a plane?
Hmm?
The Holdovers?
Oh yeah, I see it. Yes, yeah, let's talk.
About what'd you think of The Old Overs?
What is that? I haven't heard about it? It's a Paul Giamatti plays a teacher at a private boys school that's kind of like a what is it called when you send your kids away and you get a boarding school? Boarding school?
Thank you?
A curmudge teacher from a boarding school who's with a lazy with a lazy eye, who is stuck taking care of several kids who are not able to go home for the holidays with their family.
And he's just a stinky curmudgeon professor who smells because he has an actual body condition that makes him stinky. So he's just like unattractive and like he has a weird eye going one way, and he's just not and he's bitter about life and he's bitter about his place in life. And he could have been more in all these things he wants to He could have been an author, and he's.
What about the character you're just describing Paul Giamatti, that's funny.
So he did have to wear a weird eye, and I'm like, he could have just been him. It doesn't you know, like his eyes are already doing something.
Fun, but something fun that great, that's like a that's like a a mom or something to that fit their care. Your eyes are just doing something fun.
Honestly, it is fun because it makes him who he is to watch, Like, yeah, and I'd been horny for Paul Giamati, especially in that Amy Schumer sketch where they like make out. I've been like, oh my god, he's hot. So I don't feel bad saying that about him because
I actually am attracted to him. So but anyway, in this movie, he plays this professor and then he gets he has to stay with the kids who don't get to go home for the holidays because their parents suck or alcoholics, or have abandoned them or are just like, you know, mom's got a new husband, so she's going away to the Bahamas. And so these all these kids get stuck at this boarding school, boarding school over Christmas break, they have no school and the heat shut down and
and Paul Gamanni has to watch them and hilarity ensues. No, it's not hilarious, it's cute. He's amazing. Paul Gmonny is great, the boys great, even though he's way too old for the role. But it's still it worked. There's one scene later on that was maybe a pickup that they did after he had you know, file grower aarp. No, he was really Yeah, it was looked a lot in the parking lot at the end, I guess it was just
the end. Yeah, and he looked a lot older because all of a sudden, this the lighting, you could see like fine lines on his face, yeah, not wrinkles, but like, oh he's he's older than that.
And he was like driving a rental car.
What oh, yeah, you can't do that five brow Okay, So then so it was good. Yeah, but best Picture nominee, no.
Way, I mean I really thought it. I didn't. Yeah, I don't know what a best picture should be these days, but.
I don't either, so maybe that's I thought.
It reminded me of good Will hunting, and I love goodwill hunting, and that's why I was like, oh, good Will hunting. Just twenty years later.
It didn't seem as like raw as good Will Hunting.
It seemed quite a bit more.
There's like a more machine.
To it, but it was like a New England school mentormentee.
Dead Poets Society was my favorite. That's that's only if we're going, we're going. Dead Post Society is the most fucked up, then good Will Hunting, then Holdovers. Holdovers is those two.
Yeah. I didn't like that Dead Poet Society as much as Goodwill h I loved.
It so much. I haven't watched it in years, but I remember seeing it in high school and declaring it it is my favorite film. I like loved it. I was like obsessed with it in high school and it was really old by that time anyway, but I just loved that the ending was not happy.
And then then the guy from House. All right, he was the the guy from House, not the main not Hugh Laurie. But I don't know anyone from House.
But I do know all the other people in that movie. Ethan Hawk was in it.
The main character, the main boy is Society was in House.
Oh, I didn't know that. I actually haven't seen him as an adult. I know that one of the boys was so cute, and he ended up being the guy that was on news news radio, newswork, newswork, no often the the Aaron Sorkin thing about a newsroom, newsroom, uh, newsroom, and then he's on something else too, maybe the Good Wife. I don't know, he's he's great though. He's in a Shumer sketch as well, one of my FA favorite ones where they are Josh Charles. Oh my god, I the
biggest crush on Jos Charles, me too. Why is he so hot? Because it's kind of unassuming. I loved it. I don't know that, you know, what kind of the vibe of another guy that didn't get a lot of like girls being swoony over who they should have been swoony over Steve's.
On MMMM don't mess with his on.
Do you know who I'm talking about, Brian, No, one's gonna find out in a second.
Steve's on the Age.
Oh yeah, okay, so that Thing You Do he was like the goofy drummers. I guess No, No, he was the basist mate. I don't know what he was.
And what else is he? Bear?
Kay?
Joy ride diary? Will you go back for Silverman? No? The Planet of the Apes?
No?
What do I?
Yeah, that Thing You Do go before that? And what was he in before that?
Uh? Strange wilderness.
No, you've got You've got mail, That's what it is. Yes, he was the guy in the book shop that worked with Meg Ryan, who was like so adorable. Oh god, there were some nineties guys that played that kind of character. The other one was Jerry Maguire than the manny, he was the nanny that was the man I was very attracted to him as well in the nineties.
Yeah.
Oh, but That Thing You Do is one of the best movies of all time. Like, I don't know if it's best picture worthy, but it's it is the most watchable fucking thing. Tom Hanks kills it. Tom Scott Everett kills its.
Songs from Yeah.
And they don't even just have that song. They have bet. They even have so many songs in that movie that are so bad.
Song is so good, it sounds like it's from the Beatles. It good like a movie.
Oh my God, Live Tyler is so beautiful and so perfect in it. But Tom Hanks is just great as their manager. It's just a great movie. And I love this. I just love it, like I love any movie that deals with like show business. I always whenever I would pitch ideas to people to develop I'm like, okay, so it's like set on a TV set, and they're like, people don't Americans don't really have an interest in this, like the regular Americans.
And I'm like the show it.
I know. There's always like exceptions, but by and large, Rock I know. But thirty Rock wasn't a huge hit.
I got six seven seasons.
I'm just saying it. I think Tina Fey would say it wasn't. It is one of the best TV shows to ever exist, without question, but it was not a It was a critical hit, but I don't think it didn't great numbers. But I've just heard the feedback I've gotten from the world and This was like maybe three or four years ago when I was thinking about making a show. An average person doesn't really interested in the
inner workings of Hollywood. They're just like Kiah. They don't really care, and there are exceptions to it, but like, by and large, that is not They just want to see like things that represent mostly normal life. But it's hard because I don't really relate to those like whenever they're like Nikki, let's do your character. But if she was a photographer, and I'm just like, I don't know, I would kill myself if I had to do that, no offense to photographers, like I would never have done that,
and so I can't think like that. But then you go, okay, well then it's not me. So I can't be a photographer like Nicki Glazer can't be a photographer or whatever. I just picked photographer. I think Whitney was that in her show Whitney, and actually that actually worked and it
would work. I just I yeah, I just found it interesting that people are like, no, we don't really care about like Studio sixty on the Sunset Strip, people weren't that thrilled about that show, and I fucking loved it because I'm interested in that world, and I'm not saying that this is all people. I think there are gonna be a lot of besties who are like, no, I love that world because you guys are savvy and cool.
People are interested in the police, the fire, and the hospital, so those are the jobs they want.
To see first respond to science fiction? Can I just say, like, I don't. Science fiction to me is as off limits of an interest as heavy metal music. To me, I don't understand it. I can't relate to people who like it. It's just I know, it's just but there are some things that you guys would never ever like, no matter how much time you spent with it, you couldn't. And that's not true. I think, Yeah, there's just certain things that some people are totally into and you just go
it's just not for me. And I don't science fiction. I don't really like other worlds that are just invented out of nothing. And my mom the other day said the same thing. She was like, I just don't care.
About it, like fantasy stuff. I can't get into it either, But.
The people that are into it are so into it that it makes me want to get into it because it seems it's like sports fans or being swifty. Might I say, like, I went in because I want to. I love being a swifty. It's one of my favorite things because I care so much about something and know so many details about this thing that's like wouldn't exist if it weren't for her mind. So it's the same thing for our R Tolken or what JJ are?
Art?
Am I confusing people? Jay are Tolkien?
J R R Tolkien?
Is that right? I thought it's Tolkien Tolkien? Yeah, yeah, yeah, k E I N. I didn't know, guys, get it to or what's his name? The George R R.
Martin?
Wait, why there's so many R R s science fiction?
I mean it's uh yeah, R R Ronald.
Reagan J J Abrams.
They insulted. They inserted the r rs after the eighties to support Ronald Reagan, and they never took.
J J R R Abrams J J R R.
Yeah.
Yeh, isn't it J J Abrams or is it j Abrams?
It's J J Abrams. Yeah, you gotta have the double letters J J. Hey, what's up J J?
Yeah?
I think so.
I don't know if I just call him?
Wait, I have I have a I have had an idea. I wouldnt want to forget to say, because it's about the planes. Way back when we're talking about planes, no go back, capitalist plan Spirit Airlines. If you want to hit me up, I can be your marketing manager. They should at the end of the flight, when you're walking off the flight, they should hand you a book of coupons for things that are in the city that you landed in.
Wow.
And they can make money from the businesses who are like, I want to be in the coupon book and it's just like another way to waste.
Would people not be doing that? That is like just money to be made.
Yeah, And then then you get the coupons and then you're like, oh look five dollars off or free donut.
You're targeting people who are visiting your city in want to explore and already are like they're on vacation, so when they're of the mindset of like spending money but saving money. Yeah, this is a brilliant plan.
I could just see that book scattered all over airports where people just like dropping in.
Yes, but just like everything else, and they don't have to take one if they don't want one. It's kind of like the credit card thing.
Yeah, do you want a coupon book, you can get a free.
I like this idea.
I know, Highway Start. We're going to start a business.
We can start an app, Brian. It'd be a coupon app, and it's an app that for for people who travel. When they land they yeah.
Okay, we can start. But that's an easy business plan. We need seed money, we need now, Okay.
So the app is that you it's for people who traveled, who want to, who are tourists in towns, and then if you if it's senses that you are in that location, it unlocks coupons for you that you won't know about till you land in that city.
That's right, That's right, Okay, I.
Just added that thing to it. So it incentivizes traveling there, and it incentivizes like I'm special, so I'm unlocking something.
And things like that. You land in Chicago and then boom, free boat tour for the architectural boat tour for you.
And can I pitch a thing that I want to do. I want to start a swifty account on my Instagram that's just for swifties and you pay five bucks to subscribe. You know how you can do like close friends. It's a subscription service, so that's where I put all my swifty content so I don't have to get made fun of by people who aren't swifties.
Yeah, well you can have their subscribe on Instagram now.
Yeah, so I think I'm going to do that, but I feel bad making money off of her, Like I think I'm just gonna add it up and donate it because I just don't want I don't want anyone to think of doing this to like get rich, Like I just want to be I want to talk freely about Taylor Swift. Yeah, without anyone, without Tim Dillon seeing it.
It should be a feature of Instagram because like, I have the same problem with my apples, Dillon. I do cartoons. I do cartoons on my page, but I was like, I can't post Apple content on my cartoon page because the people follow me for cartoons don't want to see
a bunch of Apple shit. They should have a way not to have separate profiles, but just the way to divide your profile up into categories so that if people want to follow that section and it's the same amount of followers all gathering up in the same place, but it's divided.
How would you do that?
Though? I don't know. Instagram's got to figure this out because TikTok's going away. We need them to enhance their You use your experience.
All right, Well they're on it, they're listening and they're tuned in this weekend, Gary, Indiana, Cincinnati, Ohio. See you there, besties, chechnique Glazer dot com for all my tour dates, which there are tons coming up, and also get your calendars ready. April eleventh, April eleventh. I don't know what day of the week that is. Let's look it up real quick. April eleventh of the portant day because F Girl Island, which has been renamed it's a Thursday on the CW.
Set it now, guys.
F Boy Island didn't do too well on the CW. Let's be honest with ourselves. We need the views. This is not something that's just like, oh, I can skip that. Nicky's my friend, but I'm just she's fine. I need you to watch F Girl Island, which has been renamed to Lovers and Liars because it's a it's peak. F Boy Island didn't do great, so we don't need We're leaving it behind for this, but we are an F
Boy Island spin off. It is the same gameplay, but instead there are three guys looking for love, and it's a bunch of women who are either f girls who are just there for the money or nice girls who actually want a relationship. And it's fucking wise the.
Lovers or they're liars.
Lovers and Liars, c W April eleventh, Guys, I'm not kidding if you liked F Boy Island, or if you didn't even watch to F Boy Island, I'm not kidding you. It's so much better because the more girls for a reality show been more insane that the record set to record. Now Lovers and Liars, April eleventh, c W. We'll see you then see next week on the podcast by guys WK. Bye,