The nick A Gliser Podcast.
Glaser, here's Nikki.
Hello here, I am welcome to the show. It's Nicky Gleizer Podcast. I'm in a pretty good mood today. I just went to Pilate's early morning, got it done with. I don't think there's any better feeling than being done with a workout. Oh yeah, Oh it's the best. Can you beat it?
Can anyone beat that feeling? The worst time to die would be right after you leave the gym.
Interesting, okay, yeah, because you just worked out, you put in the time, and you're about to have like a really good hour, and you don't.
You don't get to experience the benefits.
I always think that it's like, well, you can look hot during your autopsy. But I always think about the worst time to die would be at the end. You like, you take a plane somewhere and you you take like a seventeen hour flight and it it it crashes upon landing.
Oh yeah, I'd rather just like.
Let's get it over with at the top of it. So you just and you're in a middle seat the whole time on like a China Eastern Air, which was the worst flight I've ever taken in my life. That was the it was hell on Earth jet Blue Mint. I would like to die at the end of that because I'm laying horizontal. I'm sleeping the whole time. That was the greatest experience of my life. Of the year. My best moment of the past three hundred and sixty five days was a flight from Los Angeles to West
Palm Beach two weeks ago Jet Blue Mint Horizon. I lay down the whole time. No one can get me in the air, there's no responsibilities, there's no there could be no wife. I no one knows I am safe in a cubby. There's someone next to me. I don't like even I like someone laying next to me too. I just like to be like some I like that everyone's like awake doing things, and I get to sleep peacefully like a little squirrel, like hollow it out.
Long in your bed at night and then hearing your parents talking and like the other room. That's like from childhood.
It's the greatest. When there's activity, someone is, someone's awake to get intruders monsters if they come. But yeah, okay, so jet Blue it's like you walk in or this is like it's it's just a first class experience so and not a lot of planes have it so you can lay down. Those are always like flights, you know, like longer.
But usually domestic.
What was that?
Especially domestic flights.
Usually it's got to be like Los Angeles to New York. But this Los Angeles to West Palm Beach was like a five hour flight, so I slept the entire time. But yeah, it lays all you get totally.
Flat, and just think about the people flying from LA to West Palm Beach. Those are some pretty special people that are like the West Beach is filled with boomers who are retired, and LA people are all mostly in the industry, so it's probably yeah, like.
I don't want to know how much that flight costs.
They're probably like producers from the Seven Doors storry about.
Yeah, that's my new thing to spend money on. I'm just doing this shit. Flying first class when you can lay down is my favorite thing in the world. There's not there's not a moment I spent with my niece where she was giggling and saying I love you. That is better than that feeling. There's not me completing, you know, months long of preparing for a special and it finally being done. There's no there's no better feeling than sleeping in the air.
Would you rather do that than fly private?
Oh yeah, one hundred percent. I liked. I like being around people. I don't I don't want to fly private because I also feel like you'll die private, Like you have a better chance of dying when it's a smaller plane. Sure, so I get a little bit worried about that. But no, I would and no, I wouldn't want to fly private. I feel like I would feel lonely.
You wouldn't drop twenty k to go private to West I like airports.
I like Hudson Newses. I like paying four dollars and nine cents for a diet coke. I like setting my bags down and going to the bathroom. I just I like, I don't like the TSA, but like it's not so bad once you get in there. Once you pass the TSA, it feels you just feel like no one can get you in there. There's just nothing you can do. I just want to be protected from people getting me.
Where are they get in that?
Like if you wrote to me and were like, I need you to write back to this email or I need you to review this video. To send us notes on it. The WiFi is really bad here, like an airport, there's nowhere to listen to things. There's no where to like actually work.
That's where I do all my listening and working.
Yes, I guess people do.
Definitely have WiFi, and everyone knows.
It's not like these buingo hotspots anymore. It's like it's free strong. You have to watch an ad for AT and T for fifty seconds and then you're in the plane is different.
I think it's so funny in airports, like in the waiting areas when there's like a crowd of people where you can plug in your charger block for the phone. It's just people huddled around.
In like this. It's like a fire in a old you know barrel. Yeah, like homeless people.
The remember that were you there for the blackout of twenty there for the black fourteen something? Oh those were wild to fourteen.
I think there was one only two thousand and eight.
Two thousand and eight, I think it was.
How long was it blacked?
Well, it's pretty wild. I think it was like a week or something. For there were some parts of it that were way longer.
I was there in twenty fourteen. But I don't remember.
I don't remember exactly. It wasn't two thousand and eight, because yeah, I wouldn't have.
Been really was it was before the tens.
The big blackout, Well that was Hurricane Sandy and then there maybe that was. Yeah, the blackout was twelve twenty twelve.
Oh, two thousand and three was the blackout that I read?
Oh, well that was that was me growing up. Blackout That was like the whole Eastern Seaboard blackout and where I went looting as a young boy.
Do you remember that?
Yeah? No, I remember the blackout of two thousand and three and men I went looting, Yes, I.
Did know you did.
It's like your neighbors under I went and I stole.
Me and my friends we went and I went to the summer camp that I used to go to, and we stole like a basketball or something like that. Yeah, because there was nothing. Everything was off and it was dark. You really couldn't see anything. And me and my friends, me and my little rapscallion friends there, we were real little rascals. We went through the town and we stole mostly sporting goods from places that wouldn't have missed them.
Okay, like a plate against sports or like, like, how did you get into these sporting good stores that.
The camp was just wedn go to stores? I did, like throw a brick through a window and loot like it's San Francisco in twenty twenty? Am I right? No? I went a climb defense or unhooked defense or just walked into the open area that the property was.
It was like the worst thing you ever did in your life? Was like, was that the most breaking laws? Like you ever did? Hold on, I have a booger. I can't handle this. There's a face, an old face mask down here.
I'm gonna.
I hate when like there's just like a like a wet booger you like like sniffle your nose and it like transfers into chic. No, is this too gross for you?
Wait?
Does this not happen to you?
I don't like what ones?
Yeah, they're horrible because at least a dry one you can feel and you can like fall off, you can like flick it off. Noah's gone, she blashed, has said.
No, I'm gonna go loot something and it's clean.
Is that the worst thing you ever did? Brian?
The worst thing I ever did? Crime wise? I can't think of something worse than looting.
Stealing from a summer camp.
I mean, I mean I did beat the ship out of that. I did beat the ship out of that eleven year old.
Last year.
Yeah, last year, and he and he died.
But when did you beat the ship out of eleven year old? You were eleven?
I'm guessing no.
I was thirty and I just killed an eleven. I don't know what like this joke?
Wait, when did you beat the ship out of an eleven year old?
I never? But one time I was that was just a joke. I was exaggerating something that I definitely didn't do. One time I did kidnap a bunch of uh women from a from.
I don't like them. All it keeps coming.
It looks podcast. Is this this whole thing?
Even I can't Yeah, it's all I felt like.
I was vamping with my random crime. This is all going in. People are going to listen to this, then we're gonna.
Have does anyone?
Why not? It's the truer.
It's not like I'm like doing I'm molesting someone on camera, you know, like it's it's it's not a crime to have.
Well, you have a dust in your nose. No, it's not a crime. But you have a very special relationship with like germs and things like that, Like you don't care at all, Like you're your your level of germ caring is like beyond the spectrum. It's like so low.
No, it's I'm not disgusting, Like there are things that I disgusting.
You don't care.
Boogers are not germs. Well yeah, boogers are gross, there's no doubt about it.
A wetness. You can take the we Sorry.
I probably wouldn't want to hear someone talking about that if I was listening to a podcast, but my own. Do not discuss me.
Of course, but do you know what I'm talking?
Wipe your nose and it will like get on your hand somewhere and every stream. I slowly moved, Oh there is, there's one.
On my hands, like.
A part of it gets on there. It's fine, everyone calm down. Let's go back to looting.
Chill.
The biggest thing you've ever stolen cop car? Remember, Oh my god, will you tell us again, because I forget I stole a cop car.
It was the Jimmy Buffett parking lot which me and my friend used to go to the parking lot for shows and not actually go into the shows. And we went to the parking lots so we could steal. Yeah, we would everyone. Someone brought one time, like a truckload of sand and poured it out, and they had like umbrellas and stuff in it, and coolers and all the
kinds of stuff. So they would act like they were at the beach and they would go into the show, and then we would go stealing all their ship, like basically all their booze and food and stuff like that, just abandoned their little beach setups. Yeah, they'd all go to the show and leave everything there because you can't bring it with stealing.
They left it.
Yeah, that's what I'm saying.
Ok.
Yeah, and then someone I'm saying saying or what I'm saying, somebody uh left their lights on of this car, and so me and my friends thought we should turn them off, right, So we saw the keys were in it, and then I started the car to see if it would start, and it didn't, So then me and my friends decaided we were going to jump the car. I don't know why we were doing all this stuff drunk. I guess we thought that to be nice, and then I started, well, well, shoot,
we should go through it. And I opened it.
So you saw a car with its lights on you were you were like, we'll.
Turn them off.
Then let's just check the engine to see if the battery is dead. It is, let's jump the car. So we're being nice.
We're still getting nice. And then then I'm like, well, I'm just gonna look around it. Probably there's probably nothing to steal. In the backseat there was all these coconut brawls and like lay skirts or lays and like the grass skirts. And then I opened like some of the you know, the consoles, and there was a badge and all this cop stuff. And then I was like, well, I don't want to be nice anymore, right, because it's the cops. So then we decided we're going to joy
ride the car. And so we just drove the car and parked it somewhere else to mess with them.
Okay, so was it like you took it and.
Steal Yeah, but we did take the badge.
It was like cop car.
Yeah. Do no, I have policed at.
You ever looked up who it is?
Yes?
Wait, what you like?
My friend has told me? My friend that I just was visiting him. We did it together, and he told me a long time ago that he buried the badge.
You took his badge to grow a cop Yeah, he took he watered it and then.
Allegedly like twenty what.
What I thought you were going to say? Fourteen? Why were you? Why are you doing this at twenty hours?
I was at wrong.
I can understand if you were like a teenager and you couldn't buy alcohol and this is what you did, like in your hands, but twenty four like you should have had a job or you should had.
An illustrious life.
God, and he stole a cop car and a badge. Yes, And now you're implicating yourself on a podcast that thousands of people listened to.
It could be just a story that I like to tell because I.
Under the vail of uh you're like Mark Twain?
Now, oh yes, I am actually Samuel Clemens. That's the trick to it.
Wait, what did Mark Twain lie about true things? Or say that he was lying what he said truth?
I think it's all fiction?
Yeah, well yeah, but he's a fiction. This could be fiction, right, Okay, yeah, all right, it is, Yeah, it could be.
This isn't addiction or.
Is it now? I feel like, yeah, I can't even think of I would be so scared to get caught. But I guess that's the drunk part.
So you were just like really drunk doing this. This was like no, I.
Mean I would do stuff like that all the time. Yeah you know what my dad My dad had, Yeah, she's got sticky. What would you do anymore?
Would you do? Now?
Uh?
So you know you stole, allegedly as a joke.
Stuff from like that I needed for like for the house, stuff like that from like stores you.
Felt bad about. Have you ever later on been like I shouldn't have taken that from that person?
No, because I don't take things from people just.
Like stores or cops, cars or the state. Well you turning that like I'm gonna turn off their lights and then their car.
And then that's funny because I have pictured we have pictures of all this stuff with pictures of like us jumping the car and stuff, and I'm like, that's we thought we were doing something good for a long time. Well, like why are we gonna jump? We should be having fun. Instead we're jumping this person's car they're in They're like living a sponge kick and the and the show, we're jumping their car.
Unbeknown to have totally done something like that when I'm drunk.
It's just turning off the lights. It's turning off the lights seems like a reasonable, But then to go as far as to jump the cars, like.
People have been excited to jump a car, it's always I'm excited.
I being a good sam. A few months ago, I was at a Cardinals game. These teens got out and they were like kind of mean looking teens, like kind of dressed. One of them was dressed and like fish nets and like kind of a skanky outfit. And the ones they were looking like they were definitely, yeah, they were mad. The other ones they were looking like they were definitely going to go do something like drug related. So they went far away they left their lights on.
I yelled, hey, you left your lights on, and then they were out of view. And so I was sitting waiting for my with my sister for someone to pick us up, because they went and got the car to pick us up my dad and Colin, my boyfriend, and then they came back or no.
I went in.
I was like, oh, I'm gonna turn their lights off. So I opened the door and started to turn their lights off, and they all of a sudden came out of nowhere and started like this guy ran up like he was gonna punch me, and they were screaming at me like get the phone. I was like, I was turning out your car, was gonna go there, just turning your lights off console, and then I was gonna, you gotta know you can't just I'm not doing it.
It's a violation of people's privacy and people aren't gonna if someone's going into your car stranger, I would be, really, are you turning my lights off for me? They're gonna just think They.
Were like kids, and I am like a forty year old woman.
Robbing our cars with.
Her dad like and cardinals outfits. I said, I was turning your lights off, and they just wanted to fight. The guy kept screaming at me like I'm gonna kill you. And then we passed him on the highway and they rolled down the window and her whole body was out of the window flapping.
So they gave chase.
They gave Chase. My dad was so mad, he was like, why would you do that. I'm like, it's one of those things you do and then you're like, my dad was mad that I was messing with their life. The car opened, They left the car open with the light on. Yeah.
A lot of people do that though, and then they just are about it, go back to their car, like maybe they were just exiting the cars.
Your lights like stay on for like thirty seconds.
No, this was like five minutes. And I was like, I thought they were going to come back, but they didn't, so that I was like, at this point, I should turn their lights off because now they're not coming back.
But they saw they were coming back just as you were doing.
Yeah, And I don't know how. They must have been sneaky because I think they wanted to mess just trying to be a good sam I'm saying it.
I watched this documentary series on Netflix called American Nightmare, and I cannot believe. I don't open my phone and everyone's talking about it all the time. It's so interesting. It's so crazy. This couple gets abducted, or I saw that the girl gets subducted. So these guys show up in wet suits with laser pointers in the middle.
Of the night and like the goggles on them.
You saw the whole thing.
Yeah, isn't it wild?
And Tomridan like, I'm a criminal, but I'm also doing good. Remind you of the Mare Island creeper who would break into a woman's home or he did this one time he broke into a woman's home, like like held her down and was like, now I'm going to rape you, and she was like please don't, please, please, please don't, and he goes.
She said, I was already raped before.
That was a different one.
Yeah, he did it.
He would always almost rape them and then they would go, I was already raped before. I've already this happened to be in my life.
And he's like, okay, I won't like I said, I don't want to rentize you.
Yeah, and then that, yeah, I know, that's exactly what I said to Chris. I go, that's nice to have in my back pocket. That that's like a thing you could maybe say to them where you're like, you're not gonna you I'm already not ruined, but I'm already like traumatized by this, like because you're not gonna get like they want to still your innocence. Yeah, they want. I hate man, I know.
Already.
I was watching this last night. I was like, if you are a woman who gets through a whole lifetime without being sexually assaulted, you have achieved something because it just seems.
Every man is out there trying to do that.
This is like every man every woman is susceptible to it. Yeah, And it feels like that watching these things. But what he would do is one time he attacked this woman and got into her house late at night, and then she begged him, please don't write me, and he like he like waited a second, and he goes, I can't do this, and then he goes, you really need to get a dog that would really help you from this
happening again. And he was like giving her advice and yeah, and the police officer saying probably something that like he convinces himself now he's a good guy. Yeah, like maybe that, Like I don't I hate that we have to come up with ways to like not get raped, but maybe giving them a way to be a hero in it.
It's called undoing. It's a defense mechanism. What do you do something bad like it? An example that I give in my classes is people with OCD to do it a lot. So you have obsessions, so you do compulsions to get undo it. But an example is if a person like steals from work or something, then they will feel bad, but it's kind of like repressed. They're feeling bad, so you will give a homeless person a dollar and the like, See, I'm a good person. I'm taking, but
I'm also giving. So you undo the bad thing giving giving advice. That's why I do that.
In this instance, the bad thing was not her yeah, you.
And telling her to get a dog.
We traumatized her by coming and breaking in her house, and then he undid it by giving her advice.
I know you're going to be traumatized. I know this is going to fuck you up for a while, and I'm really sorry. Like and he's got this guy. If you guys have got to watch American Nightmare. It's so good because there's so many twists and turns. It's only three forty five minute episodes. It's not too much. They fly by. I really recommend it. We'll be back up for this. Speaking of Netflix, I'm finished with Love on the Spectrum season two and it's incredible. Connor is my
favorite character no spoilers. James is another one. He's the one that talks like das and well, I do think that maybe we would be a good match. But she's a vegetarian. In the scheme of things, it isn't that bad. But and then Connor talks like this, and it's he talks like he's in a movie all the time.
We have a question cute about and then Danny I think episode seven of season two from Bestie Amanda, can I read it to you?
Yeah?
Okay, Well, I guess it's not really a question, it's a statement. I need Nikki to talk about the cupcake scene with Danny and Adan from Love on the Spectrum.
Yeah, Danny is Anya is a great impression of Danny. But she's talks like a cartoon care her because she is obsessed with animation. And she goes out with guys and she rejected this one guy because she was like, and what do you do for income? And does that make you income? She was.
In the last season.
Yeah, she was on last season too.
Yeah.
I haven't seen the new season, but I saw the last season, so I saw the clip. Is this couple weren't it a couple last season?
Or they went out on a date last season? Workout?
Yes?
And so now there she's like, I have been thinking about Adam or what I think it's Adam, but they say it's weird. I have been thinking a lot about him, and I think I want to give him another chance. And so they go out on another date and he and then they kind of collick and the things are going well, and they share a kiss, and she's commenting to her aunt who she lives with, that maybe his kissing wasn't the best, but it's something that he can
work on and can grow from. And she goes to the library gets all these books about sex and like TNTRA and like hell yeah, and she's like should I Sandy loves her aunt Sandy. She's like, Sandy, should I bring my books on my date? Because it's like, this is the next date where she's going to talk to him about premarital sex because he is Catholic and she's worried that he won't have sex before marriage. And she's like, that's just non negotiable for me, even though I don't
think she's had sex before. But so she goes to the date and the kiss, the kiss they shared. They're always sharing kisses on the show. The kiss they shared wasn't ideal for her, and so she goes on the date and she she asked him about premi dal sex. He is so flummixed by it and like nervous. But at first he's like, and I don't believe in premiarital sex.
And then he realizes like he's gonna lose her, and he's like, I could be open to the idea, and she's like, that's all I think that's a great idea, and so then and so then she's satisfied. And then she's like, I brought some cupcakes. And I was kind of half paying attended, so I don't remember if we knew about what the cup cake plan was, but she was like, I brought some cupcakes. And he's very excited about the cupcakes. Can I just say before this, like
a date, before this? She Oh God, he's walking up to her like they're greeting for the first time. She runs to him. It's so cute. She's excited to see him again. And he has this ring on, this big, like silver square ring, and she was like, I like your ring and he's like, oh you do not take a look. Well please, here you go, and he pulls it off to like hand it George. She goes, thank you, so much, and he's like, well, I'm not giving.
It to you.
It's like reiterating that he's not. I don't think there's any worse feeling in the world than when you think someone's giving you something and they're like, well, you can't have it.
No, I just say that.
That's the worst is I don't don't.
What I meant. Yes, Oh god, I've done it so many times. I'm like, oh, I look cute, and you're like, really, thank you. I'm like, no, I just meant you could look at it.
And so he's like, well, I'm not. Uh, it's not yours. I'm not parting ways. And then he's like, but I did make you this and it's like an identical but I guess it's a little bit uglier, and she goes, oh, thank you. Well it does remind me of you, because not everything's perfect. He's not even offended. He's like thank you. And then they go on these goddamn swan boats and they're having fun and then they have they share a
kiss and it's not ideal. So the next day she brings up these cupcakes and she tells him, you know, a really good way to practice kissing is to use a cupcake because you have to use your tongue and you lick it and then you like she's just telling him like, let's she's pretty much sing like that's practice kissing, Like let me teach you how to kiss by making this like a fun thing I heard about that people do.
And so he just wants to eat the cupcake and she's like, well, biting's not ideal, and she's so he they are on this part in public and she is full on making out with this cupcake and trying to show him and explain it to him. And it's so funny because he he's awkward at first, like he does you can tell he doesn't want to do it, but he just likes her so much that then he buys into it. And then he calls her teach at one point, which.
Is so funny because teach, Yeah, hot.
It's so hot because he acknowledged that, like she's kind of being a little bit bossy and he's a little not loving it, but it's just was a way to acknowledge it. It was just so cute. But I just love, like what would I do if I was dating a guy and I hated the way he kissed I don't think i'd have the ball, just that it even takes ball.
Just forcibly like push their tongue around, stop seeing them.
Yeah you just like then you let all this connection go because you don't have.
The courage to tell someone if we could have a cupcake.
The good thing about people with autism is that and I don't think this is a blanket statement, but I think that they aren't. Not only are they not scared to tell the truth when they receive the truth about themselves, they're not as horrified as Yeah, it doesn't not as much divergent people. Yeah, they don't like attach that much meaning to it. They're like, this is one thing and there's other things going on in my life. They don't like focus all of their energy on it like we do.
They don't. They're not like this means I'm a really stand person yea, and then I'm horrible. And so they can suffer a little bit of embarrassment. Like for instance, Connor is at this speed dating thing and each you know, he'll go like, well, how do you feel about nature? And the girl will be like, well, I'm kind of more of a city goal and he just like clicks and writes an X while she's sitting there under no
and and you see whether it's edited that way. You see her look at it, and I've told this before. But but the guy steps it in and goes, hey, you might want to wait till they're gone before this. And he is horrified when that happened, and he's like, oh, no, I knew i'd screw it up, but he doesn't like
it doesn't totally ruin his life. Like for me, if someone called out something that you've done this thing wrong twice in a row to two different people and might have hurt their feelings, I wouldn't feel so bad about it. I'd have to like leave, and they seem to just be able to roll with it.
I'd have to like apologize or something too.
Yeah, so much, Yes, and they apologize, but I think a lot of their it's just so fascinating because they like I was telling an example to a friend last night, trying to sell them on the show, and I'm like, it's just the honesty is so refreshing, Like like if they're if they are on a date with someone and then they were to the person was to smell bad. They've learned enough from going to therapies and different teachers that like, it is rude to tell someone they smell bad,
like they've learned that. They don't just like they know it from a rule that they rather.
Their parents are like, don't say that again. They're like, okay, guys, how change.
That's how we all learn it. Maybe, but for some reason, it seems like they're adhering to some kind of code that it's not like it's not just natural for them to keep things inside.
Well, we take that. We have social cues and we we are able to acknowledge like the unspoken. I feel like they need to be told the rules and then they follow the rules that they want.
Yeah, they don't have like natural pragmatism.
They have to be like but they might like make a face, like if something small enough, they might be like, or they.
Be like, I try this really deodorant. Maybe you could. I'll bring it to you. Yeah.
They're like passive, yeah, but not aggressive. It's sweet. It's like it's just there's So this show is amazing because it just highlights so many of the awkward things that happen in dating anyway, and they just kind of sit in it and and it just.
Don't just address it immediately instead of you you, we would have to In a normal dating show would be like, oh, he seemed defended, but they would never admit it, and we'd have to like be trying really hard to figure out what's going on.
Wait, what do you mean.
In a regular dating show, if somebody is offended, we're like, oh, she said something, he looked offended. Did you see him wins or whatever. But in this show, it's like, we knows, I'm quite offended by that comment. Yes, makes everything so clear.
Another thing I realized, which I think is not just people with autism, but they if you watch these shows, they don't seem to care. I want to be delicate when I say this because I don't want to make
they I think this is about human nature. I think you can get a better idea of how humans really want to be and how we are in our natural state from studying people who are neurodivergent, because they're not subscribing to all these social norms that are like keeping us in the cages of like being normal or whatever, so and adhering to like this is the way I have to sit, this is the way I have to act, and so they're just human. They're very human, and so
I found that on these dates. I don't know if you could give me an example of a single date, either on Love on the Spectrum or down for Love, where they actually care about what the other person is saying.
I didn't even know that sounds under people. Oh my god.
They ask questions because they know it's polite, but they don't ever really don't care, and they sometimes follow up because they've learned to go, tell me more about that. But I don't think they actually care what the other person is saying, and like they'll go like, that's interesting, but I and maybe they do. I don't want.
To be genuine, but don't there they I don't think autistic people don't care about what other people because that's what you could maybe glean from this, because you go, it's almost like they just want to talk about how many dinosaurs they know.
They don't really care about your favorite dinosaur, right, But the truth is, I think no one cares what other people think, and any sincere interest is it's kind of phony.
It's just like social inhibitions that we have that they don't have.
And I'm like, I'm interested in people. I do ask about people and be like, oh my god. Like my friend that I've been working with this week, I found out his parents have both died and I was just like, tell me about like what is that like? And I was fascinating then what he went through and everything? And I'm like, was that phony of me to ask that? But what did I really care what he went through? Or am I asking for myself because I'm scared what's
going to happen? Is everything self motivated? Is everything trying to get like is about me?
Yes?
I think it depends. It depends on the person. It depends on the relationship you have with the person, Like some people are like, imagine you're in love. I mean, I guess it is still self motivated. Like if you're infatuated with someone, you have a crush on someone and then you want to know everything about them at all all times. Maybe that's self motivated because you're like using that information too, yeah, or you want to like.
But you look up to people and you want to know how you can be more like them. I mean, I think that's what.
But I think the motivation versus are you interested in what they have to say? Is two different things. Like you could be. And also we just don't know what these what these kids are thinking on the inside, Like they could be seem they could seem like they don't care, but actually they're like registering this one. That's I want to point out that you do learn a lot from about autism from watching shows like this, but this is also like, uh, the cast they were cast it like
there is I want to see. There's probably like dozens and dozens of people who interviewed for this show who got rejected because for various reasons. It's like, I don't think all autistic people act like the people on this show. These are like the best of the best. These are like, oh, this is kind so sweetest. There's probably like Jeremy, who's an autistic asshole who didn't get on the show because he kept, you know, cursing at the people who are interviewing him and stuff.
Yeah, they're not all these gentle everything smine, yes are yes, but.
The one I've worked with astic There's got to be some autistic assholes out there.
I got to say people down syndrome. I got some d MS from when I would because I said this before, Like I'm sure there's some really mean, people down syndrome and people that know a lot about it are like, not really, there's not it's not a thing.
It's not like they don't have the ability to be assholes, because what makes us assholes but they don't developmental stuff, Yeah, like trauma that is being processed and making us like bitter and stuff they don't like they're developed both autism and on cinder MR developmental disorders. So something got kind of stuck. Wait, don't it.
Isn't down syndrome more like genetic.
Yeah, chromosomal, but it allows it makes it so that, you know, cannot progress past certain levels developmentally.
One of my favorite moments of this season of Love on the Spectrum is there's this guy, I forget his name. He's the one that has a really big mouth and he talks like this and he's excited all the time. He gives people high fives, he's like in that great, that's gonna be great, and he's like so excited all the time. And he's Southern. He lives in Clemson, South Carolina, and his whole thing is like I bring joy to
the world. And that's kind of like I was wondering at first when he starts saying that like, is this a thing you like to do or is this a thing people have told you that you are you know, like I think some people when they have a disability, their parents in the community can be like, all you do is spread joy, and that can kind of become what they are about, even though they have so much
more going on than that. But then I'm like, no, this guy seems to be really jazzed all the time, high fiving everyone, so excited to see everyone, remembers everyone's name, like, loves his life. It's just happy for everyone, so so sweet. But then he has this moment with the woman that it's like helping these people learn how to date, and is talking to them about, now, where would you stand if you were walking at the zoo with someone that you were dating. He's like, oh, I'd stand in front.
I'd stand in front, and she goes, okay, let's see what that would look like. And then he walks in front and she goes, now, what's wrong with this? Is there?
Is it?
Can I see you right now? And he goes, no, you can't see me, ma'am, you can't see me, and she's like, well, maybe it would be better if we stood next to each other, Now, how does this feel? And so she's she's coaching him and then she gets on the phone with him and she's talking about he's he has this moment where his face kind of like looks a little worried, and she goes, what's going on? Or do you seem or are you seem nervous or you seem like you're thinking about something. He's like, I'm
just scared. I'm just scared that I might not have anything to say that. And that's a big fear with all these people, is that they're gonna run out of things to say, which is so normal because that is I really relate do you love on the spectrum? Because I am someone who if you listen to my podcast during the COVID and the Not Say podcast, I was really worried about going on dates because I'm like, what if I have to, like I have to like marry them if I go on on a date, Like I
was like Connor. Connor has this thing where if he says yes on a scorecard for speed dating, He's like, now I must be married to her for life and we will be buried next to each other. He's jumping so far ahead, but that's I totally relate to that, like, and his family's all like, Connor, dude, this is just about meeting someone. You meeting someone you don't need to This isn't gonna be the girl you married, doesn't have to be that. But I'm like, I used to jump
to that too, so I really related to that. But she says to him, he's like, I'm really worried. I'm not gonna have anything to say. And she's like, well, that's okay. You can be quiet, you know, like just because you're not talking doesn't mean you're not having a good time. You guys can sit in silence together. And he's like, okay, okay, and she goes, is there a part of you that feels like you always have to be happy and smiling. He's like, yes, ma'am, Yes there is, Yes,
there is. And it's just like all of a sudden, this like this, they peeled back this layer of him, and she was like, I'm sensing that is it true that if if you don't he might even have said it that if he's not smiling all the time, people will think he's mad, and like, for some reason, that to him is so scary that someone could think he was mad, And boy, I think everyone can relate to that of like if you if I'm not participating in the conversation lively and I'm not smiling and like laughing,
people might get people everyone might assume I'm mad, And it's like I sometimes have to like fake it just so people don't just wait, don't become a focus of attention like Nicky's mad, because I do think people sometimes don't smile and don't laugh and don't participate in conversation because they want everyone to know that they're mad, yes, And I don't want that. Sometimes I just don't have the energy. Yes, So sometimes you have to like get it up because you're like, I just don't want to
be someone who looks like that. So it's all these like struggles that they have are so relatable and like I love on the dates when they just talk about like what are you looking for and a partner and and they're just like, do you want a handsome boy? And she's like yes, She's like do you wanna do you want a partner that talks a lot? Yes? Do
you want someone who likes cupcakes? Yes? And like they just like they just fire off these questions, but they're like asking for validation that they are liked in this moment, and it's just like it's just so honest and so sweet, and it really does make you think, like, man, if I had like a big family, I'd want one of
my kids to be autistic because it makes everyone so empathetic. Like, and this isn't every family, And you're right, they'd hand selected like these families to be really examples of amazing families that these people grew up with. Yeah, but Connor's family, for instance, like the cool daughter who's like nineteen and hot, and then the son who's like twenty two and just
like a total like Georgia hot, a college guy. They're both like you would think that they would be like so TikTok checked out, but they're both so emotionally involved in like and touched by their older brother who's autistic, and they're just so there's so much more down to earth and mature than I think they would be if they didn't have that. I think it's good for a family fact that's about people down to the drum in NASA and they're it's a new reality show.
Well just to.
Burst.
Like I feel like sometimes I come in and I take a pin and I just pop burst it a bubble, come on in. So, uh, you know the thing with families and autistic kids. I have a friend and he has two sons with like really severe autism, and the you know, like the difficult side of that is that he and his wife have to live in two separate homes with each son. And the sons, you know, they have like, well, at least the one that I met, hash verbal difficulties and in schools and stuff with teachers.
Only now and he's I think he's a senior in high school. He can be with a teacher alone because he would have violent outbursts and like the dad has shown me the bruising and everything, and it's not like malicious, it's just you know, how this kid copes and stuff.
So yeah, I'm not saying, yeah, it's a specter.
That are high up on the spectrum on the show.
When I was growing up on Long Island and my neighbor lived in a little house, uh, he was autistic and he had a wife and he would every few years he would beat his wife. And we knew that he beat his wife because he had a pattern where he would beat his wife and then he would strip down naked, and then he would walk around town. And whenever this guy was walking around town naked, we knew he'd just beat his wife because then he could go back to his house and his wife would be there.
And then just one time and he would He used to throw potatoes over the fence into my yard to try to get my dog to eat the potatoes, and we asked him to stop, and then he did stop, and then he started throwing peanut butter and jelly sandwiches over the fence, and we said, no, it applies to all foods, please don't. But then one day he beat his wife. His wife called the police. He was stripping down naked, and then the cops came to his house
and he tried to take one of the cops guns. Yeah, and so then he went to jail after that, and they had to move out of the house and then the house was knocked down. But uh, that guy then he looted it. That guy, yeah, and then I took his bath. But that guy's not going to be on love on the spectrum any times, dude.
No, he's not.
There's like a there's that.
It's just it's a heartwarming show, and it makes me really like love, love, the idea of family and and just yeah, it's just and and love and also it just is it's just study in human nature. And then I turned on American Nightmare, and I'm like, what the
fuck is this shit? I mean, that's just like God, I thought, you know what, I was almost glad about it, because I think we've gotten away from this like believe all women thing, Like I think in recent years, I think there was an influx of like, if a woman says she's raped, let's just trust her by default, and
then there was like a backlash to that again. And now I think this show is like showing again like can we just just start believing women because in the city, say that this girl is not believed about being ready, Like there's trigger warnings all over this thing if you are assault victims.
That's why I allegedly steal cop cars to get back.
But then but then there's there's there's there's a happy ending, there's good things about this.
It's pretty wild how quickly that came and went. I feel like we believed women for like two and a half years.
Do you feel like that too. It really went away.
There's another thing on Netflix about that. I can't remember what it's called, but it's about a girl. And then it goes into lots of different stories about women that aren't believed and prosecuted for lying about rapes that were actually committed on them, so they get in trouble for admitting it. Oh, which I'm not. I don't think I can watch it because I'll get too.
No, I can get too. Can you imagine if we're not even like assault victims, like we don't have that we can speak for myself. I don't have that. That his street and even I was just like enraged watching this, and I was just like, it's just like you being at k.
You remember, Curson had a boyfriend who's whose email dress was enraged at ku dot com. So whenever heard the word enraged, I think enraged at Ku.
God. I wonder if my old college email addresses what's going.
Crypt keeper is hot at hotmail dot com. I hope it's not taken.
That was yours.
For a while, I was wait email dress till I was like twenty six, and then I was like, I guess I should change it.
Mine was Dave Matthews is hot, but it looks like Dave Matthews.
I shot, No, my friends thought it was crypt keeper.
I shot, yeah, yeah, that's what it does look like. But I had that for hours.
Were another Mickey Rooney in three two one that was like our joint account.
Mine was it's got a break.
Okay, no wait, okay, well we'll find it when we get back from the break. We'll find out. All right, we're back, Brian, what was your first what was your weirdest email address?
Wasn't weird? It was Goldenslumbers thirty one at aol dot com, which because of the song, because of the song my favorite Beatles song, and I just an embarrassing moment. There was probably the most popular girl in my high school. We were on AIM and there's another I'm Brian, and there's another kid in my high school class also named Brian, and his last name was Golden, so his name was Brian Golden, and my address was my aame name was Golden Slumbers thirty one, which is confusing to people in
my high school. But then one day I just worked up the courage to aim instant message the most popular girl in my school, and I said hey, and Brian, and she's got Golden Brian and she was like, who is this? And I said, this is Brian and she and then she talked to me thinking I was Brian Golden the whole time, and I actually think that they started dating. But because of you, I did that thing, like do you. I did that stupid thing that people do when they're in high school and they're losers and
they go, guess who this is? They go, hey, what's up? Hey, what's up? Hey? Dot dot dot? Who is this?
And I was like, guess, oh, you still remember, dott, I remember every part of that. And then she was there anyone.
Brian Golden And I was like no, because I said money, I said it's Brian. She said Brian Golden. I was like no eventually, but then I then it made me realize that, oh wait, I am that this is confusing. It would be like thirty one, right, It would be like if someone named Nikki in your high school had an aim name that was like Glazer Ross three oh one or something.
Yes, so, but did you have any like when you would go through that and you have this aim conversation and you're like thinking so much about it and you remember exactly the Hey dot the and like, did you have guy friends that you would like call and be like, man, I just I am you know, I just a I am No. I think that was just a process. It alone.
Embarrassment sad for people who don't have never share about it. Like, there's rarely something embarrassing that happens to me that I can't share with someone.
Immediately, my pants immediately.
Immediately, there's a place to go where everybody knows name.
I took my live with the consequences until today and where I shared it with you.
Well, so how did you realize that she thought you were the.
Other Brian because she said Brian Golden and I said.
Hopefully exactly.
He was more popular than me at the time. I think we kind of evened out eventually. He was much more popular than me. He like surfed, he like skateboarded. I think he was on the football team, and I was just like, I like, uh.
Was Frandre, don't Yeah?
That year, that was the year I got rejected from the high school improv team, which was dissolved, and then I was also rejected from the volleyball team. The men's volleyball I tried out for the men's volleyball team. The first year and the first year I tried out, it was a walk on team, like you could just join the team, because no men wanted to be on the team. This isn't California, this is New York. There's not men's volleyball. So they were just like, if you want to play
men's volleyball, go ahead, I guess. And so it's a coach, there's no.
Guess, go ahead, wear shorts.
So I went and I and I went to the open. Uh just walk on. And they decided that year, for the first year, they were going to do cuts, and they cut two people, Me and this other guy, Seth Levy, who is uh is you know? Seth Levy looks like what you would imagine a nerdy guy who wouldn't get cut from the that would get cut from the volleyball team would look like, yeah, and you're a tall guy.
I was pretty tall. And then the next year, I think Seth Levey made the team, I'm pretty sure, and I was the only one that got cut got out of God, they were I don't know. And then well that's why I survived it by doing this the musicals, I moved on I said sports. I can't make the basketball team, I can't make the volleyball team. I guess I'm gonna be in musicals.
Yeah, that's kind of I wasn't good at sports, but I wanted to do sports because my friends did it, and I wanted to just hang out with my friends. That's why I did field hockey. And then all my friends made varsity and I was still JV. I just didn't want to do it anymore. I had a horrible stints once too. I couldn't walk, And then that's when I auditioned for plays and I wasn't even getting Yeah, you carried me when I had horrible I couldn't walk with my It was you were like screaming.
I was like, I couldn't even.
It was wild.
What happened into me with my shinsplins like your bone have a little like there's.
Yeah, the it gets when you slap your foot down. I had like anterior shin splints. So when you were your foot slaps down when you're running, that muscle gets like stretched too much and it's, oh, you know, it just gets overstretched.
And I thought it was like the bone.
Oh it's not the Yeah, it's like tendon ninis on your shins, and it was I had been both and it was horrible. But I loved it because you could push on it and like hurt it, and it felt so it hurt to walk, but when you push on it, but if you ran with shion splints didn't hurt walking horrible, it would go away. It's almost like my foot pint pain. When I'm wearing high heels on stage, I don't feel it at all, and then the second I saw off
the stage, it starts hurting. It's so strange. But I I remember I auditioned for the Diary of Anne Frank and I really thought I was going to get it.
I thought I was.
Gonna get the lead. Yeah, I could wear a wig. Yes, I knew I was going to get it. And not only did I not get it, I got Jewish townsperson.
Oh my god be.
And that's I think. Actually, that's when I went back to field hockey. I was going to leave field hockey. Then I went to Jewish experience is me and my Yeah, my joke was that the position I played for a field hockey was a Jewish townsperson. B That's how it felt like I was always just like, I just wanted to be bench the whole time. I just wanted to wear the skirts, have fun. That little you know, that tape that they foam like foam rap that they wrap
over injuries. We used to take that and tie it and make it a hair band.
That was.
So on brand for Nicki Glazer. Like Nicki Glazers riding the bench, That's that's what she wants to do. You don't want to play in the game, but you love sitting there.
I don't want balls coming at me where I have to do something with it and all the attentions on me. And I'm going to let on a whole team now if it's me and the ball alone, yeah, let me figure out how to do this. It's all me. You can't compare me to anything actively. I like solo sports, I like swimming, I like running. I want to be alone. I don't want other people to depend on me, and I don't. And I would like to depend on others, but I don't. I don't want them to have to depend on me.
You get to go to the pasta party before the game, you go to Pizza Hut after the game. You get to ride the bus together, and then you get to the game. You don't have to do anything.
And you get to be done.
At some point.
You the bus sea swim practice, going into people's lockers, stealing things, not even steeling things, just stealing photographs.
Had we stole cowboy hats one time? We did?
Yeah, we we wore them all around. And you were a really bad influence.
He would the locker and be like, but you left your flashlight on. That's why I want.
Into injection, the constant fucking rejection of being bad at everything you try.
You got to be told where's your name? But it also forges great. I mean, you need to be slammed down again and again, and most of those people will just dwindle and languish.
If I wouldn't have fallen to stand up, what would I have I could have? I was just throw I couldn't do any there was nothing else for me to do. I was not good at anything. I was not exceptional.
And you're very smart. You could do lots of smart things.
But I didn't. I didn't None of them were impressive to people, and I wasn't that smart. I were really I was. I got a's and b's, I wasn't I couldn't get straight in.
Oh, just imagine all the TV and movies you could have done in the background.
Saying all the townspeople bees. I could have been and I just would have I don't know what I would have done, but it's just that that like just feeling like you're you're like yesterday, I cried in my voice lesson because I'm like.
I am so tired of being average in here, Like I'm so tired of not being exceptional in any part of this process.
There's not even one part of singing that I'm good at that I'm just a natural at, Like, well, you get that under control. But I try so hard and that's the problem. It's like it's just not clicking for me. And I cried and and he was really nice about it, and he always lets me cry in there because it often comes out in there. And he and because I was going into final thought, I was, I have to I'm writing a song and performing a song for my special that's gonna go with the end of my special,
because yeah, you didn't know that's what happened. So I was gonna like pick a song, but to even so, there's no budget left like we've used all the money and so there's no money left, so anything would come out of my pocket to even check on how much a song is going to be. It's eight hundred dollars, so that's out of my pocket to even go like, why can I use this song.
Sang for what part of that costs eight hundred Just no idea.
It's just a charge so they can make more money. And then you find out it's gonna be thirty thousand dollars, So it's eight o dollars to find out it's gonna be thirty thousand dollars, which I'm not spending thirty thousand dollars on a song. I'm just not gonna do it. So then I was like, Okay, well, maybe I can use one of Anya's songs, one of Matt pond songs, but if they cut me a deal, it's gonna be ten thousand, you know, Like I'm sorry, I just don't
have that money to toss around. And it's at the end of the thing, it's not as you know, important as like the first song. So I was like, oh, I said to Chris, like what if I like write a song and like record it, that'll only cost me a couple thousand to produce it, and if I write it myself, I don't to pay myself to do that. And he was like, yeah, I mean if you want
to do that, but I could. And then we just put the pieces into motion and called his brother Tim, who is uh, you know, in the band Ludo and knows a ton of music people and he knows this, you know, pop produce because I wanted to be like a pop song. So he knows this pop producer and from Chicago named uh Dan Monahan. He's in a band called the Dog and Everything. Dog and Everything and they're kind of popular. But do you remember that.
Band kind that sounds really familiar?
Yeah?
Was it nineties?
It's like a midots early two thousands into like later two thousands, so and they're still together. So anyway, he flies down to Saint Louis. We're in the recording studio all week. I They're like, it's gonna be easy, just come in, we'll write a song. And I'm like, what, I don't I have no idea here. I can't just
like show up. And this is like, you know, I'm paying someone for their time, so I'm not gonna waste someone's time of being like, so I just wanted to need to write a song, like what do you guys have? And I and I want to control it. So I kind of like came up with something to bring in anyway, we write this song, and and yesterday we were getting into more of it, and so I went to a voice lesson to like prepare to sing it, and and this voicelessen. I'm just like, I just don't even deserve
to be making this song. And he's like, you need to stop this. And I was like, it's like it's really interesting advice because it's just like it's not like where do you think this fear is coming from? What what does this fear represent? He was just like, shut up, you need to flip a switch and stop it. Like it's just he goes, you just need to. You just have to. There's no other choice, Like you don't have to.
You have to choose to stop feeling that way. You have to choose to believe that you deserve this and that this is what you need to do. And it's not really that, it's not really that complicated. You just gotta do it, like you gotta do anything, like you got to show up for work, like you gotta make your plane even though you're tired, Like you just have to do it. And so it was just like this.
I don't know how he really got to me, but for some reason a thing flipped where it was just like it's not And then I was watching all these tiktoks and there's been an influx of reels about I guess. Tony Robbins was on the THEOVONN podcast and he was like, did you see that clip of like look around the room? He tells him to look around the room and look at everything yellow. Make it, make a document of everything
yellow in this room. Okay, all right, now close your eyes. Now, if I told you to tell me everything that's red in this could you.
Tell me No, I can't think of even one thing.
Okay, So now look around, look at all the red things. Okay, there's there's hints of red. Now what that proves is if you're looking for it, you'll find it. If you're if your story you're telling you're about yourself is I'm shit, You're gonna find evidence of that all the time. Now, if you're looking for evidence that I'm great, you're gonna find that everywhere, and when you're looking at red, how many things are you kind of like, well, that's maroon, but I'm gonna say it's red just so I have
another red thing. So you're gonna not only take, but it's kind of a shade of red. So what you'll do if you like look at the world of like, let me find evidence I'm great, You'll think you'll you'll take even things that aren't that great, and you'll amplify them just to find evidence. So it's like it was just a good little reminder of like just act as if. But then it's like you feel so stupid, uh like pretending, and then you start to like compare and you can't compare.
But why can't you compare? Of course you can compare. There are people that are better. But then go, well, some people don't even some people don't want to hear a perfect voice. Sometimes people want to hear a fucked up voice. And it's like I know that, but like most people want to hear a good.
Voice, right, Yeah, it's the smart person's you're too smart. You're too smart to to accept things like that that'll make you happy. You really need to learn the art of pretending. To be stupid. You have to just be stupid and then you will stop questioning that Tony Robbins thing and you will just be happier. Smart people need to pretend to be That's all it is. It's just learn to be stupid and stop questioning everything and stop figuring out reasons why the things are the way they are.
And yeah, because I I appreciate your my problem that you're saying, my problem is I'm too smart, But like I have been doing this thing recently where I call it robot mode, where if I'm so overwhelmed by a feeling or like feeling this despair or feeling bad about myself or hating myself, I'm like turn into a robot
and protend just do what a robot would do. I need feel, I need to sleep, I need to sit like oh, like I was on a plane and I was about to like I was in a really cramped seat, and I was about to fire off an email being like why am I in boarding group seeing all these things? And then I was just like a robot wouldn't care about their seat. They would just like be They're just a room, my room, but doesn't go like I can't
believe I have to fucking do this today. You know, it just is like I'm a robot, so.
You're getting to that point pick up your cereal once.
I think the next model got a little in about But yeah, like I think there's something to that of like just make your robots obviously are there's an intelligence to them, but there's not like an emotionality, so like turn it off, be more robotic, don't feel everything. But then some would argue that feeling is gonna go somewhere and it's gonna fucking You're gonna have to deal with
the creative. But that's creativity also, so you don't want to deprive yourself of your your feelings because that's ye.
Red eye and fly eight hours to.
Get we're talking about the songwriting process.
Yeah, the song thing though, like the robot thing is like I'll turn into a songwriting robot. Like songwriting robots do not feel. They do not have self awareness of like you've never done this before. They're not like focused on like this is the first time you've done this. So even like three out of four of your best friends sing better than you do, uh, like you uh, you have to pay people to even want to do this with you because you're such a joke. You're your
Bob Saggetts. Song got made fun of so much. This is gonna get made fun of too, Like I have to turn off all of the robot would not take that data and make robot just make song. I make I'm song robot, and you just do it. And and it's so tough. And writing songs is cool because it's
better than writing jokes. It's it's harder. I think we've talked about this before, but now there's a song that exists, a full song that didn't exist two days ago, and I will know it forever because you don't forget joke. You don't forget songs like you forget jokes like I forget jokes I told on a special ago. I'm like, oh I don't. I watch myself sometimes and be like, how's this one gonna end? And I have no fucking clue. But I'll never ever forget the song. It's like this
thing just came out of nowhere. It's like I'm an engineer that developed built a computer. Like it just feels like that's a really cool thing.
I don't know if you were making like hundreds and hundreds of songs though, like, do you remember the song you sung on F Boy, No, that's a song.
If you started singing it, I would probably be able to pick it up.
But yeah, I also think perform I mean, if you have the musical talent to play an instrument, I think performing music is easier than performing comedy because you're not relying on the audience's reaction. For I mean, people could be talking over your musical set and it's like kind of normal. But comedy you have to like engage with the audience and get and get it, and you're trying to elicit a specific response from them, and that's scary.
It's so when I go to my dad's gigs, people talk the whole time. No one's paying attention. It literally is like just music playing in an elevator, like no one gives it and it's this guy singing, and it's like, people don't just sit and listen to music unless it's like background noise. But if you were performing in the same places that my dad is, and you were a comedian and people were talking over it, it would be you would look and singing yeah, and it would be
so embarrassing. It's and my dad definitely feels it. And it's just like, ah, they were talking a lot, like and it bums them out a little bit. But it's not like I had the worst show ever. Whereas if people were talking that much during the comedy show, you there is not If people don't listen to you, there's nothing.
You would start yelling at them. That's what you try. Imagine if your dad started he was playing the shut of dates.
You know, But I'm really excited about the song is a fucking bop. It's so fun. It's like uplifting, but it's depressing and it's like it's everything that I wanted to be. It might be the exact now that you're thinking thinking about it, I'm like, I think I maybe used the same melody as the not but I mean
I wrote that. I don't think I did. But like that's the problem with writing songs, is like you were like, this is another song, like this sounds too catchy, that this can't be something that I stole from?
Are they not all taken like every melody? How has it not already been done? I know?
And I sent them like three different tailors songs where I'm like I think this is what I think I stole this from her and they're like, no, it's just like you're inspired by her. But this isn't this isn't.
This like Three Blind Mice. That's just hot cross Buns and.
Twinkle tink a Little Star is happy Birthday or something?
Right?
Yeah, it's all like the same chord.
No, no, no, no no, it's tingle tinkle little Star. It's oh A B C D E F G.
Yeah, isn't that crazy?
Anything else is the birthday song? Because that song's a hell.
The birthday song?
Oh yeah, the birth happened? Yeah, that is hell.
Hell. You can't sing that? Actually? Is that not allowed now that you can sing happy birthday?
It is?
Yeah, it's I think it's like with Mickey Mouse. It's public domain.
Now. For years, you couldn't say it on TV or something, no birthday on TVs that you're.
Saying, yeah, for until like a couple of it became yeah, yeah, the birthdays, the birthday family losers.
Yeah they're dead now because I can say they're losers. But public domain.
I was thinking this is maybe one of the this is a controversial thing, but I was thinking when we were talking about buying music to do for my special. I was like, you know what I could do? Probably, No, this is nuts and Swifties, don't get mad at me. I'm just saying if I were an evil person, this is what I would do. I could probably buy an Oridge an old Taylor Swift song from Scooter Braun for very cheap, because no one's listening to those, the original versions,
the Taylor's version. It's sacrilegious to even because she reades Sitter listening to the originals because she doesn't own them and she redid them all and we don't need those anymore, like they're done, like and but I could probably buy them for nothing. And I could have a Taylor Swift original song in my special for very cheap if I was but.
I would be be boycotted.
Well yeah that's what I'm saying. But it's just it's just funny that I could, and it would be the most the greatest artist of all time I could have. I can't even afford us a song from an artist you've never even heard of, because they're thirty thousand dollars. But I could probably get a Taylor Swift song for a couple grand from Scooter bron because no one's using them, no one, and he would probably sell it to me.
Just to spike her scooter for one.
But that's just like I find it to be very interesting that that could be the case that you could have the most famous singer songwriter on the planet. I have one of their songs for very cheap. If you go about if you pretty much, if you have no screws you want to if you yeah, But I would never even do that, But it's just funny that you could. The opportunity is there. It would be legal, that's wild.
I don't know which one I would use if it's for sale and we don't know how much it's gonna cost, I mean.
Or they would charge a lot.
You would think they would show up in like commercials and stuff like there. There's there's evil people out there who would love to let the Taylor Swift song. I think they could get away with it.
If a single, no they the Swifties. No, if it's spread around that at and t was using you know, blank space from the original nineteen eighty nine, it would be it. I mean, Taylor, it would be over like they their stock would drop like it would be horrible.
But what about the radio. Don't they play the old ones?
They shouldn't anything the radio.
When it comes on.
Well, they also new ones. New ones sound the same. They sound exactly the same. Her voice is more mature and are arguably a lot better. But she really she got all the same musicians, did everything exactly the same, which is the amazing part about it.
Yeah, all right, that's.
All I have to say. We gotta go. We gotta go record this song. But I'm excited for people to hear and I hope I get to play it at shows and stuff. It'll be so fun. Thank you for listening to the podcast. We're going to be at the super Bowl next week. I'm excited about that, but we have some shows for you before then. Don't worry about it. I am going to be on tour again in March. I'm taking February off. I'm also going to the Grammys
last wing. Wow, I'm not going to I could go to the Grammys, but I got invited to Stephen Tyler's Grammy party, and that I've.
Heard is funny. Really have to take my pictures, get into his closet.
And there's gonna be like I don't think it's at his house, but I could be wrong. He's hosting anyway, the same vocal cord Surgeon. I'm just flying to la just for that party, but I think I might if Dealers With is performing at the Grammys. I'm going to try to go to the Grammys and then go to the party afterwards. But I think I just want to go to the party instead of the Grammys because the party is I think the Black Keys are playing at the party like they have.
Like huge performers. Yes, you might be able to get a picture on the red carpet at the Grammys, and that's, as you know, is worth more than maybe just go to the red carpet then leave.
I don't even think I can get on the red carpet the Grammys. I feel like they won't let me on. You have to have like a publicist get you on. I mean, I don't know, And I feel at a place with the Grammys because I'm not as like I just people be like, what are you doing here?
So Trevor was hosting the Grammys this year, Like, don't you feel like you're on the same level as Trevor. No, he's the host.
No, No, someday, but no, Someday I'll be able to host these shows. Someday I'll be as big as Joe Koy. All right, thank you so much for listening. We'll see you next week. Andy.
How about Joe Kerr? What no oh?
Still now