The Nicky Gliser Podcast.
Niki Glaser pos Nikki.
Hello here, I am welcome to the show. It's the Nicky Glaser Podcast. I am in my home studio with my dad. Is our special guest today. Hello EJ. Glazer. How's it going?
Hello, there're thrilled to be here.
Yeah, it's gonna be fun. We just spent a whole morning together and then we're traveling to do a special thing that we can't talk about. But yeah, we're just uh, we're hanging out. We spent yesterday together. I was over at your place for a few hours yesterday just getting some quality time and some qts.
It's incredible. I know we haven't spent much time elater lately. Remind me of you being with the stour in the pandemic.
I asked Anya and Brian and now are here and over the weekend, Anya was like talking to her parents. They like they call. Probably they talk every day, I think. And I was like, how often do you talk to your parents? And she was like probably every two days every day.
Yeah.
And she was like like as much as you do.
And I'm like, she's a great daughter.
No, it's not as good as you.
I always reprimand Nicky and I used to call my mom at least once a week on Sundays, and NICKI sometimes we go weeks the week we communicate. I follow her on Instagram and so.
Forth, and yeah, we're even sliding in my DX all the time.
There's nothing like talking to somebody, idea, any that's true. Messages just don't do it.
But I don't like to call home because first of all, Mom's always in the background, and I can hear her laying down, like you answer the speakerphone, and she's like has a blanket over her head and she barely wants to talk to me. And then she's just going, why do you even say it?
In there?
Like I have to like deal with her kind of chiming in in weird ways. And then I can tell I'm always interrupting a show. You guys are watching it. Mom wants to get back to the show, but you want to keep talking to me, And I feel like I'm just like I'm taking away things that Mom wants
to do. Mom, every time you call her, no offense. Mom, I know you're listening, But Lauren and I say, whenever you call Mom, I'll let you go and she's just even here, like the goodwill racks, like even hear the the what is it called the hangars on the Yeah, uh huh what is it? How much is over? That's what she does, bringing out those racks. Wait, so when are Nikki?
Where are you?
When are you leaving such a bad mother?
I don't know, cop out, It's it's always I'll let you go when they mean is I have to go?
I want to.
Talking to you.
I can tell that you're busy and can't talk to me anymore, so I'll let you go.
I'll do you a favor.
Nikki.
You are always busy. This would be Mom if she heard this. You're always busy. I'm trying to let you go. But I called you and I'm quietly in a room. But I will say, I always call what I'm on a commute. That's what I want to talk. Like, if I really have a loane time, I'm not going to just like walk around my room quietly talking to you. Like you're really good about just you'll be at home. Dad. You just call your friends and you just go into the room and you just sit down and call your friends.
You're also a guy to just sit down and like read a book on a couch, like I need to read a book, like what I'm like trying to fall asleep, but you'll just go like it's time to read right now. And a balance, like it's the most balanced person I know.
No, maybe it's my Sam Harris meditation. I you know, I can actually focus on something and not be distracted. When I watch television with your mom, she's always looking at her phone, sliding through. Like last night we were watching a show and it's it's a show that was the last episode of something. We're watching on Amazon. We're watching The Boys. No, I wish it. I wish it would We were watching if you're watching jen v at No no having really good Anyway, it's called God darn It.
It's about Christopher Walkins in it. It's a BBC production and a bunch of I can't remember the name of it.
It's okay, Brian's on it. Ye'll find out.
Anyway, we're watching this conclusive episode and she's scrolled through. I'm like, what are you looking at? She's looking at shoes and then she'll asked me, but what did he say? And I'm like, you have to focus on one thing or the other You can't humans can't multitask.
No is it called the Outlaws?
The Outlaws? You got it?
Thank you, you've seen it.
A good job.
Way to go, Brian, Yeah, there's He was scrolling on his phone while you were talking. He didn't hear the end of the story about mom not listening to good show.
I highly recommend it. A little bit, a little bit ludicrous, but really well done and it's got some really My.
Dad's a fan of the Morning Show, though, so I just want to prepare everyone if you recommend. Yeah, I thought I could really talk some shit with my parents about the Morning Show because we are kind of have the same taste level. But no, my dad is a big fan. He likes it. He thinks the dialogue is superb.
I do.
How can you watch? I'm going to start collecting pieces of dialogue from it and you and you have to defend them.
I think it's going to be a new game that would be good because it just shows the inner the you know, the previous seasons were, of course great. I think you all agree on that first two I agree, and this one. I just like the inner workings of the business dealings and how they're trying to save the network and trying to get the loans.
Following the plot, Yeah, I'm just looking at shoes. I was unclear why crout up is raising money for UBN because.
They're trying to save it, trying to say they have no money. They're they're programming, they're it's falling off the charts.
That's very.
Say to be like, I'm interested in how they're acquiring those loans.
Well, you've been on the corporate side of.
Things, and they're doing the upfronts, which I used to be a little bit of part of. But yeah, I just like I like seeing the inner workings of that and how he's trying to muster all the talent to go out there and meet with the ad executives.
To smooth I didn't like that the upfronts. By the way, upfronts are when a network is debuting their new slate of shows and like what are fall programming is going to look like? And it's all for ad buyers to come advertising, you know, people from the advertising world to come and place ads like, oh my god, their lineup looks amazing. I can't wait to buy ad space on these shows. And so it's like this big show I performed at a bunch of upfronts.
Like Huge Stars and make a huge production.
One with Gomez. Yeah, I was one of one with Selena Gomez and and Sarah and I hosted one back in the day for MTV and and yeah, but I didn't like on the morning show. Billy crud Up gets there and he's like walking down the hallway and it's like this one shot and you can tell they really pat themselves on the back for like we did it all in one shot, and it's like it wasn't that
big a deal and no one really needed it. And then they get But I know a lot of work goes into those, so I don't want to be too snarky. So then he gets to the very like bottom recesses of this like theater building, and then he sits in hair and makeup and they powder him and they go two minutes until showtime until you're on and he's in the recesses of this wing and Chris and I are watching it and he's like talking to himself in the mirror to get himself amped up. Do you remember that scene?
Sure?
And I'm like, if you have two minutes before you're walking on stage, you don't have time to talk in the mirror. It's time you need to walk upstairs. And Chris is like, oh so a prosy, Like that's just like they should have just said five minutes or something. You know, two minutes is like you gotta go, you gotta walk.
And a lot of these series shows you will reproy. I'll see it too, you know they show a plane landing for so long and somebody brushing there. They're just trying to fill time, you know, so many times, like him walking down the hallway. It might have been somewhat interesting, but.
Yeah, it was fine.
Like the beginning of every eighties comedy is like the alarm goes off, then he gets out of bed, then he goes and brushes his teeth, then he.
Makes it off.
Everything so true, That is so true.
We have to see the moment he woke up this day.
Not yeah, well it was funny because today my dad and I went to I took my dad to one of my voice lessons, which was fun, and on the way there, my dad was like, oh, this is the part of town where do you remember that camping trip that we went on and those men said bring those girls back when they're eighteen, and I was like, I just told that story yesterday on the podcast, and then you.
Were bring her back now because I made.
Yesterday well when I was eighteen, I said, do you we need to go back to those guys?
Do you remember that?
Yeah?
And you couldn't believe I.
Made that joke.
Yeah. So we went to the voice lesson today and learned some techniques fun just like putting the putting them sound like out of your note, like shooting it up and out of your nose, like into up here instead of like out here or down here. And when you go for a high note, you're not supposed to actually think hi, you're supposed to think low. And when you're going for a low note, you're supposed to think high
and not low. And all these mental tricks that there are to make the best sound, and it's hard.
I have a question game.
It's like pilates for your head.
What you know.
How Rappers before they do the before they wrap, they'll go like, uh oh all right, yeah, is there like a practical.
Purpose for that, like that they're hearing something trying.
To get on the rhythm, huh, Like it's just trying to It's like tapping your foot, but like almost waking up your vocal chords or like trying to get maybe trying to let people know, like what your vote voice kind of sounds like, so you're ready to come in? Just warming things up? Yeah, I think that's a that could be it any other theories.
It's probably like when you have to run into a double dutch thing, You're like, how am I going to do this? Right?
Yes?
Yeah?
More people are offering them different food and they're like, oh, but warming your.
Voice up is so important though, because this morning, you know, trying to sing, I did warm my voice.
Up, and I was like, yeah, my guy doesn't believe in warm ups. You just come in and.
You just go.
No.
I know, I always wore my before a gig. I always try to warm my voice up.
Yeah, a little bit, I know, you do you guys do it the free golden voice?
Oh, Anya, thanks, just like the Golden Bachelor. Actually, the Golden Bacheler does not have a golden voice at all. His voice is actually like really soft and like, I kind of don't like it at all. His voice probably creeps me out. I don't. It's like he has a permanent bubble in his throat. I don't, but he is the sweetest man, maybe alive for at least a couple more years.
I don't get to watch the whole episode. Your mom, we watched it was like date, we were watching daytime television yesterday wh Nikki came out. That's what reminded me of the pandemic. Oh yeah, I haven't watched daytime television.
I had like an hour to kill and so I stop by my parents. You guys got to watch the Golden Bachelor. We need you to watch this. And then I just filmed them watching it, and my mom is, oh god, oh look at this chick. That is so queer.
I was enjoying.
Yeah, dad loved it. Well, d I like about getting ready to sign up?
Well, no, we were just I'm part of Bachelor Nation. I don't know if you guys know that.
Yeah, he's very proud.
He was like, how do we get in card carrying?
No, when Nicky lived with us, Like I watched. I watched it and given everybody shit about you know, we're watching the Bachelor. Then all of a sudden, I was like, no, wait, now who is this and why are they doing? And I thought I think I'm part of Bachelor Nation.
Yeah, he got a citizenship during Yeah, but.
I haven't watched it since Nicky moved out.
But any what did you think about it?
I thought it was good.
I enjoyed it. I enjoyed seeing these older women, which you know, there are like thirty women that got out of the car. Weren't there? How many were there?
Yeah, but there's multiple cars.
Okay, well yes, but and then we were joking around, but I kept like Julie was saying, no, when I die, you're gonna you know. And then as these beautiful women kept getting out of the car, I'm like, when are you going to die again?
Because the whole promise of the show is that this man lost his wife seven years ago and they were they were high school sweethearts. This guy has not dated since, he's never dated.
He no, they got married when he was twenty years old.
Yeah, right out of high school. Now, so he's never dated in his life. It was the first person that ever liked him, and now he is dating at seventy two. And some of these women are trying to be like naughty. Like one woman showed her high heels and she was like, and by the way, I'm not scared of six inches, and he just like didn't even understand what that is.
He's from Indiana.
He didn't.
No one thinks he has a six inch stick, Like, I don't know, he might have his tiny penis. What does that even mean to him?
He was the one that looked like Chris Jenner who said, sounds like that. Sheboked like four packs of cigarette. I'm gonna if I get eliminated tonight, I can't.
Like, you are definitely going to be he might keep you around just to just to be nice.
One girl came pulling up on the motorcycle and she hopped off.
Oh yeah, she's the she's the front runner. Yeah yeah, but they're all like you would think the Golden Bachelor. My joke was when the Golden bacheler came out, I'm like, oh, they're doing the Golden Bachelor with like older people, so it's going to be like thirty five and up like I thought it was gonna be. I thought the most they would go it was like people in their fifties. Yeah,
you know, like they really went for it. I mean there's like people getting pretty damn close to eighty up in this ped I think the youngest person is sixty. No no wheelchairs. One woman came out with like she was like fake hobbling with a you know, a cane and a thing and then she threw it to the side, was like just kidding, and she tossed off this dress and she was right get up of course at top and stuff.
I guess they're trying to appeal to my you know, my age group, to baby boomers. But maybe young people are digging in too.
I don't know, but yeah, they definitely think they're digging in. There's a woman, Christina, who's seventy three. If you asked me how old she was, I would have said fifty.
Yeah, they look really good. I mean they all have. Okay, there's this type of eye surgery that all people got, maybe in the early two thousands. I think it's bleshoropacity, but it's an eyelid surgery, and it makes every woman's eyelids look the same, and everyone looks like Robin McGraw, doctor Phil's wife. They all look like those eyes, you know, I'm talking about the one the woman with the guitar that got the on the motorcycle has those eyes. They
all have the same. White lady I plastic surgery.
Iled it.
Yes, they all had those eyes. It's really creepy and I will have them some day too. Katie Kirk kind of has them.
When I first had HD television, I couldn't watch Katie Kirk anymore. Her eyes were just I didn't know she was an anchor. She was an anchor on CBS for a while, but.
Dad, everyone knows, Oh no, when she had the number one job. You mean I thought you were describing who Katie Kirk was.
We're not that, No, I'm talking, but she she was the.
I have a new joke on stage that I'm trying, and it kind of worked this weekend. I don't have a punchline for it yet. But it's like when old people like try to make young people feel bad about not knowing something that they weren't alive for, Like we're like growing up, mine was like you don't know happy day, you don't know the facts of life. And it was like, no, I wasn't ten in nineteen eighty two. I wouldn't know that.
Why would I know that? And now I think for gen Z it's like I'm I'm I'm self trying.
You don't know math? You know how right, you don't.
Know cursive Youah, No, it's more cultural things that old people shame young people about. But really what the shame is old people want to feel superior to young people because we know we're dying sooner and we're jealous, and we can't just admit we're jealous of the youth and that we're like angry that we're closer to death than they are. And it's like this, it's this feeling that we can't admit to ourselves about anger, about our bodies
breaking down, and there's being youthful. So we get mad at them, but we can't just say I'm mad at you because you're young, because that would be insane to say. So instead we go, you don't know who Rkle is and we try to like make them feel bad about what TGI what you don't know you've never seen the goony.
Well, some people have no idea of chronology. They forget They just think everybody everybody's their age group. They don't know.
They just need to them something that is young people not knowing yet.
They're like, you don't know Aladdin, you don't know Boy Meets World.
You watch the Degrassi Redo or whatever. Well for me, Aladdin, like I at least know, like I never saw Hercules or Moana, but I like know the gist of it, Like I wasn't a child during that time. But I feel like you. The reason I was like, you don't know anything about Aladdin is like you and Aladdin was you were still like you were may I guess you were a little bit too old to be watching kids movies. But Aladdin just feels like you should know, like at
least like the main players of it. But maybe not.
That's not like I did not watch cartoons at twenty one or whatever I was.
I can't geist. Isn't there like a Broadway meeting?
It was read Aladdin of it?
There was so much adult you know, I got, I.
Know the tale of Aladdin.
I used to subscribe to Rolling Stone magazine and they had an article like they always do, the top one hundred TV shows of all time, and Andy Griffith was not listed that, and I was like, screw, I canceled my subscription. I had nothing to do with him.
You have to some.
Of one hundred shows, Andy Griffith has got to be there. I'm sorry. Your listeners probably don't even have any clue.
Everyone knows that Andy Griffiths. Well, if you play some Sunday cross Ford Puzzle or any Crossroad New York Times Crossrod puzzles, Opie is in there zero constantly because you got three val that's true.
I am going to do like a full weekend of just watching all the things I missed because I do want to know, Like I don't know about SIMS.
I don't know about There's no movie I know, but I have to just brush up on that. You know what SIMS are, like, you know what I need to know? The game? Like you know what it is.
Yes, it's been a few decades playing that game.
SIMS to us.
On your.
Probably already, SIMS is a universe that it doesn't exist, that it's like an alternate universe with little but this is what I imagine. It is little bubbly people and they have their own language. They have their own language.
And so.
I watched other people play it like I think it was. I just didn't get. I was a little bit too old when it first came out when I was playing those games. But it's not. They're not bubbly people. They like look like real people and they do like but they just talked to I.
Confuse it with Pokemon. It's the same thing, Brian.
Did you play Sim's Little No.
I played Sim City and I played Roller Coaster Tycoon.
And right, those were around the same time.
Yeah, I played Command and Conquer and Age of Empires.
To wait, what don't you understand, Brian, I don't.
Understand why Anya feels like she needs to know the Sims.
Well, because I bet the reference recently and she didn't know what it was and someone shamed.
It's okay, I meant.
But I should know that the SIMS is a world that you don't need to know, like what the character's names are. But like, you know enough. All you know is what you know. Did someone say like you don't know what their dog's name is or something the dog's name. No, I know, but like did they did someone ask you for a fact about Sims that you were like, I need to know this?
May no, yes, who are they talking about the Sims these days?
Well, I'm just thinking someone referenced this. I'm wondering where this came from. The SIMS thing on it.
Oh, I'm sorry, I just pulled it out in my ass because it's a thing that you'll hear once in a while, like people reminiscing about their sims, their earlier life, their childhood, or that's like.
Gen Z right now is talking about when they were kids. They played a lot of SIMS. There was also like a baseball game, Like all I ask of people, if you don't know something that you lived through, just know a little bit. Like I don't. I've never seen Star Wars or Star Trek, but I know enough to like be a part of a conversation. Like when people just have no knowledge of it at all, I think that's a little crazy.
I saw Barbie the other day and I thought about Nikki because the man explaining they were like, you've never seen the Godfather. Let me tell you. I remember they're trying to to get somebody to, you know, buy some time. Let me tell you about the Godfather. Oh my god, the god you hear?
No, No, I haven't seen The Godfather, and I still haven't because I don't like violence, and I don't like movies that are really long. It's too long.
When you had an audition with Francis Ford Coppola, you think you might have wanted to see that.
I wouldn't have gotten it anyway. And then I would have just wasted more time of my life on that.
But yeah, you're right.
I think he appreciated my honesty that I had.
You told him that, I don't.
I think I told I told him I didn't know what Hamlet was to be very confused by that.
That's a really old generation.
He said, do this, yeah, do this monologue in the style of Hamlet. And I'm like, I don't. I mean, I know that a guy is talking to a small and saying, but I don't know what that is. I don't know what he's talking about.
I am a big pantameter.
Well, I understand, like Seinfeld shirt.
What do you mean Seinfeld shirt, the big poofy shirt, puffy shirt. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, that's so true, the puffy shirt. Okay, well we figured it out. I'm glad we got there. Okay, we're gonna break. We'll be right back after this.
The only woman in America that's not seeing The Godfather Nikki Glacier.
Dad, we're back. And I don't think I'm the only woman in America who has not seeing The Godfather. I think there's many women because it is a boy the.
Series you watch it, I was I think I was like, you just do this.
That's not well, one is rad. Do you know any things I have to do? If did, if I had, if you you have like a list of things that I need to listen. I need to read Travis McGee books. I need to read Lonesome Dove. I need to read Kurt Vonnegut Slaughterhouse five. I also need to read Cat's Cradle. I need to read uh what so right now I'm at a week of stuff to do. I have to watch Charles Say Kids. Oh yeah, I need to read what's the twist? No, but there's David Copperfield. Why is
he named the same as the Magician? Why is the Magician named after that book? And do they know that?
And is it one purpose he just used that name?
I guess I don't know why.
Yeah, okay, good question. Okay, And then I need to so I have to that's about four weeks of reading.
Okay.
Then I need to watch all the Godfathers. Any other movies I need to see.
I'm not a big fan of the Godfather But your mom.
Why didn't I see Raiders of the Lost Ark? Like, why didn't you ever make us watch those? Because that's another thing that. People go, you've never seen Indiana Jones? How did we miss that?
Really?
We were raising kids in the eighties. That's what you always say when you miss a song, When I go, how do you not know this song? And you go, we were raising kid You had to you never saw it.
When I see a movie once, I don't usually watch it a second or third time. So really, yeah, I'm done with it.
Oh wait, your favorite movie The Boy? Wait, it's like a boy a boy called. What's your favorite movie?
Little Big Man, A Little Big Okay, it doesn't hold up much anymore, but I love that movie with Okay.
Well, I've got a lot to do, is what I'm saying. But we wanted to give to some topics today. Noah has some news headlines.
What Brian, I just have groundbreaking information about David Copperfield.
Oh my god, please is the Permont music for.
It breaking news about David Copperfield. The reason why he's named David Copperfield after Charles Dickens novel is because quote he liked how it sounded.
That's it.
What's his real name?
I don't know, douglch.
Thank you for that. Have you read David Copperfield anyone here read Tale Two Cities? David Copperfield.
Well, I had to read a Tale of Two Cities in high school. I mean they forced us, but it was the best of time.
Read that great expectation.
Before they made us read the Tale of Two Cities before freshman year, I had to read it. That song, Yeah, it was. It was arduous and boring.
I hate Grapes of Wrath sucked also, but oh, my dad, always I hate, Oh you know what I love. At the very end, an old man suckles at the breast of a woman. That's almost disgusting thing. Ever, Dad, would you would always talk about it was one of the most postal scenes an old man's dying, he suckles at the teet of a young woman. I'm just like this guy was jerking off and he wrote it, and he was jerking off when he wrote it.
Showed you that they were going to persevere and they were going to make it.
They could have shown that in any other way. Let them find like a river, let them find a freshly killed antelope.
The quote I remember from the Grapes of Wrath because it was so like I remember when I read it, it was like it just stuck with me, and it was it's uh, I'm just uh oh no, I forgot it now, No, I'm just bones covered in skin or something like that. It was like this guy talking about his like emptiness and his despair.
That's also your favorite band.
Did you ever hear the Bruce Springsteen song. There's a Bruce Springsteen song. It's based on that ghost of Tom Jode. Wherever there's a cop beating a guy, wherever there's a hungry baby cries when there's hate hatred in the air, Mom, I'll be there. You know. It's it's a it's a peaked paraphrases exactly John Steinbeck in that song. He actually called missus Missus Steinbeck and asked her for permission to use the imagery of Tom Joade, and she said, yeah.
Go ahead, Yeah, that's nice, that's nice. Steinbeck's great, one of the greats. He's He was such a cool guy too. He like went up, he like drove across the country in a van he built himself. He was like an alcoholic, but he also like would go on a boat and like sail to find whales on his own. And he was just a beloved guy. I read his memoir anyway, did you guys read Ragtime in high school?
Oh my god, rag Time.
They made us read Ragtime in high school. And in that book, a guy literally is jerking off in a closet watching a woman get a massage, and he's so aroused by watching this massage that he bursts out of the closet and ejaculates all over her body.
Ragtime. He didn't mean to do that.
We read that aloud.
We read that portion of the novel aloud in English class in high school.
Oh my god, that's the best day of school ever, Brian.
I bet that book is banned now at your old high school. Yeah god, what a great assignment though, you must have been.
Have you volunteered to read?
We all love it? Hereties of guys.
We used to go to Barnes and Noble and go to the in the kids section, there was a book about like what our bodies do and what what's like? You know, some kind of book about sex, and there was all these drawings of people having sex, and man, that was like, that was the best day of my life. I was such a horny weird. I wasn't even horny. I just wanted to.
See every kid. Every kid does it was so good.
We used to sit and church and a Catholic church. I mean this is fourth to fifth grade, Eddie Brown. They always had Bibles there, but Catholics never really read the Bible. But Eddie Brown had a knack. He could always get to the Old Testament and find sexy passages. And if you've ever read the Old he passed around and we'll be laughing. The nuns will come over and beat us.
Oh wow, yeah, just but do you have to beat him going through the exactly porn.
To get none to beat you?
Yeah, I mean you can you imagine having porn the way it is accessible now when you were a kid, I mean, are low. I'm even worried about like it shows up everywhere.
When I was a kid, I found a stash of porn magazines in the woods and they were all all like you like comic book pages. And it was this little camp in the woods that a bunch of bums were living in, probably, but it was the kind of porn that had black black marks over their eyes, Oh my god. And it was just women that they were all black and white and it was all it was like, and the pages were all musty. But I took these things and kept them hidden in my room and my
sister's friends. I mean there was my sisters three years olderan me. They used to come up and go like, j could you get that porn out? And I come out and show it to them because it was like, oh it was Looking back on it was probably the nastiest stuff. And I don't think the pages were stuck now, I.
Don't think it was probably the nastiest stuff. The nastiest stuff is now is now the nastiest stuff.
Kids don't care. They're just they're they're faced with it daily, I know, like it's just like a pop up, like somebody getting.
That's why this. Kids are choking each other all the time in sex and like as soon as they start making out, like if you see on f Boy Island, like which is premiering October thirteenth on the c W or sorry October sixteenth, Monday, October sixteenth, they whenever they kiss, they choke hold each other's necks. It's a it's a weird thing that even they do in public now and
it is like a hot move. I don't want to get into this because my dad's sitting right here, but it's not like a bad move, like a soft throttling. But they all do it now, and it's not something I think you ever saw in movies or TV before, but it's all now.
Before maybe it was like one finger slowly sliding up on your shrikey, I mean, just.
To check if you're a man or not poor.
There's fashion trends. Everybody's shaved now, and that was something that you know now. And I read something a few years ago. I don't know if it's true anymore.
My dad's classics I saw this one coming ago ago, has a sort of classic anecdotes and talking.
About endangered species of human crab lice. Pubic lice are endangered because there's no habitat for them anymore. Because so I have a campaign. I'm starting.
Fu say, save the crab pubic habitat. Oh god, yeah, ok, it's true.
I did read that.
It is true. Still have the asshole hair, I would think, and like taint hair. Men are still so hairy down there, right, I would guess.
I don't know.
Crickets bugs are huge in Paris.
Oh yeah, they're so chic. So if you're gonna catch bed bugs anywhere, a little bed bug with a Bereton. Yeah, I think, yeah, I heard that. I would be scared to go to Paris right now. They're in all the hotels. But but bed bugs get such a bad rap for like, if you have them, then you're disgusting and you're dirty and you like live in slums and you you probably don't take care of yourself. But rich people get them, like anyone can get them. But it's it's such a
shameful thing. And I wish people didn't feel that shame about them, because then that's when they lie and they say they don't have them, and then they spread.
Is it really true?
Paris has not break and they're kind of worrying about the Olympics. It's like the mont and with moms, are you serious you're going there? Be careful. They're in every hotel like all the hotels.
Hotels.
Oh you aren't.
We're staying in an apartment.
Okay, we'll just watch out, bag up your stuff. Well, I'll say my final goodbye is we're not hanging out anymore. I am so.
Terrified of you got to get the bed bug spray and then spray around your open suitcase so that they can't get in a.
Thing.
I mean I had bedbugs back in the Sunnyside Queens when I lived there, and I learned all the techniques.
Oh, Brian, I can only imagine you with bed bugs. How yeah, did you probably still have PTSD from that? I?
Yeah, I think I got them from my office that I worked at the one time I worked in an actual office, and because I saw a bedbug crawling on my desk one day while I was typing out my computer and I was like, what is that thing?
I think that might be a bedbug?
And I captured it on a piece of clear tape, like packing tape, and like like like a biologist, like had it between two pieces of tape so I could take it to someone and say, like, is that a bed bug?
And they confirmed that it is a bed bug?
Yeah.
They they live in out electronics in wood in the walls. Like it's not just.
Your it's a nightmare.
Let's say treats the subject. Okay, no, get let's tell us tell us the news headline.
Okay, Well everyone, if you subscribe to TikTok Trends, you might be able to read more like EJ recommended, because monk mode is popping off sh and is encouraging people to keep off of social media. Month mode means cutting out all distractions from your life. Huh, So you can dedicate yourself to a particular task. But the idea being that you massively boost your productivity.
So how are people even finding They find out about it and then they instantly go into monk mode, and then because how could this be?
That's the iron wouldn't hear about? They discover it on TikTok. But it's supposed to encourage people to also like a side effect of it is changing their diet, cutting out sex and cutting down on the number of times they go out out.
Is this a feature? Like you can turn it on on TikTok? Now I think you've been.
Saying I'm going into Monk model just a hashtag how much are you? Like, I'm not. We talked about this extensively on the show through the years, But like, what's my phone uses off? Like I can't really tell what it is when I check my apps to say, like how long? It's always says I've been on like sixteen hours throughout the day because I have my white noise machine going all night long on my phone and so it's activated and so I can't get a good reading
of like what I'm actually doing. But I would say I'm not. I'm not spending a ton of time scrolling. I've heard people on I would like to check mom's usage. I think that would be insane. But I think i'm pretty I'm pretty good about it. I think that there are a lot of things in my life that I overdo in terms of work and sometimes sleeping too much and eating too much. But on my phone, I think I have a pretty good like I know, I'm someone I'm almost like like the people i'm jealous of who
can just have two drinks. I'm like that with my phone. I don't need I don't need to be on TikTok for three hours. I don't even have TikTok on my phone because I want to prevent that. But I'm pretty good at being like, Okay.
I'm Reddit scroller.
Yeah, but Reddit for me is information and it's reading about I'm not looking at just people's lives and like, oh now they're doing Oh look at that happy family, Look at that girl that just got engaged. Like I'm not just seeing mindless images. I'm reading about people's experiences. I'm reading I'm reading a lot on it.
I love Reddit too, but I think I follow too many categories because there's too many disparate things coming up. Yeah, but I love it when Yeah, I learned a lot from from Reddit.
I do too. I think it's a it's it's it's good for my brain, I don't. I love it.
And whenever there's like I watch the evening news every night. Probably most people don't, but I love watching news and I'm always like I saw that three days ago and Reddit and all they're doing on these news shows is pulling things off a red.
Yes, the first place to go anymore place for news, Like five years ago, most news it was it was peak Twitter, and most news was just like reporting on things that people have tweeted.
You remember that, Yes, and then this person said on Twitter, and then this senator responded on Twitter with this tweet, and it was just them repeating and reading out what that was it. That's that's luckily died down a little bit since Elon Musk took a blow torch to Twitter. But it was like five years ago the news.
Are there apps that you guys wish you stayed off
of more? Are there any apps that have you guys kind of like, Okay, I should go into monk mode on this, because for me, I think Instagram is just the one that sometimes I'll get a little bit sucked into and I'll just see one or two posts that bummed me out and make me, you know, just people, because I follow comedians who are doing the same thing I'm doing, doing theater shows, and they're selling out shows, and they're posting when they sell out shows, and they're
posting pictures of the audience, and they they start to worry me that I'm not. Oh I went to that theater. I didn't sell out that theater. Oh person selling out the theater. Oh they have a one point one million followers. God, how do I get that one point one I used It took me so long to get to one, and I've been at one now for like almost a year. Oh that I took a year to get an extra hundred thousand. I'm not having enough with growth. Oh that
girl's hair looks really thick. Oh that girl, Oh my god, I can't believe her butt just like slopes like that off of her back. I have a stiff back from pilates, Like, you know, all the same things that we all get frustrated about. I sometimes find myself falling into that.
But you gotta just start lying, Nikki.
You just now it's the picture of your audience in theater and be like sold out show at wherever you are, and then I've talked about it.
I do that because no one checks, no one facts checks things unless you were at the show. And most people at shows don't even know if it's sold out, sold out or not. They just assume it is because even a sold out show has a lot of empty seats. In fact, why don't I promote my tour right now? Upcoming dates? This Friday, I'm in Mystic Lake Casino in outside of Minneapolis, Minnesota. I don't know Prior Lake, Minnesota,
I think is the name of the city. And then I'm in Calgary on Saturday night, so any will be there with me on Friday. And then on Saturday I'm I have my friend John Colin opening up in Calgary. And then next week was going to be Napa, but now it's just a casino outside of Sacramento in Wheatland, California. Forget the name of the casino though. Sorry I'm all that, But if you're in a Sacramento Areah, No, it's hard rock line, that's right, And my dad will be opening
on that one. I'll be singing a song together to open and close the show. An you will also be there, and then I have you know, San Francisco. We have two dates in Denver coming up December thirtieth that I would really like Busties to be at. So there's tons of dates Niki Glazer dot com for tickets. All right, So wait, so did you answer?
What?
What apps would you like to stay off of your phone? Is there any bad habits going on over there? Anya? Your word game Instagram? I mean, I don't what word games. I love that.
I don't feel guilty about that at all, or I don't feel bad about that. I wish I could spend more time doing that.
Do you do Wordle?
Yeah?
Yes, I love Wordle and I do Wirdle, and then I do Octurtle.
Those are all Pokemon so fun.
That's what you do.
Know.
I'm on three stages YEA.
The test of whether or not you're on your phone too much is can you watch a movie in a movie theater or on your TV without looking at your phone? Because I do that all the time. And I feel it's like that's a change.
Here's here's what I'll say to that. Though. Sometimes movies are fucking boring and they're a waste of your time. And the fact that i want to look at my phone is not because I'm just like I can't stay off my phone. It's because this movie does not respect me and it's over indulgent. I would like to but I'm there with Chris watching Oppenheimer, and sometimes I just want to check the open timer to see how much
longer I have to watch fucking thing. No open Iro was actually good and I really enjoyed going to see that. But you know, I'm on my phone football. I'm on my phone for I'm telling you football. Okay, you can come in and out for that.
Oh yeah, absolutely, everyone's on their phone for football. They're checking their fantasy scorers, they're checking their bets, they're checking the other the other scores of the other team.
Right, Okay, I I yesterday I was I had a really good football moment. There was a oh fuck, now, I can't think of the word. I'm like having the Noah moment. But Noah, you came up with the grapes of wrath. Quote, I got it. Uh uh, he was. It's what happens when the when the when the quarterback gets rushed before he's able to throw the football.
He sacked pressureed.
I called, I called a sack. I go, he just got sacked. And I was like, Chris, was that a sack? He was like, it was a sack.
And I was like, that was last night you were watching I think.
Maybe two nights ago there was a sack. There was like actually four sacks. I think the Jets had like a lot of worse ACKed a lot or some.
Last night they almost broke a record.
For that's what it was.
It was so many seconds last it was ten sacks. Eleven was the record they almost got there. Daniel Jones looked pathetic back there giants or shambles.
So what are you doing, Brian, don't talk to like this isn't a football podcast. But I was just kidding. No, I appreciate, but basically, yeah, I was able to and a punt. I'm going to figure out what a punt looks like as opposed to just like a kick.
So it's past weekend.
The NFL did a special event where they took the uh Saturday morning game which took place in London. Every year they send some games to London to like try to spread international sport, and they took that game, which was on a nine to thirty in the morning here, I guess it was seven thirty in the morning for you for you guys, six thirty in the morning here, seven thirty for years, really early, and they made it
a toy story AI. The characters on the field looked like toy story characters, and they made it like a three D generated toy story game in real commentators were everybody everybody.
So kids could watch it and think it was cartoons or something.
Yeah, you could learn, yeah, but what they did and I texted Nikki this, they were the announcers were explaining the game as if you were a kid and you had never seen football before. So I've in teaching you how to play football and what all the rules meant and breaking it down really simply using cartoons during the whole game.
And I was like, you should watch this, Nikki.
When you sent me that, I was so excited. I was like, oh my god, discreet and I showed. I told Chris and he goes, ugh. He was so grossed out because he hates the NFL, and he's like, they're trying any marketing to children in that way is is kind of gross. It is kind of I mean.
But use audience.
Yeah they're smart. Well, you were a marketer in sales, but don't you think that people in sales and marketing are kind of they're they're they're preying on people's jumpness and uh, what's it called susceptibility? Minute, Yeah, they saw you coming. I told Chris the other day that whenever my parents see like a purchase I got, they go it looks like they saw you coming. He was like, that's the meanest thing you can say to someone. I'm like, is it?
Oh?
I think I said it to him jokingly and he was like, that's really mean. I was like, my parents say that to me about everything. They must have seen you coming.
Reminded me. There used to be a store called Hits or missus Hit or miss hit or miss for clothing, and.
Your mom used to go to.
Your mom used to come home with clothes. I'm like, you missed again.
Or mom?
All right, Well, we got to go to break but we will come back and have a little story time with you. J Glazer. All right, we're back. So I thought it'd be a good idea because we have you here to document, like a good story. Like I was thinking about buying you this thing where you just get interviewed at a radio station and then they have all your stories on tapes for future ter generations to hear.
And then I thought, well, I have my own thing, so and you have really good stories, and you're not always going to be here, so I was thinking to have something for future inter generations and just for us to enjoy while you're here, Like, tell one of your stories so it's always cemented and we won't have to just kind of try to remember it in the future, for like Rolo and Poppy. And it's just a good story in general. So sorry to base it around your mortality, but it's kind of the infinensula.
Okay, I'll tell a story. This is nineteen seventy two with spring break. I was in high school and I didn't yeah, we did. I wanted to go to Florida for high school break and when those days you just hitchhiked everywhere. So a buddy of mine and I we both were gonna get a hitchhike to Fort Lauderdale, Actually, we're gonna go into Cocoa Beach because his brother had a place there, and we each had forty bucks in our pocket, and we're gonna go down there for like
five six days. And so we hitchhiked from Cincinnati, Ohio, and we made it to Richmond, Kentucky. And we both had hair down on our shoulders, real long hair.
So you're eighteen, I'm eighteen.
No, I was only seventeen at the time, Okay, And I'll get to that later. I'll try to. This is a pretty long story, but i'll make it more succinct. So we got picked up for hitchhiking, and subsequently, I read in nineteen seventy two, Richard Nixon made a decree to the federal government to stop hitchhiking because they thought drugs were being transferred around the country by hitchhiking. Because I hitchhiked when I was a kid. We hitchhiked to
Martha's Vineyard, we hitchhiked to Chicago. We hitchiked all over the country, and there were people out there all over, guys and girls together hitchhiking.
Yeah.
I'm reading this book called by Pamela Dubar about being a groupie in the sixties and seventies. Do you know about her? She was like the quit essential groovy. She slept with McJagger and the one guy from led Zeppelin, the guitar player, everyone, And she wrote this book. And the whole thing is hitchhiking all the time. I can't believe women weren't murdered. It was murdering not around back then when did come.
Out occasionally, okay, but hitchhiking though. You see at what you see a Cadillaca and you come kind of like, you know, because the Cadillac was full of older people, so you kind of just give it a little bit. But you see a Volkswagen, you go like look him in the eye and like, because Volkswagen, if you saw a Volkswagen, it was a done deal that'd stopped, especially Volkswagen Bus or a SOB. In those days of SOB, you knew it was a ride. It's like, but you
had to look him in the eye. But anyway, so we were hitchhiking Richmond, Kentucky, got picked up by the cops and they picked up some guys from Detroit right in front of us, and they had real long hair too, and we didn't see them, but they were in the car when the cops picked us up. They arrested us, took us to a jail. It was kind of like Mayberry on Andy Griffiths Show, just like, so it's all back.
We so we never heard we had.
Some drugs with us. We had we had some joints and so it was in a little ring box.
J don't you admit that you sit on the podcast joint See a.
Couple of pills too. But anyway, so they.
Put us, Wait, what kind of pills like kueludes? No, it's something like what were you popping back then?
Was this is called MDA? It's probably the same thing.
Oh so like maybe it's yeah, so ecstasy.
I guess that's what they call it now.
Oh wow, okay, we used to call.
It my MDA, my darling amphetamine. Oh anyway, so I didn't I didn't do it that much, but we had it with us. We were to do it down there was all exciting. So anyway, my buddy he had it with him. So we're sitting on this cot. It was a cot and this pre Civil war prison slash city
hall facility. So I'm sitting there. He passes over to me, and they they bring him in the other room and they're frisking him and they frisk him down, and then he comes back in and they say, yeah, he asked me to go, So I passed it back over to him. And I get in that room and they're frisking me and my legs and I never forget the cup. He was patting me down my legs. He goes a little bit nervous there, Hunt, Slim, because my my legs were shaken.
Slim back.
Remember when you were a waiter and you dropped up some My dad was waiting waiting tables one night when he was like sixteen or something, and it was his first night waiting tables and he was so like overwhelmed. He had too many tables and he brought us soup over to the sky and a drop little sweat went into the soup. You're slipping, Slim.
If he didn't see it, I was to leave it there, but he looked me in the eye. He saw it. He said, you're slipping, Slim.
Okay, soar too.
Like my mom dated a guy named Slim before she married my dad. Slim was right big term. So anyway, so they put us in jail. And we got in jail and I was under seven, under eighteen, so I was in the under eighteen jail and my buddy was in the over eighteen jail because he was older than me. And as soon as we get into jail, he goes, I'm in there with these guys. One guy had a boet hole in his stomach and he was just sitting there, going, oh, just laying there. He was shot robbing a liquor store.
And there was a women's prison right above us. Oh whoa, And there was a and we were there was this little walkway with cells over to the side, and it was pre Civil war prison. It's gone now because I googled it about ten years ago. But anyway, as soon as I got in there, there's a toilet with plumbing going up and there's holes in the ceiling. And this guy came out of nowhere. He's standing on the on the toilet and he's yelling up there's a hole in
the ceiling. He's going like, hey, girls, come on down and so and then so the girls are squatting on this hole and these guys were finger fingering the girls. God, and this is my first exposure. I'm like, oh my god, and he's this guy turned around and said Monas. He said, bring bring me mona. He says Monas. And one has got the mole wan er ass and so and so. Then meanwhile, all of a sudden, we start smelling marijuana smoke,
and my buddy is over in the cell. If I leaned over and all the way I could see his eye, he could see my eye, and he's smoking a joint with some big, fat guy. And this fat guy he said, look at my buddy. And the guy had a if you know the comic strip Little Abner Daisy from Little Abner, he had it on his back and they had a tattoo of daisy. I'll never forget. But the king, the kingpin of my jail cell, this guy that had been in there seventy four days. He was like, you got
your buddy's got drugs. Your buddy's got marijuana.
I was like, Jerry, you gotta flush it down, get rid of that.
So he got rid of it. But anyway, so we were in there overnight, bed bugs biting me all night in.
And get out of here.
And the guy and my cell his wife was up above us, and there was a little hole in a pipe, and so all night he was talking to her and going with his lips around the hole. So I couldn't understand what he was saying, but he was having this conversation, so he kept me awake all night. The next day they put us in front of a judge and it was just like a judge you'd see from some old movie about the old South. And this guy was a
Kentucky judge from from way back when. But he saw our long hair and we were all all four of us, the guys from Detroit, my bud and I were all put in front of him, and he said thirty dollars fine plus a haircutter thirty days. And he put a gabble down and I was like, sir, I need my long hair cut. I'm in a rock and roll band a time make a living. Wasn't true at the time, but I said, I was trying to appeal to a sense of capitalism. I need my long hair to make
a living. And he said thirty dollars fine plus a haircutter thirty days. So my buddy and I, I said, I'm not going to get my haircut. So they marched us back to the prison. What the two guys from Detroit. They said they took the haircut. And so on the way back to the prison, I said to the guy that was marched his back, I said, we haven't made a phone call yet. You got to let us make a phone call. And so my buddy, his father was
a dentist, and we called doctor Lotman. He called doctor Lotman and said, you know they're trying to get us to cut our hair. We have thirty dollars fine. So his dad was going to drive down to help us out. Meanwhile, they marched us back into prison. And the guy that was the turnkey with that's what they call him. The guy had all the key. He was a trustee, but he had on bib overalls. He was a Kentucky hillbilly and uh, he's he's He marched me back into prison.
They gave us a round of applause when they found out that we wouldn't get our haircut. Wow, heroes of the jail. So but the guy that was the kingpin in my jail cell, when this guy named Roy put us in and the guy said Roy and wrote Roy said to him, he said, you know if I was if I was your edge, I'd get my haircut in a minute to get out of this prison. And the guys, the guy in my jail cell said, Roy, if you were our age, you'd have your hair so long hit have to part it in the middle. Take a shit.
I'll never forget that one.
Wow.
But then but then anyway, so that from this prison cell you could stand on a bench and see the town square. And then one guy was given a play by play, going like, they're going the guys Detroit, they're going in, They're going in, They're going in the barbershop. And so everybody's waiting in hesitation. And there were girlfriends out there talking to these guys in jail. The windows were open, and uh, then the guy said, they're coming out.
They're coming. They got burrs, they got burr haircuts, and so everybody's going you got in those days, if you had a.
Burr haircut, it was a kiss at death.
You weren't going to get laid you were you know, really it was that bad.
You know, you were like a Vietnam you were at war or something in the military.
Whoa.
So anyway, but burrs meaning shave.
Everything shaved, just shaved, yeah, just all the way down.
Yeah.
And so I always said that, you know, my buddy and I sos his doctor Lotman came and got us out, and well, we had to be paid a thirty dollars fine, we didn't have to get a haircut, and so, but we didn't have any money, so we didn't make it to Florida. But I always said, like, you know, those guys might have made it to Florida, but they never got laid because they had haircut.
Wait, so you didn't have to say thirty days, thank god? No, no, no, okay, final thought that's why. But you were prepared to give up to do thirty days in that place over getting your hair cut. I think I would shave my head to avoid thirty three days.
In the present, I think, I guess I.
Knew we didn't make a phone call, and I thought that they can't make us cut our hair.
I've heard that that phone call thing is actually not even real, like you're not entitled to a phone call. Like if you're arrested now and you're like, oh I need my phone call, they'll be like, no, you, that's like a thing in movies.
I wrote a paper though, in Civics class for that senior year, and then The title was give me hair or give me death.
I got that.
How much would it cost you, Noah and Anya to do a burr? To do a shave your head? How much money?
I mean?
Okay, let me just if it means I get out of jail.
Thousand dollars thousand right now to shave your Okay, one hundred thousand dollars cash, shave your head. It's not as valuable anymore.
It's inflation and stuff.
No, not to ask straight up cash, no questions asked. You always have to pay a tax. No, not in this case, it's coming straight to you.
So you'll get you'll one hundred and you get one hundred and fifty thousand dollars.
Okay, So yeah, if you want to factor in tax, it will be one hundred and fifty thousand dollars and then you'll end up with take a three hundred. No, so you wouldn't do it for a hundred. You're passing it up.
I think I'm passing it up.
So isn't that interesting? But what about two hundred? Because there is there is a price where it would come down to a cent where you would do it, and then a cent where you wouldn't do it. Isn't that weird about things?
Yeah?
Do you know what I'm saying? Like there's a sign where you say the time makeup? There is? It comes down to a cent difference of the yes and no.
Which is interest.
Wait, what did you say you could just amp up the makeup or wear away so.
One hundred grand you would not do it?
One hundred cred I would do it.
I would do it.
Do it.
Yeah, I'll do it because.
That'll be a great story to tell. Okay, I got one hundred grand, but my head shaved a big deal, will grow back in a few.
Yeah, I'm looking for any excuse to do it. It would be so fun and I would have regretted instantly, and I would cry so much because I have dreams a lot about shaving my head or like getting my hair caught in something where.
What's holding you back?
So societal acceptance, hosting shows, being invited on TV shows like you just people don't want to see a short woe with a shaved head. I mean, that's why Shinad O'Connor was so bad ass. Do you know that she did well, that's really nice. I'm sure she didn't end up killing herself because of comments like that. Do you know that she shaved her head before you ever even knew she was famous. She did it the second someone from the record company said, were we need you to,
we need you to What did they say? They wanted her to like dress a certain ways. They just were like, you should be wearing skirts, and she not only did not wear skirts, but she said, you're gonna, I see where this is going, I'm shaving my head. She right away just shaved her head without any hesitation, and she never looked back because she never wanted anyone to weigh in on what she was doing or to dismiss her because she was a woman or like like her just because she had long hair.
She became more famous because she didn't have a shaved head though, you know.
Really, yeah, she hated fame too. She thought it was disgusting. And she's just the coolest ever, but definitely struggled with uh, mental illness more than anyone I've ever heard, and from you know, talking about reading people's biographies and stuff like that, she was very clear about, like, my life is haunted by mental illness because she got beat so bad when she was young that it explains all of it, but she also and Prince. You guys got to read her
What Prince did to her? It's in I think they'd printed what the the you know, the excerpt from her book Prince I will always hate because of what he did? Is Shenead O'Connor. He invited her to his house in the middle of like he sent a car for her. He called her and was like, I'm sending a car for you because she had already done Nothing Compares to You, which is a Prince song, and he said I want to meet you. She's like, of course, I can't wait to meet Prince. And she gets there and so you
don't have I'll just tell you what happens. She gets there and the driver won't talk to her, say anything. It's really dark. They pull in, it's completely dark house, and he leads her. He's like lurch. He leads her to the kitchen and she's like, where's prints And she's just like he's She's waiting there for like twenty minutes. It honestly reminds me of when I met to Charlie Sheen.
We were just led into his house and then we just were abandoned, and they were like Charlie's upstairs, he'll be down and we were just like, what the story for another time? But she waits and waits. Finally she starts getting like bored, and she starts like just like looking at like what kind of dishes does he have. She's like looking for a cup of water or something.
And then he appears out of nowhere, like behind her, and she he spooks her, and then he he says, I don't like how much you've been cussing, because he had just been going through this religious revival where he had found the Lord, and so he's like, I don't like the way you conduct yourself to interviews, and she goes, uh,
fuck you. She literally said something like I'll fucking do whatever I fucking want to do, and he was fuming mad, and so then he I think at that point he uh he offered her a glass of water, but he slammed the glass down with such anger that it like almost broke, and then he so he was already and she was like, she said she clocked it right then and there, that this is a violet man because she had dealt with so much violence growing up. She was like, my life is in danger right now. Truly felt it.
So she was like, I just have to get out of here, and I have to survive this because I'm so scared. So then he disappears again, and then he shows up and his butler is like shaking, he's slipping slim, he's shaking in fear. He brings soup. He brings soup over to Prince and she doesn't want soup. She has like an eating disorder, so she's like, I don't want soup. I already ate and he's like, you will eat the soup, and she goes, I'm not fucking eating your soup, and
he's furious about that, and so then he starts. So then he goes. He realizes he's not kind of like gonna win with these kind of maneuvers with her, all these mind games he's playing with her in this dark, weird house and she has no idea why she's there. He's just scolding her about cussing on TV. He's mad at her. So then he disappears and he comes back and he is like, hands a pillow and he goes, let's have a pillow fight. And she's like, okay, well maybe we can do this. As soon as she gets
hit by his pillow. It has something very hard inside it, and she realizes that he's put like like an alarm clock or something in the pillow and he's chasing around with it. And so then she realizes that she is like in danger, so she runs out the door to run away. She runs into the woods to it. She she first tries to wake up the guy and that's sleeping in the car, but she can't get him to wake and she has no idea where she is or how she got there because they called for a car
and just showed up at her house. She has no idea where she is, so she runs into the woods. He then gets prince, gets into his car and starts chasing her in the woods and like taking his high beams and putting them through the woods to find her and then screaming like I know you're in there, and she's hiding in the woods in the middle of the night. Then it's a horror film. Oh, total horror film. And this is not I mean, this is her account. You
can breathe this. Then she oh, I believe she Finally he finally thinks that she's run somewhere else, so he drives off and then she takes off in the woods, ends on the one oh one highway, walking down the highway looking for anyone to pick her up, trying to hitchhike, can't get a ride. Then she then all of a sudden, she's trying to hitchhike, and she realizes it's Prince's car. He then parks his car on the one oh one, gets out and starts chasing her down the highway and
chasing her around. She finally escapes by running up to a house and banging on the doors for for help, and the lights go on and he takes off in his car, never to return again. But then she she the people didn't come to the door and she had to walk home like five miles from the valley where he took her. He's a fucking psycho.
I am so glad you shared this story.
What people need to read it because I really missed of some of like just setting the tone for how creepy this all was. Just to be I read her whole Bible's Advocate.
People who are close to Prince say that her story is a fabrication of a mentally ill person. Well this is not nice, of course, that's for attention.
Yeah, I. Of course they're going to say that based on what I read of hers. You know, I'm I'm obviously I'm more apt to believe so mentally ill woman than I am. Like a super famous little guy that has a Napoleon complex and obviously had a lot of abuse in his childhood too, so I have some empathy
for him. But the way that I read this story the first time I read it in Rolling Stone, I think there was an excerpt, and then I read it a couple months ago in her book, it struck me as a very true story with details that weren't that were crazy, but not so crazy that it wouldn't have happened.
And also she has absolutely nothing to gain from that.
No, I'm telling that.
No, she did it, and she waited, She waited decades to write that.
And she said that song she was like, people are like, how do you feel about that song being from this guy that attacked you? And she goes, that song was always mine. She was like, I made that song. That song was written by him, but that song was mine. It was always mine. I made that song and I kind of knew that. So good. Yeah, I love her, So anyway, we don't tell my.
Answer two hundred thousand dollars to shave my head as Noman.
Yeah, okay, we did it, all right.
Everybody start a collection for.
The crab lights and for Anya to shake her hat, which they anywhere to exist. All right, guys, thank you so much for listening. Have a great weekend. We'll see you in Minnesota and Calgary this week. That's this weekend. I can't believe it. It's happening so soon. See you there, besties. Thayk you for listening to the podcast. And just keep your hair long, give your hair, give you death.
Watch out for bears.