#333 Give Them A Story!

The nick A Gliser Podcast. Oh, nik Klaser, here's Nikki. Hello here, I am welcome to the show. It's the Nicki.

Glazer Podcast with me today.

Noah is in Arizona. Anya's in New York City.

Brian Frangie, our new permanent sidekick, is in Los Angeles.

How's it going everyone?

I'm not crying today?

What when did you cry?

Remember Saturday on tour? I just went for an hour Saturday on tour.

You cried?

We were driving.

I was blacking this out.

Remember, I was like, I made a list of my anxieties and I ate.

Yeah, that was during the drive. I was thinking Saturday, like during the show. Yeah, during Saturday on tour, which we're on tour right now. We're in Tucson. Next weekend in Vegas and then a lot of European cities. I added up ten cities in fourteen days. But on we were this weekend. We were in Bethlehem, Pennsylvania on Friday, great show and then two shows in New Hampshire on

And in the morning, how did we even get on the subject.

I mean, we were just pulling out of town and all of a sudden, Anya, oh, because on you couldn't sleep. You couldn't sleep the night before, we got terrible sleep because we had a wake up so early to drive.

And you know, I was like, I just had a list of anxieties for four hours in the middle of the night.

But you made a list.

Do you find that helpful when you are Why is that helpful to make a list for you? Because I was guessing that's a tool you used to get out of anxiety.

It was the last ditch effort because I was like, you gotta stop, Like, if you cannot sleep and none of this meditation or breathing is working, just make a list so you can get it out right. And then my theory was, I bet it's like four things that I'm just recycling over and over. It wasn't It was like twenty seven yeah, so long. I was like scared I will have or get COVID and never be able to tour Europe or get married.

Do you think about making an appointment to worry where you write down your list and you say I'm gonna worry about these at ten fifteen am tomorrow morning.

That's interesting.

That's because it doesn't let you off the hook of like never worrying, because when you kind of put things, when you go just don't think about it, you're like, well, I'm gonna have to get to this at some point, Like this requires but giving yourself a total break from it knowing you will get to it.

I wish I could do that, but it feels like my obsession is too strong. It's like the Hulk. It's like ha ha. You think you can tell a little tool will work against.

I mean, twenty seven is a lot I can't imagine.

Well, you can't control your thoughts and everyone knows that, like I hope at this point, there's no free will, so they're just coming in.

You can't really help them.

But there are things you can do that Brian's thing.

Well, because I think the thoughts are like a stream. You can kind of like damn them up and you can direct them in different ways and like steer them by doing devices like that.

But you can't just help all slow.

All self help things is just you have all these things that you can do and then they take up all your day and then they don't help at all, but you do that.

You do help doing all day doing it because you're worried.

Total.

I spend all my days stretching and breathing, and I feel like, oh yeah, you stretching do I have to do?

Making my bed does not improve anything for me. It's just I have a nice looking bed, but still my life is in shambles.

I can't get back into bed, yeah, because it's so tight.

My therapist recently, and we'll get to your my surpist recently told me that she was like, what do you what do you want to do when you feel anxiety? And I go, I want to curl up in a ball, like I want to lay I want to lay down on my stomach and like put my hands underneath my like I want to feel a lot intense pressure.

I want to be pressurized and.

Like gravity blanket.

Yeah, so like gravity blankets. I never liked, but I kind of do. I get it because I'm trying to do that by laying on my stomach. That's why I lay in my stomach. I want to feel like I'm being squished. Yeah, oh I would love that, but she said she goes do it. You know, I think most therapists would go, don't go to your room and lay in the dark and try to fall asleep when you're feeling anxiety. But she's like, do it if it works, that's a soothing thing.

You used to get migraine headaches all the time, and you would like your.

Head I take it out. Yeah. Actually, those guys.

Put in are too similar.

Uti has definitely got added into my vagina after the there's only room for one you thing and three lettered thing in my.

Puss at a time.

Yeah, but I used to get Yeah, my IUD caused me great migraines and it was so it was the worst thing in my life. And then Chris would have to take my head and put it into his vice like grip and just push it together. And he was so scared that my head was going to snap like a candle ope, and I go, yes.

Please do that.

I would love for my head to my skull to break, because that would feel better and it would relieve the tension, you know, like you just want to break up the tension. Yeah, I mean, so your anxiety list didn't help.

Yeah, because I went to sleep afterwards, but I was I was sort of shocked, like, fuck, dude, this is a lot to worry about. Like this is actually real.

You know how they say read a book to fall asleep, like yours. You wrote a book that'll make you fall asleep pretty fast. There was this old lady who used to or me.

He was an old man that they didn't interview on because he was one hundred and fifteen years old and he was still cutting hair. He was a barber, and they asked him what's the secret to your longevity? And he said, I don't worry about anything.

Yeah. Stress when it was like one hundred and ten, Remember they did that video with all the older people Like she was like, the secret to life is just be happy every day, every damn happy. She's like everyone in life was dead.

The secret to a long life is to just keep living for many years not worrying.

I mean, stress is it? You know?

Once you look at We talked about that uh doctor Sarno book, The Healing Back Pain that completely transformed your back pain, right, Brian, and you you talked.

To all paint what I had, all chronic pelvic pain I had. It's not even just back pain. Yeah, it's all pains.

And it was all in your head, right, Well, not in a way that it was an to say, yeah, and that's why people don't like all in your head. But it shouldn't be condescending. It's not.

It doesn't mean that you're causing it. If it's in your head again, you're are not your fault. So it's still something that people can feel sorry for you because it's actual pain. But it is not because there's a like a physic a torsion, and you're groin the.

Check for there was no torsion. That meansion is when your testicles wrap around each other and start stuffocating.

Each other closer.

Oh my god.

Yeah, if you put a rubber band around your finger for long enough, it'll turn blue and it'll just fall off. Yes, all right, everybody is that it?

It'll just fall off?

Got do it?

Just I saw a tribe that cuts off I saw a thing on it Reddit and there's a tribe that like cuts off men's fingers to test their strength and if they WinCE, they keep getting their fingers cut until they're not wincing anymore. And there's this one guy with like he's just like they got to they were off his toes.

Yeah, you have to see the banshees of inn Is Sharon.

No, I don't.

I don't think I need to see it. If it's on that note, I don't want to see that happen.

It's just such a good metaphor it. I'm curious what you think it's about. It is such a simple story, but it's like so crazy to watch. Can I just tell you a tiny bit of what it's about?

Sure?

Yeah, spoiler alert for thee of Irishian and that no one's saw and no one will see.

It was nominated for an Oscar. It's one of the best comes. So Colin Farrell is a very simple man and he's best friends with this guy who's like a crank, a curmudgeon, and he comes by his house every day and they hang out every day in this tiny town where there's one bar. And one day he comes over. He's like hey, and the guy's like, I don't want to hang out, like he doesn't want to talk to him, and Colin Farrell is just very simple. Why don't you want to talk. I'm the nicest guy in town. Let's

Yeah, I like the crank. I'm a crank.

So as anyone ever told you I don't want to hang out with you anymore?

Have we ever? Has anyone here ever had a friend out of the blue just kind of cut things off and with under the guise of like, I don't like you any like I don't.

It would be pretty bold for someone to come out and straight up say I don't want to hang out with you.

Well, you can infer that, but I guess, I guess no matter what we've we were lied to. If this happened to us, and it's whether or not you saw through the lie. But most of the time a friend cuts you off, it is because they just don't like you anymore.

Oh yeah, yeah, I've had to do it.

You've had to cut people off before? Yeah, oh yeah, you go straight up to them and you say we're done.

No, well, I have had to do that before.

I've had a girl that was pretty persistent afterwards, and I had to ultimately say it was right around the time I quit drinking, so I had a good excuse of, like, I just don't drink anymore. That was kind of our thing and I don't have we don't have that in common, and I just needed And she would talk really loud in public spaces anytime we'd be out to eat. I would be very embarrassed, and I'd try to like whisper to kind of like do you know what to do?

So imagine you're seeing someone in the corner you want to shit talk about them, and she's like.

That one over there, Yes, good shit talk. And I don't mind listen.

I don't mind getting a little loud when I know people are kind of entertained by eavesdropping on my conversation. I won't be super loud, but I can tell when people are kind of like this is a fun like in an uber. If I'm talking about something, If I'm like, gossip about some celebrity I know dirt on, and I know this person probably knows that celebrity too, I will get louder. I did this recently on a girl's trip.

We had a I was just.

Come in, yeah, and I was mouthing off about a celebrity that I know some dirt on. I know a lot of shit on. I was shit talking literally, and I'll tell you later. Brian and and I could tell everyone was kind of like we should and I'm like, no, let it out. I want to get this out because anyone he tells Nicki Glazer was saying this about this person, I can always deny it, you know, like I'll just fucking deny I said it, you know. But also I was reading things I found on Reddit about this person

I love that. I love giving people a story to tell. I used to do that. Yes, walking through the streets of New York, you always walk past so many strangers, and a game I used to play was called give them a Story. I didn't call it that, but NI

Yes, you end up in a John mullaney joke, Like John Lady has so many jokes where he's.

Like eat ass, sell drugs.

Educt Like there's always like a weird person saying something. I realized this this week and we were listening to John Mulaney in the car, which is great inspiration. Like, I forget how much how good it is for me to listen to comedians I love because it's just their style. I absorb some of their things that I like about them, and then thus I become better by using some of the things that I already gravitate towards. Naturally, I'm not doing it because I'm like people like John Laney. I'll

We all know it. But the way that he talks and the way he'll change his the dynamics of his voice to emphasize things is very is a lot of what makes him so enjoyable. And I go, well, I can do that, like I'm just talking like a normal person. I sometimes have fun with going like but I was doing it a lot more this weekend and it was so much fun, and it really like colored in. It's like having a coloring book and you're like, oh, those are good drawings, and then you color it in with

They're just tools in your tool belt. I mean, yeah, that's why I started smashing watermelons on stage.

Because well, I'm finding myself to be a little sexist here, because I do hate when female comics do this mugging after a joke that I've made compilations of, Like I've been so bored with my life and so annoyed by some trends in comedy that I've literally made, Like.

What is it?

It's okay?

Oh They'll say a punchline and then go, yeah, you can't see the video.

Yeah I'm looking okay.

If you if you watch Succession Ship, Roy is always going she's her, she's tucking.

Her head back and then looking to.

The side like, hmm, I think it's that.

I think.

Amy did invent it. Thank you Amy, Like that's I love. Amy invented a lot of things that you know, I don't think she gets credit for. And I think that she gets thrown under the bus now because she you know, people just get tired of seeing someone too much and then they have to that's what happens. Like, that's why I don't want to be too famous, because they'll turn on you eventually. But she was, yeah, she was you were friends with Amy, right, Brian.

Yeah, I did her website for seven years. That's right.

She's like, we need to we need tory my website through go Daddy.

She's so loyal, like there was there was no indication that she was ever going to drop me. And then when train Wreck came out, huh, I had to call her and say, I can't do your website anymore. I'm just a guy, like you need a company to do this. And then she was like that makes sense, and then that was it. Wow, Yeah I got there.

Yeah she but yeah, she definitely doesn't she would do the thing where she goes.

Yeah, and then she kind of does like an um afterwards. Hmmm, like there is that. Yes, there are other female comics that do it too. I do it like.

They are definitely Amy mannerisms I've picked up. There's there's just anyone I watch. I'll pick up something that they do and you could accuse me of stealing or whatever, but it's not conscious. But this mugging thing is taking up twenty five percent of these comics act and I don't see men doing it. I could see John going what huh huh like and at least he doesn't overuse it though I don't feel but maybe I'm being sexist here and I'm just like more jealous of women.

And I compare an I have a man, one, you have a man? Please tell I do it all the time because I love it, and I think I started doing.

The mugging too and it works, and I'm like, I'm disgusted why this works because the audience does love like a close up of like a confused woman. Okay, what works?

Well? My favorite comic is probably Norm MacDonald and he's probably the one who I got this from. And I think a lot of comics where you just lean into a punchline and you go says, punchline, my punchline.

You do talk like that?

That works?

That works, It totally works. I don't.

I don't think it works. It gives it a little boost, but you gotta be willing. It's gotta be funny already, and you can't rely on it too much. So I don't fault you for throwing that in.

I just my whole set is I just do this over and over.

No, you have actually funny jokes. But yes, I've been watching a lot of Norm recently. Did you see his SNL monologue when he hosted SNL a year and a half after being fired. No, Oh my god, you have to see You have to watch it again. It's on It was on Reddit. I saw it the other day. He pretty much says, they fired me from the show. And he goes, it's been a year and a half. He goes, they fired me because I'm not funny. What happened the past year and a half and now I'm funny?

This show sucks so now, and he pretty much is like, and then instead of saying at the end, he goes, you know how they always go, it's gonna be a great show, he goes, it's gonna be a terrible show. Tonight We've got Snoop Dogg. He was so good.

But you can hear the writers booing. I watched it because it said listen to Noram McDonald's SML monologue, and the writers are booing because he pretty much says it's a terrible show.

Wow, it's the only thing that could have happened. But he gets to it in a way that you can't deny. It's like he hasn't changed in a year and a half.

Why is this guy that was fired for not being funny suddenly left back on The only logical answer is is that the bar has been lowered. It's so good and you can't hate him for it because he's just so damn lovable. All Right, We've got a lot of show ahead of us. We're here with Brian, Noah and Anya will be back right after this. We're back. I got to say this weekend met a lot of besties and haven't had this kind of response to something new on the podcast in a while.

But people are on board with Brian Frangie.

They excited. I got a lot of side comments. I'm just like, I'm a bestie. We hug and everything, and then we're while we're taking a picture, They're just like, I really love Ryan, you know, like through their smile. It's so good. Ryan's the heart of the show. So they are fucking on board, dude. And I'm not lying. It was at least two to I would say three people probably.

That's how many people I venmo to do that.

Well, it was good.

It was well well spent because it made me feel like, Okay, I made the right choice. I'm taking all credit for people liking you. It's no, it was. It was an easy choice to make because, yeah, I was just thinking about you doing your little game of like give them a story or whatever that game was called on the

Yeah, yeah, it was many.

Years, it is. I was so fascinating that you remember that.

Thirteen handles, thirteen handles. Yeah, talking about New York like ten years sixteen handles, thank you. Ten years ago in New York on the street. We were on eighth Avenue. You were walking south. I was on yours.

Yeah, I was.

Living with Anya. So I was like, you know, I'm headed back to my apartment. I'm daancing because I was coming up from seventeenth was walking.

Back from UCB. So that UCB was at twenty sixth Street.

So you were walking downtown.

I was walking up and then you were with a girl that you were dating at the time.

Oh my god, yeah, oh my god, Now I remember this, this is you. Remember Now I'm questioning my choice.

I ran into you twice then, because there was one time I was leaving UCB and it was on my twenty sixth Street and I was like.

Oh my god on UCB. Yes, yes, and I think they're just us.

The fact that we ran into each other previously and you asked me about this girl.

Oh that's it. And then we walked for a little bit together.

No, yeah, wow, yeah, I think so. I think so too.

And that was that was before I even got the show Not Safe, which then I hired Brian my boyfriend and I hired Brian. I told my boyfriend about Brian. I was like, I think we got a guy to do our digital stuff. He's run Amy Schumer's website until she was doing train Wreck because and then he quit out of just like you know, realizing his here. And so Chris had one call with you and was like, I love this guy. And he's not someone who I I often have to be kind of careful about, like

Yeah.

And so I at first was very reluctant to give him a chance because I didn't want Kim Gamble to win and to like be like I told you so and take credit for my crush.

But and then cut to two months later, crying in her office. I love him. He doesn't talk to me.

She's like, you don't talk to him? Okay, So Brian, we then you flew out to La and you did you move to La?

It was a great text. I was, well. I also remember when I first started talking to Chris on the phone. He called me and I was in the supermarket buying bread and meats for a barbecue, and I was talking to him while I was like, listen, this is like, you know, in my perspective, this is not Chris Convey. This is a potential boss calling you to interview you. And so I had to pick up. I picked up and I was like, hello, I'd love to talk about I'm buying bread and meats and I'm about to go

And then there was the friendship that was set in stone, like.

Yeah, he he probably loved your honesty and he likes a little He likes a trip to the store.

Yeah, get trip to the store through the phone.

Anyway, who meets you? Got to be friends?

It was multiple meats, But I'm A text I got from you was one of the best texts of my life.

What did it say?

I remember this. I was also walking to the store, like not, I was walking the Whole Foods on uhl foods on your Oh my god, I have to say something about Arawan. I'm sure you have lots of opinions about arawuon.

Oh yeah, we've talked about Arawon.

Yeah, okay, But but first the text. I was walking the Whole Foods and I just got a text and it said it was from you, and it'd be weird for was it? It said, Brian? Would you will? It was an Ember alert, and I said, I got to get out of town. It was from you and it said, Brian, would you be willing to move to LA for a job? And I was like, of course I would? Are you kidding me? I also just had a recent series of calamities that made me really want to get out of New York. This is perfect.

Yeah, what were those calamities? Do you have your list of.

It didn't work out with a girl on Eighth Avenue.

Yeah, yep, we did break up and I had to move back. I didn't have to. I prefer to move back to Long Island and live with my dad. But oh, it's well, first, I love. Yeah, it's too long of a story, but I I. The first thing that happened was I was out. I was going out for a job. I was. I was very far along in the process of being a writer for the Daily Show. And then one of my arch nemesis is it was between me and another person. And this is also a blind packet submission.

God, I'm dying to know who this arch nemesis was. Well, I was still around. Are you still kicking around?

No?

They've had a fall from Grace that was greater than Hitler.

Uh.

I was devastated. And then long story short, I was robbed. I got into a car accident. I broke my wrist all in like the same day, and uh, then you texted me day but I did a very long story.

You robbed, a car accident, broke wrist. Were any of those connected?

Well? I was playing football in Brooklyn. I had a Zog sports football team.

And a group I almost joined one for soccer once. Yeah, it's just like a meet up group kind of thing for sports.

And now Zog is an anti Semitic slur, but oh geez, yeah, or is it zog? Yeah? Anyway, I was playing I was playing football, and your list is that is that one of the anxiety of things on your list? Ong, I was, I had my car parked and I had it was Halloween weekend. I had slept over my friend's house who had a Halloween party, and so I had

As supposed to larseny. They're like, this is grass like.

Grand they said that's yeah.

They said that, uh that is interesting.

Okay, grand larceny, yeah, which what does that mean to you? That just means that if you catch the criminal, that's a bigger.

But bigger offense because they stole over five.

It just you get to brag that you were grand. Yes, it's a better crime to brag a bag.

Ye, yes, yes, okay, So you broke your wrist while playing.

Well, so I didn't even know my wrist hurt a little bit, but they they broke into the car. I called the police, and the police like, do not give a shit about robbery. They will not come out. They don't care. But I told them I had a tracking device on my phone that on my phone, and so I used my friend's phone. I had find my iPhone and I said, I know where they are. I literally have their location, the person who robbed me. I have

While I was gone, well.

While I was gone, a totally separate person came and stole my gym bagh your car with my two friends next to the car, and I said, I got to go with the cops. I was distress. It was on the ground. Oh my god. Okay, well they that's another thing. They went. They sat in the car to wait, and they didn't realize the gym bags out there. Some guy pulled up and just stole the gym bag. It's all wrong in the same.

Fucking day and broke your wrist and not knowing, And then I'm guessing your wrist pain might have been psychological, if we're getting back to that risk.

And then I I was like, you know what, my wrist hurts a lot. And so the next day or a couple of days later, I have my dad drive me to the doctor. They do an x ray and my wrist. My wrist is broken from what I dove for an interception and landed. Yeah, I dove for an interception. I didn't intercept it. Nothing good happened.

We were to make friends at this, Like you do a lot of things to make friends. Were you trying to make friends with zog.

Sports back in the back? In my not judging it back then, I was not trying to make friends. You're just trying to have some fun.

I had a couple of friends. I had two friends.

Uh was telling me about a time in his life in la where he had no friends.

Oh yeah, Like this was.

Like no, because I had left town, like me Chris and Tim had all moved away, and he had no friends, and he was just going to like lantern lightings.

I was so desperate for friends.

Like an Echo park, Like there's like Chinese lantern lightings so much that's adorable.

Well, just to finish the story, yeah, sorry, sorry, So they said we got to send you for an X ray. I had my car back, although the window was broken. I did that thing that you know poor people do when they duct tape a piece of plastic over the window. While I'm driving to get my wrist X ray, somebody rear ends me. Oh, somebody rear ends me.

This is all within a couple of days.

This is all within less than a week from each other. And someone rear ends me. And then it's one of those guys who rear ends you and then immediately gets out of the car, and it's like, what the hell's happening? He gets out of the car.

You, yeah, he's mad at the situation.

Break Oh god, it was on Sunrin insurance. You've got a fucking trash bag.

And he gets broken wrist.

You're like, you're already one of those people who is in despair. And he gets out of the car and he goes, this is my mom's car. You gotta help me out. You can't. Please? Can we not call the police? Please? He starts doing that they where he like rubs the spot on the car that he hit. He's like, it's okay, it's okay. And I was like, you know what, it's fine. I don't, I can't. I just let it go. I get to the doctor and I realized that I really

And then you get a text for me how much sooner after.

Like four or five days.

Oh, that's great, amazing.

Four or five days.

I was a little premature on asking you if you'd moved. Text is important? Why is it important?

What you mean?

Is that text important to you?

Brian?

Oh? Well, it was my first job. It was my first ever job in the industry. I didn't work for anybody before that. I got I got close to the Daily Show, I didn't get it. And then other than that, I was just a piece of shit.

No, And that's why that's why he gets the job.

That's why I thought to give him the job not only because he's talented, but because he's a nice person. And I think that's what, like, you know, talent can take you so far, but like it, I don't know, I wouldn't. I wouldn't have hired someone who I thought was more talented than Brian if they were more of an ass, Like.

He's just a good, good guy.

So had you guys done any work together or were you just friendly?

What did you done? Had you done anything website?

Was I was the host for you? Uh multiple times at the Comedy Addict, right, Okay, I think it was your first if I'm not mistaken. Is that where your first headlining gig?

Yeah it was.

I hosted your first ever headlining and you had like a special like memory of like, oh, well you were the first person.

Yeah you were so nice and we hung out there backstage and stuff. Yeah you were just a Yeah, you were so And I think it was this show that we were doing because it was like Chris and I and then we had we were just trying to fill it with our friends, you know, like that's you have these opportunities you just want to give and you know, I remember hearing that story of your life and being like, oh, this is so exciting to give someone who's so down and out like a cool thing that other aside from

Then you moved to l a given lest we.

Left, and then you abandoned.

To these events.

Where did you find events to go to to make friends? Because I think we have a lot of listeners. Who would you know? And even me, I've moved to new towns and sometimes you just don't have friends. How do you make friends?

Yeah, I mean when you were alone in a new town, it's it's sheer desperation, which is looking back on it now, I was like so stupid. All I had to do was just go to open mics, you know, go to the improv and I would have made I would have made some friends. But it was just so disheartening for me to start over on the open mic scene after doing New York for whatever.

If you could, you would scene. There's no way you were going to do that. It just wasn't the right thing for you at the time. It would have been demoralizing in a different way than going to a lantern lighting.

Yes, so I went on different apps. There's like there was a bunch of different apps. There was meet up groups, and I would just look at like the events of the city and be like, maybe I'll meet someone. Literally, I went to like a Chinese lantern lighting thing hard exhibit, and I go there and I'm like, I wonder if I'll talk to anybody while I'm here, and I'm just looking at like beautiful.

I had one friend who did it? Can you say that? Can you say?

Was there one person rat friend?

I had my rat friend to me the other day at breakfast.

He was like, and I had one rat friend talking about.

An actual rat?

No? No, no, no, well that would be better actually animal figurative rat. He's not really a rat he was. I just like calling him a rat fan, because.

Like each other is what my point was, Like each other, You just it was out of necessity.

To friendship, of convenience.

And did he have a rat? Is am I like remembering that wrong? Did he have a pet rat or something? No?

No, he's just he just was a little weasely.

And you you have been you would like not actively not want to hang out with this person, but then you would just would because.

When you're so lonely, you have no options, And yeah, I mean it's either that. And then I joined a dodgeball league and I would just go. Nobody at the dodgeball league wanted to be friends with me because I wasn't uh dedicated enough to the craft of fucking the balls. And I got pelted like crazy. I hurt my arm. People would hit me in the face, they laugh at me, they'd point, they go because people in La they are obsessed with dodgeball. It's like pickleball. Now in Florida, It's yeah, no,

Pilly admire you for just going to these things solo.

It takes a lot.

Of hard to make friends in adulthood, bravery to just go to stuff alone.

I'm trying to think of stuff I've gone to alone. I know I've done it before. I'm not Taylor Swift parties, Oh yeah, Taylor Swift stuff, even the Taylor Swift concert. I mean I was meeting a busty there. But yeah, and I'm going alone actually this Saturday, and in Houston, I'm going one hundred percent alone.

But that's that.

I guess that's a similar thing, even though I'm going to be entertained the whole time, so I don't really have to talk to anyone. So it's like that fear of oh, no one's good, but.

Great for you. You're gonna have a cathartic experience that would be much greater than if you're with someone else you could do it with. You could have no qualms about going nuts.

Yeah, that's true.

I do.

I wonder how it'll be.

And then the next night I go with my mom and we're front row, and so that's going to be extremely special. And so I'm very excited about this weekend. And we're also I'm flying to La tomorrow. I'm filming a couple game shows, including Family Feud, and my family is all coming out. And today we're going to a fitting because we don't No one knows what to wear, And of course I got a stylist for myself and

I don't know what to wear. Nikki like, this isn't fair.

I mean, it was exactly like that, but it's like there's panic mode now, and so I go, okay, And so we're all going to a fitting later today.

Are you left to say which family? Which family? My family?

I know?

But like, is everyone like Lauren and Matt?

Oh yeah, so so my mom, my dad and Lauren and Matt are all going to be on it. I just post a picture of his family at the taping, so I'm like, yeah, then I'm allowed to say that I'm gonna tape this, yes, Steve Harvey. And then we're playing against another family, and I won't say who that is, but it's a famous guy from a band where their tongues are out all the time.

Okay, so that'll be maybe. So you don't know that a lot of bands do that?

Yeah, And I bet the Killers one time were like ah but yeah, so Anya, back to your anxieties. You went through this list and then I made Matt say all of his anxieties and that I said all of mine, and I do feel like we got somewhere through it. And then we played a question game where I was just asking questions about I just pulled up like deep questions to get to know each other, and we just all were answering questions.

Was so fun.

It was so fun, and Anya was like, how did you even come up with that? I'm like, I just go, just go questions if you're ever bored and you want to get to know people, because people don't like to talk about real stuff, but if you're prompted with a question, you kind of get into some some real stuff.

I was wondering if you were asking the thirty three questions that the New York Times was asking, or saying, will help you fall in love?

Right or no idea? I was kind of looking for that at first, but I forgot the number.

I knew it was like a specific number of questions. So, yeah, there's thirty three questions. I guess that you should ask your partner and then you stare deeply into each other's eyes for like four uninterrupted minutes, and then you're supposed to definitely fall in love with them. But did you learn anything about Matt or about yourself during that question game?

Yeah? I definitely. I was like shocked multiple times with the stuff he was telling you, But as always, I black out and I can't remember what it was now that you ask, I know we were.

I mean, it was a long day and then we had two shows that night. And I will say I was gifted by one of our besties with the Taylor Swift Midnight's album that as.

A signed.

Uh picture of her inside of it. It's my favorite Wait, well that's not it. It's my favorite picture of her. I know she this this Midnight stuff has done the best of any of her art stuff, but it's a picture of her on the couch that I'm obsessed with, and she signed it smell it.

And but it was this really nice fan.

I forget his name right now, but I've tagged him on the photos on Instagram that I put this up on. But he he and his I guess, I think his boyfriend.

They were so nice. I met them, those.

Guys, Yeah, they were so cute.

And there were so many cute tours that came to the Merch Withootoo there, like asking me how to get out of their own way and become better songwriters and how to succeed in music and I was just like, I don't.

I think you just have.

To write songs that you love to hear, and then you just have to be a nice person and get out in the world and like make relationships. Like you guys are talking about it's so underrated to just like pick up the phone when you're buying meats and be nice to someone that you've been nice, like hang out hung out with in the past, and like say yes to this.

Well.

I like that thing of writing songs that you want to hear or that some I read somewhere that's some art is best when you think about what is not in the world that I want to consume, What what is something I need right now that hasn't been done?

How can I make that?

That's a great place to start, no matter what you're you're doing. And I listen to you know who Rick Ross is? Rick Rubin, not Rick Ross, Sorry, but yes, Rick Ross is and also a music producer. But Rick Rubin, I always get them confused. I wonder why and Rick Rubin.

Legendary music producer, but he's kind of he doesn't you know. All these videos are going around, like viral videos of him saying like I don't play musical instrument.

I don't know how to work a soundboard. I just know I have taste, and artist trust me based on my taste of what I like and what I don't like. And he's not even a snob about his taste. I kind of felt bad after listening to this interview with him because she was asking about, like, does he have better taste than other people? He's like, no, I don't have better that. You can't you can't be You can't say that a Rihanna album is better than a Beyonce album.

Barry b A R. I. If you want to listen to the Rick Rubin because it's all about creativity. It was just the way he speaks is so soothing too.

I mean, he has a great voice and he's just chill, and I like the way he looks at creativity as something that you can tap into. And he said, you know, the best way to tap into it is to clear the thoughts, and the best way to clear your thoughts is meditation, like get closer to your real self. And it goes back to it harkens back to the thing I was talking about.

I probably talked.

About before the podcast because I talk about it all the time because I'm learning it. My voice lessons is like I'm He's always like, you're trying to sound like Taylor Swift and I can't help it, Like I've just I've only heard Taylor Swift sing these songs that I'm trying to sing. I don't know another way to sing them. It doesn't even make sense for me to sing them in a different way. I don't know. I'm just following

And I think I've.

Always known that, you know, like mimicking an artist is not going to be the right way to go, but I never I guess let it in that I could be the only way to get good, because close to good is Taylor Swift. Is not to ever sound like her.

Wise, and you like them and you don't know why.

It's because they are able through their shitty voice to give you the feeling that this song is meant to convey, oh yeah, better than someone who could do it in a really perfect way. And it allows you when you hear that, it allows you to like, Okay, well, let me like loosen up these rules I have for myself to sound perfect, because that's actually impeding the message I want to to convey.

Yeah, And I think it's like Bob Dylan. I mean Bob Dylan sounds like you know is He's like screeching through a vent and yeah, somebody.

It's always AM radio. Yeah.

I was listening to a band over the weekend on the radio and I was like, what is this? Like it's it was this. I'm not going to say who they are, but they're very big right now. Maybe you won't know them, but I mentioned them to Matt and he was like, these guys are like in the top ten of Americano music or some I'll find out. I forgot but anyway, her I was like, is this from nineteen thirty five? Like her voice was like ah, and

Yes, you got the feeling. You don't need that feeling in your life. I think we're drawn to things because we either that feeling resonates with us or we're void of that feeling and we need to feel it.

And it needs So you just weren't. You weren't in the mood for that. There are some people's voices yeah that really aren't for me. And maybe that's because they're not doing a good job of achieving delivering the feeling.

Or maybe it's a formula.

Maybe what Anya was sensing is that because this song is in the top ten or whatever, it is just following a formula and it goes against what Anya was saying previously about staying true to her own voice, what reck Rubin was saying, what Nikki, you have said about

Not giving people what you think they want because you can't you can't possibly predict. You think you can because you see what goes well on TikTok, you see what you admire, people that you like, and you go if I do that, I think that's why the mannerisms that are you know, poisoning female stand up comedy of this like kind of like these faces of like.

What these little mugs after the joke.

Those bug me not because they don't work or because they're not funny.

They seem insincere to me.

If we come back to anything that bugs me about stand up comedy, it's insincerity, and I think it's just performative and I don't like it because it's something that you had planned to do, which is not a problem.

We all plan our.

Sets, but it it comes from a place of I'm gonna do this thing because I've seen it work for other people, and that's what I don't like.

And it's not that I don't like that they do it. I don't like when I do it, and I'm projecting onto them. So please don't write these people and say I'm talking shit about you, because you'll be able to start seeing this in every female comic, including myself. It's you won't sub sing, it's it's it's everywhere these mugs. After that they land their joke, then they.

Go, oh yeah, why don't they look at it both to the side, like when Amy does it or did it or you know, continues to do it or whatever. It's funny, but it's not the punchline. And with a lot of these jokes I've seen the things you're talking about, that's the punchline. So they're like set up, set up,

You know, Amy's was a space for the audience to laugh where she didn't have to talk. It was giving her something to do for the laugh to come out, but still giving them something. So as they're laughing, she's making the face and you're right on you. I think that although a lot of these girls do have great punchlines and they are good comics, that's why it makes me mad.

I'm like, you don't need this shit.

You're adding these like tags, and I do stuff all the time that is so annoying in stand up and stuff that I've done that I could roll my eyes at. So these are probably younger comics, so I should be nicer. But I'm just calling out things that i'm noticing that annoy me, and I'm saying that I've done them before. Please don't come after these girls don't say Nicki Glazer's talking shit about you. I'm just calling out a thing I'm noticing. I've done it before too. We all make

I don't mind it.

But with every joke, I mean, I've saw a clip recently and I counted ten times that this little face was made and it's.

Just creuch for sure. And maybe it's also a trend. And that's annoying to me when when when you see the trend throughout, like in music, when everybody's was for a while they're doing what is that called? I forgot the term for ah behad the queeze my baby voice, like weird baby voice, but like not enunciating like queisme.

Dramaturgically, it didn't work for you. What's the word that I Meanturgically it didn't work for you. Okay, well we will talk about more and uh after this, and we we're gonna do reddit dump I think our first time doing that with Brian and uh so stay here, we'll be right by, all right, So let's get to reddit dump before I forget.

While you're looking up that reddit dump. One thing that men do in songs is they go, uh oh like.

That, yes was the thing I was thinking of, Oh like that.

To be done.

Oh, there's also a trend where in pop songs there was this it sounds like a group of guys and an Alley going, hey, hey, that's even in a Taylor's recent Tailor Shows song. And I like that she used it because she's kind of like, I feel like she has to know that that's being overused, but she was like, let's throw it anyway.

But yeah, if you start listening.

There also is a YouTube video where I learned about that, where it's like, if you listen to every pop song from like twenty fifteen on.

You hear hey, hey, I hate it's just like sounds like a group of guys walking down the street like in lockstep like Nazis.

To me, it really yeah, it's not great. Okay, Reddit dump makes me sick.

This is your redit dumb all right.

So this one is actually apropos because I'm about to go do family Feud with my fan and we are trying to prepare for it, and I've been playing family Feud on my phone. I've been playing it with my parents. We're not good at it. But the key to being good at family Feud is not being good at the game.

Noah, hit it, man, I'm something a burglar would not want to see when he breaks into a house.

Naked grandma, What speak grandma? It was the second answer. It was just like, uh, naked, What did you say?

I didn't really say naked grandma?

His face is yeah, na stretched it for that one. They give you naked grandma as occupant.

Yeah, yeah, just naked grandma.

And I said Matt, because Matt is the one in our family that can probably say the weirdest thing. My mom actually is going to do the lightning round or whatever it is. Because they tell you, like, who do you want to do that for your family? So it's gonna be lyrius, But that is That is the example I gave, Like I need you guys to be this random and this weird and this irreverent. Okay, let me look at a fun word one. Okay, Oh, this one I wanted to bring up because it was We've talked

Let me just say that I am.

I'm scrolling down to read the comments to be like, surely they told this woman, do not.

Do this disaster bad idea. You had a good day.

No gifts for the guy he can't yet, don't.

Literally.

I was just texting with Spade this morning because we had to do this Las Vegas interview when we were both on Katla and it was really funny, but we were talking about girls when they're like He's like, he was talking about girls saying like not getting back to him and being and just one girl wrote back like he's like, hey, you want to go to dinner night and she just wrote Coachella, and like we're talking and he has a joke that says, and by the way, Spade and I are going to be in Vegas next

But he said that he has a bit.

That I've heard before, but I want him to do it again about how girls will say they're bad at texting, and then he gets around them and they're like, like the whole time they're they're like, I'm.

Bad at texting. Sorry, they'll get back to you.

And I was telling him about a friend I had who convinced herself that the sky was in a train accident and that maybe she needed to like me.

I love it. So Anya went on a date with the guy.

It went well, which makes it more embarrassing.

Oh my god.

It's kind of like Franzi's thing of like getting that the guy who got the job at the Daily Show.

This person was really killing it at the time.

They quite a fall from grace since then still killing it because like cancel culture is not real.

End up getting nominated for an Oscar I think for something.

So Anya has a polite kiss on the cheek with this guy like after the date. Then he heads off she goes back down to the subway. They don't really hear from each other. I think you probably send him an email afterwards, just saying like this was before getting to I do the book that changed everything for all of us. And so then a few days later, there was like an amtrak derailment, like I don't know, in Connecticut or something, and she had heard he was going to Connecticut.

Like, yeah, he was filming there, and so she goes, I think I want to reach out to see like if he's okay, And I'm like, first of all, what are you gonna do if he's like pinned underneath the beverage cart, what are you going to do? First of all, thank god Audio reached out this girl I went on a date with five days ago. And then also Nikki.

Go babe, you'll hear about it on the news.

Definite.

Yes, he's the type of famous that, yes, he would absolutely be.

It would be like, oh my god, this guy was killed.

I just could his face that he was never gonna text me again.

Yes, So anyway, anyone, everyone in this comment section is like, dude, if a girl bakes me my favorite dessert on the second date, she's gonna be my girlfriend after that, because she's clearly the one for me.

These fucking sad losers are.

Just imagining this girlfriend there is Sorry to call them sad losers.

I don't mean that.

I just mean these guys don't know how they work psychologically.

You are not or you're.

Maybe uh the the female energy, which is not me calling you a simple loser. It's me saying like, you don't want a mess, you want a masculine energy woman, because a masculine energy woman is gonna get gift the shit out of you and you're gonna love it. But most men are not. But all these men think they would want that. That's the thing, Like you think that you would want this? Yeah, you're Because then Spade said

And we're just like, ugh, yeah, I was gonna say, read about the AMPTPR draft.

Heard about the Amtrak thing? Are you okay?

No?

Is it in your drafts? Is it in your drafts?

She also is more embarrassing. He told me that he had a little daughter. He told me that his daughter was gluten free and had Celiac or some bullshit. And in our stupid date. During our date, I had told him, Oh, there's this really cool frozen yogurt. She was allergic to dairy. I'm like, there's a fruit frozen yogurt place in New York. It's in the Union Square. It's all fruit. And he was like, Oh, really, that's really cool. I'd love to take her there where he seemed a little interested after

Like I honestly, I am disassociating. I literally stopped listening because I can't handle how embarrassing the system.

We never rought me back. I sent the cutest selfie of me with this.

Fruit cup and I was like, oh, was that before or after the train derailment?

Oh? It was after because I talked her out of the train derailment. And I go, just wait and.

Since, be honest, what if he was in the train derailment and he's dying and then he gets this picture of you with the frozen yogurt, just.

Reminding him of the daughter he's leaving behind as he bleeds out, I've done this before to set like sexual self like just like cute selfies, like is that that?

Like?

Remember the frozen yogurt?

Your daughter?

Here's my tit with that, here's me rubbing my nipple in this.

I have never I mean, I hope to never have to do this kind of shit again, where it's just so desperate and sad. I mean I said something to Chris over the weekend that really he didn't write back to, and I was kind of like, what the fuck, Like I put effort into it. So we watched the show alone, you know, where people dropped in the wilderness and they

Lmao.

Yes, do it in parentheses.

A guy like me would immediately fall ahead over heels for such a sweet thing. Another guy guy here, I would appreciate it and find this incredibly sweet. It would be weird if you brought like a random thing. But presumably his favorite came up in conversations, So this is love.

I think these are all bots.

These yes want to bang her exactly.

These are lonely, horny men that are just like, oh my god, the way to my heart is through my stomach. Like this kind of bullshit.

Now, let me just see what she wrote back because so she wrote back to one of these comments, and I want to share it with you. She had a little so she read all the comments, which I'm guessed these are just the top ones. Are people most in dating advice. It's very it's a positive flace on Reddit, and they're always kind of like lifting people up because it's so sad out there. So I think further beneath there have to be some negative comments that say don't

I just don't want to spook him out. Okay. Then someone said the right person doesn't run when spooked. She said, fair enough. So what do you think? Noah, I want to hear your thought on this, because you always have just such mindful and like you've memorized the getting too. I do book. You kind of know the rules, do you think? Because the girls will use this argument quite often and also to give advice to their friends, we all say like, well, if he doesn't like it, then

No need to say Russian in there.

Last time I said Russian stake. I wanted to say they had nothing to do with each other. I'm just saying she's Russian and a snake, a sleepy Russian snake. Okay, So where do you land Noah?

Okay, I would tell her, do not bake anything until you guys are in a relationship. That's like commitment level.

Well what if she's like, but I this is so who I am to bake a guy. I want a guy who is going to accept a cake on a first a second date. I want to be able to bake a guy who I had a great connection with. Okay, well, favorite thing. Here's that's who I am. Here's what I think about dating and what I hope. Well, because you're just saying what you think, you're in your I'm being in my masculine right now, And I hope.

He's not anywhere in the room because you should be talking from I feel if he's overhearing this.

Okay, I hope this is helpful when you're going out on dates. Think of it as like collecting information. You're collecting information about this person so that you can make a wise decision down the road whether or not you want to spend a lot of your time and openness and vulnerability with this person. So right now you're just kind of like in that phase of collecting information and it's not you don't want to be so giving because

So we're okay, just see it. We're setting cool, but.

We're setting the tone. Also, this is for the ladies. You're setting the tone for the relationship. So if you're you will have so much time to bake if you guys get married or you will have your life to bake and be yourself, get really honest about your motives really honest.

That's what I'm saying.

I think the motive here is he'll like me more if I do This is not scrape for.

It's not her being her. That's so it.

And you got to remember at the beginning, you're trying to attract each other. You're not in a relationship yet, so you got to do things that will continue the attraction because at that stage people could be dating that you're in competition with all the other daters.

That really knows this one thing she's doing. She's like, I'm trying to attract him. Will this attract him? And all the dudes are.

Like attracting these dudes on Reddit.

It is, but there they don't even know how much they would be unattracted to it if it were actually happening, if they knew that they had this woman on the hook and that there wasn't any chase. She's not only she's not only totally on board for you. This is also by the way cake on the second date can

He loves to him that you hope that you're in you hope he likes you. And that's not what dating is about. Like Noah said that in the beginning, he's courting you. I think, I know that's an antiquated idea and maybe no.

But if you're the feminine energy in the relationship, which you have to determine what you're going to be, If you're masculine energy woman, you're courting him, probably right, wouldn't you say?

Yeah? But you are both gathering data about each other, like Noah said, So he's going to gather about you, like, Oh, she's very uh giving, and she's going to bake me stuff and she's kind.

Of trying to them in an energy man would like a cake being baked for him, and that would be a good move to do if you were the second date, I think, well, I think what about a man doing that for a woman, let's say, buying her a baking I.

Wouldn't like that. That would be like two over the top.

I've done that before. I haven't made the cake, but I've done done early absolute disaster. What she should do is she should buy all the ingredients for the cake, and then she should bake the cake, and then she should cancel the date and eat the cake, and then the next day she should be like, oh, I ate this cake and like that's my favorite dessert. And she's like, oh, really, I didn't realize that's it.

That's it.

You want to know more masculine energy women, Nikki, Do you think you are that?

Yes?

I do in many ways, but I also think that I'm feminine energy in a relationship.

In the bedroom, I think.

He is masculine, but in a relationships.

Susculine energy woman in a relationship wouldn't get her feelings short about like not hearing from a guy or not being cherished, not being wooed. And I don't know that woman. I want to meet her. I would love to meet like a truly mass My sister in law is definitely masculine.

Energy and in a relationship too, Satie and I didn't hear in a relationship as well, Like she's masculine energy throughout the whole. Like in the romantic thing, I I will say that I don't really respond to flowers and stuff the way that I'm almost perf I appreciate them because it means efforts.

I guess it means they thought of me, but I don't.

I sometimes but that don't think it was.

Yeah, that's like a gift, like whether or not you like receiving gifts.

That's just like your love language. Or you just don't like flower.

You don't, You're not so are you? In your energy? Woman? You're your sister in law.

Would not need to hear like, would not need a guy to text her back.

She wouldn't need to have her feelings acknowledge like that wouldn't be something that sets her off.

But she would need like.

To be respected and all of her work and stuff like appreciated and all that.

So maybe if she was into baking.

Yeah, I'd get away with I don't care if Chris respects my thoughts like because I just I really don't because I know that he does.

I know that he thinks I'm funny. I know that he thinks I'm smart. He often says I'm smarter than him. I get that. I'm solid in that. I don't even need to hear that because I don't think I'm smarter than him. But I I'm confident in my thoughts being like, I don't I don't need that, but I do need when I'm sad someone to be like, it's okay to feel this way. Oh you're sad, like I do like that? Okay, moving on. This is from those subreddit cool guides, and

Oh?

God, like nothing, It's like what like for one song? Fifteen hundred streams is something? Isn't it like a dollar? I don't even know. I really don't know.

All right, Well, it is point zero zero four cents, so in order to make a dollar, what is that? Brian?

Are you good at math? Point zero zero four? So that's gonna need too. It goes to eight cents, So two streams would make you eight Sorry, with two streams would make you one nearly one cent?

Okay, three streams is going to make you two.

Hundred and fifty streams makes you a dollar? Really, I think so I just did.

I'll say three streams make you one cent, so three times that is one dollar or one hundred times, so three hundred streams will make you a dollar. I final thought, I encourage everyone today to stream on your Marina songs three hundred times.

That's like, I'll make it, give me just leave it on loop.

Yeah, that could work.

Do people do that?

I think?

So?

What if you did it? Anya? What if you just had like several computers running all day long looping your own music.

By the end of the week, you can buy yourself a Starbucks at all.

Yes, I'm hoping for that. Honestly pays me more than Spotify because I have points.

It's so weird. I just wanted to.

Like Taylor Swift, they've recently released the numbers of like her streams like on Spotify every day they're being like, you know, eighty billion plays or whatever, and you could you can kind of figure out what they're making from that and it'll make you sick. Okay, this is from me I r L And it's just a tweet. It's two tweets, actually, one person responding to the other. First person says, being new at a job is so embarrassing for no reason.

You just don't know what you can Always their hands are always like at their sides.

Kind of I'm always over dressed whenever I have a new job. I'm always wearing like a tuxedo in the office and everyone's like, this is casual.

Oh my god.

And the girl responded said, someone said, it feels like you're a new character on season five.

And the great news is.

Is that once you get once you learn the ropes, and you're there for like a month and a half, you're the fucking top dog. Like there's a great Like I do envy and I miss that feeling of like training someone new and being like, oh my god, I've come so far. I used to be in this position and not know where the aprons were, or where the checks went, or how to write in a peta order or whatever it was whenever a restaurant I was working.

That is a really like talk about stage fright.

I think that is so much more scary than doing open mic comedy. Like I don't think I've ever been so nervous in my life as I was being a waitress and having to be like, hey, guys, how are you tonight? So we've got some deals on Sam Adams tonight. If you guys are looking at a real thirsty also our special tonight is like it's a lot.

More desperate than trying to get laughs.

Oh, it's so embarrassing and I used to get so I can't even believe I did it, like even thinking about it. So I just want to give a shout out to everyone who's a waiter or waitress out there, Like it is a performance that you don't get a lot of credit for that most people could not do. Most people would never work in the restaurant industry because it would be too They just can't take that much. I'm guessing Noah is not someone who could ever would ever be a waitress.

I was just gonna say, I have never been a waitress or anything.

That Is that a reason? Maybe because it is a great job? And is that a reason because you want to talk to the table.

I always wanted to be like the kind of person who could have that tub and do that job.

But you know what, because I know that waiters and waitresses are not treated great, and maybe you just feel like it's just soul sucking and just such hellish work. Have a little bit of pride in what you do because it's so hard for most people to do that job. It really is public speaking on a very small like performing for four people at a four top like that is that is way harder than performing for thousands of people.

Worse if you're a comedian, and that is, if you do comedy at a restaurant, especially if they're not expecting common.

That is.

Man, there's this guy Kurt Ryan Comedy who does these hilarious memes on Instagram, and whether or not you're a comedian, especially if you're a comedian, you'll really appreciate them. I'm just gonna read some of them now that it's on my mind. Uh, Brian, you have to follow him because it's just it's all like inside baseball comedy stuff, but it's also.

I think other people can appreciate it.

There's a there's one guy that's like climbing a set of stairs and his leg is super long to reach the top step and he's on the bottom step, but his leg looks extended, and it says.

Open my comic is the guy is the guy?

It says, like, open my comic on this guy's back, And then each step has a different thing. It says hard work, strong, joke writing, paying dues, being social and building connections, message booker and harass him for spot like all these.

Things you have to do.

Then there's one of there's people just like vomiting into different like almost getty images of people like about to vomit into toilets, and on the top of it just says, when I'm on state, I like that. And then there's one of like Winnie the Pooh and it's like his face is calm and it says jokes.

And then it's the one that's kind of like and it says bits and then one of the ends, so like it looks like a really deranged in bred who it says little skits.

That's just based on what people call what you do comedy. Like when you start comedy, your aunt will be like, how are your little bits doing?

You know it's changing, it's changing, gen z TikTokers. There's skits now, they're all skits. That's the cool thing to say is y, yes, it's well. I couldn't believe it when it was happening.

Instead of saying bits like I'm working on this new skit.

It skits now it's all skits out. If you're especially if you're a social media person, it's like, I've got these new skits I'm working on. I'm doing these skits and that's cool. They don't know what a bit is. I don't even think, oh.

There's another one.

It's like, uh, it's a guy with a face the emoji of a guy going like oh, face palming. And at the top it's like has little arrows after each word it says I meet someone.

Then the next arrow we talk.

Next arrow they say, put that in your little skits and the next thing is die inside. So it's just like little things like this, and uh.

Our classic ant thing is like have you ever tried writing for snl oh? Like the same thing as little.

Skits I mean and classically I mean, these are all so tired for Brian and I because we've heard a million times. But I don't know if everyone else knows that we deal with this as like you know, obviously your comedian tell me a joke, or like you should hang out with me a little bit. You'll get a lot of material lining it out with us. Please never say any of these things to a comedian. You you might, I wouldn't know it unless I was a comedian. I

Do you remember those circumstances? Well?

I was gonna say two things. One is, people will sometimes come up to me and be like, well you I have some jokes for Naki while you give them to her. And the people are always like, I have these lyrics, do you want them for your songs?

I'm like, God, are you holding me?

No?

What happens all the time?

You'd think people would understand, at least not lyrics.

Well, you know what they don't because they're watching shows like Daisy Jones in the Six.

And I've got a problem with Daisy Jones in the six. Okay, I am so sick. There's nothing special about the show that is not exactly what happens on every other fucking show or movie about music. It happened in A Star is Born, where a woman writes some lyrics in her little journal and she writes a song. Then a man puts some guitar behind it, and suddenly he makes a full song out of her little scribbly lyrics that she's written down in a notebook that he shouldn't even be reading.

Bad and it was just every It's a show that makes you that already thinks you care about the characters, even though none of them are famous.

I don't know any of them. I don't have nothing.

Like sometimes a show you can almost care about a character early because you know this actor, and you're like, oh, I'm gonna be invested in this because none of these people you recognize. There's nothing about them that is likable. About any of them. You see them aged like twenty years ahead. They look younger than they do in the scene where they're young. The guy, the main guy, is too thin.

He looks like he should be on The Walking Dead as not a person that's like survived, but one of the Walkers. He looks he's too disturbingly corpsey. He keeps looking like a corpse. To me, that's no shade. He's a beautiful man now he's put on a little weight. But I don't I I don't get the attraction. I don't get holl He's like, Billy is the cool guy around town. I hate that this woman who has never once we haven't heard her sing except one time in

This is what we want to believe about musicians, is that if you like music enough, you can make it. So this girl goes to shows and she's in the audience and she's always just like feeling the music. And then she meets these musicians that she's been going to see and they're like, I've seen you in the crowd. You're not there for the band members, you're there for the music.

And she's like, you get me. And then this girl who has never sang is only scribbled some fucking lyrics in a notebook and took piano lessons when she was a kid, which we haven't seen any evidence of. She's walking by a place and it says like, uh, it says.

A loan piano, a lone piano or something. It says two words like lone piano on this board. And she walks in.

She kind of looks in the window. It's like I wish I could someday. I wonder if she's good. By the end of the son, of course, she walks in because her boyfriend has just told her that he's the main guy and she's never gonna be nothing. And she pushes this and says, I'm the main thing.

I'm a star, and he goes, okay, WEIRDO, I've never heard you sing, so this is weird that you suddenly want to be a star.

How am I supposed to glean that?

I was trying to bring you into my songwriting process because I do know that you're talented in writing, but you've never sang before.

So then she goes into this place, and of course she goes to the.

Mic, and she has a perfect voice, perfectly trained or and plays with meano. It's so good, and I'm just tired of it. That's not how anything works. It's giving people false expectations. It's giving girls a dream that cannot be realized.

That way. It says nothing of any hard work. It just shows if you like music enough, you can be a musician. It's so bad. I need you to watch it. I need to keep watching it.

But I will say that Chris said to me he goes, we're not watching episode two. He goes, this show is so bad that if you told me you watched the rest of the season and it was the best show you had ever seen and it completely turned around, I.

Still wouldn't watch it because it is. It is not good.

There's no redemption after this first episode. Now, if you like the show, I want to hear why, and I hope it. I am open to it. I'm open to why this is something you like.

Anybody they like the show after that, they're insane.

I mean, but some people like the sacram shit, and I don't like some people like to be Oh, I went Kirsten.

Kirsten's like, here's my impression of J. C. Jones. Oh, she said, And she's like, hey, guys, you want to hear a story. Are you ready for it?

I don't know if you all right?

I'll tell you if you guys think you can handle it.

Oh my god, I gotta keep watching it. I have to keep watching it.

Watch I haven't.

It's like kind of yeah, this energy coming out of me.

Feels sounds good to watch.

I want to sign you a show or I want to assign you a show or a movie. So that you can just tell me how much it sucks. Like Dungeons and Dragons, everybody seems to like and I watched it. I could not stop laughing in the theater because I thought, part, if it were so bad, I would love for you to see that and give me your take.

Let's start watching things we hate that will that people. But it has to be things that people like that we go, how are they liking this? Horrible Bosses for Me was another one. I walked out of the theater.

I don't understand how anyone, Oh, I have one lied to that much about you?

Everybody rad it was.

That the preview for that looked good, but I didn't believe that Anna Joy Taylor eats, so I wasn't able to watch it.

I was like, I'm this premise is already out of the boiler alert.

But the way that they solved the problem is, by the way, did you remember that you liked cheeseburgers? That's the how they solve the problem in the movie.

I oh, I don't know. Okay, you've seen the boiler alert, I spoiler alert.

Okay, Well, I definitely am going to watch more Daisy Jones than the Six because I just realized I need more things to make fun of because.

It's so different. Sorry, Okay, let's keep watching Daisy Jones in the six Everyone. You need to watch the first episode see if you agree with me, and if you like the show, tell me what to like about it, because I'm actually gonna try and I'm not gonna completely write it off like I do most things, even though I am in sense.

And if you did like it, I still would be friends with you. I didn't mean to say don't listen to the podcast. I still like you.

There's tons of things I like that you would hate. I eat a Columbine book that I signed this weekend. By the way, someone brought a Columbine book to the Meet and greet, a tattered book called Columbine that I've recommended by David Cullen, and I got to sign a Columbine book. The rest of the people in the line were deeply confused. Most people do not listen to the podcast, had no idea why I was signing a book called Columbine.