#299 Spitballing w/ 23andMe

the package room. UM and you open it up and you just spit into a tube and then you seal it up and then you send it back. It was, I mean, honestly, one of the easiest things I've ever done. I thought it was gonna be a lot more swabbing happening. And I will say that there was a piece of carrot that was in my spit from when I had been crunching some carrots before. So in the spit tube I had to dig out a bigger chunk of carrot. A tiny chunk of carrot did get caught in it.

So I did get the report back. I'm seventy rabbit and so I think that was you know, I think the kit was infiltrated by the carrot. No, they didn't seem to mind. Yeah, that you're going to be a ginger. I saw, Yeah, it was. I did. I did. Was. I was like, these people have seen it all, Like there was a little bit of like tint to my my spit. I was like, they're gonna be I know, they don't care, they've stand it all over at twenty three and me, But I spit in that tube. I mean,

it's fairly easy to do. You gotta like, you know, I felt like it was almost a sexual thing of just like trying to make your make your own lube. Oh yeah, I guess. Yeah. I just been in the box and just they can't. Yeah, eventually you ever done one before one of these? No, my little brother did. So. I figured if we had the same parents, it was going to be close. Uh. Yes, it turns out the same parents. Yeah. Yeah, we found out his dad and

mom were different. Yeah he was. He was milkman. I love that was always the person that your mom banged instead of your dad was the milkman. How like different, Like there was no bumble, no tinder, So you have to have sex with the milkman like that, the pharmacist,

the locals doctor. Yeah. Um, so yeah, I just set that off and then got and now with this thing, I thought it was, you know, the old twenty three of My dad also got one report before, and so we got to kind of see our ancestry report and it was pretty much what we had guessed. It was very Irish, very German, um, a little bit of h I had a little bit of Scandinavian and French in me, which I was excited about. But then now there's just so many more things that you can find out, um

on this targarian Targerian, I just want dragons. Well it is. I couldn't really say that you were trying to like, no, I do exactly what you're going for. I was just gonna let you dig your own grave. Yeah, I feels like a dragon just death. But it's anyways gotten it and shared as results. But I was always like, oh,

I guess I don't need to do it. But now that there's so much more that they can find out for you, um, there's like all of the it's like you get a whole health report that has your traits, things, physical features, uh like and just like also health things that you should know about that you might be more likely to you have in your life and maybe pass

on to your children if you have them. And I just wanted to go over our results because some of them are pretty hilarious and and I just want to break it all down, um in terms of like my UM health, I was I lucked out. I'm I'm pretty healthy person. I don't have many like um, the things that they were alerting me about. But you know, you can find out stuff that really could affect your health later in life, or like your family's health later in life,

things you're presupposed to genetically. Um, I have a likelihood I found out of developing type two diabetes. That's the kind that you're like, you can develop. I don't really know the difference between the two, but I guess I should now because I have a likelihood of developing type two diabetes. And it said that that likelihood would start between the ages of thirty eight and eighty and I just like that. I was like, did they choose thirty

eight because I am thirty eight. They're like, you don't even get a year before you have start worrying about this ship, bitch. Uh, I like they were watching in real time happen, Like it's it's starting. Like I could see the Type two in you for sure. I could see it. It's like, it's pretty like this is the start, this is the start of a whole new life instead of buying a sports car. You're like, I got type two diabetes. That's my midlife crisis. Um, what starts at

thirty eight in your life? That's the only thing that I've ever seen where that the that is the marker. And I'm like, why, it would be much nicer to be like if it were you know, I was it was thirty six, and I'd be like, Okay, I'm two years in. I've already like escaped it. It's like, note, this is worrying about this now. So that's something I

can be on the alert up because I didn't. I really didn't know that about myself at all, and I would have assumed that I was not prone to because I just I don't really, I don't really know my family's health history as much as I should, And I think this gives me a little bit more insight into that. I also have one variant of a rare genetic disorder that UM. I found out if I mate with someone who also has another variant of this, we could pass on the m c A D deficiency. It sounds really scary.

I was like, Oh my god, what is this and what it is is UM if we both if I mate with someone who also has this rare variant UM that our kid could get this and what the what the symptoms are. I was like, Oh no, what is it gonna be? Like it has like a golf ball head or you know, like their arms don't disconnect from their torso, or they have a claw feet or something,

which are all like things that are you know. I want to say this with no judgment if you are someone that carries those things or if you know someone that I'm just saying, those are possible genetic deformities that you can have if you mate with someone that also if you like happen to find the person that matches with you, but mine is I was like, Oh, what's

this gonna be. I gotta get Chris tested if we want to have kids, like, I don't want our kid to like have something that affects them, and the symptoms of this deficiency are our kid would just get dizzy spells if he ever fast it. It doesn't so our kid. I'm like, Chris, if we made we gotta make sure our kid does not do intermittent fasting. We gotta keep

him away from the Joe Rogan podcast. He can't listen to that, Like it's just such a funny like you hear, Yeah, yeah, he can't do UFC biting because he might get a little bit lightheaded. And it's um oh yeah exactly. He cannot be Muslim. Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's gonna it's gonna be a tough life for him. I saw this report and it was like, you know, there's like a um a, no, we're definitely having a boy. Are you kidding me? That's

part of my report? Um, I must have a boy. No. On the on the report, it had like a exclamation point of like make sure you see this, don't miss this, And I'm like, what kid doesn't get dizzy from not eating? Like I mean, I just feel like it was just a really funny trait um. But they give you other stuff too. I was just lucky to have like none

of those other ones. Did you have any of like the health ones Andrew that were like red flags, I'm gonna have a lisp and not be able to pronounce Targerians not real, but you know what that it's not a real one. But no, I had nothing really like jump out at me because I am a bit of a hypochondriac, so I was a little worried about learning

genetic disposition or whatever like our predisposition. I don't know if I want to know these things, like part of me would like to be kept in the dark, but I get it, like if I think you have a responsibility if it's out there to know it, and yeah, it's especially A lot of these things are just variants that you have on your genetic so they won't display at a child unless you mate with someone who also

has the same one, like the chances. So if you do have this thing, you can get your partner tested and then if they're in the clear, then you don't have a chance of passing this trade down on to a child, and your kid can stand up quickly after fasting and not get dizzy. And if they do have the trade, it's an easy out if you don't really want to be with them anyways, So listen, I don't want my daughter to be when she gets intorectic and never really someday because I passed that down to her

from just you know, more nurture than nature. Um, so I you didn't have any one said, I thought you were going to be no offense riddled with these things like it just seems like you don't even have like a likelihood of diabetes. Like how did I get that? I don't know. I guess you the carrot was in there. Uh tell your girlfriend, like, it's not you, it's twenty three in me. That's hilarious. It's an easy way. You're the women, No, babe, it's the genetic test um. So

what else I found out? Like I went through the traits, Like so you go into the health and traits and you see you get this whole report and you get to see, um, there's this one part. Let me just go to it real quick. Traits. You're more likely to drink less caffeine, which is yes. A month ago, I would say this is crazy, but Andrew. Andrew was shocked by the amount of caffeine I consume. I really don't

respond to caffeine that much. It found that I'm less, I'm more likely to dress, drink less caffeine because my body doesn't respond to caffeine like other people do. Um, which is what they found in my report, and it actually checks out. And I wouldn't have known this had I not quit caffeine recently, although my my decaf coffee intake has has remained in the same amount as it

was before I quit caffeine. So what I'm craving is not the caffeine, and what I'm craving is the ritual of getting coffee and having this warm like latte drink. It wasn't about the caffeine at all. I got a little bit of like caffeine headaches, but it was not anywhere compared to what I thought it was going to be and what I read about when people quit caffeine. And yeah, so that actually like totally checked out. I

was shocked to see that in my report. And then at the same time, I was weaning off caffeine and I found that, Um, I still drink as much coffee, it's just all decaffe So I'm not craving the caffeine. And it was right about that. UM, I like this one. You're predisposed to weigh six percent less than the average. I just I love a percentage in anything you know, Like, it's just yeah, it says I'm predisposed to weigh six percent less than average. It's like you're gonna be you

could be kind of skinny. You don't even expect it. I don't say that is dead on. I'm about I think that it actually did help me because I have been so obsessed with part my life has been like dieting and staying underweight so much of my life. And like from the time that I was even I never made it to like what my body is supposed to be it as an adult before I was starving myself, so I never really knew. I was just always so scared that it was going to go over that I

was always starving myself. But really, I'm uh, if I just let my body do its thing, I'm going and eat like a normal person, I will I will be on average. I bet I guess. I guess six percent less, way six percent less than most people, which is like it makes sense. My dad is like this lanky build and that was interesting to read. Um, my genetic mescal competisition is rare, and elite athletes well, no fucking ships.

They probably tested like the way I closed the cap on the thing, and we're like, this is not even all the way on. I don't understand. So it's rare and okay, so you have Okay, that's in. My genetic muscle composition is rare. Yours is not. Yeah, mine is in. Actually it's in. I have a body of a guy that would be really good at sports. Apparently, Yes, I mean, but doesn't that make sense for you? Like, doesn't didn't that feel so good to read? Yeah? It made me

actually work out with the word elite athlete. If this is a selling point to get guys to buy this report, you can see if your muscle composition is that of likely to be an elite athlete. I didn't know that these things could tell you that. I mean, I think, uh, I think it's right. I think I I definitely have it in my I just you can't think it's right science it is right. No, but you won't. I mean, every you've always said that you have like you're a

natural athlete. That makes sense for you for sure? For sure? No, it does, it does it definitely. It just made me feel happy, Like but then it's like if I'm not in shape, or if I'm not feeling an athlete. I'm like, well, it's there your potential, yeah, exactly, Like yeah, goshakes sixtix percent chance to not have dimples. Yeah, so there are all these reports about like what your likelihood is of like having these different things. Um, I want to go

through all dimples I have. Yeah, I have sixty percent chance I don't have dimples. Well, you're right twenty three me, I do not have dimples. Thanks for rubbing it in that I'm not adorable. Um, cleft chin. These are all genetic things, apparently, Um chance you do not have a cleft chin. Well, they're right, I do not have one might chance that I never had Dan Druff. Who knew Dan Dreff was genetic? I do not have Dan Dreff. Did you get these reports for yourself? Andrew? I did

I think there was. I had a stronger chance of having Dan Dreff, which I do have Dandre He has a fifty fifty chance of Sandroff. Yeah, so I got I got the bad fifty. Yeah. How do you take care of your dandruff? Um? I let it run wild and see what happens. No, like a thing where you're like insecure about it like, does it come down on your shoulders? Sometimes it used to. I mean, yeah, head and shoulders, it really does. Do you use head and shoulders?

I do? And oh I didn't know head and shoulders I used because I use another product for hair loss, which says that actually this says early hair loss not likely. I guess I'm old enough where it's laid hair. Yeah, let's be honest with what they're meaning by that. You're not a young and you might dress like you're twenty two, but um, yeah, let's not forget that's that was right? Yeah, I mean obviously that was earlobe type. What about your ear lobe type? Because I always knew that this was

a genetic predisposition. Was like, if your ear lobes are connected to your head or not at the bottom minor detached or no, no, no they're connected. Let me see this. Hold on, let me go to this. Yeah, no, you're not as are not connected? Oh that's not connected. No, that's a danglin like will you just let go of it for a second. Hold on, will you just flick it? Let me see what the kind of emotion we got there? Yeah, ears are detached? Mine? Oh, minor attached as fuck what

I've never even noticed? You never noticed? Look at interesting? It goes right down. There's no like they're attached. I'm very proud of my attached your lips. I love them so much. It's my favorite, one of my favorite things about myself. But my three reports said that I'm likely to have detached ear lobes, so I am beating the odds. I had a chance of having these ears, and I got them. Baby, I got your ear wax type? Um,

mine is so chance that I have wet, sticky ear wax? Well, you nailed it, h I do I think Asian people have dry, flaky ear wax. I think it's more crumbly and dry. That's the thing I heard, and it makes sense because I don't have any um. None of my ancestors are from that area. But my ear wax. I wish they would have given me like a report about how much i'd have, because I produce so much. I feel like it's like this should be of my body is ear wax, because that's how much I have. But

it is wet and sticky and orange. It looks like carrots. You can find. Maybe you need to break up with your boyfriend and he also has wet ear wax, because that will be just too much that our child will just be using wax and all over the place that one Mary Jose Museum. Oh yeah, Madam twossodes, our child will just be sculpture. Um what about eye color? Did they nail it for you? Actually? Yeah, it said I'm likely to have blue or green, and your boy's got hazel.

So that's uh yeah, percentage. It doesn't have percentage on my stuff. See, it's just like because my my sister and I definitely have different genetics because my sister's eyes are brown and mindset, I have a less than one percent chance of brown eyes. And it said it nailed it for me chance of blue eyes. Um so, And then what about finger length ratio? This was something I read about that if your ring finger is longer than your index finger, you're more likely to be a lesbian.

Or maybe it was your ring finger. Maybe it's the other one, my ring. Wait, hold on, let me look it up, because there was like a thing going around on TikTok ring finger ring finger point lesbian. Let me just type this in because for a while I sent it to all my friends and it kind of depends on how you hold your hand. Um, oh yeah, it's a This is in the BBC. Length of ring and index fingers are linked to sexuality. Women whose left index and ring fingers are different lengths are more likely to

be lesbians. A study suggests, my left hand they are exactly the same length, So I think I'm um. Scientists spasied with the fingers of eighteen pairs of female identical twins where one was straight in the other gay. On average, of lesbians but not the straight twins had different sized index and ring fingers, typically a male trait, but only on the left hand. So yeah, exactly typically a male trait. Um it said, if it's even a six percent chance my ring finger is longer than my index finger, it

is slightly longer, slightly longer, but almost exactly the same size. Uh, freckles, did you have a report? A boy? Your freckles little freckling is But I have a few frecks, but nothing crazy. I mean I used to have more as a kid. But yeah, I have a seventy percent chance that I have few, if any reckles. Um, hair photo bleaching. I did not understand this chance that you will experience hair photo bleaching. What does that mean I have a less

likely chance to experience this. I don't know photo bleaching. It I think is that when basking in the warmth of a sunny day is one way to lighten your mood and your hair. Photo bleaching is what happens when hair color lightens after a long exposure to the sun. That makes sense, Yeah, my hair just turns gray or I think, yes, I do experience hair photo bleaching because I used to get like white hair after the summer. So that's correct hair texture. Um, it nailed it for me.

Chance of slightly wavy hair? That is definitely my hair slightly wavy? What about yours? Same? I know? I think you pull up your report. What are we doing here? Let's go to break and come back with more about Andrew's hair texture right after this when he gets this report pulled up. Okay, we're back, Andrew, UM is gonna you have wavy hair? It predicted that, let's say, what like really quickly newborn hair. It's it predicted that I had little or no hair at birth, which is I

I don't even remember. But that's so cool that I could know that. It also predicts the chances that you have red hair. I have a one percent chance of having red hair. I only have it on my assholes. So it was right. Um. The skin pigmentation, Um, it definitely got it right. I have chance of very fair skin and then chance of moderately fair. So I am a whitey white white bitch. Um uh, sixty chance I have stretch marks. I don't have stretch marks, So it

got that wrong. I am a goddess. Toe length ratio um, chance that you have a longer big toe, um, and the chance that my long I have a longer big toete percent chance that I have a longer second toe. My second toe is longer. I beat the odds. It predicts you're brow if you have a uni brow, fifty percent chance I do not have a Uni brow. I do not. There's a forty two ship I like the phra. Chance you have a little bit of a uni brow,

which is being delicate. You have a little bit of one, A little bit of one that comes a lot a widow's peak. Do you have a widow's peak? Chance I don't have one. I feel like like, well, you got deep tracks too that are accentuating that. I can't tell if that was actually your hairline before or if you ever seated on the sides creating one. I have a hair which my wife wish she was a widow having fun things where it talks about taste and smell. It smells like if you It says I'm likely to smell

asparagus in p which isn't true. I can't smell it. Um, so I'm beating the odds there. I likely that I can taste bitter cilantro taste a version. I would love to see Noah's report for this, because she hates cilantro. She tastes soap, and I have a slightly higher odds of disliking cilantro. But I love cilantro. It is one of my favorite flavors. So that's um. I beat the odds for that. This is crazy ice cream flavor preference. I'm more likely to prefer chocolate over vanilla, and god

damn are they right. I don't understand people who would ever prefer vanilla over chocolate. I know vanilla is a taste and that it isn't the lack of like some people associate vanilla with like plain. No, vanilla is a specific taste. What would you like? What do you like more. It tells me that I'm more likely to like chocolate, but I am, Um, I would say I lean more to vanilla. Sorry, I'm not gonna if you want to do. But you get no topping. No, you get no topping.

You just get a bowl of ice cream. You were gonna go vanilla over chocolatella because I like a vanilla shake over a chocolate chake. Whoa, I am blown away? Okay, sweet versus salty? What did it say for you? It's right under ice cream. For me, it says I likely prefer sweet, and they are correct sir. Um. Oh yeah, salty for me. That's why I guess you know town do they say? They say, Nikki, the combination of your genetics and other factors make you likely to prefer sweet sex.

So they take everyone's results and then they put them against each other, and then based on surveys they do, they can determine, um, what you like. And so they nailed it for me, and then I really loved this than they do. There's a whole section called weird and Wonderful, and there's aleven different traits. Um. There is a thing. Um. First of all, I just want to say that it is it says I'm less likely than average to have a bunyon and boy is that off. Fear of heights.

I'm more likely than average to be afraid of heights. That is true. I am less likely to have a fear of public speaking. That is not true. I had a huge fear of it. I had to conquer it. Flat feet, I am less likely to have flat feet. I do not have flat feet. Um, that is correct. Less likely to have thick care Fuck you twenty three and me. You're right on that one. Ms aphonia. I am more likely to hate chowing sounds. That is true. I don't. I don't I like some of them. The

only ones I can't stand are my mom. She choose with her mouth clothes, but her jaw cracks in a way that discuss me. Mosquito bite frequency, well, this just came out last week that that your smell, and you're like, if you have this certain kind of chemical in your skin, mosquitoes are more likely to bite you. And I am likely to be bitten more often than others. I actually, as a kid got bitten a lot, and I don't anymore.

I do think it's because of a vegan diet. That's when I felt the shift um motion sickness, I'm more likely to experience most sickness. I do not feel like that is true for me. Photo seek photic sneeze reflex. That means when you see a light, you might sneeze. I am likely to not have that. And a wake up time. What is your wake up time? It gives you or likely to wake up around uh years old? It's I everything works out Amy, what are you yeah? Which is so early I would love if they said

yeah yeah. But then the really interesting one which we're going to test out is ability to match musical pitch. I have about a chance of being able to match a musical pitch. I don't really understand exactly what this means. If you hear a music note, musical note, can you sing it back while matching pitch comes match? Oh, this is just being if you have good pitch or not. So Noah, give us notes and then um, we'll go

back and forth and try to match them. And really the only way to determine if we're right is based on the other people who are hearing it in our listeners. So listeners will see what is your musical pitch likelihood? As well, I believe, so we'll see what happens. Let's see what it is. I have a feeling that you have a pretty good pitch based on I think I get here. Well, I don't think I can say it's like the same way. Yeah, so I don't know, babe. Okay, so let's um, let's try it out. No, will you

give us um some pitches? Okay, let me give you all right, this guy falls down in a well, his dog saves him, and I think it will be great. Let's buy twell up as out. Um. All right, Andrew, you go first, so she'll give you a note and then you have to match it. Okayn, fail, I can't get that. H Let's do it again. Okay, now do it to a different note. I'll just bring out my guitar. Hold up, you should get out your guitar. Okay. Um,

I don't know if it's perfectly Tookay, Andrew, match this wrong? Wrong, because I can. I think I have a good fitch perfect m a little higher, but it's on the same What do you do an open like g string or something? Okay, I'm serious, Andrew, You're off best. Sisily right to us and tell us what because I really can't tell, but I think I'm right, but I always do. Okay, I don't think I'm right. Okay, final thought, Um, a couple more. This is fun. Give me you got that one right?

That was good? That was good. The higher ones are tough. Okay, well let's try to make one again. The lober one you before you sucked up? Okay, well more time, got it, got it? Got it's good. Job keep trying, no job. Yeah, yeah, I don't know about what. I really loved learning all this weird stuff and just like seeing like if if my you know, it doesn't tell you exactly what you are, but what it does is like it makes you look at the things that you do have and you go, oh,

did I beat the odds or was I predictable? And what I came out? And it doesn't it makes you feel seen. I feel like I was so seen, and I think you were too. When I looked at your results that I can't flush alcohol and it says you can't either, and it explains why our hangovers were so bad and why we probably quit drinking because we were really yeah yeah, when neither one of us flush was like when your face gets really red Oh no, I'm thinking, like,

you flush it out of your system? Oh really, well, which one is it? Because I did see that. I don't know where's that. I want to find that damn it you know what means? I feel like that's what it was. But maybe I'm wrong here. Let me see unlikely to flush. I'm looking at this mine based when your genet, you were unlikely to flush after drinking alcohol. People with your genets can typically process alcohol normally. As a result, they don't tend to flush bright red in

the face or experience. See this is another Asian thing. Asian people with Asian heritage often get really red when they drink. I like how you're like, we don't flush it out of our systems. I was like, I wonder if this would predictive. I'm likely to flush the toilet because I forget to flush the toilet all the time. It's like a damn in there. No living was if I pee, like I don't flush? What if I'm living by myself, I don't care to pee on top of my pa, my pa unless it's like bright yellow. I

don't think it smells bad. But also I don't smell asparagus p even though twenty three me things that I would um. I I never I always forget to flush the toilet. I often also miss the toilet paper going into the toilet, Like I I backhanded behind me and it doesn't hit it in the bowl. And sometimes the toilets just on the ground. Yeah, I would say the time, I don't mean it has That's our show for today.

Thanks for joining us. Thank you to ty three and me for looking us up with all these fun, fascinating traces about ourselves. If I if there's poop on it, I will definitely get it in because I'm like cognizant. But if it's p and it's just like, I just kind of like toss it. And a lot of times it's just sitting there. When I used to live with Kirsten and our house on Tennessee Street, College, she had like a meeting. She's like, who is not putting the

toilet over? And I was just like, I never admitted it, but it was me, Kerson. If you're listening, it was me. It was me the whole time. Alright, guys, it's me. Hi, I'm the culprit. It's p Thank you for listening. Don't be Jack the Lantern for lesson Perfect, I'm not that great.