#289 In The Waiting Room

South Dakota. I performed in Iowa this weekend, two different shows on twoffer, two different sides of the state. Flew into town flight delays. I've been traveling to this this morning. It's now quarter to six, it's go to to six, and I am number six in line to get a COVID test. So right now I'm waiting to find out UM the urgent Care down the street, UM when they can fit me in because I have to get a COVID test because tomorrow I have to go to Boston

for one doctor's appointment. You heard me right, I have to fly to this. I've done this now twice, where I fly to Boston I'm flying in at nine am and then or I land at nine am and then I fly out at three to go back to Los Angeles all for one appointment for my post op with my vocal chord surgeon. And um, I have to get a COVID test before I go do it, so I have to go to this urgent care. It can't be one of the ones you do at home. UM, it

has to be a PCR. So it's annoying. I feel like I'm in one again and I don't like it. But it's Halloween tonight, Um, Sunday night. I just flew in and I landed, and I'm going to a concert tonight. My boyfriend's brothers band, Ludo l U d O is um a big deal and they're performing at the Pageant, which is the cool venue in town and they do like shows all all weekend. And so I'm going to that tonight with my parents, and I think Andrew might

be going with Brenna. I'm not sure. Um. Yeah, So I'm just trying to record this podcast as fast as possible, which you can't, like rush a podcast. It has to be a certain amount of time. But I wish I had more time. Um, but I'm just gonna keep checking my position in line. This is the way I work. Everything is streamlined so that I don't wait anywhere I'm I love that you get to check your position in line at the urgent care. I signed up to be in line while I was in Chicago on my way over.

I started at number nine. I'm now number five and that was two hours ago. So um yeah, not looking good to be done. I was supposed to fit in a podcast before now and then you guys don't care, who cares? Um, All all I know is that I

had great shows this weekend. I was a little bit nervous because it was my first dates of the new tour, which I called the Good Girl Tour because I just think it was a good way to follow up Good Clean Filth, which is the name of my last busial with like I'm a good girl and it's also a very sexual thing still, but it's also like I'm just so good, Like I'm not dirty at all. And the truth is, like I did I do it. I'm having less and less sex. Jokes. Um, maybe because I'm having

less and less sex. No, that's not true. It's just maybe I'm maturing that's not true either. I just, you know, I always said that I would have less sex jokes when I ceased to find it interesting. And maybe that's maybe that's it. Maybe I'm just um not finding it as fascinating anymore. Um, and I'm finding other things more interesting because it was funny. I was thinking about, Um, you know, I was starting to come out my walk on music. I've decided to do um Cardi b Whop

you know Meg the Stallion Whop. We all know it. It was out like fourteen years ago, and um, it feels like I'm you know, it's a little bit of like what a boomer move to, like like, look at the listen to this cool song. I'm coming out too. But I just love that song because it's so fucking filthy, and it was like the biggest hit. It was almost like the same as when that book The Subtle Art of Not Giving a fuck kid Um made like was like the number one book. And I'm like, why do

I get shamed for being sexual? Yet all these things that are naughty are like you know, number one's and um, sometimes I feel like, God, I need to clean up my act, but um, it's nice. I don't feel like people even associate me with like filth anymore, even though that's kind of was my brand before. But anyway, I was going to come out to that song and then I have a whole thing about how I like to start that way because it just eases you into what

I'm about to do. Um. But then I realized, like, I don't really have that much um dirty material anymore. I mean, it's a it's definitely like not all stuff I could do on the tonight show tomorrow. I would have to, you know, dust it off a little bit. Not dusted off that sounds like it's old material. I would have to polish it a little No, that sounds like it's not good enough. It's still it's good. I would have to um uh make it less funny so that it could be enjoyed on TV. Um, I guess.

But I was going through my act and I'm like, oh, I don't really talk about filth as much. So that was a nice realization. I had such fun shows. Um, so many besties came out. Um. Last night I met two girls who cried, and I just want to say that means so much to me. And actually three girls who cried this weekend when they met me, and that means so much to me because I know that I would be the same if I ever met my idol is a idol, you know who she is. No, Um,

I would definitely lose it. So it's like, I know what that is. I know what that means when someone freaks out that much like that means I mean so much to them, and it means so much to me that, UM, I elicit those feelings in them, and it's just so sweet. UM. So I shout out to Chrissie, Grace and Jennifer for

shedding some tears in my presence. You were also so sweet and you shared really sweet things with me about UM what I've helped you with, and it just helps me so much because I was kind of down today. I saw a picture of myself from last night's show that was deeply unflattering. Um. I looked like I was swallowed a basketball. Um. And I would have liked to be like, oh I ate a bunch before the show, or you know, I hadn't taken a ship in a couple of months, but that wasn't true. It was um,

it was just the way I am. And you know, one p sure I can just devastate you. And I felt bad because Matt my you know, Anya's uh fiance partner whatever she likes to call him. Um, he's my tour manager and he takes the pictures and he does a great job. But he sent me pictures and I was like, um, I can't post. Don't bother editing anymore, Like I can't see this, Like I thought I looked

great and it was not the case. Like I was doing a quick change though I didn't have time to look at a mirror because I go out and I sing with Anya at the end of her set, and then I run off stage on like I'll be right back, and then a video play is like kind of introing me, and I have like two minutes to change, so like I changed a whole new outfit. It's a quick change. That's what they call it in the biz. On Broadway, which I've never been, um, except in Nashville, you know,

to go shopping. But um, yeah, no. I was with someone who's from Nashville this weekend and she referred to Broadway like, oh, that's what they do on Broadway, Like, oh, this song plays on Broadway all the time. And I'm like really this song wagon Wheel. She was like, it's always been played at bars on Broadway. And I'm like, when did Broadway become Nashville? Like, we don't know you're

from Nashville. We're not in Nashville right now. Stop Like Broadway is New York, right, Like you hear Broadway, you go, oh, new York. I know every town has a Broadway. But unless we're in your town and you go, oh, they play this at bars in Broadway, maybe even add the word honky talk. This has played in a lot of honky tonks on Broadway. Like, maybe that will place me

in Nashville. But to assume Nashville in any other setting, or to to assume Broadway in any other setting other than the city of Nashville is in Nashville, is absurd. Um where was I? Oh? Yeah, quick change? So I went back out and um, yeah, I just the outfit I was wearing. It wasn't sucking in right, I didn't have the right underwear. I usually don't mind a panty line, but when you can see your panty line on the

front of your body, that's not a good sign. When you when you look like um Tim Allen in the Santa Claus like his stomach. It was so funny. I said the picture to my girl's chat to be like, hey, guys on five months pregnant, like big announcement, and they were like and Kirsten was like, oh, cool body con dress. I'm like, it's not. It's supposed to be like a flowy light like it's supposed to be like a baggy

pants suit. Like I'm not even joking. You're supposed to be like Olivia Wild style, like just like very flowy and loose fitting. And it was like she thought I was wearing like a Kardashian body con dress. Um. I was very devastated by that picture, which everyone can relate to, right. I know you're like Nikki if you think I'm not, I don't know you're like this. But if some people are like Nicky you think you look big, then what do you think of me? It's not about that, you know,

it's not about that. I'm just was having a bad morning and just looking to focus on something because something else in my life feels out of control. That's always the case. Um. But and honestly the truth is I was I'm just so stressed out about waking up at five or four thirty tomorrow to take this flight just for doctor's appointment. And I was supposed to take my niece and for you to go, Oh, I'm number four. Now, guys just checked updated. I'm going to leave when I'm

number three, so um, I'm gonna keep updating. But um, yeah, I just was supposed to be in St. Louis. I was gonna stay an extra day here. I'm here for this Ludo show, which is gonna be so fun tonight. Now I was going to sleep in tomorrow to the podcast with Andrew, and then I was gonna take my niece and nephew to go Halloween shopping. But no, I have to go to a doctor's appointment in Boston. And I'm just a little bit angry about it. And it's

not anyone's fault. The doctor likes to see me in person. I offered to go get a scope down my throat somewhere here and send him pictures, but he wants to see me in person. And you know what, he operated on a dell. So I'm gonna trust that man that he needs to see me in person. So and I'm grateful that, you know, I can even afford to do it. And have the luxury of time to do it and everything like that. But you know, we have something looming

and you're just a stress ball. That's me. Um. But I'm going to try to have fun tonight and be present. I just want to say last thing, I got off on a tangent. The girls that I met that cried. It is so nice. And if you ever meet me and you cry, or if you don't cry, don't feel bad. But if you do cry, definitely don't feel bad. It

was so nice and it just made me like. I went back into the green room after I met them last night, and meet and greets are always like a lot of energy to expel, and people are always like not always. I gotta stop saying always, and like, I know you're like, these are absolutes that I do not stand by. So just know when I say that it's hyperbole. I don't all think you're all like this. I don't always do this. I don't think you're always like this. But um, I went back in my green room and UM,

I was exhausted by the amount of motion. It stirred in me, you know, like I felt because I when someone cries in front of me, especially like because there I want to calm them down. I want to I want to make them feel okay about it, because a lot of times they're like, I'm so annoying, this is so lame, and I'm like, no, it's not. I love this, and and then I almost start crying and it's just like it's so special and it's almost like, um, what did I compare it to last night? It's draining, but

in a great way. And I don't I want you to ever not do it or think that my meet and greets are like you're bothering me or it's annoying. It is not annoying. Um. The only thing that's annoying is when people don't have their phones ready to take a picture. And even that I really don't care. But there's I know now, like, um, you know, and I said that Harry Styles on the street like didn't take

a picture. I think I told you guys, I think it's because he doesn't want anyone else to see to start getting in line, because when you take a long time to get your phone out to get a picture, people start going what is that person doing? And then they line up, and then those people see a line forming and then other people come up and then and it's not about like I want to give a picture to anyone who wants one. And I know these are like champagne problems, like when when to keep people want

to meet you and take a picture. You're such a bit I'm not. I realize how ridiculous this sounds, but I've learned that some people want a picture and they don't even know who you are. And that's what ticks me off is that they just a lot of people. Last night, I was like walking through the lobby and someone comes up from the show and it's like I want to take a picture and they're like talking to me as they're getting out their phone. It's like that's fine,

but they're just making their you know, being loud. And so then other people start seeing and be like who's that. I want to get a picture, and then they start lining up, and then you are get doing pictures with people and they don't even know who you are, and that I don't want to do um. But when you meet me at meet and greets, I love it. I

am it's my it's my favorite thing to do. It is it is draining in a way that I don't that is more so than the show itself, but but in a great way, like I would saying, oh, this is what I compared it to. I compared it to having orgasms, like I love, Like the whole meet and greet is like four play because everyone's generally just like

a great show. I take a picture, it's nice exchange, and then there's a couple of orgasms where you're like, oh my god, that's so sweet, and you're hugging a girl and she's crying and it's like I'm crying too, and I start like emotional, and and then it's like it feels so good. But afterwards you're kind of like and you need like to have a cigarette or an entire wolf down on an entire plate of broccolini, which

is what I did last night. Those are my cigarettes. Uh, And I was thinking, like, man, this would be it would be hard. I am not famous enough to have more than two girls cry Per Main and Grede that is like the most. Usually it's like one per like five shows I do, but last night they were two and it was awesome. But I was like, man, being Taylor Swift, where like everyone you meet cries probably would

be so draining. And that makes me realize, like why she probably doesn't go out much or Harry Styles are some of these people that, like everyone who meets the cries because you it's so nice, it feels so good. I hope that someday someone cries over meeting you. But I bet you like it. It's just like coming, that's exactly how it's like. It's the best feeling. And then afterwards you're like, oh, and you're just a little bit emotionally exhausted. But good part is I'm a girl, so

I can come multiple times in one meeting. Great session. Um. So I have to go get in line and drive over to get my COVID tests and I'll will be back either later tonight in the studio or I'm going to record some stuff on the road tomorrow during my travels. So um, stay right there, We'll be right back. And hey, guys, thank you for listening to this special solo episode of the podcast. I am on tour right now. I met Bestiss this weekend. Please come out and see me. It

is so much goddamn fun to meet you guys. Um. As always, if you go alone to a show, if you write me going alone, your name and the city you're going to. Only that nothing else. You don't need to say thank you. I know you're grateful. You can tell me in person your name or going alone in all gaps um and then the city in your name, but make sure going alone is first. The other two you can put them on whatever you order you want.

I will give you a free meet and greet um. Otherwise, meet and greets are available for purchase at the merch booth. I also have new merch that is so cool and is only available if you come see me in person, and I love it. One of the shirts is modeled off the Taylor swift and the other one is modeled off of a Wilco shirt. Yeah, I'm an original, but I like what I like and I just thought those designs were cool. And it's the best march I've ever had, and I'm so excited for you guys to support some

of it. Upcoming shows Reno Santa um Rosa, California that is this weekend. Then next weekend is going to be San Jose, I believe in thousands Oaks, California, and then we're looking at Burlington, Vermont, Providence, Rhode Island, St. Louis and many many more in the new year. Check them out Nikki Glaser dot com. See if I'm coming to your city. I would love to meet you and love to see you. I hope you can be there, I really hope. So hey guys, I'm back. It is still

Sunday night. I thought I might not be back till tomorrow. But um, during the commercial break, I went to a concert. Um. I went to go see Ludo. My boyfriend's brothers band. UM is in a band called Ludo and they you might know them, I mean a lot of people do. The was a three night extravaganza at the pageant in town and Um it's called Ludo Weeen and during Halloween. Every year they come to St. Louis and do three

shows and sell out these this big room. And tonight was Sunday and it was packed and everyone sings along. They're so good. Um, you should check at them out. My favorite songs of theirs are Topeka It's a masterpiece. UM Broken Bride Part one I believe it's called and then Scare Me is my ultimate favorite song. It's such

a good Halloween bop. It is so fun. If you need motivation on a treadmill or out on a run or just a brisk walk, or you're just I don't need need to a new rhythm, to funk, to um really fast, Scare me by Ludo l U d o is awesome. But I went with my parents. They picked me up and we went there and it was so fun and I got to see some people. Ran into a girl from high school that I hadn't seen since two thousand two and I really loved her, Sarah Holt shout out. Um. I ran into a couple of fans.

I don't know if any besties were there, but it was fun. There was um a guy earlier tonight. I went and got a COVID test. Oh yeah, that's the last time I talked to you guys. So I went and got my COVID test, and UM, that was funny too because I went to I was, you know, I left here when I was number four in line, and then I started driving and then I'm number three and I'm like sweet, and then number three is just sitting

there and I'm like, oh Jesus Christ. And then I go to a quick trip because I'm like, I'm not going to go just sit in my car in the parking lot. Of this place. And then I stopped in QT and I needed to grab some like dinner equals a kind bar or two or three I think I got. I got to and I really enjoy the dark chocolate uh sea salt ones that are like lower sugar delish, and so I got two of those, and on the way out, I had my air pods in and I

was listening to something, probably Taylor Swift. Let's be honest, I was supposed to listen to Ludo Um to get amped up, but I just can't help myself with the Taylor Swift album, which I'll probably talk about even more in just a second, So brace yourselves. And I'm leaving the quick Trip and this guy's walking in and I can't see. I can't hear what he says because I

have my air pods. And if you guys have air pods, do you have the same problem where if you have the noise canceling feature, you literally couldn't hear a tornado warning if you were standing next to the funnel, like you can't hear anything when you've got those on. If you see people with air pods and you don't have air pods, just know those people are not being rude.

They literally can't hear you. And so I he said something to me and it was just a look of like high, but it wasn't like we knew each other kind of high. And I was like, oh hey, and I was like, I just thought it was like a very quick um. He recognized me. It was just a quick hello, and I was like, I love that, like

just to not like like um. It almost reminded me of I have friends in Australia who are uber famous down there, like you kind of can't get more famous than they are unless you're Hugh Jackman and they're best friends with Hugh Jackman, Andy Lee and Hamish Blake, and down in Australia, there's this thing of like they don't like people think getting famous and then being better than everyone. It's called like the tall poppy. They call it, like being a tall poppy, like you're don't be like the

other poppies, like everyone's on the same level. It's like communism, you know, No, it's some it's just about like they don't want anyone grandstanding or you know, celebrities being better than everyone else, which I completely support. And maybe I'll talk more about that in a second, because I am kind of tired of that. UM had an experience the other day where I was just like, what why do I get treated so nice and everyone else on this show does not? UM, and I get it, like the

were talent in and of itself. That's what they call people who are on a TV show, who are the you know, the people on the show. Like so if I'm doing like a talk show or like, I'm the talent. And I've always known that, but I think that word really did freak me out. When I started being talent. They'd be like, well, your talent, and I'm like, that is um. You know, that's subjective. Honestly, that word should

not be extended to everyone that is called talent. And there's something about it that I mean, I guess I'm getting to it now. Talent is just treated better than anyone else on set. So like if there's someone, you know, if there's the key grips, can't just sit down and take a break when we're stopped down. Stopped down means like production is stopped and thenre's something happening. It's like in football when everything stops and you're like, what's going on?

That's kind of the same thing. I really do a lot of great football analogies. Um, and when they're stopped down, like the key group doesn't have a job. But if he sits down, it's like he'll get in trouble. But if I sit down, it's like, yes, please give her chair, find her something. I get it, like I have to be on when I'm on camera and stuff, but I just feel like everyone should be treated equally on set. Do I benefit from not being treated equally? Helly, yeah

I do. I mean I was in a trailer all day long on Friday, all day long, and was I in a bad mood for some of it? You damn Tuton, I was. I was supposed to be on set at twelve o'clock. Um, they didn't really tell me when we're supposed to be ready to be on camera, but I'm guessing around two thirty. So I get there twelve hair and makeup. By two thirty, I am ready to go.

We didn't start taping until six, so I'm just sitting my trailer and you know what, that's production like not complaining, but I am kind of complaining, but not you know, like who cares. I have the easiest thing to do, which is just wait in an air conditioned, beautiful trailer with a fireplace in it. Who needs that? Not me? I don't know. But it was great with snacks and everything. What am I complaining? But I was just waiting all day and and I didn't really know when I was

supposed to go. Don't you hate when you're waiting and you don't know how long it's going to be. I think that's the trouble. I think that's like just knowing the plan is takes away so much of the pressure. I felt bad because I kept asking, like what is the run of show? When? What you know? Like once we start the show, like what how many acts are there? Like what's when do we expect to get out of here?

I just not because I wanted to leave. I wanted to leave, but like, really, you just want to know where you're going. I used to have like a boyfriend who whenever we would go somewhere, he wouldn't he would know where we're going, and he wouldn't like tell me, he just like turn right on a street. We'd be walking, and I would just be like, can me, can you like you get some kind of joy out of being in control? And I don't know where we're going. I like to know the plan. Maybe I need to just

relax and go with the fucking flow. But um, it does bug me that we're treated so nicely. UM, I would like to see it even doubt a little bit, not totally because I still I still like all the firs. I still want a trailer, but like I think everyone else should have a sit down area area. UM. For instance, okay, so if if we go on lunch break right, um, all the talent, like the crew will line up for lunch, and let's say the talent takes a little bit longer

to get to go in line. Everyone breaks for lunch, so the crew just heads right out right, maybe the talent needs to be take off their mics and maybe get into robes, so they get out of wardrobe and then they head over to lunch. And my handlers or the people that are kind of like handling the handlers, um Chelsea and her brother No. Um, they usually are like cut the line, you know, like we're gonna get Nikki in here to go first, And I'm always like I am not going to cut the line for the

buffet or whatever. You know. The thing, it just feels so rude, But I guess it makes sense because we had to take longer and maybe we have to get into hair and makeup earlier. I mean, some of this makes sense. I just I think there is a lot of privilege going on that is doesn't make sense because I don't know. I just you can just sense that there is a fear of talent that is begotten. Is

that the right word by talent being country? Like? The reason we're treated so nicely is because talent before me complained and was like, I'm better than everyone. I need this, and you're like, I don't need you know. I guess I'm trying to think of like what they give me that I'm just like I can do that myself. I don't know. It's it's who cares, Nikki, Shut up, move on,

go back to um. Okay, So the quick trip guy, he said, does a little not of recognition, and I was like, oh, that was nice, just a quick passing thing. I don't really get recognized in St. Louis that much? Um it happens. People sometimes wonder that, and I guess I would wonder that too if I it wasn't someone who lived it, Like how much do you get recognized? I guess that was actually always very interesting to me about famous people, Like what's it like? And I it's

still interested me. It's one of the questions I always ask celebrities is like, how do you deal with people coming up to you? What's the best way to approach you? Um, you know, from behind? Uh? Do I you know, punch you in the nose like a shark if you get aggressive? So yeah, he just nodded, and I was like, oh, that's cool. So anyway, yeah, I don't get recognized in St. Louis that much, but in l A it happens a

lot more. And in fact, bestie the other day, Chris and I were having brunch on I like, how I just said brunch, brunch, brunch on the street, and you know, our table was on the street and a girl drove said she drove by and she saw me and she listens to the podcast, so she knew I was living in the area and she was like, I wonder if I'll see Nikki. And then I'm sitting there having brunch. This bitch double parks and gets out of her car and comes over to say hi, and like leaves her

car running. I loved it, took a picture, had a good time. Hello to you if you're listening. That was so nice and fun and just like walking down the street the other night, there was a girl that recognized me and that made my night. It was very nice. So anyway, shout out to all those people and every kind of interest. I don't know why people. I'm very paranoid about being unrelatable now because one person said that I was not being relatable because I was complaining about

how I didn't want to get my kitchen done. Um, and she had a right to complain about that, Like I'm guessing she would love to get her kitchen done, and here I am being like, I just don't even want to do it, Like it's just you have all this money and I don't want to put it towards that, Like I would be annoyed with myself too. So shout out to that girl. You have every right. But I guess I'm a little paranoid right now about being unrelatable. But you know I I can't. I'll try. I try

to be like I, Um, okay, I'll be relatable right now. Um, well, I guess I was relatable before I saw a picture of myself that ruined my day. Who doesn't experience that out in the world. Jesus Christ. Do men feel that way as often as women? I shout out to if you do. But I was talking to my girl's chat today and we were all talking. I was crying about my I did cry today. We've been cry counting our cries and our combs. And I cried today on the plane. Um,

because Kirsten gave me permission to do so. She private messaged me after I complained about looking bad and she was like, hey, are you okay? And just that tenderness just like breaks me. Does that ever get you? Guys when you're like crying, like you gotta cry and then someone just puts their hand on your shoulder gently or just goes come here and you just go like and it's like, lets you release. Um yeah, that always helps me cry. So she gave me permission and I cried

a little bit. But um, I just had some cheers falling down and UM got them all over the place. It's late, can I It's eleven o'clock and um, I have to be up at three thirty to take my flights,

So I'm a little scatter brained. But I go to my COVID test after the QT interrupt interruption interaction UM, and I get my COVID test and I go in and I've been there three times now because I get this COVID test every time I go to the doctor and or every time I go to get to Boston to get my vocal cord check up or to get the surgery, I have to get a COVID test to

get into mass General, which is the hospital there. And I go to get my COVID tests at this place that does PCR rapids, which is not an easy thing to find someone to give you. So I go in and I recognize all the people behind the counter. I recognize them. I'm like, hey, and I asked for a picture. No they I go back and I'm waiting in the room. I'm number one now and I'm like yes, And I'm waiting there and there's Food TV Network on the TV.

I can take a waiting I was like, that's so nice that they have a waiting room in the little exam room, or they they have a waiting TV, a TV waiting for you to watch. It was Food Network some like Halloween challenge that I was at first rolling my eyes about, and then I was gripped by a challenge. They had to make zombies at a speakeasy. I'm like, have they run out of category things to do on these shows? The category the challenge was you have to make a ghoulish speak easy. I'm like, that is so

oddly specific. Anyway, Um, I'm in the waiting room and then all of a sudden on the door and I'm like, yes, I'm getting my COVID tests. And then these two younger technicians I don't even think technicians. They worked the front desk. They come in and they saw me when I signed in, and I thought there was a little bit of recognition, but I've also been in there a bunch, so I didn't even think anything of it. And um, and they didn't set anything before, but they go, um, excuse me,

were you in Dancing with the Stars? Ah? You guys. I'd never get recognized on that show. And it's so funny. This happens a lot where I'll go, oh my god. Yes, I was like, do you want to know about Dancing with the Stars. Whenever I meet a fan of Dancing with the Stars, I'm a fan of Dancing with the stars, or at least the experience that I had. So I love to give people insider info about the show that they love, and not insider info that's going to break

their heart about the show. But it's more stuff that's like, oh, you want to know who's actually like the nicest in the world, and who's the who's funny, and who's cool, and like what it's really like to do it. They really didn't care about the details. I was spelling all the deeds. I was like, Val is the nicest, Sasha is the nicest. Um. That's where it ends. No, Um, Brandon is so nice, Alan is so nice? Um, and

the rest. I just not that they weren't nice. I mean, there were a couple of people that weren't nice, but I won't name names, but um, most of people I just didn't interact with him. M A was very nice anyway, if you're dancing with the star's head, um, and they

just didn't care. They were just like, oh and they It's almost like I come on too strong sometimes two fans because I'm like, oh my god, I'm so glad you said something, because they're like, is this weird, And I'm like, no, let's take a picture, and we took our masks down. We took a picture. Anyway, So I leave, I get a negative test and I pay them to give me one and just kidding, I got one. And I leave and I go home and I go to Ludo.

My parents picked me up. Go to Ludo and we're standing there and all of a sudden, this guy is like kind of double looking at me and he goes, hey, QT earlier tonight, and I was like, oh my god. He was like I was the guy that like nodded at you. And I was like, I had my air pods and he was like, no, I knew, I just I just want I wanted to give you a nod. And he was so nice with the nod, Like can I just say this guy like, I really just appreciated

his interaction with me. But then he got a little too drunk and then it was just a little bit obnoxious. Drinking just never brings out the buston people. But he was super nice. We had um he wanted to have a moment with me during one of the songs that we both really loved, and that was sweet. Um, but shout out to that guy, Um, you were so sweet and you were nice with my parents, but you were

a little drunk. Um. But there's nothing wrong with that unless it's ruining your life, which I'm guessing it will eventually, But for now, you're a great guy. And I had fun and it was cool to see him again. Um later that night, and then I um, and then I just got home and I packed a lot, and that's my night. Let's look at the news. So, in lieu of doing um news stories that Noah has picked specifically for me, I am just going to go through my my reddit and go through just the news stories. So um,

let's go to it. Um. Okay, here I see something in entertainment. Fifty cent tells you to start shutting the funk up. It's really funny to tell someone to start shutting the funk up. You need to start shutting the funk up. Why is that funny? Like, it's because it's like usually need you need to shut the funk up. But like start shutting the funk up means you need to prepare to do that, or means you it's just a funny way to say it. Um. Oh, he tells him to start shutting the funk up. A mid hitler

fandom allegations people are really hurt, true dad. And I didn't say that because I'm talking about two black men and I just would have said true dad anyway. But it did sound really um, just like a honky white person trying to sound cool. Um. Yeah, it's people are really hurt. Isn't that that? That's what a great way to say it. First of all, love saying start start shutting the funk up, and also say people are really hurt. That's all you need to know people really hurt. But

you know, I would guess that Kanye is really hurt. Um, And he clearly is. I mean his divorce stuff with his kids. He's clearly never recovered from the pain of losing his mom um, the pain of not really having a relationship with his father. I mean, that guy is in a lot of pain. And I hate to say if he could help himself, he he um, he would, but he can't. And so I as I'm so sad about it. And I'm shout out to all of my Jewish listeners and friends out there who are feeling extra

sensitive right now. That sounds bad. Um. Our feet are just feeling this and feeling like this kind of um this percolating hatred for who you are that you've kind of always felt your whole lives, and then it's just it's being amplified right now, and uh, it just sucks and it must feel really shitty and I don't know what that's like to feel. And so I'm really sorry if you're feeling that. Okay, moving on, Um did you like that? Moving on? Just like after a really poignant statement.

But I swear to God, I really do feel for all of you, and um, yeah, and I love you. Okay. This is in technology. New compound discovered that destroys the MERSA superbug. Okay, so mersa is in infection of bacterial infection. I think let's see, um, it renders it more vulnerable to antibiotics and lab experience. Yeah. So I only bring this up because I had Mercia once. When I got a my first Brazilian bikini wax. This girl had just been trained. She definitely like it wasn't clean stuff. My

boyfriend was coming to visit me. My parents were out of town. I was living in with my parents, um, probably two thousand's nine summer, and they were out of town, and my boyfriend was coming into town. He lived. He just moved to New York from St. Louis. But he's coming back and we're having the weekend together and we're gonna have so much sex, and um, I got a Brazilian and it got oh my god, it was the worst,

you guys, it was the worst. Okay, honestly, ear muffs if you are sensitive to disgusting information, but about body stuff. But every single hair follicle on my vagina was ripped out. And then imagine all of those hair follicles a white head performing like literally thousands of them, and it was I just didn't even know what to do. It was. It was so painful, it was terrible. It was I'm just so sad for myself because I didn't know what to do. I was also so ashamed because he was

my new boyfriend. I was trying to do this to be sexy for him and then fucking backfired. So we would be having sex and I wouldn't let him look at it or but it was so painful obviously to have sex. But I didn't have enough of a you know, I wanted to have sex to them, but I also didn't have enough self esteem to be like, I can't

like I'm injured right now. I just like, you know, we never saw each other, so I would just hold my hand over it, or put like a cloth on it, or like a wet rag over like my mom's pubis. Why do I know what that is? Like the top part, you know, and just oh my god. It was so awful.

And I remember I had a party and I had been invited her when she did it, and so she came over the party and she didn't know that I had been infected, and I was too embarrassed to tell her that I was because I thought I had done something wrong. And I remember he made a joke because he told him not to tell her either, even though he was well aware of the pain it caused me. And I remember him making some statement like, hey, it

looks good. Thanks for making her look great, like you know, like kind of ha ha like, because she was like, oh, it's did you enjoy my work? And he's like I'm a big fan or something, and I was like, oh god, we're both lying to her. I am in so much pain. And then it turned into because then Mercia lives in your nose, so he's going down on me down there, and it gets in oh man, and I got I got a mercy infection. And then my parents get back in town. He's long gone, I mean not like from

my life, but eventually he's long gone. He's back in New York. I'm living with my parents. I am in so much. There is pain shooting down my leg, like all over my body. It felt like I it was like in my heart. I was just incredible pain. And my my dad was just like, that's just a spider bite. Because I had these A couple of the hair follicles were so infected. They were just gigantic and red and puss. Oh my god, it was so bad. My pussy was pussing and my pussy was pussy, pussy, pussy. And my

dad was just like taken ups and salt bath. And so that was like the start of realizing my parents I don't like to seek medical intervention. They just are like waited out, you know, and oh, it's just probably a spider bite, epps and salt in a bath. And so I did that a bunch didn't help. I finally go to see a dermatologist and she's like, that is

a staff infection, that is MERSA. And I took some antibiotics, and I remember I went to San Francisco to do some shows that weekend, and I was on the plane and I was in the most pain of ever, one of the most times, worst times I've ever felt. I was shooting down my leg and I was just like crying in agony. And I got to San Francisco it started to feel better, and I remember there was one on my butt and I remember it burst on the street and I felt this gigantic gush of fucking watery

stuff go down my leg. I'm so sorry for the story. No one deserves this. Let's move on. Okay, um sports, no thank you don't read about that. Um So. The moral of that story, I guess is you're not gross. If you get an infection from getting a Brazilian. You don't need to get a Brazilian. Just get a good razor, like get a men's razor, and shave your pussy hair like with with the direction of the hair, not against it,

with it, and then get tend skin. Tend skin if you are prone to um ingrown hairs, and use that after you shave, and you should be that should be able to be avoiding stuff. And if you do get into grows. Just grow your pussy hair out, Like, who gives a fuck? Um, let's see. Julia Roberts reveals Martin Luther King Jr. Paid the hospital bill for her birth.

What in the fucking fuck? Roberts said her parents were close friends with the civil rights activists and his wife whose children joined the theaters their theater school, and we're targeted as a result. Okay, well that is a headline you would never think happens. One day, Credit called my mother and asked if her kids could be a part of the school because they were having a hard time finding a place that would accept your kids. My mom

was like, sure, come on over. Who knows Julia roberts parents had a shop, They ran the Actor and Writer's workshop in Atlanta before she was born, and segregation made it so that the kid the kill klux Land blew up a car outside the school. I don't know. I'm gonna guess I'm just reading all over this thing. Um. Yeah, uh, in the sixties, you didn't have little black children interacting with little white kids in enacting school, and your parents were like, come on in. King marveled and responds to

Robert's story. I think that's extraordinary and in sort of laved the groundwork for who you are. Oh, I guess Gail King? Did she was she talking to? Yeah? Well, I'm not very good at the news I but I am reading from an article and trying to paraphrase as I go. So. Um, I've heard uh, not great things about a person mentioned in that story that I guess I don't want to be specific, but I've heard stories that that person is pretty out of touch? Do I do?

I have them? Um? Firsthand? Yes, firsthand from someone who saw this person act a fool. And I think if you know, if you go on enough, if you read enough about I sometimes forget what I know about celebrities because I've friends with people who know stuff that have told or stuff that I've just read online. But I don't think Julia Roberts is the coolest person from what I remember reading. I'm sure everyone who works with her

fucking loves her. And I'm sure one day when I have a talk show and she comes on, I will eat my words and this will come back to haunt me. I stand to be proven wrong. And you know what I also say, whenever someone has a bad story about a celebrity. It's often because they've been hounded so much in their annoyed and maybe they are on vocal rest. I realized that the other night. I think so many singers are on vocal rest and they come off as

being so rude and quiet. Two people that work venues or like you know, bands that open for them, and they think that the person is rude, but they're just on vocal rest. They're trying to say their voices. So maybe that could be. I don't know, but that's just what I when I've heard, And I'm not going to give specific stories, but there is a great story I remember of just not her being rude, but just being a little bit out of touch, where you're like, okay,

let's see what else we got here. Marjorie Taylor Green's saying Pelosi deserves death resurfaces after attack. Um, of course that is out there, that fucking woman. And every time I see Marjorie Taylor Green's face on anything, I think it's me for a second. That is a horrible person to look like, I'll tell you. And every day it gets closer and closer that she's not listen. If she were a nice person, if she had she had the Kelly Clarkson type kindness, we would be like, she's beautiful.

But because she's such an ugly, foul, horrible person that just says the cruelest, the dumbest, cruelest things. Didn't she think gaspacho? Was she called like the Gestapo the gaspacho. She's just like that all the time. She's a true idiot because she's such a bad person. She's ugly to me because she's an ugly person, so I don't want to look like her. But if she were like a Meryl Streep type, like warmth to her or like had that kind of soul, we would all think she's beautiful.

So she's not like a and you know, objectively bad person to look like. I wouldn't mind aging into someone that looks like her, But because she's so awful, I just hate looking like her. That makes sense. Moving on, Let's take a quick break and come back with more after this. How about that. I think that's a good idea. We're back. Oh my god, I know what I want

to talk about more than anything. Holy sh it. Okay, So today they announced that they arrested a man in connection with these murders that I have been following since they happened. I don't know if you guys remember the Delphi murders. This is not turning into a murder podcast, like we tried to do that one day and when we were in Cabo filming Perfect Strangers too. That's not happening. But I am so fucking excited. I mean excited the

wrong word. I'm relieved. I just feel a sense of closure and I can't even imagine how the people, um you know, close to this murder feel. Um So, two girls in two seventeen, Libby German and Abigail Williams, fourteen and thirteen, respectively, were killed in two thousand and seventeen.

They were it was like a day where they either didn't have school or they got off school early or something, and their parents, their mom, one of their moms, took them to the park and they were like on these like old abandoned train tracks at this um at this trail and the part that fascinates me about this, and then they were murdered. And we have no details about their murder, but they were found I think a day

or so later. I don't know the exact um uh you know, timeline, but because everything around this has been very it's been very kept hush hush, except they released a photo of the guys. So these girls, Oh my god, it's giving me chills just thinking about these poor sweet girls. They before they were murdered, they said that this man was following them and they started filming him on Snapchat. And so there's a photo of Libby or one of the victims um walking on the train tracks. And then

they took video of this man. They didn't release the video because apparently it gets kind of disturbing. He's either like you know, it's it gets ominous. Um. Apparently no violence is captured on the video, but they record. These girls are so smart, they recorded him. So they got a picture of him, and it's the spookiest fucking picture you've ever seen. If you've never seen it, just type in Delphi d E l p h I murders picture man on tracks, Man on tracks. And that's the only

picture that they released to him. And they released some composite sketches that from UM. One girl who I guess I saw a man either before or after, and a young girl who was on a park bench and she saw a man walk by and he like gave her a weird look, and she said hi to him because he was kind of staring at her, I guess, and

then he gave her a weird, gross look. Um. So anyway, this is a headlining, ring chilling photo uploaded to Facebook a year after Delphie murders shows arrested man's daughter twenty eight posed in the same spot where Oh my god, so this guy. So the guy that is arrested is named, oh, Richard Allen. He worked at a CVS as a technician. Now, these guys, no one, there's been no information about this, like,

no leads. I thought that we were never going to catch this guy, this disgusting man who's just out there. I mean, this creeped me out. I'm on Subreddit's about these murders, like I I don't know why they've been fascinating me. It's that creepy picture. Oh and there's also audio of him. So they captured his voice too, So the police obviously have a recording of his voice and whatever happened, and they didn't release the whole thing, but they have him going down the hill, down the hill,

and it's so fucking creepy. I don't it's giving me chills just thinking about So they have this creepys photo and then they have them saying down the hill. And there have been times where Andrew is like sometimes dressed like this and I go, you look at the man on the tracks, and he doesn't know what I'm talking about, but this is what I'm talking about, this man on

the tracks. It is such a creepy photo. So finally, this was two seventeen, you guys they found So the girl's bloody bodies were found about a half mile from the bridge. Alan was arrested on Friday and connection into the murder is the first big break in the case. Oh and so this just came out that his daughter they you know, now they're investing. Now we have his name and all these internet sluices are pulling pictures of

his family. And this girl posed a year later. She posed on the same tracks where these girls were murdered, where her dad murdered allegedly, not even allegedly. There's gonna be a press conference tomorrow, which is today and Monday, and um, I really I'm just so excited, not excited, but I'm so happy for these families who finally have relief. So it says after the news of Alan's arrest broken Friday, another disturbing photo. Oh man, this is crazy. Another disturbing

photo of the man um began to circulate. The shot showed Alan, which is this the guy smiling with his wife while in the background over his shoulder. I'm getting chills again, literal goose bumps everywhere, mere feet away a police sketch over his shoulder of the Delphi murder suspect. So a police sketch of him is over his shoulder in a photo. I am getting creeped out. I'm alone in my apartment right now, and I'm getting creeped out. Um. Since Allan's arrested, it was also revealed that his home

was less than two miles from the Delphi train bridge. Well, everyone was saying it was like a drifter that did this, and like it couldn't be a local. But um, But then I was reading some stuff on Reddit today and they're like, the way he walked on that bridge, it just looked like he'd been there before. And it's like, now, now that you see what the guy looks like, and then you see the photo, you go, oh my god,

of course he has a gray beard. You see things in the photo that you wouldn't have noticed without the details that you now know. You're like, oh my god, there this photo has so much in it. Just the way he's walking, like you kind of see like this isn't a guy that's like like worried about walking on these weird kind of train tracks. He looks like he's

been there before. So yeah, it's just so fascinating anyway. Um. Indiana State Police said in February they knew who killed the girls, but that they had insufficient evidence to make an arrest. Is unclear whether they were I don't remember. That is unclear whether they were referring to Alan or not. The rest of Allen could be the end of a year's long investigation, during which numerous possible leads have led nowhere. Um. Yeah, exactly how the girl's died remains unknown to the public.

So yeah, Oh well, I don't want to read this, but I will. I'm sorry if this is disturbing to some of you, but maybe some of you are interested in it. I don't, man, this is like really given me the Willie's. Over the summer, the details of a search warrant revealed that Libby and Abigail were found covered in blood. Another killer appeared to have taken a souvenir of some kind. Okay, this motherfucker. And if you guys look at this photo of this guy, look look him up.

That is psychopath eyes. I read this book called Diary of a Psychopath, I think, and even that talks about how this woman like wrote the book and now she's revealed who she is. Let me just find the book so you guys know exactly what I'm talking about. It's so good. She just talks about being a psychopath. That's like written by a woman that is a psychopath. Um. And well, of course not showing up on this fucking thing. Um. But anyway, if you look, psychopaths have like these weird piercing,

like kind of dead eyes. And this guy has those eyes. I'm telling you, go look at a photo of him. They're just they're like shark eyes. And even when he's smiling. There there's like there's this one where he's with his wife. There's a selfie. They both have sunglasses on their hats. Go find that photo and you tell me that guy does not stare. It's boring a hole through my head. I'm dead. This guy's eyes are the creepiest eyes I've

ever seen. If I met a guy who was my CVS um, you know, pharmacyc technician giving me my antibiotics for my flaming enraged, you know, bacterial infected pussy, And though I saw those eyes, I would say, no thanks. I'd rather die from an infection than even like then give you my CVS number and have you hand me my long receipt. It's terrifying. Oh my god, I'm like zooming in on it. I hate him so much. Anyway,

I'm just so relieved by that. Um I've always that was just something that it was always in the back of my head, like I can't wait till that guy gets caught. And this morning I was sitting at my gate next to Anya and we had just showed her David Pumpkins. Do you guys know that sketch from SNL? They really They read it last night with Jack Harlow. It was with Tom Hanks. It's so funny. Watched the

original David Pumpkins sketch. It's so random. You can tell us tell this was like a sketch that was like last minute, and they were like, what is this? I mean, a lot of goes into the production of it, but it was just kind of like, I don't think they realized it was going to be such a hit, but I remember it like I saw it air the first time, and I was obsessed and I'm so glad that it became a cult hit. But I was showing Onya David Pumpkins and we were laughing, and then all of a sudden,

I pulled up Daily Mail because I wanted to see. Man, I'm a morbid bitch. Okay. I was pulling up the Daily Mail because they always have like the most disturbing kind of pictures, and um, they don't. They're not scared to like get in there and really invade people's space and just show you things that you know you shouldn't see. And I was trying to see about this thing that, you know, the crowd crush that happened. I saw some footage of it and it was just horrifying. And I

don't like video, but I don't mind images. I'm such a weirdo. I'm not the only one. I am not the only one. I mean, there there are tons of gore sites. People love this stuff and I don't. It's not like I like to see people hurt. It's so distressing to me, but it's like it gives I guess that's the same reason people like horror movies, which I don't understand, or like redecorating their kitchens. What I don't understand. It gives you a thrill and it gets it sends

something off in my body. But I don't like it. Um but I do, but I don't. Um. So, I was trying to look up pictures from that. I am so sad about that crowd crush. I can't even believe, you know, just how scary that must have been for them. How and the fact that they're all dressed up. There's something about wearing Halloween costumes when you die that is so much more tragic and just like ironic. And um,

I don't know. I hit a garbageman with my car when I was sixteen and my friend Taylor and I Taylor, you know from the show the Hobo Hopping, Uh, you know train hop and Hobo. She and I were driving and I was driving my mom's SUV and I hit a garbageman that jumped out from a car and I didn't see him. And um, I went to court for it, like he sued me four years later. I mean, it was a whole fucking thing and he got he got

really hurt. It was fucked up, and it was really sad and traumatic for obviously him and me as well. But we were dressed in a's outfit. We were dress in costumes because there was a basketball game later that night. We were on the PEP squad, So we went to her at her mom's house, like raiding her closet, getting all this, like you know, suddenly Seeking Susan is that

the movie? We looked like Madonna in the eighties, like red lips and crazy frizzy hair and just like crazy Neon outfits, and it just made it that much weirder that I remember just looking over at Taylor with her like frizzy hair and just um mom jeans. I mean we're probably dressed like we dressed now, like just tight jeans pulled all the way up like mom style, um big blouses, and it just made it so much more

surreal that we were dressed up. But if you saw any of the pictures from this weekend, I mean all these young kids just were going out in EATA one, which is the cool part of town. I don't understand, though, why people like to go to things like that. I didn't like it in my twenties. I'm not victim blaming. I just don't understand. Final thought, I don't like crowds. And now that there's a thing called a crowd crush that I knew about, but I didn't know it was

called a crowd crush. I mean, we saw it happened at Astro World, it happened at a Who concert in the seventies that my mom was out in Cincinnati. That was like the original one. I mean there were once before that. I was on a Wikipedia the other day looking up crowd crushes. That sounds like something I'd want to have. By the way, it's like, I have a crush, was in a crowd and we're gonna lock eyes across the room. It sounds like something romantic. It sounds like

a scene in West Side Story. My crowd crushed. But um, I read a Wikipedia of all the crowd crushes that have happened in history. Dude, there's one that happened in like ancient times. It was five thousand people died. There was one that happened um in two thousand ten where like two thousand people died. A lot of them happened from religious um what is it called when they pilgrimages. They happened a lot in those, but and a lot

happened from fires. Someone else fired, then everyone starts running. I did hear reports that the one in et One, the one that happened in um Soul this weekend, was like five guys were just pushing from one side. Just five people caused a hundred and fifty something people to die.

If I was a victim, I would be really annoyed that I don't know the exact number and I was just like something but I think it was a hundred six last time I checked, and then it went high there um anyway, crowd crises are terrifying and I hate crowds. I I will not go to a restaurant if there is a line out front, and not because I don't like crowds. I don't like anything that is too popular, and not because I'm could. I don't know why say like that, but not because I'm care and like I'm

trying to like, I'm just different. I want to try out things that are like no one's into. I just feel like a dumb tourist when I do anything that's like too popular. Do you ever feel that way? I always feel like if I go to a brunch spot that has like a two hour wait. First of all, I hate waiting. You guys know that I told you

that in the beginning. I don't like waiting for anything, and so I like to plan everything so I get there and then it starts because waiting equals you might have time to feel your feelings, and you can't do that because then you don't want to start killing yourself, so or start shutting the funk up and uh hamdrop. So I will not go to a brunch spot that is a long wait. Chris, my boyfriend just knows that we if there's a place that has a weight, we will not wait for dinner. We will not wait. I

just don't want to do it. I don't. I feel like an idiot. I feel like I'm at the Chase Cake Factory and at the mall and Dighton. I just feel like a dumb pleab. I feel like a lemming. I feel like I'm at the eminem store in Times Square that I'm just like New York City. I just feel like you're just doing what everyone else is doing. And by the way, I do so many things that everyone else is doing. I want to be like everyone else. I want That's why I was sad the other day

that I wasn't redoing my kitchen. I'm like, I just want to be normal, but in that way, I don't want to be normal. Does that make sense? But man, I'm so scared of crowd crushes. Now. That's why I always when I'm at a place where I go, I genuinely look for fire exits. I look for a strategy in case there's a fire. I want a crowd crush. Um plan. I have plans of action for a lot of tragedies, and I don't have one for that. I was thinking yesterday. I was like, Okay, maybe I would

climb upon people. I would try to climb up, but then I would cause I would trample people and doing that and I want to kill anyone. So what is the plan? Um? I would try to do the thing that Andrew does if he slept with someone the day before and he sees them as sephora um the next day, and I would pretend I'm invisible and hope that I would disappear. Um. I don't. I just want to plan and a fire. I'm always like I have a plan.

I'm like standing by the exits um an earthquake. I know I'm gonna go to a doorway or a table. I'm not going to run outside. That's what people always do and trees fall over, buildings fall over, things, signs fall over. Don't run outside in an earthquake. Have a plan. Do I have a go bag? No? I don't have a go bag. Taylor was gonna make me one because she's the survivalist, and I was like, can you make me a vegan go bag? And she was like, I'll try, And so she's gonna make me a vegan go bag.

I'm gonna hire her to do that because I definitely need one, especially living in California. I'll probably just have a bag that I call a go bag that I go in that I take ships in because I just want to have a little portable toilet. So that's gonna be my go bag. Is a bag I just go in. Um. Yeah, I think this about rounds out the podcast. I feel good about this solo episode. I missed Andrew, I missed Noah for sure, but we got through it. I'm trying

to think if there's anything else I want to tell you. Guys, I am on tour and um, I hope you come see me. It was so much fun to perform this weekend. It was so I have new jokes. My parents and Anya and met my tour manager, were all like, holy sh it, your set is. I mean, I don't want to speak for them, but I will. I would never say this if it wasn't true. They were like, it's it's next level, Like there's we've never heard any of those jokes. This is like I felt really good about it.

Like after hearing their feedback, I really never know what to feel about my set. I'm always a little bit too critical and never really feel that great. But hearing their feedback, which they don't always say that to me, it meant something. So I hope, And and listening to the fans to like meeting people after the shows and

hearing them say what a great show it was. One guy said I was like, he was like, I saw Ginger Cookie last night or Ginger Boy some like guy some um comedian slash TikToker and he was like, your show is better. And then someone else said that they saw who they see. I love when people are like that was some someone told me I was the best comedy show they've ever seen, and they had a list of good comedy shows. So that meant something to me. So the reviews are in and they're great. So I

am going to be all over the place. And I told you about that before during the show, I think at some point, So, UM, come out and see me, and I hope you all have great days. I'm trying to think of anything else I need to tell you. Um, I'm gonna be traveling all tomorrow. We will see you on Tuesday. Getting my hair done Tuesday. I'm excited about that. Really, getting your roots done. I hate to say it makes

you feel better. Um. Oh, also I got told this weekend. Oh. So I was waiting, um, after my plane right to St. Louis. It landed and I had to check gate check, you know, at the side of the plane my guitar bag because it wouldn't fit in the overhead from Chicago to St. Louis. My layover to St. Louis, and so I was waiting in the hall waiting for them to bring out the luggage, and there was this guy that was like, I saw you with a guitar. Do you are you in a band?

What do you play? And I was like, oh no, I'm just a hobbyist. I'm not good. I was like, do you play guitar and he was like no, I wish and I was like, you are younger than me. Start playing, Like I don't think it's too late. I started playing two years ago. And he goes, you're younger than me and I was like yeah, dude, And I was like, if you're thirty, I was like thirty five, start playing. He's like You're not thirty five and I was like, I'm actually thirty eight and he was like,

no way. And this guy was not hitting on me, by the way. He had two kids with him. He was like, very mormony looking, but he was so nice of him to say that. I I've never been told I look young for my age, never ever in my life. Now I hear it told to other women all the time. And I'm not kidding you. I've never heard it. And that's okay, because thirty eight is not a bad age to look. But this guy made my fucking day that he had no way you're thirty five, and I go,

I'm actually thirty eight. I have a friend who looks literal decades younger than she is, and I was like, if I were you, I'd be telling my people my age all the time because people are shocked when they find out her age. You don't even know her age. And you might know who I'm talking about, but you don't even know her. Like you, you would be blown away someone you know is so much older than you think they are. And if it were me, she doesn't like to tell everyone. If it were me, I'd be

screaming it because she looks so fucking good. I mean literal decades. People think she's younger than me, and she is much older than I am. It's nuts. I hope to be that someday. I hope everyone thinks I'm thirty. I hope it stops now, not that it really matters, but I do remember the only time it happened to me where someone thought I was younger. Until today, There's been one other time, and I swear to God, and

it was DeMarcus where he's a footballer. I don't think that's what they call him when you play American football, but he plays. He was a football player. He on dancing with the Stars with me, and we were at the finale. And I probably told this before because it's so funny. We're at the finale and so we're back there just having been eliminated, but we're there to support the people that are still in the running, and we're sitting down during you know, the show was stopped down.

You guys know what that means now, because I told you before and he goes, I said something about my age. He goes, you're thirty four, and I was like yeah, and he's like, you're thirty four and I was like, ah. He was like, no way, are you thirty four? I go I am, and he was like, oh my god. Really I could have sworn you were thirty two. I mean, I was like, what the hell is the deference? It made me laughed so hard. I thought he was getting ready to be like twenty five or something like. You know,

but it's two years younger. And I'm like, I guess that is a major spot of your life where the age starts to clicking. If you are younger than me, which I know a lot of our listeners are, and you're wondering as a girl, when you're going to start to feel the effects of agent ing. I would say thirty five for me was when I started to see like my face kind of start to change in certain ways and start to see like wrinkles and stuff in

ways that you're like, oh, I started getting botox. I looked at it yesterday or I guess I just trying to figure out, like when did I start getting stuff done? And if you're wondering when should I get botox, listen, this is not me telling you to get stuff. In fact, I got filler about a month and a half ago, and I regret it, Like I I think I got too much in my cheeks, so I look a little bit crazy, But it's fine. I'm used to it now

and it's going to drain out of my face. That's a good thing about fillers that your body metabolizes it and eventually goes away. But um, I started getting botox, which I do recommend. I think it's great and I don't think it's like a sad thing for women to do. I don't think it's like you're gonna waste. It's not that expensive. I just think it should be looked at

as like dyeing your hair, not a big deal. But I started getting it when I was I'm gonna say it was two thousand seventeen, so I was thirty four. Thirty four, Yeah, thirty four was first time I got potox. So if you're looking for like a time when you should do it, not that that's the time to do it, I think I could have waited until now, to be honest with you, or ever, you don't ever need to do it. But I really was very clueless in my thirties. But when do you start to have to do this ship?

So if you're wondering anyway, I gotta go to bed. Thank you so much for listening to podcast today. Do Napuka and Jack carlm was okay on us and all