#208 Juggling Chainsaws

just drew things and then smarter people made him. I don't definitely came out after he died, you know what I'm saying. Oh the AirPod? Yeah, yeah, I mean I think he just tried to put a couple of nanos in his ears. One other thing, Nana's I kind of missed the circle thing where like that. Oh that was a very satisfying that little clicky click and the BlackBerry the sounds of the clicks. Oh yeah, the BlackBerry. I never,

I never did you had a BlackBerry before? Yeah? I mean I was doing real estate, so you know, right after I got the sidekick? Oh yeah, wait, the one that goes like like over, Oh no, that's the next step side I think you go flip. Yeah, when did you get your razor? Do you remember when you got a razor? I mean was seventh grade when I started shaving my legs. No, I never had a razor phone ever? What No, I never had one. I always I never had a flipbone. I don't think maybe once it had

like a little flip over it. It wasn't a flip where the voice part was in the flip. It was just covering. But you know what your first nine texting? Oh yeah, I remember my first phone. The the ring was doing no no no non in and I love that ring. I wish I could get back it was it was unique and no one else had it and I really liked it. Um, yeah, T nine, I love texting with T nine. Do you remember that? I don't

remember what is Tina? You know if you if I was writing, um, babe, I would do to to to get the A B. Then you wait a second and then you go to to to again to get B and then E would be three three. I mean the patients we had back then, I could do it so fast. Um. Do you ever do the thing where you kind of just like, uh, I don't even know you do? Like you on your keyboard? You don't hit them individually. You just kind of go, this is easier, like you like,

do I've never? I've never. And it's like the cursive of computer. Yes, can you do cursive? Yeah, I'm a cursive guy. I can't do a Z obviously or upper case too, but now you know how to do that. It's just a two, it's whatever. All I know is that I remember I had a cellphone college, and I would talk to my girlfriend at night for an extra like minutes over whatever the the amount was. And I just remember my dad being like, yeah, you we lost

our house. You're crying on the phone at night about apparently my divorce to your girlfriend, about your divorce to your girlfriend, or think tried to have her feel sorry for me so I could finally what a loss soul you were. I got to see your parents or your dad and your stepmom's house we were this weekend. We drove through on our way from Fort Lauderdale to Jacksonville,

drove through and stopped at your dad's house. Would you did you know that we were going to drive past it, like ten minutes away from it, because you just asked, like twenty minutes before we get there. You're like, oh, by the way, my dad lives to minutes. Wait, can we stop? Like were you scared to ask me a day before? Like why did you wait till the last second? I'm just really I wouldn't say I was kind of confused by that. I don't think I'm scared to ask you.

I just think that like one my dad's recovered from hip surgery to I'm recovering from COVID three. I just thought we didn't really necessarily going to have time. I didn't know what time we were going to leave in the morning. You know, it's a long drive to Jacksonville. Um, so I guess all those things included. I just didn't think that I would stop. And then also I didn't

know how long we would stop. And so then when we just like we got close, you were just feeling it and you were like, oh, this could actually work, and that's why you up that. Yeah, I was like I knew how excited he'd be. Yes, he was so excited. He was touched. Um he got tear guy. Yeah, it was nice. It was you know he uh, we don't get I don't get that there that often. Does he really have a farm? It was like a petting zoo. No, it was wild. Andrew didn't tell me that before we stopped.

He was just like, you want to go to Like, I'm I love Andrew's family, I just don't I don't like like touring homes. I just don't care. I just don't care about homes. His home was actually and I thought their estate was going to be so big that I would have to like see everything, like it would be just like it would take it would be like touring Graceland, Like I would need like, you know, an audio like system to put on them that would take

me through a tour of it. But it was really like it was minimal in a beautiful way, and it was actually really fun to see inside. But I um, if you would have told me there were goats and a donkey, I would have been like, yeah, please, let's go. I'm dying. I mean, is more important than the donkey. But the donkey is someone's parents, no offense. Your your parents are great, so are my parents. But no one ever wants to see parents. Can we just be like

Noah wanting to see my parents in Arizona? Really, Like, I just don't understand it. I don't care who your parents are I would rather not see your parents? Is that rude to say? Yeah? Of course? Why? Literally? No, it's different because I see my parents once every two years. You see your parents once every two days. Like there's a difference. If I'm driving back, if imagine, imagine, imagine, I'm not saying for you, we stopped because I you do need to see your parents. And I didn't realize that,

I thought. But the thing is, if it was that important to you, why didn't you fit it in and ask us sooner? Like that's what That's why. I was kind of like, if this is so important, why is it coming up? Like can we stop at this rest stop to go to the bathroom? Like it was literally sooner than I usually asked to stop for Starbucks that maybe maybe maybe there was part of me that was like, well, if I put it on her last second, she'll be more inclined to do it than then dreaded three days

ahead of Okay, I got you, you got worked. No, I didn't maulate you, No, I really, but it is I mean, like, I'm not a cruel if you go, literally said Nikki, you said, when I go, do you want to stop? You said, I'd rather not stop. But if we're gonna stop, we could stop. You literally said that because I wasn't lying to you, Andrew, I would rather know. But so then I'm not crazy that say no, but I'm allowed to say no. I understand that. But

I'm telling you why these reactions are happening. I get it, Andrew, but that reaction wasn't mean. It was just like you asked me, can't do you? Do you want to? Could we stop? And I'd said, I said I'd rather not. But if it's if you want to, we can't? Why is that? Why is that I'm not saying it's me. I'm telling you though, that's that's that's the truth, that's the facts. Though, that's why you say that you can't

ask me till last second. But like, why if you would have asked me before I could say, you know, I'd rather not and then you can go, which you which I realized without you said sing, was this is important to me. I don't get to see my dad. I would do you think I'm that cruel that I would go, Oh my god, we're I didn't know we were gonna be ten minutes away from your dad. I literally you never said that even once the whole thing.

I don't know what Florida is, so I never knew that if you would have said to me on Wednesday, Hey, on our way from Fort Lauderdale Jacksonville, we're going to literally drive by ten minutes away from my dad's. I haven't seen him in so long. I never make it down there. He just had hip surgery. There would be no doubt that I would have said yes to that, no doubt. But it doesn't the importance of it is

a factor in me saying yes. Because even though I don't want to see anyone's parents, when they when when my friend it matters to them to see their loved ones. That trumps any feeling I have. But it doesn't deny that I still don't want to see parents. That's ever. But also I'm not. I'm not a heartless like I don't know what you think I am. Like, I just don't understand. It hurts my feelings that you think that you saying because you know what happens is when you

asked me last minute, I think, well, he doesn't. This isn't that important to him because I haven't even heard about it. He's just it just occurred to him that his dad is, Like, it didn't seem important to me. It seems like an afterthought, So I'm more inclined to not want to go when you spring it on me last second, Like it's just like, oh, you know, I want to get a sandwich from this place we're driving by.

You know, yeah, I don't. I don't think Like there wasn't too much really like the whole manipulative thing that was kind of a joke, but like there wasn't too much thought put into it in the sense of like, oh, I'm gonna like try to get to stop. It was literally like, holy sh it, I am going by my dad's and it would be amazing to see him for ten minutes. And I guess we can do it because it's only eleven thirty. Like literally that was the thought.

Like it wasn't there wasn't more thought to it. There is. I mean, if I'm going to be completely honest, is thought to like like we're on the road for your stuff, like it's your show, it's your tour too for me to then go, well, I'm gonna make this about me and stop at my parents. I do feel a little reservation there because it's not my place to do that, and that has nothing to do with you as much as it is. It's just like, it's not my it's

not you know. I just think the adult and mature thing to do is would be to not wait for the last second because of I just think I just would encourage you to not wait, because of of you procrastinating that you're scared to ask me about something like it's That's not my fault that I respond. I'm not blaming you. I have a question for Andrew. Are you, in general like a last minute planner or do you enjoy spontaneity? But I know that Andrew had known that

we were driving. Best to say, I know that it was on his mind. This was I swear it wasn't. It wasn't. I swear to God, I swear in my life it was not on my mind. It was not on my mind to stop. I really wasn't thinking I was going to stop. Then that could have been what you said initially instead of I'm scared to ask you beforehand.

If it wasn't on your mind beforehand, what I'm saying when you brought it up, when you said, oh, then you were probably that probably is a percentage of my brain of why I thought not to stop, That's what I'm saying. I'm not saying that was the majority of it. I'm just saying I assumed you had thought of it before twenty minutes before. I really didn't. I really hadn't. I really had it, and partly yeah and partly, but yes, Okay, you don't think it occurred to you, because I get it.

But there were goats and there was a donkey, and I don't even know why. It's don't either. I still don't know why. My my dad's a Jewish guy from like from when did he get the goats? Huh? I think they came with my stepfamily. I don't. I don't. I don't know. I don't know how we have goats. I don't. My stepbrother takes here, my stepbrother, Jake, he built a farm five four or five goats and then one donkey that they just got. That The donkey is kind of you can just tell, doesn't know if it's

supposed to be a goat. There's no other donkeys around it, and you're just like, where do you get a donkey from? Like craigslist. It's just I don't but it was so cute. They were so cute and they were they just you know, they only care about food. They're not like wanting to get pets or anything like that. It's just it's interesting to see animals that just have no motivation for like affection, Unlike you know, the dog Otis and then the other dog Bella. Is that it. Those two dogs are so cute.

They're just like dogs. Dogs love pets, like that's treats to them. A lot of times they say you can train your dog just by and you don't have to give him a treat. You can just like go the gut boy, and they that's enough for them to be like, oh I want to do that, I want to sit again, or I want to stay. But um, yeah, I just feel bad when goats they come up to you and you want them to come to you, so you kind of pretend you have food. But it's such a trick

and I feel bad. Yeah. The goat they really they their their eyes are really on the side of their head there, I know, you know what I mean. Like I thought, like a goat, if you were in front of a goat, they'd have no idea, like you could really stand right in front of if you're really skinny, and they'd have no idea the same way. Right, Yeah, I guess there's no cross eyed goats. I'll tell you that because they're all side eyed. It's I love that your step mom was like, get on the donkey, don't

actually don't, but just straddle. It will be fun. And I was like I would. But I also got bit by a camel that was told a guy told me to kiss it. That seemed to know what he was talking about. So I wasn't gonna trust your step mom about the donkey. That's a good point. I wouldn't trust her either. But my dad, you know, my dad wanted to horses this whole. I think that was a big, big disconnect. My mom is like a Jewish American princess

from Chicago, like city girl. Definitely didn't want to own horses and pick up poor ship, and I think my dad always wanted that. I think that was a disconnect in their relationship, you know. And now he finally has his farm with his side eye goats, and it's it's so much work. You're right, I'm with your mom. Like I was thinking about pools and like I was reading someone on Reddit was talking about like what's something you buy that you like seems better than when you get

it in a pool because it takes so much maintenance. Um, and I would absolutely let my pool go to ship. Like I just that's just a part of my personality that I don't have, is like maintaining things and taking care of things. And like today I was on my WhatsApp chat with my friends and they were talking about building. My friend Robin just built her house, and you know, everyone's like, oh my god, that's a so fun you're building your house. And I was like, I've never felt

more disconnected from my fellow man than this conversation. There's nothing more I would hate than building a house and like planning where to put things and picking out fabrics and wallpapers. I I don't like. I don't like it. I wish I wish that was a fabric of my personality.

It's just such a weird thing too. There's so many things I wish I liked, like even your your step mom knowing how to like feed like even Jake, Like want your your stepbrother who like takes care of those animals, like that's a huge responsibility, or like tunding the land or like fixing things or you know, I don't know.

I'm just I'm just someone who wants You're not like that either, too, though you don't really like No, I those would be that in three days, like I would, they would have drowned in the pool that I don't Yeah, cat, Thank God for a cat. And they're easier than like vicuses. They really are pretty simple animals. Yeah, I'm the same way as you. I You know what happens is you build a house that just all these things take too long. They just you know, and every day it's like, oh,

I get to make a new decision. No, that's what sucks. You just want decisions made for me. I mean yeah, I mean, look, I bought a condo when I was twenty five. It had bunk beds already in it, Like, it was already furnished and had two sets of bunk beds in it. I didn't even want them in there, but I was just like, I'd rather have that, did not then pick a bed. You know, I don't cooking. I mean I I can't. I just I would rather.

I don't understand. If you can afford take out and you don't have a problem getting it why cooking, like cooking takes so long, and I just it's that's ridiculous to say, but it just don't. It's I don't. Do you think it could be meditative for you? Like I mean, these things, I guess are you know people do them to relax, you know. When I want to relax, I shut my eyes and put a sleep mask on and listen to a SMR like that. That's not like, that's where I really have. I struggle when people are like,

you need a day off. But all my friends, and I've said this before, they filled their days off with meal prep and cleaning their house and making you know, fall pots or you know, cleaning the gutters like and they enjoy this stuff, and I just that to me. The day off to me is just I want to sleep all day. Yesterday got into Nashville on Sunday. We had a maybe have at four thirty for six am flight, got into Nashville by our flight was delayed, but by

like eleven thirty. I slept all day long, all day long, and I loved it. It was the It's my favorite thing to do, I really, and it's were done with this podcast today I am getting I'm sleeping until I have to do a set tonight. And I'm in New York City, and I resented that. When I checked into my hotel today, the room wasn't ready and I'd wait two hours because I was going to take a two hours, like I wanted to get this done so I could

just nap. What did you do for two hours? And when got my nails done and got back massage that was honestly the best sack massage I've had in my whole life. I was in a chair, bent over and my it was getting my nails done, sitting like this with my The woman was doing my nails. This guy, Jerry was doing my back. It was the greatest back was that he The thing that I loved most is he held one hand like steady on my back, like almost nurturing, and then did the other one, so it

was always like two hands. It was great pressure. I got twenty minutes the time I went off and I go again again. He goes, what about ten more? And I'm like, okay, so I only got thirty minutes, but he was I I was like, I almost started crying. It was like that emotional for me, like it was just so connected I don't even know how to describe it. It was. It was awesome. I honestly might go back there after this instead of taking a nap. It was that good. Let's take a quick break and come back

with more show after this. Andrew, Hey, we're back. We had such a crazy weekend. Let's talk about it. Thursday, New Orleans, Friday, Lauderdale. UH. Saturday, drove to Jacksonville for a Sunday morning, flew to Nashville. UH. And then today this morning, flew out of Nashville, Andrew went to St. Louis, I went to New York. Um, I'm on the Today Show tomorrow. That's that's a sentence. Yesterday, and and I'm on the Tonight Show. Never Uh, I was supposed to

do the Night Show and now it's not happening. So if I said that last week, I apologize. Do you feel like you're more emotional in that chair because we just did all that stuff? I feel like an maybe earlier in the show that I came off maybe a little too emotional. Like I feel like I'm I'm in

a pretty like emotional state right now. I don't know what's going on with my brain, but yeah, do you think maybe that's why you're maybe crying in a chair almost possibly like just tiredness and um defensive lists defensive listeness in terms of like you can't um. I think I just was craving like a release or like someone giving a funk about my pain. I guess like I just really felt like he felt my pain, if that makes sense, Like he was just like perfectly finding this

acknowledged it. Yeah, feeling like knowledge your pain. Yeah, because he knew where it was. Like he wasn't even like you're really tight, you know, like sometimes Masusa is going to give you that feeling you need of like validating how tight you are or whatever. But it wasn't that. It was like just just because he knew where it was, it was like okay, like it was just and it was like a release away. And so I think that's why. And I just like, yeah, I think I'm just like exhausted,

and yeah, this weekend was a lot. I had so much fun. Last night was a little much, but the parents, because my parents were there, my boyfriend was there. My boyfriend's brother opened UM for me, and um, he brought his wife and his kid and I just and they were all lovely. But and that was like no problem

at all. It was more like there was a festival going on, and so there were a lot of people backstage to like meet me before the show and like talk to me and be like, and I know a lot of people in Nashville, so they had backstage passes. I didn't even know those people would even be backstage.

And I get back there and it's just like a lot of people to say hello to, and I just kind of before the shows, I just like to hang with my family and friends and you know, put on my makeup and kind of just like relaxed and not have to be like hi, oh my god, yes, oh cool.

Like it's just I just want to get into a like very honest place before I go on stage instead of like, oh my god, so good to see, Like, yes, that is all honest, because and I was honest with like I was honest when I after I said my hellos, I shut my door to be like no more. But um, you know you just like you. It's just a lot. It's a lot. But I love having me, I told Andrew this morning, like having my parents there and like how it affects my set and how it affects me.

Taking care of them before and after and kind of like being distracted by that is worth it because of like how much fun they have, Like anything that could go wrong would still make it worth it. Yeah, your dad being such a music geek. What a geek he is? He's a funny word. Make a funny word if you had music too, It makes it kind of cool, Like he's a music geek, but does geek Your dad's a fucking geek. So like he loves he loved the Ryan the Rheman he you know, the Rheman Theater was there

since eighteen nineties. It's like classic, like everyone's performed there. Things like pews, it's like church pews. Uh. Yeah, your dad loved the history of it. You know the fossils in there. Yes, my dad loves fossils. He is one um And yeah it was that was great. Like I love when I can bring my parents along for these things and no matter what would happen, like I'm always going to be like, no, it was worth it because

they got to have fun. But it does not. I for the first time, not for the first time, but I really realized that, Like I after doing three shows like you know, uh, New Orleans, Fort Lauderdale, and Jacksonville, where I felt completely free. There was no one's I was worried about, no one who I was like, oh my god, they you're this joke. They might be uncomfortable

or mad or anything. Like when you're juggling all those feelings, which I I do just try to do a sincere set when my parents and my boyfriend and my boyfriend's family is there. But it's it's a little impossible to do to not be because when you do the jokes that you're like, I'm going to do these anyway, even if it makes them uncomfortable, there's still your brain is like fighting it and you're aware of it, and you're you have a nervousness about it that is not there otherwise.

Like Nashville was my shakiest show of the and it should have been my best because it was at the end of this run where I had like worked out stuff, But it was my shakiest show because I was just I talked to Chris afterwards because I was like just talking about some of my bits and I was like that was I was like, it was like I was juggling chain toss, like I was just it was in

my head. I was there was moments where I was present and had a really good time, but then I just like I became overwhelmed with not wanting to get off stage because I didn't want to face people. Who is when you get off stage, it's so awkward for people. They don't know what to say, they don't say the right thing. Um, you don't know if you've upset them

in some way, you made them feel awkward. I just want to make everyone feel comfortable, so I like kind of just run past them so they don't have to say anything because I don't want them to, like if they hated the show to like have to be nice. Um. And I just was. I was totally in my head. And then I had to go to the meet and greet. Was amazing because there were so many besties that made me feel so much better about everything, because I just I thought I hadn't done a good job, but people

were saying otherwise, so I felt great about it. That was That's the best part about the meet and greets is that you get to hear from the audience who aren't your family, who aren't your friends, who just have an objective experience as an audience and they're not on the side stage, and they're like they don't they don't have anything to compare it to, whereas my parents are like, well, the last time we tell you, we like to have one joke better, it's just no just and seeing you

live when you don't see like how do I put like I remember seeing you at Carolines perform, you know, years ago, like first time I think I ever saw you perform, and I remember you doing like the Friday Night Light's joke and like whatever, and I'm just like

mesmerized by you on stage. And not to say that I still not in awe of like how talented you are, but you know, you just you get used to seeing things like so so, but when you're talking to these people that you know are are there to see you once every two they're like, you know, it's a it's a big thing, like so it doesn't feel like a certain amount of time or or that joke doesn't sound like a certain thing. You know. I don't want to ever treat me differently, but I do, Like my mom

always is like I cannot believe you did that. You're amazing, But my mom's more commenting. I think on the fact that like I do so much as opposed to like the level of talent that I have. It's like, like, I it's almost like you, I walked a marathon. That's like my mom's like, I can't believe you walked, And I'm like, but mom, it's that That's more of it is like the impressiveness of like the amount. And you know, moms are always going to give you the compliments that

aren't exactly what you want to hear. But I do know that they think I'm talented, but you're right, and just like some of that gets lost after repetition, and but I am grateful that my family was there. And uh, I have a boyfriend who is able to tolerate the kind of mouth that I have on stage and the

things I talk about like it. As someone who has dated people for years and years being the comedian that I am, it is not easy to find someone that is comfortable with they're having their girlfriend talk really brazenly and openly about not only their current sex life and opinions about men and relationships, but like past and like, it's it is not easy. And I'm like, and I know that there are a lot of guys are like, I would do it, Nikki, because I get those, but

it's like, you don't know what it's like. You think you would want to you don't know. I don't think I would be able to handle it honestly, like, um, So it just made me appreciative last night that I even have a even though I get nervous doing comedy in front of my boyfriend because I'm just like, I don't want to say something that makes him feel awkward or grossed out or just or like disappointing that you can't have a governor like that, especially the kind of comedy. No, No,

I'm not saying it's his fault. I'm just saying, like you know, I mean, it's no one's father than like I don't know, it's me I have to like because he doesn't. But he's allowed to get disappointed in something I say or like or be like that could have been better. Like he's allowed to do that, and I have to be able to be Okay. He's pro time to them again that even if he does get upset, it doesn't mean he's going to break up with me.

Like I think it goes back to you confronting me about wanting to visit your parents, like you asking me and me saying no. That could happen. I could ask Chris did you like the show? And he could say no, Or he could go to my show and he could say no, I didn't like it. That doesn't change that he loves me, that he's not gonna leave me. I'm

not gonna fire you. I'm not gonna you know, like, just because you don't get the response you want from the people who love you doesn't mean I always go to It means if I say the wrong thing on stage, it means he's gonna break up with me, Like it could lead to that. I just go, I follow it, and I just He's allowed to still get mad, he's allowed to still get disappointed, he's allowed to judge my act. Like he has feelings, he can't shut them off. I am allowed to um get upset about his feelings too,

because I can't shut those off. But I have to acknowledge that he's allowed to have his feelings. I'm allowed to have mine, you know. Talking about my set last night, it was like difficult for me because I was I just was like getting defensive. But then I was like, this doesn't. It doesn't. I tried my best, and I think that's just like always a good thing to remember whenever, because I've been spiraling about my set last night, not just in terms of like my parents were there and

Chris was there. It was like just I didn't give a good enough show to the audience. I lost it. At one point. I got it back, but I just felt like it was like not as good as the Rhyman deserved. Even though I would have given it an A minus, I was doing a plus is all weekend. I was just like, oh, and you know, even though the bulk of it was, there were a couple of places where I'm like, oh, that was a c And I can't stop going back to those places, like I

keep revisiting them my whole flight. I'm just like going back to that line. They keep just jumping in my head, and I kept telling myself stop in the moment. You were doing the best you could, Like, you didn't mean to hurt anyone. You didn't mean to be lazy and not really do that joke as well as you could have. You didn't mean to funk up the order like that would be insane if you meant to do any of

those things, like you did your literal best. There's nothing you could have done differently, Like there's there was no intention there than doing my best, and my best just wasn't what I wanted my best to be. And I just have to accept it, and it's okay, it's not fucking it's not the end of the world. And that I that got me through it. And then I've now I've released it. It really but it kept haunting me

all last night, all today this morning. But then I was just like, wait a second, did you want to offend anyone? Did you want to do a bad job? Did you want to make these people pay money to see you have a couple of jokes that didn't do well? No, that's insane. Why would I want that? I tried my best. Who cares? Let it go? So I just have to, Okay, let it go, go back to the massage guy, get

it one more bit out of your neck. Thank god, I'm going on stage tonight the seller because now I can reset and have you know, you're only as good as your last one. But maybe that, yeah, maybe that's why I was almost crying at the massage place, because I was just feeling guilt and all these feelings of like what am I even doing? You know, you just have those moments where you're just like, I'm so tired

of listening to my own fucking voice too. I mean, I am like, you get it, Like I feel bad that people who love me I have to steal that I have to do this podcast with you. I'm like, and is probably so sick of hearing me talk like I just don't want to hear it. But I have so much I have like nine podcasts to do tomorrow. So and I know people are sick of me every time I look on like any post that emakes there like shut up, we get it? Who is she? We don't care? And I'm like, I don't want to do

any of that. Let's get to the heart. Oh man, it's Monday, folks. You know what that means. It is Monday. I hope you're having all the swells out there, uh in you know, your heart and your soul, in your in your lymph notes. You know you have a lot of lymph notes. I didn't know that armpits so many. Here um your thighs like next year? You know, you know when you get when you get mono, you could feel more. Yeah, they all get like swollen, you have every moo. Oh yeah, I got mono from my first kiss.

Ironically enough, it was me, the guy that I kissed, and his girlfriend. I didn't know you had a girlfriend. The three of us that had mono. After spring break, She's like, did you fund that girl with the lymph nodes that are big? I was so tired. It kind of feels like, right now, I think i'd still have it. That's how I feel right now too. I had mono in a fraternity house. It was terrible. But anyways, alright

to the news. No, uh yeah, So I found this article interesting because it's um celebrity friendships that have like really large age gaps. Oh so did you know that Tony Bennett. Sorry, yes, that's like the widest age gap. Jennifer Aniston, who is? And she is friends? She was in friends, That's all I wanted to say. She's been friends with the Rock surprised. Okay nine year old Selena Gomez. Oh yeah, okay, they both prized still drink some wine and laugh and stuff. I can see them being friends.

I think that Jennifer Branson can go young. She's so like she's such an idol for even you know, with the release of Friends on Netflix, like every generation wants to be friends with her. Um, yeah, that's not too bad, but yeah I can what is Jenner Branson is probably fifty one, she's fifty three and Selena's twenty nine, and she called her a little cherub, a little cherub. Okay, that's yeah, she is a little cherub. Anya said that she can't watch Murders in the Building because Selena's Gomez.

His voice is so weird in that show. I don't know what it's like. I haven't seen it. I hear it's a good show, but I just want to say that if anyone has noticed that. And he was like, I literally can't listen to it because her voice is so weird. It's like, I don't even know what it's like, but I'm guessing it's like I don't know, like Kermit, like went to boarding school. Oh God, what the funk is that? There's some I'm in this old hell haunted.

Oh someone's ringing my doorbell? One second? What is this? This looks like a murder Murders in the Building. It's so funny. We're talking the Selena Gomez murder. And now it's like, oh my god, I think it's a fire alarm for this old dumb building that I'm staying at, this haunted hotel. But it's like fire alarm itself, just a fire and stopped working. So I'm just gonna die soon.

And then Chelsea and then old hotel. It's a nice hotel, but it's like one where you have to open the door and then the elevator opens, and the elevator you can just tell how like small people's lives used to because elevators are so tiny. They had like a little brief case of clothing. The closets in New York City are just so small because girls had like three dresses and two sweaters. Um, like my suitcases does not fit in the elevator with me anyway. Um go on, okay,

let me read a couple of more. So, who do you think Stevie Nicks has a forty five year age difference? Harry Harry styles nice? Yes, I knew that one has the sun I never had. Oh that's sweet. He is so cute. Jesus christ Ellen, John's friends with thatcher And I know that John's friends with um Charlie Pooth too. I think he told Charlie Pooth that is first music was like shit, and like really insulted him one day, it was like your your stuff now is great. He

came up to him at a restaurant. That's how they became friends. Elton John loves new music. It's so cute. Elton John is on my list. Elton John was in Fort Lauderdale, you know, Jacksonville the night we were. He was on his farewell tour and I said on stage, I was like, thank you guys for not going to Elton John tonight. Never one laughed because like everyone in town was at Elton John. And I go was like,

it's you'll never see him again. It's his farewell tour, and you know it'll probably die at some point soon. And and then I was like talking about where the hotel I was staying at, and I kind of gave it away, and I was like, great, I'm gonna probably die. This is this is probably my farewell tour too. It's okay, okay, so Elton John and who. Elton John became friends with Eminem who's forty nine after a controversial two thousand and

one performance together. Oh yeah, they did stand Together, right. I wonder why it was controversial. Oh, because he maybe says the word in it. He doesn't say it in that song, but he says the word quite a lot before, and maybe that was controversial that Elton would like sing with him. Yeah, it turns out when you make you know, ten million dollars, you could look over the word. It's weird. It's weird. Yeah, I said a lot of things. God, I love him so much. I know, I really do.

He's so hot. Imagine m and M rapping and having like second thoughts about what his ex wife was thinking on the side stage, He's like, I buried her in a fucking I mean, you gotta admit, like when Brenna is watching you, there is a different there's a party for sure, firing off that wouldn't be if she wasn't there A million percent A million percent. Yeah, Oh I agree, I'm not. I'm as cool as eminem I'll tell you that. Who else it's age gap friends? Okay, how about Snoop Dogg,

who's fifty, Stewart who's eighty? Okay, that's I think once you get fifty though eight same. Yeah, and I don't think it's much as like they do a show together and they have to like act. So the average age of someone dying like a black male and a white female, it's actually, is that bad? I'm not, that's just honest. I'm not trying to be is that bad? I mean I think it's a stereotype. No, those are just like real numbers, if younger. Yeah, black men die at a

younger age and white female women live the longest. Oh god, all right, I guess we'll have to Yeah, okay, I guess that's a morbid though I don't know, Okay anyhow, No,

I maybe it's true. I mean I thought it was just like a stereotype from like they get like they die young because of like violet, you know, like stereotype like oh no, no, like of just disease, like heart disease, and like yeah, yeah, I mean I know that how little people die much younger than all of us because I used that as a burn when I was rat battling Brad Williams. I was like, I wanted to be as bitch as possible, so I was like, and the

fact that little people don't live is long. It's like you're not going to be a lot around a long time, like this is. It was such some really fucked up joke about how little people just don't live a long which is so fucking more, but but very true. Very tall people tall people too. Makes me sad. My dad's a tall man. Scared. Yeah he's not. Yeah he's tall,

he's not. He's one of those guys that's so healthy that he every time, he just seems like one of those guys that would be like he dropped dead and no one knows what he was, the epitome of healthy, you know what I mean? Like it's almost like I'm so scared that he's going to die because he just seems like guys like him that are healthy, that have no signs of anything. They're always like that. You're like, what what did he die of? He was like he

was like dunking yesterday. He has like you can't die with good abs, you know what. Okay, here's a quick story um for that made me think of Andrew. After after seven hundred golf balls, broken windows, dented sighting and gunshots sounding golf ball hits that turned their dream home into a nightmare, a family shoes the country club next door and wins almost five million dollars. What I mean, what's going on here? Five million dollars? They're suffering to

the keep the house? Um, well, the probably move, but they said that the past four years the family uh and their home that borders the country club's golf course was regularly attacked by balls from the courses fifteen hole. They didn't know when they bought the house that it was gonna be wondering for like the amount of money they're losing on having to sell this house early or

get up, you know what I mean? Also for like pain and suffering they have like children, and it's just you could get hit by a golf ball if you're just like outside, you know. It's that seems crazy that that either doesn't happen more often or that there aren't certain r Yeah, I mean, Andrew, do you ever see like there's there's so many homes that are in the line of way, Like it doesn't it. I don't know.

I'd have to know more about the story. But the idea that they think that there's so much pain and suffering that they deserve five million dollars is insanity. Unless they were on a golf course. Just shut up, you don't like you know, you've got five million dollars somewhere else. I was wondering, though, have you guys ever bought something or like maybe rented an apartment that seemed I didn't know, and you didn't know when something to live there. I

was going to ask the same thing. Yeah, I mean, well, I bought an apartment during the boom of real estate for two or twenty thousand dollars and then it was worth sixty four months later when you after you moved in, was there something annoying about it? Like it was uh yeah, no, um yeah, no, your your neighbors can be bad after you move in or something. I don't know, why did that happen to you? Did you kind of think of times where I was like, oh, funck, this sucks. Was

there anything for you that comes up? Noah, Well, I mean I remember a story from you, Nicki. It's it's almost like one of my favorite Nikki stories. And I even found it my notes. When you lived in Manhattan on the five story walk up and you left your sink running and you locked yourself out of the apartment. That was the worst. That was insane. Oh my god, Luigi, I was brushing my teeth running the water. I was send into Jennifer Lawrence's apartment to hang out with her.

It was one of the last times we ever hung out. Luigi barked because there was a package at the door. I went to go get it. Luigi ran out in the hall without a leash. Um. I ran out to like get him. The door slammed behind me, locking me out. I was brushing my teeth and I just was like, already wearing clothes. I was like, fuck, no keys, no phone, no anything. I go downstairs. You cannot get on as

someone else's. I went to the restaurant downstairs. The guy was like, oh, you can check on my phone, my computer, get like email your friends. You can't get on Gmail if you don't have to to step verification that sends a message to your phone. You're locked out of everything. You can't there's nothing you can do if you don't can't break into a five story apart mint when the door was shut. Um. And then I'm just like waiting because I just I'm waiting for my landlord to get there.

So I'm downstairs at this cafe waiting for an hour or so, and just I'm like, I guess I'm supposed to be at Gens in like forty five minutes. She's definitely like she almost called the comedy cellar, thinking I was dead, like she had no idea where I was. Then all of a sudden, I see fire trucks pull up to our apartment, to my apartment, and I'm like, oh, that's interesting. Maybe I can have them like fucking break

down my door or whatever get me in. Um And then the restaurant guy comes out and it's like there's water leaking down and I was like, that's so weird. I guess my landlord will be here like sooner because there's obviously an emergency in my apartment. Come to find out,

it's my apartment. I left the water running my sink would always get clogged, and it filled up, it started running and I it completely flooded my apartment and um, but my apartment was tilted, so it only flooded my pathroom because it all ran to the side, which was a great aspect of it. And then that that was the worst. That was when I realized if you don't have your phone, you are hut. There's nothing you can do because everyone has to step verification. Everyone does. What

do you do um. Yeah, I mean that I cried so hard the night that I got to the department I got. I found it on Crimeslist, and I moved from l A to Chelsea. Was right down the street, two blocks away and from where I am now. And I arrived on January two thousand Uh sorry, there was two thousand eighteen. It was January like something, literally a week after the day late. I think the day after I got there with Luigi, I flew in. I had

terrible turbulence. I literally thought I was gonna die. I wrote to Chris because I was just like scared, and I missed my ex boyfriend that I had broken up with, like you know, three months before, and I wrote to him. He was in like Abu Dhabi and I was like, I think I'm literally gonna get this plant is going down and he was just like that's ucks or something, and I was just like, he doesn't love me. I was so sad. Luigi was scared. Land in January. It's

sucking cold, It's fuck. I have so many bags because I'm moving, no one to help me with them. Oh god. I get to my apartment and it is way smaller than it looked on Crymsliss and I am just on this food on sobbing like and I just keep going, I'm so sorry. Why did I do this? We had a beautiful place in l A. I was moving here for the serious show and just get away from my life in New York. It was awful and then Pete Lee came over and like talked me off the ledge. Literally,

I was just like it was. It was the worst. The apartment was so small, and you know, there were some good times, but rarely in that apartment other times Like, I feel like I've gotten lucky with spaces though in terms of like bad neighbors or low water pressure, things that don't work. Um, I've been really blessed. So knock on, knock on wood, knock on wood. Let's take a quick break and come back with why do I can? All right? Why do I care? Why do I care? All right?

Ben Affleck downplays matching with selling sunsets Emma her her Non after she talks about d m NG with him in on the RYA app okay, but didn't him and JL get back together in twenty so, like what's the big yes? Come out? His story? He was saying, I'm inactive yes. So Riya has confirmed that he has not been an active member for several years, and she's and she said that, um. His his opening pickup line was that they had a Boston connection. Okay, like, girls gotta stop.

I mean, I've talked about people I matched with on Riya, but like, there's nothing wrong here. They just got engaged and now everyone's I'm so annoyed with their engagement though, I'm so annoyed with that I cannot take jublic was it public? What was it? I don't even know. No, he proposed to her in the bath. She was taking a bath and he came in and she was butt naked and he proposed her and she said it was

most romantic thing that ever happened to her. But her Instagram post so she tells the whole story about it on down on the j Lo or on the j Lo or some kind of dumb app she has where it's like her fans can really get to know her. So she's like on Instagram, she posts this little smarmie like I have some great news, and she's talking like a baby and she's just like glistening, and it's so

annoying and it's all to promote. It's like, I just don't like celebrities using they're like personal lives to like trick you into just tell us you had the information. I just I thought it was gross, And I do people pay for this down with the j LO app? Probably of course the monetize it a way, or at least she gets your information so then they can send you when she's going to be coming to your town, or that Mary is coming out on Blu Ray at a Red Box near you. It's just it just grosses.

I don't know why she annoys me so much. I'm sure if I met her, I would think she was lovely. She seems really her friendship with Lea Remedy seems like really real and funny, and she's obviously extremely talented and beautiful. But I just am irritated by it all. I don't know, I don't know why. I guess I feel bad for Ben Afflecks exes, feel bad for Jennifer Garner, I feel bad for on a day arm miss just to like see them all like fucking making out all the time.

And but I just think it's like respect your exes and tone it the funk down, and you you are doing this for publicity, you know, to say so they can put out like more movie. I yeah, I know what you're talking about them. So it's like it makes us talk about them, like, um, why do you why do you put you and Brenna on your on your Instagram? Is that to like Garner more fans like you do it to celebrate I'm happy in my life. And I just think that there's is not really all about that.

There's a difference. Like I just feel like people either post about their loved ones when they're in a rocky part of their relationship and they have to like let everyone, they have to just they have to. They have to do the opposite of what it is real because it's like they feel like people might be able to sense it, so they post something really good because they're in hot water with their person, or like the public might think they're not doing well so they put that out there,

or it's it's just publicity. It's just so people will talk about them. But it's like it's just I don't know, sometimes it's nauseating and maybe I'm just jealous, yeah, because I remember, I mean I get I do get jealous of like their p d A. I think it's sweet and Chris, have you and Chris ever gone public on Instagram like officially, like with a photo I did back in the day, like before I had a lot of like when we were together back a long, long ago. Um,

he really has no interest in that. I know. I'm just wondering. I'm just like thinking about it because I don't remember. And like I said, for women, it makes people hate you, Like I have too many male fans that kind of fantasize about me being single or like, and they just I would lose followers. It would be really it would be interesting to see how many you

would lose. I would just just as an experiment. Yeah, I mean I would probably lose less than a thousand, but I would lose a lot, I think, And I just don't see the point in it. And also yeah, there's other reasons too, but I just don't see. Uh. I feel like one will come out after the reality show comes out. I feel like I can talking about them on my podcast because I feel like besties can handle it. But like my fans that are just like you're you know, the other fans who I love and need,

I do love and need them. I need them to like in their mind think that if I don't have a boyfriend, they could suck me someday. Like, what is it? Like? It really is true. I've done it before. I've one followed a guy where when I was single that I just like was like, I don't want to see you happy with a girl. Get out of here. You were only interesting to me when you're single. Do you think guys are thinking that they can't funck j Lo now because of bed affleck? Like Jlo doesn't need men are

not following. J Loo's fans are mainly women? Yeah? Does I just and maybe gay men straight men can admire her and they know she's so out there that they could never get her. But like, no, I don't think that it affects her as much. Ok. Let's go to top one, bottom one. Because it's Monday. Our category today is top one, Bottom one. Drum roll. Moments from this weekend. Moments from this weekend. This was a big weekend from me, and Andrew. Noah, I'm assuming you had a weekend as well. Yes,

it was a big weekend for me too. Yeah were you you weren't an lady rite? No, I wasn't in l A but I turned thirty nine. Oh, Bay, did we really miss your birthday? I mean Friday, it's fine calendar and I missed it. God damn it. I like had it in my mind. I was like, it's been a while since it was Noah's birthday. It feels like it's almost been a year. I know you, don't I know you. It's not okay. I'm not okay, even though I've forgotten all of my best friend's birthdays this year,

so you're in good company. Noahst my mom, all of them forgotten here. I'm gonna know when it's Andrew's birthday or I was present on that day. Um, I'm so sorry to miss it. Was that your top okay? Well? Um my moments? Yes, my top moments are from my birthday celebrations, which you're not the only one who forgot it. And I think it's just because it fell on like a Friday and I haven't really been in touch with people.

So I did post it like I posted about it on Saturday because I said, I feel like a lot of people are going to be mad at me because I didn't say anything, and it's going to make them feel like they did something wrong by not wishing me a happy birthday. But um, for me, it was definitely a weekend full of good moments with uh uh older friends, meaning like friends I've had for like a year and a half ever since moving here. Um newish friend and

like brand new friends. So I had friends being a year and half old friends nor No, I mean like I made them like a year and a half ago when I moved to this new town that I've never lived in before, and I didn't know anyone. The first friend you made when you got do you have a romantic dinner or anything or what did you? Um? Yes, I did have a romantic dinner. Um. I am going through something personally that I'm not ready to talk about, but I will share it with you guys once I'm

over the the thing. Um. So um, you know, I've I've just been kind of like dealing with something um that's like emotional or like more like mental. So just um being able to just kind of connect with other people. And I was invited to a birthday party a barbecue, and I always get very nervous. I think, oh, I don't know how to party anymore. You know, I don't drink, I don't smoke, I don't do anything that's considered fun and cool. Nobody else at that party did anything like that.

It was just like just deep conversations and just a good easy time. God, I love that. I love that so much. I love I was just filling out something about St. Louis, like the best of St. Louis, and it was like the best bars, the best breakfast spots. I'm like, I don't do any of this stuff. I don't eat breakfast foods because there's nothing's vegan. I don't go to bars. I just feel like so and Carl I was talking about this too, like we're just like

not cool anymore anymore. But like I love it doesn't have to be deep conversations, but it's fun when it can be. I just want to hang out with people that you can just be yourself with and you don't have to go hi, oh my god, good to see you. Just might be in that voice ever in my life ever if I can't wait it, especially on a weekend when I'm supposed to be doing what I want to

do with my time. There's like a lesson in like when you have to do like something socially, to not overthink it before, Like I do that too thought like you're like, oh my god, I'm gonna have to fucking I'm gonna have to drink with these or I'm gonna have to do this, and you like you play like fifty five scenarios and then you get there and it's like people are just sitting by a fire, like feel like really nice people, Like usually people are gonna air

on the side of being nice. Like I think in our twenties were so around like drunk fucked cards that like we expect that to happen the rest of our lives, you know what I mean. When I am around drunk charts, it's kind of nice because if I don't want to be there, I can just leave. That's true, and they don't even know yet. When I was younger, I was like I have to be I have to be one too,

you know. But now I'm just like the sucks and I from being someone who was drunk for so long, I know, I don't you would never remember like anything, so like I was when I was writing about the St. Louis thing, I was like, you know, I did go to bars in my twenties in St. Louis, but I don't remember any of them. And they were all ship holes where it was loud and I was lose my voice, and they were dirty and gross and there's p all over the seats, like I don't I can't recommend any

of those places. And I was blackout drunk for all of it. So it's your house, Okay, what were your I guess we started with the top What were your top moments? My top moment was, honestly the the the shows.

The I was just I just like love being on stage recently, and I can like honestly say that my favorite moments were on stage and just feeling like I would do like really long sets to like Our and forty seven minutes for one of my sets Our thirty like every single night, and that's the longest I've ever gone, and I just really appreciate that the audience can be with me that long and at the end of it still like I know when I've lost them, and I'm sure I've lost some of them by the end of it.

That's so fucking long, but it's a really good feeling that by the end of it, like I when I walk off stage, I don't have to usually run off stage because I don't want to make them feel like they have to keep clapping, like I want them to be just done with their duty of like supporting me. So I run off stage to like, I don't want you guys to have to like keep going, like I

just feel bad. But this time I was able to like take it in and like look at them enjoying me and like and like and like take in their praise because they were giving me love and I was able to accept it at the end and be like, no, they wanted. I felt like it was deserved and like I appreciated it. So that was my favorite. I guess my top one was Tricky Nikki and going to my parents.

That was fun. Now, um, I would say no obviously seeing my dad was up there, but like, no, performing Yeah, the shows were fucking fantastic this weekend, and I think, like, yeah, I don't know, I feel like similar in the sense of like like really feeling like I'm doing exactly what I'm saying, exactly what I want to, like being the kind of comic I kind of want to be, Like I don't know, and it just feels good. It just really does. And I'm performing in Florida especially, like it

just it feels nice. It just feels nice and and and the other thing I love too is just like writing the jokes with you beforehand and stuff. I felt like we got along really well this weekend. Yeah, we did throwing the baseball, just a lot of like just like very it was a very chill week until like like now, it was the most chill like weekend we've ever had. I think, Yeah, even though it was so

much travel and so much like work. Um, all right, let's do bottom bottom bottom bottom um bottom moment from this weekend Andrew. Um, I guess, uh, it's annoying. Like when I get back I think back to St. Louis is the bottom because like I'm so like exhausted and I want to be like there for Brenna so much and be like happy and like present, but I just I physically can't, and it's hard for me to, like, um,

I don't. I think that's like the hardest part is like coming back from the road and like trying to like, um, I don't know, communicate in a way where you you're like, look, it has it's nothing to do with not being excited to see you. Yeah, it's just it's just like my brain is literally like just like I don't even know what it is like. So that's the hard that's the hardest part. I think about how much we and you know, I can't even imagine with how much even more you

actually do on the road. So it's like, yeah, it's really tough on relations. I am struggling as well with mine. It's like just not like, you know, what do you do when you're gone, because there's just so much to cut up on. You're not living the same lives when you get back. Um, you just want to be your

best versions of yourselves, but you're fucking tired. And as the weekends, like on the weekends is typically when people spend time with their partners and go on dates, and you guys are working, yes, and it looks like we're having the most fun on earth because we're on Instagram like there are Like if they saw his sleep all day, they would know that it's not like, yeah, but we're allowed to have I don't think that. Oh yeah, of

course I'm not saying it's hard to like it. Yeah, it's hard for probably them to see like why can't you just be that fun right now? Like you were that fun last night? And it's like, well, yeah, I was also like having to put on a show. I

was a showman last sight. Yeah, um yeah, I found that to be just as hard to I will say the worst part of the weekend for me was checking into the hotel in Jacksonville and getting in my room and unpacking my bags and unpacking my bowels, and then getting a call on the phone that said, uh, ma'am, you don't have a room here. We accidentally checked you in and you're not supposed to stay here. You're you have a room somewhere else, And having to go downstairs

lug all my luggage back downstairs. We are an hour and a half from showtime, so I just wanted to like rest for an hour, and I think it was an hour and a half before I had to get absolutely ready, And so then we had to go downstairs, We had to get a lift, we had to go across town. I checked in the wrong fucking hotel. Um. It was just a big mix up, and they I

don't know how why they let me in. That was the weird thing that I was talking them downstairs and they're like, because they let you up, And then they're like, well, we don't have your reservation. They let you in under the someone's name is like Gosser. I was like, that's not me, that's not close. They must get so many like misspellings with people booking them, like through the phone or something that they just like, yeah, she's probably Gosser.

Final thought, Noah, what was your low point of the weekend? So m av is he volunteers with the Search and rescue team here in Arizona. Basically, people go hiking, they get injured, and this team goes out and helps take these people out or if they get stranded and stuff. So last night he's been wanting to answer a call for so long. He got one call and ended up getting canceled. He came home, and then another call where three people got stranded on the side of a cliff.

So it's like seven o'clock on Sunday night and he answered that call, and you know, like we thought, all right, he's gonna be back at eleven, twelve o'clock at night. I wake up at twelve, Okay, he's not back. I wake up at three, he's not back. I wake up at four thirty he's not there. And I just like kept getting up, but it's like, oh, he's not back home.

So it's actually I was like, hey, can you just let me know that you're alive or just like like this text when you see it, and uh until seven twenty in the morning, I hadn't heard back from him, and he's like, yes, I'm alive. Oh my god. It ended up being like a really tough rescue for like all these volunteers and stuff. These three people got caught like stuck. Um, I guess they were like mountaineering or something. They ran out of rope and it was in the

middle of the night. They were off the trail, like deep off the trail, and he had to like just spend overnight finding them, you know, like in the middle of the night to find someone is really challenging. Uh So yeah, it was like a whole big thing. And I was just like, hmm, I wonder if he's gonna make it back. And I didn't know. All nights really scary. I'm so Buddy's okay, but like, yeah, those hours between twelve and seven thirty in the morning probably not the

best sleep you've ever had. Yeah, So it's like, why couldn't he text? Did he was he had? He wasn't in service I guess where he was. So he said that, Um, his phone ended up dying and he had his battery pack, but he didn't have the wire to plug the phone into it. And then his friend had a satellite phone and he he wanted to send me a message to the satellite phone, but he didn't know my phone number.

Oh well, that is hilarious. It kind of reminds me of always Sunny when they keep throwing more cats in the wall, Like he went to go save someone. Now he's gone, and now now he gave by the wire, they have to like lower down a wire to him, a rope to the guy. That's great they saved him that. I mean, what a great thing to do for people. Hopefully he wasn't too tired today to be Were you so horny for him when he told you about this? Um, I will be later, like after I catch leep. That's

a good point. I lost a lot of sleep this weekend too, because I'm doing Watch What Happens Live on Wednesday night on Watch what Happens, Watch what Happens when I don't save lives. And I said, talk to Andy Cohen about reality TV? Have you done anything with Andy Cohen before? No, no, and he's from St. Louis and so I'm promoting the St. Louis show obviously, and I uh. They asked me, They're like, so, what Bravo shows you

know in preparation? What Bravo shows do you watch? And I was like, none, Like I don't And that's not a slide on Bravo. They have the best entertainment ever. All everyone I know watches everything on that network. And I just have never loved The Housewives because I don't like supporting drunk I just don't. It makes me. It triggers me because it's just a lot of screaming and a lot of drunkenness and like meanness, and even though it's like very compelling, it just doesn't do it for me.

What you know, other reality shows do. But I'm wrong because everyone, everyone clearly loves it show, so I'm in the wrong. And then I've never watched Below Deck or anything like that, even though those are supposed to be great. I used to watch Millionaire Matchwiker, and then I realized I used to watch Summer House, but I don't watch

Summer House anymore because Hannah was kicked off. And then I go, actually, I can watch Summer House because I know a lot about Summer House because I watched it, and so I've been binging Summer House thirteen episodes I watched. I stayed up all night on Saturday night because we got done at twelve and then we're leaving at four thirty. So I watched so many episodes. But I'm watching them on one and a half time speed, and it is wild and it's so entertaining and I love it so much.

So I got no sleep doing that. And also I was thinking about the boyfriend thing. This morning. I woke up and I was packing at like five o'clock in the morning or six, and Chris was I wanted to sleep in so bad, and I'm just like trying to be super quiet, and he like gets up and I seem kind of like messing with his iPad. He like blearly kissed me and it was like good morning. And I saw him like come toying with his iPad and

I was like, what are you doing over there? And he was just like, I'm just gonna watch some there's a race going on, and he puts on Formula one and Formulae is always happening, like another part of the world. So it's like always it the like crack Dog. So it was on Formula One and he's just like watching it, and I was like, I felt like, I go, this

is no slight to you. I feel like I'm watching I'm babysitting for a little boy who's just like eating fruit loops, watching cartoons like race cars, just going room room, And I was like, do you like your room ROMs? Oh? Do do car go fast? Carkoal Fast? And I was just like so belittling everything about it. I was like, I just know that I just don't understand this, and

that's why I know it looks stupid to me. You look like like just because you know, just kind of like, you know, like little boys like falling sleep in front of cartoons and they don't even know what's going on in the cartoon, but they just like like the colors and shapes. Like That's what I felt like, Yeah, is what a womombs He likes. He likes Formula One and m m A which I like to call Mama another baby food. I ate them. All Right, we gotta go. We want more show for you tomorrow and the rest

of the week. I'm gonna be on the Today Show tomorrow morning if you want to watch, I think it's gonna be on it like nine eastern, if you want to check that out. I'll be gonna be on with Sarah Silverman, so that will be super fun. And then I'll be on Watch What Happens Live on Wednesday Night with someone I don't know if I could say who, Maybe i'll say it tomorrow. But um, thank you guys so much for listening to the show. We are in Minneapolis and Madison this weekend to get still on sale.

Two shows in Madison, so more tickets to the sale for that. If you go alone, I will give you a free meet and greet. You just have two d m me go going alone and all caps. Tell me your full name and which show you're going to. And I gotta go because there's another old time you find her alarm going up? Hi, guys, don't be good and check me down the river over there by the mall. I'm tired. Stop