#160 A Size Too Small w/ Anya Marina

Podcast Nicki Glazer podcasts. An, I mean, we got to talk about your outfit, Andrew Collin. For those of you who are watching the video in a couple of days, Andrew has a festive look. Jimmy Buffett, Golden crowd buffet, trust fund golfing kids. Yeah, trust fund golfing kid, frat guy going to a theme party, you know, trying to get laid still. But like also, um, the shirt is in an old vestige of the show, the early days of the show. Um, we started the show in the

Cayman Islands. You bought that shirt one day when we went to go shopping at a mall and um, it is a Tommy Bahama correct. Yes, it's an original. Yeah yeah, there's no other prints. Um yeah, I bought it right off the wall. It was framed. I took it out. Oh god, this thing was on sale. They saw him coming. It was you know, it was one of the things where they're like, it's on sale and it was eight It wasn't like eighty seven dollarsthing that like I got

on sale. Like yeah, I mean the original price, the artist said was Mr. Bham. You know, it's like the original price is on the price tag and there's already a line through it with the same font that the price has written, So you know that it was never that price. Dude, I'm saying, yes, yeah, are intended price. I think what happened is they bought fifteen for the wait staff at the restaurant next door. Yeah, and then one guy died so they had one extra. Yeah, they did.

They did a whole collection for a local hotel. Star. It is very white there for their valet boys. You do work. I look like a valet guy to have to ask his friend to drive state that show white lotus. Yeah, very quickly they forget and then the titles. I've never known how to pronounce this titles. Uh the no, well, the hat it is, it's a titleless hat. It's made for a golfer who doesn't want to get too much son who likes to party, have a little Miami rice

peanut Colada around three pm. Because it's two pm somewhere. You know what I mean. Well, he walked in this morning where and he's also wearing shorts. Are those uh swim shorts? These are a Lulu lemon short which act as a swim workout. Or you could go to a restaurant. Are you go anywhere in those who Lulu who? Um? You're dressing this way because it's nice outside. It's nice outside. It was nice outside, like when you went outside, or because you looked at the weather. I looked at the weather.

I did go outside today. I went to FedEx already this morning to pick up a golf club that wasn't sent to me, even though I paid for overnight shipping. That's a whole thing. I read the reviews. This woman was worse than Hitler apparently, and I thought this was a year ago. She got these bad review You ever go to the reviews of like a FedEx, like it talks about the FedEx location. Like this woman wouldn't even look me in the eyes. She didn't say a word

to me. She didn't. She wouldn't even get my package. Even though it's the fifth time, I'm like so scared to go in there, and I'm like, I'm gonna kill her with kindness. I'm like, I'm like, she's gotta be fired by now. It's been a year, and right when I walked in, I was like, this is definitely the woman, Like she still has her job. No, she wasn't. The manager's name was a guy's name. Maybe she doesn't. I mean, wait,

what made you reviews before going? That's point because I've ordered another package that has gone through and never got to me. They're notorious for being notoriously bad. Why can't they just directly yeah without stopping a Fedic, Well they all have. They got to stop at places you never follow your package. Kind of fun. I have a bikini from Italy stuck in Jersey. It's been there for eight months. I've made at so I got a bikini secan Jersey. So wait, how long has it been? Yourn No, it's

because USPS. You can't. I tried to file a claim. I've been to offices and I've just just I hear Nikki's voice in my head, going, Babe, how much is this worth to you? Is it worth a hundred and fifty dollars to just let it go? How many hours do you think you've spent trying to get it's it's more agonizing over it, like, well, I have a bathing suit in Mexico. I really wanted this three or four or seventeen posh mark they'll have you in three days. Yeah,

I just can't get this thing. Good question. Have you called the actual bikini place because I wrote to them and they're like the second you can't call them because it's they're in Italy. Ordered this thing from Italy. It came it was a size too small. I returned it because Matt was like, that's a little small. So I reluctantly returned it. I was like, all right, I go, I'll get a size up. And then it did. Do you think it was too small or did? He just was I was like, this is a little small, but

I could deal with. I forgot you should always order a bikini one size bigger because your boyfriend everyone look better. Yeah, and um, yeah, you don't want it like tight. You don't want to be busting out. Yeah. And because you know me, Yeah, you're even in a snow jacket, your tits are big. So I wrote to the Italian company. They're like, the second it gets back, we'll give you a refund and we'll send you a new one. And then it's just stuck in Jersey for eight months. It's

some holding facility at Gladys. I brought a bunch of swimsuits to Hawaii with me, and I sometimes put them on when my lover and I are about to hook up because I don't have like lingerie, but like, I have a really slutty swimwear that this company. When I was in Cayman Islands, they gifted me like a ton of swimsuits that are just skimpy string like nipple cover swimsuits. And sometimes I'll put one on because I just I

like having something for him to take off. Like sometimes I'll walk in and I'm like getting out the shower and I'm totally naked, and I'm like, you wait right there, and I'll like put something on because I'm like I like having something for you to take off, and um, so I'll just throw on because I have like twenty of these swimsuits and some are so tiny, and I brought a bunch of them to Hawaiian and he was like, you have to wear one of those out. You have to.

It looks so slutty and so like I want I want you to. You have to, Like he kind of wants me to like look slutty in front, like like you have to, like other guys are gonna know you're fucking slut. Like it was kind of like this hot thing, like you you're gonna people are gonna uggle you and like know that you're a filthy slut. Like. It was like kind of a hot thing. And I was like, I can't wear this. It is insane. He's like, I

think it's great. And I didn't end up doing it because they were literally I was like, if I run into Bill Maher, I'm not gonna be able to ever,

there won't be any professional relationship between us ever. Get probably get on the show, you'll get more like I just especially That's why I don't like having boobs like cleavange out ever, because guys can't, you know, it's not like they're I don't think guys are just complete animals, but I kind of do, like they can't focus if they're I feel like titty is like just tempting them as a guy. If a girl is wearing every bikini for a girl, unfortunately for you guys sometimes is that

it's revealing. Even a one piece, you can't hide anything. So it's like if you're showing a little bit less like Bill Maher is already to understand your body if you're wearing a bikini at all, you know what I mean, Different things that can look so slutty like that you don't understand. Like if I would have moved an inch, you would see like my nipple, and like there's something

about a nipple, Yeah, that changes things. It does. Why because we're told that you can't show it even if you see the outline up or like the the aerial law, it's like, oh my god, there'll be a TikTok and a girl will have like a quarter nipple out and people will lose their fucking mind because it's a quarter nip, yeah, as opposed to a full nip. It's interesting. I don't know why. Maybe just a taboo. Yeah, and it's like what you can't have, and it's like sneaky, and everyone

wants what they can't have. That's why no one should come. You don't even want the full nipple you want, you want the build up, the quartercom you want. That's every They've done so many studies about pleasure and the anticipation of the thing that you're excited about getting is better than getting it. I don't agree. I never agree with that because I always whenever I come, that feeling when the comming is coming out of my cock is way better than when it was inside my cock. It's just

not even cloth. Maybe I'm glad we got here at this point in the podcast I did. I wasn't sure when. Yeah, it builds up. Yeah you want to talk about because we already got to the coming part. Yeah, that's true, A little yeah, he I could go there and they're not I could go there. I want to know what's going on in China. They're killing Muslims over there, about Kazakhstan. Edge they're also freaking acting up, for sure, acting everyone's acting a fool. But these days over there, So what's

your plan today? My plan? I got a golf lesson at two thirty and then who knows who the funk knows? Are you going to wear that to your golf lesson? Yeah? I was gonna say, there's no way you're walking around with that. I would Did you go to fed X in that? No? Because I wanted to be respected by that woman. That's Hitler, right, So you understand the idea of not wanting to wear If Bill mart saw me in this, oh my god, I like it, actually, thank you.

It just I just don't think the weather should predict how we dress. I feel like, when you're in the Midwest, it's like it's time to look like a fucking lumberjack. This is who you are because it's keeps you warm, I know, but there should be warm summer clothes. How about that like that print on a sweater, like that same print that that Hawaiian. I don't know if we should talk about this online because I think we just

came across a business idea summer winter summer. Tell me I'm wrong, endless summer, Yes, endless summer, that's actually the summer winter wear. A name of a nikki glazer or really original song. Well, it's a lot of things and we didn't. He didn't coin the phrase hold on so endless summer where I want to understand what you think this is. So it's like a sweatshirt with that print. Yes, so the clothing is warm, the print you want, there's there's prints like that. Dude. Yeah, I'll buy you one.

I don't think you wear it because that is a ridiculous print. That's because you're seeing it through a very small lens. Okay, let's let's I think you're looking at it as like this in summer that belongs in winter. Black, sad, earth tone colors. I wear black in the summer. Man, Now that's a lyric. Yeah, I wear a wool crop top, that's true. I do like that. That is a thing that I do like is like sweatery crop tops and that is a weird but but they're not comfortable in

the summer because sweater is a heavy material. I'm just saying I like the look of it, but it's not you wear flowy things in the summer, and that that is a So that plant that's on your that's a summer plant. Like that's in climates that are you know, warm, That's why it's you know, something that I get that, but why are we not bringing this print? Why are we letting the change is gonna let us do anything. Climate change isn't affecting the shirt. This shirt will always

have a flower on it. It's not going to die. It looks like we'll have a place and Andrew's closet and hard ice perks. My kids are getting bigger underneath the ice sperg causing them to collapsed. Do you see that rock collapse in Brazil? These boaters a whole rock? Just the rock collapsed? Wait? Really, rock collapse on a boat? Yeah, killed a bunch of people. Oh Jesus, let's not go there again. Anya heard that episode with Matt. They were driving in the car and there you called me you Yeah,

that's right, I called you. It was eye opening for me because I always thought several was over the number five but under ten. But I just invented that. I guess in the dictionary it says over to but not maybe less than ten, but not that many. I don't know if it actually says to him. I think it says more than more than two, but not that. Andrews said it could be hundreds of thousands, So several seconds there's been years, there's been infinity seconds. What do you

mean the increment? You mean the the environment that it's happening, not that because when you go, oh, he you know, walked in space for several minutes, minutes are an infinite. There's an infinite minutes. So that's not dependent on the time. There's infinite. I'm saying the time an hour, sixty minutes, okay, but what what do you mean, Like, no one goes how many minutes out of an hour is several No

one says that because of the several hours. Right, So let's say ten hours, that's a long time, But no one would say that several hours, seven hours is a long I'm saying. I'm saying ten hours is a long time. And then if you put it in minutes, if you said that would be ten times, that'd be six minutes. That's that seems like a very long time. We don't disagree here, So then minutes would to me, ten minutes

would not be several minutes. To me, it wouldn't because it's about that would be too many minutes to several Yes, that's in your definition everyone else's, But in my definition, which is, um, you've gotta you know parrot head kind of approach. You time measure things by units. We measure them by feeling fluid ounces by a sun dial, which is right behind the barb underneath the poet's head that died in seven who used to talk and say, tweety

bed is here for yeager bob. Dagger bobs weren't. Oh god, But you get my point, Like several to me, but the whole thing about six summer hours, I'm lost. Yeah. Matt was actually like, I kind of get where he's coming from. He's saying, He's like, it is funny, but he goes, I get what he's saying. He's saying, if you're talking about a unit of something that has a bunch of little units in it, he's saying that several can't be applied to that, right, Yes it can. Several

can be applied. If it's a lot, I lose myself. But if if it's ten minutes to me before I found out, it's not several, If it's a hundred minutes, that's several minutes. Wait, I don't know what you lost. You lost me a hundred minutes of several minutes to me? Why because it's a big number. And it's a small permit. So a thousand seconds several? Okay, now you're ready ten hours not several? Why because it's twenty hours several? Wait? Can you just five hours is not several and twenty

hours is several? Yes? Why? Okay, ten hours would be several. This makes no sense that more would be several. Wait, what do you mean a thousand minutes? Several is not dependent? It's always that's your definition though it's the dictionaries. I guess I'm trying to We got to figure out what this word is that you are talking about, because it ain't several. I think it's probably, uh, there's Yeah, there's got to be something many many. I think we're talking

about many. When I hear many, I think several, several thousand. Let's take a quick break and come back with more, Andrew, we'll be back in several minutes. No couple many, A couple of we're back. Um, so we figured it out. I think, No, we did it. We're not. We're not going to. We can't go on. We can. People are probably lose seen it. But I think one guy did write me and saying that there's something in the history

about Saval being used back in the day. I'm not kidding about where my like Chaucer's back in Canterbury tells some guy was like, how long is that knights are going to take? You are smart about something sometimes like really smart this one not it's not it, But I think my method is pretty intelligent. You have not explained your method whatsoever. No one gets you know what I need like a will hunting to put it up on a board with equations to break it down for people.

Great film, Yes, I do love that. What's your favorite movie? It's not your fault? Husbands and wives? Woody Allen, that's right? Whoa edge? How could you say? Do you know you love about that? Ludie Davis Judy Davis incredible performance, so good, she's so watchable. There's a scene where she's she and

her husband is split up. He cheated on her, and she's going on a date with someone new, very reluctantly, and she's like, could you excuse me for one minute, and she just goes to call her husband repeatedly and to just bitch him out. And it's the best scene. And you can relate because you're like, don't make the call, do not You're not in a state of mind to make this call. But it's just so good her mons.

We have that scene and Friends, Uh, when Jennifer Aniston is like trying to get over Ross and she goes on a date and she gets all drunk. It's such a good scene and she's she borrows the guy's cell phone she's on a date with, and she's just so she's and she goes, Hey, Ross, it's Rachel. And she's like she's wanting to get closer because the guys like

sounds like you don't close. And she's like and um, you know, because she's on this date and the guy's like giving up on this girl who's like just keeps talking about this Ross guy. Why didn't she use her phone because different number? Because this is like I guess he has a phone and she doesn't. I don't know. And she goes and she's like and I am over you. And she's like and the guy is like sitting there and she's talking to the guy like are too proud

of me doing this? And she's like I am over you. And then she goes and that is what we call closure, and she like shuts it. She shuts the phone and then throws it in the like wine kind of bucket, the ice bucket, and then she leans back and she's like all proud of herself. And then the next morning she's like all hungover at her apartment and she can't really remember anything, you know, you could just tell. She's like, and she's living on the couch and Ross walks it

and she gets up. She was just like hi, oh hi, and he's just like, rich, uh do you mind him? I gotta check my messages? Can I check Monica's phone? And she's like yeah, go ahead, go ahead. She's like, god last night and he goes, good date last night and she's like, I can't really remember, but yeah, yeah yeah,

And so he's taking his message. She's like and then she walks into her bedroom and he goes, oh, right, I got a message from you, and then you just see her walk out and go oh no, oh no, no no no, and then she jumps up on him and she's like no, Ross, Ross, stop, and she's like running out him and she grabs the phone and he's holding onto it and he's still listening, and she's like she has she's wrapped around him like a tree trunk, you know, and she's like climbing up him, and then

she takes the phone and she throws it into the sink and he goes, you're you're over me and she goes, oh no, and she starts sliding down him like she's sliding down like a p She goes, oh no, no no, and he's like, when were you? When were you under me? And then it breaks apart everything. It's the beast No, he's like, and she goes, I I uh and he's like and he just he can't handle it because he's

loved her forever. Never left a message drunk on some guy's phone, left text messages, But what about voice anything like swinger style. I've done that like in college with that same girlfriend, Like me, what did that sound like? Just sadness, just complete disaster of like it starts like, hey, what's you know? It's like swingers. It really was like when I watched that, I was like, so good, Hey, Nikky, one more thing? Yeah he he uh, Hey Christo, what's up?

It's Andrew just seeing where you're at. It's like just checking in, just slides into yeah, and then like cut to two hours later, It's like, what the funk the I fucking love you, dude. Why don't fun, why don't answer your phoney? I'm still at the boot Can you just come by? I'm with Jeff. And then two hours after that it's just like I don't know anymore. Then two hours after that it's like, I'm in jail, like

you emails or my thing? Why that's harassing? But you know what, You're with a guy that you said, yeah an email either. But man, when I drank, those were bad. A lot of fassive, aggressive text messages that would progressively go from like you know someone I hadn't heard from in months, and I'd be like, you never gave me a nickname? I wanted a nickname, and that would be like where did you get that one? Tristan prettyman and

I's a songwriter. We used to drink sake together and then right when we started getting buzz, we were like, let's play this game. Let's send our exes the same text. And we would send all of our exes, like maybe six people the same text, and whoever wrote back quickest or wittiest was like the winner of our drunk into game. No one except us too. Yeah, now did it ever lead to more or the next day, like, oh shoot,

I'm dating this guy again. Like no, it was always a huge disappointment and waking up smiting your forehead like you weren't texting excess that you rejected, You were texting excess that probably you wanted to drudge something again, That's what I'm thinking. It never dredged up. No, if we could get them back, if we would have them back, it was all these things don't work, futile tasks. But

that's such a funny line to go. Never gave me a nick like they're trying to think of something like what would And we would even text like guy friends that we hoped something would start up, would be like let's just see if this guy takes the bait. Yes, what's your best nick name you've ever gotten from a guy? And what is the best nickname? On? I always liked on.

That's just a British thing for anya. But they call me Gunge in high school because I seemed Hi, Yeah, well that's that's that's created gun But everyone's way what's of gone? I just came up with that gone. John Jack guy I really liked, called me gonja because he was a huge pothead and I seemed hie. It means horrible and rugs the great words. She taught me that word yesterday dinner. But wet us but oh she's she's like oozing wetness getting hard. What's your bed ning name? Nick? This?

This kid in fifth grade UM used to call me nickel pickle pearl. I don't know what it was, but he was just like his name was John Jordan's, I believe, and he was like nickel pickle pearl, and I just loved it. The best I've ever heard nicol pickle pearl, very southern, Yeah, from John Jordan's. He was just just like a little black kid who just like had took a shine to me. Was just and I did not I didn't think I was worthy of a nickname. Back then it was very cool. Yeah, I've never felt worthy

of a nickname? Did you ever get one? I got one in high school as girls I wanted riddling from me? Okay, how you had access to it for your d and I wouldn't take it because I couldn't eat and then I'd be tired for sports. So girls knew I had it in my front pocket. They could like smell it out and they would chase me down the hall. Hey, God, did you did you feel cool? No? I felt like such a loser because I felt like a drug dealer

that didn't make any money. What a loser that is fucking I'm Jewish and I'm not even turning this into a return. I probably could have sold them forty I mean, these girls drove BMW's. Yeah, they would have given you money for it, and then they would have respected you for like having you to please take my drugs. So it was like an I can't eat where I'm not even and starting Oh my god, yeah, every day riddling and a little tinfoil thing, and I'm taken in front

of my mom. Oh so your mom would watch you take it? She was around. Yeah, in the next round. You're the only person I know that avoided taking riddling for because it made you not eat. Most of those girls were doing it so they wouldn't eat. Oh, I see, I see. I bet you know a lot of people didn't take it because it made you feel like a

fucking robot. No. I read it all the time that people used to take it, right generic, I understand why people don't take it because it makes you feel amazing, Because I think the drug that that you take currently.

It is different than I've taken at Riddle and they are more there's a different, but I still I would I would take I would take any of it, and not because I'm like I'm addicted to it, but because like I'm gonna get stuff done, I'm going to be more present, I'm going to be more excited about life, I'm going to be happy. Maybe that means it just works for me. But why do people not take it? All the time? I was sadder. Yeah, it didn't make me happy. It made me No, I just should never

have been taken. Why did you like it? Then? I liked it the first time I did it, and never again I liked it. I would do like an all night or like write a paper like it did allow me to know I would be like chattery teeth till four in the morning, being like, granted, I took it a time, You're not an addict? Have you ever really? Oh? Yeah? Where which part? When did you? When did you take it?

I took it um. I had a lot of work to do and my ex had had them, so he gave it to me, and it was I felt like I was like on another like plane you know, to get a different dimension. I didn't feel happy. I just felt like, you know, just like work mode, get things done, and like, I don't know, I feel like my brain was just like an overdrive. Yeah, it is kind of funny to take a drug like that. You see the movie like Limitless, where it's like I could do anything.

But it's funny to just still be dumb but then feel like you can do a lot, Like you're doing the good Bill hunting Chalkboard, but it's six figures. It's just like it's just you writing out like sublime lyrics, Bradley. But yeah, I'm like, what this is wild, dude. I told you about the time that I took that sleeping pill. What is it called ambion Ambion French? And I was on the plane and I was like, oh my god.

I had all these song ideas and they were brilliant, and I was watching Californication on the plane and writing songs. I was like, I'm getting so much done watching this show and writing all these lyrics. And then I got home the next day and was like, I gotta check those on. It was just a notebook full of kaleidoscope designs with some dialogue from Californication, Like diagonally you sound like the you know those spider webs. There's actually in

the studio we're working uh in. They have the thing that I see all the time on Reddit where it's like they show spiders that are on different drugs and the webs that they make. It's in the studio that we're recording these songs. They have it on the wall. That's a weird spider. Yeah, they like it make spiders like high on marijuana, high on and it shows the webs that they make and how different you like art

is to a spider. You know. But it's just, um, I realized, like on Riddle and stuff like that, I'll do it. I'll do a B, like I'll get a B minus paper done lickety split, you know, like it will be or a B, let's say. But if I were to actually not do it, I would still wait till the last second, which I always do, and it would be an A, but it would take six times as long. It would be so not fun would be higher. Yes, but if you aren't unriddling, you get it done faster.

You have fun doing it and you feel like you're doing an A but it is a B. But if you do an A thing, it's like last night I was watching my special, watching the new cut, and I was like, I don't know if it's an A. And you know, my partner, we've seen it a million times. We were both like, it's not it might not be an A. And I was like, I was about to start crying because I was like, this is like the

worst feeling in the world. And I was like, not everything has to be an A. For this to be an A, I would have killed myself, it would like, and everything else in my life would have suffered. I would be something would be bad. Right now this is and some might interpret this as a'nt. I don't know what it is. I don't know how they're grading. Yes, And I have felt like it was an A before when I was unriddling editing, and I've thought right exactly,

I don't know anymore. I'm not objective anymore. Able to listen to people on coke and you've been sober and you're like, oh my god, these people are out of time. I never know when people are on coke. I remember, because you talk. I know. I don't know what's wrong with me. I really talk very fast. They think all their ideas a little bit. Actually, huh, they think all their ideas are coke. Yeah, it's it's the most annoying

thing ever. They're like they just think they're brilliant, like they have all these point of views all of a sudden, and it's like, what, like, do you remember being on coke and feeling that way? I more. For me, coke was just I just felt sexy as hell. Yeah, I felt like a fucking like Antonio been there is just walked on the dance floor. But meanwhile, if you were looking at me silver, you were like, this guy is just talking to the wall, sweating with blood, coming out

of this mode. God. But I'm just like it's Antonio's Yeah, I felt that way when I'm drunk. You look in the mirror and you're like, oh my god, I'm so fun. Yeah. What it is, And it's so interesting because it's a chemical that's doing something to your brain that your brain is capable of feeling all the time. So like you know the weather today, you're going to be in a better mood because it's like birds are chirping, it's like

nice outside. But you're capable of feeling that way in cold, Like the weather is not changing your brain in a way. It's just you can get to that state. It's just harder. Like you said, like riddling gets you there. We're all we want to get there quicker, like whatever that feeling of of dopamine, we gotta get there euphoria. Yeah, And so you get there through four fucking Jager bombs as opposed to four years of meditation, like you know what

I mean. Like, so it's just I don't know, it's like several I got a the micro needling yesterday and I got a little lip injection and I got a little like under eye stuff, and like when you first get it done, you can just see the results. And I mean I looked like beating up like with my skin pigment because of the micron thing, but the filler and stuff, there's no swelling. It look like in four days you're like, oh wow, yeah, you're like look good. And then today I looked woke up and I looked

like like I was beaten severely in my sleep. But leaving yesterday, leaving the place, I was just like it felt the same as like you get a new haircut or something like you just feel literally more deserving of love. You're just like, I'm pretty like there's then going through the four day, does that spoil it for you? Or knowing that there's light at the end of the tunnel. It's kind of fun because it's like, oh my god, every day I wake up, I'm gonna be able to see.

And it's so subtle, like I got the They only put stuff on my lips because they did my under eyes. And and it's so weird. They put a canula. They inject a canula into your child. It's like it's like something that doesn't da. It's not a needle. It's a blunt end so it doesn't damage the tissue or like the under muscles or anything. So they do it through my cheek and then the needle went through the canyla into my under eye, and then they scored. I could

hear go and you're awake. I saw it happened. I was there, and can I tell you what happened? So there was a huge pool, like just this huge thing of blood they just went When they did this, it just goes put all the way down and they caught it on each cheek like a tearing blood my cheeks. Yeah it was. And I got the micro needling. Did you when No, when you got micro needling, did they take your blood out and then like rub your blood into your face? Oh? I didn't do that one, but

it's I loved it. Yeah, your face like beat up for how long? Because my face looks insane today? Like I put on a little bit of cover up so you can't really tell, but it's bad my Like I look like I had been in the sun for like a hundred several hours. Yes, yeah, but the after was great. I was really happy with it, and I think you will be to. Yeah, it was, it was, it was. It was really fun And shout out to nayak Uh

Plastic Surgery up in St. Louis. It's interesting that you have to like that someone figured it out that you have to beat the ship out of your face to make it look perfect. It's like going through cold to get to it. I don't know, it's just interesting, Like I don't know, like it's just like breaking your arm to make your arms. Yeah. That's the thing that's the college is me off, is that it just seems like

micro needling just came around in the last decade. I feel like and that is the smartest way to regenerate college wound. Yes, like tiny wounds. But I would wonder why sunburn doesn't do that, you know what I mean, because I think that damages as opposed to just hurting it. It's all about the underneath layers of skin. I think damaging the underneath is important. I'm obsessed with warts, and so if someone wants to give you their war, um, I do know that there is a technique called needling

for warts to to to help them. And if you have a wart, if you just stab it a bunch of times with a needle, like literally, they make it pulp like they just stab it. It's like they're like and there's doctor stab it. And so the body goes because the warts are really sneaky and they your immune

system doesn't know what they are. They kind of like hide out and then that's they get to grow in your immune systems, just like school, because it stays on the top layer of skin and it doesn't really cause your body to like go fight it, and that's why they grow. And if you stab it with a needle a bunch of times, it starts bleeding and it's like,

you know, something traumatic is happening down there. Your body's immune system goes, what the fuss going on down there, and then it sends help and then the word can heal, And so it's kind of a similar thing for your face, I think. But I did get my lips done, um,

and I wasn't planning on it. I usually just get botox to do a lip flip, and I got them done, and so they're really like luscious right now because they didn't put any filler in your lips, though they did they did, yeah, because they had some leftover from my eyes and she was like, you have a little bit left and I was like, so little, so little. They didn't do the bottom right, No, they did a little bit um. But last night it was like swelling up as I was hanging out with Chris and he was

just like and I put like. I was like, oh, I got my graniny andhing. I didn't tell him all the stuff I got time because who who? He doesn't need to know. And I was like putting a can on my lips. He was like, wait, did you get your lips done? And I was like, and he was just like, I thought something and he was like, wait, so is it gonna like be like that. I was like, now it's gonna go down. I was like, I swear to you. She even told me like they're gonna swell.

You're gonna think it's too much. But I promise she's not gonna be that way. And and I was like, do you like these dsls? And he was just like, get away. Like I just looked insane. My face was burnt, my eyes were puffing up. I looked like I get stung by bees. Like I was the opposite of hot. And he's just like he's seen me in some grizzly scenarios after some face stuff, and so I think he knows in four days kind of look amazing, so he can wait it out, you can be I think he

was just like, don't do this. You don't need to do this. And he's like, are you doing it for f boy? I'm like, kinda gonna be on TV and you know, and uh, I don't know. I've done it before. So and it's I get very minimal done and so but here's my question. When you get a lot of minimal, does it equal maximum? Eventually? Will it be? You know what I'm saying? See, like I think a lot of times, like we tell ourselves it's like a little microbe. Can

you overdo it? Can you overdo it? While doing a minimal Everyone that looks like a cat did not mean to do that unless they wanted the cat, but unless they look key case. But that's what I'm saying so now, but nowadays, I feel like with technology and stuff, you could do minimal. Like back in the day, my mom got a facelift and she looked like she got literally ran over by like nineteen fucking trucks, Like she was like coming out of the room like like like from

arrested Development. Yeah, we have to honor the women that paved the way for us, who gave up their faces for you to have done. Yeah, yeah it did. And my tima got it too. Um. It's just yeah, it's interesting when old when older people get it, because then it's like their kids are here, their faces here, so it's like it's a balance. It's just gonna keep getting better and better too. Let's get to the newsst Oh man, it's Wednesday, folks. You know what that means. Bob sag

it died Christ Just yeah, that's our new joke. It's probably no one likes it for us too, and Bob hated it. Uh. I hope you're having all those fells alright. A dying fifty seven year old Maryland handyman is the first person in the world to receive a heart transplant from a big He's doing well after the risky procedure. The orin side effects is he's rolling in mud and he's eating mafia dead bodies that they kill. I can't

believe the journalists wrote he's eating mafia dead bodies. Yeah, I know this journalist is very similar to someone else, but yeah, that was a joke that I told Noah yesterday. We laughed and I sucked it up today. Um yeah, so how do we feel about that? So this guy? Yeah, I mean they're using already. It's it's a genetically modified pig. They genetically modified the pig to give, you know, to have this kind of heart so that the human doesn't

reject another transplant. There's like three things they have to change in a pig heart. First, start using GMOs for like good stuff and not just to make our food taste. Yeah, just so our pig isn't bigger to eat. And I don't really understand what GMOs are it is another bad but it's um. So they made the pig grow kind of a heart that was good enough to How don't they do this all the time? Well, this is a yeah.

And why isn't this like on like the biggest news ever and kind it was on USA today it was it's on Andrew's news segment. That's true. Um, we do, we do have all the late Well they've been using pig valves so but now they're using the whole pig. Uh. The guy, the reason why he got it is he was he didn't so he was up for a hard transplant, but he didn't do anything. The doctor They were like, we're not giving you a human one because that could

go to someone that will actually treat him. Yeah, exactly, change their diet, will give you this pig one. Um. I like it. You know if if they offered it to me, I'd say, do you have a tofu and an impossible pig heart? Yeah? I think it's it's knowing my mother who needed a lung and she wasn't able to get it. Like the way to get on the transplant list is like you have to be healthy enough to handle it and sick enough to get it, so it's like almost impossible to be on the list. It's

like it's really hard. So now you know whatever, Like I think it's unbelievable Mom could get pig lungs. It would be so cool. What if she were really rich or really famous? Did did those people get bumped up? I mean absolutely, but honestly I don't think so. Because your family has some money, money wasn't an issue, right, so it would have been. But we're also not going to buy a hospital. Like I think there is a level of money, but you still need to want to

accept the lung and like, dude, it's fucking insane. Well you have to do after getting lungs or Jory and the chances of it. The reason why they don't want to give it to someone is because they don't want you to die and then them to either get sued or to be like, oh, only of our patients work for it statistics that they you know, it's their Yelp review afterwards exactly, like are you going to take care

of this? Because you're gonna it's like when um, you know, I think Abercrombie told the Jersey Shore people like they paid them to not wear their stuff because they're like, you're hurting our brands. So if we give it long to someone who's going to die right away, you're hurting our brand as this clinic that that's nothing to do with like them personally. Yeah, I mean everyone should get one in that case of like, hey, we don't care if our ratings three percent, as long as you know,

we give you a fighting chance. Do they consider like the good you're going to do in the world, like afterwards, like maybe if you were like, you know what I'm gonna I just started this organization that saves you know, And then they're like, well, I guess we'll have to close our doors if I don't get this heart. Yeah, pretty much. I think, Yeah, I think you might have some leverage there, But I don't know. I think, like

this guy, pigs lived to twenty years old. The pig was one years old when they gave him the heart. So I wonder if the pig heart will last twenty years. Pigs lived to twenty not the pigs, not most pigs that we have. I bet they lived to three at the most. Remember when they when they made an ear like a human ear, but it grew on a rat or something like, yeah, that was all. There's a photo of this, like, is there probably a dumb question? Did the pig was Did they used the pig's heart or

did the pig grow another heart on his back? Right? No, I think they used that pig. Cart they used that pig's heart. Now, there was a thing like twenty years ago a baby got a baboon's heart, but and then died a month later and grew a weird asked, did you guys read that article about the trans person that had been waiting forever for their penis to get a

new panut? Yeah, and then they finally had the penis constructed, and they were so scared because very often the penis doesn't take, like it dies and it was I never knew that. But it's the same thing like with an oregon. You have to hope that it takes. Like your body reject this. Tell you what dig rejects me all the time. Yeah, you've got a dead dick. Yeah, I have a dead pick. Just it's a transplant and I didn't I never told you this, and you just like draw stitch marks around

the base of it. Yeah, I got this dickt from sucking Gerbil when I was seven. I never grew I grew around it. It's really interesting trans surgery. Like I always heard that it's easier to dig a hole and build a pole. That makes sense. Yeah, yeah, it isn't early. They did a skin graph from the right thigh and like half the quadricept is gone. And why not use a condaver cock. I don't know. I like how you

couldaver though, said endeavor. It's a real I remember there was some guy that is a dead guy's COCKU died hard. My uncle TV chopped off his finger one time, like the you know, the end of his finger, and they sewed it to get the skin. They sewed it into his palm, so he was always doing like rock and roll, you know, until the finger grew the scot the skin and then amazing. Have you ever had a cut on your finger and you used to super blue and you

just push it together. It's truly works. Yeah. Yeah. The body is amazing, as I think, what is the point of your episode today? The resilience of the resiliency of the body. It's incredible. The bounce back of it. Yeah, your face has already bounced back. There's no evidence of any weirdness, but we always like, I can't believe a lizard can grow. It looks like I've eaten a lot of sodium. My eyes almost totally makeup on the bottom.

Or is that just can blue? Because if it's black and blue, you should bottle that because it looks great. What do you mean like underneath your No there, it's it's puffy here. But maybe there might be some runoff from my map. Maybe is there black and blue? Oh you have a tiny bit of it might be but um, yeah, it's they filled in this and I've been not wanting to get it, but I can feel it like it was always so hollow there and now I'm so excited to like it looks like you have a good night's sleep.

You know when it's done. You know those are called andrew these areas, they're called tear troughs. Oh yeah, tear troughs. That sounds like what a pig eats out of its crying. Um. The next be funny to just feed a pig like asparage is and they have it on like an all veggie diet, so it could be a healthy heart for humans. Yeah, I think they do eat fruits and veggies. Yeah, pigs to not eat mafia meat. How did you say it? Mad? Mafia meat? All right? Well, speaking of meat, uncut gems.

Actress Julia Fox and rapper Kanye West. She wrote this insane blog for what magazine? Was it? There's some interview interviews? Yeah, I think it was. And she wrote this insane blog that reads like a diary entry of a fifth grader. I mean, this girl is really dumb and no offense to her. She's beautiful and not everyone gets a great education or cares about being able to be a good writer. But um, it's so bad and I don't understand why why it exists? What it is? Can we read it?

Do you have it there? Uh? It just talks about I'm gonna miss Keeping Up. I've been watching Keeping Up. Wait. She wrote that she wrote about I was on the podcast, and this is what the article is about. I didn't know about this. So this is about how she was obsessed with keeping up with the Kardashians, how she never wants it to end, how was such a part of her childhood all this ship. That she's a die hard fan, you know, and now she's you know, dating Kanye, who

dated Kim. But I mean, I think a lot of people probably had that story, so it's a coincidence for sure. There was some article recently about people who ended up dating the people that they once said was like a crush of this. It's like the secret I guess. You know. Katie Holmes had once said, you know in the seventeen magazine that Tom Cruise was her like number one, and then there was like, oh god, there was someone else. Recently.

I was like, oh, that's a really cute story. Um. I knew a girl who was fifteen and obsessed with the singer of a band and then ended up marrying him years later, And I was like, that's creepy. It's always like a young girl being like I love to date this old guy, and the old guys like huh, Like, I know thirty seven now and you're married, but I have her boyfriend kind of. But listen, I'm sure he'd

understand Betty why I got you. Yeah, I like. But that's the thing, like I becoming That was why I wanted to be famous, was because I wanted to be able to pursue PC and Dave Matthews like not even and be friends with Jenn Franson like I wanted in I wanted that. It bothered me that those people exist, but I don't have access to them, and now I do. And turns out I'm living in St. Louis and all my friends and not super duper famous, and it feels

better that way. It'd be ye going to Bob's funeral are yeah, and on Friday and I'm just flying for the day. And uh, I was just telling Anya, like I and like there's a part of me that's dreading going because there's so like I get kind of anxiety around celebrities and like, I don't know, I just it's a lot of like just there's a lot who cares like I'm going because Bob would go to mine and it's I'll get to your great stories, and I honestly know it will be very therapeutic. But the only person

I would want to see is Bob's say. It's gonna be there. You know he's gonna be um uh no, not time um, but he's gonna be busy. You know he's going to be I mean, it's gonna be wild. I think'll be there. It's weird when you go to funerals because it doesn't really feel real until you see the body and then you're like, what the like this person is dead, like it just I don't know it. It's different, like yeah, it gives you. I guess it. Really, I know, I don't like it. I feel like I

can do without the closure. Well, I've always said funerals are the only thing you could skip of someone's and they won't be bad at you because they don't exist. But I usually go to funerals. If I go, you know what, that person would go to mind. And I know Bob would go to mind. I know he would. You know, I like a funeral. I don't need to see the body. I wouldn't mind tell my grandpa's body, I'm like, I don't even know looks weird. It doesn't look like he's also in like all like skater gear.

I just think the idea of putting my grandpa and this cap on sideways. Are you my grandpa's like, oh Luigi, I had a friend die. He was freaking. He overdosed when he was in Like the funeral was all people on drugs and like the person that talked was like dude, sucking Dan always charged it and he fucking dude. He was always at a party. He was always the fucking the dude, always up the latest and sucking any time we were sucking wakeboard? Is he's dead? I forgot about wakeboarding?

Oh god, yeah, parks when people die in your life. I was just I just actually had an exchange with Bob's wife on Instagram which I was like, I get really nerve us reaching out to people who are closest of kids to people who have died, because it's just like, I just don't feel like I can ever say the right thing. I don't they don't want to hear my sympathy.

I can't understand what they're going through. And but I did it because but it goes back to the thing of like everyone's doing it, so I shouldn't do it, and then maybe some people aren't doing it because they think that same thing. Yeah. I just I just feel like I'm I just don't smell Luigi and like what does that smell? I know he stinks that. I know I have to wash him. It's not gonna happen today. Poop. Oh you smell like poop? Do smell um? Do you? Guys? Like?

When who's been what's been the most significant like death in your life from celebrity standpoint. No, no, not just like anyone, because I was thinking about it, and I think this is the saddest I've ever been about someone's death. M and how lucky I am too, Like I think the younger they are, even if they aren't closer to you, it in tacks to you because you think of your own mortality. I guess. I literally had a friend died yesterday from college and we weren't that. He was a

year about me in my fraternity. He was a writer, he wrote this movie ship. Um fuck, I feel like an asshole. It's okay, it, yeah, but like he was such a party animal in college. But like just thinking about but I don't know, we don't know yet. I just found out, like I'm sorry, Yeah, I mean, I'm Brandon Murphy and he I mean also, I don't have complete confirmation that he's dead, right, maybe he maybe when people thought you died, yeah that's what we Oh my god,

I forgot about that. That was wild. But do you guys like I mean, I think my friend Roma ROMI I think was for you. Yeah. She was my best friend like fifteen years ago, for like a good eight years, and she's started going through rough times and and at a certain point, I was like, I gotta cut her off because she's she's clearly like she was just burning all these bridges and we were fighting all the time, and I was like, you're not in your right mind.

You need to like get your ships sorted out or and she did, and then we kind of never got back to normal. We were like acquaintances, and I really missed her, and then for years were out of touch and nobody knew where she was. And then and then she she met a terrible end alone, and in a way all of us were like, I guess she's better off. But it's never felt I never got to go to

a funeral. I never got to be there in the hospital at the end when things were getting really bad, and uh yeah, it's always like I have a lump in my throat about it. That's the one that hit me. The hartist. Did you do you like like looking at pictures and going through video and like, do you like revisiting it because I'm having a really hard time, Like I didn't. It was the first day that I looked at our text exchange and like, I wish I had more. I wish he wishes she had a laugh. Romy had

the best laugh. And the thing is, Heather McMahon sounds exactly like Romy sometimes, and they talked the same. They're the same vibe of like, you know what a fucking like. They have the same almost like southern like I don't know what it is, but they were feisty. So I listened to Heather mcmahn a lot because I'm like, that reminds me of Rommate, like the same reactions to ship.

It's weird. I was thinking about, though, you were talking about it yesterday, about how like when a celebrity dies, you hear about it a thousands or thousands of times. It's everywhere everywhere. This guy died. He was a writer. He wrote a movie that um again, I can't remember the name of it, but like he wasn't like a no nobody in per per se. You can't find it on the internet, like you would have to like literally

search out his death. So it's like a different kind of thing because one is like completely in your face and the other one it's like no one knows this. That's why I wouldn't you just say his name, because it's like when people die, we just like stop saying their name and then they just disapp here. It's like, um, my friend who killed himself in high school. It was before the age of the internet and everyone having Facebook,

or it was before it was before everything. And you look at you Google his name and there's like two things that come up, and I'm like, this is a person that, like God, I just want more of them. So I try to always say, you know, David Kinnaker, just to like keep it in the like keep the ball up in the air. Like, well, this guy was like I can't even describe how creative, even though he was an absolute nutcase in college. I love how you

can't describe it because you're not as creative. Yeah, but if I took a riddling, I hit Man's Wife's Bodyguard is the name of the movie I made up. No, No, that's the movie that he wrote, hit Man's Wife's Bodyguard. Like he did this thing like this will be an example of what he did. He took his whole room in the fraternity house and put it outside the bar exactly set up like it was in his room, like

at night. Like this was like the kind of like crazy, like he would he was the one that drove around the pledge like people that wanted the pledge of attorney and any raped four they saw. He gave him a baseball bat and said you have to knock the window out because he hated rap fours. Like one time he

was driving, he was throwing up sounds like person. I know they're all like horrible like stories, but they're also like what made him so unique and fun and and crazy to have the mind to be so creative in a way I don't know. He was Brandon Murphy. Brandon Murphy back with a more show right after this. Alright, we're back. Let's play Wednesday's wild card game. Um, literally

wild Cards. We love it. It's answered the Internet. It's the barstool sports game of kind of would you rather questions that we say, what kind of talking like because they're cool. And by the way, this game, let's the I played this game, um Bob. Bob wasn't there, but he was. I had these cards with me the last time, myself Bob. I don't know why that matters, but it was. It just reminded me that I played this game with We were waiting for Bob to show up at this

place that he met us. Yeah, I was in Milwaukee. I just was able. I didn't have any Bob stories. People keep asking me for Bob stories and they don't have any like stories because we just talked on the phone. We talked at clubs, we did television shows together. They were not like places for stories to happen. And I just you know what he the story is. He made me feel loved and I loved him like you know, and he made me laugh. But all of his jokes

were like I don't remember jokes specifically. Yeah, but I came up with a good story by talking to Anna about it yesterday. That is going to be in the l A times pace coming up, so I'll link that on things. And the song I wrote about him is going to be out probably tomorrow. Yeah, I'll be able to debut it on this show. Yeah, okay, sweet forever, on your move here, please, I'm on your please move. It is honestly, why not if I could live in

that building where Yeah, we'll look into the brickets. All right, Um, let's play answer the Internet. Here we go. Yeah, let's do it. Okay, Okay, prematurely come in your pants before sex or start crying mid sex? Whoa dude? Well, I do both all the time. Yeah, so if you got I'd rather premature cry while I come in my own face. Yeah, what about you on? You do I have to talk like that? Yeah? This is so patriarchal bullshit. This game is made under the assumption that women can't read right

or that women can't enjoy like want. No, there's these questions am I a dude? When I'm answering this and cry? Exactly? Crying is like such a pussy. We need to do fake questions too, because for a while we were doing would what We were doing these questions with me and my girlfriends on one trip this where we broke this game out and it was so much fun because it's like, would you read what's that? Would you wait? Would you rather? Would you rather your friends make funny or small dick

or go this derapy? Man? If one happened before the other, you know what I would do. I would suck my therapist dick and say, man, that's big. Yeah, okay, so but seriously, I would rather prematurely come, even though crying bring sex is not something I mind doing because it means it was so good and so connected weather. But also I come a bunch of times and usually the best orgasms follow the first one. So I'd love to pre muturely. Come, are you ready for this? Yad? Answer?

You ready for this one? Yeah? Buck? Are you really though? Hell yeah? Okay? You bang a slump buster? H it's another word for a whore, apparently, you know, it's another word for a girl that like brings you out of you just take whatever you can get to break you out of a slump of not talking. So you just take like the girl at the bar that no one wants, just to like, just to end your streak of note pussy slump buster. Or and she borrows your favorite shirt for the walk home, do you a let the shirt

go be bang her again to get it back? Why not see ask it for it back? That's not part of that would take communication in Boulgary. Yeah, um, definitely, because I never want to see that oh again. Hell yeah. And then don't want to see that shirt again. Because so you're gonna be working in finance and you're gonna get a job at JP Morgan and buy as many shirts as you want without that slump buster. What's your favorite shirt, Andrew? The one? That shirt is a slump buster.

That is true, that's what they call my fat tits underneath it? Okay, slump buster if okay, this is honestly like one you could make up for this game. If you could fuck any girl you want for the rest of your life, but you can only ever watch women's sports, would you do it? Honestly? Probably not? Because fuck, have you ever seen a woman do a layup? Boo boo? Bitch God. This is under the pretense that, first of all, men only can enjoy men's sports. Women's sports are awful

to watch. Um. And this is for single men too, because no man is going to be able to answer this seriously because he anger his girlfriends. Yes, it cracks me up that men think they could get the hottest

girl anyway for life. Well. I had this joke for a while that I want to put in my next special, but it's you know, after I hooked up with a guy, he was like, we were on his TikTok and I was just like cuddling up next to it watching him go through TikTok, which is kind of a fun thing to do to watch someone else because it's such a solitary thing. You get to like see someone's habits. And one of j low came up and he was like, God,

she's so fucking hot. And I was like, can you not say j Lo is hot while your semen is still in my upper digestive tract? And he was like, where you're semen, where my semen is is in your in your body has no bearing on the fact that j Lo is hot. No matter where it is in your body, j Loo will still be hot. And I was like, and then my joke is why do I keep dating autistic men? And I was like, just I

don't want to hear that anyone's hot. And my point was, uh, I go and of course jo is hot, that's like not a unique thing, but these guys actually do think you don't. And he's like, I'm not gonna like fucking date Jelo. Why why are you jealous? And I'm like, well, of course you're not going to. You're a loser who is an alcoholic and makes bad decision fu Jelo might like you. Now, how far does to come have to

get down your system before he can say she's hot? Um, you know, not just not post coitus, you know what I mean? Give it thirty five minutes. I'm a cool chick when it comes to hot girls. I like it, but I don't need to hear it right when we're literally I can still taste it in my mouth. I mean, TikTok's kind of funny because you know it will it will give you things they think you like, and you

have no control of what's gonna pop up. And you're watching in front of your significant other and a hot girl will show up and you'll swipe faster and Brent, it's like, I can watch the whole video. You don't have to hide her tips like I can handle tips. Yeah, it's funny though, like guys will like swipe swipe quick because because you think that she thinks that if you watch the whole thing that you're that means you want to suck her. But also she probably would found a

little bit. Probably, yeah, I mean, but also the fact that you go past it faster means yes, yes, it's nothing good. Yeah, you can't win. You can't win. You gotta watch three quarters of it. Okay, you ready for that? Would you rather he watch your dad fuck a hundred year old man or b watch your mother kill someone? Fucking I'd like to see my mother killed. Yeah, nice, Um, I'd rather watch my mom kill someone yes, it's not

even close. Yeah, although again with my dad getting he's a good point is your dad dad's bottom and he's getting old men, So I'd have to see all seven of them. I had to drink. My dad told people he was on he was doing an SNL monologue, and I was really heartbroken that he didn't call me for advice on his monologue. God only knows what that means. But during his my sister told me Nikki Dad lied and said that Cheryl Crowe texted him and said, hey,

watch my performance tonight. And then we were like, and then my sister goes cho Crow didn't text you, and he was like, yes, she did. And then she's like, then show me the text. And it was in front of all these people that it came out that he did not she did not text yes, And so we found out that my dad was lying about being friends with Cheryl Crowe. And it was like this watershed moment that my sister's like, dad has so many dark secrets. That was such a weird thing to lie about because

we knew he knew show Crow, but we didn't. We were like, there's no ways she was like texting him. And then I go. Maybe he didn't show the text because they are actually having an affair and it was easier to sit And in my mind I came up with like a pretty good plot that you think someone's lying because they're like, fine, she didn't text me, but they can't show the text because the text is actually more the thing they said. Isn't that kind of an

interesting twist that I came up within my dream. The text exists, but it's yes, like they were texting. She did say I'm gonna be sweetie, I'm gonna be on TV tonight. I love you so much, fuck your wife. Or he sets up a new phone number and even sends a fake one from Cheryl Crow. That's not as bad as the first cut is the deepest? Are you ready for this one? Is sex with can joined twins? A threesome? Yes? What if the other one just fucking

reads a book while you're getting head um? Still a threesome. They're in the room and they're like being penetrated. What if you only on the left side of Fine, it's it's a two and a half. It's a d aid to me. I guess it depends how much twin is there.

If it's a fooking joiner, like just like another head. Yeah, well, what about if a woman is pregnant, is it a threesome because the baby is technically there's a living thing based on how you view when a child is a lot like what a nine months like a nine month pregnant like about to pop? Woman, you fuck her and the baby you know could survive, Like maybe she's due tomorrow. That baby. No one would argue that baby is not a life. I think no one would go you can abort,

you know, there's no question of it. Is that okay to do? None of this is okay. I think it's a mad woman if she has a question is over the line. But yeah, jesus, I don't think the baby can can you eltrated by its lift? Wait, I see what you're saying. Can can join twins have kids? Yeah? Unless I can joined. At the ute, we are acting like we know anything. We gotta get to final thought. Um, can I just share the last text conversation I had with Bob? Yeah, and what's better boneless wings or bone

or wings? This is obviously? I was like, obviously, I know I'm getting a little Bob heavy on the show this week, but I think it's all for no one would deny me this. Um. Also, the person that informed me about Bob Saget's death that I said was very like flippant of like, o MG, Bob Saget's dead, and like did on a group text. He wrote to me and said, Nikki, I am so he didn't hear the podcast where I talked about it. He wrote to me and said, Nikki, I'm so sorry that I said that.

I did not realize you were so close to friends. I saw your Instagram posts and that was just such a bad move. And I said, I did the same thing. You know, I told it on the podcast. I did the same thing with someone who knew Burt Reynolds. So it's it's so nice that you said this to me.

It was so nice. But um, a couple of things I just wanted to say about Bob last night when I was watching my special and I was kind of having that moment of like, I'm might put out I might have to put out something that I'm not like a plus about tight And usually you know, if if something is this TV show, that's not because Chris was like, but you did not say if that got canceled, you still have a career, nickid' sayre alive that guy cancels?

You still like these things? People will forgive you when I go. But I've never put out something that's only me on stage, Like I don't know, I can always go that was Sarah's fault, Like I didn't say that, but like, you know, that was MTV's fault. They didn't let us do what we wanted. That was Comedy Central fault. You could always blame someone else, but this is just me,

you know, everything is me. And I was like, god, I feel like it was weird because I was like he was trying to comfort me about it, and he was doing a good job, but I was like, I really want someone who has been in the business a long time, who has put out some stinkers in their life, was put out some things that maybe didn't make a big splash or that they weren't that proud of. And I was like, Bob, Bob would what would Bob say?

And I don't think that I would have thought to think of Bob had it not been this week and I didn't end up sobbing last night and being like what do I do? I want to not put it out because Bob what Bob would say, and I think he did advise me right before was filming the special. I was like, Bob, I don't even know what I'm doing for the special. It's up two months away. It was a month away when we last spoke, and I was like, I literally don't want I'm doing for it?

How do you do? Like what are you doing to prepare? Because he was about to do his and he was like, Nikki, I've put out I think he even said I have the you know, I haven't watched the FaceTime recording of our last conversation, which I do have, but I think within it he told me like, you're gonna put out things in your life that you are not ape like Tom Hanks has put out things that are not a plus. It's like it's gonna be okay, You're still lovable. Like

Bob would not judge me for this. And I'm really actually sad that Bob's not gonna be able to see the special and I'm going to dedicate it to him. I hope that's not like over the top, but it is the last thing. Can I just play this is what Bob's did I play? This is what Bob said about me one week ago on a podcast. Um this was on a Corporate Time with Tom and Dan and um, so they're talking about Bob being filthy and he's like,

I'm not really that filthy anymore. So this is uh called a Corporate Time with Tom and Dan and it's from uh last Wednesday's episode that I don't even some people go kind of logical in their dialogue. I'm I'm like, wow, Nicky Blaze as a friend of man, I'm like wow, Yeah, I was like that. I was. I did that on

an HBO special and I got in trouble for that. Yeah. Yeah, like we we uh we Actually we've had Niki on the show and then Sam and I just saw her and yeah, it's funny because she is awesome, but and she's so and that's those are the people that I plied to. I mean, and then it trails off. But it's so nice that he said I was awesome on something. Well, you know, last time I saw him, I went to dinner with his It was after our shows in Milwaukee. I went to dinner with his. His in laws were

in Milwaukee and they came to his shows. We were both in Milwaukee. Performing. He was at the improv, I think, and he did two shows. So we went to the go to the hotel when we were going to meet and and I went with all my friends and then you guys didn't come so mad you didn't come now, but who cares, It's fine. And then um he met up and his in laws were gonna be there, and I was like, what's it gonna be like with his

in laws? Like this is gonna be weird. They were so cool and like, so he didn't he wasn't different at all. I thought it was gonna get like a different version of him because he's gonna be all buttoned up. But he was so cool. And then, um, so I posted a picture and he was like, there were a couple of pictures taken, and you post one of me so sweetly on your Instagram. But I feel like I look like a cabbage patchman. Do you have the closer shot of us? Or do you hate it? It's if

so you don't want to see it or something. I just wanted to post something if there are were any other picks that you're okay with that I don't look like Bob Evans and Nick Nolty had a child, I said, it was the only one. The guy took more, but they were all bluryous. Hell, I'm sorry, I thought you looked good. I think you have body Bobby body slash Bobby dysmorphia. He said, yeah, I may may air brush myself a turtleneck on or something. Blurry is good at concept,

but probably not. Ha ha ha. I look much better today photo shop, he said. Really great to see you and Todd Berry. It was weird, he tweeted, where's the after party? He we didn't see Todd Berry. Isn't it strange that some people still think Twitter and Facebook is like emailing someone? I said, Um, I invited Todd Berry. He couldn't come anyway the way I said, And I truly don't think you know how handsome you are. You look great. Last night was so fun. Thank you for

having me and my friends love you. And Kelly's parents are so cool. Love them, he said, thanks for the compliments. Really nice. Helps my mojo for my shows. Break a leg tonight, it'll be fun. Indeed needs you. I was going to Indianapolis that day. And thanks for the sweet comments. Regarding Kelly's parents. Yes, they're like a scene from Moonstruck and f y I. I texted blah blah blah and emailed the executive producer blah blah blah for this show.

I think they're all booked for this season, but I don't know anyway. Blank loved the idea, and I sang, your deserved praises. Have fun, safe travels in the van and I said, oh my god, thank you, Bob. I truly treasure you. He said same, You're the best. We must be related if you trace our descendants back to being exterminated in Russia. Have a great time tonight, I think, so listen, I'll have him take that memory to the

great I said, I'm not going. Oh and then I told him about a show that we were going to do and he said, yeah, I can't do it either. Didn't sleep, so I can't either, But thanks for thinking of me. How is India? I said, so good. Thanks, I'm exhausted, though, He said, I hear you or read you. I haven't slept at all on plane with some guy who just farted in my face. They need these masks to have fart repellent in them. I said, ha ha ha, God, that's disgusting, and he said he should have his butthole

stitch shut hate him happy. Indy was great. Yes, it is a great comedy town. And that was the last thing. And I didn't anything back. I just wish I would have written something. But that was a good exchange. I told him I loved him and treasured him. Yeah, it's a nice exchange. And I think it I don't know, and incumbents your whole friendship. I think, yeah, yeah, I

don't know. You never know what what's going to be the last thing you're gonna write, you know, and if it's you're not gonna write like you always were the one that I loved. Everyone keeps saying every time Bob wrote me it was like the I love yous. We're

just streaming through like that. I we were always like fighting to say who said I love you the most last I Actually, you know, my exchange with his wife was that she was like, I don't have any regrets of how much we both said we love each other, and what a beautiful thing you'd be able to say. Um. So I guess it's just a reminder. There's like someone kind of occurred to me when we were doing this podcast of like if something happened to them. I would

really regret how it is right now with them. And it doesn't mean I need to be best friends with this person, but I would like them to know that I love them and you or something happened to me, I would want them to have that or whatever. So maybe just we do something with that today. Tomorrow, hopefully we will have the debut of the song song for Bob that I wrote some lyrics to, but Matt Pond

and On Your Marina helped me. Matt wrote it, Matt wrote that song right yes, and um, oh my god, by Bees is the new band, fake band that we made up. But I think we'll debut on the podcast tomorrow and then we'll we'll be able to put it on spot of by or like will it just SoundCloud? Yeah, well let's work on that today, okay. Cool. Um, so look forward to that. Thank you so much for listening, and um, thank you for all the continuing messages that

you guys have said. It's so nice. People are writing to me that are like, I lost my dad a week ago. I know what you're going through, and I go, oh my god, no no you don't, because it's not the same. I'm it's people are so fucking nice to write me when they lost that. It's just everyone's so nice.

I love our listeners. I love you guys. I love you so much, and I hope you know that I love I love the girl that wrote a message saying that she googled a bit by Bees while we were talking about because she thought it was a real band to look up there it should be maybe that will be the name of my like my name. Yeah, your alternative whatever? Um, that's like a sweeten Are you putting your coffee? Oh my god, that's so good. It's a vegan honey alternative from Nicky Glazer. Oh my god. Okay,

let's do it. Guys. Thank you so much for listening. We gotta go. Don't be ca And yeah, you've done that one again. Send us Jack recommendations, you guys. I'm really out of it.