#154 Fruit Roll-Up and Fanthrax

see you in fifteen minutes. When I come in here first alone, he just like he goes and he's so excited, and he just likes to sit next to me. It's so cute. He just likes to be close. I was watching videos. He's a little Mike. Your your head is a Mike. What did I say in that video? I go, oh, I kiss your head? Your head is Your head is a little Mike. Your head is Mike. Um. I love him so much. I was watching read it last night on the subreddit make Me Cry. I just needed to

cry last night. I was feeling a lot of things and I wanted to watch porn to make me cry, not actual porn, but like cry porn, you know, and the subreddit make me cry. It misses the mark so much. People are only supposed to post things that make them cry there, and I'm like, people are fucking babies, like it'll be just like, I don't know, I don't cry about um. It's funny what triggers people to cry. I don't cry when UM mentally challenge people get into college

or something, or like when that kind of thing. I'm happy for them and it's sweet, but I don't. There's certain things though, like letters from dead people to people who are living, or like I'm so proud, things where the person is proud. There's just one great video of this kid who's doing a makeup tutorial and he's a boy, you know, or he you know, he presents as a boy at least in this video. You but he's doing his makeup and he's in his room and he's kind

of maybe streaming on Twitch or something. I don't even know what the kids do, and um, all of a sudden, you see him get like scared a little, like like something off cameras happening, and the captain already tells you what's going to happen, but I'm not gonna tell you. So I knew what was going to happen. But his dad walks in and you can hear like a man's voice and it's all in Spanish or Portuguese. I don't know which one, but it was I think the Spanish,

and so I couldn't understand it, but it's subtitles. And he's like, hey, what are you doing? And the kid turns off the ring light and he's just in the dark, and his dad's like, what are you doing? And he's like, oh, nothing, you know. His dad's like, what are you doing? What are you hiding over there? And he then he just

is like I gotta show him. And he's like a probably fourteen, he's this glam makeup on, you know, and he turns on the light and his dad goes, that's great, and he's like like, looks so ashamed, like he probably has been caught kind of before doing that. They're not caught, but like his dad is probably aware, but it's not something they've confronted like in this way. That's kind of the vibe I got. And his dad is just like, hey, come here, you look, you look great. I love you.

I don't I just want you to be happy. You do anything that As long as you're doing things that make you happy, I'm okay with it. And it's just this sweet and they both cry and are hugging each other, and it's this moment, this watershed moment. Then they've both

been dancing around. But you know, there's something about coming out that I don't envy obviously having or like you know, whether you're trans, or whether you're gay or by seth, whatever you are, and you have to like announce it to your family, and it's this thing maybe they've suspected or we're just having to tell your parents anything hard like that about your identity that maybe they won't understand and they could possibly reject you, which happens a lot.

I have a trans friend um who is my makeup artist. Her name's Dita, and she just transitioned, like I think in August she started, and like her dad won't talk to her, and like her mom is very like just like, oh, you know your dad. You know, it's like you just risk so much. And I've said it before, but I think trans people are the bravest people in the world, and that we doubt that they are doing this for any other reason, that it's truly who they are. Is

it absurd? Because why would you invite that into your life where you know people you love the most could turn their backs on you. Why would you do that, um, if you weren't just trying to be yourself and do what's in you. So I just don't get people that

don't understand it. But that's beside the point. I think that kind of piggybacking off of the talk we had yesterday about conversations with your parents, like hard conversations are not enviable in that way that they're hard, and like you just want to be who you are and not have to like sit your parents down to tell them.

But there's something special about those I watched those videos where a kid will come out to his mom or and I know I only watch the videos where it's positively received, and it's like some kind of like trumpy type mother that you think is going to not have that response, but it's just like, I love you and just holds her son's gay head to her bosom and they just cry in the kitchen and it's just the

kids looks like a Rosanne kitchen. You know, like there's those moments that I'm just like, that is so sweet that they get to have those, um because they have this thing they have to tell. Like I told my parents last night that I was anxious, Like I came up to my parents last night as anxious attached um No, trying to explain that book. I did a good job

of it. I think it is. I think it is just pertinent to understand that as humans, we would rather be right about the story we tell ourselves about ourselves, even if that story is were unlovable. We'd rather that check out in our relationships validate that than to actually have loving relationships that would invalidate We'd rather be right than loved. I feel like Oprah right now, we'd rather be right then left. But that really is like, that's insane.

And once you are able to acknowledge that, that's when you can start choosing being loved over being right. But if you're in the if you're in the dark about this thing that you keep doing, which is choosing the wrong people because they validate up thing about you, and you realize that you're just doing it because you want to be right about yourself once you realize that it's like, um, the back Pain book that I always talk about, you don't have to heal the trauma that's causing your back

pain up in your head. You don't have to go and like you know this back pain book called Healing

Back Pain. If you have anyone in your life suffering with back pain, no matter what it is, whether it's from a car accident, whether it's from they tore a disk or bulged vertebrate, whatever it is, it's the pain is uh intensified by your mental anguish that find that reroutes your brain can't handle like being a human and how much it sucks living in a modern world where we just want to just funck everything and scream and be violent and like, but we can't because we have

to put on clothes and smile. And it's fucking awful and and your body, even even if it's not like you're dealing with a molestation or something like fraud like that, maybe it's just the book. The Backpain Book says people have back pain because they just want to grab, Like when you're a baby, you just get to grab things. You know, you know I want that, and you grab it.

And then as a human, oftentimes you want to grab things, you know, like like a baby would, but you can't because you're an adult and you can't just grab things. And so the mental anguish of I can't grab that thing I want to grab at ask permission, I can't have the thing I want. You have to read. That's so it's too much for your brain to handle, and

so it tucks it away. And then that thought travels through your body and finds the weakest spot that you already have pain going on, because why not just find that place? It finds the speaker for the pain. Like think of your little like the bulging disk or a pain nerve, or you know, a muscle strain as like a speaker, and it fucking cranks up that volume. Whereas that pain it's real, but it's from your mind, and

the injury is real. You do have a bulging disk, but the pain that you're experiencing from it is way worse than it's supposed to be. And that's what this doctor realizes. These people with chronic back pain from slipped from bulging disks or all these things, it was all it didn't make sense that they were in this much pain this physiological thing is the nerves at that area are not being triggered in the way that they should

just from the physical abnormality. But that's what you So that's what you do when you when you really But the thing that the trick of the book is as soon as you actually accept that and that you can tell yourself, my back pain is my mental anguish, it doesn't invalidate it. It's still pain. You can still get sympathy for your back pain, but it's up in your head.

And as soon as you are okay with that, and you can be okay with it, just like you're okay with like, oh I fell, and that's why my hip cooke. As soon as you don't feel like, oh that makes me like crazy, it doesn't make you crazy. As soon as you can accept it, the pain goes away. You don't even have to treat the thing that you're anguished about. You acknowledge that it's that way, and it goes away.

And what they found was, you remember when everyone got um ulcers in the eighties, it was like the thing like stress causes ulcers, remember that, like the correlation. For some reason, they linked stress to ulcers. As soon as they did that, ulcers dropped because as soon as someone is able to just know what causes it and know that it's not their fault, but that it's that it's the it's a thing that they do have control over, or that it's not even they have a control of

it for whatever reason. Just knowing that it's that and really accepting it, not just reading a book and being like, Okay, I guess it's that. Truly knowing that when your back hurts, there's something else going on and you don't even have to you even as a break up with the guy or you know, cry about the guy. You just have to acknowledge that that is it. And then it goes away and you should treat those things because it will

keep coming back, but it goes away. So what I'm saying about this book is is that when you when you being honest and getting honest about things is truly the thing that has helped me more than anything in the world overcome anything I want to is getting brutally honest. That's why I get applauded all the time. It's like, Nick, you're so honest, because it's on the other side of

honesty is freedom. Even though being honest can be really embarrassing, and you have to face some things about yourself that are really, like truly horrifying. But when you're able to be honest with them to yourself, just in a notebook,

you don't even tell anyone. Um. Although better help is a sponsor of ours, and I do recommend if you want to get therapy and tell someone and just release these sins like or these character defects that aren't even your fault, you know, like you didn't choose to be whatever you are. You you didn't choose your brain. So we were able to get these things out. You can be free. What was that? So? What happened with your

parents yesterday? So this is the thing that I wanted to say about it is that me getting honest about Listen, I'm anxious attached, and I keep attracting people to me that validate that I'm unlovable and that people will leave me and abandon me because that is my core belief about myself. I know that, and I know that I'm wrong about that, but there's something in me that really believes that to be true because of you know, just my diagnosis, my self diagnosis is anxious attached anxious attached

people does it's not. It's not because it's true, and it's not because we're bad people. We really feel unlovable. And now that I've acknowledged that, I'm seeking out people that validate that belief about myself. All I have to do is acknowledge it, and now I know, and now I can do the opposite, and the opposite will come naturally to me. Like you know, I'm I really want the relationships that I facilitate from now on, whether it be the one I'm currently in or the one that

you know, my friendships, colleagues, I want. I want those to feel good and to not trigger my abandonment response, because when I get fucking crazy about a guy or a friend or a person colleague who doesn't like me or someone, that person is avoidant and it's their own thing and I need to keep I need to like, I don't need to be mean to them. I don't need to burn the bridge. I just need to not pick that up because that is going to make me. That's like picking up a knife. Like a knife is

not going to make me feel good. If I hold it and sleep with it at night, it's always gonna cut me. It's because it's a knife and it can't help but be a knife, and a knife would go well with of a knife cover. I don't know that someone else would be better for the knife. Does that make sense? Um? And so I told my parents this last night. I came out as anxious attached, and my dad was like, I wouldn't want to date anyone that talked like this, like like that you're talking like because

I told him. You know what this book is kind of teaching me is that I need to I'm okay to need things that I'm okay to say. Listen, I get really fucking stressed out if I don't hear from you, because I as soon as I get close to someone, my brain tells me they're gonna leave me, and I'm and then I start frantically searching for reasons why you're gonna leave me, And so a thing that isn't even an indication that you're gonna leave me, I will interpret it that way. And so just know that I'm kind

of crazy. And the only thing you need to do, you don't need to do anything, be yourself because I'm only going to be with a secure person that is only gonna mistakenly make me, make me feel anxious. That doesn't mean I won't interpret it that way. Avoiding people actually actively do that to you. But a secure person might sometimes slip up because they you know, they're busy, they can't call you back, and then you, as an anxious person, start going, they're gonna leave me. I have

to tell that secure person that I'm with. I'm going to spiral sometimes and be like really insane, but I promise you it goes away like that. If you just say, hey, I was busy, Like the second you assuaged my fears and tell me the truth, I'm okay. I'm not going to keep harping on it. Because anxious attached people, that's the beauty of them is that they go this is oh my god, he's he's so mad at me. And then the second the guy's like, oh sorry, I was

in the bathroom. Oh gone, it goes to zero. It doesn't go to twenty, doesn't go to forty, goes to zero. And so really, I'm an awesome person that just gets anxious a lot, and all that I need to do to feel better is to have someone be honest with me and love me. And that's not too much to ask. And I told my dad, like, he's like, I would never want to be with a woman who's because I said, you know, anxious attached people. They count the number of

phone rings before it goes to voicemail. They count the hours you know since he last texted. They county they see that. Oh he looked at my first Instagram story, but then he stopped watching, so that's he's trying to avoid me. He probably accidentally saw the first one and was like, shit, I don't want her to think I'm interested, and then he flipped off of it. So I think that way because I know that I sometimes do that stuff,

that that's just the way I am. I cannot help that, and I don't want to be in a relationship that I don't have to, Like I want to be able to on with those things and just acknowledge them and go just like my messiness, like this isn't a great thing about me, but it's true, and if you love me, you're gonna just tolerate it. And I'm going to do my best to not to like keep working on this to become secure. But in the meantime, I just I

might get a little bit insecure. Sometimes I need you to know that and it's nothing against you, And all you gotta do is hold my hand, like my the guy I'm dating now, sometimes I fear if he gets mad at me, he's going to break up with me. And I told him, you're allowed to be mad at me. But when you if you don't think it's something where you're gonna break up with me, will you just hold my hand when you like, or will you just touch

me under this? If we get into an argument, then just touch me and that'll be a code word for this isn't going to ruin us. Sometimes you can't say that you're so mad in a fight you don't want to be like, listen, I'm not gonna break up with you over this, but I go just touch me. It's a way to let me to just ease my anxiety. It's a thunder blanket, the thunder jacket for thunderstorm in

my fucking heart. And he does that now, so like when he does, he has to bring up something that's upsetting him and I start going like, oh my god, this is he's done. You know, he'll just gently like put his hand on my like hold my hand, and I'm just like I. My heartbeat just goes back to normal, which is already low because I have um Brady Brady cardia. UM. But yeah, like I, it was annoying because my dad didn't get it. He's like, you need to hide this

part of yourself. No guy's ever gonna want that. And that's what I met so much with. And my family was, you know, my aunt Linds saying, no guy's ever gonna date someone who eats like you. No boys ever, my mom's, no boy's not gonna want to go into a room. That's Taylor Swift posters everywhere. No one's gonna want a girl that is open about being anxious attach. No one's gonna want a girl that talks about hookups on stage. Well, that's who I am. And if you don't want it,

then fuck it. And I told my dad last night that I'm looking for a guy who, you know, either is passionate about his work or you know, is someone who can be like a homemaker role for me and not work because I have enough money and I could support someone. And my day goes so, no man's gonna want that. Men like to work, And I go, oh, um, actually that's you can't speak for all men. He's like, no, man, he's gonna be a fucking he's gonna be a he

didna say. He goes, he's gonna be a pushover. That's like a little and I go his mama push over because she doesn't work, but she so she's a pushover. And he goes kind of and I was like, okay, well now we know how you feel. No, he didn't like pushover. He said, um something like that that I go, well, is every woman that doesn't work just I go running a household, cleaning a house, making it presentable, hiring people to keep it presentable. Uh, investing my money and things

that that that to me is sexy. I'm that's not good. I go, well, you know what, a secure man could not work and be okay with it and not be a little moot little bit living off of me. And that's a secure man that wouldn't feel gay because a woman's taking care of him. So fuck you, dad, No, I love my dad. We had a really good concert last night. On on Instagram, Nikki Glazer pot thank you for watching everyone. Let's get Andrew in here. He's visiting

us from Michigan, where he is with Brenna's family. Andrew, Let's do it, Andrew? What up? What up? Live from Michigan. Yeah, oh my god, I just drove through like it was like the North Pole. I thought I was going to run over polar bears and get fucking attacked by sea lions. It was wild. What I just drove through? Oh? Really? Blizzard? Yeah yeah, I mean the most blizzard blizzard I've ever I couldn't believe it. Like Dairy Queen, yeah, but even

more mixed. Yeah, it was wild. Um, you know dude that if you are risking your life to make it to the podcast on time, we'll just we can do it. It's a You're not gonna be replaced. I don't want you to. You could have just pulled over. You shouldn't drive in conditions that are I shouldn't tell you what to do, but like, what were you? Was there a part of you that was thinking maybe I should just

wait until this passes. Um? Branna just kept reassuring me, don't be a pussy, you know, yeah, no, no, she I felt. You know what happens is is when the trucks pass you on the left side, it gets they it forms a cloud that you you literally can't see the road like it. And then it's I that's when you pull over. Man, I guess you're on the highway. You can't pull on the shoulder. Well, it's funny, she's like,

you know, they tell you. They're like, you know, when you go on the bridge, that's where you getting icy. But and if you start um like spiraling out, don't do this to the wheel and pump your brakes, don't slam them. And it's like, this is not this, that's this shouldn't be a thing, you know what I mean? These measures should They're not a woman giving birth in the back seat and have to get to the hospital.

This is we should just not be driving right now. Yeah. Yeah, but I guess they would never get anywhere then, you know, because I feel like things pass or you could have a car that you know is better in the snow than a Corolla. Yeah that you haven't checked the tire pressure? Probably, Well, I guess Brenda took you in for an oil change, So what's your tire pressure in your car? I have people take it if you know, I look at the tires and if they look bad. I just took it

in to get inspected. So they do all that, you know, And if I'm driving my mom's car and snow, I literally pull over at a gas station and wait, I've done it before on the road when I have gigs. It's just I get too scared in the snow. Dude, Yeah it was wild. You look like Eddie Murphy raw or delirious. Yeah. Juicy Coutour gave me, um a suit,

you know, like a jumpsuit. So I have the pants and the top, and I wore it to my showing St. Lou My Theater show in St. Louis because I thought it was like a cool thing to show up to the gig in. But I've never worn it since then. And today I was, you know, low on activewear pants and I've gained some lbs, and so, um, I decided to put on this thing because it's like a sweat pant. But god damn it, it's tight. I mean, it is

not an attractive look on the bottom. It's not a good but the suit is so cute and Juicy is back by the way, so two thousand's it's um not great, to be honest, it's it's like kind of um it's a vlore. No, it's not vlor It's I can't describe it. It's like plastic e sweatshirt that makes sense, Like it's like coded sweatshirt. It looks not what it looks like like I look, Oh my god, yes it's shiny. I look like a fruit roll up. God, damn it. I

just went to I went out like this. I went to Starbucks in the night, stopped at a store, you know, that little gift shop around the corner from us. Did anyone go I want to eat your fruit by the foot or your foot by the fruit? Is my feet or gross? I've got I've got a four at a ten on Wiki feet. I keep saying, have a nine point five on wiki feet. But that's just my size? Is that with? Oh dude, my some please you guys go log into wiki feet and get my score up.

Like it's just not fair. I am being you know, discriminated against because of my bunnies. Um So, I went to this gift store, but you know that cute little one around the corner, right, Yeah, yeah, it looks like a New York like Christmas ee like gift shop, right, And I went in there and they had great tunes. This guy was just playing. Um I went in because the they were blasting like cool Nick Low. I didn't even know who nick I mean, I know him from like I think he sings that Pink Moon song, but

he maybe not. But Nicolo, I've never heard of him, or I've heard of him, but I've never listened to his music. And I was like, who is this? I felt like I was in um high fidelity. I was like, God, I'm so cool being like what's this record man? Because he was at a record player and it was this awesome song called um fuck get into it. It's Nicolo and it's called I Forget It Now. I put it on my Instagram story. But it's so good anyway, Um, this guy took so long wrapping up all the gifts.

I literally put all the stuff. He was taking so long that I go, I'm gonna go grab my Starbucks and be right back. I came back and he still he was helping another customer and and chatting them up. And I'm standing there watching and I'm just like, I have to be back to the podcast because I had to do this. I'm just like, I cannot believe how long this is taking. And then I leave the store and one of the main items that he wrapped up. That was a hundred and something dollar tray I bought.

He didn't even put in the bag, and so I have to go back there. He did give Luisgi three treats, but man, people are slow and just take their time. And yeah, it's like eating and just because you left doesn't mean he gets to stop. Like just I thought I gave him like, hey, I thought it was a way. I wasn't trying to be passive aggressive. I was really like, take your time, like I'm gonna go. But I thought he might read that as like, oh, she's she's on

the she's gotta go. Um. But people just don't pick up on things, and that's fine. They're not anxious attached. I'm very h aware. He's very avoidant. Yeah, how was your car ride with two avoidance? Uh? It was so funny. We were like, you know what, it's a eight hour car ride. Oh yeah, you guys thought you were gonna do it in one one trip. Yeah, well we thought that too, And then I had until like five, I had a full on panic attack. She had to drive

most of the way at the first leg. I had like it was It's the worst I've had it made me like swallow another off to being like okay, maybe it's not best to do to get off one and just whatever. Like Yeah, there was a lot of reasons why it happened, but it was to the point where like I felt very detached and I was like looking at her and I couldn't like connect with her, Like she didn't even seem like a human being to me.

It was fucking I was I was going through, Yeah, it's just been so long and like but then that thing of someone doesn't look like a human being. I look like a human It's hard to explain, Like you just don't feel like like present with them, like you can't stop your brain. And then like I would look at Barnes in the distance like different like like objects and they were so like color, like so sharp, Like it was so hard to explain. It's hard to explain.

But everything, everything, when did it start out? At it? Uh? Because I just think people relate so much and I'm always very curious about these and with no judgment, I'm asking like what brought it on? Like what did it feel like? What what was going on? Um? You know, I I really I think there's I think it's Uh, the idea of meeting her family is probably a little bit in there. Summer think driving eight hours is in

there somewhere. I think. Uh, I spent all day cleaning out that back room closet, which is a fucking goddamn disaster, and I didn't really sleep that well the night before. I mean there's a lot of different you know, I'm weaning off Zoloft, I'm getting on well Buchre, and I just got the booster shot like a day and a half ago. I think that was maybe so like so many things and so, but how did they come on?

Did you feel it like, oh wait, this is familiar or were you in denial of it because it's been so long, Like how did that work? Well? My first thought was like I can't get off zolof Like what am I thinking? I gotta get in touch with my doctor. It's because the well future, Well what is the thing that made you feel that thought? Like your heart start beating or like you started panicking about a paint, like how did it come on? Like it just comes on? Like, uh,

you could feel it a little bit. And then what happens is is like for me at least my d when it happened. Yeah, I was driving, so like the more you drive, the more to musics on, the more sometimes you feel like you could like drive it away in a weird way. And then were you guys not getting along either? Was it like that kind of like getting out of town like stressful vibe in the car judgment,

but that's how everything is. She was there was definitely that, but it was also like she was very like supportive of me once I said I was anxious and like yeah, and then she ended up driving like two or you know, or maybe three of the four hours and then I drove all day to day but like yeah, which you know, was very nice of her, and like I could have drove after the first leg and she just wanted to

keep driving. But like what did you um, how did it get to the point where you're like, I gotta did you get pull over for gas and then you decide that or was it like I gotta pull over? Like this is freaking me? Like were you verbalizing it?

Was it just I felt way better? You know what happens is my eyes, you can't when you're having a panic attack or anxiety attack, you can't like you know, sometimes you could calm your eyes, if that makes sense, Like like you're on the road and you're just like looking at the road, but it's not like you can heah, you don't just strain. Yeah you're not. But I like this the whole time. Just strain just and you can't

you can't go like this. You can't like you can't feel like, Yeah, I don't know, it's so fucking weird, man, that makes sense. I the I think, yeah, that checks out. Did you know then? What how did you call him down? Like after she was driving? When did it feel like back to normal? And how did you get there? I think, honestly, I think some of it had to do because we ate a late lunch, we ate in the car. I

think once my blood sugar level. I think that also had something to do with it, if I had to guess. I also drink a very large diet coke right what ever? You know it's a caffeine, no food, lack of sleep, stress, I mean, booster shot it HCT. I can't believe you're alive. Yeah, I was talking about on the top of the show. When you're able to say, oh, this is why this is happening, it like makes it go away, Like when you understand that I was talking about the Back Pain book.

When you know that your back pain is caused by mental anguish, it makes it go away just by knowing it. So knowing it's the stress of the parents, it's the road, like all the things, Suddenly it's like, oh, this isn't my fault, this isn't something else. You just it frees you do you do you? Does that resonate with you? Yeah?

For sure? Like yeah, I just like being able to name it a thousand percent and be able to say it out loud, like trusting that Brenna wouldn't judge me for essentially looking like a woods that I couldn't drive anymore, you know what I mean. Like, but a lot of people don't have run us, and that's why I mean, they're sponsor of the show, but I'm serious, Like this holiday season, it's fucking lonely out there and we're not

gonna be around on the podcast. I know a lot of you look towards us for a company better help you can get. You can find a therapist in like less than forty eight hours. They're not paying me to say this, I'm just saying it's a resource. For people who you can get ten percent off if you go like what it was, it you just I think, I don't know if you can get ten percent off but

your first month. But you can find someone in forty hours and it's someone that doesn't that will not judge you, and you can say all of this ship and just getting it out or gern and burn. That's the cheapest way. Kirsten always does that. You journal all these things and then you burn it and no onalcy or you journal it in such a way that it's such scratchy that no one could see in it. And it helps. But um, I'm glad you had someone to talk you through it.

It's better help dot com slash Nikki Glazer. There you go,

give that gift to yourself. It was interesting, seriously, You're talking about the back thing and we're on a flight to Phoenix, and I sat next to his couple and the guy started talking to me and he's saying that his wife, who has had five back surgeries, was going to Phoenix to get like a non FDA approved stem cell transplant, and I was like yeah, I was like, you know, I was like, I wonder how much of it's mental and stuff like just having a conversation and

his wife is sitting next to him. Oh, and I didn't never told you that. She pulls up um her X ray of the plates in her back and she goes tell him it's not mental. And I'll go, oh wait, let me bring up my friend from twelve. It's not I would have said, honey, it's it's not mental. It's metal in your back. But also that metal doesn't have to hurt that bad. You can literally your arm could be chopped off. And if you can have enough equanimity as meditatively that you can handle any kind of pain.

Now that's a different type of thing. Like that's where if you're you have chronic pain, the waking Up app is like so clutch and you can get it for free if you write into sam hairs dot org and say you can't afford it. But they have that meditation called Working with Pain, and in it he talks about, you know, you can meditate through pain. That's why you know those monks who would self emmoly, wh would set themselves on fire and just sit still, they truly were

in a state where they weren't feeling pain. Because you can handle any it doesn't. Just because it's mental doesn't mean that it's not real. No one's saying that you're crazy. Some people might and that sucks, but you don't have to prove your pain to anyone. Your pain is your pain, and by admitting that it's in your head does not mean that we shouldn't feel sorry for you, or help you with your bags, or think you're doing you're not doing it yourself. Who would want to be in pain?

I mean, I guess some people want to be sick so they get attention, but that but that's a sickness is and of itself where I feel sorry for you too, if you if that's how you gotta get love. I mean, I think people just really fear not um. They either fear getting pity or they fear that they're not going to get pity and that they're gonna be blamed for it.

And psychosomatic is such a bad connotation also, Um. I was in therapy the other day and I was talking about emotional incest, where you know, you have a parent who treats you like a spouse in terms of like the things they talked to you about, not really having boundaries, just they treat you like a friend and it's called emotional incest, and she had some other kind of uh they spouse ify you, And I was like, that's a better word than emotional incest. Uh. Sexual incest is ruined.

The word incests incest doesn't have to mean sex with your uncle or brother. But like when someone told me like, oh, you know that sounds like emotional incest, I'm like, no, wait, no, I'm not gonna identify as that. That's horrifying. Um. But just giving the names of things trigger people so much. And psychosomatic, when you say it's psychosomatic, it's in your head. People freak out, but it doesn't me It's not a bad thing, so we just have to talk about it

in a different way. It's funny, like incests triggered you. And then when you say psychosomatic, I think of psychosomatic agency that song from like Prodigy, Prodigy, oh that mac my bit joke. So every time I hear that word,

I just want to go agency. But yeah, the last one, I was cleaning up for the housekeeper Andrew, and I was just putting because I knew that closet was clean, So I was like, oh, I'm gonna put some of my music equipment in there out of the living room, and I'm doing a photo shoot in the living room too for Instagram because I have to, you know, shout out the people that gave me free furniture. Um and uh, I left your door open for a second and then

I closed it right away behind me. But then I couldn't find Luigi, like I was getting ready for you know. It was I was in my room and I thought he was just being stubborn and in the podcast to you, because sometimes he just comes in here to be like I'm mad at you. You didn't walk me enough today or whatever the hell is pouting about. And then I was like, oh my god, did I leave him in

the hall hall? And so I go out there he's nowhere, and I'm I'm like Luigi, and I'm like, he's going something like when he got really sick when I first got him. He got like deathly sick. He got something and he went off to die. Dogs do that, They just slink off to go die. And uh. Which brings me back to the thing that I was going to stay at the top of the show about dogs, like I was watching videos last night of dogs who are abused that learned to love and those are the things

that make me cry. Okay, so I've finished that thought. But anyway, I thought he went off to die. I'm like, oh my god, he's sick and dying. And then I was like, I shut Andrew's room right behind me, like there's no wait, but he slinked in there. When I was putting the equipment in your closet. He got in and he got like curled up in the corner and I went and I go. Luigi was the last spot I could look. I looked everywhere, it's not topic of

an apartment, and he was in. He came trotting out just like he was just in there, and like, so I think he felt sad because I he seemed like because I shut the door, and he's like, she just left me in this dark room alone. So I think it was kind of mad at me. But he also looks kind of cozy and he comes in there way more now. Like talk about like a dog that's abuse that like it takes a while to warm up to you and then gives you the most love possible. You know,

I know this dog. Last night I was watching on the the Dodo account, you know, sometimes on Instagram, they show up on the subread make me Cry. And there was this dog that like, just look. It reminded me so much of Marion and Luigi. And the woman is an expert with abused dogs and she's like, this dog, no human has ever been kind to this dog, and it's you know, generally people hit dogs with open hands

or kick them. So she was doing this thing where she was putting her fist out because she didn't want if the dog bit, it's much easier for them to bite fingers than a fist, so you just put your fist out. Looked like she was like going to punch it, and she was like, I know this looks threatening, but dogs don't associate this. Dogs don't really get punched. They

get slapped or kicked. And so this dog was just like like just shaking and cowering and looked so much like Luigi and Marian and it made me realize, like this woman was like, this dog has been severely abused. And I was like, oh my god, that's what happened to my dogs. For sure, someone some human beat the funk out of it. Just was terrorized them. And to see that shift where they you know after a couple

of days. This dog is like kind of reluctant, you know, when you go to pick up Marian Andrew and she kind of just goes like that. She just kind of plays dead and starts like she's her tail is wagging, but she's also shaking in fear. And sometimes to go she'll start screaming. If you go to pet her, she'll start shrieking, and it's like my dad, last night, I go, she goes to why does she do that when you're just trying to give her love and she's wagging her tail.

She comes up to greet you, and then you go to pick her up, and she starts shrieking at the touch of your fingers on her for And it's because she has an involuntary response of I don't think she cognitively she thinks that she's about to be beat, but her body remembers that this means I'm gonna get hurt, and it just starts shrieking. It alarms us. She's been through a lot. He weighs like, how could you six pounds?

So her tail is bent in a right angle. So it was definitely shut in the show by a dog left in four months ago, like, yeah, she's been through a lot. How could you be mean to that little dog? How could you? For people who abuse animals, they must be so abused themselves. It's just God. We just got to stop the cycle. Get help people, better help dot com slash Nicki Lazer. Let's take a break and we're gonna come back with an all fan tracks the rest

of the episode. Alright, we're back, let's do fan tracks all right, guys, we love hearing from you. We hear from you so often. I get so many messages d M S. I got one last night. I just want to read to like start us off. It was the fucking sweetest thing you guys. You all top each other with sweetness. It gets it's insane. So last night I went live with my dad on Nikki Glazer pod and I went over to his house because I was he

was trimming the tree. My mom was going to see a concert with her friend, and I go, I'll go hang out with my dad. I'll miss times like this when I either move or he's dead or I'm dead. So um, she said, this is from cat Hi. I'm too awkward to leave a voice memo, but I'm a fan from day one of m g P and start each day listening to the pod. I tune into the Instagram lives frequently and play a game with myself to see how many of my comments Nikki slash Andrew will

respond to. So far, I'm four out of four and proud. Tonight's live with Nikki's Dad was so pure. I thought it needed to be recorded because if we find it, because if we find it so special, then I know you will in the future too. That is a fucking bestie. Thanks for being so open and vulnerable with us. It truly does feel like we are bestie's because of how

well we know you. I hope I get to come to see a show soon, but in the meantime, the lives the lives Instagram lives really feel like private performances that we love anyway, don't be Cat and Jackalope. Um, thank you so much, Kat, and the video you sent me of me and my dad truly is like I posted on my Instagram personal story, I will cherish it forever and you were the only one to send me one, and I was secretly hoping someone would, but I thought, you know what, let me just live in the moment

and not have to ask people. So the fact that you captured it means it's like the greatest gift. And someday when he has past, like, I know that I'm going to look back at this video and it's going to be one of the most special things in my life because it really was a special, like Christmas moment where my dad and I were playing guitar and he was so proud of me. Everyone kept saying Ted looks so proud, and I'm like, why do I interpret his pride as he's judging me like I obviously am doing.

It was really sweet, though. All the best he's made me so proud of him because they're just like, he's so cool, he's so talented, he's so hot. Everyone's saying, my dad's a daddy. Um. But truly, thank you so much, Cat for that gift of that video. It meant so much to me. And um yeah, thank you to everyone who was watching last night or who watches any of our lives. Um. All right, so what's next? Okay, I'm gonna start with this voicemail since it's about yesterday's show.

Hey guys, um, I just got done listening to Wednesday's podcast, The st Bernard that solid food, and I think you guys should do like once a week. It's all no news, no, why do I care anything like that, just like self help therapy day or something like that. Oh my god, that was amazing. Um. I literally just got like, had a whole day with my mom yesterday, UM, and had experienced what you guys talked about, like, oh my gosh,

you should do it. You should, yes, if you don't. Um, this episode was still amazing and I'm probably gonna go listen to it over and over again. UM, thank you guys for everything you do. Love you, love you jack Pot. Wait who was that? She didn't leave her name? Anonymous? Oh anonymous, sweet girl, that's driving and I heard your turn signal. Um, yeah, let's do it, like, let's let's devote.

I love that the show has a format and segments you can trust, and but I love that it also can be an accordion of where we can just shorten certain things and not do them and in in you know, in honoring places that we just want to go. And yesterday was fucking good for me. Like, I felt so

good after that. I was able to go over to my parents and like, and I had some triggering moments with my dad where I like snapped at him and he wanted me to play twelve string guitar and I'm like, Dad, I don't even know how to play a six string stop And then he's like, try this song and it's like and I'm like, Dad, can we just play a song that has a G C D F Like let's I just want to have a good time. I don't want to And I was being I was being a bit about it at times. But what did that talk

yesterday got me over there in the first place? And it got me even though it wasn't perfect and I was not a perfect child and and loving of my father. Um, I was able to talk to him about that attached book, which does mean a lot to me. And I talked to him about my feelings and he was able to hear them. And he asked me about the podcast yesterday, which was weird. I was like, it was actually really good. I was like, didn't he hear it? I was like,

it didn't come out yet, Um, but it it. You know what, even if he didn't hear it, something about my approach yesterday, he didn't need to hear all that stuff. I was able to present my feelings in a way that he was able to receive them even though they weren't met perfectly. And I ended the top of the show by saying, fuck you Dad. Um, we're closer now because he knows my feelings. And it was because of yesterday, Andrew, did you feel good after yesterday? I had a full

panic attack. Dr Yeah, that's right. Oh, okay, maybe maybe it triggered that. Honestly it could have no, but that's fine. Therapy does do that sometimes. Yeah. I don't look at that as a negative. I look at it like, oh, maybe I uncoveraged something and got it out and my body was just like, okay, now I'm good tomorrow, you know. Yeah, I went to couples therapy the other day and I have not talked to the person that I'm goin to couples counseling with because of how much it brought up.

And my mom was like, that's not good, and I'm like, no, no, no, that is not a knock against therapy. We are getting to a place that is uncomfortable that we Yeah, we didn't have enough time to finish it up and tied in a bow, but that thing was going to be there all along, and it was gonna find its way out maybe twenty years from now, but thank god it came out now. And sometimes you just need you know, when you do a skin treatment and you like started

accutane or something, your body like purges all this. You explode with acne first and then it goes away like it's going to get messy before it gets good. So um, yeah, we should do trigger warnings. I guess there, like a vaccine, you know. Yeah, it's like the booster. You might feel sick for a couple of days, but in the long run, you're not gonna end up dead. Next one, Next one. Next one is about a controversial topic, but we discussed on the show and some feedback on it. Hi, Nikki,

Andrew and Noah. I'm listening to the episode several monsters, and I had to pause right away and give you a shout. Um regarding floating several minutes and driving several miles, Okay, okay, agree with Niki for floating several minutes. It's definitely less than time. I would say like four or five six. However, so my Andrew, when you say several miles, I would think several miles is like a significant difference. I think it really just depends on the situation. Maybe there's some

other topics we could explore where that might be true. Anyways, I love the podcast. Listen to you every morning on my way to work, and when I picked my eleven months year old done up from daycare, we listened to it on the drive home. And let me tell you, he is cultured. Love you what was her name? She's really she's departing from them. I love that. Listen you guys just gotta get the j a part right for

all I care. Um, I didn't have to leave a name, by the way, Okay, Well, mother of a new eleven month old, congratulations, Um, you sound great, and you know it's okay to be wrong. Um about the several miles, but you know you're right. It's note. I think we looked it up in the dictionary and it is more than a few less than a lot, so I guess

you know it is up to interpretation. Um. The other day I was driving with Carlyle and just like Noah, Carlile as someone who does not know distances like you can't doesn't know what miles are or like fractions of miles, which is mind boggling to me. But guess what, I'm I don't know things that they know, you know, that are like truly just can't grasp simple things that they go, how could you not get that? And um, you're one of those people when it comes to several you know,

like there's certain things. Um no with she God, we were it said it said point eight miles ahead and she started breaking and going Nikki, you know, she just goes, you know, I'm bad at with us, and instead of me going, how could you not? Like I wanted to do that so bad, but I just go, you know what, who the funk cares? She doesn't know this. I used to get so mad at my friend Huffy and say something real quick. If you my mom's calling. One second,

hold on my mom's calling. We gotta get this. Hi mom, Hi, you're not on a podcast right now? You are? Oh my god, I am. Yeah. Hey, I'm so excited about about we are going to get a vegan Christmas dinner. Okay, yes, thank you? Oh because I brought all that ground meat over look around me, go look in the freezer, bitch. So for meatless farms. They're the ones that I did the ad campaign for and they get me a ton of um ground vegan meat. Yeah, go check the freezer.

I gotta go back to the podcast. I thought you might say something funny, and you did. You're always funny. We're vegan. I'm so excited about all this, Mom, I gotta say, the post you posted on Instagram last night is the worst picture I've ever seen. Have you seen it? It's so blurry. I know you definitely had some a little couple of drinks when you posted it, but it is. It looks like the last photo shot of a woman who died later that night. No, no, no, don't take

it down. It's cute. No, your captain is cute. I love that you post when you drank. That's something that you know everyone relates to. Yes they do, Mom, People people post when they drink. Believe me. Um, it's a picture of your friend Elaine. What does it say, Andrew does my friend Elaine? Sean Kanan Voodoo says my friend Eline, Shawn Cannon Voodoo. We is some lucky girls. We is some lucky girls. I love that you gave it a little Um, we is some lucky girls. Did you have

fun last night? Yeah? I know you missed a concert Dad and I had. Everyone was asking where you were on the Instagram live all the best He's wanted to know I heard last night. I'm so glad. Yeah, but the besties were wondering where where's Julie. So I'm glad we got to hear from you today. We are going to get back to fan t Rex. Gotta go Merry Christmas, love you alright, Sorry about that. Let's get back to uh, several more fan t Rex. What did Andrew have to

say though? Oh? Yeah, so if you if you said to Carlile, point, we're point eight miles away, right, and then you go, oh, we're several tens of a mile away, would you use it there? I think that was five to seven tense. I just don't even think you'd use a word there. No, you wouldn't. Who says tense of a several tents? Yeah, it's a bad example. Um, let's get back to Vantrax. Okay, we do look so sad. Here's here's a Story's great. By the way, we have so many I just want to say thanks to all

the besties. I'm just blown away. Okay, yeah, noah, here's all of them. So yeah, no any any anything to say to them besides thank you. Just based on what you hear, I'm well, I'm really impressed with how on point all the messages are. And you know, everyone just gets through them and tells their story concisely or has a question or message. And I don't think if I ever called into like a talk show, I would be that collected. So thank I think about that all the time.

I really do. And I'm I speak for a living. I truly when I leave messages, they are so rambly and terrible. I'm always so impressed. And by the way, you're allowed to read leave a rambly terrible yeah, but fine, we will it is. It is very impressive. Whenever people call radio stations, I'm always like, how is this caller so cool and composed? Like I would be so nervous, so um And it's okay if you are, and and

if your message sucks, we still love you. But thanks for nailing it most of the time, according to Noah, and from what I hear, they're all great. So let's let's not okay. Here's here's a fun little story. Hi know, Drew Gi I had to let Nikki know that I quoted her in the bedroom last night, UM, I partook in some as play, but with my boyfriend, UM being the receiver. M. I have never done this before, so I, uh, you know, licked a little bit down there and use

some toys down there. Looked up and I quoted Nikki and said, you know, like Nikki Glazer because he's like, wow, you're used a lot. And I was like, you know, like Nicky Glazer says all the lube in the list, and it just made me happy to reference you in the bedroom. But I don't know anyways. UM, that's all I have to say. But I love that so much. You really make my days so much brighter. And uh, I hope you all have a wonderful holiday. I love you.

Thank you so much. UM, thanks for sharing that normalizing it. You didn't even go into detail about what happened or how he received it, like it doesn't matter, like we need to talk about anal stuff as the same way we talked about any other stuff. So I love that. It wasn't like I did this thing and it was this like, yeah, you let your boyfriend's asshole and fucking that's the end of the story. And it's great and

good in a relationship. And y, and congrats to your boyfriend for being man enough to know that like that doesn't make him anything but a guy who is open to different kinds of pleasure that might be awaiting him through his asshole. And um and I love that you reference me in but I always, you know, even in my stand up BacT I say, you know, I know this is a weird thing. Just say this comedian I watched told me to do it. Blame it on me, and you can be like this podcast I listened to

suggested it. I thought it sounded weird. This is her fault. If it's weird, bring me up, please, you know, bring me in like a third party. I'll be your little you know, fantasy unicorn. Um, I love I'm you know I love sex, So bring me in your bedroom. I'd love it. Thank you for that. That's a cool call. Okay, speaking of which, I think we may have landed on the biggest cust story of the year. Oh my god. Okay, so tell me what you think. I think it's from MICHAELA, Nicki, Noah,

and Andrew. I'm calling in to Sherrick from today. So I was at a tattoo shop getting um a tattoo touched up and I was with an artist, like I know whatever, hanging out in the shop, and this other artist walks by and he has a tattoo on his forearm of a QR code, and so I'm like, oh my god, like does that actually go to something whatever? And the tattoo artist without knowing it, because like he's not a bustie, he's not been on the joke, and he's like, oh, he's so kill it's to feed his ego.

And so turns out that the QR code is to this man's Instagram, so that I guess he can like roll up his sleeve and you can follow his Instagram account. So definitely very c and my um made me think of you. I thought it was really funny, and so I just wanted to share with all the besties. Um, Jack Colonio, We're going to count that. But I don't even know what she said. That was awesome, Um, you know what. I almost wanted to deposit to guess what

it would go to. I was like thinking a a menu at a Thaie restaurant because that's only cure coats. But that is so stupid, And I mean tattoos tattoo shops are a bastion of I can that's so cool though in a way that actually is cool. I kind of think it's cool too. I don't want to be a dick either. I think it's kind of cool. What I don't what I I think that anyone. I think within that Instagram account you would find a lot of activity though, like like post like Andrew you did yesterday,

you nailed nailed it that that that. Go look at Andrew's Instagram and look at the picture he took next to his Corolla of It's It's not the caption definitely, uh, let you know what the joke is. But the picture itself is so spot on, with this casual looking at the ground like I'm kind of hot but I'm not trying to be. But I am like you are? You were? You deserve an oscar for that? Um did you see

I tagged Garrett and Casey from f Boy comment. If you go to Giohnny Polo, the guy from the start the Power Show I told you about, you might have talked him a couple of times. He does it everything I I scream in his comments. Look at the fucking camera, look at it. It's so lame to be like, oh, just looking at the ground like it's so good, and um, what was your captain? You were like that Corolla life. Oh you said I'm sleep or even as I live.

It's so funny. By the way, you should get their Starbucks. That my Starbucks order on my arm would be pretty cool. But I just don't believe that QR codes are gonna stick around. There's gonna be something else soon. We lost you again. That's for the best. We'll wait for him to get back on um what I wanted to say

real quick while we wait for Andrew to return. There's a podcast called dead Eyes that is about a guy that got fired from UH Tom Hanks's Band of Brothers UH mini series back you know in the early thoughts, and he got fired because Tom Hanks said he had dead eyes and it was just a one line role and he said, you know that guy's dead eyes. And the casting director told the guy he's firing you because you have dead eyes, which Tom Hanks did not intend

for this guy to find out about. So this guy does a whole podcast investigation about what that means and why he got fired, and like, and he did the whole podcast hears. It's awesome. It's so well done. And I was talking about it on a podcast called The Daily Zeitgeist, which is a great daily podcast if you haven't checked it out, um, and they heard me talk about the show and the guy Connor Ratcliffe, who is the actor from Dead Eyes. He he writes me on my d M s and it's like, hey, will you

be on my podcast? And I was like sure, I didn't even ask any questions. I get to it and he confronts me with the clip of me talking about him saying he actually does have dead eyes. I looked and there's a podcast today, so listen to the least recent episode of Dead Eyes and it kind of takes you through everything. You can kind of just jump ahead to mind but then go back and listen to the others,

but if you want to hear it. He confronts me about saying he had dead eyes and then we investigate like what that means, and he said that I was the only one that was going to be honest with him because he just plays John Hamm like all these different comedians that he goes through that are like you don't have you have the kindest eyes. Connor, that is not true, and I'm like, yeah, they're kind of scary and lifeless and it's so funny. But um, yes, dead eyes.

Oh wait is it rat Liff? Yeah, Connor rat Liff, Yeah they're dead Yeah right, okay, it's really I was listening to it and laughing because it's so funny. He confronts me and I'm like, I didn't know that you would ever hear that. I'm busted. He's like, no, you're allowed to say that. Like, let's let's talk about it. So anyway, Um, let's get back to father Rex. I wonder if that proves that Tom Hanks is actually not a nice person. Let's go to a story from Anna. Okay, Anna, Hi, Nikki,

Andrew and Noah, this is Anna. I just listened to the episode where Nikki correctly pronounced catalytic converter um, and it brought me back to the time earlier this year. Um, when my friend took me to the wine Country. Um, we came back and my car was parked at her apartment and over the weekend, Uh, somebody crawled under my car and cut out my catalytic converter um. So when

I turned my car on, it made this horrible roaring sound. UM, and I thought it was drivable, so I tried to uh drive down the street and apparently they also chopped some other things out all the while. UM, I am just thinking the entire time that other people think I am so good my car is making this knock falling down the street. UM. I ended up being so embarrassed that I called Triple A and they came out and uh helped me tow my car so I didn't have

to live with the embarrassment of making such a Clouds sucks. UM. Just thought I would share I Love your Guys podcast. UM, so thanks, thank you. I love that she hit on two things there, Cadilla converter and Cadilla concoca. Um. Yeah, unintentionally could like when you you think your EarPods are connected and you're blaring your music, you're accidentally ki Like just those moments where you're like, no, no, no, I did not intend to be kid here, and I'm so

sorry I was. UM. I'm just gonna read a quick note that I got um from someone on the road. This is from Aaron Moffatt. She got me a Taylor Swift card that says Sagittarius it's like a birthday card for a sagittarius. But she said, I know it's not your birthday, but this is the only tailor Swift card that I could find in all of Calgary. I just wanted to say that as an absolute bustie, I truly appreciate how open you are with your fans slash busties.

You inspire me to be a better vegan, be more mindful, and remind me to always be truthful. Your comedy has allowed me to not be ashamed of my hastily packed vagina, and rather I can laugh at it and laugh at other quirky sexual things that happened. Finally, thank you for putting out so much of yourself, uh recently, oh, of yourself. I recently moved to Calgary and I've never felt alone thanks to you, Noah and Andrew. I can't wait to see your new special and tell all my friends about it.

X O x O. Always a bestie, always a swifty Aaron Moffatt, Thank you so much, Aaron. And if you live in Calgary and are a bestie and you want a bestie friend, which anyone who listens to the show, you're gonna get along with other people contact Aaron Moffatt E R I N M O F F A T T thirteen, Aaron Moffatt thirteen and UM get together and talk about the show over coffee. Become friends. UM one more. This was a really funny card that I got. It's

a guy uh with walking and on a leash. He has a gigantic rooster on a leash, and it says he was going to be a lot more specific with his wishes next time because he asked for a big cock. You know, Nikki, I wanted to let you know how much your guests help me in the early days of the pandemic. While things are better, I still have some struggles, but listening to your banter with Andrew and Noah's soothing interjections is a bomb to my soul. Keep doing what

you do, making people laugh. Merry Christmas, your bestie forever, Cassandra. No pressure, but I can't wait for your book. So nice. Thank you guys so much those they I met those two shows. And then I want to shout out to Rachel. Um. I believe it was Rachel. Is this the card she gave me? Um? Maybe it's Brianna. I forget who gave me it was either Nicole or Brianna who in Calgary gave me a necklace. No, I think I don't think Rachel was one of the names. NICKI. I love you

so so much. You helped me cope with so much. I listened to your podcast every day. Call or text me Brie. She left her number. Um, and one of these people gave me a necklace that they have. They have one, and I have one, and I want to put it on now officially and let you know that I will be wearing this around my neck until it falls off because I don't take off necklaces. So I love it. Thank you so much. You guys never have

to you know. I love what is on there. It's a little um it's like a little diamond, just a perfectly simple diamond. I fucking love it. It's so cute. I feel so stylish, and I love that someone else is wearing the other one. That's one of my besties. Al right, Next fran Tax Okay, next one is from Leo. Mhm, Hey, Nikki. Um. I was just thinking about your podcast and how much I love it, and I was kind of like why, and uh, I was thinking that you don't really talk

about politics that much. And um, I think you mentioned at some point that you don't claim to know that much about politics. It's not exactly like your forte or anything. And uh, if or when people tell you that you should know more about politics, I say no, like, thank you so much for what you've done. Um, if it's I have an escape from the can instant barrage of like political information, and this is an escape and it's amazing, and keep doing what you're doing. Don't look into it,

don't let it be part of your podcast. Oh my god, I appreciate it's so much. It really helps me anyway. I hope everybody's having a good day. Thank you. Wait, what's his name? Leo? Leo? Fucking thank you. That is what I needed to hear, not just about my you know, insecurities about not knowing about politics, but like anything you know, like just stop worrying about what you don't like or what you're not good at, like, just focus on what you are good at and what you want to be

good at. And if I wanted to be good at politics, I would figure it out, you know. Um. Thank you, Leo. And your voice sounds like Dan Savage. Um, and Dan Savage is one of my favorite voices, and it just sounds so I just feel like Dan Savage. Listen to

my podcast, and I just got so fucking fluttered. And you sound so smart too, like Dan Savages so um, and you're obviously someone who knows a lot about politics and probably reads a lot about it, and so I'm just like appreciative that someone like I'm already putting you out of pedestal because you do know about politics, and which means I'm not on that pedestal with you. But you told me not to do that, so thankfully, Nikki.

You know, I just love how like your podcast dum you are, how dumb and stupid like you guys are, and like how you can't think of anything smart but don't try. Don't know. No, he doesn't make you smart. I know I did not take it that way, and we know you. Yeah, but there was that's wrong, that's funny. No, he's not wrong, And I guess what it's it's good to be to keep it simple, because honestly, I have no control over politics, and when I do read about them,

I feel so angry. And I think a lot of people constantly consume news and they they feel like they can do something about it. And unless you know, you can vote and volunteer and you know, make calls and stuff like that, but you aren't going to do that stuff. Stop if you know in your heart like that's not where your energy is gonna go. Stop reading the news.

You can't control it. So just fucking just there is something about like when you see like an insane like political person like online, it it's like somehow negates it

and it's like normal. But if you see like a crazy political person in person, they have three newspapers and old stained like coffee cups that they got through Starbucks three days ago, but they're using it and getting refills, and they have crazy hair, and they always like have newspapers under their arm and they're walking like this, and they have like a too many layers of clothes on, and they just seem angry and bedraggled, and they're talking

about like the Wig Party. I don't know about that, but um, did you see LOUI You you watch Louis News Special? Right? I did. I watched it and I thought, you know, I laughed a lot, but I wasn't like, Wow, this is going to change my perception about things. But dude, I've already been referencing things he laid out in there, like it's already changing the way I think about things, Like when my dog, I'm like, my dog like just

hears and atensive that, Like that was so funny. And then also last night my friend Saralene, his grandma died and she told our group chat about it, and I was like saying, like, I'm so sorry she died. And then I was like, actually, like death, Thank God for death, Like we have to realize, like people can't live forever. And Louis makes a point, He's like, can you imagine if people never died? Like we have people from the eleven hundreds being like, how do you work this QR code?

Like we we can't even dolerate people in their sixties. Were like, just hap it, mom, like just scan it,

Like we get so frustrated. Can you imagine we're like dealing with ponscious pilot and like, uh, you know the settlers of fucking Roanoke and we're like, just dad, the you just zoom in with your thong, Like it's just so funny to think about old people, Like that's the way to look at that he made a way for me to look at death and help my friend laugh about the fact that like, yeah, it's inevitable and it's

just something you have to accept. And the opposite, if there were no death, that's not a world I want to live in either. And I just thought that was kind of powerful. Final thought. Yeah, I thought his elephant, like, we're giving an elephant an m r I, Like we're doing that to them, like they just they just they just But we also give them the cancer that they get by feeding them food and didn't putting them in captivity and causing them stress. So I think we owe

it to them too. I had an argument against that, and I thought that whole thing about like, you know, if you're six hundred pounds, you have to go to the zoo to get an m r I because they don't have them at the hospitals. And yet we we we've you know, fall over ourselves to make bathrooms for trans people, but yet you know, fat people were just like, go to the fucking zoo to get an m r I. But the thing is, a bathroom takes no money to like just say hey, this is all genders. We it's nothing.

Whereas building an m R I to fit someone that's six underground is expensive. And that's that's why it's not because we And that doesn't mean we shouldn't do it. But I hate when people make points and then they throw trans people under the bus to prove their point, like like even Chappelle, it's like, just we could still need to work on racism without saying that trans don't deserve things. Trans people don't deserve things, and that's we

can both can be true. You can still want to make transfer people feel good and acknowledge their persecution and and also say we haven't fixed the race issue both. It doesn't have to be either. Or when you throw trans people under the bus to prove your point, I'm not really a out of that, and I think it doesn't invalidate your point. It just doesn't for me help anything.

And it's making punching someone so that you can build someone else up does It's the it's argument we said the other day about when you get confronted and you go, will you do this? It's like, but that doesn't it doesn't have to factor in. It can just stand alone that you're that you did this thing that upsets someone. You don't have to it because it doesn't. You can acknowledge on on a separate issue, but it doesn't have to be brought into that argument to validate something more.

And the fucking trans thing, you know, Leo knows I don't get political, but that just be nice to them if it doesn't. How often do you have to go through your day and encounter trans people and and figure out what's pronoun to use? And it's it's so much?

How often does that happen to you? Oh? Maybe you know the barista is trans where at the place you work, and you get a little bit gared that you might blurt out thanks, dude, like, oh that's is that the inconvenience because you get a little bit nervous about using the wrong pronom deal with it. They have to educate everyone about their pronom They have to live in a they have to be born in a body they don't

feel comfortable in. I know you don't understand that because you were lucky enough to be born in the body that uh presents the way you feel inside, but they weren't. So fucking shut up and just take your coffee and stop bitching about it. And yeah, I have a right to bitch about you because you're the problem, not trans people. Final statement just gets so fucking mad. I like the banana bit too. That was so good. I mean, there were so many the analogy with his pants at his

ankles taken all the way down. Yeah, you guys gotta I mean any regardless of how you feel about louis like the bits again, let's take the all that stuff out of it. No matter what he is, you can't help say that that's funny. Like, guess what now, I'm not comparing him to Michael Jackson, but I'm still gonna dance to Thriller. Even though I believe in my heart of hearts that Michael Jackson penetrated little boys and sucked them up for lives for the lift, I still think

Thriller is good. I had this thought the other day in the shower about Morgan Wallen, right, who said the N word, and to think like extremely he said it to his white friends. Right, he said to his friends when he say good night when he was dropped. Yes,

there's context there, but you should never say whatever. My point is is that liberals thought you were going to cancel a white country artist with a Mullet for saying the N word, right, which is crazy to think that that would That's why people said about the N word tapes about Trump if they come out that he said the N word him more, what are you kidding me? And then the people, the extreme people that love Morgan Wallen more because because start trying to get you cut

out again, you're cut out. We can't hear you. We can't hear you. We can't hear you. What if I just canceled him because he's going off about Moana. We gotta finish out the show anyway. So this is a great place to end with Andrew being sorry Andrew, we gotta go, guys, I'm sorry, Um, and no one's got to get to therapy, right no, uh yeah, have my therapy today. Yeah. Um, I'm so jealous. I would love to go. Yeah you will, Okay, what finish your thought

and then we gotta go. My point is you don't have to buy twenty more albums to prove your fanship for Morgan. You can still listen to Whiskey Glasses every once in a while, but you don't need to get a tattooed on your asshole, right, like you don't need to go the other way. Like, but to me, Um, if I care enough about trans rights, I can do that can be part of my identity. And if if Morgan supporting Morgan Wallen is you're But that's the thing.

It's like when Dave Chappelle said, Hey, you don't need to name this theater after me if more people who don't want it donate more money than me. Um, that that's I don't know what what do you feel about that? Do you feel like he's do you feel that way about that where he's asking like, Okay, people don'tate money if you like me pretty much? Um, I mean, I guess it's to a cause and not just his bank account, so maybe the greater good is better in that circumstance. Yes,

all right, Well this has been a great episode. We're taking next week off. Stay tuned to Nikki Glazer Pod for Lives. We'll go live. Put the little alert on so you find out if we are going live. Andrew, Um, I hope to see you on there at some point. Have so much fun in Michigan. Oh yeah, thank you? And you have fun being a fruit roll up today and it was fun um living with you. We didn't we we don't live together anymore. Wait what I guess. Yeah, because I'm leaving the seven and you're out by the

time I get back. Well that's a bombshell. Um, the I get back on here, yeah, maybe the second, as early as the second, as late as you know, I'll be moving my stuff. But yeah, I won't be staying another night while you're staying another night. Yeah, moving doesn't count as like living there when you're just like moving. Yeah, you can still come by. You're going to change the locks. It was a hell of a year, so fun this came of it. So happy new Year to everyone. Um,

I love you so much. I can't believe a year ago you guys weren't in my lives in the way that you are. And it's just I'm so grateful for every one of you, and Noah and Andrew. Thank you so much. Um. Yeah, we've learned a lot this year. We've been through a lot. Um. I hope you all have a great holiday and that you stay grounded and you be nice to yourselves and you indulge in the things that feel good and don't beat yourself up about indulging. Just be good to yourself. That's my wish for you.

Um yeah, have fun, don't beat yourself up. Indulge like celebrate working hard all year or maybe not working hard, being a lazy piece of ship. And celebrate like, hey, I was lazy this year because I needed to be celebrate whatever it is at the end of the year. It's the only time we really get to indulged in that. So make sure you feel it. Do it. I'm demanding

that you do it. And if someone goes what or two working today, well, I was told by Nikki that I had to do something nice for myself, which is laying bat all day on, going TikTok. Do it. Whatever makes you feel good, It's the time to do it. Andrew any final words, final word? All right, thanks guys, Noah, love you. Happy holidays, um, happy New Year, and we'll see you in the new year. Guys, uh, don't be care and do