#110 Pizza In The Dark

I can't join in. There's been too much, and it's just like, get in here. We got a party going on. It doesn't matter that you missed most of it, will catch you up. Come over here, do a you know what's it called? Like a I'm just picturing showing up at a party and being like, we'll get you wasted. You'll catch up with us, and then you pour um some kind of alcohol down an ice luge? Did you ever do those those shot luges at front parties? Like I've just did a funnel? Is that what it is? Um? No?

But we well it's just a it's like you it's I forget what they call ice luge, but that's like, no, it's there's some kind of yeager luge. I don't know you. There's a big block of ice and they carve out little like runs and then they pour shots down it and then you put your mouth at the end of it and you just um end up getting date rapes later on. Um, I think that's how it ends. I mean, so, um, yeah, it's Tuesday. I'm wearing a shirt that's this plant based

on it. And let me just tell you, already got a compliment on it this morning. I never have anyone go I like your shirt. No one ever says that. A very kind woman at Starbucks just goes like your shirt, and I'm like, yeah, another vegan bitch out there. Um felt good. That's why I where the stuff is, just to like find like minded people. And the shirt's reversible. I don't even think it's not. Noah, flip it around and I'm gonna wear the shirt tomorrow maybe and it's

gonna say something else on the other side. I got it by from beat by beat b e et x b E t um. Yeah. I mean I researched cool like vegan shirts and I found some, so thank god. Um yesterday was really fun. I recorded a song It's in the It's in the bag. Um, it's so good, so excited onion. Matt Um we went to a studio

here in St. Louis, Sawhorse studios, like actual recording studio. UM, and it's like, I don't know, man, it just made me feel close to uh, my my girl t Swift, because I was like, this is the exact process she goes through. Like there was nothing that wasn't the same as every mote like, um, it was just a place where you can make a dough bass album. I mean, Taylor Swift did folklore, recorded folklore in her bedroom, so like you can do one kind of anywhere. Billie Eilish

famously did her first album or her debut. I guess the one that she wanted Grammy for that was in her bedroom. Um, but it was just done with a great sound engineer, Jason Um. On you and Matt. Matt wrote the song, and the song he wrote was based off of like he had heard about my life and like my um romantic issues via his girlfriend Anya and I had kind of like talked openly about it in front of him too, but not as much because I just try not to like burden that many people with

that stuff. Um, but he's been around me because he's my tour manager and he watches all my shows on stage. And although I don't talk about like the thing that I kind of this song was written about that much on stage. Um, he was able to craft the song. And this it's weird because he wrote the song not he didn't tell me he was going to write it. He didn't tell Anya he was writing it about me or from my perspective. He just wrote the song. He

played it for Anya. This is like a couple of months ago, and Anya texted me and was like, oh my god, Nikki, I don't know what's going on. Match just wrote this song. And I've never heard her say this, and it's not because Matt's not a brilliant musician, but because he is Matt pond p A. She was like, Matt just wrote the song and I'm like crying. It's so good. It's just so beautiful. And I was like, oh my god, that's awesome. I want to hear it

sometime and she goes, holy shit. And I was as we're like talking, you know, texting, She's like, he just told me it's from he wrote it for you, and I'm like, it was set up where you set up to go, like, I just heard this song and I love it. Oh, by the way, I just found out

it's about you. Like Anna is not a liar, so like it really happened in that kind of Um, that's why I think she like she loved it so much was because it just um reminded her of probably me and and we have similar kind of attitudes towards love and stuff like that. So I think it I think that a lot of people are going to relate to it. And um, it's it's just he's such quiet. Matt is such a quiet, like introspective soul, and like doesn't really weigh in when I'm like lamenting about guys or whatever

it is. He's just like quietly drives the van to the venue or what. You know. We're just but I'm always like chit chatting about stuff around him. And he just absorbed my feelings and put them into a song. And I heard the song and I start crying when she sent it because I was like, oh my god, like this is how I feel. And then I played it for Andrew. This is a couple of months ago. I played it for Andrew. It was just this raw sounding like just like kind of sloppy like death cabs

like guitar and then like his voice over it. I played it for Andrew. I instantly figured out the chords and was like, I have to learn this song. I want to play this like I have to sing this. Then Andrew was like, Jesus Christ, that sounds so good, and so we started like listening to it all the time. And then Matt was like, why don't we record this song? Why don't you record this song? I would love for you to do that. We'll do it when I'm you know,

on the road somewhere. We'll get a studio. And it just worked out that I'm doing this thing with a bunch of cameras following me around, and I was like, oh, that'd be fun to actually have them document for who knows what. Really, we don't know what they're following me around. It's really undetermined at this point. They just started and I don't know even know what it's about. But we decided to like un out a studio and like and

do it. And I think we would have done it even if there weren't cameras following me around like it was just something I've wanted to do. You know, I'm a little bit like, oh, I didn't write it, and I really wanted to write a song, but I got to sing on it. My singing is fine. I have a long ways to go. It's a perfect first attempt. Like the way it sounds. I was like, you know what, in two months, I'm gonna be like, oh, I could do such a better job because I'm going to singing

lessons like twice a week now. I'm going to one right after this podcast, and I'm learning so many little tricks and things about my voice that will make it better. But I sounded pretty damn good, like I sounded all right. And then when you layer things like you don't realize, like so many singers, they just you hear their voice like ten times over itsself and reverb. We realize when you turn up reverb on your voice, it's like mascara. It like makes your voice hotter. It's like a spray

tan for your voice. And so I put a lot of mascara and spray tan on my voice, but not really like it wasn't that it And usually I hate hearing my voice and that first it was kind of hard to hear the playback, and then I was like, oh, this actually sounds good. And then I started like before a lyric or before when we go back to a piece, and Anya was like coaching me through it all and being like, so maybe like don't take a sharp breath

beforehand you're kind of adding um like that. We were actually doing a cover of Cruel Summer that we started on after we finished this song, so this song is called Endless Summer, and then we were also we're also going to do a cover of Cruel Summer, which is Taylor Swift song that Anya already has a cover of

on Spotify. And there's like the first line is like fever dream High and the Quiet of the Night you know that I got it or something like that, and I was saying fever dream High and the Quiet of the Night, you know that I was doing Like she was like take out that just say you know that I got it, And it was so hard to do, Like there's little tricks like that that I just couldn't and then I was just like I can't do this song yet, like this is too much. The breathings all

messed up. Um singings fucking hard. It's playing an instrument. It's hard. So I was able to put my ego on the side and realized that it wasn't gonna sound perfect perfect. I'm not as good as Matt or Anya, not as good as any of the people that I love their voices, even if they have like a weird voice, like even you know, Bob Dylan, Like these people have been doing it so long. I just started lower the

bar and have some fun. And I did, and it's so good and we're gonna shoot a music video for it, and I can't wait to share it with the busties and put it on Spotify and have everyone download it because then I'm going to um hopefully like play it and like have people sing along and stuff. It'll be awesome. Noah,

what book do you did? You just get out? Okay, So I was reading while I was waiting for us to set up this morning, and what you just said is something that I underlined in the book, which is about um learning, like being a good mentor and a good student. So um, all right, so I just want to read. It's called mentoring the Tao of Giving and Receiving wisdom. Oh, what made you pick up this book? Um?

I really liked the Book of dou and I just want to I never learned how to learn or how to teach or receive information, so I thought this would be a good way applying something that I like. I'm loving the sound of everything you're just saying, but especially the sound of this book opening. Will you give me that again? Yes? Oh that's a sm R all over it? Is that a library book? Uh? No, it's a I found in like a bookstore. Does it have like a plastic covering on it? Yeahs Oh god, that's the best.

You know, that plastic covering they put on library books that goes like crinkle like that is that's my jam a sm R. Okay, I am on board. Tell me what uh bestow to me what you learned about learning and about to teach me what you learned about teaching. Okay, I'll read it a little bit longer since you're so interested. Um, okay, okay. It asked us to admit that we don't know, which creates a sense of wisdom that never relinquishes itself to

fix limited opinions about what should be. By acknowledging this emptiness, we which is you know, like acknowledging that we don't know. We enter into a communion with our partners, creating potential relationships of deep understanding and openness to vast growth and change. And then there's like a little um line over here that I highlighted. Those who know they know not become wise, those who presume they know much stay ignorant. I mean

that's it, man, I mean that's like, that's everything. That's every time you enter an argument with someone where you know you're right, that's you're not. It reminds me of an an your lyric it's hard to be wrong, worse to be right, stuck in the middle of Like I was listening to that song the other day and I was like, it is it sucks to be right when you go I know I'm right, you know, And I always say that about being vegan, like we were right.

It's that's not a good place to be in because you're you're stuck and you you're not open to any You have to be open to even wrong opinions. Those make you richer and make you smarter and maybe even you know, help you grow your own Maybe you don't even change your point of view you learn new ways to prove your point of view because you hear more wrong or whatever, Like you have to be open to everything. And I don't know, people always say, like, that's an answer.

You don't have to always say yes and no two things. And this almost comes back to when people want you to ask you to go to a thing and you agree to do something that you don't want to do, or maybe in the moment you want to do it, and then you get to it and you go, oh god, I don't want to do that, and then you make up being sick or something, and then you lie and

it just turns into a whole thing. I don't know is an answer, And you could say that and I there's so much freedom and I don't know, you know, like that that buys you a lot when I go off on these you know, rants on stage about relationships and monogamy and how it's not natural and you know, orgasms ruined relationships and blah blah blah blah blah, and I always, you know, I always say, I've only read a third of these books. I am not that's smart. Um. And I also like, I what did I do yesterday?

That everyone was like that's so embarrassing that you thought, oh, the yard thing, like I thought a yard, a yard was metric was the metric system? Listen, you should be taking any kind of scientific advice from someone who thought a yard was in the metrics like that. That right there shows you. I'm I'm right about the fact that I don't know she diddlie squat, but I do. I

love that I got to read that book. I'm reading Zen Guitar, which I don't know if the Dow and Zen are like connected, but I might be someone who's like my friend Robin Tran has a joke about her girlfriends parents are like, Robin Tran is uh transgendered. Uh, she's a woman, really funny comedian. Uh. You can go to I think it's Robin Tran on on Instagram. She posts stuff all the time. But she did this joke about her girlfriend's family, and I think she's Vietnamese. I

could be wrong about that. I don't know, and I admit ignorance about what what um but she you know, Robin Tran is um Asian, but her and it would be the same as if my parents. She she's definitely not Japanese and her girlfriend's parents brought her to a sushi restaurant to be like, is this what you like? And she's just like, sure, you know what? Close enough

that is? Wait, I forget what my point was about that, but oh, Zen and Zen and now like that could be like sushi and Vietnamese And I'm like, it's the same, right is it the same? Is it in the same gene. I don't think it's the same. I think it's a little bit. Okay, yeah it might be completely different, but um, I'm again I don't know. But anyway, I'm reading the Zen guitar thing, and it's just about like you know, when you pick up your guitar, like like there's no tech.

The teacher in this book is just like this isn't gonna be like a technical approach. We're not gonna learn scales. You're just gonna learn about how you have a song in your soul and this is like you need to bring it out and it's all about spirituality. And that's how I want to approach playing guitar. Like for like, when you pick up your guitar, you pick up that guitar, you don't just you think about it when you pick it up, you think about this. No matter what you're playing.

If it's like a you know, a box with like a little chord on it and you're just drumming that that is your instrument. Think of it like, no matter how shitty your instrument is, that think of it like, this is my tool to communicate. Um. And I like that. I got a new guitar teacher and she's very technical and but also she was just like, yeah, you can play, but I want to know, like what's a trick to playing a bar chord so my finger doesn't hurt and my holding the pick the right way? She's like, I

don't care, like hold it however you want. I'm just gonna teach you about like music theory. So I actually I think she's onto something. Um And I've never had a female guitar teacher, and that is a breath. I've had like five guitar teachers in my life, all men, which great, But there's something about like this, Uh what older woman who just like loves guitar loves tea chang And she came over to my apartment the other day and we had a good old time. Mean Carol, you

know when you get assigned a teacher named Carol. You know, you know what, a young lady ain't showing up. We need to bring back Carol, right, Carol is a good name. I like, there should be like it. I hope my sister when she has her baby names at Carol, it's like a Christmas Carol. Like, yeah, it's a cute little it's a cute name for a baby. I love babies with old people's names. All right, let's bring in Andrew. Let's get him on this conversation. Alrighty, hey, Andrew, So

I was just how did you sleep? By the way, I slept pretty good. I did wake up in the middle of nine and crash some pizza. Yeah, pizza in the dark, baby, And that should be the name of my what album folk? It's in the dark? I mean that is that would be a hit. And that's like not a joke, Like that's a fucking hit. Pizza in the dark with you on a Friday. Now, I'm living life. I'm doing it my way. I'm eating this pizza in the dark. You used to be here. There's more from me,

but is not clear. Springsteen is dancing in the dark. Yeah, but pizza in the dark. I just picture a guy like who used to like eat pizza with his girlfriend. It was like a fun thing they did where they like make pizza late at night, and now it's like this depressing thing, like she's not there and he gets more pizza and he always gave I always gave you that extra slice that I wanted for myself. Now I get to eat it and I feel bad about myself. Yes, yes, yea,

um yeah, pizza in the dark, let's put it. It was Yeah, it was dope. It was. It was a fun experience. And you know you do that and then you wake up in the morning and you go to that Did I eat five in my sleep? Yeah? We had. We went to dinner last night and you just brought some homes some pizza and then you yeah, I'm impressed you didn't finish it before you went to bed. Usually when I bring them leftovers, Let's be honest, I'm they're gonna get eaten right away, or I'm going to leave

him at the restaurant, So I just don't. I just clean a plate. Man. You know, we have cameras following us around for some reason. Well, last night when they were filming us eating, I was a little bit like because I eat. I got a pizza and then I just eat the toppings because I get it with no cheese, and I just like veggies and sauce, Like give me a plate of veggians and sauce, and I know that's probably like wasting the crust, but sometimes crust is delicious.

This one wasn't that good, so I took I looked at the crust. It wasn't And they originally put cheese on my pizza because I forgot to say no cheese, like an idiot. And so they made it and we kept it and we paid for the one that they accidentally made. But they made another one and they rushed it and it just wasn't cooked as well because they were rushing it. Right, So I just ate the sauce and the veggies and just part of me, like my brain, it's a weird thing to do. It's just like, eat

the sauce and the veggies on top of the pizza. People. Most people would be like, just sauce and veggies, Like that's so gross. Why do you like that? I just do. I just do. You know, I don't need I'm I'm kind of a low carb kind of gal. I I have carbs when I want them. I wasn't. This wasn't a real This crust wasn't good enough for me to have the Carbie carbs. Do you feel waste for Do you think it's just weird what you just said, Hey, let me get veggies with marinair sauce. I mean, why

is that not an option? Should be? It should be? But you know I wanted the crust. If it was gonna be good crust, I didn't know. And it's just it's too much to explain. And also, are you worried how you're gonna see on camera? That's what I was saying, it was, I was. I'm generally me a year ago, two years ago would have eaten two slices, even though

like it wasn't what I wanted to do. And then I maybe would have like like when they when I thought someone else was talking and the camera would be on them, I would have eaten the like toppings off here and there. I get what you're saying that the camera. Like midway through dinner, I realized I was eating like I eat yeah, like you forget the cameras are there?

You know your boy goes after the hummas And I get hummas on my fingers and then I'm looking my I'm sure it looks like going to see that are really disturbing. But you know, like that dinner though, I was with you, Kirsten and Chris my Axe, and like if everyone those people accepted me for how I eat, like and if I don't need anyone else's and my parents definitely do. I don't need anyone else's acceptance about how I eat. I just if these people can see

how I eat and still like me, I'm good to go. Look, you know the person that eats a sandwich and they make like my mom used to make every sandwich and open face sandwich because you didn't want double the carbs. And it's a little weird to see the whole saying, like you're seeing what's inside you end let's be honest, you end up eating the whole thing, but you kind

of separated. It's so funny when you split the sand I used to you know, eat six inches and put in the fridge for three hours later twenty minutes later, Yeah, I'm eating. Yeah, Like when you I've seen you like eat the toppings of like the like I did, like eat the toppings and then you eat the crust, and it's like you carve the dough before the crust, so whatever.

But I'm saying there's millions of people that will make an open face sandwids that are kind of weird and picky how they eat, and we don't all eat like or something, so it's like, who gives a fuck. There's no way that I'm not going to have weird food things with what my life used to be with regarding food, and now that I actually feed myself and I'm never starving myself, I'm never trying to, like I'm never I never eat four a for for um so that I don't so that I'm not fat or so that I

stay stay. I'm just eating because it's like what I want. Like, yeah, I said, I don't like carbs because carves make me just feel like I'd rather have something else in that stead, but that tastes better to me than like carves. Like I know, carbs will fill me up and then I'll be like, oh I got filled up with that crust that wasn't even that good. Like I just always want what I want to to get the amount, and I'm not trying but even so that I'm I'm not ever trying to be to eat to lose weight or to

manage my weight, and I'm just eating for enjoyment. Um. I like weird fucking things, and I like eating the toppings off a pizza. And then I at the end of it, I stacked all of the because it just looked weird with it just looks kind of gross with this like kind of picked apart pizza. So I took all the slices and stacked them on top of each other so it would just be more consolidated. And then the guy came over again. It was just like, what is this And I was just like, I don't know.

That's like when you eat one bite of peas and then you put them you like spread them apart to make it look like you ate more. Look watching Love on the Spectrum last night, Love on the Spectrum, the guy loving his dinosaurs, the girl or the one loving the swords or whatever, the girl, and they all have these who they are, and there's God, we could all be so lucky to have that kind of freedom of like they weren't ever trying to look a certain way

for the camera. Like sometimes you go sometimes you watch the show and you get nervous for them because you're like they're they're they're so nervous. It's like they feel nerves because they like want something to go the way they want it to. But they're never trying to look a certain way or get a false y thing out of someone. It's just so beautiful, very pure, and it makes me like, Okay, you know, here's something that I

like to do, or here's something I don't know. You just feel more appreciative of like why you like and being okay with that. And I think that we can learn from that. We talked about that on the show last night, Like I did not like just the things you feel that you like that you you can't help what you like and and sometimes you know that goes

into some illegal territory. I would even say those people can't help what they like, and that doesn't mean that they should be able to do the things that they like, but that they should be able to actually tell someone that they like those things and find a way to manage it. Like I like smoking all day, Yes, but that's and that's okay that that's what I like to do, because that is giving me something that I can't I can't help that I like that. There's no I don't

get to choose that I like that. No, no one would choose that a meth addict love smoking meth. They didn't get to choose that they like meth. And you might think it's a choice, but it's just not like that's no one once no one signs up for life and says, of all the things, I want to do that, And you could argue, but they chose to do math at one point. But it's even that they didn't choose to have the to you know, no free will DM me if you want to look into it. But I

we talked about last night. I really didn't learn until the age of like thirty, that feelings we're not something that you have a choice of. No what did you did you ever feel guilty for your feelings? And by the way, feelings not just being like I'm scared of this, or I don't like this, or um, I'm mad, but like what you were saying of like autistic people on

the show, they like dinosaurs. There's a thirty year old man who loves dinosaurs and says, I want to honor them, these great beasts that walked, these magical beasts that walked to earth. I honor and love them and pay respect to them for what they've for the how they want to the world. And it was just like a lot of us are made to feel guilty for having chow hood uh like obsessions and likes as an adult, Like you have to grow out of them, and you don't have to grow out of them. They could just be

part of your life, but you don't have to. Like those things made you so happy and fulfilled, don't throw them away. Don't put him in a box in the garage. Take your dinosaurs out of the garage and put him in the living room. And if your if your husband divorces you because of it, or your wife leaves you, you got the dinosaurs to you know, you're watching with your pizza in the dark. Yeah, like the childhood things

like making you happy. Chris even on the show last night, was like, oh my god, I just he has like race car pictures in his bedroom. Ronan on the show and Chris is like, I just bought that same exact race car pantwer from my and I was like, I am so glad you did that, because that is kind of a childish thing to do. Is have a picture of a race car. But if it makes you fucking happy,

just do it. If it brings you back nostalgia, Yes, Michael Jackson went a little far with the I'm living in a like a boy and I'm making my life a child's life. If you if there was all the things that you allegedly did were not true. It's fine that he liked kids stuff. This is why people love sports because you get to hold onto your tea ball days and you just buy another guy's jersey and you wear them for the rest of your life and no one questioned you. Because that sports, you can love your

team until you're ninety eight. Don't you dare have a poster of in Sync on your wall or a poster of Mahomes or whatever? You know, like you can't still, yeah, you can't have a poster, but you should be able to know. It has to be a fat head now because those are for adults. You know, what do you? What do you think about all this? One thing that I learned um from a relationship book called Getting the Love You Want. Oh that's another one that everyone tells

me changes everything. But an important thing that I learned is that as adults, we look to complete our childhood and I think that can be applied to many things. So for me, all the like sports and stuff that I had, my parents didn't really invest in me. Um, I get to do as an adult and I get to try them all over again. But I'm in control of the situation and I think it's brought me a

lot of enrichment to my life. I love that and we we did talk about that with you of like why are you going what do you what are you doing riding horses? Like where did this come from? What do you even linking wrestling late in life? Like these are things that you were didn't maybe you have exposure to early on that would have Like I would say with Taylor Swift, it would have served me so much to have her in high school. And I'm making up for lost time. I'm healing that fifteen year old that

needed that emotional support. And oh my gosh, I have so much to say real quick. Um, oh gosh, what was I going to say about this, the sport thing that you're going back and doing. Um? Well, I actually I had a teacher right to me this weekend. Well, I had a bunch of weird things happen this weekend with teachers. We gotta get to the news. But like, first of all, my my favorite teacher of all time, um, Mrs Madam Calfiss the Um she's still at Kirkwood High School.

She teaches alongside my sister. Um. She uh wrote to me. I asked her to come to the show this weekend. Um, because all the cameras following me were like, he is there anyone from your past that would be cool to come to your show? And I was like, oh, Madam Calfis, Like she means so much to me. She's come to a bunch of my comedy shows. She's you know, works with my sister. She's still like in my life, sees

my instagram, makes hard eyes on things. And um, she couldn't go because she was going to Brandy Carlisle that night, which like what a cool fucking woman. So I'm like, if anyone is going to trump my show, it's old BC Brandy Carlisle, who I met at the I Heart Awards because I sat next to her wife, uh in Usher's little circle. Um, I was sitting after this woman who was very nice, but I thought she was like

a publicist and I had been done. I'm done with my delivering my um doing my part that I was nervous out and then I'm like, I'm just here to party now, sitting with next machine gun Kelly Megan Fox, Uh, this this broad next to me? Who's someone important? And I and she's so nice and I go. She was like, oh, that was really funny, good job. And I was like, thank you. I'm so excited. I'm don what do you? Who are you here with someone? Who are you? And she's like, oh, my wife is you know? Doing the

Elton John tribute. I'm like, who's your wife? And she's like Brandy Carlisle. I'm like, get the funk out of town. I was like, I love her. And then Brandy comes and sits down. We have a great time. That's the only interaction I've had with Brandy. But she was in St. Louis. The same guy as my show, Madam Calfis went to her show and said, so, I asked Madam Calfis if she could go. She goes, um, I give an arm and a leg to come see you, my dearest Nicky.

You and Lauren became a French for lesson this last week. I don't know what that means. But I've got Brandy Carlisle tickets tomorrow night. I will definitely be in the front row next time. So cool that you have a bunch of cameras following you. That's what she said. That's what she didn't say, but something else, love you. She goes, love you twee, which, by the way, in French we got to make up it like when you got to pick like French names. These used to do that in

like Spanish. Yeah, I was Kiki Twee because I liked both the name Kiki because it was like, I'm like Nikki and tweet t h u y is like I just thought it's like a cool like k tweet. So I was Kiki Twee. And she called she said, she reminded I didn't even remember that was my name. So then I go, UM, I said, thank you so much. Um, I love Brandy. You have so much fun. Then um, I said, please let me know. I go, um. She said, bring your cameras to KHS High School. I go, I'm

trying to. I want to do a talk for girls. They're like a ted talk kind of thing. And she said, please let me know if I can help blah blah. Then before my show, when she's probably getting up getting ready to go to Brandy Carlisle, she wrote me, give him heck tonight. I got emotion. She'll read this, Okay, I didn't get I didn't read this until it's coming home from my show. She goes, give give them heck tonight. Nikki, you are a courageous, creative soul. Your path is glamorous,

but I'm sure it's not always easy at heart. I know you are the girl who loves animals and the bird you had in high school, and your family and bringing joy and laughter to the world. Thank you, And I said, I want to get that fucking tattooed on me.

Thats the one, But yeah, that would be dope. I mean, it's great that you connected with a teacher like that, and dude, you kind of forget, like we forget that the teacher like we're their stories, you know what I mean, Like she is proud of you, like you were like connected to her, like we forget. You know, it's like anything you just see your teachers. That's a teacher that's not even a human, but they're on the other end being like I taught Nikki, she was this. I saw

this about her. I knew that Okiki Twee would be selling out, you know, the factory. She You know, I got interaxia, like right when she very French, I don't know, just being skinny, like you smoke a cigarette. Second shirts with horizontal stripe and not so I feel like, you know, like frenchman with the black and white stripes, you know, horizontal. Um so uh no, she she was on bed rest. Mine. I only got into AP French because I was sucked at French, terrible at it always a struggle. I only

did AP French because she was the teacher. Then we start school and she is pregnant and she gets bedridden and so she can't even teach us. We get a new teacher who was also pretty good. But I only wanted Madam Calfis like she was like I was like kind of in love with her, like really really needed her. She was around on love happened. Then she got bed rest. Okay, so like right after our senior year started, boom, she's gone in bed. That child is now like twenty right,

but um she came back. She after she gave birth. She came back in at the very end of the year she took all the AP French students out to Macaroni Grill and we had I had not seen her since back in September before she left, and by May of two thousand two, I was like on my way to death, like I was. I I remember we went to Macaroni Girl and I mean, this comes back around. This is so weird. Sorry, no one will get in news.

I ordered pasta like it was Macaroni Girl. There was nothing on the menu that I could eat as an antirectic, like literally nothing. I was freaked out about it. And I remember telling the waiter can you put no oil in it? Like I was so scared of oil, so scared. I was like can you just do because I was scared of fat because pasta didn't have fat, but like

oil and I was like no oil. And I just remember her like kind of seeing through it and being like okay, like and I just remember being like, oh no, she knows, and like she I just don't want her to think less of me, and she knows I'm up to something, and I like, I think I really like shut her out after that, But she always was the one that made me feel like like okay about being who I was and like liking the things I liked and being bad at front and that it was hey

and that I was still like, you know something I could get good at. It's really weird because I just started watching a SMR videos of women talking in French because there's something so soothing about the woman who was like amazing me like talking and it's like, oh, maybe I can start French again, so I might do that. Um, let's get to thank you for letting plife. I saw Brandy Carlisle, she's saying with John Prine. She was so

fucking good. Start Alive, Yeah, Stergill Simpson, then Brandy Carlisle and John She came out and sang with John Prine. What a concert that was by my favorite concerts. She she's incredible. I gotta get into her more, but it's just so hard for me to get into new music. That's gonna help. Okay, let's get to the news first. I have like, do you ever get muscle spasms? Yeah? I have a muscle spasm, and really I feel my body twitching and I'm like, oh my god, it's like

a little aliens. It's almost like a baby's kicking in my eye. You know what that's that's I'm gonna change my thought process because I have. That's better though I feel like it's not up to me, but it's like right next to like kind of where my heart is. So the old Andrew would go, is that my chest?

Or is that my heart not beating correctly? I think you're in love, miss Brenna much new episode of Puddles with Puddle Andrew's Andrew's podcast if you want to check it out him and um Brenna his girlfriend or she might be the new permanent co host. Honestly, okay, thank you so much and have all the swells. Good job. Not drinking enough water probably causes the little baby muscle spasms you know us might leave you with less energy. Brain fog affect your focus, so you're breathing in heart

rate maybe faster than normal. You can overheat and you might feel confused or cranky. We you know you're supposed to drink six glasses of water per day. How much water do we drink? Nick, dude, I'm not even joking you. Some days zero zero I got. I mean it's in the spin drift I'm drinking. It's sparkling water listen if if my body needed I listen to what my body needs, and sometimes it does fucking need water and I chug

some water. I'm I'm in tune. I'm not going to be one of these people that I used to chug water so I could just get it in because I knew it was gonna be good for my skin. I'm not doing that anymore. I'm just if my body needs it, I'll get it. I will be more mindful of that and like, but I trust now that I like putting things in my body that feel good. And I'm not going to beat myself up anymore about the not getting enough water. I can't do it because then I start

drowning myself with water and I feel sick. Yes, you can overdo it. Mick Jagger was really chugging it down the other night, and it was like I was film it, Like he would show up on the big screen like dancing, and then they would go over to Keith Ridgards and that's when he would go for his water bottle, and I'm like, I want to know what water bottle he has because it looks so efficient and cool. I feel like he is probably insanely ain't all about what he

puts in his body. Because you said ain't I got yeah. I can feel that I'm ain't all about what I put in my body too, because he wants to still be Like there's something about a seventy eight year old man that still wants to look sexy. Like telling you every person and that god damn building googled Hick Jagger age Mick Jagger health regimen. I learned that he runs up to eight miles a day. He eats, Yeah, I mean this is what this is what Bruce Springsteen does.

He comes home from concerts where he performs for four hours with like four encores and then runs five miles on the treadmill. Uh, cooks up a delicious meal like he just is one of these hyper productive, like go go go clean eating people. And I feel like if we I was talking to Kristen about it last night eight and her whole I love Kirsten's method or her like, I'm so excited to bring her to the world if

you heard her, like you get it. She's just like an amazing person to put in front of these cameras that are following me around to show someone who I always projected so much perfection on because she does have a perfect body in quotes, perfect hair, perfect skin, like every she just is like a happy person, like you're just like God. She just is kind of perfect, and

it can be eared. It used to really bother me and make me so jealous and feel a lot of like self hatred because I couldn't be her no matter how hard I tried, even though she brought me so much joy, there was always this like subconscious like resentment that I couldn't be her. But now it's like I was talking to her or I heard her talking to someone about how she trains people, and it goes to like, she's a she's one of the best trainers in America.

I'm I'm, I would I would venture to guess she climbed the ranks of this really prestigious UM Health Center in Kansas City, the best gym in Kansas City, very you know, expensive to join. She's the most one of the most expensive trainers definitely in UM Kansas City. And she um what she does. She's not telling people what to eat and like you gotta count your macros and you gotta get this much in and and if you

don't do this, you're wrong. She was like, I'm the kind of trainer that's going to tell you not what to eat, how many carbs, how many like milligrams of this protein powders to do, but like read a read a book before you go to bed, go to bed early, wake up early, journal, like wear clothes that feel good on you. And but we're at the same time, she totally works, like she's a genius when it comes to fitness and what to do. But she's never going to tell someone they need to lose weight or they need

to get abs or you know, because that's that's not sustainable. Yeah, it's interesting, like how you set a goal, Like what your goal is? Someone goes, well, my goal is I want to see four, all five, six of my abs. That's my goal. It's like, you know, when what's that quote where you like if you build a house, but then if you build like a synagogue or a church, there's more passion behind it, you know what I'm talking about? Like no, but but like it gives whoever is building

it a reason to build it. Right, These people like instead of like just focusing, I have a I have a trip coming up, and I need to get in shape for it. No, it's more about being like healthy and balanced eight year old man counting macros. Give me a fucking break. No, I honestly think I bet he does things that feel good for him, Like I bet eight running eight miles for him is not like, oh, I gotta get up and do it because I want to look a certain way. It's like, this helps me

perform with the energy that I like. That makes me the happiest. Like and maybe you can argue it makes me happy to have abs, okay, But when your abs go away, when you're an older person, or let's say you get into a car accident and you're in a wheelchair and you can't have abs, or your your limbs atrophy, are you gonna be okay? Is that? Are you gonna kill yourself? Like? Or what? When your happiness and your

self worth is wrapped up in those physical things. And listen, I'm not free of the burden of self obsession and body image. But I just know that when I hear a trainer tell a woman who's pregnant on the fucking stair climber next to me, um that she needs to start eating. He was. I remember he was describing a smoothie that she she should have for two of her meals. And I was like, that's smoothie is less than two

hundred calories, like I know. And I just said, I'm sorry, she's pregnant and you're making her do a workout right now where she's already burned two so all her whole her lunch is two D And he goes, I'm sorry. I was I talking to you, and I go, no, but I can't help but hear that you're advising a pregnant woman to restrict her new tril ship. Like what

the trainers that come from that perspective? That's when I would hide in the bathtroom then there for twenty years of and I just want other people to give up this, like diet culture. What about this though? Mick Jagger or Turkey? Are you ready? Oh yeah, let's play Mick Jagger or Turkey an impression and it's either a Mick Jagger impression or a turkey. Um, definitely a turkey. No, that was Mick Jagger. Okay, okay, do it. Let's do it again.

That's a turkey. That's a fucking turkey again. Okay, all right, last one, here we go you could try, Okay, one more, that's I mean a hundred percent Jagger, Yes, got it? Wow, it was Mick Jagger the whole time. What would turkey look like if you did it? Though? I guess you got to keep playing the game. I just you know what it's to be sassy turkey, turkey that got pardoned on Thanksgiving by the president. Like that just comes back to the rous, Like you know that was going to

be our bird for America. The turkey, it's could be so much smarter than the eat. Did you know the velociraptor was really the size of a turkey? That actually blew my mind? Yeah? I knew. I knew about it from Reddit. Hey, um Andrew? Uh? Next news story? Water, I gotta I have to drink more water. But guess what I get to drink more water if I want to? Well. A part of the article said that um seltzer could be counted as water. Hold on, you just quickly see

before Andrew moves on sparkling water. Fruit tease without sugar can also be another healthy way to increase water comes Okay, well, guess what old canhead is going to keep on sipping the seeds? I do ate zv as a day at least those are there, Seltzer, you'd be dead if you were drinking water. People, someone send me. It's like stevia is bad for you. Will someone send me? Like why? Or if you're a company out there, can you just send us a lot of water zvia? What what are

you doing? Every single photograph I have myself has a zvia in my hands. You should literally be the head of their company. I shouldn't invest because it's delicious. And I met a guy on the road who goes When I saw Zevia was on your writer, I was like, that's my girl. I'm going to enjoy this girl. And are you addicted to And he was like, oh, I go through like forty cans in like three days. Like he was like, he's worse than me. I mean, people love Celsius because we talked about I think we talked

about it more than Zevia. But if if you want to drink, that is going to change your life and get you addicted. And it's kind of expensive though. Ginger rupier is my jam, so is the cream soda? Okay? At edna uh an edna woman, I don't know what edna means. I don't know what. Actually, it's probably like a small town and from wherever this local news story. Yes, this woman who wanted what if? Her name was Edna?

Some woman, a woman Natum wanted to spend more time with her boyfriend, but she was arrested after she directed two separate bomb threats to where he worked. So he worked at a factory. She wanted to hang out with him longer, so she made bomb threats. Talk about love. I mean, was he in on this? Like you know, I don't think so, Jeff. His whole office had to be evacuated. They lost a lot of money for her to get some dick for another two did how much

of Bachelor in Paradise did they get through together? Like, I don't know what she wanted them? You know what? Like like how do you get to that? I'm not kidding you, Like no, I thank you for choosing this, Like I want the I want my partner to be, you know, my best friend, like someone that you know, not the same best friend that is my best friend or Andrew's my best friend. But I want someone around that I can like that I love being around, and that will be around me as much as possible because

I want. Yeah, I want like a life partner, and I want someone who because I make enough money, I just feel like for two people and I don't plan on really having kids. I don't want them to really work unless the work they do brings them immense joy and doesn't cause them stress outside of work. Like I don't want someone and if they're working a factor, like if we're working a job that doesn't bring them joy, get out of that. Just come on the road with me, or you know, you don't have to be on the

road with me. But like, if let's say that they were like you and they liked golfing, I'd be like, just go on the road with me and just go golf during the day and then come to the shows at night and hang out with me and my friends, and yeah, I love you. Know, work really does take um. If you're dating someone who like is gone a lot working or their job, it's it's hard because you want if they don't like their job, you want to change it for them, But then they also just want you

to listen. They don't want you to like try to fix it. But they end up working with these people that they work with that drive them crazy because you hear about them just as much. But have you ever heard this? This was an interesting thing that I remembered from a book called The Dance of Anger that I

made my ex boyfriend listen to. Yeah, that's getting in it. Um. It was called Dance of Anger, and we audio booked it on our cross country drive when we moved from New York to l A. And I don't remember anything from this book, But the other day he reminded me of something that when someone is getting angry about something, like say, I'm bitching about um, like I was supposed to get this pet like today when I was like, there's all these boxes and I don't know what to

do with all of them. When you go, god damn it, Yes, why are these books? When you join it, you it's it takes away my feeld, Like you, there's only it when when when your partner gets angry, listening is so much better than joining in and adding to it. Not because it adds to the fire, but because that person, that person's anger is their own and let them have it, and it's best for you and them to not I forget how he phrased it with my ex boyfriend. So

what should you do listen, okay, bitch to me? No, no, go ahead, go ahead, talk about the boxes. What should I do? You said you talk about you be me these fucking boxes. I keep getting boxes. I don't know what to do. It's piling up. I gotta bring it the recycling. I don't understand why I need more things. I don't need more things. It's really, it's so that sounds so frustrating. I really I relate to feeling that frustrated. You don't think I need to make a switch, though,

I feel like I gotta stop ordering things. Obviously I'm just a idiot. I think I don't think you're an idiot, and I think you should just I think, you know, just feel this feeling, and maybe it'll lead you naturally to doing the right thing instead of beating yourself about what you should be doing. I feel like you you definitely did this for a reason, and it'll you'll you'll figure you'll you'll be okay. But I totally understand your frustration right now and I and now that we shouldn't

do okay, fucking boxes are piling up. I just can't keep boarding stuff. I mean, it's I when I ordered, they're they're everywhere. That's a huge mass. And then your hands get all dry when you break down the boxes, and like you, then you your cuticles start ripping, and then you start picking up those because you're because I keep watching you rip out your cuticles and you're bleeding all over our apartment and it's just there's blood on

the cabinets. But that's kind of fun to double up on the blood on the cabinets and us I mean pizza. K Yeah, yeah, there is. My baby left me because she said there's no spark. Let's take a quick break and come back with why do I get all? Right? Andrew? Why do I? Why do I care? I think you're gonna care about this one? Okay. Will Smith told his life coach he wanted a harem of girlfriends in his

late or in his twenties. He loved the idea of traveling with twenty different women that he loved and took care of. He also admitted to being attracted to Halle Berry and the ballerina Misty Copeland. I remember seeing Mr Copeland as one of these women that he wanted in his harem. Yeah, he's had the process of speaking about it had him realized that thoughts were not sins, and even acting on impure thoughts didn't make him a piece of ship. There, you, he can't help how he feels.

He wants a fucking arem. He wants a hare m that doesn't make him a bad person. His actions uh to acquire that harem could lead to things that would make him feel like if he decided to do an R Kelly and have you know sex slaves because R Kelly wanted the same thing, right, Yeah, maybe in a different way, but like he went about that, he he didn't.

He didn't have the same introspective R Kelly got to hear him, Like how that lady got her husband to hang out with her more, Yes by calling bomb threats. Now Will Smith can do a year way by just working six jobs and being able to for him. Yeah, well that's true. Yeah, that wants to get to work. Yeah. I'm really looking forward to Will Smith's autobiography, which is

called Will and Neil Brennan. My friend was posting about how Will was the one that exposed him to ayahuasca, and Neil actually has shared with me a really interesting video that um he had been interviewing Will for something I don't even know what. But this was years ago. And you know, Neil's a name dropper. Whenever I'm around him, he's always telling me about what famous person he knows. He's friends with the most famous people ever. He's just

he just has that energy. And I love Neil and I love his special three mix on Netflix because it talks about how he's he likes, you know, saying that he's friends with famous people and like because it gives him. I like that he's admitted like Instagram, like he's like, I've got into iwasa and here's why. It's because of Will Smith. But it's true, like but he but he shared a video with me of Will Smith talking about

um success and I'll never forget that. He said that Will had a crisis or some something of this sort of like, once you've climbed Mount Everest, if that's what you always thought would make you happy, what there's not a taller mountain. There isn't enough. If mountaineering is your thing, and you could go, well, you could go to Space that's on a mountain, right, you could climb, but you know what I mean, you can bring a pack of sexy Sherpaz with you next time. Um, yeah, that's so funny.

Um Mr Copeland might do a little couple of pleas on but but no, but they have an open relationship him and yeah. But I just remember him saying that on that clip that that um Neil shared with me, of having a crisis of like when you've achieved everything, which he will Smith had. I mean, I didn't win an oscar, but who cares? I mean, like maybe that did you take away from it? I took away from it. I'm not gonna know. I'm not going to know that feeling till I get there, but I do know that

it's true. Like I know that success does not bring happiness, like whatever we're going after, Like it just showed me that. Someday, I'm gonna I hope to understand that because obviously I want to have all the successes and every childhood story that reached the highest high popularity, I mean track records

not good. Well, Like I was talking to my mom about all these cameras around us, uh the other day, and she's, you know, concerned of how she's going to come across the same way that I would have been concerned about how someone's gonna see me eating that pizza right,

eating the toppings off. Yeah, and she's worried about her gait and in fact that she doesn't have one, and that the yard looks like ship NICKI and bah bah bah, And I go, mom, I totally understand this feeling, right, I like boxed her, like a pile of boxed her. I go, I get this feeling. I've been there. Let's follow it out. Like and then what I did with the pizza things last night, I'm like, Okay, if someone judges me about it, I went through all of this

in my head. I'm like, what are they gonna say? What are they going to think? Well? Well, and I was just like, wait a second. All I want in life, everything that I've ever wanted is love. I want money so I can secure. I want I want security, I want to feel safe, and I want love. Right, But really, all of this fame searching is about It's not so much about security because I'm financially secure, I should just stop. Then, It's about love, right and acceptance. The people at that table,

I was like, are my truest loves of my life? You, cur Sston and my ex boyfriend Chris, Like these are the people that like and I my mom and dad. They couldn't be there, but like there, I know that they love me no matter what I could do anything. I've eaten really weird things in front of them, and I go, Mom, who what's when you get insecure about something that you don't want to show the world. And this is to everyone, like think about like what's your

biggest fear? What are they going to think about you? And I go, do you? Does you having a messy storage room? I mean that you're like, what does it mean about you that I'm lazy? She goes that I'm lazy and I was like, wow, Like that is my biggest fear in life, is that people think I'm lazy, which is ironic because that's the thing that people tell me more than anything, is that how hard I work? And I hear that over and over and it doesn't

matter how many times people tell me it. I still have a fear that I'm tricking you into thinking I worked hard. It's a magic trick and it's light of hand, and I'm actually lazy and you don't know that I am. I've now accepted, like, I'm not lazy, and when I am lazy, it's self care. I stay in bed all day and and and so I told my mom, you're not lazy. She goes, and I go, I guess you could argue, well, then why don't you clean the storage closet. If it needs to be cleaned and you don't clean it,

that's probably lazy. And I go, because you wanted to watch a Housewives marathon instead of that. And she goes, I don't watch housewives. And I go, it's just an example. Whatever you did instead of doing that, you could lead you to believe like that. Like let's say you did something entertainment value that wasn't important. I go, your hang out with your nephews or your grandkids. Yeah, I go. I went to the Rolling Stones concert the other night instead of working on my act for my special. I

should have been home, probably working on my jokes. If you really, if you, if you, if you think my my my special is like the storage closet, and it's like, well guess what, and she goes, no, you, that is not the same as me laying on the couch watching TV. That's the Rolling stands, And I go, it's all the same. It's entertainment. It's not necessary because what it is you whatever you. And I always teal this to people when they just feel bad about Oh I'm fat. You not

choose to be fat. You did not press a button and go I want my thighs to look like this or whatever you're thinking about that day. You didn't choose for your storage closet to be a mess. It's a mess because you prioritize other things. Now we're the other things you were prioritiz prioritizing um that that special. Were they spending times with your grandkids? Maybe not. Maybe it was doing something like binging your kitchen cabinet and that made you fat. And now your storage closet is is full.

And also you're you're feeling fat because you ate too much. You ate pizza in the dark. Well, guess what you needed to you could. You had to have that pizza in the dark because you were feeling feelings that if you would have not had the pizza in the dark, and you would have gone, I want it so bad because I don't like this feeling. It's gonna go somewhere else the next day and it's gonna be more. It's

gonna be a lot of pizza in the daylight. You know what I'm saying, so, just forgive yourself for having a sturtary storage closet. Think about who are you so scared is gonna see this thing about you? And what are they going to think? And if they think that, what's going to happen? And are the people at your table the ones that love you? Are they judging you for your storage closet? Because I bet they're not like

the people that you are closest to. You can be yourself around and if they don't shut out their love for you because of that, then then let the world see who you really are and maybe accept yourself. It really like dawned on me last night with those cameras around, being like, all that matters is the people at this table, and the people disable represent a lot more people that aren't at this table. But because these people distable aren't

going nicky, what the fuck are you doing? You don't deserve love because you're eating pizza that way, then I think I'll be okay. Even if the message boards who watch the thing that the cameras are filming did say that I am a weird eater and I'm gross and I can't believe the thirty seven year old woman stuffs her face like that and eats like a child. Guess what, Andrew, Chris and Kristen still love me. That's all I need, That's all I wanted, And that's why I care about

that Will Smith thing. I guess and that's why I want to hear and no, Noah is like, know what you were at the table too? You know, like that table represented the people that I are closest to me. That that it doesn't matter and that's how I feel, exactly. Yeah, Like just whatever is in the room is in the room exactly, that's what matters. And I think you could be so comfortable with those people and go, oh, well,

they I'm worried about what. You know, the woman down the street thinks with the perfect lawn and the perfect hair and the perfect body, she works out every day, and why can't it be like her? Why do you is she gonna go up be at your funeral, She's

gonna shed a tear when you die. She doesn't give a funk about you stopped trying to impress her lazy cold being thought of his lazy and then being thought of his life, Like there's such a positive about Like they hustle so hard and it's like on the flip side of that, hustle so hard is avoidance of talking to your parents, avoidance of um, you know, being closer

with your friends, avoidance of doing whatever. It is, like the negative around lazy and a positive on hustle needs to kind of we need to stop that talk and that like if you're not hustling, you ain't ship. You miss out on so much when you hustle so much.

Even what's his name? When I sent you that clip logic he was talking about like how you become as good as he is, and he was like, I don't have friends, I don't have a social life, I don't I missed out a lot, and he goes part of me wants to go back to that kid who worked so fucking hard and say get outside every now and again.

Like if you're someone who enjoys, doesn't hustle and doesn't define themselves by their career and how much the what what you put out there, and how much like the world is consuming of you, maybe you're spending time with people who your quality time you spend with them is leading them to have a better life that can create that stuff, you know, like you could be adding to the input that the that's being put in the world. Um okay, let's get to reddit dump. Oh my god,

this is your reddit dum. I think you can hear karaoke mode at the beginning karaoke moon. Um okay, so so your laughter at the end. Um okay. The things I saved are all videos, and I regret this, but you guys gotta like, I don't know if I can zoom in on them when I could put the links on somewhere. Yeah, I mean, has anyone seen the footage of Hitler at a horse riding contest and he's high.

They say he's high on meth, but a lot of the comments are saying he had like pretty late stage parkins is at this point this video was slightly sped up. Slightly okay, But even if it's slightly sped up, you tell me how fucking insane You sure it's not Charlie Chapin, No, dude, this is Hitler and it says Hitler high. And this is from the Sorry, this is from the subred interesting Jeff's g I f s press replay on that. This

is I can't believe more people don't see this. Wow, you guys he is rocking back and forth in his chair like this. I mean, if you're watching the video, like like it's back and forth like one too one to want to want to and it's slightly sped up, but it's it's so insane that even if it's slowed down like three quarters the speed of it, it would still be like, why is this guy rocking back and forth so much? It's really scary. He's kind of doing

the sassy turkey. Um yeah, I think, Uh, first of all, why is there such a big crowd for a horse riding contest? Like it's not even a race. I mean maybe it was like their version of you know, the Jake Paul fight. And it was in the thirties. There

was like barely any television. That's the guy, like crazy, How one guy like that who's Google Hitler high on meth in a horse riding contest At a horse riding contests in the crowd, he has the you know, swastika on his arm and he's back and forth and I don't know if it's meth or Parkinson's, but people you know are arguing in the says the drug regimen this guy was taking on a daily basis put Jordan Belfort to shame. Someone says, me, when my ass itches but

I cannot scratch. I mean, people on Reddit are so funny, is there? Um? Someone said, uh, that fucking murderous Nazi. I hope he's burning in hell. Okay, that's that's a good comment. Gee. How much drugs did the Nazis really taken? Why? Said? Someone said? Lots? And historically things like meth and fetamine was given to soldiers by the government so they could stay up for days in battle. This of course was

also done in other others countries militaries. I mean, yeah, there's talk of like my my grandfather was a eye surgeon and he died I think in his forties. He smoked a lot and was you know, drank a lot and perhaps had some mental issues that my family you know, sweeps under the rug and doesn't really talk about. But um, there was talk of him probably popping you know, methi type pills so that he could do surgery and and work long hours and stay up and drink and then

get up in the morning and do surgery again. And this was in the six I mean, there was coke and Coca cola like whatever. It's just funny how like certain things like if enough people do them, they're the norm. So it's like and then we don't realize the repercu I mean, hopefully science is better now where we kind of have an understanding of like, you know, giving people meth it's probably not the best way for them to

work on eyes. But but like there in thirty years we could go, oh, actually, zoloft cause cancer of your you know, of your calves or whatever. And everyone's like they're going to say that the sugar is the smoking. Ryan Hamilton has a great joker. He's like, someday we're gonna be like, did you know they had there were people eating sugar on planes like the same we were talking about smoking. Yeah. Um, okay, this is from dating.

I'm sorry, this is from today. I learned the subreddit. Today, I learned t I L. If you c t I L it means today I learned today. I learned about a New Jersey history professor who was telling a story to his class about how a ranger saved his life in a canyon at night in Texas in nineteen forty. This is wild. The ranger had managed to track him down and coincidentally walked into the classroom right as the professor was telling the story. Are you listening to what

I'm saying? So the guy got saved by a range here's the here's the article Tuesday from December because he found the so okay. Royce Burton was teaching history at a New Jersey university when he decided to tell his class about a frightening experience he had as a young man. He was a Texas ranger. This is a Rio Grande at Rio Grande ninety. He got lost in a canyon after dark. Beats after dark. He tried to climb out, but he lost his balanced. Suddenly, a fellow ranger appeared

and hoisted him to safety with his rifle strap. He thanked this guy for saving his life, but lost contact with him and after both men enlisted in the in World War Two. Um so. Then, twenty five years later, Burton was in the middle of sharing his story when an elderly man appeared in the doorway. It was Joe, the fellow ranger. He had tracked Burton down twenty five years later and walked into his classroom at precisely the

moment that he was recounting his rescue. He said, He goes, I'll have Joe finished the rest of the story, Burton said, without missing a beat, as the astonished classroom witnessed the two men's reunion. Um Synchronicity is a term coined by Carl Young, the Swiss psychiatrist and mystic. It is the currence of two events that have no apparent cause and effect relation, but are nonetheless connected by meaning, often in profound ways. Synchronicity is an odd term, but it's a

familiar experience to many people. So when dreams of a childhood friend he hasn't heard from in years, and gets a phone call from that friend the next day, you know, these are the coincidences that we go. You won't believe this, This is a sign from the universe. The thing is, I listened to a Radio Lab episode and I believe it's called synchronicity. Uh, and it's from years ago. Chang Wang, the comedian, recommended to me we were driving to Sabrina

Jelize's wedding in Vermont from New York. He's so funny. He goes, have you have you never heard Radio Lap And I was like no, and he goes, dude, dude, there's an episode you've got to listen to. And it's called I think It's balloon, and it just talks about these things in life that you go the there was a there was a balloon that a girl let go of and she tied a note to it, and it flew forty kilometers away and landed in a bush and that bush was and then the father who owned the

house that that bush fell into. This is the story, picked up the balloon and it said, you know, whoever finds this, please reach out to Sarah Burton, and then gave her address. He is the father of a girl whose name is Sarah Burton, who's the same age. Uh like this, like I had a bunch of like the same like the same birthday or something. And the thing is, people go, what the how? What are the odds? The odds are astronomically low. But the thing is, it happens.

And they gave a perfect example, and this takes us into final thought, a perfect example of this when when something in your life happens coincidentally, like you dream of something and someone or you go, I was just talking about this person and they just called me. I haven't talked about this person in five years and they call me. Now, it's probably not God or the universe, even though I do believe in science and I like to give meaning to them. This is this gives you. It's bound to happen.

Sometimes these things are abound. Your life has so many different You've met thousands of people in your life, and every day and every year, thousands of people call you at some point, both of those things and thousand people, as you know, and the thousand people that call you are going to line up in a weird way and think of this. Oh my god, this person I had a dream about two nights ago called me today. Well, if it was really a sign, why wouldn't you have

dreamed about them last night? Why was it two nights ago? You know what I'm saying, Like, it's a little bit. People kind of go. But the one of you, well, who knows how many times that guy has told that story exactly. And here's another thing. When there is a

field of grass. Let's say there's a huge field and there's probably hundreds of thousands shards of grass maybe uh millions, right, and you throw a lawn dart right and every blade of grass is going, Oh my god, I hope it doesn't hit me, or like, if it hits me, that will be wild, Like what a sign. It's gotta hit one of them. You know, it's not gonna not hit any of them. It's gonna one of those blades of grass is gonna feel like I'm special. But guess what,

it had to hit one. There's nothing special about the the definite occurrence of one of those blades of grass being hit. There's one one of them is going to get hit, right, but that one, when it's you, you feel so special, like you feel like, oh my God, like it came to me and my grandfather caught a foul ball on the same day and his funeral is

next week. He just died two weeks ago. It's like, you can ascribe all this meaning, but your life has millions of variables, and if you want to, you can ascribe meaning to anything, and it it takes some of the magic out of life. But that's not what you know.

That's the same thing as tarot cards. I don't really believe tarot is mystical, and actually, you know, is connected to actual things that I'm like, Okay, this is an absolute, absolute truth, but it allows you to interpret your life in a new way and to see your life from

a different lens. So if you know your aunt bee dies and then a bee lands on your shoulder and makes you go, oh my god, that's my aunt be talking to me Like, maybe you needed your auntie there that day because you have a job interview tomorrow and you're nervous about it. And can you remember a moment where like things lined up. I remember a few. Well, one I was at a Bulls game and they threw

a ball, the Bulls brothers. It was like the Blues brothers and they threw a ball and it's like, what's that game in the prices right where where like bounces Like yeah, I think that's how you make fried tempora. But like and so it freaking plank coat off like fifteen other people. And I literally have a coke and like a hot dog in my hand and it just fell perfectly right in my lap and I go, like I with my mom, Like it was just like one of those things at the best moment of your life.

I mean it was up there with like at that point in my life. Yeah, it was pretty freaking cool. But like I had moments like I was in California. I remember when I was like twelve or something and I'm in this like obscure restaurant middle of nowhere. Maybe there's like ten people in there, and one of my best friends from camp is there with his family. He's one of the ten, and I'm like, what what is that? Yeah,

you know, you go. But then you're like, well, the haves a certain amount of money and his family, right, they travel a certain amount. There's there's websites that direct you to the places to go that are cool in town. And they went to the same website because you guys searched the same things from the same campers. That would

have probably surprised me. Y, have you had a moment like that though, like um, you were like far away from something or you know, like I I remember I you know, I've talked about how like I recently believe in God and like I'm much more spiritual, But when I was a kid, I was not allowed to like believe in just my parents were like that was like yeah, like there's no there's no God in my ounse. But I used to pray. And I remember one time praying.

I was, um, it was fifth grade and I was I was going out with a boy like it was my first boyfriend and he asked me out Diego vs. He has asked me out on the bus. And I really didn't want anyone to find out about it because I was just like, I don't want to do anything with it, Like I don't I was just like, I don't even want a boyfriend. I'm like doing this because

it's like, oh my God. And I would remember staying up that night and like not being able to sleep and just being like I just knew that if Tyler Schoonover found out about it, he would be like, why is Diego dating Nikki Glazer, Like she's a nerd? And then everyone would like hear that I was a nerd. And it was like for some reason, I really didn't want Tyler schoon o Over to be at school like

I was just but he was never absent ever. And I remember praying to God and I had this weird ritual where God would only answer my prayers if I laid in bed in a way that I had never

laid before. So I would have to be like, I'll cross my fingers in a weird way and then my leg I would have to make a shape with my body that had never been made before, which isn't hard to do because like there's enough variables in your body that you can I would lay like this and be like, please, God, have Tyler schoonover, please, And he was sick from school the next day. And that made me believe in the power of making my body into a weird shape and

praying for things. And I never really tested again because it was too scared that yesterday because I didn't want the power to be taken because I knew it was a coincidence. I knew it was a coincidence. Even then, I was like this, thank God, this is just me being O c D. It would have been such a different story depending on how sick Tyler got, like if it was like Tyler is cool now and he like like him a lot of luck. But back then I

was just so scared. But eventually Mrs Grow did find out about me, and Mrs Grow was my teacher and someone told her and I remember it was like slow motion. It was like that um black Hole Sun video of like in your face, like like and she just goes Nicky and Diego sitting yeah, because everyone was like NICKI and Diego are dating and she but it wasn't mean. She was just playing like she was kind of happy for me because I was a door and she was like, oh NICKI, and she really said it like that, but

to me it was like nicky. And I was like black hole sick, won't chick come, won't chick come? Black hole son, and like dripping blood and like melting yeah, yeah, yeah, how long we're still together? We never broke up? That was my joke. I saw him again in high school at Tree Court, my pool, and he was there and I and I and I actually wrote him, I think on Facebook in college and wrote him and was like,

technically we're still dating because we never broke up. He switched schools in sixth grade, so I never saw him again. But he better not be fucking married and cheating on me because we never broke up. Diego when I want you to know you if you're out there, diego v. I look for him all the time because he was so cute. I think he's probably a doctor. He was so smart and just like so cute doctor. Yeah, diego.

I'm giving my vagina for you to examine, because I really do need to go get a badge exam not and there's nothing wrong. It's just I need my annual. I got you Okay, Guys, with that we are, I'd rather you sing Brandy Carlyle to me than ever make that joke again. Thank you for listening to the show today. We'll be back tomorrow with more show. Make sure to subscribe to our YouTube channel. We are live on YouTube.

Luigi you look cute as fun. If you want to see how cute Luigi is, you've gotta go on there. You are so cute. What the fuck? Guys don't be cut out there? And I can't believe we haven't done that one yet. I don't know if we have. It's the ones that are so right there.