In this first episode of Us, Unfiltered: Behind the Beautiful Life , I speak to high-achieving couples who appear successful on the outside yet feel disconnected at home. Life is full, you’re doing everything “right,” but the closeness you want has faded behind the busyness. Achievement builds strong skills, but connection requires different ones. And the habits that help you excel — control, efficiency, staying in motion — can quietly block intimacy. I name the early warning signs: staying late...
Dec 08, 2025•27 min
I’m challenging the question, Am I a terrible person ? I explain why that question keeps you stuck in shame and judgment. I offer better questions: How is this serving me, and how is it not? I walk through real examples, like not wanting to stop an affair and withholding love from a good man. We look at the short-term hits and the real costs, including risk, stress, kids, family, and how avoiding vulnerability blocks connection. I’m not here to judge. I’m here to help you make conscious choices ...
Dec 01, 2025•12 min•Ep. 179
I share the story of a woman who followed my work for 10 years before she reached out, hoping the next blog or podcast might fix her 20-year marriage. Once we finally worked together, she and her husband became more connected than ever. I talk about why we wait: saying it out loud makes it real. The unknown feels scary. We hope things change on their own. We want a guarantee. We worry. We don’t know what we want. We don’t want to do the work, and doing nothing feels easier. But that wait creates...
Nov 24, 2025•19 min•Ep. 178
I’m breaking down what no-fault divorce is, why it’s more recent than most people realize, and why it isn’t the villain. Laws don’t destroy marriages. People do. What really ends marriages: Neglect Shutting down Avoiding hard conversations Blaming instead of owning our part Getting defensive Invalidating each other Turning love into a transaction Not listening And finally, indifference. A no-fault divorce gives you the freedom to choose your reasons, and the only person who has to make peace wit...
Nov 17, 2025•12 min•Ep. 177
In this episode, I break down the difference between therapy and coaching without making one better than the other. Therapy helps you understand how you got here. Coaching helps you decide where you want to go and how to get there. We talk about timing, momentum, and why most couples wait too long to ask for help. I share when to choose individual or couples work, and why one person showing up differently can still spark change. We also look at quick fixes that don’t heal deeper issues and the i...
Nov 10, 2025•31 min•Ep. 176
I know it’s easy to get caught up in life and forget to prioritize your marriage. But the truth is, nothing thrives when you turn your back on it. We’ll invest in Botox, hair appointments, and our businesses—but expect our marriages to somehow take care of themselves. A healthy, connected relationship takes time, attention, and consistent effort. It’s not about perfection; it’s about showing up and learning the skills that help you grow together. If you want your marriage to feel good again, it ...
Nov 03, 2025•14 min•Ep. 175
Sometimes you have to be the one to step forward in your marriage—even if it doesn’t feel fair. Many women ask, “Why should I be the one to do the work when he’s the one with the problem?” But someone has to nudge the relationship into motion. If you’re the one uncomfortable or ready for change, it may have to be you. I also talk about the role of the victim and how staying passive keeps you stuck. Using real stories, including an example from Simon Sinek about creating understanding where it se...
Oct 27, 2025•20 min•Ep. 174
This week, I want to share an experience from a couples’ weekend immersion I led. Watching a marriage transform over just a few days reminded me why I do this work. One person can absolutely create change in a relationship. When you show up differently, your partner responds differently, and a new dynamic emerges. This couple came in scared, angry, and on the brink of divorce. By the end of day one, they began seeing each other’s differences as strengths. By day three, they had a connected, lovi...
Oct 20, 2025•19 min•Ep. 173
All progress begins from telling yourself the truth. It’s easy to fall into confusion when faced with tough decisions, especially in relationships. But sometimes, the confusion we feel isn’t real. We pretend not to know the answers because we fear the work it will take to face them. It’s much easier to stay in the comfortable discomfort of not knowing, even when deep down, we do. The truth is, our brains don’t like uncertainty, and they’ll try to keep us stuck in fear. However, when you’re willi...
Oct 13, 2025•19 min•Ep. 172
I was recently a guest on Suzi Dafnis’ HerBusiness podcast, and we had an amazing conversation about the challenges women entrepreneurs face. I share why it’s so important to prioritize yourself. As business owners, we’re often pouring from an empty cup. The solution? Start with a daily practice that tells yourself, “Me first, then everyone else.” I explain how doing so not only boosts your well-being but also improves what you give to your business and relationships. We also talk about the chal...
Oct 06, 2025•30 min
Divorce isn’t just the end of a marriage, it’s the loss of a dream, a role, and often a piece of who we thought we were. Healing means allowing yourself to grieve fully without rushing, then noticing when grief has shifted from fuel to a crutch. It’s about asking yourself honest questions, moving your body, and resisting the urge to fill loneliness with another relationship too soon. Getting your soul back is really about rediscovering who you are now, trying new things, saying yes more often, n...
Sep 29, 2025•20 min•Ep. 171
Guilt is something so many of us wrestle with, especially in our relationships. For a long time, I thought guilt was useless because it’s tied to the past. But now I see it differently. There’s healthy guilt—the kind that nudges us to make amends, apologize, or do better next time—and that can help us grow. Then there’s unhealthy guilt, the kind that has us taking responsibility for things we can’t control, beating ourselves up, or carrying shame for decades. Healthy guilt reminds us our moral c...
Sep 22, 2025•25 min•Ep. 170
Relationships are rarely simple and binary thinking—believing things are either right or wrong—can harm your marriage. Human beings are complex, and so are our needs, desires, and perspectives. You can love your partner deeply and still recognize that the relationship isn’t meeting your needs. You can set boundaries and still be a kind, loving person. You can enjoy your sexuality, assert yourself, and hold yourself in high regard even when mistakes happen. Embracing nuance helps you make clearer...
Sep 15, 2025•20 min•Ep. 169
Deciding what to do in a marriage is never simple, especially when you’re questioning whether your partner’s “all in” effort is real or just words. I walk a member through how to recognize that personal growth starts inside, and real change isn’t just mental—it shows up in consistent action. We also tackle the challenge of delivering a separation or divorce decision when your partner reacts with tears, promises, or attempts to debate the past. I teach how to stay grounded, honor your own needs, ...
Sep 10, 2025•18 min•Ep. 168
Heartbreak is hard, even when the relationship you leave behind wasn’t healthy. We hold onto stories about the person and the relationship, but those stories keep us stuck. To heal, you have to see what is real. Look at the facts and be honest with yourself about why the relationship ended. Write it down, reflect, and ask yourself what worked, what didn’t, and what this is teaching you. Heartbreak is painful, but it’s also an opportunity to grow. If you step into the grief with awareness, you ca...
Sep 08, 2025•18 min•Ep. 167
When your partner gives you advice on how to love or live, it can sometimes feel like an invitation to grow. But it can also mask manipulation. One listener shares how her spiritually focused husband tells her she doesn’t know how to love and is not living in her true self. I explain how these comments often reflect his own projections, not her reality. I talk about how we can learn to trust our inner wisdom instead of being swayed by criticism, and how to create healthier conversations in our r...
Sep 03, 2025•13 min•Ep. 166
“ Healing after an affair is possible. It’s just really hard work. But so are most things that are really important to us. ” I’m sharing my two-step process for healing after an affair. I want you to know that while healing can be incredibly difficult, it’s absolutely possible. The first step is what I call “stopping the bleeding.” This is when we focus on addressing the immediate trauma and the deep pain of the betrayal. The second step is all about understanding how the affair happened, what m...
Sep 01, 2025•20 min•Ep. 165
In this episode, I share real coaching moments where we tackle some of the toughest relationship questions. One member is struggling with her husband's ongoing friendship with his ex, even after an affair. She questions whether this connection is manipulation or emotional abuse. Another member shares her frustration with her husband's porn use, and how it makes her feel inadequate. The truth is, both situations require deep introspection and boundaries. It’s not about changing your partner—it’s ...
Aug 27, 2025•16 min•Ep. 164
After more than a decade of coaching women through marriage struggles, I’ve learned that desire in long-term relationships is widely misunderstood. We think it’s a magical feeling that appears when we’re with the “right” person, that it should always be spontaneous, and that focusing on our own pleasure is selfish. The truth is, desire takes effort, intention, and a willingness to be an active participant in creating it. Familiarity, daily responsibilities, and unresolved hurts can all drain des...
Aug 25, 2025•17 min•Ep. 163
Sometimes the ache in a marriage isn’t about the big betrayals or blowout fights. It’s about not feeling emotionally comforted by your partner. In this coaching conversation, I explore how our upbringing shapes what we expect from comfort and why our partner may not naturally offer it in the way we long for. I walk through how to express those needs clearly, without criticism, so they can be heard and received. I also share why it’s okay to build a “board of directors” of trusted people who can ...
Aug 20, 2025•18 min•Ep. 162
“If I can’t communicate with my partner without asking a computer what I should say, I’m in trouble.” - Sharon Pope AI is changing every part of our lives, including our relationships. That might sound helpful, but I believe it comes with serious risks. Relationships aren’t about getting the right answer or saying the perfect thing. They’re about learning how to connect, how to repair after conflict, and how to grow alongside another person. If we turn to AI to do that work for us, we stop build...
Aug 18, 2025•16 min•Ep. 161
In this session, I coached two women who were in very different places but wrestling with the same kind of emotional weight. One had left an abusive marriage and found herself in a new relationship with someone who shows up for her in all the ways she used to crave. And yet, the rage is still there. The grief is still there. The other is still in her marriage with a good man, but the spark is gone. She’s trying to force herself to feel something that just isn’t there anymore. What I shared with ...
Aug 13, 2025•25 min•Ep. 160
Healing your marriage after an affair is possible, even when your partner doesn't know. But pretending nothing happened isn't the answer. The guilt you feel may push you to come clean, but sharing the truth can shatter your partner’s world, leaving you with even more guilt. Instead, start by getting honest with yourself. Why did you cheat? What were you running from or seeking? Once you understand your motivations, invest in your marriage in real ways. Be intentional, use relationship tools, mee...
Aug 11, 2025•16 min•Ep. 159
Sometimes our partner can’t see that we’ve changed, and keeps bracing for the backlash that used to come. One woman shared how her husband still expects to be punished when he goes out with friends, even though she’s no longer upset about it. Another is doing all the work to reconnect, but still feels no desire for her partner. And she’s wondering if that’s a sign. But desire isn’t just emotional—it’s hormonal. And it doesn’t magically reappear. It needs care. It needs attention. It needs to be ...
Aug 06, 2025•20 min•Ep. 158
Financial stress can add a lot of tension in relationships. If you're already struggling with communication issues, resentment, or emotional distance, money problems can make everything feel worse. Whether you're staying for financial reasons or struggling to see a way forward, there are always options available to you. You don’t have to suffer. With the right tools and support, you can take action, no matter whether you decide to stay or leave. Struggling to decide whether to stay or go in your...
Aug 04, 2025•13 min•Ep. 157
In this episode, I walk through how to navigate a trial separation from the emotional prep to the practical logistics. Whether you’re considering physical separation or an in-house one, this is about more than just space, it’s about clarity. I talk about how to communicate the decision, how to set clear ground rules around kids, money, and how you’ll interact, and why this kind of shift—while hard—can be a catalyst for growth. I also cover why most in-house separations don’t work long-term, and ...
Jul 30, 2025•13 min•Ep. 156
In this episode, I’m answering a big question I hear often: “ If I change how I think about my partner’s hurtful behavior… am I just letting him off the hook? ” We unpack that idea starting with how our thoughts create our feelings, and how learning to shift those thoughts is not about pretending things are okay. It’s about reclaiming your emotional power. Whether it’s something small, like not replacing the Q-tip jar lid, or something big, like lying and broken trust, I’ll show you how curiosit...
Jul 28, 2025•19 min•Ep. 155
"If you don’t know how to manage your mind, all you have is the ancient instinctual wiring from centuries ago. It’s playing out in your life in a modern world." - Sharon Pope Our hormones shape so much of how we react to each other. Women, driven by estrogen, are wired for connection and emotional harmony, while men, influenced by testosterone, tend to react to conflict with more aggression or defensiveness. I’m diving into the biological differences between men and women and how those differenc...
Jul 23, 2025•25 min•Ep. 154
In this episode, I unpack the subtle but powerful ways resistance shows up in our relationships, both in our partner and in ourselves. Whether it’s denial, blame, or even sarcasm, these are just avoidance tactics we’ve learned to protect ourselves from feeling hurt or rejected. But when every hard conversation is met with pushback, we stop having them. And when we stop having them, we stop repairing the relationship. I’ll walk you through the 12 most common forms of resistance. You’ll know how t...
Jul 21, 2025•27 min•Ep. 153
You did the best you could to love one another, and you made some mistakes along the way, and that’s what brought us here. It doesn’t mean you’re bad people. What happens when one partner finally makes changes after years of disconnection and neglect, only for the other partner to feel too far gone to trust those changes? We often wait for our partner to change, but the reality is, change comes too late for some relationships. When you're finally ready to make your decision, whether to stay or g...
Jul 16, 2025•25 min•Ep. 152
