Feeling a loss of attraction and desire for your partner is very common… even when you’re recovering your marriage to a healthy place. Many of us think that a “spicy” marriage (or an intimate connection) is what’s lost to our youthful naivety or the “magic” of something new. But it’s actually about biology . In this episode, I’m going to get a little nerdy and talk about healthy hormones, PLUS 4 practical ways you can invite desire into your marriage and your life. What You’ll Learn In This Epis...
Feb 09, 2024•26 min•Ep. 61
When’s the last time you felt truly heard by your partner? When’s the last time you enjoyed a serious conversation together… or agreed on a solution after an argument? Errors in communication are the most common problem I see with unhappy couples - because men and women communicate differently! And we often communicate for very different reasons. In this episode of The Loving Truth podcast, we’ll explore the art of communicating within a heterosexual partnership, and I’ll provide 4 tips for more...
Feb 08, 2024•18 min•Ep. 60
How do I know if my spouse is genuinely changing or not? Can I trust his new good behavior will last? What can we do if my husband wants to open our marriage and I’m not sure? How do I move forward after my husband’s emotional affair with a coworker? In this episode of The Loving Truth podcast, you’ll hear from three callers who want to understand how to encourage positive changes to make a marriage last, what to do when a partner comes out as bisexual, and how to move forward after an emotional...
Feb 01, 2024•25 min•Ep. 59
Men and women communicate very differently and for very different reasons. And if you don’t understand how and why, it’ll cause problems that strain your relationship. So what do you need to know and do differently to communicate better in your marriage In this episode of The Loving Truth podcast, you’ll learn about why men and women communicate differently, why it can cause issues, and the brain chemistry involved. I’ll also teach you four things you can do to improve the communication between ...
Jan 25, 2024•18 min•Ep. 58
You know how each person can see something different when looking at the same piece of art? Perspective is the same way. Your perspective is uniquely yours, and it’s built through belief which is shaped in the first few years of your life by multiple things like your environment and the people in it. In that way, your beliefs are also like art, bringing together multiple elements to create the big picture that is you. But, if you’re not careful, some beliefs you hold can play a part in destroyin...
Jan 18, 2024•12 min•Ep. 57
Feeling frustrated by the same interactions and experiences with your partner? Perhaps you and your spouse are having the same arguments over and over again, or you’re still not affectionate with each other. How will your life look and feel a year from now, though, if you do nothing different? You might think you know the answer, but you’ll only be partly right. In this episode of The Loving Truth podcast, you’ll learn about two reasons why your life won’t be the same next year if you don’t do t...
Jan 11, 2024•14 min•Ep. 56
If you need to end a relationship, you want to try to do it in the most loving and peaceful way possible. This is something I say often, but there’s one problem with it: not everyone wants to be loving and peaceful about separating. One of my clients, parent coach Julie Zivah, finds herself in a highly contentious divorce with her husband of 22 years. Yet she has found a way to keep her peace while still going through the process. And she wanted to be on the podcast to take us through her journe...
Jan 04, 2024•51 min•Ep. 55
Are you avoiding spending time alone with your partner? Do you feel like you’ve lost momentum on going forward with your divorce decision after talking about it with your spouse? I answered a couple of questions from Tiffany and another caller who found themselves in these situations. In this episode of The Loving Truth podcast, you’ll hear about how you get to a place of disconnection in your marriage and how the way you approach the divorce conversation with your partner can cause you to waver...
Dec 28, 2023•23 min•Ep. 54
So you’ve decided to end your relationship in divorce. What’s the first thing you should do next? The answer might surprise you. In this episode of The Loving Truth podcast, you’ll learn about a much more productive first step you can take instead of the one that most likely immediately comes to mind. I’ll also teach you why it helps you commit to your decision to end your marriage. 1:19 - Your first instinct after you realize divorce is the answer 2:08 - What a wobble list is, and the point of ...
Dec 21, 2023•11 min•Ep. 53
You feel like you’re at the end of your rope when it comes to your marriage. Divorce looks like the inevitable next step...but is it? What if there was another way? What if there was the possibility of still saving your relationship by evolving it into a newer, better version? In this episode of The Loving Truth podcast , you’ll learn about the divorce alternative that many of my clients have used. I’ll teach you the similarity between relationships and technology and reveal how one client has s...
Dec 14, 2023•15 min•Ep. 52
“What other people think of you doesn’t matter.” You can hear that a thousand times. You can even tell it to yourself over and over until you’re blue in the face. And while a select few may not be rattled by it, most of us feel the effects of someone else’s judgment. But you can bounce back instead of letting it affect you for weeks, months, or a lifetime. In this episode of The Loving Truth podcast, you’ll learn three ways of thinking about this that’ll help soften and shorten the blow to just ...
Dec 07, 2023•14 min•Ep. 51
Want to move forward with decisions in your life and marriage? That’s what my monthly Q&As are designed to help you do! And today, it’s time to answer questions from three more listeners for November. Sherry is on the verge of going to a divorce lawyer and is afraid. Amanda has a stressful situation that has caused her husband to separate from her and use her as an emotional punching bag. And Tamara has a husband seeking affirmation that she feels she can’t give him. In this episode of The L...
Nov 30, 2023•31 min•Ep. 50
Do you trust your partner? Even when we say no, we often don’t consider exactly what it is we don’t trust about them. This goes beyond cheating, by the way, which is what most people automatically think of when it comes to trust in a marriage. Having a lack of trust anywhere in a relationship creates disappointment, disconnection, and a lack of intimacy with your spouse. What areas of your marriage do you need to reconsider when it comes to trust? And how do you resolve it when you find that the...
Nov 23, 2023•16 min•Ep. 49
You’d think if our society failed at something 40-50% of the time, we’d probably be doing everything we could to solve the problem... Yet, we don’t do that with the institution of marriage, which sees that rate of divorce among first-timers (it’s even worse for second and third marriages). Instead, we assume our partner is the problem; therefore, the solution is just getting out of the relationship. But we still take ourselves with us to the next relationship. What we really need to do is change...
Nov 16, 2023•26 min•Ep. 48
You’ll find stuff that scares the crap out of you as a parent, if you search Google on the impact of divorce on kids. And while it’s not wrong, it’s not the full story either. There’s something missing from statistics that show the effects of parents divorcing on their children. How you and your husband go through the process is really what’s critical to their emotional well-being. In this episode of The Loving Truth podcast, you’ll learn about how the way you go through the divorce process can ...
Nov 09, 2023•26 min•Ep. 47
Do you cringe at the thought of sex with your husband? Do you even recoil from his intimate touch? After helping sooo many women in my work, I can count on one hand the number of women contemplating divorce who still enjoy sex with their spouse. But how do we get from “til death do us part” and the honeymoon night to moving away when he reaches for you for some intimacy? While there are several reasons why you might be avoiding sex with your partner, in this episode of The Loving Truth podcast, ...
Nov 02, 2023•11 min•Ep. 46
Infidelity involving a husband and his wife’s sisters, a hesitation to leave Mr. (Fake) Nice Guy behind, and a curious question about vibrators, oh my! These are the circumstances involved in the relationship questions I answer on today’s show. You’ll hear from Sylvia, Sarah, and Kim in this episode of The Loving Truth podcast. You’ll learn about moving forward after a triple betrayal involving siblings, the fear behind the hesitation to leave even after things seem to have changed for the bette...
Oct 26, 2023•30 min•Ep. 45
Are you trying to remain in your relationship after an affair but fear that it’s going to happen again? Whether it was you who cheated on your partner or vice versa, you need to understand the reasons behind it. Otherwise, the relationship will never heal, the trust will remain eroded, and you might just find yourself back in the same situation. So in this episode of The Loving Truth podcast, you’ll learn about the possible motivating factors behind infidelity. I’ll also reveal how you can best ...
Oct 19, 2023•18 min•Ep. 44
Things were different then. When you first met your spouse, you were looking for a certain something. Now that you’re years (perhaps even decades) into your marriage, that search has evolved into something else. In this episode of The Loving Truth podcast, you’ll learn about how what you’ve sought from your relationship has changed since its beginning. I’ll also teach you why this unfolding process can sometimes lead to looking for something outside of your relationship (in the form of an affair...
Oct 12, 2023•12 min•Ep. 43
In the coaching world, some ideas can seem a little out there. For example, the idea of creating a conscious relationship may feel a little airy fairy to you. I mean, it sounds like a good idea. But what exactly does it mean? What does a more conscious relationship look like, and how do you create one? In this episode of The Loving Truth podcast, you’ll learn what it takes to create a more conscious relationship. I’ll show you what it looks like to be a more conscious partner with examples of ho...
Oct 05, 2023•17 min•Ep. 42
It’s that time again! In this episode of The Loving Truth podcast, I’m doing another Q&A about your greatest relationship challenges. And today, you’ll hear my answers to the following voicemail questions from an anonymous caller and Jennifer: Is it normal to want to know all the details of my husband’s affair in order to process and get over it? Am I wrong to want to leave my husband of 23 years (who I’m still with out of guilt) so I can find love and be happy again someday? In the process,...
Sep 28, 2023•30 min•Ep. 41
Are your conversations with your husband stale, awkward, or practically non-existent these days? Maybe you talk about the same things over and over because it’s “safe,” or you’ve just gotten stuck in a routine. Regardless, you no longer feel as close to him as you used to. So, how do you get back to having normal, interesting discussions after work, on the couch, around the dinner table...or on a date? In this episode of The Loving Truth podcast, you’ll learn why the interest has fizzled out whe...
Sep 21, 2023•17 min•Ep. 40
“We need to talk.” Do those four dreaded words sound familiar? They usually lead to defensive feelings and another argument with your spouse. But you two have been stuck in limbo for a while now. You really need to sit down and have that difficult conversation you may have been putting off about moving forward (or not) in your marriage. So, how do you approach this much-needed conversation without it turning into the same old argument? The key is asking the right questions--for yourself and your...
Sep 14, 2023•34 min•Ep. 39
If you’ve been with someone for a while, you have certain ways you typically engage with one another. While some of these patterns of engagement are helpful and work for you, others can be destructive. Having the same destructive patterns re-occur creates greater disconnection and dysfunction in your relationship. Once you are aware of them, though, you can change them. But how do you become aware of and change a destructive pattern in your marriage? There’s one I see all the time, and it’s trig...
Sep 07, 2023•13 min•Ep. 38
You’ve seen those TV or radio shows with experts taking calls, right? They answer questions from people about their financial issues, parenting problems, and other topics. Today, for the first time, I’m doing my own version of that and taking calls to answer your questions about your greatest relationship challenges. In this episode of The Loving Truth podcast, you’ll learn the answers to the following questions from Betsy, Karen, and Julie: After a betrayal, when can you feel like you’ve asked ...
Aug 31, 2023•26 min•Ep. 37
Marriage is forever...or so you’ve been taught. You can change (or end) other things like jobs and even other relationships, but marriage is “sacred.” And because you’ve been indoctrinated with this, the notion of ending your marriage can carry all kinds of bad feelings--sadness, guilt, feelings of failure, and so on. But what if you accepted the idea that relationships are meant to be im permanent? In this episode of The Loving Truth podcast, we’ll dive a little deeper into this indoctrination ...
Aug 24, 2023•11 min•Ep. 36
You’ve made the decision to divorce your spouse. Perhaps you’ve already had the first difficult conversation about it. But then...you get stuck. You stall and don’t file the papers. This can last for weeks, months, or even years! People tend to think getting a divorce is a straight-lined process. And when they discover it isn’t and go into stall mode, they can beat themselves up over it. It’s not uncommon to get stuck in the divorce process, though, and there are a couple of places that make it ...
Aug 17, 2023•26 min•Ep. 35
“Why isn’t my husband invested in making our marriage feel good? Why is it always on me?” This is something I hear from women all the time! It’s something I’ve asked myself. In this episode, I’ll decipher this very real phenomenon and explore ways you can work to change this dynamic in your own marriage. Be prepared to dive deep… We’re going to consider the very real foundations of society’s unequal expectations for men and women (and what we’re willing to do about it!) If you’re struggling to d...
Aug 10, 2023•33 min•Ep. 34
From the outside, Mary had the perfect life: She was a successful mother, wife, and college professor. But from the inside, Mary felt lonely and disconnected in her marriage. When her affair started, Mary thought, “This is it! This is the answer. I have to leave my husband for this man… because this is what makes me feel alive!” But I say, “Not so fast!” It’s not so simple. (It’s not that easy.) In this episode, we’ll discover the real reason an affair can make you feel alive, why it might not b...
Aug 03, 2023•17 min•Ep. 33
I regularly share Cold Hard Truths with my clients (and on this podcast!) But in this episode, I’m sharing one of THE most important ones you need to know. Even if it’s not something you WANT to know… Even if it’s not something you’ll WELCOME with open arms… Listen in to learn the Cold Hard Truth that’s vital to understand for couples and people in long-term relationships. If you’re struggling to decide whether to stay or go in your marriage and you’re serious about finding that answer, book a T...
Jul 26, 2023•20 min•Ep. 32
