The Imperfects - podcast cover

The Imperfects

Hugh van Cuylenburg, Ryan Shelton & Josh van Cuylenburgtheresilienceproject.com.au
We’re all imperfect. On this podcast, founder of The Resilience Project Hugh van Cuylenburg, his good friend Ryan Shelton, and only one of their brothers, Josh van Cuylenburg, talks to a variety of interesting people who vulnerably share their own struggles and imperfections, or expertly pass on their wisdom on the subject of imperfection. Whether it’s in The Vulnerabilitea House, The Academy of Imperfection, or with our very own psychologist, Dr Emily, The Imperfects are here to find some valuable takeaways we can all apply to our own imperfect lives.

Episodes

Bronte Campbell - Comparison, The Thief of Joy

What if you were one of the best swimmers in the world, but you still couldn’t beat your older sister? That’s what Olympic swimmer Bronte Campbell has been facing for most of her career with her sister, Cate Campbell. In this Vulnerabilitea House, Bronte opens up about being at the top of the professional swimming world, but still living in someone’s shadow. And how comparison stole much of the joy she might have otherwise felt. But she also describes how the perspective provid...

Apr 16, 20231 hr 9 minSeason 5Ep. 10

Some Things We Wish We Knew Earlier

This B-B-B-BONUS episode arrives thanks to Hugh - a man who claims to hate lists. At least he did until he saw a list called “40 Things I Wish I’d Known at 40” (link below). The list of things resonated with Hugh so much, that he sent it to Ryan and Josh and they decided to do an episode about it. This is that episode. It’d be weird if it wasn’t though wouldn’t it? There’s no guest in this one, it’s just Hugh, Ryan and Josh speaking about the thing...

Apr 12, 202335 minSeason 5Ep. 9

Ann Davidman - Should You Have Children?

When Ryan spoke about his ongoing indecision surrounding whether or not he should have children (Episode: To Breed or Not To Breed - link below), it definitely struck a chord with a lot of people who could relate. One of those people was “Parenthood Clarity Mentor” Ann Davidman, who helps people all over the world to answer the question, ‘Should I have children?’ So, as a sort-of-follow-up episode, Ann joins Hugh, Ryan and Josh in the Academy of Imperfection to provide so...

Apr 09, 20231 hr 6 minSeason 5Ep. 8

Dilruk Jayasinha - When Drinking Stopped Being Funny

Dil’s rise from accountant, to one of Australia’s most successful stand-up comedians is incredible. But what might be even incredible…er is how he was able to finally get sober after years of relying on alcohol. In this vulnerable episode, Dil reveals to Hugh, Ryan and Josh what his life was like when his drinking was out of control, and how when he stopped, it forced him to change the way approached his work and his life. To purchase tickets to Dilruk's comedy show "Heart Sto...

Apr 02, 20232 hr 44 minSeason 5Ep. 7

Dr Emily - A Guide To Getting Therapy

Dr Emily is back in the studio with Hugh, Ryan and Josh to deliver a slightly different, but extremely practical episode. You may not be ready to see a therapist, but even the thought of it can be really overwhelming. Where do you start? Who’s the right therapist for you? What even happens once you’re in a therapy session? And which movies or TV shows get it right? Dr Em guides us through all of that, which will hopefully help you in your journey to find the right therapy for you. Wh...

Mar 26, 20231 hr 14 minSeason 5Ep. 6

Ben Crowe (Pt 2) - Now BE Your Inner Fan

This Academy of Imperfection is a Part 2, or… addendum episode… with the phenom that is Ben Crowe! So, if you haven’t heard Part 1, please listen to that one first by following the link below. In this episode, Ben expands on what he said in Part 1 about listening to your inner fan rather than your inner critic. He guides Hugh, Ryan and Josh through some simple exercises where they access positive memories from their past, so they can reframe their belief system, that they&rsq...

Mar 22, 202346 minSeason 5Ep. 5

Ben Crowe (Pt 1) - Meet Your Inner Fan

Ben Crowe is a huge part of our humble Imperfects history. Ben’s first episode with us in 2021 continues to be one of our most listened to episodes, helping many of you, your friends and your family members. Ben is back in the Academy of Imperfection (split over two episodes) to spread even more wisdom that he's accrued from decades of working with elite athletes at Nike and now at MojoCrowe. Ben’s mission is simple yet powerful… be a good human-being first and a great athlete...

Mar 19, 20231 hr 2 minSeason 5Ep. 4

Samuel Johnson - A Life of Vulnerability

Most of us first met actor and writer Samuel Johnson - and his silky voice - when he burst onto our screens over 20 years ago in the iconic show, The Secret Life of Us. Since then Sam’s experienced a lot of good times, but also some of the most challenging times any of us could imagine. In this Vulnerabilitea House, Sam chooses to answer the card, ‘What childhood challenges best prepared you for adulthood?’. And he not only explains to Hugh, Ryan and Josh why he feels so passio...

Mar 12, 202346 minSeason 5Ep. 3

Hugh's Special... Verrry Special

A lil b-b-b-bonus ep to announce some exciting news... Our very own Hugh van Cuylenburg has filmed and released his Resilience Project talk as a Special on Amazon Prime Video! It's called 'Hugh van Cuylenburg: G.E.M' and it's out now. Hugh has been talking to people about Gratitude, Empathy and Mindfulness for a loooooong time, but now it's finally been filmed so everyone can watch it whenever they want. Watch 'Hugh Van Cuylenburg: G.E.M'  now on Prime Video, or listen to it on Audible. For...

Mar 08, 202321 minSeason 5Ep. 2

Chrissie Swan - Honesty

A few years ago, Australian TV and radio legend Chrissie Swan decided to finally be honest with herself. She stopped doing the things she didn’t want to do anymore, and started doing the things that made HER happy. In this inspiring episode, Chrissie tells Hugh, Ryan and Josh how she was able to turn her life around and live as her true self. No more role-playing, just 100% Pure Swan.  For book recommendation 'The 12 Hour Walk' by Collin Obrady, follow this link: http://bit.ly/3KELETB...

Mar 05, 20232 hr 45 minSeason 5Ep. 1

Season 5 Trailer

It’s Season 5 and oooooooooooh baby, are we excited!!! Yes we are. Why? Because everything’s new BUT everything’s also the same! Y’know? Like when your fish and chip shop does a big renovation and you’re really excited because the shop’s all spiffy and new, but you’re also really excited and relieved that they still have potato cakes and dim sims and prawn toast and all the stuff you liked last year. So yeah it’s kinda like that. Sort of. Anyway, h...

Feb 26, 202322 min

Lael Stone - Take Care of Yourself

Okay so quick brag… last year’s episode with parenting expert Lael Stone was 2022’s #1 Most Shared Episode on Apple Podcasts, which you can listen to at the link below. 💁‍♀️ But now, Lael is back for a brand new b-b-b-bonus ep with Hugh, Ryan and Josh to talk all about YOU! Well… you and your kids and your loved ones and some other very shareable things that you might be verrrrrry interested in. As your kids start a new year of school and you start a new year of&he...

Feb 02, 20231 hr 14 minSeason 4Ep. 48

How (and Why) Ryan Dumped His iPhone

Ryan loves his smart phone. Or at least, he used to. Recently, he became fed up with it ruling his life. Endless scrolling, lost time, and just general bleh. So, three months ago he traded in his beloved iPhone for a not-so-smart flip phone - which he affectionately refers to as his ‘SmugPhone’. In this b-b-b-bonus episode, Ryan talks Hugh and Josh through every aspect of his smug journey so far: - Why he gave up his iPhone - How it’s going - pros and cons - What’s his ac...

Jan 15, 20231 hr 2 minSeason 4Ep. 47

Santa Claus - A Special Vulnerabilitea House

Well… it doesn’t get more exclusive than this! During the busiest time of his year, Santa Claus has been kind enough to join Hugh, Ryan and Josh in the Imperfects studio, so he can enter The Vulnerabilitea House. Despite some issues with parking his sleigh and some disruptive reindeers during the recording of this episode, Santa still manages to answer all three of the cards he pulls from the Vulnerabilitea House deck. It’s safe to say that this is not our normal type of Imper...

Dec 18, 202229 minSeason 4Ep. 46

Hugh van Cuylenburg - Ageing, and Other Reflections

In this third of three b-b-b-bonus episodes, Hugh enters the Vulnerabilitea House and answers the question, ‘What do you see when you look in the mirror?’ For the first time in Hugh’s life, he doesn't see a young man reflected back at him, and he generously tells Ryan and Josh how this is effecting him. How do we feel when we realise we’re not “young” anymore? It really is the age-old question isn’t it? P.S. Keep an eye out for a very special Christmas e...

Dec 11, 202236 minSeason 4Ep. 45

Josh van Cuylenburg - How to Defeat Envy

In yet another b-b-b-bonus episode, it’s Josh’s turn to draw from the deck Vulnerabilitea House cards. And in doing so he shares his struggle with envy and jealousy amongst his successful friends, but also how it’s changed for him in recent years. And why.   See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Dec 04, 202242 minSeason 4Ep. 44

Esther Perel - Let's Be Better Lovers

If there’s such thing as a b-b-b-bonus B-B-B-BONUS ep, this is it. Psychotherapist Esther Perel is THE woman to turn to for relationship advice - IYKYK! Her two TED talks have been viewed over sixty million times, she’s written two books that have both been featured on the New York Times Bestseller list, and her intimate podcasts with real people in real counselling sessions have positively changed the relationships of millions of couples - including ours. In this Academy of Imperfec...

Nov 30, 202255 minSeason 4Ep. 43

Ryan Shelton - To breed, or not to breed

Teeeeechnically the season is over… but who cares about rules when you’ve got three hosts who eat rules for breakfast! Hugh, Ryan and Josh have decided to add three B-B-B-BONUS Vulnerabilitea House episodes to the end of the season! To kick things off, Ryan answers the question: What parts of ageing scare you most? Ryan goes on to share something big that’s been on his mind recently - whether or not he should have children - and his fear around making a decision that he may re...

Nov 27, 202243 minSeason 4Ep. 42

Nedd Brockmann - The Man, The Myth, The Neddgend

If you look up ‘Nedd Brockmann’ in the dictionary you won’t find anything because it’s a proper noun. But if you google ‘Nedd Brockmann’, you’ll see the true meaning of ‘legendary’. For 46 days in 2022, Nedd ran 100km a day from Cottesloe Beach to Bondi Beach, literally RUNNING ACROSS THE ENTIRE COUNTRY. Why? That’s the best part. Nedd (23!) not only wanted to raise $1m for homelessness (it’s currently at $2.5m - link below to don...

Nov 20, 20222 hr 36 minSeason 4Ep. 41

Dr Emily - Lonely? You're Not Alone

Dr Emily is back with Hugh, Ryan and Josh for the final Emisode of the year, and she’s chosen to talk about something we can all relate to in one way or another… loneliness. In reflecting on last year’s raw episode with Christian O’Connell (link below), Dr Emily deep-dives into the many facets of loneliness. - Why do we feel lonely? - How do we handle our own loneliness? - What can we do to help others who feel lonely? The holiday season is approaching, which for some of...

Nov 13, 20221 hr 6 minSeason 4Ep. 40

A DARN GOSH BIG ANNOUNCEMENT

We’re doing it. Well… there’s no turning back now. Hugh, Ryan and Josh are going live on tour around the country with a stage show that they promise will be some of the most imperfect shows they’ve ever done. Live. Uncut. 100% guaranteed imperfection! The Imperfects… LIVE ON STAGE in 2023 Special pre-sale tickets available from November 11-14 2022 Tickets available from livenation.com.au   See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information....

Nov 10, 202215 minSeason 4Ep. 39

Kate Reid (Pt 2) - The Life-Saving Croissant

If you haven't heard Part 1 of our chat with Lune founder and master-baker, Kate Reid, we recommend you do that first. Because this episode, the sequel in our Croissantology, continues Kate's miraculous story as she attempts to overcome an eating disorder that forced her to leave her dream career in Formula 1. Here, Kate explains how she did that by going all in on creating the "perfect" croissant. And how that croissant launched a new pastry obsession for Melbournians, which eventually led to t...

Nov 06, 20222 hr 42 minSeason 4Ep. 38

Kate Reid (Pt 1) - The Impossibility of Perfection

Lune is highly regarded as the most respected patisserie in Australia. The New York Times even called the Lune croissant the best in the world. And the woman behind it all is Kate Reid, a former Aerospace Engineer at the Williams F1 Team in the UK. Kate’s story has to be heard to be believed. It’s so epic, we had to break it into 2 parts. In Part 1, Kate talks about her time at Williams, and generously shares her struggles with anorexia, which eventually forced her to end her F1 drea...

Oct 30, 20221 hr 8 minSeason 4Ep. 37

Oliver Burkeman - The JOY of Missing Out

4000 weeks. Like it or not, that’s (approximately) the average length of a human life. And while we intend to use that time wisely, and do all the things we care about, we often find ourselves doing the opposite. In this episode, UK author Oliver Burkeman tells us how to focus on the things that REALLY matter, rather than filling our time with the not-so-important things. Pulling from his best-selling (and incredible) book, Four Thousand Weeks: Time Management For Mortals, Oliver is this w...

Oct 23, 20221 hr 8 minSeason 4Ep. 36

Linda Marigliano - Strict Parents & Being a ‘Good Girl’

As a DJ, TV presenter, award-winning podcaster and Triple J royalty, Linda Marigliano has had a big career and spoken to some of the biggest artists of all time. And now she joins Hugh, Ryan and Josh in The Vulnerabilitea House. Linda talks about her life growing up as the child of an Italian father and Chinese mother, and explains about how the criticism she received from her mother made her feel about herself - both then and now. Oh, and there’s some very practical advice on nose-hair tr...

Oct 16, 20221 hr 5 minSeason 4Ep. 35

Dr Kiran Martin - Truth, Leadership & Gratitude

After listening to this Academy of Imperfection, you’ll no doubt be heartily agreeing with Hugh, who introduces Dr Kiran Martin as the most impressive person he’s ever met. Over 30 years after jumping the fence to get inside a slum in Delhi so she could help treat the people in need, Dr Kiran now runs ASHA, an organisation she created that has helped over 900,000 people in over 100 slums across India. And counting! This is the story behind ASHA. And well… it’s incredible...

Oct 09, 20221 hr 20 minSeason 4Ep. 34

Dr Emily - Rejection Sensitivity

None of us like to feel rejected. Whether it be at work, with friends, or on a date. In this Dr Emisode, Dr Emily - our very own psychologist - tells Hugh, Ryan and Josh why some of us have a sensitivity to rejection. She explains what we can do about it, and how we can act compassionately towards others, and avoid making them feel unnecessarily rejected as well.   For research article, 'Recognising Emotion In Faces: Developmental Effects of Child Abuse and Neglect', by Seth Pollak, follow ...

Oct 02, 20221 hr 5 minSeason 4Ep. 33

Hamish McLachlan - A World Turned Upside Down

While many of us may think of Channel 7’s Hamish McLachlan as the voice of sport in Australia, Hamish is very quick to point to Bruce McAvaney instead. As it turns out, we all love Bruce McAvaney A LOT and apologetically talk about him for quite a while - including a few wonderful Bruce stories from Hamish. When we finally get to the Vulnerabilitea House card selection, Hamish answers the question, ‘When did your life get turned upside down and how did things change?’. This pro...

Sep 25, 20221 hr 12 minSeason 4Ep. 32

Nazeem Hussain - Losing a Parent

Stand-up comedian Nazeem Hussain lost his father to COVID-19 in 2021. In this episode, Nazeem shares the difficulties surrounding his family’s loss, and how his Dad’s life and sudden death has impacted his own life. But Nazeem also tells some wildly funny stories - in particular one about a "comedy concert" he did in Sri Lanka in front of The Prime Minister, which turned out to be organised by none other than his Dad. You probably already know Naz from his many, MANY appearances on t...

Sep 18, 20222 hr 30 minSeason 4Ep. 31

Johann Hari (Pt 2) - Why Do We Do What We Do?

In Part 2 of this Academy of Imperfection, author and profanity purveyor, Johann Hari answers more of your brilliant questions. As a result, Johann talks with Hugh, Ryan and Josh about intrinsic and extrinsic values, and how they affect the things we do and social media’s role in why we do them. Also (speaking of click-bait), in an Imperfects exclusive, Johann reveals his go-to KFC order. And double-also, we recorded this episode before the passing of Queen Elizabeth II, which will make mo...

Sep 14, 202254 minSeason 4Ep. 30