The Imperfects - podcast cover

The Imperfects

Hugh van Cuylenburg, Ryan Shelton & Josh van Cuylenburgtheresilienceproject.com.au
We’re all imperfect. On this podcast, founder of The Resilience Project Hugh van Cuylenburg, his good friend Ryan Shelton, and only one of their brothers, Josh van Cuylenburg, talks to a variety of interesting people who vulnerably share their own struggles and imperfections, or expertly pass on their wisdom on the subject of imperfection. Whether it’s in The Vulnerabilitea House, The Academy of Imperfection, or with our very own psychologist, Dr Emily, The Imperfects are here to find some valuable takeaways we can all apply to our own imperfect lives.

Episodes

Dr Louise Newson - It's Hormones. Period.

It’s that time of the month (sorry), and we’re welcoming back Dr Louise Newson to talk all things hormones. In case you missed it, last time we had Dr Louise on the pod, she shared her expertise on perimenopause and menopause. This, to no surprise, was Apple Australia's most shared podcast episode in 2024. Today, Dr Louise talks to the guys about hormones; what they are, how they impact our lives, and what the difference is between the natural and synthetic forms we can be prescribed...

May 25, 20251 hr 38 minSeason 7Ep. 21

Dr Emily - How To Get UNSTUCK

Quick! Is anyone here an author? Yes! And her book is finally here! Our favourite psychologist, Dr Emily Musgrove, has published the most anticipated book of the year,  Unstuck: A guide to finding your way forward to the life you want to live. Feeling stuck, and the yearning for something to change, is a human experience. And in Unstuck , Dr Emily doesn’t just acknowledge this feeling, she walks with you through it. We’re talking values, we’re talking an introduction to ac...

May 22, 202528 minSeason 7Ep. 20

Monty Dimond - Sick & Tired of Being Sick & Tired

It’s a Monty type of day - and thank god, because this week we welcome the brilliant Monty Dimond into the studio. In this episode, Monty opens up about the heartbreak of losing her mum—her person, her sense of home and safety. She speaks candidly about the tunnel vision of ambition, living with imposter syndrome, and how a debilitating chronic illness left her bed-bound for 90% of last year. Hugh and Monty share an incredibly vulnerable chat about parenting neurodivergent children; ...

May 18, 20251 hr 38 minSeason 7Ep. 19

Dr Emily - Grief Lightening

What would it look like if we were more open to grief? This week, as promised, we are joined by our resident psychologist Dr Emily Musgrove to talk through grief from a clinical perspective. Grief is proof of life, and proof of love. And while it is an incredibly unique experience for each person, there is a universality to it as well. Dr Em walks us through how grief impacts the brain on a neurological level, and unpacks its unpredictable, non-linear path.  Explaining the difference betwee...

May 11, 20251 hr 26 minSeason 7Ep. 18

Lauren Zonfrillo - Grief: The Shittest Greatest Gift

Lauren Zonfrillo knows grief - intimately, devastatingly, and meaningfully. Almost two years since the sudden death of her husband Jock, Lauren describes grief as the ‘shittest, greatest gift’, and how she navigated unimaginable loss while continuing to parent two young children. In this episode, Lauren shares what she learnt about herself in the days, weeks, and months since Jock’s passing. Discussing with Hugh, Ryan and Josh about her evolving relationship with spirituality, ...

May 04, 20251 hr 25 minSeason 7Ep. 17

Hugh’s ADHD…brief (Bonus From Patreon)

It’s the episode we’ve all been waiting for – a peek inside Hugh’s brain. After our episode with psychologist and ADHD expert Janelle Booker - and a reboot of his algorithm that Hugh related to on a spiritual level - Hugh began to wonder whether his time-blindness, reject sensitivity and inability to focus on things he wasn’t interested in, could be explained by ADHD. Turns out, yeah. Hugh pretty much definitely has ADHD. Exploring Hugh’s lived experience, Rya...

Apr 27, 202555 minSeason 7Ep. 16

Simon Hill - Eating Imperfectly vs Perfectly Eating

Chasing the ‘perfect’ diet is a trap; which is  really  great news for our brand. Simon Hill, nutritionist, physiotherapist, and host of  The Proof  podcast, joins us in the Academy of Imperfection to break down whether the latest dietary trends on social media actually match up with nutrition science. In this episode, Simon unpacks the role of both genetics and lifestyle choices in shaping our health, and specifically our risk of disease. Acknowledging the pressu...

Apr 20, 20251 hr 35 minSeason 7Ep. 15

Courtney Ugle - Intergenerational Strength

Trauma ran through Courtney Ugle’s family - until it ran into her. CEO and founder of Waangkiny, as well as a football superstar, Courtney is on a mission to transform her adversity into resilience, power, and love. In our Vulnerabilitea House, Courtney answers the question, “what childhood challenges best prepared you for adulthood?”, diving into how she copes with the loss of her greatest source of unconditional love and support, and how this drives the work that she does tod...

Apr 13, 20251 hr 16 minSeason 7Ep. 14

Dr Emily - How to Be Leaned On

Chances are, you’ve supported someone going through a tough time. And while the meaning sustains the sacrifice, today we want to support you ….. supporting them. A bit of support inception, if you will. To guide us through this incredibly complex and meaningful topic is our resident psychologist, Dr Emily Musgrove. Navigating relationships requires awareness. Showing up as a partner, friend, parent, or sibling while holding space for pain – without being overwhelmed – is...

Apr 06, 20251 hr 23 minSeason 7Ep. 13

Danielle Laidley PART 2 - Her Public Outing

This is PART TWO of our chat with footballer, coach and uniter of people, Danielle Laidley. We HIGHLY recommend you go back and listen to part one if you haven’t heard it (linked below). In this episode, Danielle recounts how it felt to be publicly outed, her own voice removed as the media crafted their own narrative about her identity. A story of courage, resilience and love, Danielle vulnerably shares with Hugh, Ryan and Josh how she united her two worlds, and found the strength to live ...

Mar 30, 202548 minSeason 7Ep. 12

Danielle Laidley PART 1 - Her Private Struggle

Danielle May Laidley was known by a different name for the first 53 years of her life. We are so proud that this episode is a contributing factor to her reclaiming her narrative as a transgender woman. An extremely talented AFL footballer, Danielle would go on to become a highly respected coach, always keeping within arm’s reach the version of herself which felt most authentic. Danielle’s story, in its entirety, is so incredibly important that we had to split it over two big and spec...

Mar 30, 20251 hr 5 minSeason 7Ep. 11

Let’s Talk About Hugh’s Open Letter

It’s been a big few weeks since Hugh released his Open Letter to Parents of Neurodivergent People (episode linked below). If you haven't heard it, it’s best to listen to that before you listen to this episode. Today we wanted to catch up and reflect on whats happened since. Hugh shares some beautiful messages, and Josh asks, practically, how we can show less judgement and more empathy to neurodivergent people and the people who care for them. Then, Ryan does some quick maths to fact ...

Mar 27, 202543 minSeason 7Ep. 10

Stephen Curry - I Dug a Hole… and Found Myself

Get excited, it’s finally Steve Curry* day. Actor, comedian, and expert hole digger (you bet we snuck this in here), Steve joins us to share his personal and professional epiphany: a ‘collaboration realisation’ his lightbulb moment about teamwork, success, and the power of vulnerability. In our Vulnerabilitea House, Steve answers the questions ‘When was a time you genuinely needed help? Were you able to ask for it?’, and discusses the joy of working in a team where ...

Mar 23, 20251 hr 10 minSeason 7Ep. 9

Dr Julie Smith - Building Confidence, Brick by Brick

Clinical psychologist Dr Julie Smith has a gift for explaining complex ideas in under a minute (which is GREAT for new-age attention spans). With over 4.8 million TikTok followers, two best-selling books and a glowing endorsement from our own Dr Em, having Dr Julie join our Academy of Imperfection is nothing short of a dream. In this episode, Dr Julie reframes the feeling of overwhelm, helping us to see it as valuable information about how we might not be meeting our needs, rather than something...

Mar 16, 20251 hr 9 minSeason 7Ep. 8

Hugh's Open Letter to Parents of Neurodivergent People

This is an open letter to parents of autistic and neurodivergent people. It may be confronting. Please take care when listening. Love, Hugh See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Mar 13, 202515 minSeason 7Ep. 7

Hannah Diviney - Disabled in an Able-Bodied World

Hannah Diviney is one of the most powerful people in pop culture. At just 25 years old, the author, advocate, and actor hasn’t just called out Lizzo for using an ableist slur—she also took on Queen B herself. And she succeeded on both fronts. Which, once you get to know her, isn’t surprising at all. In our Vulnerabilitea House, Hannah reflects on the questions: “How do you see yourself? Is it the same way your loved ones see you?” Answering with incredible...

Mar 09, 20251 hr 35 minSeason 7Ep. 6

Dr Emily - Hope

Today, Dr Emily talks about hope. And in a world where things can feel a little bit hopeless, this really couldn’t have come at a better time. In contrast to all of our understanding up until this point, hope is not an emotion. Expertly defined by Dr Emily, hope is a belief. And most significantly, it can be learned, and it can be cultivated. Psychological mic-drop. This episode delves into strategies for creating both a sense of collective and individual hope, and in a discovery which hap...

Mar 02, 20251 hr 16 minSeason 7Ep. 5

Matthew Murphy - A Sober Wombat

Matthew Murphy, front-man of the iconic UK band The Wombats, joins us in our first VulnerabiliTea House of 2025. In this episode, Murph answers one of life’s most terrifying questions, “In what ways do you fear you could negatively impact your children?” He also shares his experience with panic attacks, anxiety and depression and is extremely honest detailing how alcohol became a crutch. Becoming sober, which Murph describes as the best decision of his life, was not easy. ...

Feb 23, 202553 minSeason 7Ep. 4

Get Ready. We’re Touring A Brand New Live Show!

It’s time for Announcement Number Three! A brand-new Imperfects Live Show (!!!!!!). That’s right, we’re going on the road again. In October, November, and December of this year (2025), we’ll be performing a brand-new stage show, around the country! It’s gonna be bigger, it’s gonna be better, and we promise we won’t let Hugh (or Chat GPT) write the show. All responsibility will henceforth be given to Random Word Generator! We would love and adore to ...

Feb 20, 202516 minSeason 7Ep. 3

Maria Ruberto - Sleep Your Way To Your Top

Psychologist Maria Ruberto is back to talk about one of the most important parts of our day: sleep. Starting off with the biology of sleep, Maria takes us through how we get to sleep, what happens when we sleep, and why we desperately need to sleep for good health and longevity. With metaphors galore to make the science as relatable as possible, we discuss the role of melatonin, the impact of screens on our suprachiasmatic nucleus and whether it’s worth cutting your sleep short to exercise...

Feb 16, 20251 hr 53 minSeason 7Ep. 2

Mick Fanning - Riding The Waves of Loss

The stoke level is pretty high this week because we are joined by three-time world champion surfer, shark attack survivor, and maybe the nicest guy we have ever met, Mick Fanning. We had high expectations for this chat (we mean, it’s Mick Fanning), but he absolutely blew us out of the water with his humanity, compassion, empathy, and positivity in the face of incredible tragedy. Mick, we’ll definitely take you up on that offer of a surf (and lifelong friendship). To watch this f...

Feb 09, 20251 hr 40 minSeason 7Ep. 1

We're Back! And A Little More Imperfect

Well, well, well. We’re (officially) back for 2025, baby! On Hugh’s agenda for today’s episode: nugatory chat, ghosts, general excitement for the new season and we also reveal THE SECOND BIG ANNOUNCEMENT! That’s right, The Imperfects are bringing you a new show. A Little More Imperfects, which can be found on Patreon, is bonus fortnightly episodes featuring everything that you know and love (Josh going deep, Ryan being hilarious and Hugh giving life changing advice /...

Feb 02, 202528 min

James van Cuylenburg - What’s Your Relationship Status?

It’s our last episode of Summer School, and today we welcome back clinical psychologist (and “clinical cousin” of Hugh and Josh), James van Cuylenburg. In this episode, James tells us EVERYTHING we need to know about our relationships… well almost everything…there’s a lot to cover. From attachment styles, to breaking trust, to learning how to own your feelings and navigating coupledom through life’s changing seasons. Getting into the nitty gritty, Hugh...

Jan 26, 20251 hr 35 minSeason 6Ep. 65

Imperfect Birth Stories with Sophie Walker

In this episode of our Summer School, we are joined by Sophie Walker, creator, and host of Australian Birth Stories. With over 17 million downloads, and 500 episodes, Australian Birth Stories podcast has been accredited by the Australian College of Midwives and has been instrumental in educating and empowering both people who are giving birth, as well as birthing partners. Hugh shares the incredible trauma and fear involved with his first experience of birth, and how tools of education and empow...

Jan 19, 20251 hr 2 minSeason 6Ep. 64

Surprise! You’re Writing A Book!

B b b bonus episode! We proudly present to you  My Imperfect Life: a novel journal written by you. That’s right, we’re releasing a book, but making you do all the work. With 100 questions inspired by episodes from 2024 on The Imperfects,  My Imperfect Life is an introduction to vulnerability, allowing you to unpack your own imperfect life and be more vulnerable with yourself (because we know vulnerability with others can be A LOT). To celebrate the launch of  My Imperf...

Jan 16, 202534 minSeason 6Ep. 63

Bronnie Ware - What Are Your Future Regrets?

There will come a time for all of us (unless we REALLY make some improvements with bio-hacking) where we are faced with our own mortality. Who is at your hypothetical bedside? Are you happy with how you’ve lived? Do you have any regrets? In this Summer School edition of the Academy of Imperfection, we are joined by Bronnie Ware. Bronnie found herself in palliative care, caring for, and listening to, the dying. And boy, are we glad she did. Bronnie collated, and published, the Top 5 Regrets...

Jan 12, 20251 hr 3 minSeason 6Ep. 62

Little Boy Christmas - The Forgotten Son of Mr & Mrs Claus

Quick heads up: Little Boy Christmas has a tenuous relationship with his parents, and therefore, this episode isn’t suited for kids. Have you ever wondered about Little Boy Christmas, the forgotten son of Santa and Mrs Claus? Nope, neither had we. That’s probably why he’s forgotten. Looking like an unbelievably shredded Dickensian orphan (you’re going to want to watch the YouTube for this one), Little Boy Christmas chats to Hugh, Ryan and Josh about the physical and psych...

Dec 22, 202428 minSeason 6Ep. 61

Michael Theo - Life on the Spectrum

You may know Michael from Love on the Spectrum, or his podcast Mr A+, or even his appearance on Ellen – he’s done it all and has gained an incredible amount of wisdom on his journey so far. We’ve been doing this show for six years, and no-one has ever summarised it as well as Michael Theo: trying to be perfect is a wild goose chase. In this episode, Hugh, Ryan and Josh chat to Michael about how he found his voice after growing up as a non-verbal kid, and instils on the guys som...

Dec 15, 20241 hr 4 minSeason 6Ep. 60

Layne Beachley - Surf’s Up… And Down

Today we welcome into the studio 7 time world champion surfer, and all-round legend, Layne Beachley. Layne, who had the self-described ‘compassion of a tiger shark’ during her competition days, has lived an incredible journey to learn how to love others, and more importantly, herself. Upon discovering that she was adopted, Layne internalised a fear of rejection and intense need to prove herself. What’s one way to prove yourself, you may ask? Becoming a world champion, no matter...

Dec 08, 20241 hr 28 minSeason 6Ep. 59

Johann Hari - Beware The Thrill of The Magic Pill

Johann Hari is a prolific author, deep thinker, and seasoned guest of The Imperfects. In this episode, Johann takes the guys on a deep dive into the Western food system, and how processed food has completely derailed our nutritional wisdom. Our relationship with food is a very personal one, and Johann and Josh get vulnerable about how they have used food to manage emotions. They discuss how vanity comes into play, the plethora of risks and benefits to the new weight-loss drug like Ozempic, and i...

Dec 01, 20241 hr 26 minSeason 6Ep. 58
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