Celebrating the Holiday Chaos with Forever Reckless

I've never seen Die Hard either .

I haven't seen it in probably 15 years , but I haven't seen , like most movies in a while . I watch that every fucking Christmas I watch it , like me too .

I watch it maybe five times a year .

Die Hard . That seems like a lot . That's a good movie .

How do ?

you have so much time where you watch Die Hard , you stay up , you're regretted , so good Can you hear yourself .

I can .

Okay , cool . Why'd you change voices as soon as you got on the mic ? Did anyone else ?

know that she does that . It's called code switching .

Hey , how'd I sound ? Did I sound ? Great , it's a slow motion signal .

We changed to Wednesday . Oh , is it .

Yeah , get with the program .

Because I mean .

I would just Fake ass fan .

My balls fake . Usually I have a great old reaction .

So on the beat , sir .

Oh , hello everyone , and welcome to the funky panther Coming to you from Fort Worth , texas . We have got a decent episode for you here , with Forever Reckless Hanging out with us on our first episode here , on episode 159 . So say , hi y'all , hi y'all .

Let's get into it . Let's get into it . Sorry , start over , you messed it up .

You didn't say , let's get into it .

Sit back , relax and enjoy . Let's get into it . I'm Chad .

I'm Javier , I'm Tim .

We are the Funky Panther , my brain kind of just yeah , it looked like you malfunctioned . Does it have to go in order for you ?

to get it right .

You're like ee , ee , ee . It's like if you go home . Get into it when you're coming home from school .

Canceled .

No , no , it was a program malfunction is what I was doing .

Do you remember , whenever you come home from school , your mom would like paint the house or something , what ? Or paint the inside the house or rearrange the furniture and you would flip shit because it was different .

Yeah , yeah , yeah , no , that's called autism .

We've already talked about this in the first 30 . Yeah , so you not doing that is like the equivalent of that , yours .

Sorry , javier , I didn't mean to fuck up your brain . That was my mistake .

I understood , but I do that . I wasn't the next one to have to say anything .

Well , Javier does that too whenever I say I'm Chaddy and I'm hungry , and you say I'm Tim , I'm like okay , that's not right . I understand , I feel like that just doesn't feel right .

Every soda . I see Javier just gets up the whole time . You bring a bottle , he says Tim .

Yeah , when we have podcasts , it's really me and Tim talking , Javier thrown in some quips you know what I mean and making himself drinks the whole time .

That's what the ?

fucking banter has turned into yeah .

I'll take one .

So , ladies , yeah , I'm already done with my LaCroix too . I thought I was going to sip on this the whole time , but I'm a fool , I'm a fool . So we caught up on the first 30 . If you missed it on YouTube , go and check it out .

You're talking about shit , about our two month hiatus .

No .

Sometimes I think we took it two months .

What that is is straight fucking jealousy . What I'm saying is jealousy .

The problem is , if we took two months and we would have no listeners .

Yeah , we barely take a day and we have no listeners . You know what I mean ? No , we had consistent downloads still .

That's good , do you ?

want me to help you .

Which one you want .

I'm here struggling tonight . I was like what the fuck's going on . I was like what's another fucking episode coming out ? Like I was getting restless .

He messaged me because we originally said like the end of October and he was like I thought you guys were coming back and I was like , yeah , no , we didn't even discuss like post-party , or we just would like talk about it , like talk to each other and never bring up the podcast , and then eventually we're like huh , well , I guess we should probably go back

So when I'm working I have to listen to podcasts . And so it'd be y'all , or it'd be like RAP or TFTI , or you got to name them all now .

You started , you got to name them all now . Don't leave anyone out . They're going to get left . They're going to feel real bad about it . Who else do you listen to ? Yeah , who else do you listen to on a regular basis ?

Sam's podcast Phil podcast whatever they were doing to check cafe ? Okay , whenever , who else ?

I know you've missed a few . I'm making a lot of roots .

Forever roots used to be like forever roots or a root .

So like I get annoyed whenever he doesn't put it in a new episode .

So like I was really annoyed when y'all weren't putting episodes out , because I'm like what the fuck am I going to listen to ?

now , if the other person went back to the top here , I really don't care .

We made him start naming .

He started a list and made him continue .

I think you broke my kidney hurts right now .

I love fast food like Taco Bell , taco Bueno , what else , what else ? My brain hurts , let's see .

The group chat . Nine month cruise is going to be my 20 , 24 year channel on Tik Tok .

Yes . All right so tell me about this .

Yeah , yeah , you were talking about this nine month cruise . So what is this ?

It's the Royal Caribbean world cruise . You get on there for nine months and they basically take you everywhere . You can do it in segments , like you can only do like the first three months , or you can come on like later in the trip .

Does that include ? Does it include , drinks ?

I want to know like If I'm paying 60 grand it better fucking include drinks , I'm sure it does .

Better couple the fucking hand job every day .

It's like one of those , like packages you have to choose .

Like there was different , like tears in it .

Like this tier was like 60 K , I think that just like included like your food maybe , if I can like you had to go up if I could go on a hiatus , right , like if I could shut off my bills , like if I could pay it .

Pay everything off Right .

Yeah .

Shut all the stuff down here at the house , not having to pay any bills , quit my job quit my job . Not even quit my job , but like if I could go on like a sabbatical or whatever . I would do that .

Yeah .

Nine months . Yeah , lease your house out , and then I won't even lease it .

I don't want people in here .

I would sell it .

Think about it . Sell it , make the profit . Quit your job . I'll lease it .

Honestly , if I did that right now , I would have sex in all rooms .

Being on a cruise for nine months sounds terrible to me . But not having to think about anything for nine months , I tell you what I would sleep so much .

Yeah .

Because it's just so comfortable to sleep , you would sleep so much . Yeah , because the cruise ships , like you're on the water and just like that movement . It's just I slept so much when we went on a cruise .

I think it's a few months ago . I'd get sick of it though , like of the motion , because , like when you get like land legs , like when you get off , I'm like sea legs , but I think they stop . Which one is it ?

When you get them land sea legs we like the land legs . When you get off , I don't know what you're talking about you guys ? Don't know you get your sea legs , like whenever you're on the ship , and you can actually walk and you're fine , tim , I think you pronounce semen legs yeah .

It's a new semen on your legs . Yes , Like when you get off of the boat and then you feel like you're still moving on land .

Have you seen like the things like that ? Like , have you ever seen like whenever astronauts have been like at the space station for a long time and they get back on earth and then they like well , throw stuff just thinking it's going to float ?

because they've so used .

I imagine it's kind of like that you know to an extent like you would get off on the off the boat and try to walk around .

You're just like it would depend on the room too , because some of the like cabins that you can get are really , really small .

Oh , like the one we stayed in was like oh yeah , and the Carnival Cruise .

How many ?

people are going to get murdered on this .

Well , so murder is one thing and also from the chat how many times did you get COVID and food poisoning on a cruise for nine months ? Probably a bunch .

Yeah , so land legs are a real thing . Thank you .

This somebody on TikTok was talking about , like how this is like another season of white lotus , like white lotus , but yeah , a lot of people are going .

Yeah , you could totally do it . I know you talked about on your podcast , but I also saw the same thing of the guy that bought or renting or something like that . He's going to work on the cruise ship for like two or three years or something like that is the least and it's just paid for like he's good . He's going to work on a cruise ship .

No , I agree because I had . There was a lady that I met on one and she lived on a cruise ship Like she would get on like anyone every month and she only paid . I want to say it was under like it was under $6,000 for the whole month .

Well , because we know a couple that just came back from a month on a cruise and they were only back for the holidays and they're going to go back on another like month long cruise . You can cruise cheap .

Yeah because a whole week at a $100 a day or less .

Generally that's to be about $27,000 . Not 60 .

That has to be like a great room .

I used to be a big cruiser actually .

Like a fucking carnival A suite .

A suite with a great balcony Carnival is ghetto . Everyone on , there is doing the same thing .

Oh , okay , so it's a specific .

So the whole cruise Same rooms .

Same people , oh God , same people . That's kind of like creepy .

It's like you're like a nude Dude . That's going to be like you talk about like a swing .

Imagine the people going to get cheated on on them .

That's open , that's open relationship . So , whatever you and I Chad went on that cruise . And we cheer each other .

We were both single .

Yeah , we were both single and we were able to like remember whenever I was freaking out about swimming .

Huh , what , no ? Keep telling the story . No , no , no . Give me timelines too . It's a lot of fun

Yeah , we didn't really . I slept more than Chad did , but we would walk around . Chad was up . He was like yeah , sir , you're doing great back there .

What is it like ?

Whoa , I can't remember what's happening Maybe someone in the check .

It helps out , but like , was it like 15 to 20 days underway ?

Father Frank , clean it Sorry .

When you have the outbreak of gonorrhea or something like that Probably .

Where did this go , but ?

I feel like they're like it's a lake , who has gonorrhea ?

Again , you and the mustache making up weird segments that don't need to be in this conversation . We were talking about gonorrhea , weren't we ?

I'm just saying like good times on cruises , gonorrhea I just figured that Javier got real worried at some point .

Oh , no , no , I didn't get worried .

No , so when we last time I went to Cosmow , which I get to go in a month , which is great , but last time we went Javier .

I'm so stoked .

So , javier , we went snorkeling and that was the first time you'd ever been snorkeling , yeah , yeah . So we went snorkeling . The boat dropped us off , didn't tell us they were leaving , so they just took off and so we were like head down underwater looking at the corals and fish .

They don't immediately go for shore . Long story short . I was swimming towards boats . I'm like I need help , yeah .

They thought he was this crazy person . So get in a life saver . This is the person .

This is the person . If I saw him lost at sea I would not help him .

But the funny thing is I had met a girl that I was supposed to meet up with that night and my I was pedaling , pedaling so much my shoulder fucking muscles were fucked . I was like I was hurting so bad I can't meet her the next day .

And another excursion .

And then when the next day I saw in the boat another dude was like fuck , fuck Cause , that was my chance to like have sex on the ship . What Hang on ?

I got a . I gave you a couple of I got a sound for that . She's like damn what's happening .

And he's like I was lost at sea . I almost died . Pirates came and got me and she's like well , I'm fucking somebody else . You were gone for two hours .

Yeah , and I thought you were just the guy that made the tortillas .

The turnaround time for Danny on a cruise ship is quick , though Is it . I went when I was like 18 or 19 and I had a time . Did I have a time ?

Oh my God , we were . We were at the back of the ship and his parents just enjoying the sights . We just hear smacking behind us .

It was like a bunch of 13 year old , yeah , like dozens of teenagers that are all just making out and we're like what the fuck is going on and we got the fuck out of there .

I've never been single on a cruise ship , so I don't know how that is .

I did just pull it one point though , cause a couple got kicked out for fucking in the hot tub . They caught them and they kicked them off the boat . We had to like stop at a random location ?

Did yours have an adults only section ?

Yes .

Is it yeah ?

No , it's not a lot of it , just because it's a total only doesn't mean it's all fucking the hot tub .

Fuck it Like people are going to get in there after that fucking your room it's just 69 .

It was a triple X room . Everyone is all over the pavement Fuck it .

Funny is I think you actually think that way it's ? It's a total only so to sex , right , do you remember ?

Do you remember the kids that were like on top of the , like the slide , like you know to get into the slide but it looks over the triple X area and then it was a trip 18 and up area .

It's just adult , consenting adults . That's how I was going to carnival cruises Carnival cruises of triple X areas and kids on slide at the same time .

I've never seen it . I've been on a lot of carnival cruises .

I went on one carnival cruise and I was like this is ghetto . What are you thinking ?

about each other .

And I'm like a platinum member or something with them .

Royal Caribbean . I've done everything but Royal Caribbean . At this point , I have to . They're . So I'm going to do a princess Princess .

I've done princess , carnival , royal Caribbean , and then some other one that my mom took .

They offer packages like all inclusive with like drinks and everything it's pretty reasonable .

Have you ever done a cruise ?

Jordan . No , I'm good , I don't want to . Why ? I don't want to be on the water that long . You're not , I think , sailors , been on enough boats for the both of them .

No , he hasn't been on any .

I thought he was on a fucking boat . No , he hasn't been on a boat .

Just because he's in the Navy doesn't mean he's on a boat .

I thought all of them .

You know who else is on a boat , t-pain . You know what I mean .

He's on a boat , mother fucker , take a look at me . I took all your things that maybe he'll just sit on a boat all day and just sail around .

Just waiting for the adults , only place .

We went to adult only resort . Where's the adults only resort ?

Where all the sex happens .

Those are your triple X Navy boat . You have to find Everyone fly to .

We're all the Phantom . He has been on a boat , guys . Yes , I know , I know , I know .

When Jordan G Robin and I went to that Mexico thing last year that was adults only . Did you just assume it ?

was a triple X resort . They just had their dick swinging out and Chad was doing the helicopter , robin's tit did fall out .

I never knew about that .

Oh , really , he did at the restaurant .

Oh my .

God .

Did you get a free bottle after that ? No , I mean everything was free .

That was the night that you guys sent me crazy voice verbose when was this Last December I was in Mexico and we were leaving this nice Italian restaurant . She decides that it's easier to . Instead of walking through the door , she decides it's easier to crawl across this like bench . She's wearing a dress and it just like goes down .

She's like Did you get a look at it ?

It was a fun trip .

It was a great time .

We all had a great time . There was food , there was alcohol , there was pools . It was great .

I was like I'm going to get a cast on this one of the podcast and root . I was waiting . I said I made a mention .

I was like you said , quirks and roots .

I'm so sorry .

We're getting off a track forever , forever rootless , yeah , forever rootless .

Okay , so let's get back to the episode .

Yes , what else we have today ?

I mean , we just have your head , some stuff that he wanted to do . Come on , have your go so okay , first off , I just want to bring let me bring up the notes real quick , All right . So where the hell have y'all been for , like the past two months , two months ?

Crying in my bedroom , in my house , okay , in your house .

I'm becoming very agoraphobic in like a genuine way .

Yeah .

Ever since we started working at home , I don't like leaving the house . I have driving anxiety Like a bitch .

Oh , so you're the reason why everything is closing .

Yeah , probably yes .

It's for people like you .

Yeah , People

People suck at driving .

I don't drive that much . I drive like honest to God , like twice .

I almost got hit like twice on the way to work today , and I only work four miles away from here .

Yeah . It's so scary .

I get worse around people in person , not so much driving I don't like being in traffic , but like last night at the lightscape I was driving , I mean , I was getting real anxious .

Yeah .

Just trying to find pockets of where people weren't there . Yeah , because I just don't want to be around that many people . I would rather be at home these days .

I had a weird switch that happened recently .

That is fucking weird .

And I just don't like crowds Same . Yeah . So when we went to my birthday , we went to what was that place ? That restaurant Ruiata yeah , ruiata , yeah . They had the parade going on , and so , like I'm already paranoid as it is , I was waiting for that to be a shooter .

I wasn't paranoid about that .

I was just like very just on edge because of the amount of people right and so I was getting frustrated . Jesse said something I was finally like just like you got to fucking quit talking to me , because I can't .

That's so weird . I'm like you shut the fuck up . I'm looking at you Like I literally can't .

Like I'm so , like my like anxiety was so , so high , but I've been like that for years .

You should have just came up to the top of this .

I didn't know you all See , I didn't know you all are up there at the time .

Yeah , I knew you all were going .

I just didn't know I was actually already left .

So what do you think is the weird switch ? So the five of us you know at least four , three out of the five of us would go out pretty regularly .

I used to go out pretty regularly , like back in the day when you were 20 . Yeah , I did .

Yeah , but that was 20 years ago , so like the rest , of us what happened ? Because businesses are starting to go out of business . We don't go out as much , apparently , other people aren't going out as much . Do you think it's like just a money fucking situation ? Like people are just money fucking , money fucking situation ?

Well , I think it's . I think part of it is the the recession depression that we're in , right , everything's gone up in price . But like there's no money , right , like you're not , you're , you're , you're paid and really go up compared to like the 15% increase in shit .

No .

So I think that's part of it .

I think too is like honest , like we were talking about , like anxiety is cause I mean we say all the time , like she has my point of seventh at night , cause it's I don't want to die Exactly , and I don't like going to a lot of places .

I would rather just sit outside and drink some you know whiskies with a fire pit , maybe some music going on .

I'm here for that . I have a backyard hangout , yeah .

If I'm going to , I don't . I think my thing is , I don't feel like going to the same places during the same shit that I've been doing every other year . Like if I'm going to go to a new place and explore something new , sign me up . I'm all here for it .

So look , let me tell you this then , if you're ever in New York city , if you want to go spend , more money if you're ever in New York city and you are not the type of night out you used to be . There is a bar slash club called matinee , where they're open from 5pm to 10pm for people that don't like to stay out late .

Well , thank God , they told us that , but he says he's not going to New York city .

so much that's part of the problem is the crowds . Y'all are pussies .

Should we make a day club ? Should we make a place where you ? Go out and arrange like middle of the day , but it closes the door . They already have gay clubs .

Yeah , I love day drinking . Yeah , I like day drinking much more than night drinking .

Okay , but the problem is but how do you , how do you handle the crowds ? I don't know if there would be a crowd at a day club from 5 to 10 .

But hear me out .

What if there is so like ? They're like oh , this is the perfect time because there's not going to be crowds , and then all of a sudden , a lot of people show up because they all have the same mindset . Now you got a big fucking crowd of anxious people .

Make it members only .

Yeah , you could do members only route , or you could just put a line out the door and only keep 20 people in at a time , cause now you're gaining interest and you've got people in line that .

just have to wait 20 people is a loser place ?

Oh , 25 maybe . Well , the bids are how big the room is .

What if ?

you have like a giant room , like sub rooms , and they all have like a theme go party in this cool .

Studio 80 .

And they're basically that's the container bar in Austin . Well sorry , well sorry .

People are stealing my fucking ideas before I think of them . That's not my problem .

What if we have this bar where , when you walk in , you have to grab a color and that's the room you're assigned to ?

swingers bar .

I don't like that . Is this a dildo ?

Now , if we're talking about putting our keys in a ball .

You're talking about Colette and Dallas .

What is it coming in for ?

the check when you think stuff's going to land and it doesn't know it's a swingers bar and Dallas makes a club where the outside looks like the inside and the inside looks like the outside .

We just watched that the other day . I love that movie . It's so good .

Wait , is that the movie ?

Yeah , oh , what's the ? Name of the movie now Chris Gitan right and then we'll fair . Yeah , not at the Roxbury . Like we need to make a club . People are always waiting in line . Why don't you make the inside of the club the outside and the outside of the club the inside , and they end up doing that . That's the whole thing .

It's a great movie . You should watch it

There's so many things everyone wants you to watch .

I don't have time . You do , though I know I don't do anything .

I literally don't do anything .

Don't use that as an excuse . Just say I don't want to .

I don't know what the you know , I don't know , I don't know what the answer is , though , like how do you , how do you get past that aspect ? I mean , do you just like forever stay in home ?

No , just give me a place , that is cool , I don't go . Give me a pretty drink , make it pink and I'm there .

Look , it doesn't take much to try it right there . It's pretty in Instagramable photos .

Okay , kate , but how do we just ?

get out of the house . Cheap , cheap yeah .

Like a dive bar .

I really don't get out of the house that much . That's what I'm saying .

Like , how do you get out , how do we get you out of the house ? Like what ?

would . What would drive you to get out of the house ? You got to get . See , here's the deal . You got to get Jordan out first .

Look , the house is . The house is on fire .

You have to get out , can I ?

drive to Jordan's house . Set up a gaming room . Yes , you should drive to Jordan's house .

I'll just hang out in Jordan's house instead .

So what would be yours ? So then , how's your date ? Date nights then ? Like , how do you do that ?

Well , prospectually , sometimes we have plans and then I say can we please just stay inside ?

Really .

Yeah , we'll like order and wash away .

But also like . But like I mean whenever you go out , though I mean like whenever . The times that you go out , where do you go Like ? Where do y'all go Cause ? Where you're at , where you live they ?

don't go , they don't go that much .

Also he , like he , is usually available much later and I've worked and I am so emotionally drained after my day I literally don't want to do anything but cry into a pillow and lay in my house . But I mean we go to , like eat and stuff at different places . We try a lot of different spots that we'll find Kind of everywhere .

This Saturday , this Friday , this Friday .

That reminds me Sorry , I know you are , but this Friday is the .

Panther City , la Crosse Club . We got free tickets . Oh yeah , we did , did you forget .

I did too , until she said it just now .

I said a link .

Yeah , tim sent a link for free tickets I got two free tickets . Can anyone use that link ? Yeah , where's it over ?

I'll try to see if it's still , we should all go again .

Well , it was so much fun last year . We had so much fun . We're celebrating a lot of freaking .

Christmas things this weekend . Come on with it . All right , pimp , let's do it . Stay list , don't do me with a good time . That's how you get them out right there .

You asked that how you do it .

And they remind them how to get free tickets to go to one of them .

You can go to you .

Oh yeah .

I definitely forgot , because I agreed to go to a show , oh shit .

So realistically , the best way to get me out to do anything is you plan it and I just throw up and I'll be like cool , I'll be there , I'll be there .

That's why people love Chad because he plans everything . Nobody was like uh , Jesus was talking about how he went to Portland and with Noel , or some of our friends and is like uh yeah , I don't know , I don't know what , we didn't do shit , because normally Chad's with us and he plans everything . We just stayed at the fucking room .

I don't know , that's a good trip to me , yeah .

Yeah , I guess I've been going to shows , that . When you said that I've been going to a lot of shows , well , a lot is dramatic . I've been going to shows .

Yeah , mostly his .

No , no , just just show . I mean , I do get off his shows , but why Because ?

he's because she's supportive , so supportive , I've like I know it's amazing .

I'm like , okay , can I go home ? Yet you can stay here . I have to go to bed , right now . I did that last show he had . He's like okay , it was like no one . The second he got done there was like four people after him . I was like I need to go to bed right now so I left . Um , yeah , his shows , every shows . Trevor has a show coming up in .

January that I'll be at .

And I mean I'm going to Kansas . I guess that's exciting , Not ?

fucking love Kansas .

Fuck , love it hey . So Tis the season .

We got Christmas coming up right and there's a lot of movies that you're supposed to be watching before we get in the movies real quick yeah .

This because this goes into Christmas stuff , so forever reckless has a has merchandise right .

Yeah .

Why do you seem so upset when he has to try to promote your shit ? I was reading so I want to know what .

So some of my favorite merchandise has come from forever reckless .

And my canceled . My canceled sweatshirt is amazing , Thank you .

That is my favorite crew neck , or one of my favorite crew necks . Um , what do y'all got new stuff that's coming out ? Yes , okay , because guess what ?

I . This is going to be on the fabric , the word forever reckless . This is gonna be on a new episode tomorrow , but I was finally able to get the forever reckless calm From shop for a reckless to forever reckless right now . I'm trying to . I'm revamping it so that I have like a playable link to the podcast on there , as well as the shopping stuff .

That's a big deal . Yeah , forever . Reckless is a good like two word combo . Thank you , right , and you got the entire Dot com . Yeah itself . Yeah , it's not net .

It's not dot gov , it's calm . You think there's a forever reckless dot gov . The way our government's acting .

Yeah , we are the new government , I'm telling you .

So you got , you got . So if people wanted to order , they'd be able to get merchandise and give it as Christmas gifts and all stuff . But you got any like new shirts , new Hat , knew anything , or just old stuff right now , or old stuff .

right now it is coming .

It is coming .

Yes , I am taking a bunch of stuff down and redoing it , like the kind of fun , kind of toxic t-shirt . I want to turn that into a sweatshirt or hoodie and then some other things .

That's my sister's favorite . That's like one of her favorite shirts .

Yeah , I didn't know that she had that yeah , yeah she's like I've got your stuff . You're like what ?

Yeah , she's a . She's a big supporter of that kind of stuff . She likes being toxic , I think .

Everyone does all right .

So Javier wants to come up with the movies he's like . We gotta talk about movies .

Who . What's this video thing about ? Is this ? Well , yeah , how do you had a video . You want to play this video .

No , it was the tiktok video .

Yeah .

I think it's . It wasn't a part of the movie thing , it's just like something that with like with your family . That's like toxic .

Well , let's , let's play that . I thought it was pretty funny . You want to set it up for us ? No ?

no , just . Let's just let it roll the one time Javier brings a video .

For you best for for 2024 , just just let it . Just let it roll .

All right , here we go .

Okay Timmy , why don't you go ahead and open up your gift ? Oh my god , now what do we say to Santa ? Think Santa , okay Jimmy , why don't you go ahead and open up your gift now ? Oh Nice , a pair of socks , just like I wanted . Santa knows best . Well , it looks like someone made the naughty . Jimmy , that's your little brother .

I fucked that stuff , the fuck up , right now , okay , jimmy , he's only nine years old and I will pull up to cash these hands .

Okay , just be grateful that you got socks . Socks , mama , one of the PS5 . Jimmy , you're 25 , get yourself a fucking PS5 . I'm doing bomb with the economy fucked right now . I do , mom . It's called a fucking pyramid . You're still a father ? Santa's gonna put you on the naughty list . That's what Timmy . Santa's not fucking real .

What is wrong with you ?

aggressive . So , like what's your funniest moments ? What are your funniest moments , like you know , with family . That's been very toxic . Who wants to go ?

Oh my god , I have a really good one . Okay , this is perfect . I'm glad this is the perfect .

We all fight a word yeah , which one ?

you go first . Okay , so I went to go to Christmas . It's probably like the last Christmas . I sent one family and we're opening gifts , whatever . I opened some gifts for my family in Georgia cool , sweet gifts , actual gifts open the gifts for my parents and I unbox it and it's a bible . Oh my , it's very simple .

I was like what the fuck is this ?

and so I was just like Okay , and then I never went to Christmas again with them .

Oh my god , that's , that's heavy , that's pretty fucking heavy .

Well , I have . It's quite similar actually . Um , my parents love to um act like I'm more religious than I am Because that helps them sleep at night , I guess , um , and so it was like my . Actually , it was the first three years ago because it was the first Christmas I spent in Texas .

So you were here in Texas ?

Yeah , it was the first Christmas I lived in Texas and so I was like Already pretty like on edge in general of like lord being in this state and yeah , I got a devotional and it's that . I hope you find God inside the cover .

Oh , I mean , I just have uh , I don't have anything like that . I've got family members that like to get all political and racist .

But oh same . Yeah , that's always fun . That's after they give you the devotional . Then they ask you who'd you vote for ? Oh , they don't , they don't , they don't ask that .

But uh , they'd like to go into the whole , uh you know , uh fat people and uh Mexicans mostly .

Holy , okay , yeah cool .

It was like the two topics and I'm like all right , I'm out . You're seeing a fat mexican or whore man if , if , if they did they probably , they probably explode .

Wow .

Just make them make their head blow up , so I should never meet

them then you won't , it's fine Okay .

You're their worst nightmare .

Hey , senior , I'm here to eat your food .

Make the tortillas for him . I can see that because I'm Mexican .

I don't have the ones , the only ones that I really have was like maybe two years after my parents got a divorce , like they had a huge argument about like who's gonna be with who ? You know that situation .

We had to spend .

Christmas in a hotel .

It was a it was a year for the Hernandez family . That's weird , man . Big year for us .

And then our mom bought us a tv and then , uh , we didn't get to use the tv she's just trying to win you back ended up being a tv for the living room , so we're like oh . Okay .

Wow boom roasted from the chat boom roasted .

But uh , no , yeah , no , these are great . Now , my family's cool . You know , my mom gets on the like , like she's like , uh , my mom's like , oh , who does tammy want for for christmas ? Does she want a crib ? I'm like , crib for what mom's like ?

Yeah , like you already have one mom , she already yeah .

Yeah , she follows me on instagram now , so I can't do anything dirty .

Your mom does . Yeah , does she follow the show ?

yet she does follow the show oh .

She doesn't watch like I'm gonna slide in her dms . You son with the uh the From the show .

I hope so do it no .

That'd be weird .

No , that's gonna haunt my dreams . Okay , how about you boys ? What's y'all's terrible ? Chad , what's your terrible ? I already told mine I don't .

I don't really remember any like super awful a holiday memories . I mean like On the same thing with tim , like family just talking shit , or we never see you , oh , and you just want to get the fuck out of there .

Or they're talking about politics , or I think there's a reason why I never see you .

Yeah , that part , that kind of stuff . Like you drove 30 minutes out of your way to just be around bullshit yeah . I don't know but you know , growing up like obviously with divorced families , it was fun because you got two christmas's .

like that , though , holy bae , you got eight crazy nights and then you got , like you know , divorced parents , so you got like 16 crazy nights .

How do you feel about the things going on in the middle east ? That's what the conversation .

I would just wouldn't , though . Can we censor ?

that .

So I thought I thought you're gonna play that video . This is what I just lost my shit because I thought you're gonna play that video

What's your favorite . So what's your favorite holiday ?

trauma , actually , you know what ?

Yeah , we'll do it , we'll do a 360 or 180 .

What was your favorite christmas gift growing up ?

um my favorite christmas of growing up , shit um .

That's weird gift . Yeah , is it because you ?

were bad or naughty that year .

I was a great kid . I got all the gifts . I got a lot of gifts .

She got colon shit .

It was probably like this barbie doll house I got when I was younger and I then I had one of those life-sized barbies .

Can I let me ask you did you have the ? Did you have the dark skin , barbie ?

Yeah , I well , I don't think you call her dark skin .

Yeah , you're saying the wrong thing .

I don't know what's appropriate , like I don't want to say , I don't want to say black barbie .

Why not ? Why what's wrong ?

with that african-american barbie .

No , black barbie , but is it ?

Just don't say the other word . Do they have a hispanic barbie ? Yes , I see , I don't .

I don't know these things .

I thought they had like a white and a no .

No , like darker shade , I think it's disabled the nicest gift , yeah . So I had a Black barbie .

That was like life like the life size of three foot tall one . Yeah , those things are creepy yeah very scary .

But then no , the creepy gift that . It was really sweet . My grandma got all of her grandkids . Um , when you got us to a certain age , you got this porcelain doll Made of you .

No .

Like we had a matching outfit . It had , like my same hair .

So it was like somewhere .

Um , it's pretty shown , it's my dad's outside .

Oh my god , we have to , we have to retrieve it . We have to retrieve it , isn't that ?

like .

I want to see this thing .

I feel like that's like the premise of like the skeleton key or something like all daddy johnson , right now I want to .

I have got to see this thing .

I'm gonna see I'll talk to missy if he has it .

I just want to go to the group chat real quick . Hobby year has a life size . It's called .

I don't call it a barbie , it's called a love doll . They call it adult , only barbie .

It's uh , that one from dave it's just like just a torso .

I tried to watch dave and jesse , so we were watching it and that episode came up and she was like what the Fuck is this ? Yeah just cut it off . Yeah , we were we were done with dave .

Uh , kate , what was your favorite ? Uh , christmas presents .

Well , that's good question . I don't remember most of my childhood , so whether that's a good thing or a bad thing , I don't know , um so or even recently .

Just answer the question .

I'm literally trying to think Just answer the fucking question . I don't remember if I got it in my sister , but we had one of those Barbie Jeeps that I got .

Oh , yeah , yeah that was pretty fun .

I never got a Power Wheels . Oh , you mean like the Power Wheels ? Yeah .

Did you have one ?

I'm glad you didn't either .

I was a little scary on it . I think she'd feel better . I was too poor for that .

Oh yeah , same , Okay , cool . So we were all in the same boat . I was too . That's why I think it might have been my sister's that I just got as a hand-me-down . Yeah , hey you fucking .

at least you got . You got to drive it around , I did . We always had to go to my cousin's house because they had a Power Wheels the blue one with the like RC lights up top Good stuff . Loved it On the group chat . Loved the Milk Table episode . That was a hilarious episode .

Is that Dave ? Yeah , yeah , he's in the garage , all right , so I did bring a movie bracket , okay , so let's pull that up , and we're gonna have to go through this , and I don't know what Christmas movies you've seen , and so you might not be able to answer some of these . I don't even know if I can see it . Oh my God , guys , this is so many .

You know I hate it .

Holy shit man , If .

I'm blind for everything else .

Jesus , Marian . Let me pull the bracket up on my phone so I can actually see it .

I feel like I can see Prancer preacher .

This is just a few too many . I can see anal butt sex .

I can see an ass come out of your hand , so whenever you all had .

Okay , funny story about Christmas movies . So when y'all had Jared on , y'all were talking about Christmas movies a little bit . It was a little preemptive .

It was too much two weeks before .

Well you know , like Lifetime or like Netflix shows , Well , he had a list of Christmas movies , and so number one on that one was Scrooge , and I was like I don't remember watching that , but there has been a Scrooge movie , cause there's like what , 12 variants of that movie at this point .

The Jim Carrey one .

No , bill Murray , one Scrooge , and so y'all mentioned that as like the number one or something like that on that list .

That's what they had . That particular list yeah .

So Sarah and I watched it last week Cause I was just like I gotta watch this movie again , and that was it . That was the one I've been looking for Every year . I watched one new Scrooge movie trying to find the dark one , and you found it . Yeah , that was it , the Bill Murray one . Yeah , it's on Pluto . It's great .

All right , let's just go through this bracket . We can go through it pretty quick , I think .

Yeah , yeah .

All right . Christmas Vacation versus Harold and Kumar . 3d Christmas Christmas .

Vacation All right .

Christmas Vacation goes Prancer versus . Santa Claus is coming to town .

Santa Claus is coming to town , okay .

Frosty the snowman versus mixed nuts I've never seen .

I'm gonna go , frosty .

I like nuts . We know Bad Santa versus Claus Claus Bad Santa .

I've never seen it , bad Santa .

A Muppet Christmas Carol or Deck the Halls .

A Muppet Christmas Carol , A Muppet Deck the Halls for me but Muppet wins , you lose .

You lose Scrooge 1951 versus Holiday Inn .

Is this ? Is this a ? I'm gonna go with Scrooge . It's not Ludacris . It's not Ludacris , is it ? Yeah , yeah .

I'm gonna go with Scrooge 1951 . Sure , all right , disney's Christmas Carol versus .

Jack Frost , christmas Carol , christmas Carol .

All right , die Hard versus Holiday Affair . Die Hard , rudolph the Red Nose Render versus the Shop Around the Corner .

Rudolph Rudolph , rudolph , rudolph , rudolph .

Rudolph Rudolph , rudolph Rudolph Rudolph , rudolph , rudolph Rudolph .

What's the word ? Like every other fucking like love story movie that's based off a fucking holiday . It's very cliche .

Yeah , it is . It's a very cliche movie . The Polar Express versus the Family Stone . Wait , what Polar ?

Express .

Family Stone .

Family Stone I've seen the Family Stone so many times and I still can't tell you what it's about .

I love it . I have never heard of that . Is that the one with Horse Face Right ? Yeah , that's the one with like .

Rachel McAdams .

Yeah , and Horse Face yeah , and the other not . Luke Wilson , owen Wilson .

Yeah , because .

Rachel .

McAdams is the other movie . The other movie is with Luke Wilson .

Oh Jessica , sarah Jessica Parker , yeah .

I'm going to go with Family Stone , family Stone 3 against 2 .

Family Stone wins .

All right , it's a wonderful life versus why ?

you were sleeping . It's a wonderful life , sure .

I've spent so many years since I've seen that I feel like that's the one I'm going to watch this season . I'm going to go with it . I don't watch it . I don't like it . I like it , it's depressing right .

I don't like it .

No , it's not .

It's a good movie . So it's about a guy who wants to kill himself on Christmas .

So a little depressing , but then he's like .

he finds it . Oh , it's a wonderful life . I shouldn't kill myself . Spoiler alert I don't like your money . It's been out since like what ?

Jimmy has your money and Sam has your money . I don't have your money , you don't have your money .

Every time of the hour You're so full . What are you doing with my ?

money . That's how Jimmy Stewart talks .

Yeah , it is You're not wrong . All right , so you all go in for it . It's a wonderful life . Maricallan , 34th Street , 1947 , or the Little Drummer Boy .

I've never seen either one . All right , we're going to go with .

Maricallan 34th Street , because I've never seen one before .

Scrooged versus the Grinch Scrooge , so I'm going with Scrooge , wait , which Grinch . Is it in Carybatch ?

2018 ? 2018? .

Oh , the Grinch .

Scrooge was fantastic , but the Grinch is up there with Elf . That's the animated one . They made one . It's the .

Scrooge one yeah .

It's the 3D one .

It's the 3D , one that Benedict Carybatch did .

Oh , 2018 . Not in Carybatch , no , no , scrooge , scrooge .

All right , love actually versus For Christmas . Ah , they're both so good though .

Love actually is so much better .

I do . I'll tell you what For .

Christmas . This is so much better .

It's a universally hated scene . It's the card scene with the guy from the . Walking .

Dead .

I'm like you're a shitty best friend for wanting to fuck your best friend's wife . She's shittier yeah .

Oh , and she kissed him .

That bitch kissed him .

OK , hold on , Ha , so it's two and two . Kate , you're the tiebreaker Love actually , or For Christmas , or For Christmas .

I've never seen For Christmas , so I do have to go love actually .

Yes .

All right , Love actually .

And then that fucking weird-looking British guy got the fuck out of you though . All right , All those girls .

Elf versus the preacher's wife Elf Elf , elf , elf , elf , are you kidding Elf ?

Elf is the best Christmas movie of all time .

I'd rather gouge my eyes out than watch Elf again . Wow , all right , so we got Christmas .

Vacation versus Santa Claus is coming to town Christmas Vacation , christmas Vacation All right . So we've got Frosty Snowman versus Bad Santa .

Bad Santa , bad Santa the change it gives me .

A Muppet Christmas Carol versus Scrooge 1951 .

Muppet Christmas Carol , muppet Christmas Carol , muppet Christmas Carol .

Let's see We've got a Disney's Christmas Carol versus Die Hard .

Die Hard .

Die Hard for me .

Die Hard , die Hard .

OK , let's see , we've got Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer , reindeer , reindeer , render Versus Miracle on 34th Street .

Rudolph Render , rudolph Rudolph . Yeah , I got to All the claymation ones are extremely short . You can watch all the claymations in an hour .

Did we say Polar Express one ? No , oh , family Stone , family Stone , one . Family Stone versus it's a Wonderful Life .

It's a Wonderful Life . It's a Wonderful Life .

Family Stone . For me , it doesn't matter how good there you are OK , wonderful , ok , fine .

Let's see .

Miracle on 34th Street , 1947 versus Scrooge , scrooge . And then we have Love Actually One . So Love Actually versus Elf .

Oh , love Actually , Elf , elf man . Ok Tim , you got a pick Tim .

Elf .

OK , you don't like Elf either .

You're out of your damn box . It's not good .

You can say it so like it is the best Christmas movie of all time . It's fun to watch , but I don't .

I mean , I like love actually better because it's it's will ferrell and it's funny , but it's cute and the music you have a hard on for will ferrell .

I love will .

will ferrell , you say it like it's a bad thing with the neck and the attitude . Come on .

I love will ferrell talking out of neck making the speaker True , you don't have a pinpoque now .

Well , hey , that's not something I would ever say . Okay .

That's fucked up . Oh wow , that's wow . Oh Christmas Vacation .

Sorry , I struck a nerve that one time , chris never got a Christmas vacation versus bad Santa . Christmas vacation .

That's an application .

Christmas vacation , that's another one with Billy Bob .

Thornton .

Christmas vacation and all right Christmas vacation wins on that one .

All right , so I'm having like look at this now Okay , so I'm up at Christmas Carol versus Scrooge .

I'm up . Oh , I'm sorry .

No , I'm sorry , we already got that one Scrooge . It was Muppet . Christmas Carol won that one .

First man my eyes are here , we go this is where it all gets lost .

Muppet Christmas Carol versus Die Hard Die .

Hard .

Die Hard okay .

Ho , ho ho , I have a machine gun now .

Maybe KA motherfucker .

Such a great movie All right .

So we said Rudolph , the Red Nose reindeer , versus the family stone . Rudolph , rudolph , the family stone , for me Family stone .

I don't think I've ever seen Rudolph , but I don't like the family stone , so I'm saying Rudolph , all right .

Let's see Miracle on 35 . Okay , so Scrooge won that one . Scrooge versus Elf Elf , elf , elf , scrooge .

You're just going to tell me any of the other ones have you ?

ever seen it so frustrating . I've never been so mad at you . I've seen a version of Scrooge and I know all of them are better than Elf ?

Is this the memory ?

Scrooge versus Elf . Yeah , bill Murray . We'll say , bill Murray , shut up . I'm going to go with Elf . I'm going to say Elf , okay .

Because , look , I'll tell you right now , I only saw half of Scrooge . I only saw half of it . And then you know , we got tired . No , we went to sleep .

Thank God , I heard .

Gary , all right .

So we're at Christmas vacation versus somebody Suck me Sorry . Wow , versus diehard .

Wait , wait , say it again .

Christmas vacation versus diehard .

Oh , diehard Christmas vacation , diehard Christmas vacation All right so Christmas vacation on that one .

And then we've got this is making me a little bit anxious , so a lot of emotions going around there is .

Making me a little bit scared . After the show ends we're going to have like a knife fight .

I'll be in my car .

Sharpened candy canes .

Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer versus .

Elf , repeating ones at this point .

Elf . We already did that one Elf .

Did we ? It's okay , this is like the big bracket . You're doing your best , elf .

Elf , okay , let's do it decent , all right . So we're down to Fort , we're down , yeah , we're down , to Hang on . I've got to . I've got to see where . This is a big list . This is way too big of a list . We said we know .

Christmas vacation .

Yeah Versus Elf . Elf , I'm going with Elf .

Christmas vacation Elf yes , that's close though I do think that those two are in the top . So did a Christmas story not even make this list .

That's good . It's actually on the other side . Okay , oh , this was one side , that was one side . Okay , we're done . We're done . Holy shit , this is the biggest bracket of all time , Timothy it's got all the movies All right , I'm just going to go down the other list and just show you , just tell you which movies are on there .

You don't have to no .

Because I mean you were asking .

My top two is the Elf and then the Jim Carrey Grinch . Those are my two favorite books .

The Jim Carrey Grinch is superior to the animated one . I didn't even watch that one fully , all right , so the other brackets got Home Alone .

The Lemon Drop , kid Jingle All the Way , the Santa Claus 2 , nightmare Before Christmas . Christmas with the Cranks , the Grinch 2000 .

Can I say something real quick ?

The Santa Claus 3 .

You know what's a really good Christmas movie ? What ? The one with Jonathan Taylor Thomas , yeah .

Yeah , I'll be home for Christmas . I'll be home for Christmas With Jessica .

Biel , jessica Biel . I said it . I was like , holy fuck , it's Jessica Biel .

Yes , Is she like super young ?

Yeah , I'm sorry .

The Santa Claus 2, . Nightmare Before Christmas . Christmas with the Cranks , the Grinch , the Santa Claus 3 , the Santa Claus Mikey's . Once Upon a Christmas , Santa Claus 3 is awful .

Is that ? The one where he like , creates the clone . No , that's two . No , that's two .

I think that's the one . I think that's the one with all the elements .

That's two Christmas yeah , Santa Claus 2 is where he creates the clone . So what's three ? Is it the ?

one with the element , the element . With the Barton Short , oh , and he's like the Jack Frost or whatever type character .

A Christmas Carol 1984 . Fantastic A Chipmunk Christmas .

Oh I love that one .

Mickey's Christmas Carol .

Mickey's Christmas Carol . I try to watch every year . Trading places Never saw it Wait that's the one with Gwyneth Paltrow .

Yeah , where they go . No , no , no , no , they do . Yeah , that's the fighting force .

Yeah , yeah , no , that's the holiday . Never mind , I'm confused .

No , the holiday is with camera games . Yeah ,

Christmas story yes , okay , krampus .

Oh no , no , thank you the .

Christmas Chronicles .

Last holiday .

A Bredic , the Christmas .

Chronicles .

The Christmas Chronicles Bredic Bredic .

The last holiday , or last holiday ?

That's one with Queen Latifah .

Gremlins , oh yeah .

I watched that last night actually .

Arthur Christmas .

I don't think I've ever actually watched all of it through Dude .

it's fucking great . It's on HBO .

Really yeah .

I'm going to have to check it out . Did you ever watch Last Christmas , the one with ? Is that the one with Chris Brown Last Christmas ? Oh she has that one yeah .

Yeah , because then they go to the grocery store and she's cheating the girls cheat , yes , with the fucking , and then she comes with a fucking dinner .

And I love that movie so good . And then they got another one that's for Mexicans , it's like . It's like . It's like keep on every dive .

It's not you guys are losing so many listeners right now .

No we're good , all right .

Earn . No change there . Ernest saves Christmas .

Yeah , I saw that . Oh shit , there's an Ernest Christmas movie .

Yeah . That's another one I got to watch this week I got to find it Shit . I don't know where it was the night before Christmas .

How far down are you with this list ? We're almost done .

White .

Christmas , white Christmas is . Uh . I just think I've done with this one , mr .

Magoo's Christmas Carol , a Charlie Brown Christmas , Bad Santa 2 , Fred Claus , the year without Santa Claus , the Grinch , 1966 , and Jack Frost 1979 .

I'm going to have to tell you , Tim , I love you and you do such a great job keeping this show together .

Hey , you wanted one of us do shit anymore . You wanted something . You wanted something . I gave you what you wanted .

You're exactly right , but this list was do-do . I thought it was good . It was the longest list . We took an hour basically to do half the list .

Half the list . We did take an hour .

So there was one . I did tell Tim to add a movie to the required watching list of movies . Not a movie , it's an episode of everyone here has seen the Bear .

Yes , no , but I want to .

OK , so you're going to watch the .

What episode was that it was the Christmas episode , Dude . It's so fucked up and it's like the most dysfunctional .

This will make you the most anxious watching a TV show oh yeah , you will have just that

one episode . Great , I'm on it .

The following episode . You got to watch it in order Because the following episode makes up with it , with a bunch of love and feel good and it's amazing . It's a good transition , but that episode is like in a family kitchen during a family Christmas , when you've got a dysfunctional family all in the same house .

And , like mom's , got some severe mental illness and it's just , it's bad and who's the mom .

What's she play ? Jamie Lee Curtis , jamie Lee Curtis . Yeah , yeah , it's such a good episode , john .

Mulaney's in it , bob Odenkirk .

It's just so stressful yeah .

It's like a literal anxiety attack in the entire episode .

Yeah .

But like that show is like it's great though it really is .

All right , so pretend you're not . Your significant others aren't listening . What did you get them for Christmas ? Oh , here what . I'm just fucking with you . We didn't get .

Christmas last night oh really what kind , what'd you ?

say Cowboy boots .

Oh hell yeah , nice .

I want to get cowboy boots and a cowboy hat because I want to do this new thing Cowboy boots and cowboy hat I want to do .

Cowboy boots and a cowboy hat Cowboy boots and a cowboy hat Cowboy boots and a cowboy hat Cowboy boots and a cowboy hat Cowboy boots and a cowboy hat .

Yeah .

So they're Ariott .

Ariott .

Yeah , oh , I have a pair . I love them ? I don't . I've never owned cowboy boots .

I think 2024 is the year of the cowboy and I'm going to be cowboy .

I'm going to be cowgirl of shit . Call me Jordan , jordan , jordan .

J-O-R-D-A-N . My name's Jordan .

We're changing the spelling .

Yeah , yeah , wow .

My name's Jordan . I went to Texas A&M University . I was going to say hook up war . No , it's Giggle , it's Giggle , hey , giggle I love the .

I love that time of year . Get over at TCU , go Frogs . I was like , okay , my name's Sadie , my name's .

Sadie , my name's Sadie .

I'm going to get more grapes , so I didn't go to college .

My name's Sadie and I'm going to MSU . I'm a slut .

That was the best video of all time , though the first one . Yeah , it was just like they're all the same thing . They're all the exact same person at all these different schools . It was perfect . It's very scary , so good .

All right , so I do have a question though .

Okay , all right .

What is a must ? Watch movie for y'all .

Are we still talking about movies ? Yeah , we're going to finish this up with it .

Oh my God , so must watch like you're going to . You got to watch it every year . Elf , elf .

You're , you're , elf , the holiday .

The holiday Chat , elf , elf for you , home alone too , we should have the second one , second one . I think the second one is superior than the first one .

I got to rewatch it . It's what a New York it's the idea of , like that's when he's in the hotel , right , yeah , yeah .

So you get the hotel , hotel aspect , motel , the holiday Holiday in . Yeah , you got that . He's in a different city so he's having to like really think on his feet , right , he's in a different place that he's not familiar with . It just really shows that Kevin McAllister is the MacGyver of our generation . I'm going to stop you right now .

It wasn't Ludacris , it's Chingie Chingie does holiday here . Ludacris is on the remix . Rub on your nipples .

Yeah , that's gonna be Some balmy Ludacris , some balmy Miss Awego , fall from little , make them .

Coming in from the emo . Emo Emotakos says Polar Express is a must .

watch those dead eyes freak me out , so I watch it last night .

I don't get to the first time since I was like five and I hated it just as much as I hated it before . It scares the fuck out of me .

The little black girl with the pigtails . So scary I look after I wash my hair and I look at it . That one nerdy kid .

It's like , hey , you know what kind of train this is .

Oh , the one that's on all the memes . I would beat the fuck out of him he's like and all the memes , right .

I was watching it like genuinely getting so angry . I was like why did that bitch have to get involved , if you just mind your own fucking business ? No , this would have happened . I just kept getting more mad and I was like this is why I don't watch this movie .

And Tim . She said the black girl from Polar Express , but to you dark skin girl from Polar .

Express , just so you understand . I just want to make sure I'm saying the right thing .

He doesn't hear color .

At this point .

At this point .

He's got to get a shade . So you know what's a good question Like what rapper would give like the best Christmas presents ?

I'm going to go . We're going to go somewhere else today . I'm going to go first . I'm going to go first . What rapper would give the best blow ? I mean ?

Christmas present . Which rapper gives the best blow ? Oh no , I think Drake would give the best presents .

No , no , drake would make it about himself . I think Tyler the creator would give the best gift .

I think he would , but it would be the best gift . It would be very authentic .

It'd be specific and genuine .

I'm 100% on that one , I'm going to say Post Malone .

I was thinking Post Malone , he is probably one of the nicest , most sincere guys .

I have a hard time considering him a rapper .

I know I get that .

I understand that , like R&B artists maybe , but that's what I think of him .

Yeah .

He's in that category and I think that , just as a person , he's one of the better ones . He would probably hire someone to go find out your background to get you the perfect gift .

No , that's Nardwar . Does Nardwar count ?

Nardwar would give the best gift .

But he doesn't count . Yeah , who the fuck is Nardwar , nardwar so he interviews people .

He's like a human serviette Serviette .

He's a Canadian . He's a Canadian guy , so he knows everything about everybody .

And he always comes up and will say the most obscure thing , like he'll be like Jordan , and then would say like , oh , he wears the hat , yeah , he wears the hat . And he would say something from your childhood that no one should know , but somehow he knows .

And you forgot until he brought it up and you're like , how did you know that ? And everyone freezes out .

You're Jordan Johnson . We have to know . That's how we sound .

Yeah , all right , let's get off of movies and music .

Can I ?

talk something else Christmas . What else Christmasy can we discuss ? So what do ?

y'all's families eat for Christmas . I'll go first Tamale .

In my opinion , you would have given me one guess I would have gotten that right

Christmas dinner was never like a thing . It was always Christmas breakfast . So my granddad would like make the big waffles and everything like that .

Yeah .

That's nice .

Yeah , disconnected bitch . Tim is out of here . Ha ha .

Suck it bitch . I turned myself off Belgium waffles Belgium waffles . Like the big waffles , like Belgium waffles .

Yeah .

So are you a- , but they bird them .

They're black waffles , oh my goodness .

Don't or dark few waffles .

Are you a ?

fluffy waffle lover .

I like it a little crunch .

Okay , so burnt waffles , got it ? No , no , it's not burnt , it's just like crisp . Yeah , it's got to have a crisp to it . It's not like just like a pillow , but like the big squares .

Yeah , the one he needs to make us were like four squares .

Oh man .

He had a fancy one , you know .

That's fucking giant Boo .

Boo Gee .

Like a waffle house size waffle .

Yeah .

But I want the little squares .

No .

What about you , Kate . You have any kind of like food ?

tradition no .

The widest food you've ever made .

Growing up . What did you like ? What was the food y'all ate for Christmas , or like Christmas Eve ?

We yeah . So my family growing up like we didn't do a big like Christmas day thing . We'd like hang out a little bit , but our thing was Christmas Eve . So like Christmas Eve we'd go to church together , whole family's over . We'd get apple bees .

I fucking love apple bees . Just bitching apple bees , I'm so serious .

I think about this every time I have apple bees , because my grandma , like she , a writer , die for some fucking bees and we'd get like wings and our son's short answer tip and we would just , yeah , and we just have so much apple bees and we would just make like a cheese ball and like little appetizers and shit .

I was like I'm gonna say that sounds wonderful . It was really fun . That's like right up there , Like if you said chilies , I'd be really on board .

Oh yeah , guys , there's a new chilies on my house . I know , yeah , yeah , you open up , yeah , everything you have everything over there and Sailor is really happy about that and we just figured out that we're gonna get a super target . Yeah , what the fuck ? Yeah , I do believe that You're gonna have everything there For real .

I believe chilies is his mecca .

Probably so . On the group chat , for me the Emuotaku . This is so Kansas and apple bees feast , LOL .

Yes , it is . Thank you so much .

I think it's wonderful , I think it's , I think it's , that's , that's wonderful .

So my family used to do like a , like a traditional , like almost like a half Thanksgiving where you'd have just a bunch of food on Christmas day . But then we got older and it got so much more difficult to try to fit in three Christmases on Christmas day . So I just like came out with my mom and I'm like look , where are you ? Oh , here we are .

Lol , how did she take it ?

Fabulous .

She knew I mean , let's see real .

It caused its class . Yeah , sarah's had to be really pissed .

She also knew .

So I told my mom I was like we , we , we gotta do Christmas Eve , like this is ridiculous , like I'm literally just on the road all day Christmas . And so we did Christmas Eve and we started just doing like random , like one year would be Mexican , the next year would be like sandwiches , the next year whatever . So we just like swap it out .

That's cool . My mom's all about like Because we're gonna do Chris this morning . Yeah and she's like oh , I'll make a breakfast casserole . I don't want to tell her , I'm not a fan , I'm not a fan of that .

Essentially just a big quiche right .

Yeah , I'm with you , jordan .

I'm like fuck you mom .

That's what she wants to make give me breakfast in a cube .

Just cut it up like a lasagna . I don't really just have like a bunch of scrambled eggs or some bacon .

Yeah maybe make some burritos , I don't know . I might . I might pose that with her and just be like hey , let me just come over and make , we'll make breakfast burritos .

What are you gonna have for this year for breakfast ?

That's what I was saying . It's gonna be a breakfast casserole is what she wants to do . I'm thinking I might try to convince her . Just let me make breakfast burritos , gotcha .

You know what I had ? I Someone that I dated a long time ago . Her family would do these like sausage balls . Oh yeah , for Christmas morning . I just thought about like I have not had those in years , but they're so easy to make .

Jesse makes them , and then you get , if you get some jalapeno jelly , oh yeah , my girl , that on there , oh it's already .

Man , that sounds so good . We don't have any . We have no plans on Christmas Day . All of our things are Christmas Eve this year , so Christmas Day we're gonna drink or something , and just go out .

I'm going home , I don't know Moses and gummies will places be open ?

Yeah , yeah , last year we went to a movie theaters bottle blonde as soon as they open . I love bottle blonde . Yeah , I see that video that big fight over there . Bottle blonde not this one , though it was the Dallas one , right ? Yeah , it's a big-ass brawl . Yeah , that's funny .

Was it because they got their order wrong ?

Just a bunch of douches .

I wanted the pizza rolls no women at the bottle blonde it was just a bunch of dudes .

Just so many dudes on the group chat .

We always do breakfast tamales and breakfast casserole the breakfast tamales . Did you do it the way you did ?

it . Yeah , yeah , we fried up that it came out .

good , yeah , yeah by the way , those chickens Molly's , from one . They're good , they're delicious fantastic . Yeah , tell that lady , she's a wonderful cook .

Yeah , we fried we fried them up in the , in the skillet , just yeah , and that's also too . That's good . I didn't , we didn't know the salsa was coming with it . Have you all had ?

any tamales yet . No do you do tomorrow ? Is it all during Christmas or this time here ?

if I can go by them , I don't make them , I'm not my yeah .

I Mean I tried it one time . They were bad , but I tried .

I thought you uh , you were gonna like get the you know tomorrow's in a can for you .

Have you already had tamales in a can ?

No , that sounds like something I wouldn't eat out of the can .

We had some last week on the show and they were it tastes like Vienna sausages .

I'll go get them from roses . They have a pretty decent tamale .

No , go to Sonic or a good .

We did a taste test on the last week's episode we had five different shitty types of .

Tamales , go talk about it .

I'm gonna have the best . They were like brisket and they were bomb and they were smoking .

Yeah , they were real good .

They were good . It's crazy . I have nothing else on this episode .

What did you ask for for Christmas ?

I have a Amazon list , wish wish list that .

I just like yeah , so I constantly add stuff to it .

So I mean I have everything ranging from , like , some records that I wanted to An Oculus , one of those VR headsets .

Oh , if you get one , I'm coming over to play it .

Do ?

I saw I wanted for you , better clean it before you use it .

No , I wanted for the augmented reality . No , have you seen the augmented reality stuff ? Yeah , to where , like , people are literally cooking food why they have like . I have sex and I haven't seen that . But they have the recipe up like in a window but they can still see everything they're doing .

I want to do the one where you saw on a TikTok , where they're like Walking on like the beam . Oh and they're like no air , you know .

So whenever Chad used my VR headset like he , didn't you fall over .

Yeah , cuz it was the . It was the plane simulator .

I'm never sick .

I'm pretty good with like motion sickness and things like that . I'm pretty good wits about me . But like that airplane simulator thing fucked me up , so they hard .

But it wasn't .

They say I was about to get vertigo , like I literally felt , like I was my . My brain was about .

They say has nothing to do with the . It's not so much the motion and all that stuff , it's the refresh rate on the , the eye pieces .

Like you have to like , actually get into the airplane , touch the bright buttons and you ever started up . It's fucking you're going up and you're fine , but then you start looking sideways and then moving and like it's this , all this movement ? It is just too much . It's too much I . I realize I'd like to think that I could do anything and everything .

I think you could fly a plane in real life . I just don't think you could do this simulator . Okay , maybe not a jet , Maybe I can't get a jet there was a thing that said basically like 80% of men Believe that they could successfully land a aircraft in an emergency that I do think I can do .

I could fly one . I could not land it . We're all gonna die if I land it .

Well , you're not a man .

But I'm speaking from a woman . To tell you .

I think I do it , I think I would not even say that . We established you have that you have the largest dick out of everybody , so huge .

I can already tell you right now how Jordan's gonna do it . They're gonna be like okay , so go ahead and pull back a little bit , and she's like Nah .

Don't tell me what to do .

No , she's gonna get up and be like no , I don't want to do this anymore . It's enough to go over .

No , she will fucking put it down .

We're gonna die Is there anything that you think you like outside of , like landing the plane that you could do successfully .

I do think I could land a plane successfully .

I mean outside of that , like I believe you could as well as I think I could too .

I did a flight simulator at Southwest Airlines one time and I flew from Phoenix to San Diego in the snow and I landed just fine .

Okay , we said outside of landing plane , outside of landing plane , like anything else and in like , that's like the extreme that you think you could do . I think that I'm a pretty good shot . All right , so okay , cool . I was hoping that somebody would say that , yeah , I feel like I'm a pretty good shot .

I will kill the hostage and then also the other one .

Head . Their head is like basically like right next to hers . Yeah yeah , could you get that shot at like a hundred yards ?

Not me , absolutely not I don't .

I don't trust my hundred yards . I think anything under a hundred yards I could do the like 20 yards , you could do it . Oh , 100 , 20 yards you can yeah get a headshot in , yeah , like across the room with the pistol .

I think I could do that pretty well thinking a hundred yards I probably could with the with the right , right

This is how the movie movie would go . Kate would look at Jordan and she would close her eyes and she wouldn't know . She's like you're gonna kill me and I'm Accepting the fact that she's gonna die , and Jay's like I'm gonna kill you .

The words I'm a good shot but the question is like okay , now I take out the the bad , just the bad person , yeah now we're all sitting there like and you're having , we're having this discussion , what gates you know , whatever , While y'all are over there gaming coming up with a game plan , I'm gonna go ahead and take the shot .

And then I'll be dead like I got him she doesn't even acknowledge the fact that Kate's gone .

I got him . I welcome I can we go ?

I can see that , like we're all discussing , like okay , who's got the better shot ? And all of a sudden you hear a shot ring out and you look over at Jay's over here fucking already On the wall and great okay , cool Maybe not my sharpshooter badge .

So we're doing girls . No , I was a secadette .

No , no , you got to explain it now . It's a secadette .

It's like I don't know . It's like sponsored by the Navy or something like that . It's basically like oh .

Oh , not like a sea , like ocean . I thought it was like a sea , like you know , like cunt . Yes , jesus Christ , shit is this . I was a child .

Child cadets .

See for child .

So like it's , like . Boy Scouts , but it's like ROTC , but like not through schools not regulated for that , the only Regulated at all .

That's my ROTC . I love unregulated ROTC Like a fucking haze , a shit out of you . It's the best thing ever .

Like sponsored , everything like by the Navy , like our , everyone like how did you get involved in this ? Someone that my dad worked with his daughter also did it , and we were friends , and so I ended up doing it too . Good God , it was the best thing in my life .

Did you ?

love it . Yeah , I loved it . We had so many like freedoms and privileges . You know guns yeah , really , Kids guns . It was a great thing .

I love , like I said , I love unregulated ROTC .

Corey , our friend Corey . His wife was a secadette in Dallas see how is this so fun .

See , she loved it . It was . It's awesome , so sure you get to travel . I would like we stayed the night on one of the ships . It was .

It's cool , my brother did that civil air patrol thing ?

That's one of the same thing .

Yeah , I don't know why you brought that up . That's nothing , I mean .

I'm just like I'm trying to think like that's the only thing like I could reference to is like I know a guy in military . No , like , that's the only thing I can reference is like , like kids do , like the civil air patrol stuff , like you can be like 12 years old and go do that , okay .

No , but like we went to boot camp , I spent a week at the coast guard station and like went out on like the night raids with them night you were going Like night night vision goggles coming up from the water .

Jay , you're gonna be this may or may not be a drill . Just shoot the things we say to shoot .

They were trained to be fucking assassins , dude . We had to look through the water because we were in south podre and so that's where a lot of people like come over , oh my god you were assassins .

You were doing drug interdiction .

Every child labor law was broken , holy shit .

Well , technically it wasn't illegal because the ones that were doing the shooting Were all enough to go to jail .

I wonder if there's a phrase that will activate her . I don't want to try .

Excelsior .

So so Can't brought like it is cadet kelly .

And uh , have you seen hillary duff , that girl's Do you ?

What is she doing ? She's on some , she's on some royals . She's pregnant now . Really , yeah , she's got a dump . She got a dump . He like , oh my god , hitting the gym . I would hit the . Like leg day for days . It's the craziest thing .

Stop it . You know dog , like you wouldn't .

I wouldn't say it you always love us .

You could act . Came to the fight line .

I didn't think this was a real thing man .

What don't ?

I have some pictures , I'll show you some pictures .

Oh god , we were like on the news this one Bruters .

It's fun I can't wait to see the porcelain doll of yourself and then see cadet .

Shit , that's so scary .

All right , so um so we're saying hillary duff , yeah , hillary duff , I'll find a picture and show you .

I could tell from chad's face that he's , he found . He found a bikini pic .

No , I found a workout one . Yeah that's one of them . Okay , she got a dump All right .

So , um , hey , can you put it on the screen , because so sure they don't bring it back .

No , y'all are . Y'all are back After two months . Yes you're gonna be dropping episodes every .

Wednesday every Wednesday starting . Another episode will be out tomorrow tomorrow starting last week .

starting last week , all right , cool yeah .

And where can they find you ? Everywhere , everywhere .

Ever reckless podcast .

You got the new , you got that new domain name .

Yes , you can register for newsletter .

Oh , yeah , yeah , what so I went to forever reckless calm and it's coming soon .

Yeah , it has to you have the password .

I'm like no bitch , I don't pass where we don't . How come we don't ?

invite only bitch , but no , but I will uh open the website Um .

I want a newsletter chat . I want a newsletter .

I'm sorry I just I just looked at the chat and and and hui over here . I read it as every ccadet I shot , not shot with . I was like my god , fucking just killing people . All right , cool , all right anyways . So they can find you on all those streaming platforms . They can find you .

there the sex podcast . They're the sex podcast .

And uh , supposedly they're going to be um releasing the names of their significant others at some point , if not if we get to our Goal .

And I told you guys I will pay you guys five dollars after I get hobbyers . You have a card number .

For everyone .

But yeah , if we don't hit a thousand followers on social media which we suck at social media so we're probably not gonna hit it we do have to reveal the names of our People that we codenamed .

I don't think we said all of them , but we have the ones that I know , like we have sailor and what's the other codename ?

all american . There's one in the know , we know that but I'm talking about the current the .

You are the current . I know you're all american , but so tray and sailor .

Yeah , tray , sailor gi freshman .

Trash guy , Damn it's gonna get weird dumpster man .

How far away are y'all from it ?

Shit probably far .

And what's the timeline ?

We have to get it by new year's eve . All right , so you hear that nobody follow , nobody like .

Triple our current following in 11 days .

Nobody do any of that until after new year's .

All right , cory follow them on instagram because he said he just followed follow .

Cory , go ahead and remove that follow .

You're rolling we're trying to get this information out to the public .

Cory's such a great fucking Cory's . Cory's the man , he's the fucking great him and his wife are our fans and they got a wonderful little child and actually , as a matter of fact , I think the during the arts gogogers . They're like you don't got any merch for babies .

No , no baby merch . Yet we get some baby merch for you , I'll get you baby listeners .

Bro , like what are we supposed to do ?

with that Do not okay , Cory .

I was gonna see you some baby merch , but no more .

We got baby merch . We got baby merch . He said on it buddy unfollowed .

All right , well , thank y'all for coming on . This is fun , it's been . What a year .

She's never been on . Yeah , hobbyers house .

Yeah , and then y'all had an episode at his house we were on your episode .

Yeah , yeah .

Well , thank you for coming on . This is fun . Glad you are back . It was uh shitty two months without y'all doing your podcast .

I'm gonna honest with you .

I didn't listen to podcast nearly as much when y'all were gone .

So now I'm back on it . I'm gonna play . I gotta put y'all back in rotation now . Thank you , yeah .

So thank you all for joining us on youtube . We got a bunch of people here in the chat . We appreciate you . We would love the love . Thanks for hanging out with us on the first 30 .

Stay reckless .

Stay good , everybody . I'm chad . Merry Christmas .

And I'm tim and we are the .

Merry Christmas , merry Christmas , merry Christmas .