Hello the Internet, and welcome to Season to eighty five, episode two of Turns Guys. It's a production by Heart Radio, and it's a podcast where we take a deep bat into American share consciousness. And it's Tuesday, May second, twenty twenty three. And what's what is May second, twenty Tuesday?
Come on? You don't know me?
Come on man.
First of all, Subway tuna lovers unite. No, because this World Tuna Day, World Turtle Day. Nah, noat turtles out here, got your ass?
Miles admitted, I got your ass, he admitted. He turtles.
Also National Life Insurance Day, National Truffle Day. Like the chocolate, the good chocolates, I have the chocolate inside. National Teacher Appreciation Day, shout out all the teachers. Is National Foster Care Day.
Amazing.
It's Tuesday of the first full week in May. It's National Teacher Appreciation Day.
I'm going into my son's school a little later on for his to bring some cupcakes for his seventh birthday. And uh, I want to be rate his teachers, like I don't want to do what yourg No, that's not true. Wonderful wonderful teachers.
Yeah, I think last time I said this, I was like, who's your favorite teacher, and I always I'm gonna just I want to shout out Judy Clauson, my first music teacher, man good about making a good instrument boo.
Kathy McDonald, my seventh grade writing teacher, made me secretly sent a short story I wrote off to like a contest, and was like, you just want oh for real.
Like just pulled up on He was like, guess what asshole you want?
Yeah. It was really nice because the thing she was most into was I believe I can't remember if it's The Doobie Brothers or The Moody Blues, but she was real into one of those two bands. I hope agree that.
I thought uncol damn even justin in the chat, he said, well, my favorite teacher did that too. Shout out teachers too for like doing that thing where they they help you get confidence.
Yeah, like they're like you know what, I know they wouldn't.
Do this on their own.
Can I just come in real quick you shut out?
Yeah?
Yeah, shout out mister cart right.
Mister car my senior like creative writing teacher, he did the same thing with me. He noticed I was a C student and had me do some writing assignments that he didn't tell me he was going to submit, and most of them got accepted into this literary magazine.
And yeah, I was. I was. He proved to me I was good at writing.
Yeah, Yeah, shout shout out all the teachers out the right.
I'm going to aggressively say shout out to my mom because she's the best.
Take over the podcast, missus Ramos.
She's changed so many lives of so many kids who still keep in touch with her because she's.
Gotten them into college.
Help because she teaches Spanish, so she helps a lot of and she loves her native speakers because a lot of those kids are immigrant kids whose parents just do not have the eyes at home to take care of them and help them get into school, and have been.
Taught that they in this system cannot go to college.
So shout out to my.
Mom, and also about yeah, yeah, I don't think of any teachers who did anything that big. The only thing I could think of is when I was in second grade or sometime in elementary school, we were learning about the rainforest and you were supposed to write about You were supposed to write something from the perspective of your favorite rainforest animal. So I wrote from the perspective of the sloths, and my teacher really liked it, and so she It's one of those things I look back on
and I was like, man, that was weird. She had me go up and read it out loud to the ladies who worked at the front desk.
And he was just like, yeah, this is so cute.
It was really cute, but it was also like, I don't know if they were just and she was like, you guys got to hear this, like, did.
You read it? Did you read it super slow? I? Bet I am?
I bet I did. I'm sure I did some acting with it.
And that's how you knew you were built for the stage.
Yeah, that was where I really first knew I was a performer.
Sheer mention of appreciating teachers, and we completely exploded the opening of the show. All right, teachers deserve it, Yeah, hey, them more.
And now I'm going to do an ak that proves that I didn't deserve to write win any of those writing programs. I think she actually sent it to a third grade writing contest. In seventh grade, She's like, this kid really needs a w We're you gonna uh We're gonna let him get one here. Anyways, my name is Jack O'Brien aka huh Worm's got top hat, Richard Scary.
That is courtesy of my brain because I I heard that song in the grocery store yesterday voices Carrie from till Tuesday, which I always thought they said, this is scary, but it's just voices. Carrie really fucked me up when I found out it was voices Carrie well shot. Richard Scary speaking of teachers taught me everything Dick I needed to know about animals and what jobs they should do. Anyways, I'm thrilled to be joined as always by my co host, mister Miles Gras.
Yes it's Miles Gray aka Saint Miles Patrons Saints so of diapers that prevent the blowout, Okay, I was curious if there was a saint like I was holding my child and the farts sounds were so insane like they.
Were I thought.
I thought I was listening to like a like a Miami bassed concert, like in his back because it was rumbling and I was like, oh, I was like, this shit is a blowout and I knew and I put it down and when I revealed it had just reached the levees. Held ye to the patrons, the keeping the diarrhea in.
I said, what a great filling I meant feeling, but also filing, very fulfilling as well. Yeah, Page, since you were last on, Miles became incontinent. So we're Miles. We are thrilled to be joined in our third seat by a very funny comedian writer actor you know from such places as TV. Ever heard of it doing stand up acting? Heather's Corporate, one of the funniest comedies of the past decade. Corporate, which she also wrote for. Please welcome back to the show. It's Page.
Oh my god, it's me, uh, the sloth girl from earlier. Please call me that going forward.
Slot girl from earlier.
What's happening? I was in wait.
I'm just thinking about that thing where you had to read it to the people at the front desk. They had no association with slots or the rainforest or writing contest. They were just like, hey, why don't you just get this one off in front of them, Just fire it off.
You know. I wonder if there's a piece of the puzzle I'm missing that I just didn't understand at the time, But as far as my memory tells me, it was just she liked it and so she sent me up there to read it out loud.
Right. That was what we had before social media, and like videos of adorable kids, you just had to drag an adorable kid around and have them read their cute thing in front of that's true, like a traveling road show.
Yeah, I did have a teacher, I guess. I don't know if the teacher made me submit or like suggested that I submitted, But I did enter a writing contest where for those books American Diaries that were kind of like American Girl but like knock off. Yeah okay, and I did get honorable mention for that, which meant that we got to go to the local pizza restaurant.
Shit these Okay, I didn't. I was like, what the fuck are you talking about?
But I remember the cover of these books now yeah yeah yeah, yeah, okay.
Yeah yeah, And I still have my one that the author signed and she wrote, keep writing, and I.
Did, wow, wow looking all the way to the top.
I hope she'd be proud.
Are these like are they wildly problematic? Because when I look at it and I'm like, the tale of a Native girl.
Someone like, what the is this?
You know, it's hard to say. I haven't. I haven't reread in recent years, so I'm not sure.
Like ev Peach in Saint Louis in eighteen fifty seven, this Black Room, I'm like, what, what's what is this tale about? Are they always just kind of like did they did they ever tackle real issues?
Or were they just kind of right show out up by the bootstrep.
I'll be honest, I don't remember. This purple one is the one that I had. Agnes May Gleeson. There she is, that's the one. I think.
I just looks like she's from the nineteen nineth.
It looks kind of Lana del Rey asked.
Yeah, she's not. They didn't do much. They just took a yearbook photo and.
Put it like they photoshopped a prairie behind her.
Yeah. Oh man, I was. I was a big Hardy's boy Hardy Boys, sure fan, Okay, yeah the books.
I thought you were saying Hardy is the restaurant.
I was a big Hardy's boy. I did live in Hardy's Country. Yeah that was I had that instead of Carls Junior. But yeah, that like Hardy Boys books, and like I realized that at a certain point I didn't like them. I just like enjoyed the ritual or like it having all the Hardy Boy books, but like, oh, you're so boring and like uncool. They're like the thing about the Hardy Boys was like they really like their dad who's a cop. Oh really, and they're just like amateur cops.
I'm pretty sure that was what happened. Read read like hundreds of those fuckers.
Wow, propaganda from yeah Hardy Boys, and.
You ended up alright, So that's good. Your your mind held strong despite the old.
My brain was doing.
It was more about your love of collecting.
Yeah, that's rights I wanted.
I wanted my goosebumps to I wanted all of them. But my mom was like, if you don't read them, I won't even fu enter, Like you can get that ship at the library and then put it on your bushelf for a little bit. So truth be told, I only had about like eight of them because those only ones one that I liked reading, Like half the time I read them, and.
This fucking sucks. Just give up on it. But anyway, you guys read the Red Wall books. Speaking of Richard scary. They were like these little like fantasy books starring like mice and rodents.
Oh oh see, I know the cover. I remember these covers.
I can picture a lot of these books because my like high school job was working at the library, so I can like when you say it, I can like picture the covers. But I don't think I ever read them. As a kid, man, I was like, call the mouse Knights these mouse knight motherfuckers.
Yeah, yeah, you all would have heard of it and read it if it had been called mouse Knights, but instead they called it called red Wall.
As a kid, distracting from the bearing the lead, you know, yeah.
If they called it like knife mouse, I'd be like, what, let's.
Go excuse me, mom, I will purchase this one because there's.
One called salamandastron character. We'll steal the car and go to the local bookstore. All right, Page, we're gonna get to know you a little bit better in the moment. First, a couple of things we're talking about. We're going to talk about two ceremonies on either side of the pond. We're going to talk about King Charles big coronation coming up on Saturday. Now, you can participate and yes, now you can participate, you can get in on the action.
I still remember when we first heard that, like his coronation was gonna be held you know, eight months hence or something, and they were like, and he's really trying to make it like tasteful and democratic and taking cost of living into account. And I was like, oh, fuck, are they gonna do that? And what ridiculous? Where are they gonna suck it up? We have our answer, So we're gonna talk about that. We're gonna talk about how take a master sucking up this coronation. We're going to
talk about this. The theme of this year's Met Gala Carl Lagerfeld, baby boy, Carl. I guess the met Gala was last night. For those listening, we did not watch. We're in the past, so we don't know what. Yeah, all the amazing styles that were worn. So yeah, like there will be no spoilers here because we don't.
Yeah, mostly to talk about like I thought right right right when he passed away and was like, yeah, this guy was a giant guy, a real creep. Yeahright, like let's honor him.
Yeah, we'll talk about that. And also Adidas because they're being sued for having had some sense that Kanye was in a bad place and just didn't do shit about it. Kind of a lot, a lot of lot of lead time to come back cushion, kind of weird because they were created a little more. Yeah, anyways, all of that hard to quit it sometimes plenty more. But first page, we do like to ask our guests, what is something from your search history?
Okay, It's also be a good follow up because I think the last time I was on it was the day before the Taylor Swift eras tour tickets went on sale.
That's right, you were, didn't you have?
Like you were saying, like I got windows open, I'm fucking ready.
Wow, I was so naive. Then talk about recording something in the past, you know, like just to.
Give people the visual.
This is a little bit like talking to Matthew McConaughey, like in the future interview part of True Detective, you are smoking, chain smoking and drinking Budweiser out of its heavy I can't. Yeah.
What I'll say though, is just spoiler alert. I did get tickets, okay, but I did not get them during the sale, absolutely not. It was insane. I got them on Reddit dot com. Okay. I how followed a thread in the Taylor Swift subreddit where people were selling their tickets for face value, and I followed up repeatedly with the girl who had two tickets, and eventually I got them. I wasn't scammed, she was nice. So I have tickets
and I can't wait. And honestly, the thing now is that I am waiting as La is the last stop on the tour, so I'm, you know, watching as as it's happening all over as the tour has begun. And it occurred to me literally yesterday. I was like talking to my friend home going with Katie, and I was like thinking about it, and I was like, oh shit, are we going to park at Sofi Stadium? And I
googled Sofi Stadium parking. And I'm really proud of myself for going into it early because it's like still pretty reasonably priced and I have my parking spot three months in advance. So I googled Sofi Stadium parking.
So your last search history months ago maybe this was back in November, maybe six months ago was best seat so Sofi Stadium. Yeah, now now we're on Sofi Stadium like that of your search is surround. Like I was gonna say, stadium the best place to get a soft pretz.
I do feel like we're getting a you know, a skewed sample because we're we've you know this happened. We're just hitting you next time. My mom will have to be after the after the show. If I'm not just like a pile of dust on the ground, you know, if I can really get it together to recount my experience.
I don't turn to a pile of dust or force to be like.
Okay, I'm going to try to bage talk to me. You know, I'm looking forward to it for so many months, so I'm going to try to.
I don't sorry.
I played a weird sound drop where someone was saying, page talk to me, honey.
Why I did get distracted because I thought I heard something and then I was like I didn't hear anything. Let me just keep talking.
Yeah, sorry, I love that sound drop.
Yeah. I think.
Look, I'm really I'm the biggest thing that I'm sort of like my ears broked up. Was like people are selling them at face value?
Are they on Reddit? On the tailors?
Is that just like because they want to be honorable.
Because it's like actual fans who just had extra ticket. It's as opposed to people who bought them to resell them.
Yeah.
Yeah, wow, I wish sneakerheads did that. Shit, I got a pair of these new ones. Man, gotta be honest for the real fans.
Yeah, I mean it was. It's not like it's a lot of people or anything. But I just, you know, I got lucky.
What is something that you think is overrated?
Okay? I feel like I agree with you guys. We were talking before we started recording about how it's raining and we're tired of it. But I do think something that's overrated is summertime. I'm not looking forward. We've already had a few days where it's getting a little warmed, and I just think summer. I think I think we think we like summer because it's when we were off from school. Okay, but we're adults now and we don't have summer break. Okay unless we're teachers, which thanks them
so much, you know, National Teacher Day. Yeah, but summer sucks. I hate I hate it. I'm I much rather wouldn't. I I think, obviously, like anyone, we like spring, we like fall, we like when it's mild. But it's so much easier to just like put on a jacket than it is to like try to not have to have your ac running all day. Like it's just I hate the summer.
I get it, I get it. It's it's it's funny like when you say how it's tied to like childhood, right, because that was the time you felt the most you were untethered by school. You could fucking you know, drink from the hose and be outside all day and do
all that shit. Would you fuck with summer if like there was a I think it's weird because I really like the winter now because like everything does stop, like the industry does recognize, like hey man, for at least these two weeks when like we're not gonna do shit, right, And so because of that, I'm like, oh, I like this holiday now, maybe more like more so than summer.
And I wonder if I just if there was a way we could always be like hey man, we got to we gotta have that one or two weeks or just like it's summer baby, right.
Well, And also I think like we I can't help but think I have a bit of a skewed view because I live in southern California. Obviously winter is not that bad, right, but I just like, I feel like the reason I was thinking about this is I was like, I really got to take a moment to appreciate while it's spring right now, because in a few weeks and into you know, late in the summer, it's gonna be miserable. And I feel like I'm always like, at first, it's so nice, Oh the war, Oh it's warm again. Oh
the later's been so long? No, yeah, everything, it's miserable to be hot.
I was gonna say, the last time I was in a place that had seasons was New York City, and trying to think back on my memories, like all my good memories are from the summer. For some reason, I don't know. Yeah, yeah, I have.
Good things about summer.
You know.
I love a good barbecue. I love but you appreciate it like I do. Hold climate. When the sun comes out, we're funned over here. It's sunny most of the time anyway, so we're like, I don't know, what's the fucking more sun? And then people are like, what's wrong with you Californians. I'm like, we're fucking used to one note. Sorry, we're fucking summer.
Last summer was so bad, Like it was brutal.
But I really like your first point that, like I wonder how much of that was. That was at a time when I was just out of school and probably still had like some muscle memory or just you know, like my body, like all my life, I had learned to just like summer, now is time to be free, and so I just like go out and drink, like I didn't have work the next day, you stay out till five in the morning.
But yeah, more of these things in spring, more of these things you know right now, have a barbecue this weekend, you know what I mean? Like, why wait till it's.
Then hibernate for the summer, just pain in your air conditioned Dave, and then emerge for full Well.
That's the crazy thing is I can't even like remember doing anything in the winter and New York I think I must have like just mentally spiritual New York.
Oh man, did you skate? Like did you go to to an ice skating rink or anything like that? No?
No, I walked by the Rock Center of skating rink and then I was like, man, that ain't real ice.
I'm like I can't get down on that ship and I kept moving.
They made that ice. I don't know.
It has to be like I'm like, from playing hockey for so much in my life, I have to skate in a proper rink, you know, if they're not hitting that thing with a zam bony like let's let's let's let's keep it moving, you know, like God Stadium has like a weird skate rink and that thing is criminal. They did Ankle Turn City, Yeah, they did. Like they were doing like a winter festival and ship at Dodger Stadium. The last couple of years was.
Like, go to skating rinks, say like scoff and say you call that a skating rink and then leave.
Yeah, And I'm like, you know what, fucking give me a pair of size twelve and a half hockey hockey skates real quick, and then I starting then I start going backwards around these motherfuckers.
I'm like, what the fuck?
Way too aggressive. It's just like family, and you're like.
Yo, and my partner her majesty. The first time we went somewhere ice skating, I was like, Yo, can I do you mind if I just kind of like spread my wings a little bit. I haven't been on the ice in it. She's like, sure, go ahead. And the way my dumb ass was flying around the rink like car like cutting through like kids and shit, like one of the people's like, hey man, you really need to
slow down. Like I get you, you know how to skate, but like you don't need to be like hopping over three year olds and ship like this.
Is like yeah, moves the hazard.
Yeah yeah, yeah, Like it's a skating film or something adult skate, adult scale dog resist.
I get it. If I had that skill, I'd be the same way.
Yeah.
Yeah, insufferable. I mean I'm generally insufferable when I find something like, oh shit, here's a niche skill I have Now, I will just bore you to death with it.
It's like when you're like going the bounce house at a kid's birthday party and everyone's like wait, no, adults aren't supposed to be in there, and you're like yeah, yeah, sure, well then why do you have why is it so big? Then?
Yeah? Oh then how come I can do this back?
Are you okay?
You just fan kicked that kid in the head, Like Kyle from Street Fighter, What is something you think is underrated page.
I feel like I and maybe I'm wrong, but I feel like nobody has been talking about Next in Fashion on Netflix. I really liked that show.
Oh is that the when Tim Gunn is on?
No, this is with this is with Tan France and oh yeah, It's the second season came out a couple of months ago, and It's with Gigi had a different co host the first season, and it like got canceled at first, but then I guess they brought it back. And I just I always liked Project Runway, of course back in the day, and I haven't watched it forever, but I really liked bext and Fashion. I just thought all the designers were really interesting and it was just
like really fun to watch. And I don't want to spoil it, but like the person who won, I was like, this guy is incredible. This is exactly who I thought should win, you know, I.
Love, Yeah, I liked. I used to watch Project Runway like in the early Bravo days a lot, for sure, and then I actually did start. I watched the Hype on Netflix, which is like the streetwear version of it, where it like they find all these streetwear designers and like they they all like have a challenge. Ever, it's like the same structure except its streetwear, So maybe I will take a dip into Next in Fashions, I get out.
I I just I really thought it was fun, and I like, I had watched all of them except for the last one. And then I was visiting a friend and he was like, well, what do you do you want to watch thing? And I was like, would you watch the last episode of Next in Fashion with me? Like, I know you haven't seen it, but like and he and he was enthralled, and and I think that that speaks to how fun it is.
Yeah, Okay, I really liked it. What does it have over Project run I feel like that's the one that I'm familiar with and that I've watched like half Oh that new one, that new version with Tim Gunn is on Amazon.
I guess I can't say what it has over current day Project Runway because I haven't watched it in years.
But I just think, I I don't know. I feel like I was interested in all of the designers from the beginning, Like I liked all of them, and I thought the taste yeah, and I thought the the challenges were really interesting and they do like they do some men's wear and women's wear, and they just have like more interesting models and different like body types and ages and stuff too, and just the challenges are kind of
more interest staying. I guess, like they had one challenge where they had to make stuff out of plants, like they had to make clothes. Yeah, they just do cool stuff. And I do like Tan France and Gigi Hadid. I think they have a fun chemistry as hosts. And I always love remembering that has like a skater dude voice.
It's very so cal.
Yeah, she's like such a beautiful woman and then she's like like.
She shoh, bruh, she's sick leaves.
So I just like, I just it has a good prime.
That is the Hoodie's sister with a Coca Cola commercial days. I mean, like I keep bringing all these commercial questions and that, Yeah it is, yeah, And I don't know, I'm not buying the authenticity of her friend group just hanging out and having a Coca Cola and make king homemade.
Oh yes, I agree, now I can picture it.
Yeah with that kind of coke. Yeah, for sure. It's like just replace the Coca cola with cocaine and.
Right, another lump of Coca cola. Hey, keep me up, another sip of Coca cola.
Coca sorry, the cameras coca. Yeah.
I liked imagining too because she because she has like a pretty young child, and I was like imagining in the commercial. In the world of the commercial, she got like a babysitter so she could have all of her friends over to drink Coca cola.
Drink Coca cola and do some handmade pastas. Oh yeah, yeah, that sounds right like us normal people. All right, all right, let's take a quick break. We'll be right back to talk about other normal people like your king, my King, Charles Chuck ay. And we're back. And it's it's almost
that time. It is last night. Was that time for the American coronation the met Gala, Well we'll talk about that, but for for the UK, it's nearly time for the real the once in a generation, once every fucking century at this point, coronation King Charles long Leuck three, King.
Chuck ye three or Chuck ay yai yai, as I say, if poppy hey, shout out Poppy King fucking l ray Charles a ya yai Oh hey, my guy. But he's also today's winning entrant into the How far off base can I be when Reading the General Tone of Society sweepstakes.
Now this is, of course, we just need to reiterate being recorded before the met Gala. So there might be some really like strong competition in that category.
Could be some terribly off base. How we might have another winner for how far off base can I be in reading the General Tone of Society award winner we don't know. But in this instance, this week's winner is King Charles. So the coordination is happening on Saturday. And I guess, like in the past, when some inbred person's turn comes up to sit on the throne and wear the crown, there's a moment during the ceremony where all of the high born I don't know if that's the
word they use. I just know that from Game of Thrones, like other like nobles that are there like in the fucking building for it, they usually like bend the knee and shit and lick the royal loafers, and it's like a whole thing, like and I vow my allegiance to
you and your children and all that shit. So it's called the homage of peers apparently, and it's being scrapped for something a little more you know, of the times right now, and since everybody, since everybody is just about equality and inclusivity these days, I think Chuck must have had the thought that so many normies were just dying to maybe participate in this oath as well, because there was really just reserved for nobles, the nobility, and so
Saturday is their chance because there will no longer be an homage of peers, since it is being replaced with the homage of the people. Yes, that sounds really cool, right those people. What does that mean? Well, basically, there's gonna be a point in the ceremony where the Archbishop of Canterbury is going to invite all the hoboes watching at home pledge their allegiance to the new sovereign. Okay,
this is what he would say. This is the fucking oath that the arch or Archbishop of Canterbury is gonna be like, hey, y'all want to pitch in. Just read the text on the bottom of the screen. There's gonna be like a text crawl, I guess, and it's like a.
Little bouncing scepter so you can follow.
Yeah, for sure, it says, I swear that I will pay true allegiance to your majesty and to your heirs and successors according to law. So help me, God, Yo.
This is what they This is how they chose to democratize it.
This is so crazy. Every time I end up actually talking about the royal family and any capacity, I'm shocked by how much I don't understand or know about it. Like I'm like, I thought I didn't know anything about it, and then it's always like actually even less.
Yeah, like what homage homage?
It was like so many like four levels removed from any coherent version of reality that makes any sense to me.
So yeah, a lot of people were like this sounds like some like autocrat like authoritarian shit like that.
You want the people at home be like and iled my pledge, my allegiance to you and your blood, homie, and.
All your sperms, all your sperms are my god.
Like.
Yeah, they could like cut the palm of their hand and press it up to.
The Yeah, yes, scan this QR code on screen now for instructions on how to spill your blood for this.
But yeah, but this is like a real this was a real conversation as they're planning the coronation. They were like, there's a real cost of living problem in England. How are we going to like do this thing? That is the logic, Like doing a coronation that is not a celebration of inequality is like is a logical impossibility, Like that's a the cornation is a guy riding on like in a golden carriage through the streets, like while people are like not allowed to make eye contact with them.
It's there's no version of that. And they're like, no, we got it. We actually have the answer.
Yeah, I mean because on top of it all, like what's the crown he's gonna wear? Isn't it the most gaudy fucking thing?
All four gemstone, including solid gold garnets and sapphires, there's one of those. I don't even I don't even know what the fuck a garnet is, or is that gamut.
Some garnet like green or brown or something.
I'm just chill. The only garnet we recognize is Kevin. Yeah, but so I think the thing that's why he said green or brown.
I think I've looked this up before.
I don't know why. Uh.
Closely related minerals that form a gemstones. They're like gemstones, but like in every color red garnets have a long history. Whatever, Who gives a shit anyway, it's gonna be on his gold Burger king hat that he wears when he sits on the throne, and then all the poor people get
to do like boot liquor karaoke on TV. So I think, look, I'm no expert on English culture, but I definitely, I definitely know that this isn't something that the Maxixceps been clamoring for, especially when you consider how like few people even care about the monarchy, or how or like just how shit he is compared to like his mom, at least when it comes to like just genuinely being like liked regardless of what they represent, They're like, they're like, man,
they're not gonna come close to Elizabeth, So just just fucking just fall to the back. But again, in the announcement for it, the royal family sounds like they're patting themselves on the back for this. They said, this is in their announcement about the homage of the people quote a new and significant moment in the tradition of the coronation.
Never before in our history have the general public been offered an opportunity to join the national figures in declaring their allegiance to a new sovereign.
A true moment we'll all remember.
Yeah, man of the people like good Morning Britain or like they're one of their morning news shows. They just did like an informal poll on Twitter, like how many y'all doing this? Eighty five percent said fucked no, yeah, so whatever, you know, do what you gotta do.
But if the other people were like, wait, what is that.
Like huh homage of the Yeah, you all say you're not gonna do it. When you get the opportunity to ye kneel before your television.
You're gonna say, and you'll with tears in your eyes streaming down your face. I swear that I will pay true allegiance to your majesty and to your airs and successors, according.
To Lass will help me God. Okay, your heart. I'm curious now that's America, man, okay, hey come on, yeah, hey.
Man, hey, and to the Republic for which it stands all right, But I just wonder if this is because like all these out of touch wealthy people hang out Like Charles saw this as like how Elon made it so any asshole could get a blue check mark.
Like he's like, you know, what'd be cool if we open it up.
To all all my SIKA fans and then like maybe that'll be a good way to kind of like help people feel involved or something. But right now, like when asked for a comment, it seemed like the only thing that's come back is like a clarification where the Royal fans are like.
You guys.
It wasn't like I was like that serious about it. It was like expecting people to do it. They're more like, it's just merely an invitation. There's no expectation to participate. It's just if you want, if you want to, you can't.
It's just there on the screen. If you just want, that's yeah.
If you want, if you want, it's there, that's all. Hey, we're just gonna leave this here. You kids, do whatever you want, but do whatever you want. I don't know the greatest stories ever told in it the law if not up to you, up to you, up to you, up to your call.
Did they still do pledge of allegiance in schools? That just occurred to me.
I don't I think so. I don't think they do it my kids school, but they definitely do. I mean I remember doing it high school.
Yeah, I in high school. I didn't stand up during it. I would just sit down.
Hell yeah, damn.
I was like, I'm not required to do this.
They would have kicked me out of school if I did that. Should I think we had to say that our father. When I was in Catholic school, Oh yeah, I went to Yeah.
Man, the way I mumbled through like hail Mary's and ship the only hill Mary was by Tupac And I was like.
Yeah, I mean I was in a public school. I think they were like, yeah, we don't really, we're not gonna.
We're not there yet, give us another twenty years.
And I remember in my in my elementary school, we had to salute the Christian flag.
I didn't know Christians had a flag.
It's like I pledge allegiance.
I forget.
It was to the Christian flag and to the Savior for whose kingdom it stands? What?
Yes, that sounds like a like they weird alp that. Yeah, that sounds like they were just like, oh yeah.
America sounds like a kingdom.
It stands like Christian flag pledge. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, it's hold on right here. It is this is to this as Kingdom stands. Oh well, this is this is one version one brotherhood, uniting all Christians in service and in love.
Damn. It was something that was a Catholic school. No, this is at a Lutheran school I went to. Okay, yeah, I was gonna say, Catholic. Can't get away with that ship.
No, no, no. They were too busy being like, you're gonna go to Hell, bitch, and I was like, oh my god.
But also everyone was like convinced that papists were going to take over the country in the early twentieth century.
So oh, they're nothing to do with immigration demographics, I'm sure.
No, no, no, no, nothing that well, speaking of both King Charles and Taylor Swift, Ticketmaster the Royal. The Royals put Ticketmaster in charge of distributing tickets to his coronation, which I just always assumed that that was just a thing where like they were glad if people showed up and everyone just kind of made their way into the streets. But no, you have to get tickets.
Does it cost money?
Oh yeah it does, but I think so, I don't know.
They also like pay we're all like, I don't know.
I literally I no lessons here they pay.
For all of this with taxes like the States.
Wait, so Lionel Richie's fucking talent fee is coming out of the taxes.
Yes, Lionel Richie, Katy Perry Andrea of Shelley. Wow. And you know Katie Perry doesn't go small on these things.
So oh no, she's gonna come out on a giant fucking mechanical lion or some shit.
Yes, which honestly I'd love to see it.
Yeah, that would be a man appropriate.
So you know, when it got down to people who were not like part of the inbred aristocracy, there were twenty thousand spots left up for grabs to be distributed based on the geographical spread of the UK population, not on a first come, first surf basis. So just really trying to like make it egalitarian in some way. That like just a misguided attempt to be a man of the people, by the least of the people, man of
all time. And then fans got so some fans got an email congratulating them for winning the opportunity to grab tickets. But if you didn't, if you thought that that meant you had the tickets you were wrong. Ticketmaster would basically tell you were out of luck because this was the second round of tickets and they weren't guaranteed. So the congratulations was just like, congratulations, you now have the opportunity to buy these tickets if you act fast. Wow.
Yeah, it's so the concert happens like on the second day of the coronation celebrations. So there's the thing where you'll sell it. You can scream at your TV and you know, pledge your fealty to his sperm.
I would die for you, sir, That's all I'm going to be screwing tears.
God, I felt it didn't go far enough.
It didn't encapsure my true allegiance to you.
You're a highness. But yeah, so then this like then there's this concert that has everybody out there, you know, turning up on the east lawn of Windsor Castle. Oh yeah, first time it's been held in the grounds. See that's that's probably how they're like, see, and we're gonna let dirty fucking people from charities onto the premises for a concert.
Gross, not my monarchy.
I'm still really stuck on Katy Perry performing at this dude, there's a ton I choose who I've.
Told on there. So we talked we actually covered this, we should say say that we covered the fact that this is by no means the a team. This is who would agree to do this at a time when everybody generally agrees that the Royals are like a bad institution. So like, so this is Elton, John Dua Lipa. What's the redheaded guy's name? They all ed Sharon, They all turned it down. Harry was like ice girls, they all said, spice girls. Said no, yes, spice girls.
Yep. People of the world your life, I know. And apparently so and that leaves us with Katie Perry, lionel Rich motherfucking uh, they said, oh, rumored to travel Bette Midler from the US, bringing her stinking ass over from the US.
I mean all of these people are you are US performers? Like that's the thing, Like.
Australian are British?
Yo?
You know what's woll Steve Winwood rock guitarist Steve Winwood and Nicole Shirt, singer of the Pussycat Dolls.
Aren't these all Americans?
That takes times?
WHOA, Yeah, I don't think Nicole Shirt singer is English. Steve Winwood, Okay, yeah, we get it.
You know, Orlando Bloom is British, but says okay, thanks so much.
So Katie Perry gets it by relation.
She's like, yeah, so Orlando was like, go for it, bab.
I understand the significance of this, and that's why I'm riding a giant mechanical lion onto the east lawn of Windsor.
I kissed a girl and I liked it. For his coronations cremony, I.
I liked it.
Shit, all right, well, shit, this is gonna be something I won't pay any attention to, probably, although I don't know who knows. When there's the royal wedding, I think we didn't pay per Yeah, I think I paid attention to that the last one. But that was because it was an American who was getting married into the royal family. I was I was expecting some King Ralph hijinks. Oh yeah, yeah, of course of course. And also we were up at three in the morning because we had a newborn. So
you can look forward to that. Miles. You will be watching this whether you like it or not.
Actually, the only thing you know what, actually the geist child has been sleeping through the night. So wow, days in a row on the fucking sam. Okay, yeah, I'm ready for any regressions, but that part of my life is behind me for only maybe six more seconds and then I'll be right back with backs under my eyes.
All right, let's take a quick break, we'll come back. We'll talk about America's disgusting display of privilege the Mecala, and we're back, and yeah, it's our time. It's it's time for the US to do their Metropolitan Gala. I don't know the full word. Galla is probably the full word the gala. It's that time celebrities wear out.
In the gay lavish party.
Yes, there it is. The Metropolitan gallivanting has to be gone. Somebody needs to go and scream that. At the beginning the opening ceremonies.
Oh, like a crier comes out.
Yeah, the galivanting comments, the Metropolitan gallivanting. The theme of this year's event is, which is always my favorite thing, is like you know, they give feels like a random theme is chosen, Like, wasn't one of them, like the papers, it wasn't one of them. Yeah one was.
Yeah, because I remember when Rihanna pulled up and I remember we called that that episode pontiflex, Yeah, because it was she she was stutting on him with her like religious garb.
But this year they just like did one that was just a designer who just dialed and died. Carl Lagerfeld, Yeah, who I recognize when I see a picture of him because he has like that collar that looks like a neck brace. It's like so big.
Yeah, And and he's got slicked back hair, which you know, that's how you know he's a piece of shit with a punchail.
Slick back.
Wayne always walk fingerless leather gloves too. You're like, this dude's this dude, he looks like a fucking villain.
He is some of the strongest collars and cuffs in the dress shirt game. That was the only thing that I took away from him. But he also seemed like just like a mean guy, even like at his peak when he was famous, and then when he died, everyone was like, oh my god, this guy was a piece of shit. He was so problematic. So let's see where should we start.
Okay, didn't you even claim it was like a character he was doing or something.
Sure, Yeah, I'm sure he did. Let's go with that during the me too movement, he said, if you don't want your pants pulled about, don't become a model, join a nunnery. There will always be a place for you, the convent.
The only two options.
Exactly, Wow, pants pulled about? Yeah.
And then you follow that up with like when the me too things are happening, and he's like just trying to throw water on it, because he was quote fed up with all the me too nonsense, he said, quote what shocks me most in all of this are the starlets who have taken twenty years to remember what happened, not to mention the fact that there are no prosecution witnesses. Oh boy, Carl, okay, Carl, what else?
So it probably ends there, right? Surely he didn't weigh in on the Holocaust. What no, no, He said of
Germany's decision to open their borders to refugees. One cannot, even if there are decades between them, kill millions of Jews so you can bring millions of their worst enemies in their place, which I don't even know what he's saying there necessarily, but he did follow that up by saying that a friend of his who took in a Syrian refugee told him that the great greatest thing Germany invented was the Holocaust, but it was his friend who he made up who said that, not him. So why even Wrention.
That unless you think that's a point you're trying to get, like that's a take you need to get out there though, because he's a moss refugee even said like, what is he trying to say? Is that him being like, yeah, it's very unclear. It seems like he thinks what he's trying to say is important.
Yeah, I'm pretty sure. It seems like he doesn't think the Holocaust was that bad.
It sounds like he's like, I don't know. This guy says it's pretty cool. Yeah, what do we say to that person?
Then? Huh? Okay. Sure organizers are defending the theme because they want to focus on the work rather than the words or the man. The words or the man.
Although people are going, okay, whatever is someone going to dress like him?
You'd imagine or only going to do that because everyone's going, I don't know.
I guess it's possible that people are who are going, well, somehow try to go but also somehow make a statement with whatever I feel like I just don't understand how fashion works. But I know you're like not supposed to say no if you get invited to the met Gala, right, Like it's like you have to go, right.
Yeah, it'll it'll fuck your life up. Yeah if you don't, it's it's like so sought after. I remember when I was working at when I was working at Conde Nast, like at like Vogue, they were trying to do a seventy three questions like this video series with a z'son.
Sorry to be in it? All right? Can I talk about that later?
But anyway, his whole thing was he's like, I'll do it if you can get me into the met Gala. Like the only reason he's like I want to.
Like I want to go so bad, dude, I want to be there. Give me something.
So the whole the whole exchange was like we had to go to the magazine and be like, Yo, can you get this guy tickets? And like they were like.
Did they?
Yeah, I'm pretty sure it did, because I mean he showed up to set and I was like, and all the mumblings are like he's the only doing this for Metgala tickets, And I.
Was like Wow, Wow, what the theme was that year.
I think it's just uh yeah, who knows, who knows?
Oh, Becca saying because like Beyonce says she's not gonna go. But that's because Beyonce doesn't need it. It's like a lot of people. It's a lot of exposure or whatever.
Right sure, sure of course it's like because it just shows you're like, oh, I've been accepted into this this world of the met Gala.
It's also very presumptuous of how good your fit is going to be that you think it's going to be that dise isn't sorry, assumes that people are gonna be like, oh my god, is these what are you wearing?
I think like everyone will remember yeah right right right, or just to be able to tell somebody's like, yeah I got tickets, Bromm going, what are you gonna wear?
I don't know, man.
I think that's like, well suit I got, yeah, should be fine.
I think were these basketball shorts?
I do love when people go and they just like whatever they wear is so boring, has no relevance, right right right, it's kind of bold. I kind of like, wasn't it.
One of the more recent ones, was wasn't that when AOC wrote Where to Eat the Rich Dress. Yeah, yeah, that was like I was just thinking of how you know they it comes for all of us, you know, at some point.
I'm looking at collar Carl Lagerfeld's like outfits that he designed, and it's really like a bunch of giant Like the thing about him having like a giant collar seems to be his main thing, Like.
It's a normal sized collar, new angle, find a new ankle.
Like one of the most iconic is a woman like wearing a you know, very very nice outfit with a giant bow tie, like a comically sized bow tie around her neck. So maybe that's just his thing, is like giant neck where which I can get behind.
That's that's that's how he described nooses. I think in an interview too.
Where my friend who just the one who took in the Syrian immigrant was recently saying that what were nooses but the first.
The giant neckwear, And I think that's why I'm playing with it with this with my next collection. But yeah, so they're focusing on the work rather than the words or the man.
Throwing into that category is presumably his two thousand and five Diet book, because He was one of the most fat shaming, anti like plus sized, anti healthy acceptance, anti healthy brain and body.
He caped for toxic beauty standards.
Yeah, the Carl Lagerfeld diet, which consisted of low calorie meals and plenty of diet coke. Huh okay, it's by I like how the HEAs like.
It says that the Karl Lagerfeld diet with doctor Jean Claude Oudre like what this doctor was like, Yeah, yeah, yeah, this is good, this works. That works for me, it says. His regimen, called the spoon Light program, involved a very low fat, very low calorie diet plenty die coke. The designers favored fish or yeah, the designer favored fish, lean meat, fruit, skim milk, and vegetables and avoided alcohol, cream, sugar, and
other carbs. That meant bread, pasta, most cheese, and red meat were banned.
Okay.
And then when super fun to hang out with, like just guy to go to dinner with, you know, it just sounds cool.
He would be like the kind of person where you order and they start scoffing. Yea es, so I have a salad like this, Okay, a caesar or so and then I'm gonna have the sea bass.
His diet was purely for a quote appearance only. He called fashion the healthiest motivation for losing weight and believed that diets should be a sort of punishment. So this guy gets it. He's I'm glad that he was advising people the exact opposite of what is actually healthy.
Yeah, so yeah, we've this is this is a really interesting way to articulate how to actually do harm to yourself. It's it's wild how just all like these the toxicity of like these beauty standards, Like it's just rampant.
Again. Another thing I heard at Vogue where.
I forget what the fuck Like people couldn't eat at certain shoots, Like they wouldn't have food for crew at certain shoots, like if it was like a fashion shoot. Yeah, because they're like, no, we don't need to have food here right now. And you'd hear like these things that people say like nothing tastes as good as how skinny feels.
Yeah.
Yeah, I was like, and then people would regurgitate that and be like that's the thing, And I'm like, what the fuck is wrong with all your All.
Other advice you can find in the book is chewing food and spitting it out, which is what a neating disorder thing like, that's the thing that they.
Yeah, anyway, so cool, So let's focus on the man. That's not the not the man or the words or.
The takes, the callers, or the boding the met Gala two.
Isn't it like rumored that the food is terrible? Have you guys?
He oh mate, I'd believe it. Talk about a room full of people who probably aren't like just reading like the excerpts from his book. Yeah, not so much a priority unless you want to fuck your life up.
I just get blood transfusion from teenagers who have eaten and that that's where I get my nut blood. Give me that, young.
I like this sort of theme of blood oaths in this episode.
Y yeah, that should have been the theme of this year. Is mcgalaugh's blood?
No, I guess not well. Page as always such a pleasure having you on the daily. I'd like to be here. Where can people find you? Follow you all that good stuff?
You can find me on Instagram at page Weldon. You can check out I just had a set on Don't Tell Comedies YouTube channel that I am proud of, and they have a couple of clip up of me, share those.
Please link off to that.
Yeah, and yeah, I guess Instagram and Twitter, and I'm on TikTok as well at page Welden comedy because a teenager who hasn't posted in years has at Page Weldon.
But yeah, let's find that Page Weldon. I know, see, what the fuck do you want? Page? You're sitting on this handle, You're not doing shit with it?
Come back? Yeah?
Does she have likes? Does she like things?
Or I haven't loaded since I downloaded TikTok and first discovered this.
But I hope you're listening real page Weldon because we're big mad at.
You fake Page Weldon in my book. Yeah, hey, the real page Weldon. Is there a work of media that you've been enjoying?
Okay? Yeah, so I was thinking about I feel like you guys always do a tweet, but I just don't really look at Twitter anymore. I'm more of a TikTok gal. And I was thinking about with the met Gala coming, there is this account that I really like. It's this Australian guy who's a he's a designer and he posts stuff about his you know, designs and stuff too but what I really love is whenever he'll post a video with his mom, he does videos with his dad too.
His name's I'm sure I'm pronouncing it wrong aton E, I t a n last name bode b o u d E. And he posts these videos where he has his mom rate red carpet looks, and in particular he has a series where he does met Gal has her rate met Gala looks and she is hilarious and I'm I'm going to send you the one where they're rating gghaddids met Gala looks. Okay, I just find her so delightful.
I don't know if you can play this so we can all see it when they say head did because they're Australian DIDs, met Gala outs.
Is she the model? Yes, the pretty one, Yes, very descriptive. Okay.
This is twenty fifteen. The theme was China through the looking Glass and doing Diana von Furstenberg.
Well that's a little bit ordinary. Don't you think it's not terrible? It's just a bit average. I'd give it a four.
Okay.
This is twenty sixteen. The themes Fashion in an Age of Technology, and she's wearing Tommy Hill figure.
Okay, it's very ordinary. What's next to her? That man? What's he got on his own?
That's insane, that's insane saying from one direction, Oh hello.
Hello, oh hello to the gentleman with the metal arms.
Okay, she is vicious.
She gives everything like a four. And what I love about he has like a whole playlist of her rating mcgala looks and stuff, And what I love about them is no matter what you think, like once you've watched a few and you think you get her taste, you don't. She is like such a surprise. Her main her only consistent thing is that she hates beige. She hates when people wear beige. Yeah, she thinks. I'm watching people out you know, and I think she's kind of right, truth be told.
I'm looking at the outfits as they get like progressively less ordinary. Does she keep going? Does she keep being like it's a little ordinary biking?
Wait? Can I get you to just play like the first three seconds of the one where they do bellaheaded I'm saying yes right now, Okay.
I'm going to get you to write all of bellads mechal outfits haven't ready?
No we did?
Did?
Are they related? The sisters. Wow, in the same industry.
Yeah, the same industry. Good for them. Oh hello, Zane, Hello favorite?
Yeah okay, yeah. She always says like people didn't get the memo about the beige. Anyway, if you want to lose some time on TikTok, just scroll through that playlist. Oh yeah, so this guy's a designer who I believe you can buy is close.
Also, you know what I found? Paige Weldon been posting at page weld.
She's been posting recently though.
Yeah, for two dred and seventeen plays on this. I don't know what this is.
So this is from twenty sixteen. Oh oh so it's just back when TikTok was like literally just lip syncing.
Like when it was musically Yeah, yeah, yeah, okay.
Good for you.
It's a delete her account.
Yeah, delete this page. We're gonna find you and ask you very nicely to just move on exactly.
We just want to talk Miles. Where can people find you? Is their working media you've been enjoying?
Oh?
Find me? I mean you can find me at Miles and grade Twitter. You know, I look sometimes, but again, ever since I hadn't looked at it for like many weeks straight, I don't.
I'm not. I'm not looking there as much off and even on the Instagram. Man, I'm fucking I'm fucking up.
I'm old.
Man. You know I'm looking at my baby all the time.
What can I say? What can I say? Find me at miles of grade though.
What can I say? I'm a wonderful father, like.
I say, I'm daddy.
Now you know what's wild?
I'm I'm pretty sure, Jack, next time you see me, I'm only gonna be wearing cargo pants. Yeah, I'm like stepping into the dad. Like any pockets you can carry a baby monitor in, Like, oh yeah, but like I keep a baby monitor one pocket I got. I got pacifiers on me. I'm fucking ready, okay, and technical fabrics because the spit up will just glide right off rather than stain.
Yeah.
Find us also on our basketball podcast, Miles and Jack Got Mad Boosty. This is gonna be a fantastic episode coming up with all the wonderful results in the NBA. And then if you want to hear me talk about Love is Blind and other reality shows, Super High with Sophia Alexander, check out for twenty de fiance. I don't have any social.
Media things I've looked at. So I'll just.
Say, go go go, go shout out a teacher, you know what I mean. If you can't do that, do that on social media on social media, because you know, all of our teachers as to media is the ones that were teaching in the nineties, God bless them.
Uh tweet I've been enjoying big Boy online at I do not bleed tweeted. When a bird is walking around on its little bird legs, it's mocking you. It's saying this is you, this is what you look like.
Just hopping around.
You know the thing about birds, how they're like their heads bob when they're walking, because like I think it's like attached to the muscles and their legs.
Oh really, I have a fuck they're.
Dinosaurs and I don't know they're creepy. Ask.
Yeah. You can find me on Twitter at Jack Underscore Brian. You can find us on Twitter at Daily Zekeeist. We're at the Daily Zekeeist on Instagram. We have Facebook fampage on website daily zeikeist dot com, or we post our episodes and our footnotes where we link off to the information that we talked about in today's episode.
Well, was a song that.
We think you might enjoy? My good song? Do you think people might enjoy?
Uh? There's okay. I think last time we went off on a track from Always Proper, I want to do another one from this album. It's called tak Yo ass Off and it's a little more like This one's more like a bit of a housey track, which is dope again all that this whole like Lafomelia, like the stuff I've been hearing is really it's fun and it's I like when it's just like a collective of artists who
just kind of get together and put stuff together. So this one is talk Yo ass Off by Always Proper okay on the lat Amelia Part one out check it out.
You can find that the foot notes. The Daily Guy is the production of my Heart Radio for more podcasts, or my Heart Radio is Daheart Radio, arap Apple podcast or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.
That's gonna do.
It for us this morning, back tomorrow with a who last episode of the show and we'll talk to you then. Bye bye bye.