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The Crate and Crowbar

The Crate and Crowbarcrateandcrowbar.com
A group of friends who work in the games industry meet up once a week to talk about PC games over a drink. “Off-the-cuff” is a polite way to say “unprofessional”, right?

Episodes

Episode 322: I’ve Seen A Racoon-Man So I’ve Had A Good Time Tonight

Tom S, Chris and Marsh lay themselves bare to discuss the Xbox showcase, sample the tasty-tasty-tasty open world comfort food of Middle-Earth: Shadow of War, unspool tubes in Filament and eye-roll at time-gribblies in Close to the Sun. The XBOX XERIEX X is coming and, if anyone notices, they will be able to play some [...]

May 08, 20202 hr 56 min

Animal Crossing: Yep, Still Locked In At The Crate and Crowbar

More Animal Crossing with Pip and Chris! We talk island design, the pleasures and pitfalls of meeting your inexplicably naked heroes, put Blathers on trial for art crime, and consider the ups and downs of multiplayer island life. You can find this bonus episode on YouTube, and our intro music is, as ever, Clambake by [...]

May 03, 20202 hr 44 min

Episode 321: Free Violence, All The Time

Alex, Tom F and Graham e-gather to e-give their e-takes on the Assassin’s Creed reveal, get kicked right in the breach phase, courtesy of XCOM: Chimera Squad, and amp up the wide-men of Gears Tactics. Assassin’s Creed Valhalla has been announced. Watch the Vikings raid and pillage – but in a good way – in [...]

May 01, 20202 hr 58 min

Episode 320: Snek Ops

Tom S, Chris and Marsh evade the Gull Squad to bring you takes on the trousers of tactics spin-off XCOM: Chimera Squad, tubestation construction sim StationFlow and kraken-based illusory-victory machine Magic: The Gathering Arena. This isn’t relevant to show, but I think it’s important to say at the top of this that Tom would absolutely [...]

Apr 24, 20202 hr 37 min

Episode 319: A Good Clean Drowning

Tom F and Marsh are joined by the mellifluous voice of Graham Smith to have weird wives in Sigma Theory, poke fingers into Half-Life: Alyx’s fungal bird beaks and enjoy Valorant in the brief twilight that heralds our inevitable obsolescence. A new game from Firaxis comes out next week! It’s XCOM: Chimera Squad, aka Tactical [...]

Apr 17, 20202 hr 12 min

Episode 318: Manipulated By The Baby Owl

Alex, Chris and both Toms (!) reach across timezones to discuss sunny getaways in Hitman 2, fraught getaways in Ori and the Will of the Wisps, and more. I’m going to be honest with you. It was very hot in my office when we recorded this episode, so I opened the window a crack. I [...]

Apr 10, 20202 hr 56 min

Animal Crossing: Still Locked In At The Crate and Crowbar

Hello! Again! We’ve done another one of these! Chris and Pip cross the egg event horizon as they check in on island life, two weeks later. You can find this bonus episode on YouTube, if you like. As ever, our intro music is Clambake by The Mandibles. Some show notes! Here’s the website that lets [...]

Apr 07, 20201 hr 16 min

Episode 317: Khaki Avengers

Alex, Marsh, Chris and Tom Senior discuss the most topical games of the age, including but not limited to The Room VR, Call of Duty for some reason, hunting in Red Dead 2, and Mount & Blade: Bannerlord. We’re still getting used to this new remote recording setup, and we’ll be looking to invest in [...]

Apr 03, 20202 hr 52 min

Episode 316: Procedural Up The Bajacksie

Marsh, Chris and Alex attempt our first remote pod to discuss AI-augmented game development and the various verbs of Doom Eternal. This is a shorter pod than usual as we get used to a new way of recording – but we’re going to do our best to continue to deliver hot pods every week. We [...]

Mar 27, 20201 hr 13 min

Animal Crossing: New Horizons: A Lock-In At The Crate and Crowbar

Hello! In this special mini-pod, Pip and Chris share their experiences of Animal Crossing: New Horizons while playing Animal Crossing: New Horizons. No spoilers, unless you didn’t know about the time that Chris killed his husband and fled to an island retreat with the family silver. Things are tough all over, and so we thought [...]

Mar 22, 20201 hr 1 min

Episode 315: Thanks, Bearnaldo

Chris, Marsh and a moth get drippy then descend into the underworld of Iris And The Giant, adjudicate on the latest Destiny drama and order a 14-inch stuffed-crust Warzone. The crust is stuffed with guns. Bane of trans-pacific trade and the NBA: Geoff Keighley. Wash your hands to be spared his wrath. Alan Hazelden has [...]

Mar 13, 20202 hr

Episode 314: Nostalgic Roundabout

Chris and Alex discuss some actual games news and bury themselves kneck-deep in Dark Future and World of Horror – just in time for a special report from salty ocean correspondent Pip! Plus: voice controls, work-life balance, the hot panic of an embarassing gaming moment, our go-to grunts, and other emanations from this bumper episode [...]

Mar 06, 20202 hr 7 min

Episode 313: Stuck In The Muck

Alex, Chris and Marsh endure the first episode of Mythic Quest: Raven’s Banquet, but only barely, punch towers with mechadongs in Besiege, beat bad bots in resuscitated coop shooter Generation Zero and get bandy-legged in The Suicide of Rachael Foster. “It’s a real Bront.” We sat stony-faced through videogame-dev-set sitcom Mythic Quest: Raven’s Banquet but [...]

Feb 28, 20202 hr 3 min

Episode 312: Don’t Spaff Your Jargs

Alex and Marsh grudgingly drag themselves from the swamp to chat about spry roguelike platformer ScourgeBringer, palpate the unctuous parts of The Good Time Garden and feel ways about things in plangent poke-a-story Florence. Gentle nature-walk / insect stridulation simulator, Hunt: Showdown now has a PvE onboarding tutorial for new players. That’s nice! Red Dead [...]

Feb 21, 20201 hr 13 min

Episode 311: Appreciate me, Hunt-Daddy!

Alex, Chris and Marsh bear witness to the spherical design crimes of Battlefront II, sweat bricks in formidable hell-Tetris game, Schwerkraftprojektionsgerät, and return to their happy place, the cursed murder-swamp of Hunt: Showdown. No one needs to own this many maglites. GeForce Now game streaming thing is out… now! But what is it and why [...]

Feb 07, 20203 hr 30 min

Episode 310: Always The Ball, Never The Paddle

Tom S, Chris and Marsh seek the Creature in the Well, guiltily juggle men in Dynasty Warriors 8, revisit the roots of the RTS in Warcraft 3: Reforged, crave decapitation in Mordau and assess the early access jank of Warhammer Underworlds: Online. “Stay off the tracks.” What’s that emerging from the frigid tundra of January? [...]

Jan 31, 20202 hr 37 min

Episode 309: The Meta-Porridge Cascade Scenario

Alex and Marsh take a jaunty journey into the depths of Hades and wander the Streets of Rogue. The RNs are very much G’d, gorillas freed and the roguelikes liked, to varying degrees. Also: patch note heresies and our favourite offal. The Half-Lifes… Half-Lives?… They’re freeeee! Some of the Half-Life: Alyx team answered questions on [...]

Jan 24, 20201 hr 28 min

Episode 308: What Happened To Sonic Dogs?

Tom, Chris and Marsh gather to reopen Black Mesa’s final chapters, vie to become the ultimate Tom in Slay The Spire, hoover up all the flavour text in Pillars of Eternity: Deadfire and ride the rhythm of Sayonara Wild Hearts. Let’s put this at the top: this year’s C&C Community GOTY is now online! Go [...]

Jan 17, 20202 hr 14 min

Episode 307: Walloping Heidis

It’s the end of the year! Pip, Marsh, Alex, Chris and a hologram of Tom Francis gather on a big sofa to discuss their favourite games of the year. Featuring Sekiro, Baba is You, Red Dead Redemption 2, Disco Elysium, Outer Wilds and more! This’ll be our last podcast of the year – we’ll be [...]

Dec 21, 20193 hr 34 min

Episode 306: They’re All A Skeleton’s Uncle, At The End Of The Day

Alex and Chris discuss Resident Evil 3 and Twin Peaks VR before setting a course straight for the heart of men-in-helmets-land: Phoenix Point, Halo: Reach, and a little Destiny 2: Season of Dawn. Also featuring: the true pillars of any hero’s journey, the retroactive bigtown crisis, the vital importance of denying yourself the dream gnome, [...]

Dec 13, 20192 hr

Episode 305: Tom Clancy’s Questions From Questions

Tom, Marsh and two-thirds of a bottle of whiskey consider the fate of Valley of the Gods, indulge in Russo-phobic whack-a-mole in Call of Duty: Modern Warfare and ponder space, loss and buttons in Still There. Campo Santo’s Valley of the Gods is now officially on hold as its creators move onto other projects at [...]

Dec 06, 20191 hr 18 min

Episode 304: Zero Dark Flirty

Alex, Chris and Marsh take on the Pied Poper in A Plague Tale: Innocence, pootle across the Sea of Thieves, burp their way through Sigma Theory: Global Cold War and leave a faint but distinctly colonic whiff of Dota in their wake. BUY BUY BUY And people did – specifically they went and bought all [...]

Nov 30, 20192 hr 54 min

Episode 303: The Liquid Beard Conundrum

Tom, Chris, Alex and Marsh rejoice in the return of Half-Life, coo at the UI of Unity of Command II, marvel at the muddle of Death Stranding and spark up our Good Hot Swords in Star Wars Jedi: Fallen Order. This episode is brought to you in association with The People’s Lidl Rum David Bowie [...]

Nov 22, 20193 hr 44 min

Episode 302: Steve Algorithm Does It Again

Alex, Chris and Marsh provide only the most deletable content as they marvel at the obscene indulgence of Death Stranding, tumble through infinity in Manifold Garden and test the limits of dark ecstasy in Lust From Beyond: Prologue. Don’t open with the genital shoggoth. Brian David Gilbert has made a Hideo Kojima name generator. That’s [...]

Nov 15, 20192 hr 55 min

Episode 301: Good Talkie Bad Walkie

Marsh is joined by artist John Roberts to sleuth through Jenny LeClue: Detectivu, unpick the mysteries of Tangle Tower and expose deceptions in Telling Lies. Also: class war and Photoshop brushes. Fallout 1st is undergoing a proletariat revolution. EA’s stuff is back on Steam now. Cool? The Steam Library has been revamped. Hm. Detectiving and [...]

Nov 01, 20191 hr 20 min

Episode 300: Frightened Of The Ur-Teen

Marsh, Alex, Chris, both Toms and (occasionally Pip) assemble for the dawn of the podcast’s third century. Featuring Outer Worlds, more Disco Elysium, Radio Commander, Teamfight Tactics and more. Plus: the rise of Norman Buffus, British Public Transport Elysium, an extremely long conversation about pants, books, the cursed Beeb, and some vital Tom Francis news. [...]

Oct 25, 20193 hr 28 min

Episode 299: Sid Meier’s Colonial Supermarket Sweep

Chris and Marsh get the comms horn for Fortnite’s spectacular server shutdown, eat the wave of FOMO in Destiny 2 and unleash their inner twat upon Disco Elysium. Also: house rules for goblins. Fortnite Chapter 2 is a marketing coup and some sort of game, too, I guess. A good thread on the aforementioned. Chris [...]

Oct 18, 20192 hr 16 min

Episode 298: Metabrain Says Calm The Hell Up

Toms Francis and Senior join Marsh to discuss dismissive dad death in Indivisible and lobby for gun-lobbing in both Borderlands 3 and John Wick Hex. Also: why PCs are awful and no one should build them. Please, don’t say “fampany”. Blizzard’s incredible, punitive reaction to a pro-player speaking out about Hong Kong. UsTwo Games got [...]

Oct 11, 20192 hr 44 min

Episode 297: Buried in My Own Plastic Blood

Tom F, Alex and Marsh discuss the voxely promise of Teardown and existential terror of Microsoft Flight Simulator, return to Destiny redux, play some holes in What the Golf? and get nailed by every pixel in Noita. Put that in your leviathan and smoke it. Admire the restrained scope and exquisite smashiness of Teardown by [...]

Oct 04, 20192 hr 50 min

Episode 296: It’s Like There’s A Whole Other Goose In My Car

Tom F and Chris break into the pod chamber to discuss the latest wave of gaming subscription programmes, the pipe edge situations of Overland, and some game about a goose you probably haven’t heard of. You’ve always got some redundant beans. The subs models in question are Apple Arcade, Xbox Game Pass, Humble Monthly and [...]

Sep 28, 20192 hr 3 min