The Chrissy Swan Show.
You know sometimes you know x oh, No, you've never had an ex partner, have you. I have had exits and you know, and I've had nearly nearly beans and all of that. And some of question that people that want to be in your life often ask you is what are you thinking of? Like they might catch you, like, you know, at the kitchen table or sitting in the passenger seat of their car just looking outside, and they'll go,
penny for your thoughts. And I've never known how to answer that, because my brain is an unusualsque it's an unusual thing.
It could have been quite scary for some people if you started to run through and list what you're thinking.
I agree, but it's only because it's the only you know, geography. I know I'm very safe in there. But for most people it would be like, you know, walking through Gotham City at midnight with a bat on the loose.
Yeah.
And what I thought I would do is sometimes I go I can hear in my mind. There was an old song from the sixties called Windmills of my Mind. And I don't know why I know it because I wasn't even around in the sixties. But I think it's such an iconic song that it goes l like a circle in a spiral, like a.
Wheel within a wheel.
And I remember even knowing it, like five years old, hearing that song like my dad playing with something on vinyl, going that's my brain.
You relate to that like a.
Spiral and a spiral like a wheel within a wheel, and then the word the words go never ending up beginning legs on danging wheel. I'm like, yes, that's me, that's how my brain works. And so I thought I would give you an insight because you know me pretty well. But you have never been inside my head. No, I haven't, and I have, I guess sort of created the machinery, the technology for you to come inside my head. Wow, understand what it's like to spend a minute in there.
Would you like to come into this?
I'm scared, I'm reluctant, but let's.
Enter the windmills of my mind.
In the winds of.
My computer.
Keyboard feels too small, Wabe, my hands are too big.
He's Japanese washy tape.
The same stickiness as masking tape. Linel Richie stares at his reflection in the mirror and says.
I'm linel Richie.
Before he goes on stage. That's true, direct evits hate them. Two eyesight goes downhill quickly. The Irish name Sirsha is spelt s Ao ri s e s must be pronounced. That's another Irish name. Duel chair de leche is structure, a teller technically a cheese or.
Is it part of the cream family?
Those towels I love from Adairs might actually be on sale? Now?
Where can I watch Borat for free?
Wow?
In Windows of your Mind?
Do you think you know me a little better?
I think you have probably lost your mind. I think us collectively today have lost both of our minds.
Anybody think like that? Does any does that relate? Do you relate to that at all? Is your brain like that?
I want to say yes to make you feel better, but.
No, I won't know if anyone else is the Crissy Swan show. I have patented equipment for you to get inside my.
Head pray for us all. Are you going to be paying for psycho bills?
Oh?
No, no no. When you hear this segment win Mills of my mind, do you hear it and go That's not familiar to me? My brain doesn't sound like that. Like, what is your feedback? And then I'll tell you what the general consensus from hundreds of thousands of people have made.
Hundreds of thousands of your reckon. That's how many dms you're going through?
Seven million?
Wow for a busy lady. I can't believe you find the time everyone. I have thoughts. Obviously, we all have thoughts, but yours are just a lot quicker, like there's a lot more going around that when mill where's mine? So if I take my thoughts for a walk, I think.
Yeah, no, I don't have time. I have no time to take anything for a walk, because all of a sudden there is another unrelated, illogical thought that pops up. Anyway, I give to you the second recording from inside my brain and keep listening because there is a special guest in this one.
Like a circle and a spi, like a wheel within a wheel never ending again. I'm never smelling wee.
That's a dusty springfield. By the way, I'm miss Raspberry Melbourgh's in shoe pastry from Patterson's Bakery.
I wonder why they went under.
That song Don't call Me Up by Mabel Banger. She's Nina Cherry's daughter, or I had some green paint left over, and actually some of.
That funny baby pool yellow stuff too.
Hm hmmm.
When did Gwyneth Paltrow's dad pass away?
Because I'm pretty sure Chris Martin must have written fixed you for her.
Try fix.
Plants near the garage are dying. Bob Geldof's kids have the greatest names. I wonder what Bob Geldof is doing right now?
Hi, Chris, I'm right here, Bob Geldoff.
Yes, it's me.
I'm inside your hand woomier.
Than I imagined.
Oh, I thank you? I think what are you doing here.
During Australia next year? So I don't pop in through your rear role into this vast empty space and say hello hello?
Yeah? No that thank you for entering my whole.
I feel strangely compelled to say that.
If you want to enjoy an evening with Bob Geldof, go to takedaity dot com.
Good girl.
Now, how do I get out of here?
I wish I knew Bob.
I wish I knew. I've been stuck in here myself for fifty one years. I didn't even feel him to come inside.
Why we should have.
There.
Oh well, oh my god, went from my Lord.
Toward last this year the Christy Swan Show, the Chrissy Swan Show. But have you ever wondered what it sounds like inside my mind? I have you ever looked at me, met me on the street and said, hey, penny for your thoughts? Well you're about to get it. It's not gonna cost you a penny. You're gonna want your penny back because I'm inviting you into my brain. My brain is a very strange, weird and wonderful place, and I've managed to record the types of thoughts that run through it minute by minute.
Let's get into that brain. Swanee like a circle and.
A splui never ending again, I'm a nervous spelly wee.
His baby must be almost six months now. Oh my god, Honey is a really cute name.
I loved that belt buckle I had in nineteen eighty nine that looked like the ones that Bross had. Who was the one that wasn't a twin Craig Logan, wrongnut tingerbread, upside down cake.
His office works open.
An electric or even like a cordless mower would surely do the trick. The cordless mowers exist. That brass mixer tap I got off. The hard Rubbish Collection is still in its box and it has its instructions.
What are the odds?
Magic?
Magic is my favorite? Olivia Newton, John Song.
Cool, Christie wiel Brown, Hi.
How do you sell a car.
That's factual? I'm tired of listening to it.
I know it's factual because I reckon. You've texted me three times this week if I know anyone that sells car.
I asked you once. I asked you once, and I said, can I pay? This? Chrissy Swan Show is a Nova podcast. For more great comedy shows like this, head to Nova podcast dot com.
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