This is the Chrissy Swan Show, and I'm a little bit rattled today.
You are now.
I just want to start off by saying we have spoken a little a bit about this off air. I did bad news laugh when you started telling me, and I don't mean it in a nasty way if I do it, no.
And I understand that because I coined the phrase bad you did the bad news laugh. In case you're wondering what we're talking about. I thought it was unique to me, but it's not. But it is very popular and not many people react this way. You know, when someone tells you some really bad news and you realize that you're going to laugh. And what I do is, instead of just laughing in the face of their tragedy, I call it something I say, oh my god, Oh I'm so sorry. I've done a bad news laugh.
I think it's one of the greatest things you've taught me, though, because it immediately eliminates any malice when someone's telling you something sad.
It's true you need to acknowledge it. But do you imagine if you didn't imagine if what had happened just now And I came into work and I said Jack I'm really sad about Chicago.
Now.
For those that don't know who Chicago is, it is Christy Swan and her daughter Pegs beloved rabbit.
So I thought it would be a great idea for the kids on Christmas Day to get two beautiful mini lock bunnies. And I didn't care too much about them. They're cute whatever. I have fallen deeply in love with these rabbits. They are magical with their floppy ears and their little fat heads. And I take photos of Gingy. There's two sisters, Chicago and Gingy. I take photos of Gingy's feet and bottom every day.
Creepy Jack.
It's the cutest thing ever. Anyway, there's a disaster this morning because we have you know where they sleep in the protective hutch, and then we have what we call the.
Dayspa bougie rabbits we haven't.
We call the day spar, which is just like a black iron pin. And then we put you know, fresh fruit and veg in there in a little running tunnel and out on the grass it's wild.
Whilst you guys are at work in school, they're not like caged up. They're running through the day spar and they're running.
Through the day spa, but only when the weather's good. We wouldn't put them out there in them in the sleet. Oh my god. Anyway, Peg before school puts Chicago, the cutest little black rabbit with like a mink scarf.
On, with a beautiful name too.
She puts Chicago to her rabbit, puts Chicago in the day spar comes back, has a chat to me. We gas bag whatever, shoot the rubbish, and then she's like, I get I've got to put Ginger in there. She gets Gingy from the hutch. She's carrying Gingy towards the day spa and she can't see. We call her Caggie. She can't see Chicago. She like, where's Caggy.
Caggie's dead.
No, she's not dead, Jagged.
Sorry, PEG's stealing the class run.
She might not be, you know, it's just our luck.
You've got tears in your eyes. Sorry. Okay, So Chicago's missing.
Anyway, she hadn't she she had latched it closed after she'd put Chicago in there, but it didn't lash. Yeah, she didn't just walk away. She did it and it didn't work.
So she's going to live with guilt for the rest of her life that she has killed her rabbit.
No, she hasn't.
Sorry, sorry, sorry, now she hasn't because we could still find Chicago.
Nobody, no crime as my savior. And Queen says, all right, So where I have been. I had to keep it upbeat because it was right before school drop off, and she's like, what where is she? She's only little, she's never been out, and I said, no, it's fine, bunnies do that. She's probably hiding. She's playing with you inside. I am tearing my heart out. Anyway, get her off to school. I get home. He am in the I'm in a proper outfit. I wore something nice for you.
I know now you look like you've been on Burke's backyard.
I have been on berks back gap. I got Gingy out of the hutch and put her in the pen as a lure to try and get Chicago to come out. I poked every inch. It was like playing KerPlunk, you know. I poked every inch of the garden. At the end of a rake. Nothing And I want to know thirteen twenty four to ten, these are our first rabbits. We love them, so do they hide? Where did you find your rabbit? What is she doing? Is she watching me
now Chrissy Swan Show? And that's what I said when I realized Chicago the rabbit had escaped.
Oh oh oh, she's in hiding maybe like Beyonce as well. I'm so worried, I.
Know, because it's going to be I mean, there's obviously the sad part about potentially losing a rabbit. But I appreciate for you as a mother you're doing. You're going to be dealing with a very traumatized child. He's probably going to need a lot of therapy over the coming years, given that she didn't latch it properly.
And I know that you're trying to be a real smart ass, but you are spot on. And because Peg and I are so like cosmically connected, Ah, her mood is my mood. And frankly, I'm scared of her. I'm scared of her today. I'm scared of her. I want to go into witness protection never see her again, because when she's sad, it makes me so sad. It hurts me on the inside.
Like a voodoo doll.
I want to talk to a kick. By the way, thirteen twenty four ten, where is Chicago? Please tell me where this bunny has gone to?
If you are a legit psychic, call through. But first we're asking on thirteen twenty four ten, where did you find your rabbit?
Where should Chrissy be looking?
Yeah, because I'm a new I'm a new rabbit mom, rabbit mom. Hi, Sarah, Hello, how about you? You've got a bunny?
I have?
I had two bunnies actually, but both of them end up running away and up catching them again.
Okay, well that's not a great outcome. Well were they Are they like normal bunnies or are they bougie bunnies like the ones I've got? That was it? Like a friends? Why not?
Like they're not bougie, But they aren't being like Pavot either, you know.
Like I've had a Pavo. I've had a Pavo bunny. My god, he grew to be the size of a greyhound with the attitude of a talkback radio host.
Really, they are rough. Priceline pharmacy voucher for you, Sarah. Also, Sarah's just reminded me of something she said, Her bunnies ran away. You've had a cat run away. So maybe Chicago wasn't loving the living conditions and ran.
Oh no, she's so beloved.
All right, let's go to Teresa Swani.
I buy corn for human consumption to give to Chicago because it's her favorite. In fact, that's where I was before this show started.
What buying corn?
Buying corn and putting it out on the yard chicken. Look, I confessed, do you know what I did? This is what I did. I'm going to say it. I got the corn. Yeah, and I ran it along the side of the shrubs.
Oh, I wish we had CCTV.
If you looking that on jumped in case she's looking, and she went, ah, yes, Teresa, where is this bunny? Where was yours?
Okay, we found our rabbit, found the only patch of bird in our entire yard and dug herself between the two coloured ond sensors. And because the little thing was little and she's got a big booty, as you know with rabbits do, she got herself in, but she couldn't get herself out. So when my husband comes to tell me that he's found the rabbit with this look on his face, if at oh, he's found a dead rabbit somewhere,
And no, he found her alive. In the meantime, my daughter I do apologize to tell you this was so traumatized by the loss of the rabbit that I had bought a new rabbit in the twenty four hours the rabbit had gone.
Nothing Teresa to try yet, I said, I want to get I've already been in touch with the breeder. And I didn't want to say I need a new rabbit. Have you got one that's about a year old and black that I could lie to my daughter about But it's too soon.
No, no, well mine was. I was all honesty. I want to tell her. I let her out to have her freedom, because we can't keep her caught up in the pen. And I was so felt, so guilty that I let this rabbit out, you know, to give it a good life and let it have a run around the yard. And she said, no, we are not leaving the shops. Let's took us to the shop. Let her buy any toy she wanted. And I thought, now is the time to tell us. I'll tell her, and I told her, and she refused to leave the shops until
we found a new rabbit. So at we had got a new rabbit. And I'm telling it's twenty four hours to turnover.
That is a quick turnover.
That is really quick.
No psychics have called through, so I think it's probably because they don't want to tell you the truth. Because mister Jack thinks the rabbit has gone. No, no, no, you don't you know we'll be back after this.
No, the Creasy Swan shows, The Creasy Swan Show. It's time. Yesterday I was very emotional because I was talking about Chicago, my daughter's bunny, who I have fallen in love with. I love that bunny.
Yeah, it's weird, man, She's magical.
What happened. I'll give you a quick update in case you missed completely yesterday. My daughter moves. Peg moves her bunny Chicago from where she sleeps into what we call the day spar, which is like an enclosed pen so she can have a stretch of her legs during the day. Yes, she does that every morning before school.
A bougie bunny. I'm no animal guy, but it's a gorgeous bunny. You've showed me several photos.
Not only is she pretty, she is charismatic. We are mad at chicagoz if you will, she's got Riz mad Riz. Anyway, Peg did that, as she always does, went back to get Chicago's sister, Gingy returned to the day spa and she was like, where's Chicago. There was a fault with the latch and she had latched it, but it hadn't latched. Chicago escaped and it's the first time that we have not been able to just get our eyes on this bunny. Peg had to go to school, and I mean, all
hell broke loose. I was trying to be positive, but I was really worried because I thought, this bunny's gone. We're never going to see her again. And I have to, you know, mother up and talk about grief and loss and all of that stuff with my daughter. And I just never wanted to go home. I wanted to join the witness protection program.
You did stay here quite late last night. I think I was home for like fifteen minutes and you were still here.
Oh yeah, I was here till like I stayed for an hour and a half after the show. I wanted to avoid it anyway. After Pegg had gone to school, I searched for two hours, every inch, every nook and cranny of the garden. Couldn't find the bunny. Had to come into work. I texted Charlotte, our next door neighbor, and she got back to me later on in the afternoon to tell me, Oh god, now I can't wait to tell me that she'd looked for the bunny and
couldn't find her. The guy that mos my lawns popped in and I said to him, please keep your eye out for this bunny. And I said, in a photo of Chicago.
Imagine if you just started cutting the grass and feathers were just flying everywhere.
That would be odd because rabbits don't have feathers. Yeah, they got for beautiful soft fur. Anyway, he texted me back, no, sorry, no bunny. And then the heartbreaking texts from my daughter while I was still on air and she had finished school, and she's like, update, question Mark, do you think she'll eventually show up? Mum? I'm so scared tonight. Can we both go through the front yard in the backyard she could be anywhere? Mum? What if we don't find her? Mum?
What if I never see her again? Mum. So I'm just like, oh my god, how do I answer this poor girl? Because the chances are yes, the bunny has.
Gone you and danger girl, you danger girl.
Anyway, As I said, I wanting to join the Witness Protection program, and I didn't want to go home and mother up. Eventually, I was getting my stuff together and my phone went off two texts at the same time, one from my son Kit and one from my daughter. Kits said, OMG, and Peg said, we found her.
What.
Yes, she was up in my podcast.
How did she get up there?
She's aspirational, she's aspirational, we screamed. My daughter was crying. By the time I got home, I was dancing around the backyard holding that bunny, enjoying this song and singing it by Chicago and if you leave me now, you'll tally the big I was singing into that bunny's little face. Anyway, I put a padlock on the hutch.
Now I'm surprised the bunny didn't die from how hard you're all squeezing and hugging it. She loves us to the photos are were receiving last night. That bunny is gonna wish it had stayed away.
Listen, I should post the photograph of what my kids saw. So they were in the backyard. My podcast studio is up on a second level above the garage. There's this little silhouette of a little black bunny behind the curtain full view. She was just watching us from above, going.
Enjoy your day of hell.
Yes, exactly, the Chrissy Swan Show. I think I need to talk about these bunnies, Chicago and Ginger, Jago and Gingy. Gingy did start off with a different name, and it's been so long now I can't remember what it was. Oh, Kara something anyway, Kara, Kara milk or Kara Karamello.
That feels a bit stupid.
No, it was cinnabun.
Oh, cineabun. No, that also feels a bit stupid. You guys picked great names because Chicago and Ginger are great names.
Well I did. Yeah, kid agrees with you, and Sinnebun was his rabbit and he said, I can't even say.
The word I'm with your kids. I'm not calling her that nonsense.
So she became Gingy. She's massive, by the way.
Oh she's a big girl.
Oh my god, she's a big girl. She's sturdy, very sturdy.
What about Kaggi, she's little. Yeah, so it's a.
Kardashian true to her form.
I got these bunnies for the kids, and I did not expect to fall in love with them.
Yeah, you've lost your mind. You've given them a day spar you think they're humans.
My camera role is full of photographs of them and videos of them doing stuff like cleaning their little faces with their paws, like who am I? Who am I recording that for?
It's also so not you. That's so off brand for us, And this is what I mean.
It's really taken me by surprise.
So when you lost Chicago last week, it makes sense and tracks that you were properly beside your eye.
I was properly upset that I may never see that magnificent little bunny again. I am obsessed with their bottoms and their tails.
Okay, that's weird.
Just this morning I pulled up a chair to where they live and talk. They're the first people I see every morning I go downstairs. I talk to them. I've organized to have scraps delivered to me because I'm very time poor. I buy them corn on the cop with real money because I know they love it.
That you haven't told me about. Are you still at the compounder? Have you checked in somewhere because it feels like a program that they would potentially put on for people that are you know, getting some help it's.
Very it's very unusual. Yeah, I know, they're like, you know, what do they call it?
Emotional support?
It gets worse because Peg, my daughter is all so obsessed. Every day we check in to each other, check in with each other to see what sort of day we're having, and we we we asked the question, I can't believe I'm obidding this. Who are you today? Your Chicago or you Gingy. They've got very different personalities.
Is Chicago a vibe and Ginger's a bit more sad?
Gingy's cranky but also delicious.
Chicago is so like you on a salty day. Yeah, still delicious.
But if you're cheeky, or if you're having a bit of fun, you're Chicago. And some and even now Peg blames things on Chicago, Like if she does something that annoys me, I go, Peg, She'll go, it wasn't me, it was Chicago. Oh wow, alter Ego.
She's also going to need some therapy if this continues into her teen years.
Well, I'm glad that I've got my obsession off my chest. But the latest thing is this. They are outdoor bunnies. I mean bunnies are bunnies, right, Chicago is spending a lot of time in PEG's.
Room, and it's very trailer, trash of you.
And I'm all for it. This is I know, they're very clean and they're a litter trained. How do they do that? She hops over to her it. Anyway, the other day I heard Peg talking to someone in her room and I thought, oh, she's not a WhatsApp group or whatever. You know, that's all good. That's all girls do is that they talk all through school and then they come home and they keep talking.
Just voice note each other NonStop.
Yeah. Anyway, I put my ear up. No, she's talking to Chicago. Her brother's in there too. Her brother's in her room. They've got Chicago on the bed and I looked through the door. This is what this is what it's come to. She's got as Sydney Swan's AFL flag on the bed. She's got a Richmond Tiger's AFL flag on the bed, and there's a little bunch of rocket on each of the flags.
Wow.
And she's gently saying to Chicago, I just want to find out which team you go to go for. So this is the situation.
I reckon in about a week, you're going to come in and we're going to be talking about the fact that pegs are furry now and has turned into a rabbit.
Oh my god, I did search how to buy a rabbit's tail.
Because that's the thing. No, don't encourage it.
The Chrissy Swan Show is a Nova podcast. For more great comedy shows like this, head to novapodcast dot com. Do you