Episode 94. Ignacio joins Kyle and Melissa this week for a discussion on ranking zoo animals, mom theme songs, and what might be the first movie to debut in theaters again later this year. We name the movies we've watched the most times as adults and describe the worst movie that we have ever seen, for varying values of "worst." Ignacio also talks how he picked electric engineering for his career path and the video game props he's tried to recreate in real life! Click here to watch a video of th...
May 04, 2020•1 hr 32 min•Season 3Ep. 94
Episode 93. After some discussion on expensive furniture and questionable Zoom backgrounds, we remember the sober fun of our youth. Kyle danced until 5 AM, almost got kicked out of the Philadelphia Art Museum, and did get kicked out of a Target. Melissa participated in elaborate scavenger hunts and reads off the list items, telling tales of suburban mischief like trading clothes in public and throwing waffles at an Arby's. We also solve some simple, uneventful mysteries. Click here to watch a vi...
Apr 27, 2020•1 hr 28 min•Season 3Ep. 93
Episode 92. You're heard her name mentioned every episode as a Patron supporter, now Sam joins us for the podcast this week! She and Melissa tell the convoluted backstory of their friendship and bombard Kyle with St. Louis minutiae, including fake twitter accounts for local businesses. Kyle wonders exactly how "contactless" his pizza delivery really is and talks about a time he misspelled his own name. We also discuss obscure computer games we played as kids, video game streaming, and mall memor...
Apr 20, 2020•1 hr 32 min•Season 3Ep. 92
Episode 91. The big topic this week is what our dream houses would look like! We discuss conversation pits, indoor/outdoor pools, and what we would do with two TVs right next to each other. Kyle recounts some farmboy antics. Melissa has too many feelings about the movie Flubber. We also talk about movies we've seen that have had major impacts on other movies we've seen and what cultural inspirations we can trace back. Click here to watch a video of this episode. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon...
Apr 13, 2020•1 hr 26 min•Season 3Ep. 91
Episode 90. We have news on the topic you're most worried about: the Artemis Fowl movie. We also discuss the changes to the Marvel movie lineup for the next couple years, and wonder what theaters will do if they're able to open again before big movies are ready to launch. Melissa revisits a core text of her young adulthood, the weird fairy tale TV miniseries The 10th Kingdom, and Kyle of course draws comparisons to Kingdom Hearts. We talk about our evolving podcast habits and pitch some movies s...
Apr 06, 2020•1 hr 9 min•Season 3Ep. 90
Episode 89. We discuss the narrative important of milk in the movie 1917 and Monster Energy drinks in Death Stranding. What flavor is the original Red Bull? What fruit is that?? We also recount cheesy home movies we made as kids, and spend a lot of time talking about music! Kyle and Melissa both try to describe what genres they like, favorite artists, important albums, and their custom Spotify playlists. Click here to watch a video of this episode. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★...
Mar 30, 2020•1 hr 25 min•Season 3Ep. 89
Episode 88. Kyle and Melissa report on their first weeks working solely from home, what media they've been occupying themselves with, and what media they've kept coming back to throughout their lives. Kyle talks about Assassin's Creed: Odyssey and his love for space opera anime featuring Victorian military garb. Melissa has finally finished The Venture Bros and tries to explain the obscure fantasy book series Nightrunner. If you're playing the Whatnauts drinking game, we both talk about how much...
Mar 24, 2020•1 hr 16 min•Season 3Ep. 88
Episode 87. There's one institution that won't be affected by massive coronavirus closures, and that's podcasts recorded over Skype. Melissa and Kyle are here to discuss the delayed movies, cancelled sports, banned orgies, and other changes to everyday life worldwide in this strange scary time. We also talk about pies both hot and cold, what type of cartoon characters we think we could play, and the awesome Avengers Campus coming to Disney's California Adventure, eventually, whenever the parks a...
Mar 16, 2020•1 hr 23 min•Season 3Ep. 87
Episode 86. Kyle tells a DMV horror story and Melissa remembers being 10 years old and accidentally buying a movie with boobs in it at a Sam Goody. No Time To Die has been pushed back to November for concerns of coronavirus spreading in crowded theaters worldwide. Thank goodness the Artemis Fowl movie hasn't been delayed again! A new trailer is out and we finally get a good look at the updated storyline and aesthetics of the movie compared to the book. Click here to watch a video of this episode...
Mar 09, 2020•1 hr 24 min•Season 3Ep. 86
Episode 85. Did your family ever meet with a traveling meat salesman? Kyle has been investigating a Squarespace mystery and a MeUndies shortage. We discuss what it would be like to be the heir to the fortune of a weirdly specific family business and how the future of Disney may be affected by the recent CEO change from Bob Iger to Bob Chapek, especially how the parks may develop! Click here to watch a video of this episode. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★...
Mar 02, 2020•1 hr 15 min•Season 3Ep. 85
Episode 84. We discuss art shows, excessively-themed stores, and weird giant sculptures and animatronics. We each try to name our personal seven modern wonders of the world! How can we reinvent the distinctive physical experience of going to a Blockbuster? Is Moviefone still a thing? Click here to watch a video of this episode. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★...
Feb 25, 2020•1 hr 31 min•Season 3Ep. 84
Episode 83. Melissa takes advantage of her pizza lineage and Kyle tells us how to hack a scantron test. We discuss Billie Eilish's theme to No Time to Die and Batman's new outfit, and Kyle tries to start a bold trend in awards show fashion. We also list the worst dates we've ever been on, and the worst date that Melissa has heard of. Click here to watch a video of this episode. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★...
Feb 17, 2020•1 hr 21 min•Season 3Ep. 83
Episode 82. We're starting a new tradition on the Captain's Log! We looked at 22 major movies coming out this year, from Sonic the Hedgehog to The Eternals, and guessed the Rotten Tomatoes score. At the end of the year, we'll see whose scores were the closest, and we also made non-score predictions to throw into the game. Will the villain of the new James Bond movie turn out to be a revamped Dr. No? Is Natasha telling us the story of Black Widow from inside the realm of the soul stone? Which one...
Feb 11, 2020•1 hr 45 min•Season 3Ep. 82
Episode 81. Much like Han, Pizza Lord is back in business. Justice for Pizza Lord! We try to understand the Fast & Furious 9 trailer and spend a lot of time guessing who Owen Wilson is going to play in the Loki series. Baldur the Brave? Adam Warlock? The voice of Loki's conscience? Himself?? We also brainstorm fun bonus episodes for reaching our Patreon goals, and figure out our new tradition of a box office movie draft for the year. Click here to watch a video of this episode. ★ Support thi...
Feb 03, 2020•1 hr 28 min•Season 3Ep. 81
Episode 80. Melissa tries a new beauty gadget and explains the plot of Dolittle. Kyle has a pizza trust fund he can't spend, and he can't buy any carrots either, but at least he's legally free to dance. We discuss both Pokemon and Fast & The Furious somehow. Why did Mr. Peanut have to die? Click here to watch a video of this episode. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★...
Jan 27, 2020•1 hr 20 min•Season 3Ep. 80
Episode 79. Melissa recaps the Jeopardy championships and has become fascinated by the sure-to-flop movie Dolittle. Kyle read his shopping list, pitches an episode of Black Mirror, and updates us on his struggles as Pizza Lord. We discuss the trailer for Morbius and dream of a unified Spider-Man continuity! Click here to watch a video of this episode. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★...
Jan 20, 2020•1 hr 32 min•Season 3Ep. 79
Episode 78. It's the first Captain's Log of 2020 and Kyle has ascended this plane of existence and has become Pizza Lord. Meanwhile Melissa is intrigued by the "Toss a Coin To Your Witcher" song. And Jupiter is being mean to us Earthlings. Click here to watch a video of this episode. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★
Jan 13, 2020•1 hr 26 min•Season 3Ep. 78
It's our 4th birthday! Wow. It feels like it's been forever. Whether you have stuck around with us since the beginning, or are a new listener, thank you so much. We could not do any of this without you. Melissa and Kyle have been chugging along, Mick and Ignacio have joined the crew, and we even started a new show, Crossplay. Here's to four more years! Click here to watch a video of this episode. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★...
Jan 10, 2020•3 hr 45 min
Episode 77. It's the final episode of 2019! We discuss the upcoming Star Wars film, as well as the trailers for Ghostbusters and Wonder Woman. Also, there was some weird headlines in the news this week. The Mafia is gay now, and thousands of penis fish washed up on shore in California. We live in a wild world. Click here to watch a video of this episode. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★...
Dec 17, 2019•1 hr 36 min•Season 2Ep. 77
Episode 76. It's been two weeks since our last episode due to some technical difficulties and illness, but we are finally back! Kyle tells a story of him getting high for the first time, Melissa discusses the James Bond trailer, and more! It feels great to be back. Click here to watch a video of this episode. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★...
Dec 09, 2019•1 hr 1 min•Season 2Ep. 76
Episode 75. Who would have thunk that Sonic would be cute again? A new trailer for the Sonic movie came out and we wrestle with whether or not we want to support it. Disney+ has been pretty awesome so far despite a few missing features. And Melissa took another road trip this week. Click here to watch a video of this episode. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★...
Nov 19, 2019•1 hr 22 min•Season 2Ep. 75
Episode 74. We never expected it, but Kyle's parents met Kanye West and somehow neglected to tell him for two days. Melissa is overwhelmed by the price of Marvel's Infinity Saga Box Set, but has an idea never before seen in podcasting! Click here to watch a video of this episode. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★
Nov 12, 2019•1 hr 28 min•Season 2Ep. 74
Episode 73. Kyle tells the story of his motivational muscle car. HBO Max announced a bunch of things coming to their streaming service and it's actually pretty impressive. Melissa and her department at work lose the costume contest. Click here to watch a video of this episode. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★
Nov 05, 2019•1 hr 29 min•Season 2Ep. 73
Episode 72. It is almost Halloween and so we decided to make a new tradition of turning our old episodes of The Captain's Log into horror stories. Plus, Kyle's terrible luck continues. We also talk about the new trailers for Bloodshot and Star Wars Rise of Skywalker. Click here to watch a video of this episode. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★...
Oct 28, 2019•1 hr 39 min•Season 2Ep. 72
Episode 71. We are keeping it short this week, but diving into the extensive list of movies and shows Disney+ recently announced on their twitter. We also talk about Kevin Feige being promoted to Chief Creative Office of Marvel and HBO getting the streaming rights to the Studio Ghibli films. Click here to watch a video of this episode. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★...
Oct 21, 2019•59 min•Season 2Ep. 71
Episode 70. The results of our poll on whether Star Wars or Star Trek is sexier are in and Kyle must admit defeat. Melissa's birthday is coming up and she is stealing all the luck. She also found her first gray hair unfortunately. Plus, how is it that Apple can do something so poorly and something else so incredibly? Click here to watch a video of this episode. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★...
Oct 14, 2019•1 hr 20 min•Season 2Ep. 70
Episode 69. This week on The Captain's Log, Melissa wanted to debate the sexiness of Star Wars and Star Trek. So let us know which one you think is the sexiest of the two. Also, Kyle is worried that he bought a jacket for his Halloween costume that is way too small. And we take a look at some out of context photos from Nintendo games that you should absolutely send to your crush. Click here to watch a video of this episode. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★...
Oct 07, 2019•1 hr 27 min•Season 2Ep. 69
Episode 68. Happy birthday Google! Now you can legally drink here in the US. If Google was an alcoholic drink, what would it be? Spider-Man is back in the MCU, but who would Macaulay Culkin play? And we discuss the crazy pets that the Presidents have had. This one is a wild ride folks. Click here to watch a video of this episode. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★...
Sep 30, 2019•1 hr 31 min•Season 2Ep. 68
Episode 67. We took a week off last week while most of us were off adventuring or getting sick. This week, we are back in the saddle and discussing a few things we missed like Friday the 13th, the full moon, and Scooby-Doo's 50th Anniversary. Plus, Melissa demands some facts about Virginia. Did you know Virginia is the "Internet capital of the world"? Click here to watch a video of this episode. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★...
Sep 23, 2019•1 hr 30 min•Season 2Ep. 67
Episode 66. Melissa makes fun of Kyle's tiny Mountain Dew Can. Kyle played and beat Control, and he also cannot seem to escape the song Tubthumping by Chumbawumba. Netflix ships its 5 billionth DVD. And we want to know… is shipping & handling a scam? Click here to watch a video of this episode. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★
Sep 09, 2019•1 hr 27 min•Season 2Ep. 66
