In this highlight from the show, Dr. Cloud talks about how and why we procrastinate and gives us some deceptively simple ways to address it. It starts with shrinking the task. Because the things we are putting off doing are always overwhelming in some way, the key is in breaking it down to one simple thing you can do. It’s not that you lack the ability to do the thing you’re avoiding, it’s just that you aren’t moving. Your emergency brake is engaged. Get that parking brake off, pop that tiny hol...
Sep 28, 2022•12 min•Season 1Ep. 368
Starting on a successful path of growth requires having a good accountability partner. So what makes for a good accountability partner? Dr. Cloud goes through a short checklist of what to seek out and what to avoid in our candidates. Dr. Cloud's next workshop is on Healing Parental Wounds . In this 2-hour live streaming webinar Dr. Cloud will help you identify your parental relationship injuries, understand how to face them, and give you the practical tools and advice you need to grow past your ...
Sep 21, 2022•10 min•Season 1Ep. 367
Dr. Cloud's next workshop is on Healing Parental Wounds . In this 2-hour live streaming webinar Dr. Cloud will help you identify your parental relationship injuries, understand how to face them, and give you the practical tools and advice you need to grow past your suffering. If you can't attend live, don't worry, you can stream the recording as much as you like. To find out more about it go to https://Boundaries.me/ parental Get one week of free coaching videos from Dr. Cloud and boundaries.me!...
Sep 14, 2022•19 min•Season 1Ep. 366
We all want to be self confident but it’s often elusive. Dr. Cloud takes us through an introduction on how we acquire self confidence. Self confidence comes from trusting yourself and your actions. That’s hard to do when we doubt ourselves. Dr. Cloud brings it back to original sin, and the idea that we are able to judge like God does. When we commit to these types of self judgments we are no longer simply doing the thing in front of us, but also criticizing it in ways that cause anxiety, fear of...
Aug 26, 2022•20 min•Season 1Ep. 365
In this highlight from The Dr. Cloud Show: When we’re trying to get from point A to B in a relationship or with a goal, a critical factor is our time. Literally anything we want to improve on–an addiction, finances, raising children, learning a new skill–requires time and prioritization. How we use our time is obviously important, but it’s very easy to miss the reality of what we’re doing with it. That’s where the time audit comes in. When you learn where you’re actually spending your time doing...
Aug 17, 2022•19 min•Season 1Ep. 364
In this highlight from the podcast, Dr. Cloud discusses the old cliche about how your thinking determines your feelings. Does your thinking change your feelings? Do your feelings change your behavior? Does your behavior change your thinking? In short, yes, to all of these depending on what you need to address. It might not be intuitive. You might be feeling anxious, and you know that changing your thinking will change how you’re feeling, but good luck! We often find that with anxiety, we need to...
Aug 13, 2022•12 min•Season 1Ep. 363
Achieving the ideals in life–feeling good, having great relationships, and accomplishing goals–is something that all of us want. It’s funny that so many of us struggle with this right? So often the first crucial step is missing. You have to focus on the inside. Seeking internal growth is required to see the changes we want come into existence. Dr. Cloud asks: What path are you on to work on your internal growth? Dr. Cloud's "Getting Over Trauma" workshop is on August 30th at 5pm Pacific! Get 20%...
Aug 04, 2022•17 min•Season 1Ep. 362
In this highlight from the Dr. Cloud Show, Henry talks about a key mental state for making big changes. 99% of what you’re trying to accomplish in your life has been done, even the really hard stuff. People have lost 100 pounds, they have turned around broken relationships, they’ve gone from bankruptcy to wealth. These things happen and they can happen for you, but it requires doing things differently than you’re doing them. The first step is believing it’s possible. The next step is getting hel...
Jul 25, 2022•15 min•Season 1Ep. 361
In this highlight from the podcast, Dr. Cloud dives into an all-too common problem during confrontations: Hijacking. We’ve probably all had this happen at least once. Someone has done something that needs to be addressed and when we confront them they externalize it: it’s about someone else, or some other thing that happened. The problem is no longer in the room, and as we all know, you can’t fix a problem that’s not in the room. Another thing they might do is turn into the victim and shut down....
Jul 18, 2022•16 min•Season 1Ep. 360
The word “hate” triggers lots of thoughts in most people, but there are good types of hate. It’s good to hate depression, poverty, lies, violence and so on. In fact, what we hate can actually define us in positive ways. At the core of this talk, Dr. Cloud points out that while hating is a very natural human emotion, it needs to be done the right way. We have an upcoming workshop called Getting Over Trauma on August 30th at 5pm Pacific! Dr. Cloud will help you identify your traumatic injuries, an...
Jul 13, 2022•19 min•Season 1Ep. 359
There are two parallel tracks that run through just about everything we do: Love and Truth, or put another way–Love and Structure–or yet another Love and Limits. To get the good out of something we need to apply a structure, a method, a limit, but we need to do it lovingly. This applies broadly in life. Not just in how we treat others, but also in how we talk to ourselves. When you fail at something, do you give yourself feedback with love? Probably not. That’s the big divide. Get Love and Limit...
Jul 09, 2022•22 min•Season 1Ep. 358
What does happiness mean to you? 90% of it comes from things other than circumstances. We don’t have a lot of control over the circumstances in our lives, but we do have control over our practices and routines. No matter what circumstances happen to you, winning the lottery, buying something you’ve always wanted, whatever it is, you’ll come back to your set-point of happiness. Happy people put practices in their lives that lead to their set-point of happiness increasing, and you can too. So what...
Jun 24, 2022•26 min•Season 1Ep. 357
In this highlight from the podcast, Dr. Cloud comes back to a foundational, but oft overlooked aspect of boundaries. The Law of Respect. When we want people to respect our boundaries we in turn have to respect theirs, and it’s not easy. We have to learn to love and respect people’s “no’s.” It’s one of the hardest parts about setting boundaries. We have an upcoming workshop on Narcissism on June 28th at 5pm Pacific! If you can't attend live, don't worry, you can stream the recording as much as yo...
Jun 18, 2022•15 min•Season 1Ep. 356
In this highlight Dr. Cloud talks about the gap between where we are now and where we want to be. It’s often fear that prevents us from getting where we want to be. Each person's fears are different. How are you afraid, and what does your reaction to fear look like? Dr. Cloud talks about how to find what those fears are in the different parts of your life. Got a narcissist in your life? Not sure what to do? Then you're in luck! We have an upcoming workshop on Narcissism on June 28th at 5pm Pacif...
Jun 07, 2022•17 min•Season 1Ep. 355
In this highlight from the show, Dr. Cloud addresses why we worry about people not liking us. It’s fine to be concerned about what people close to you think, but not everyone. If we can’t differentiate between who matters to us and who doesn’t, then anyone can affect us. We’ll start people-pleasing with everybody. The solution is not a solo-event. While there is some work one can do on their own to rewire their thinking, what matters is spending time in healing relationships. That could be a the...
Jun 04, 2022•16 min•Season 1Ep. 354
In this highlight from the podcast, Dr. Cloud answers a frequently asked question about getting a parent to seek therapy. For people of faith, belief in the power of prayer can sometimes prevent them from seeking professional therapy. When someone says it’s all just psycho-babble, the Bible says otherwise. We need help from others, for grieving, for addiction, for depression, and so much more, and the Bible backs that up. Got a narcissist in your life? Not sure what to do? Then you're in luck! W...
Jun 01, 2022•16 min•Season 1Ep. 353
In this highlight from the podcast, Dr. Cloud answers a written question: How do I get started changing emotionally unhealthy patterns? The first step to breaking an unhealthy pattern is recognizing and owning the need to change it. Following that, we need to become comfortable with it taking some time. Unhealthy patterns are not changed overnight. Healing takes time, and growth takes time. Changing a pattern is not the same as fixing a problem. Patterns recur, problems are incidental. Which lea...
May 26, 2022•13 min•Season 1Ep. 352
In this highlight from the podcast Dr. Cloud dispels the myth of “self-help.” All help comes from outside ourselves. We have to get out of our closed circle in order to break through and learn new things. But advice is cheap, and you can get it anywhere. You have to turn to people that have the skills, energy and or intelligence to really help you. Whatever gap you want to close in your life, try doing it on your own, but realize that you may need help. When you learn that you’re not in a closed...
May 25, 2022•13 min•Season 1Ep. 351
In this highlight from the show, Dr. Cloud talks about follow-through. We all commit ourselves to getting things done. Whether that’s helping out a friend, or telling our spouse we’ll do something, whatever it may be. When we fail to get those things done, we might think it’s because we lacked follow-through. But is that it? A lack of follow-through implies that something could have been done but we failed to execute for some reason. In many instances the issue isn’t the follow-through, it’s com...
May 19, 2022•17 min•Season 1Ep. 350
In this highlight from the podcast, Dr. Cloud talks about why relationships require togetherness and separateness. You might have attachment issues, or anxiety issues. You might interpret separateness as abandonment. You might be feeling controlled because you don't have enough personal time. Start by asking yourself if you’re spending too much time together, or too much time apart. If you don’t have any togetherness, you don’t have a relationship. If you don’t have any separateness, you’re enme...
May 18, 2022•16 min•Season 1Ep. 349
In this highlight from the podcast, Dr. Cloud talks about how damaging triangulation can be in relationships. Triangulation is a common and often destructive problem in relationships in families, friendships, working relationships. When a conflict arises between two people, a third party is often brought in, unintentionally or intentionally, to ease the tension and pain. We’re not talking about professional counseling here or having a third person there for the conversation. That's one thing. Bu...
May 13, 2022•13 min•Season 1Ep. 348
In this highlight from the show, Dr. Cloud talks about our automatic tendencies in conflicts. Our default tendencies aren’t always so productive, fruitful or stellar. Sometimes they stem from conflicts or trauma and often do us a disservice. Dr. Cloud talks Dr. Karen Horney’s way of breaking down these tendencies into categories. Our automatic tendencies fall into one of three modes: Moving Towards, Moving Against, and Moving Away. The first step is figuring out what your default tendency is, an...
May 11, 2022•15 min•Season 1Ep. 347
In this highlight Dr. Cloud talks about the path to finding peace. When we know we’re right in a conflict, it’ll often prevent us from making peace with the other party. How can we be bigger people and begin the process of reconciliation? You’re not just doing it for their sake, you’re doing it for yours too. Got a narcissist in your life? Not sure what to do? Then you're in luck! We have an upcoming workshop on Narcissism on June 28th at 5pm Pacific! If you can't attend live, don't worry, you c...
May 07, 2022•17 min•Season 1Ep. 346
In this short highlight from the podcast, Dr. Cloud addresses the old saying that a person's character becomes their destiny. It's often the little things, the small decisions, that over time become our habits. These habits become patterns, which become our identity and character. Got a narcissist in your life? Not sure what to do? Then you're in luck! We have an upcoming workshop on Narcissism on June 28th at 5pm Pacific! If you can't attend live, don't worry, you can stream the recording as mu...
May 05, 2022•16 min•Season 1Ep. 345
In this highlight from from the podcast, Dr. Cloud talks about why we need to practice gratitude to lead our best life. Psychologists researching happiness have found that practicing gratitude is crucial for a happy and fulfilling life. So how can we do it more often and more meaningfully? Got a narcissist in your life? Not sure what to do? Then you're in luck. We have an upcoming workshop on Narcissism on June 28th at 5pm Pacific! If you can't attend live, don't worry, you can stream the record...
Apr 30, 2022•27 min•Season 1Ep. 344
In this highlight from the podcast Dr. Cloud talks about how automatic thoughts are different from normal thinking. These automatic thoughts greatly affect our mood and outlook on life. So how can we avoid the spiral of negative thinking that they often cause? Got a narcissist in your life? Not sure what to do? Then you're in luck. We have an upcoming workshop on Narcissism on June 28th at 5pm Pacific! If you can't attend live, don't worry, you can stream the recording as much as you like.Early ...
Apr 28, 2022•21 min•Season 1Ep. 343
In this short highlight from the podcast Dr. Cloud talks about the importance of getting back to what really matters in life. We often find ourselves stressed out about the wrong things. Reprioritizing and remembering what matters gets us back on track. Got a narcissist in your life? Not sure what to do? Then you're in luck. We have an upcoming workshop on Narcissism on June 28th at 5pm Pacific! If you can't attend live, don't worry, you can stream the recording as much as you like. Early bird p...
Apr 23, 2022•16 min•Season 1Ep. 342
In this highlight from The Dr. Cloud Show, how can we become more comfortable with anger? Anger isn’t correct in anything other than signaling that something is wrong. When we can see that it's a signal to investigate, rather than an instruction to respond we can react well. Got a narcissist in your life? We have an upcoming workshop on Narcissism on June 28th at 5pm Pacific! Early bird pricing is available for a limited time. To find out more about it go to Boundaries.me/Narcissism . Get a free...
Apr 19, 2022•18 min•Season 1Ep. 341
In this short from The Dr. Cloud Show, forgiveness does not require us trusting someone to give it. Forgiveness is free, trust is earned. We often get hung up thinking that forgiving someone means that we'll trust them again. They're not the same thing. Got a narcissist in your life? We have an upcoming workshop on Narcissism on June 28th at 5pm Pacific! Early bird pricing is available for a limited time. To find out more about it go to Boundaries.me/Narcissism . Get a free 14 day trial to Bound...
Apr 15, 2022•20 min•Season 1Ep. 340
In this short highlight from The Dr. Cloud Show, what can we do to break the cycle of guilt? There is self-condemnation that keeps us stuck, and there’s remorse that can move us forward. The big delusion is that guilt keeps people in check, and it doesn’t. It makes them act out more and keeps the cycle going. It doesn’t help. Dr. Cloud's upcoming workshop Mentally Healthy Faith is a two hour workshop covering how your mental health and your spiritual life intertwine. It’s live on April 12th at 5...
Apr 11, 2022•19 min•Season 1Ep. 339
