1 Corinthians 7:12-17 - What to Do if Your Spouse Isn't a Christian

>> Jen: Good morning, friends and faith listeners. Thanks for tuning into the Bible explain podcast to share a cup of coffee with me as we discuss first Corinthians seven. I'm really excited to talk about today's portion of scripture because all of first Corinthians seven, actually in general, is a chapter that people struggle with because it talks about biblical marriage, it talks about the roles between men and women, it talks about slavery, even, which is what we're going to get into today.

So I'm excited to delve into this, but before we do, don't forget that tomorrow there is no episode unless you are a member on Ko Fi. Right now, the members and I are going through the book of psalms, and I do have an exciting announcement about

that. Originally, I was putting all of my members only content on YouTube, but now I have a separate podcast platform specifically for members, which is going to be so much easier for everybody so they don't have to click on a YouTube video and watch a stupid ad before they get into, um, the podcast episode. So I have a whole separate podcast specifically for members, which I am very, very excited about. All of that information

is on Ko Fi. So if you're interested in joining in on the Friday podcast episodes, then please become a Ko fi member over on Ko Fi. Now, for those of you who are t tier members, I did recently put out a discussions episode with my sister and I. It was in person, which was really exciting for me. The audio quality was not the best, but that's because we were sitting outside in a very busy neighborhood. But otherwise, it was still a really good

episode. And I just recorded a discussions episode with my mom that I'll be putting up as well, which is also in person. And we are going to be talking about some of the principles of first corinthians seven. So the discussions episodes are available to all the members on Ko Fi, but the Friday podcast episodes are only available for those of you who are Ko fi tier members over on Ko

Fi. So check out those two tiers that I have listed if you are interested in gaining access to either discussions or the Friday podcast episodes. But let's get into first Corinthians 712 through 24 today, and I'll be talking out, uh, of w eb, as I always do. But of course, grab your favorite version of the Bible and also your cup of coffee or your cup of tea this

morning. I've got a nice cup of peppermint tea here that I'm sipping on, so make sure to grab yours as we read, uh, first corinthians seven, once again, twelve, uh, through 24. But to the rest I, not the Lord, say, if any brother has an unbelieving wife, and she is content to live with him, let him not leave her. The woman who has an unbelieving husband, and he is content to live with her, let her not leave her husband. For the unbelieving husband is sanctified in the wife, and the

unbelieving wife is sanctified in the husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean. But now they are holy. Yet if the unbeliever departs, let there be a separation. The brother or the sister is not under bondage in such cases. But God has called us to live in peace. For how do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife? Only as the Lord has distributed to each man, as God has called

each, let him walk. So I command in all the assemblies, was anyone called having been circumcised? Let him not become uncircumcised. Has anyone been called in uncircumcision? Let him not become circumcised. Circumcision is nothing, and uncircumcision is nothing but the keeping of the commandments of God. Let each man stay in that calling in which he was called. Were you called to being a bondservant? Don't let that bother you. But if you get an opportunity to become free, use

it for he who is called in the Lord. Being a bondservant is the Lord's free man. Likewise, he who was called before free is Christ's Bondservanthenne. You were bought with a price. Don't become bondservants of men, brothers. Let each man, in whatever condition he was called, stay in that condition with God. Man. Now that I'm reading through all of these verses, I bet you I could talk about each one of them for like, 20 minutes a piece.

But I usually try to keep my episodes around 20 minutes long, so we'll see how I do today. But to start out on Tuesday, my husband and I were on the podcast, and we talked about the first part of first Corinthians 7:1-11. We talked about how Paul was specifically addressing christian marriages. Not unchristian marriages, not marriages where one person is a Christian and one person is an atheist. Nothing like that. Christian

marriages. And now Paul addresses in verses twelve through 17, mixed marriages, meaning one person is a Christian and the other person is not. He says to the rest, meaning mixed marriages. I, not the Lord, say, if any brother has an unbelieving wife, and she is content to live with him. Let him not leave her. I first want to talk about what Paul says here at the beginning of this verse, where he says, I, not the Lord, say, now, some people will take this to be like, oh, you

know, Paul is using his own words here. So these are not inspired words from God. I don't believe that's the case. All of God's word is inspired. Paul was a very humble person, as we know. He probably didn't even realize how inspired he was to write down these words. God never had spoken about this particular topic before, and Jesus never spoke about it while he was on earth. They never talked about a relationship where one person was a Christian

and one wasn't. ... And the reason God never spoke about it before was because Christianity didn't come around until Jesus. In the Old Testament, God had given the jewish people, his people, very specific instructions for marriage. But because Christianity didn't come until after Jesus died and rose again for our sins, God never spoke about a marriage between two Christians or a, uh, non Christian and a Christian. He never spoke about that because he didn't need to yet, because

christians weren't around yet. So now God is inspiring Paul to talk about this issue because it's coming up as a problem. You know, throughout all of the ages, people have been converting to Christianity. And what happens when they convert to Christianity but their spouse does not convert to Christianity? What do they do in that situation? Because marriage is a really, really important thing in our lives,

obviously. So God is inspiring Paul to talk about this, and Paul, in his humility, is like, this is my words, not God's. So he says to the rest, I say, if any brother has an unbelieving wife and she is content to live with him, let him not leave her. You know, there's an Old Testament story in the book of Ezra, which is one of the minor prophets, where Ezra is so upset because the jewish men of his time period went and married I pagan

women. And the book ends with Ezra encouraging these men to divorce their wives. And the men overwhelmingly agree. They're like, you know what? You are right. We are going to divorce our pagan wives. And it actually says at the very end of the book, and some of these women had borne them children, it also says there were only three people, three men, who disagreed with all of this. Only three men were like, no, I don't want to divorce my pagan wife.

Everyone else was like, yes, we will do this. So throughout history, this has been a question, what do I do? When I start following God, but yet my spouse does not. And Paul answers the question right here. He says, I say to you, if any brother has an unbelieving wife and she is content to live with him, let him not leave her. The woman who has an unbelieving husband, and he is content to live with her, let her not leave her husband. So Paul answers the question right there. He says,

you don't leave them. You don't leave them because they are not a Christian. That is against God. He says instead, because one person in that family is a Christian, the entire family actually becomes, in a way, holy. Verse 14. For the unbelieving husband is sanctified in the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified in the husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean. But now

they are holy. This does not mean that the husband automatically, like, attains salvation if his wife is a Christiane. Yet he is not. That is not what Paul is talking about here. Instead, he is saying, because one person in that family is a Christian, God's hand of protection is on that family. This brings me to psalm, chapter 37, verses 23 through 29. And this is a psalm of David, who talks about the family of believers. Verse 23. A man's steps are established

by Yahweh. He delights in his way. Though he stumble, he shall not fall. For Yahweh holds him up with his hand. I have been young, and now I am old, yet I have not seen the righteous forsaken, nor his children begging for bread all day long. He deals graciously in lends. His offspring is blessed, depart from evil and do good, live securely forever. For Yahweh loves justice and doesnt forsake his saints. They are preserved forever. But the children of the wicked shall

be cut off. The righteous shall inherit the land and live in it forever. So Paul, in first Corinthians seven, is not saying that because one spouse is a Christian, that makes the entire family Christian, even though that is kind of the idea even nowadays. You know, people often think that because they were raised in a christian household, because one of their parents was Christian, that that automatically makes them a Christian. That is not true. Christianity is a personal, uh,

acceptance of Christ. It's not just something you're born into like other religions. This is something you have to take the step on by yourself. But what Paul is saying here, though, is that because a christian belongs to that family, God is going to put his hand of protection on that family. Kind of like what psalm 37, verse 25, says here, I have not seen the righteous forsaken nor his children begging for bread. So because of one person, God will often bless an entire family. We see this

actually throughout history of the Bible. For example, think about Joseph the slave. Way back in the book of Genesis, one of my favorite stories in the Bible, Joseph was a believer in Yahweh. He got sold by his own brothers into Egypt. But because Joseph believed in God, and even though he was a slave, God blessed Joseph so much that he became the head

slave. And then once Joseph became the head slave, God started blessing that entire family because of Joseph, even though that entire family did not believe in Yahweh. God blessed that entire family because of one person. And God often does that. That is what Paul's point is here. But then he ends this on a very positive note. He says, here's the other reason why a christian spouse should not divorce a non christian spouse for how do you know wife whether you will save your husband?

Or how do you know husband whether you will save your wife? A christian wife can potentially save her husband through her actions. Peter also talks about this in, I think it's one Peter. He talks about how women of old, like women of the Old Testament, would show themselves beautiful in the eyes of God through their actions. And these actions would often

resonate with the husbands. So christian wives can show the love of Christ to their husbands, and their husbands, through the example of their wives, might actually accept Christ, and vice versa, of course, as well. A husband through example can show that he is a changed man and possibly cause his wife to come to salvation

herself. But in the situation where two people are married, one is a Christian, one is not, and the person who is not the Christian decides they want to leave the marriage either because they don't like Christianity or because of some other reason. Paul actually says, let that person go. Verse 15. If the unbeliever departs, let there be separation. The brother or the sister is not under bondage in such cases, but God has called us in

peace. So Paul goes so far to say that if one person in this marriage relationship wants to get a divorce, the other person now is no longer in bondage of marriage, and God has called that person to peace. I'm sure that there are plenty of situations in Corinth and throughout all of history where somebody becomes a Christian in a marriage relationship and the other person hates Christianity so much that they choose to leave that marriage. That means that God has called that Christian to live in

peace. It might be very difficult for the spouse to just walk out like that. But ultimately, it will produce peace in your life instead of having to live in a bad relationship with somebody that absolutely hates your faith. So Paul says, let that person go if they want to get divorced. Now, of course, one caveat to all of this is that it's clear in other portions of scripture that somebody who is a Christian should not marry somebody who is not a Christian. That's called being unequally yoked.

You know, a yoke, back in the days of Paul was something that you would, you know, stick on the necks of animals to, like, keep them together so that they could plow your fields or whatever, and nobody in their right mind would ever put, like, an ox with a donkey and put them in the same yoke and have

them, like, plow the fields together. No one would do that because that's placing an unneeded burden on the donkey, and then the ox is being slowed down by the donkey, and, you know, they're just two totally different animals. Instead, you would place two oxen inside of that yoke. The Bible says that when we get married, we need to be very careful of who we choose for our spouse, because we don't want to be in a situation where we have to

compromise our faith for our spouse. We also don't want to be in a situation where we put our spouse in uncomfortable situations that they don't want to be in because of our faith. So, in general, it's more loving, and it's just better overall if we find somebody who has the same faith that we do from the very beginning, because it's just going to cause all lot less trouble in the long run. If you're going to get married, find someone who has the

same faith that you do. And that doesn't mean that you need to believe in every single thing exactly the same, or that you need to have the exact same, you know, personality or, uh, interests or something like that. That's not what that means. It just means you need to find somebody who wants to have an active faith in Yahweh, and their faith is truly genuine. Now, all of this, though, he says to conclude in verse 17 only as the Lord has distributed to each man, as God has called each,

let him walk. So I command in all the assemblies. In other words, whatever situation you find yourself in, be content in that situation, and just try to please God bless in that situation. Don't try to change your circumstances. Don't try to divorce your wife or your husband. Just live in peace, because that is

what God bless has called you to live in. So if you find yourself married to somebody who is a non Christian but they are content to live in that situation with you, then you should also be content because that is what God bless has called you to. But in the opposite sense, if you find yourself in a marriage relationship where you're a Christian and your spouse isn't, and they hate your faith and they decide to leave, then God bless has called you to peace and you should be content

in that situation. Paul is not talking about extremes here. I should just mention that he is not talking about somebody who is wildly abusive in a marriage relationship or sexually abusive to children or just doing something crazy like that. There are other passages, scripture that talk about those things. This is just talking about a marriage relationship between two people, one that is a Christian

and one that is not a Christian. But honestly, the heart of all of this is that we should be doing our best, whatever situation we find ourselves in, to live in a way that honors God. And obviously marriage does honor God because that was the first institute that God put in place. When he created Adam and Eve, he married them. When he created Adam and Eve, he married them. So God loves marriage. He loves it because it's a picture of unity, a unity between God and the church.

God bless often calls himself the husband of the church and the church is the bride of Christ. And so marriage is a picture of God. And God wants us to honor that picture as best as we possibly can in whatever situation we find ourselves in. And for those of you on the podcast that are listening, that are christians and have a spouse that is not a Christian, which is very common, I encourage you to pray for your

spouse every single day. I encourage you to read your Bible and live in a way that is honoring to God. Because like Paul says here, you never know if your spouse is going to become saved because of you. You never know. You never know how God is working on their hearts. Now, I'm actually thinking about ending the episode there because 18 through 24 is going to get a lot more in depth about circumcision and also slavery.

So I might actually just end the episode here and talk about all of this on Tuesday. So, faithful listeners, I hope that you enjoyed today's episode as we discussed more about marriage relationships. If you did like the episode, please rate it and write a nice little review on Apple Podcasts or whatever listening platform you are on, because that is how people are going to find the podcast