The Art of Charm is where self-motivated people, just like you, come to learn from the company’s coaches about to how to master human dynamics, relationships, and becoming your best self with the help of Johnny and AJ, the company’s founders. Johnny and AJ bring their 11 years of coaching experience from their famous Bootcamps, where they host clients in Los Angeles from all over the world and they share their stories, best practices and themselves on this weekly podcast. Not only does The Art of Charm help everyday people, including active members of the military, learn how to become higher performers, better spouses, partners, and coworkers, they dig deep into human behavior, the science behind it, and demystify what we do and why we do it.
Angela Duckworth (@angeladuckw) is a professor of psychology at the University of Pennsylvania, founder of the non-profit Character Lab, and author of Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance. The Cheat Sheet: Why we shouldn't label others as talented. Why our potential is one thing -- and what we do with it is another. How to focus on high-level goals. When to give up -- and when to be stubborn. How to grow our grit and perseverance. And so much more... Show notes at http://theartofcharm.com...
Jason McCarthy (@GORUCK) teaches lessons focused on problem solving and rapport building related to "Charming the Snake," a way of life for Green Berets that works in war, business, and love. The Cheat Sheet: What does GORUCK mean? Where does the term "charming the snake" originate? Why is it more efficacious to charm the metaphorical snake rather than kill it? What are the stages of rapport building that are important for charming the snake? It's not really possible to overcommunicate. And so m...
Welcome to the seventh episode of Minisode Monday! If You're so Smart, Why Aren't You Happy? author and recent guest Raj Raghunathan joins us to talk about the benefits of kindness and giving. Here's what's up today: The Cheat Sheet: Kindness and giving are good for us. Pessimists can point to numerous reasons that humans seem to be programmed for selfishness and greed, but research suggests we're equally (if not more so) hard-wired for generosity. A study with non-socialized toddlers found a co...
Time for Fan Mail Friday, where we'll be answering your questions and dropping some knowledge and feedback to help you kick the weekend off right. Let's cut to it! In this episode: Is it fair to assess someone's character and integrity from a small incident that appears to be inconsequential? When does a benevolent Band of Brothers (as discussed in Episode 460 with Stephen Mansfield: Building a Band of Brothers) become a corrupt Old Boys Network? Where do we stand on "the power of positive think...
Amy Herman (@AmyHermanAOP) helps people from across the professional spectrum enhance their observation and perception skills by learning to look at works of art in her Art of Perception course. Her new book, Visual Intelligence: Sharpen Your Perception, Change Your Life is available now. The Cheat Sheet: Discover why Amy discourages use of the words "obviously," "clearly," "always," and "never." The Four As: assess, analyze, articulate, act. Learn the difference between short-term situational a...
General Michael Hayden (@GenMhayden) is a retired United States Air Force general, former Director of the NSA and CIA, and author of Playing to the Edge: American Intelligence in the Age of Terror. The Cheat Sheet: How does an intelligence agent view cognition, cognitive bias, and psychology differently from a policy maker? What is The Unpleasant Fact an intelligence agent brings to the briefing table? General Hayden gives us a rare glimpse of working for two very different presidents and convey...
Welcome to the sixth episode of Minisode Monday! We keep finding so many useful tactics and tips that we want to share with you, but they don't fit into the format of a regular show -- hence, Minisode Monday. Here's what's up today: The Cheat Sheet: Loneliness is the discrepancy between your desired level of social contact with what you actually achieve. Loneliness is that contradiction between how we want to feel versus what we actually experience -- and it opens up a weird emptiness within us....
Time for Fan Mail Friday, where we'll be answering your questions and dropping some knowledge and feedback to help you kick the weekend off right. Let's cut to it! In this episode: How do you maintain a healthy mind and keep improving yourself when there are a lot of problems in the immediate family that no one has control over? [Answer: 01:55] A listener gives us his take on ego (as recently discussed in AoC episode 519: Ego Is the Enemy with Ryan Holiday). [Answer: 06:23] Still another listene...
Tim Urban (@waitbutwhy) of Wait But Why tells us how to build good patterns for defeating chronic procrastination and gain control over our own lives. The Cheat Sheet: Telling someone afflicted with chronic procrastination not to procrastinate is like telling someone with clinical depression to just be happier: it doesn't work. The chronic procrastinator experiences a constant struggle between their inner rational thinker -- who sees the future and understands the value of goals and hard work --...
Jocko Willink (@jockowillink), commander for the most highly decorated special operations unit of the Iraq War, joins the show to talk about taking responsibility, discipline, intensity, and leadership to the next level as outlined in Extreme Ownership: How U.S. Navy SEALs Lead and Win. The Cheat Sheet: When making a decision, worrying about variables that can't be controlled is a waste of time. A better outcome is likely if we learn to focus otherwise wasted effort on factors that can be contro...
Welcome to the fifth episode of Minisode Monday, where we'll talk about testing our assumptions! We keep finding so many useful tactics and tips that we want to share with you, but they don't fit into the format of a regular show -- hence, Minisode Monday. Here's what's up today: The Cheat Sheet: Give someone who remembers WWII an iPod or comparable modern media player and they may not be able to wrap their brains around how it can store so much music and other content. Maybe because they used t...
Time for Fan Mail Friday, where we'll be answering your questions and dropping some knowledge and feedback to help you kick the weekend off right. Let's cut to it! In this episode: If a partner is going through therapy and the 12 steps for recovery from alcoholism -- and doing well -- is it reasonable to worry they might have a relapse because of their "proven" addictive personality? What causes someone not to take an opportunity -- even when they have an offer that would vastly improve their li...
Hines Ward (@mvp86hinesward) is a two-time Super Bowl champion and MVP of Super Bowl XL. He joins us to talk about how, in spite of just turning 40, he's just getting started. The Cheat Sheet: Hard work beats talent when talent doesn't work hard. By carving out his own niche in the game of football, Hines Ward proved he didn't have to be the tallest and fastest in the NFL to excel. How can someone in the spotlight stay positive even when faced with bouts of external negativity? In preparation fo...
Ryan Holiday (@ryanholiday), author of Ego Is the Enemy, talks about how learning to put our higher goals above a desire for recognition leads us to true accomplishment. The Cheat Sheet: What is the ego? When does the ego go from being a fundamental part of our existence to an all-destroying enemy? What are the downfalls of ego (and how can we avoid them)? Learn how aspiration, success, and failure are influenced by ego. Understand the delicate relationship between ego and envy. And so much more...
Welcome to the fourth episode of Minisode Monday! We keep finding so many useful tactics and tips that we want to share with you, but they don't fit into the format of a regular show -- hence, Minisode Monday. The Cheat Sheet: Off the top of your head, think of something for which you're grateful. It can be anything -- from a passion for teaching others to having a strong circle of friends to having a good job to loving where you live. Anything. In what ways does this thing for which you're grat...
Time for Fan Mail Friday, where we'll be answering your questions and dropping some knowledge and feedback to help you kick the weekend off right. Kimberly Seltzer (as featured in our Toolbox for Women episodes) joins us for this one, so let's cut to it! In this episode: Dating when you've been diagnosed with herpes can be tough. When is the time right to tell prospective partners? Too early, and you may be seen as presumptuous. But if you wait until things start getting serious, they may be ang...
Raj Raghunathan (@Rajadon), author of If You're so Smart, Why Aren't You Happy?, examines why happiness often eludes us in all walks of life -- no matter how healthy, wealthy, or wise we seem to others. The Cheat Sheet: The very things that make people smart and successful can, paradoxically, get in the way of happiness. The typical education, no matter how extensive (or expensive), doesn't give us instructions for how to be happy. Are millennials naturally better equipped for happiness than eld...
Adam Grant (@AdamMGrant), author of Originals: How Non-Conformists Move the World, revisits the show to explain how defying conformity gives us the power to change the world instead of just accepting it as it is. The Cheat Sheet: Great creators don't necessarily have the deepest level of expertise. Question the default instead of taking the status quo for granted. Learn how to triple the number of ideas you generate. Procrastinate strategically. Balance your risk portfolio. And so much more... S...
Welcome to the third episode of Minisode Monday! We keep finding so many useful tactics and tips that we want to share with you, but they don't fit into the format of a regular show -- hence, Minisode Monday. The Cheat Sheet: When you're traveling around the world, communication can get tricky. You may not have time to master multiple foreign languages, but you can brush up on your nonverbal communication skills before catching a ride to the airport. While cultural differences are inevitable, ma...
Time for Fan Mail Friday, where we'll be answering your questions and dropping some knowledge and feedback to help you kick the weekend off right. Let's cut to it! In this episode: You've resolved to make big changes in your life -- but how do you prioritize them or even find a place to start? Is it possible to be oversaturated with good advice? We share more excellent listener advice for making a transition from the military to civilian office life as discussed in Fan Mail Friday #61. Dr. Duana...
Rob Norman (@robthenorman), co-host of The Backline podcast and author of Improvising Now, explains how we can use techniques from improvisational theater to conquer everyday life challenges. The Cheat Sheet: Improvisational theater skills go far beyond just helping us think quickly on our feet. In improv, as in all spontaneous life experiences, failure is a possible outcome. Sharpening improv skills gets us not only to overcome our fear of failure, but to learn from it. Learn how the "yes...and...
Cal Newport revisits the show to talk about deep work and how focus can make you not only more productive and effective, but happier and more neurologically healthy. The Cheat Sheet: What's the difference between shallow work and deep work? Why is engaging in deep work so important not only to personal satisfaction, but to your very survival in a ruthless marketplace? Learn how to schedule deep work into your own life. Discover what you can eliminate from your life to make deep work more natural...
Welcome to the second episode of Minisode Monday! We keep finding so so many useful tactics and tips that we want to share with you, but they don't fit into the format of a regular show -- hence, Minisode Monday. The Cheat Sheet: How can you start reading people quickly? When observing someone, try to remember more than appearance-based traits. Noticing more than superficial features hones your judgment and makes you more observant in a deeper way. Pay attention to how your favorite writers desc...
Time for Fan Mail Fridays, where we'll be answering your questions and dropping some knowledge and feedback to help you kick the weekend off right. In this episode: Is there a polite way to snap your friend out of a need for attention from the opposite sex and get them to see they're awesome as they are? Why is it sometimes so hard to stay away from people we clearly know are wrong for us -- like the narcissists Kim Seltzer has discussed on the show before? A relationship seems to be going well ...
Sam Harris (@samharrisorg) is a neuroscientist, author, and philosopher; he's also a staunch critic of religion (while being an advocate of mindfulness) who joins the show to discuss some views that -- fair warning -- many may find controversial. The Cheat Sheet: When does stubbornness stop being a virtue and become a confession of intellectual dishonesty? What makes Sam Harris the Anti-Trump? Why do so many people subscribe to the package beliefs of their political parties or religions even whe...
Dr. Anders Ericsson (@PeakTheBook) is the expert in finding out what it takes to become an expert. Here, he discusses Peak: Secrets from the New Science of Expertise, his new book co-authored with Robert Pool. The Cheat Sheet: Innate talent is a myth. How can we become amazing at any skill? Learn how to set up a deliberate practice regimen to become more effective at anything you do. Understand why "try differently" is a better solution than "try harder." Contrary to what was once believed, the ...
Welcome to the first episode of Minisode Monday! We keep finding so so many useful tactics and tips that we want to share with you, but they don't fit into the format of a regular show -- hence, Minisode Monday. But don't worry! We'll still present the regular number of full-sized episodes every week, but the schedule will look more like this: Monday -- Minisode Monday Tuesday -- Full-sized episode #1 Wednesday -- Break Thursday -- Full-sized episode #2 Friday -- Fan Mail Friday It's good news; ...
Time for Fan Mail Fridays, where we'll be answering your questions and dropping some knowledge and feedback to help you kick the weekend off right. In this episode: If men are the gas and women are the brakes (per guest Emily Nagoski in The Art of Charm podcast episode 414), how does this apply in a marriage that fizzles out in the sex department? Are you a better teacher than a performer of a certain skill? What does it say about you when your students constantly surpass your level of expertise...
Linda Carroll returns to discuss the five stages of lasting love, including the initial "merge" phase driven by brain chemistry, the subsequent power struggle, and the importance of navigating disillusionment. She offers strategies for recognizing destructive patterns, understanding personal vulnerabilities, and breaking free from negative loops to achieve long-term relationship success.
Dr. Melanie Watkins (@MWatkinsMD) is a psychiatrist who emphasizes the importance of making mental health a priority by minimizing the mystery -- and sometimes the misery -- of mental illness and addiction treatment. The Cheat Sheet: Maintaining mental health is as serious as maintaining physical health -- and there should be no shame in seeking help for either. What signs commonly signal a need to seek help from a mental health professional? Central nervous system depressants abused as an alter...
