And energy. Cancel the high ecstasyag Cancelgema. It's not sorry, Andy, What the positive bitches? How are we doing today? If you're hearing this episode, then you are meant to be here, So keep listening on that Bitch's Positive Podcast. Sometimes we will laugh, other times, bib a girl, We're gonna cry, but we will always walk away feeling our most empowered, positive bitch self. That is Babe in true connection with herself. On this podcast, we unbecome who we are not so we can fully step into
exactly who we came here to be. Today, we're talking about something very revolutionary because in a world it is society that teaches us to not think for ourselves, in a society that teaches us to hate ourselves and to follow the herd, we are talking about the most revolutionary thing you can do, which is show up as authentically your self and doing it unapologetically. That's right now. If you're thinking, CC, I don't really know who I am,
don't worry, because that is something we discuss. You're going to learn how to discover yourself, how to let old versions of you go, and how to be so confident and unapologetic in who you are that you are going to be the most magnetic version of yourself you maybe have ever met. Before we get into it, a couple of announcements. My book Show Up as Her is coming out April thirtieth, and you can pre order this book right now. The link will be in the show notes. If anything I've ever said
has helped you, please support the launch of this book. Every single chapter is about how to take back your power from a different aspect of your life. Whether that's taking your power back from people, or your past or your ego. You will learn how to do all of that and more in my book, Show Up as Her. I impressed upon the pages of this book positive energy. So just by getting this book, just by having it in your hands and really engaging with it, you are fine tuning your energy.
If you want more intimate guidance, you can DM me on Instagram at vibein with CC. Be sure to follow me there. That link will also be in the show notes. I have some offerings open currently in my Magnetic Mastery program. I opened it up to five spots and I currently have three spots left open. In my Magnetic Mastery Program. This is a twelve week program where It's not a one size fits all program, which I see a lot
of people doing. I equate this program to the perfectly tailored little black dress. I meet you where you're at, and we will go spirit deep. Whatever you need to uncover, whatever you need to release, we will do that thing. It is nothing short of energetic work, psychological work, even physical somatic healing. We do it all. If you're interested in this twelve week program, dom me now for more information and without further ado, let's
just get into today's episode. How can we be unapologetically our self? Well, let's think about why we might not be unapologetically ourself When we have learned since we have been born that we have to get validation and love and acceptance from outside of ourselves. We never learn how to cultivate and harness those tools within our own being, So we rely on our mom our friends, our peers to validate us, to accept us, to like us, to give
us that love and whatever we starve for outside of our self. That now means that we're living in accordance to somebody else. It means we're putting them on our pedestal and not ourself. If we have grown up being versions of ourself in order to get love and acceptance. Well, that's how we know how to exist. That's all we know how to do. We only know how to show up in a way that makes other people comfortable. What we have to do is drastically and radically change the way we show up every single
day. And what does this mean. This means that instead of getting your validation and acceptance and love and like from out there, you have to now give it to your self. Just think about it. If I don't know how to give myself love, validation, respect, and trust, I'm going to be starving for those energies outside of myself. I'm not going to show up how I actually want to show up. I'm going to show up how
I think I have to show up to get those needs met. If you are afraid of being yourself, it means you're starving yourself a fulfilling your own needs. So first things first is we have to alter where we're going to get our needs met. Instead of going out there, instead of begging people out there to meet our needs, we have to meet our own needs. When you wake up in the morning, you have a decision every single day,
do I want to keep being the same person I was yesterday? Or do I want to wake up today take my life by their reins and take control over my own reality. Every day you have that invitation, how are you responding? How are you responding? May I ask you if you want to be unapologetically yourself? First things first, we have to understand we need to start meeting our own needs. This means we have to ask ourselves, how can I validate myself? Oh, I can give myself positive words of
affirmations throughout my day. When I do that, workout, good job, CEC. When I make my bed, good job, CEC. At work, great job, CEC. Start validating yourself. If I'm starving for love outside of myself, how can I give that to me? Well, I can give myself self love by giving myself a beautiful, nice bath. I'll put epsom salt in there, lower the lights, light a candle, I'll
watch one of my favorite movies from childhood. We have to start learning how to meet our own needs, so we're not just trying to survive in the every day, but we open up the honor opportunity to actually thrive. If you don't rely on their acceptance and their validation. Well, then you're not tethered to them and you can do what you want. A lot of us have to simply give ourselves permission to show up as we wish. We've been told you're too sensitive, you can't do that. Now you're not allowed to
exist as that. So we have to start telling ourselves. I give myself permission to feel how I want to feel. I give myself permission to show up however I wish to show up. I give myself permission to be who it is I want to be. I give myself permission to do what it is I want to do. We have been conditioned to look to the other
and think, is this okay? Am I allowed to do this? F that you want to live unapologetically, you have to fulfill your own needs, and you have to give yourself literally permission to show up as who it is you wish to be. Maybe you're thinking, I don't even know who I want to be. I don't even know who I am. When I was going through my breakup, I realized, oh mg, I have no identity
outside of being a girlfriend. I don't know who I am. I don't know what I like to do. I don't know what to do with myself. So what that means. It's not a bad thing. It's actually a positive sign that you need to learn about yourself. It's a sign that you're about to have a journey very very very differently than any journey you've had prior. You're about to embark on a journey of self discovery. Not knowing yourself is not a bad thing. It just means, Okay, it's time to
rediscover. How do we get to know anyone? We have to hang out with them. You have to commit to yourself time and energy. You have to spend time with Yeah, you if you want to get to know you, if you want to be unapologetically yourself. You can't be yourself if you don't even know who you are. What are you going to do in the time that you're hanging out with yourself? You're going to try new things. When I was going through this breakup, I didn't know what I liked to
do. So I asked myself, what are some things I think I might like? And I said, I think I might like yoga. So what did I do? I bought the yoga matt. I bought a yoga bag, and that bag stayed in my room for about a month until I actually signed up. I needed a little bit more momentum to get used to the idea of maybe I could be a yogi. After that month, I signed up for that first class, and it changed my life. I never stopped yoga. I never stopped it. I would have never known I liked yoga
because my mom didn't do it, my sister didn't do it. No one in my family did it. I didn't know anyone who did it. I had to go and find out for myself through experimenting with my own reality. You are a scientist, and your life is your experiment. View this time of self discovery as simply an experiment. Don't put pressure on yourself, don't put time limits on yourself. Just say what do I think I might like, and let me go try it. Another thing I thought I might like
is self development books. So I started to read them. I started to get interested in them. I thought I hated reading. I thought that's who I was. It wasn't a fact that I hated reading. It was a thought that I practiced thinking, which became a belief, and I believed that belief. Part of becoming unapologetically yourself is also unbecoming all the parts of you that aren't in alignment with you anymore, that were never actually g but behaviors
you have learned in order to survive. So this means releasing the habits, the people, the places that don't feel good to you anymore. How do you know if something's in alignment with you, it will feel good, it will feel like peace. Do you I know something's not in alignment with you, It will feel so difficult. It will feel uncomfortable, it will feel like misery, and it will never let up. Ever, it won't feel inspirational, you won't feel motivated. It will just feel like blah and gross.
The things that feel gross to you you have to release. I was trying for so long to force myself to be a sporty girl. That's not me. I was trying to force myself to do that so that I could hang out with people and be accepted by my peer group. But in releasing the sports, I finally actually had time to do what it is I wanted to do, which was acting and singing and dancing. Those were the things
that were really calling my name. And something so funny happens when you stop doing what you don't want to do, and you start doing what you do want to do, Suddenly you feel a whole lot better. So many of us think we're tired and depleted, and we feel like there's something wrong with us. You know, what's wrong with you is that you keep engaging in behaviors that aren't in alignment with you. So you constantly feel depleted, You
constantly feel tired, and you don't feel good about your incarnation. There's nothing wrong with you, but the habits and the activities and the people you're engaging with are no longer in alignment with you, and so they're draining you. You have to take a hard look at your life and say what actually feels good and what doesn't feel good. Your emotions are your navigation system, the same way you need a navigation system to show you how to get to a
place the first time you've ever been there. Look, this is the first time you're discovering this new version of you. You're going to need a navigation system. What is your navigation system, but your own emotions. Listen to them when they're showing you that something feels good, Lean into it. When they're showing you that something's not good for you, understand it and rough lease it. When you start doing things that make you feel happy and fulfilled,
you're no longer gonna have to outsource that validation. Who are the people who are most concerned about other people's opinions. It's people who do not know how to fill up their own cup. Do you think Taylor Swift really cares about all of her haters? No, she has so much money, so much happiness, so much abundance, so much joy, so much creativity, so much, so many things out of alignment. Really, she's living her dream life. No, she doesn't care about what other people have to say.
When you're in tune with yourself and what brings you joy, you care less about what other people say about you. Sometimes, your family, your friends, they're not gonna get it. They're not gonna get that vision, they're not gonna get your dream. They're gonna talk bad about you. They're gonna talk, maybe bad even to your face. You have to lean into yourself like never before. Who are you going to trust their vision or yours? Do you want to live miserable for the rest of your life? Do you
want to live in accordance with them? Do you want to give up your happiness and joy so that they feel comfortable? Or do you want to live the life you came here to live? Do you want to live the life that your destiny wants to gift you? What is it that you want to
do? It's in your power, your choice, your control. Being unapologetically yourself doesn't always feel comfortable because you're fighting against a role that you may have created, like the good girl, the making sure everyone else is comfortable, the making sure everyone else feels good around you. When you start to be unapologetically yourself and you change what you're projecting and what you're showing up as other people are going to shift how they react to you too, But you again
need to lean into yourself. What does it worth to you? Let's learn from the people who have come before us, shall we? Because one of the best ways to learn is to look at what other people are doing and understand what they did right, what worked, and what didn't work. The number one regret of the dying. Do you know what it is? The number one regret of the dying? This is it? I wish I had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected
of me. Out of millions of people, out of all the things people could regret, the number one thing they regretted is not being unapologetically themselves and instead trying to appease the people around them, trying to make everyone else comfortable. Guess what, You can try to appease as many people as you want around you, they still won't be happy with you. You know why, because happiness comes from within. Your happiness is your responsibility. Their happiness is
their responsibility. You were not sent to planet Earth to make everyone else happy. You came here to learn, develop and grow. Your energy is meant for you first, So why are you wasting it on everybody else? And yes, it is a waste. If you are so compassionate for other people, you have rose colored glasses on for everybody else, that's actually just leading you to self destruction. What do you even want from life? And maybe you're thinking, Ceci, I'm not sure who I am yet and I actually
don't know what I want from life. One of the best ways to understand what you want from your life is look at other people. What do other people have that you want that is now your inspo? Put it on a vision board. It's one of the most amazing ways that we can understand what we want is simply by looking around us, look at your surroundings. Sometimes we don't know we want that type of career or that type of car, or that type of home until we see someone else have it. Now,
don't get jealous of them. Don't start sending them hatred, because then you block yourself from manifesting that same thing. Instead, send appreciation, send gratitude, and understand if they could do it, that means I can do it too. If they're able to have their own business, they're a human, I'm a human. I can do it too. If they're able to have that home, with that family and that relationship, I'm a human. I
can do it too. It might not look the same in all the ways because I'm on my own personal spiritual journey, but if they can do it, so can I. I send them respect, I send them white light. I send them love. And when you see someone else having what you want and you realize I want to get this from myself too, Never send them jealousy or negativity. Send them white light, and it actually pulls that manifestation closer towards you. So if you're thinking I don't know who I am,
you know, okay, it's time to experiment. Experiment with new ways of being you think you might like, experiment with ways of being that you used to like when you were a child, but maybe stopped because you didn't want to be made fun of. I never, in school tried out for drama or any of the drama clubs because I put validation from my peers over my true, authentic desires. Our theater department was also questionable, but I
valued validation more than I valued true happiness. And what I got was friendships. But did they really ever fulfill me? No. I was constantly feeling like I want more, I'm ready for more. I want to feel more fulfilled, and I couldn't find that because I wasn't allowing myself to do what was truly going to bring me happiness. So try new things. Try to
reintroduce things you used to love to do. Also say yes more when people you out to new opportunities, instead of saying no and going back into your habitual way of being. Say you know what, Yeah, I'll try to go to that new concert, I'll try out that new food, I'll try to go to this new place. Let me see what happens. You have to make room for miracles to unfold in your life. You have to make room for new experiences to come into your life. You have to let go
of the control of everything. You, at the end of the day, cannot control how people are gonna view you and how people are gonna see you. You will be the villain in some people's story, but you know what, You're gonna be the freaking hero in your own. Maybe you're thinking, I've only ever known how to be the shy girl, the insecure girl, the quiet girl. And what I want you to understand is that your past does not have to equal your future. Your past does not have to equal
your present. Where you have been from doesn't have to have anything to do with where you want to go and where you're headed. We have to stop dragging our past into our present and our future, because our past has nothing to do with our future. If we don't want it to. You have the power to say, you know what, this identity isn't serving me anymore and I'm ready to be rebirthed into someone new. Think about the seasons we go from summer to fall, to winter to spring, to summer to fall.
The seasons are not judgmental of themselves for changing. We're not judgmental of the seasons for changing. We just know that's nature for you. Well, guess what. The law of one states that we are one with everything. There was this big bang and physically everything separated, but energetic everything is still entangled. That's a law of entanglement. We are still one with the planet, We are one with the trees. We are one with one other.
And just like nature has seasons, just like the moon has phases, you too will go through many different versions of your self. You don't have to stay stagnant, you don't have to stay in one identity. In fact, that goes against what you naturally are, which is energy, which is constantly shifting and moving. If you think about a midlife crisis, what even is
a midlife crisis? It's someone who decided who they had to be, tried to be that version of themselves in order to get loved their whole entire life, and then they realize that what they thought was going to give them happiness, placing other people on a pedestal, getting the house they thought was going to impress other people, keeping up with the Joneses didn't give them happiness. Nothing works, so they end up at the strip club at two aham.
I mean, yeah, that's some people's reality. Why Why Because they placed other people's validation over their own truest desires and they thought they had to keep up with the Joneses. They thought they had to get the house in the car and the da da da da to get external validation, and that was going to mean something, But it doesn't. What gives us permanent fulfillment is
following our true desires. That is what allows us to really step into our own Just because you've been a certain way, it doesn't mean you have to continuously be that person. You can say no to the f boy who keeps coming in and out of your life. You can say yes to that new job opportunity and try something different. You can sign up for that class and explore yourself. And remember, we're seeing this as an experiment. We're not
putting pressure on ourself. We're not putting a time limit on ourselves. We're just letting time flow through us, and we're working with the energy around us, not against it. I feel I'm going through yet another spiritual awakening right now, and it's requiring of me a lot of solitude, and so I've been planning to spend some time completely alone in Florida. And I'm doing this because I want to get to know the next version of myself that I feel
is emerging. And we know that if we want a different life, if we want to unlock a new level, it's going to require a new level of our self. And we can't just be interested in this process. We have to be completely committed to our self and our dream because that is what unlocks true happiness and our destiny. I am someone who's very much about I think I could say my biggest fear would be not reaching my full potential. And so for me place myself first and taking time to get to know myself
once again. I already did this. I've done this multiple times, and I'm still telling you yet again, I have to reget to know this next version of myself. Because there was CC who was the girlfriend, CC who went through a breakup, CC who had her first spiritual awakening, CEC who went through a dark night of the soul, CC who then was kind of this caterpillar in a cocoon and then rebirthed into a butterfly, CEC, who then was single, CEC who then went into a relationship again. And now
there is CC who's unlocking new spiritual levels of herself. And again, once again, I'm being required to step into myself. And now people have opinions about this. A lot of people have opinions about this. I've said this in previous episodes, but I've been getting asked the question, well, why aren't you engaged yet? You've been in a relationship for quite some time. Why aren't you doing this yet? You've been thinking about this for sometimes.
Why are you doing this? What is this? And my whole thing is, these people are not meant to live my life, so they actually don't need to understand why I'm doing what I'm doing. In fact, I don't care if I seem crazy or unhinged to them, because you know what, I don't want their reality. I don't want to become grounded in someone else's reality because I don't want their life. They are not gonna understand my way
of being because I'm unlocking a completely different reality. So of course they're not going to understand that I'm not just gonna graduate college and get married immediately and pop out children. They're not going to understand that because that's what their life looked like. And what do people want? People want to surround themselves with
other people that are like them because it makes them more comfortable. People want to surround themselves with people who are like them so that it's easy easier to predict how those people are going to act. We have to understand that when you're doing what other people aren't doing, it's going to make them uncomfortable. It's going to make them question their own life and they're not going to like it, so they are going to have opinions about it. But guess what
you have to have constantly in your mind. I came here for my energy first. I came here for my destiny first. And as someone who really thinks about I really want to reach my potential. I really want to see
what this incarnation is all about. What is CC capable of doing? I have yet to see so much, and I therefore have decided I'm going to have this selective solitude and spend a lot more time with just myself because I want to see what I'm truly capable of doing, and that's going to require me to spend time with just me and see what this version of me is all about. So I truly understand that other people are gonna start chirping.
I get that there are going to be opinions in your life that is going to cause you to be maybe even questioning your own journey, like should I be doing something different? They don't understand me. This feels quite isolating, but understand giving into their projection is only going to delay you because you can try to push down what you really want. You can try to push down
your dreams. They're gonna scratch their way back up. They're gonna try to come back around in the next season and the next season and the next season. And even if you try to push down your intuition for a little while, that intuition will get louder and louder and louder until you can't ignore it anymore. You don't have to wait for your saddurn return to be unapologetically yourself. You can decide right now, right here, I'm gonna live my life
on my own terms. I'm gonna live my life the way I want to. I'm not doing it any harm to others, and in fact, I'm re energizing and hydrating myself with happiness every single day. We don't have to wait for when we're about twenty nine years old for our saturn to return where we finally get the energy to stand up for ourselves. Why wait for things
to fall apart to just show up as authentically yourself? Why wait for something painful to happen when you can just start showing up as who you truly are right now. Oftentimes, when do we make change, it's when we're pushed because we're having such a painful experience that what was comfortable has become uncomfortable, and now we're pushed into the unknown. Why wait to get there? Another part of this is if you're in a season of living in the unknown,
let it be, Let it be, Let it be. You're allowed to exist within unknown territories because that's where you're gonna grow. We know the comfort zone like the back of our own hand. We know how to be predictable, we know how to operate, We know what that reality looks like and
how to exist within that reality. If you want to grow into the next version of yourself, you have to go out on a limb, and this is a healthy risk to take, you have to go out on that limb, try new things, experiment with yourself and see what life has to offer. If you want to be unapologetically yourself, you have to get to know yourself first. So instead of getting into someone new or under someone new, get into yourself. Date you find out what you like and what you don't
like. Do more of what you like, do less of what you don't like. Spend more energy and time doing the things you like, and less energy and time doing the things you don't like. When it comes to then showing up as unapologetically yourself, because you've now gotten to know yourself, you're
going to have more confidence to show up as that version of you. You know that you've been giving yourself the happiness, you've been giving yourself, the validation you've been learning you, So now you're not gonna have to outsource opinions
from others. You're not gonna have to be tethered to them. And it's almost like a magic switch internally where you now know, wow, I can just do what I want to do and show up how I want to show up, and I don't have to be looking outside of myself for these answers. A lot of this is just building trust with you, and if you're not sure where to start, baby steps. Baby steps build big steps.
Baby steps build big momentum. So if you're not where to start, just start taking yourself out on little dates to the water, to journal, to meditate, maybe out to a new restaurant for a hot girl walk. Take baby steps. Engage with new podcasts, new books, new interests. See where you land among these new energies. And the more you give to yourself and spend time with your the less you're gonna worry about how other people are
perceiving you, how other people have opinions of you. Now, if there are people in your life who their opinions are very loud, and maybe they're a parent, or a sibling or a good friend, you may have to sit down with them and say, look, I know you don't understand this. I love you, I know your opinions coming from love, but I don't want to hear it every second of the day. I'm married to this,
I'm committed to this. If this is what I'm gonna do, And if you can't be on board with this, I think you have to take a good look at yourself. If you can't be on board with this, and you can't really be on board with my life because it's my life and my decision and this is what I'm choosing to do. You have to lay down the law in your own life. You have to teach people how to
treat you. And when people realize that you're not reliant on them for their opinion, a lot of them will just stop giving it to you because they'll realize it doesn't have that much weight. Sometimes you need to have a conversation with them. Sometimes you just need to cut them out of your life.
You know what to do. Trust yourself when it comes to I'm afraid that I'm going to be embarrassed or Hugh, if I post that it's going to be so cringe, don't be afraid of the part of yourself that maybe feels like cringe. We need to really come into acceptance with the part of us that is cringing, because that inner critic isn't who you are. You aren't born criticizing yourself. You were born confident and magnetic. Your inner critic is
a language you developed based on the critics around you. Whoever was criticizing you growing up, you now internalize that and are criticizing yourself when you're saying, oh, I can't post that because that's so cringe or that's so embarrassing. That's not even your own thoughts. Those are thoughts you adopted from other people around you. So the next time you hear yourself saying that's cringe or that's embarrassing, you need to question that and say, well, why who says?
And do I even actually care? You're going to realize that so many of your negative thoughts aren't from you, but from your older sibling, or a parent, or a coach, or your bully from middle school. You're gonna realize that you're still listening to that nine year old bully instead of your own adult thoughts. Because that nine year old bully is living rent free in your head, still criticizing you, still causing you to cringe at yourself.
You're not that nine year old anymore, and that bully is long gone doing something else. It's time to reclaim your reality. The next time your inner critic is telling you that's cringe, that's embarrassing, you know what, I've unsubscribed from embarrassing. I unsubscribed from cringe. If someone thinks something I'm doing is cringe? Okay, that's a you problem. I don't care. I'm living my best life. Goodbye. If someone thinks what I'm doing is embarrassing,
again, that's a you problem. It tells me more about you than it says about me. That's not a in my business. The opinions of others, especially their negative opinions, are none of my business, and they're none of yours either. So let them, let them think you're cringe, Let them leave your life. Let people do what they want to do, and you have to give yourself permission and let yourself do what truly brings you joy and show up how you wish to show up. I don't even believe
in cringe and embarrassment anymore. I have so so unsubscribed from those notions and those emotions, because what are they but fleeting energies. They don't even mean anything cringe embarrassing? What does that mean? Feeling cringe or feeling embarrassment, or thinking thoughts that are in alignment with those emotions? Those are fleeting. Those will go away, but your dream will always be there and always scratching at you to go after it. So even if you have to have a
moment of being uncomfortable. That moment is temporary push through, because you're gonna be able to unlock new levels of yourself when you start doing and engaging with new behaviors. Even if you think it's cringe, even if you think it's embarrassing, if you know it's going to allow you to get closer to your dream, it's worth it. Let the temporary feeling of cringing and embarrassment run through your veins and say, I don't care, because it's gonna get me
closer to what I want. And again, that cringing embarrassment isn't even yours. It's you internalizing other people's opinions. And it's time you place your perspective back on your own pedestal. It's time you place validation of yourself on your own pedestal. It's time you place your happiness back on your own pedestal. This is the most revolution everything you can do when all we're taught to do is do what everyone else does, look like everyone else looks like, and
fall in line. I don't think so, I don't think so. The ego will try to rush you, but your soul knows to take your time even if you're spending time in the unknown, It's okay. Take time and energy to get to know yourself. Follow your bliss, and when you follow that bliss, it will drown out the opinions of others because the most miserable people are also the people who are most obsessed about what other people think of them. But when you act from your own compass other people, they can't
sway you because you not even in the first place. We're acting in accordance with them. If you want to free yourself, live in accordance with your own morals and your own values, and use that as your north star. I love you so much. The sparkling me as always honors the sparkling you. If you enjoy this podcast, please leave a positive review on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. It really helps this podcast grow. If not for me, do it for you because good karma. Be sure to get your copy of
show up as her. You can pre order that now. The links will be in the show notes, and I will see you in the next one. Sym I'm sorry, Stenogy s cancer, I go I got that, Dolgy no cancer, Strange cancer, Sphae cancer, spe