Mirror Image

need your advice. I agree. I relate to that so hard. Yeah. Um, Recently, I've been trying to take a little step back from social media. I haven't been posting nearly as much, not for any other reason, but just for myself to kind of work on my confidence without the comment and without the negativity. And I will say, like, I can't speak on this nearly as much as you can, Kenzie, because I don't know what happened for you to deserve negative comments.

But Kenzie, like, and I don't want to speak for you, like this is your thing to talk about, but it breaks my heart to see people online criticizing you for like the randomous things. Yeah, I I think I mean, this is this is an experience that I feel like I dealt with. What a couple of years ago, I think you took a picture of me in a bathing suit and I posted it, which I never did, I never really did, and I got a lot of hate comments,

you know, criticizing my body. And I turned the comments off because I was reading all of them, which is something I have learned to not do. If I so confident in that picture that I posted, I just need to let it be and let the people comment. And I I didn't do that. I read all of the comments. I was beating myself up over it. My friends were like responding to people and just bashing on them, just being like there's no reason, which is so nice. But I was just over and I turned off the comments.

I actually turned them back on recently. Really, yeah, I was. I was going through my Instagram and I saw that picture because you know when you just go back just to look at, you know, things that you posted. And I turned them back on because I was just like, this is so stupid. I seem weak because I just felt like I was being weak because I felt confident

in that photo. And but also it's okay to feel weak sometimes, right, But I was just over it because I was just like, I don't know why I let it get to me because I I liked that photo. I felt like I looked good in that photo, So I shouldn't let people tell me that I look a certain way. When I'm confident, I think like, that's a really that's a really good way to look at it. I think for us, we've been on Instagram for ever,

for as long as we can remember. I started on Instagram when I was nine years old, which is extremely young to start on Instagram then, but it was so different than to how it is now. I would take a photo on the Instagram app, take it in one take, and I would post it straight to Instagram. I wouldn't

think about it. And I miss that so much because now we not so much Kenzie, because Kenzie is amazing about just like taking her photos and then just being like, Okay, I choose these ones I'm and post them right now, I overthink and I take a bunch of photos and I'm like, ah, like these just don't look good. I don't feel good in them. I feel like people are going to think I look weird, and I feel like I have to live up to a certain standard of

what I've looked at on Instagram. I think we get into and I think I can speak on this for almost everyone. It's so easy to get into the rhythm of comparing yourself to everyone else, and it's a toxic cycle and I've tried to break it, but it's extremely hard to move on from that. It's it's hard to look at someone else and think, why don't I look like that? Yeah, I feel like I mean a lot. I feel like every teenager feels that way, even if you know I'm looking at someone that I'm like, Wow,

she's perfect. I want to be like her. I want to look like her. She's probably thinking the same thing, like I want to look like this girl. I want

to look like this girl. And I think it's so hard because it's so hard to feel satisfied with yourself, especially because of social media, which I mean that will never go away for anyone I know, But I I just I like now that girls are just hyping each other up, like I feel like especially now, And this is weird it because I feel like like to talk about TikTok again, but it's just like I feel like it made it such a safe space, like mhm. If some girl is showing off her body, everyone in the

comments is hyping her up. And I love that. Yeah, I love that. Also, I feel like we need to talk about the difference between so and we don't have to get into this as much. It's just more like sometimes and I think this is just the way that society has made it out to be, is that if a girl shows off her body, she's trying to sexualize

herself or she's trying to gain something from it. Why can't we just as girls, show off ourselves and our body to feel confident for ourselves because it makes us feel good, or we want to wear a crop top and show our stomach because we found confident in the moment. That's very much a thing too, you know. And I did get that a lot when I, like a few years ago. I think I was still trying to figure out what I was like, my style and what I

was wearing, and I was wearing a lot of crop tops. Obviously. Then I was getting a lot of hate for it because they were saying, you are dressing way too old, you are blah blah blah like all of the stuff. And I don't know. I just feel like I can dress the way I want and no one should tell me otherwise because it has nothing to do with them. Absolutely, it's your body, it's your photo, it's your like choices, you make those choices how you want to, you know, Yeah,

what do you think? Like? Especially now, like our generation we've said this, like we've touched on it and even other episodes. Is just the fact that like our generation is amazing and so ahead of the times. I feel like and just so educated and smart, And how do you think like looking back on old magazine covers, are looking back on old editorial photos of like models that were huge in the nineties or even before then, like seeing that image and seeing what the standard of beauty

was too now like how much has it evolved? So much? Like so much, and I and I love it. I love it so much. Every body type is accepted now and no one should. Like I never look at a girl and I'm like, oh, you're this way, You're just oh my gosh, you're beautiful. Yeah, exactly. And everyone is beautiful in their own ways. Everyone's flaws are beautiful in their own ways. Cellulite is beautiful, like stretch marks, are beautiful. I know it's hard to accept that. I we have

had on my time. I think in quarantine, when we were settling down and not being active and just eating whatever we want, I think like we got into the trap of being like, oh my gosh, new things are happening to our bodies that we've never seen before. Like what do we do? And I think like, first of all,

things are temporary. You know, your body fluctuates. You're going to go through phases of not feeling confident and then feeling confident, feeling fit, feeling not so fit, And I think like learning to just be okay with your body in that moment. I know it's hard, but it's something that we all should work on, right. And it also depends on the day for me, Like sometimes I will be super confident that day, I will look at myself in the mirror and I will be like, wow, I

actually feel good about my body. I actually feel good today. And then other days, you know, I I don't feel confident and that's fine because we're all going to have those days. And I feel like those days are really hard for all of us, but I mean it's going to happen. How do you do you ever. Okay, I

know we both feel this way. And this happens to us like quite often, is we'll feel really confident that day, well we'll get all cute, will look in the mirror and we're like, oh my gosh, okay, yes, let's do this, let's take a picture. Oh my god. And then we take the picture and we look back at the photos and we're like, that looks nothing what I thought I looked like in there two seconds ago. What happened? I know that I don't understand that. Yeah, I don't know either.

And it's always when I feel like not ugly, but I just don't feel like I look my best that day that the photos turn out great. It always happens. It's always flipped and you get all cute to take a photo, you take a selfie, you're just like, I can't do it. I think it's just like the idea of being more candidly, that's using air quotes, like trying to be more in the moment rather than like really like being strategic and planning it out and being like,

I have to get the perfect photo today. If you put too much pressure on it, then it's not going to happen, right, Yeah, for your social media, do you now because you've gone through the moments of like feeling hate from other people and feeling moments of like people criticizing you for your image, do you now just post for yourself or do you still have that in the back of your mind, like, oh my gosh, what are other people going to think when I post this photo?

In the moment, I like you've seen me even with other things, like other social media's I you know, take a picture, post it. I don't care. She literally does her TikTok video in one take and she's like great and post it, and but obviously it'll be like a few hours and I'll be like, oh wait, did I actually look at that picture? Like did I really look at that picture? And There's been several times where I've

just deleted a picture because of that. But most of the time, I'm just like, I really do not care because social media, like it's important to a lot of people, but it's not that important to me. I don't feel the need to look a certain way or like not look like this girl looked like this girl whatever. I just if someone doesn't like the way I look, then that's their fault because I don't care. So guys, we have to remember Instagram is a highlight reel essentially like

you for the for the most part. Now, like at least for me, I've realized I've been posting a lot of things that were like my best photo or I wait till I get a really good one to post it, rather than just being like I'm going to post a photo with my acne and in my sweats, Like that's hard for me to do, really hard, And I've never felt that way until recently or over the past year, because I'm too worried about not looking my best or

what people are going to say. Right, That's how I feel about, you know, posting bathing suit photos like that that I'm like, it's really hard for me to do because any other photo it's just like whatever. But I sometimes I just end up not even posting it. I'd like the picture, and I'm just like, well, this is not going to be on anything because of all the people being like why are you wearing a bathing suit,

why are you trying to show off your body? Why are you blah blah blah, and just calling me certain names, and it's just like, well, I'm at the beach. Do you expect me to wear a winter suit? Like? I don't know, but um, yeah, I think I've been getting more confident in that. Like I've posted a few bikini photos this year, and I are you for all of your photos because you look so good because you're you feel confident in the photos and I can see it. Thank you. It's like a thing like you can see

it when you like when you feel confident. Oh my gosh, you can really see it. And it's so exciting to see because like there was a huge phase and I think due to our dance background in our competition life, like we we're conditioned to look per ficked at all times. We have been wearing eyelashes, like fake eyelashes since literally the moment of like the age of four, and that is not normal. That is not something that is extremely

common like at all. But I think we've just grown up always being like, oh my gosh, we have to be the perfect like pretty girl, like we have to look our best always like smile, and I think now we're like, oh, that doesn't really translate into everyday life. Yeah,

it's just not normal. It's just really not I mean, I feel like a lot of girls in school like doing cheerleading and doing other things I can relate where it's just like once you're out of it, like once you're not competing, you're like, wow, I'm actually in the real world now, And this is so different than when I remember and crazy that we literally wear less makeup now than we did when we were like eight years old.

I know you were. You were beating my face at four years old, like literally like wing liner every day to class. But also we were being filmed, so that's like slightly different, like I wouldn't but why we did our makeup when we didn't need it? And I think I also gave up though, Like I've seen some clips where I'm just like, you're crazy and you look like perfect ballet but oh my god, I woke up one

to dance glass. I'm like, okay, probably honestly, what do you think is like the biggest thing that you've learned from online hate from comments about your body? What what is the biggest takeaway and like, what what have you

learned from that? Well? I think now I think of those people as just, you know, people that are bored and just want to do something with their life and they have nothing else to do but hate on someone because you know, the least you can do is just if you're going to comment, just say something nice or what is that saying? If you're if you don't have anything nice to say, I don't say it exactly. I

mean that's like cheesy, but it's true. It's literally it's so true, and I think everyone needs to, you know, learn from that, because I feel like a lot of girls, just even in school, are dealing with this with random people from their school commenting and just bashing on them, and it's so hard being a teenager in this generation. Like I just feel like it's so hard, and I feel like we just need to hype each other up.

That's literally all we have left. We have to celebrate each other as individuals for the good, the bad, the in between, because we're all individual for our own reasons and we're all beautiful in our own ways with our flaws included. Like and the hate will never go away, like I I know we will not. By doing this,

we will not change anything. But it's just like, the least you can do is just comment on a girl's photo and be like, you look good, and I do that on all my friends, even if it's like not even on the scale as big as Instagram, as you know, like we have a lot of people commenting, and whether it be that, or whether it be literally a girl at school and another girl bullys her and says you don't you look ugly or whatever it may be, that is not okay and that should not be accepted. That

should not be allowed, that should not be normalized. Hate bullying, all of that should never be normalized because that is just not realistic. I mean, unfortunately, it's like a thing. It's always been a thing, but it's heightened now because of the world we live in, because of like all these platforms, and I think, like we need to really speak up on like slowing all of the hate own because it's just not cool, guys, Like it really isn't.

And I know, like I think even me and you we've been guilty of like saying mean things to each other, but like we never really mean it, whether it be as small as like just looking at you and me, like you look so cute today, or I love your outfit or your hair looks really nice. Things like that your day. It makes it makes your whole day, Like when Maddie says, my outfit looks cute, I'm like that,

my outfit definitely looks cute. Another thing, Um, I think we should talk about mom because I feel like for me, mom has been so like she's just been great in this situation because you know, even being in dance competitions, there definitely have been some crazy moms with their kids about their body image and what they look like all the time. And I feel like Mom has always just been like, you do whatever you want, you eat whatever

you want. Are never our mom has never put us on a diet or never told us we have to eat a certain way or anything. I'm so lucky we have that. It's it's rare to have that, Kenzie sometimes like we're extremely lucky that she's just let us live how we want to. And she always hypes me up. Like sometimes I come downstairs and she's like, you look, your body looks so nice. You look beautiful today, And I'm just like, that makes me so happy that I

just have such an amazing mom. Like I can just come down the stairs and she's just even in my pajamas and she's like, you look beautiful, and it makes me so happy. I mean, I mean, she's she's gorgeous. I hope IOUs. She looks younger than she did ten

years ago. I don't know how that's possible. I know she did a little reverse reverse, but also like for her, I feel like she's gotten So we're talking about mom now, but I'm like, I feel like she's gotten so confident in her own body too, and it's it's it's a great example for us to look up to because it's like, oh, like, as a woman with two children, she's able to find a new level of confidence for herself and love what she's wearing, love how she's feeling like. It's it's inspiring.

She wears her cute little mini skirts. Sometimes I'm like, okay, Mom, you you look a little too similar to me and Kenzie. You're dressing too much like a teenager. But that's how it used to be. Like I remember we used to show up to restaurants and the same outfit. But now I feel like she dresses way different. She dresses and Lulu Lemon mini skirts, a bright T shirt and bright she was that matter T shirt and I love it. It's embarrassing, but I love it. I think we're past

the point of like feeling embarrassed. It's just like you look cute. I I think, like lastly, to like really tie this in is like we especially for people who have watched us grub on social media, you've watched us before we hit puberty, like we were babies. And I remember, like one of the first comments I ever got about my body was, oh my gosh, you gained weight. You don't look the way you used to look. And I'm like, yeah, because you were watching me when I hadn't even developed

bob yet, Like I hadn't go my period yet. I'm I was still very much a child and I'm still not even a full adult yet, and I'm like, my body is still going to change, Like sorry, I don't have the same like little body I used to have, Like I'm just I'm growing into womanhood. Like that just makes me mad because it's like it's also none of your business, like you have no right. You have no right to tell me what I used to look like and how I look now, you know what I mean, Like,

don't compare, because I don't know. It just makes me mad, you know, But like every body is beautiful. Everybody should be celebrated, like I said for the good the bad, thing in between, because everyone deserves to feel their best, everyone deserves to be celebrated for themselves. I think self love is just like a hard thing, but it's something that is so important and so like it just needs to be so accepted at this point in life and

maybe just go hype up someone today. Kenzie, you look so beautiful, you look you look stunning in your pds. Thank you. You look stunning in your cute outfit that I'm jealous those you take a picture of you, take a picture of you. Okay, we gotta go to post on Instagram. Thanks so much for taking twenty with us.

If you had fun, please give us five stars. You can follow us on Instagram at Take twenty podcast, email us at Take twenty at i heeart radio dot com, or you can call us at eight four four or Take twenty. See you next time.