"There is a Reason for Everything You've been Through" with Shaena Jasmat

Intro
Welcome to the "Sober Yoga Girl" podcast with Alex McRobs, international yoga teacher and sober coach. I broke up with booze for good in 2019. And now I'm here to help others do the same. You're not alone and a sober life can be fun and fulfilling. Let me show you how.

Alex
Hello, everyone. Welcome back to another episode of "Sober Yoga Girl". I am very excited to have Sheena with me here today. And Sheena is an empowerment coach from the UK, and it's really wonderful to have you here. So welcome, Sheena. How are you?

Sheena
I'm good. Thank you, Alex. Thank you for having me. I'm excited to talk to you today.

Alex
Thanks for being here. I'm super happy you're here.

Sheena
Yeah, me too. I've been wanting to do this for a while. I heard the "Be Sober Ladies" on your podcast first, and then you were on there not so long ago, a few weeks ago now? And I was like, oh, my God, I really want to have--

Alex
Well, I'm so happy you're here.

Sheena
Good to be here. And we just have a little chat, a few weeks ago. We did an Instagram live for--

Alex
Yes.

Sheena
Your series. Yeah, that was nice as well.

Alex
Yeah, I kind of lost momentum with that. I went for seven days and then no one was signing up, and then I dropped the ball. It was going to be a daily thing, and then seven days was long enough.

Sheena
It's hard stuff like that, isn't it? You have really good intentions, you know, good ideas. And I think it's okay to give things a go. And if they don't work or they don't keep going, that's all right. It was still good while it happened, but yeah.

Alex
Totally.

Sheena
I definitely think you know, we have a habit of feeling really crap if things don't continue or don't keep going the way we'd hoped when actually, it ran its course. Yeah.

Alex
Exactly. And it was great because it probably prompted us to then do this full-on podcast interview, which is amazing. So I was wondering if you could tell me a bit about yourself.

Sheena
Yeah. So I grew up in the UK. My parents are both Indian, so they grew up in India and came to the UK in the 60s. So, me and my sisters were born here and we grew up here. My parents are quite Liberal for Asian parents who weren't born in this country in comparison to other Asian parents. So we've got to do a lot of what we wanted when we were younger, but there was still that element of, stay in school, do your homework. You know, we probably can't go out and play, like when we get to our teams, you know, some of my friends would still be out late at night. We were like, you know, get home and stay indoors. And there was a little bit of strictness, but nothing compared to other people. So when I came around the age of 17, 18 because obviously, the drinking age in the UK is 18. I was allowed to drink and my parents were more of the opinion of, just be sensible about it. You know you're allowed. You're old enough. We're not going to stop you. Just don't be an idiot, you know. And I wasn't. If I think back now, I only really drink when I was out with friends, which actually wasn't that often because I was in college and I had a part-time job on the weekends, which is very early on a Saturday and Sunday morning. So the opportunity to be out all the time wasn't--it was quite rare, we went out for people's birthdays. I don't think I was responsible with it. Enjoyed myself and then went to University and you know, usual student drinking culture again, nothing about the ordinary. So nothing. I don't think anything really seemed to be of any concern until I probably got into my mid-20s and by which time I had moved away from the city I lived in for University and I'd moved to a new place, new job, have a few friends around me, but you know, ultimately a whole new location and kind of fresh start. And I said this to somebody the other day. I expected post University life in my new graduate job to be a little bit like friends in that I'd move it to this house or flat chair. We'd meet new people and would be socialized. I don't know. I just pictured something really cool where actually it ended up being in a job that was okay. I quite liked it. But the people there were not sociable even. And there were no after-work drinks, there was no going out for lunch. And that didn't really happen. And it was just the nature of the work I was doing, I guess.

Alex
Right.

Sheena
And I did have a few friends around me in that city, but they were all kind of in relationships and very committed to their careers. And I was out there trying to meet new friends, just, I don't know, have this young professional life. It didn't really happen that way. And I found myself quite lonely. I lived in a house of people I didn't know, but people also had nothing in common. They were nice people, but just you know, we didn't hang out. I spent most of my time just in my room, and I think it was about that time that I started to feel the loneliness was creeping in and the doubts of what am I doing? This isn't what I planned. This is what wasn't what I expected. And everybody else in, you know,  friends-wise seem to be doing all right. They seem to be settling into their jobs. They seem to be having quite a good time. Friends started to think about, you know, they were moving in with their partners and stuff, and I was just there in this house with I didn't really-- I remember it so much in the weekdays, but I'm pretty sure it happened. And then it crept and then the weekends are definite. But on the weekends, obviously, it wasn't evening it was-- I just started joining in the day, but it wasn't anything. I never got messy. It was just I started drinking because I was lonely and a bit sad and I think that really started to have an impact on my mental health. And I took a bit of time out of work. I didn't really know or recognize what was going on with me. I just, there's something not quite right. I started to have a lot of them, like digestion and stomach problems. At the time, I didn't know that it was linked to my well, ultimately I was quite depressed, didn't connect the two. So I was off because of the physical symptoms that were coming up. Whereas actually, I was just really, really low. And when I went back to that job, I realized I wasn't happy and maybe I should move. Maybe I should try somewhere else. My oldest sister lived in London. And she said, why don't you move to London? And I've had quite a few friends move to London. You know, it's new, big, it's London. It's exciting. How can you not have a good time there? How can you not you know, find excitement and adventure and all that kind of stuff? So I moved. I moved in with her and her husband, and I got a decent job, but it wasn't the job of my dreams. Basically, I don't think at that point well, yeah, I didn't have a job of my dreams to think about then. I didn't know what I wanted, so I fell into something that paid you know, a decent amount of money. But I'm not sure if it was the fact that I'd moved in with my sister that stopped me from meeting new people because I had a ready-made family almost to move in with that I didn't push myself to do, I think, what people would do if they move to new cities to go out, meet new people.

Alex
Right.

Sheena
So ultimately, I was lonely again, but in a different way. And also I didn't really move for the right reasons. So I wasn't going to find what I was looking for, especially when I didn't know what I was looking for. And a few years have been in--no, I was in London for a year, and then it was after that I thought, you know what, maybe I should go traveling. I felt that something is quite a random thing to decide to do because a lot of my friends or a lot of people tended to do that straight out of University, you know, either before University or a gap here or after. I went at 27, which is a little bit older than most people do it the whole backpacking thing. Didn't bother me. And that was the excitement at the time that I needed and was looking for. I mean, it's amazing. I went to Australia for a couple of months, and then from there I did all of Southeast Asia and had the best time. Absolutely the best time. I mean, you're there now. You just did something about Asia, that's like, dreamlike, magical place. You fall in love with it. And I did. Absolutely, just loved it. You know, but there's a time limit on things. And I did have to come home, and I came back just about the time that-- so it's 2008. It was when the recession started, and I couldn't get a job when I moved back home. So I kind of had gone from a period of not feeling that great, a bit low to let's just go traveling, let's just do something really exciting, which was great. And I came back to having to move back in my home with my parents and be unemployed for quite a long time because I couldn't work, I couldn't find a job. So I was suddenly back-- you know,  I was on a high, and I dropped back very quickly down to Earth to this reality of wow. And now I'm at 28, I'm approaching 30. And even more, like I felt like I'd taken a 56 back at this point. And my sister also returned. She was away at the time as well. She returned not long after I did. She's a few years younger than me. But I think similar situation that we both like, what are we doing? We're back home, we're struggling to find jobs. And I think we probably did a lot of drinking together. Again, I wouldn't say that we saw it as problematic then. I don't know if it was, but we had each other. So it didn't seem as bad because you just got somebody to you know, go out with and or drink at home with.

Alex
Right.

Sheena
But I was very adamant that when I hit 30, I just didn't want to be stuck there. I needed a plan. So we both agreed to move to Australia when I turn 30. And we did. And it was amazing for, you know, I say short time. I was there for three years. My sister had to move to New Zealand because she couldn't get a visa to stay. So, I mean, you know what it's like trying to get visas to stay in countries. And yeah, she did a year, and the work she was in was all government-based, so no sponsorship. So she moved to New Zealand, which is great because she's still there and loves it. And she's been there ten years now. So it's amazing. But I stayed, I got sponsored in a job, and I did start to fall into-- not fall. I started to create what I thought was the thing I'd been looking for. I had a good set of friends, had a decent job, and I met someone, and everything seemed to be finally working out. But really it was me forcing things, maybe? The person I was with was not the right person for me. He didn't even really want to be in a relationship. But I was getting to that point where like, what is wrong with me? And why does, you know, when you're just kind of wanting something to work and deep down, you know it's not right. So we weren't together even a year. We split up and then it was a messy break-up. Still trying to remain friends and silly things that you do when you should make a clean break and you don't. A few months after he returned to the Northern Ireland for Christmas, because that's where he's from, Belfast, and I think he'd been gone a week. When I found out I was pregnant.

Alex
Oh, my goodness.

Sheena
And it was like, wow, okay, now what do I do? What I hadn't mentioned to you is that although I've been searching and on this journey of like, where do I belong and where do I fit? And why is nothing really working out for me? You know, ultimately, all I wanted was to settle down and have a family. And now I'm 32 and the first time I'm presented with a situation of this could possibly be it. It wasn't, however, obviously expected it to be. I was scared. I was on the other side of the world without any family, with no real financial support. I wouldn't have got any government support there because I wasn't a resident. And he basically said, if you want to do this, I will support you. But I have to be honest and say that I think I will end up resenting you, the child, or the baby. I don't know what to do. What do you do in that situation? I think at the time I did what I thought the best thing was and I did terminate the pregnancy because all I could think of, was this person doesn't want to be with me. This person has just said, he's being honest and said he would probably end up resenting me. And knowing him for as long as I did, he probably would have. Yeah, he's going to support me. What kind of life is that to be stuck with a person who doesn't want to be in your life anymore and you're forced into it? And that is not the situation I want to bring a child up in. The hardest thing I've ever had to decide. He wasn't there, week for Christmas and I spiraled after that. I spiraled from a place of being quite sad because we'd broken up and it was a bit messy anyway, too. I've just done this awful thing and I couldn't live with myself. The drinking just got ridiculous out of control. I was signed off work. People didn't really know what to do with me. Friends were struggling to know what to say, know how to help, and I was just really, really depressed. And then basically because of the drinking, drinking induced suicidal thoughts because I just couldn't live with myself, I was just like, I can't believe I've done this. There were a few times I ended up in hospital. I hit a point where I can't live with myself. And at the time, you know, I can't explain whether did I really, really want to intentionally hurt myself or did I want to escape, or did I want whatever was happening in my head to end. It's a really weird place to be in and it's a hard one to explain. You know, I think everybody is different. Did I want to die or did I just not want to be there in that situation? And then you get to a point where you don't see a way out. Is there any way I can explain it? Honestly, for the next four, five months, I just went in a cycle of trying to pull myself out of that but kept hitting--it was just going round and round in circles because I wouldn't stop drinking. Eventually, my parents like, you need to come home. We can't look after you while you're like, thousands of miles away. So I moved back to the UK, and that was in itself, I mean, you know how stressful it is when you did it. You've done it very recently. You just decided right, I'm going. And obviously, I'd like to think really exciting. And with doing this big adventure, I'm just moving. I remember I booked my flight home on a Monday evening, and on the Friday of that same week, the shipping company was picking my boxes up and on a Saturday morning, I flew home. They're like, six days. Well, less than six days. And I pack up three years of my life, which I couldn't pack everything up. Most were left behind. So I came home. And tried to heal, and I think it started well. Came home, went to India with my parents, which was amazing because you know, we're better to go and be with your thoughts and heal and do things like yoga. I went to-- I spent two weeks in what they call a yoga hospital. So rather than a retreat, you had a doctor that met you on the first day and your treatment for the two weeks. But my treatment was all the holistic, Ayurvedic kind of massages and remedies and things like that. And I had a specific diet I had to follow, but that was all tailor-made for you know, the things I was dealing with at the time and included two yoga sessions a day and meditation and learning about all that stuff. And it was amazing, like, just the best experience. So it helped. It helped massively. What I think I underestimated was how much healing I needed to do. So when you come out with something like that, you're feeling good. And I just thought that was it. So I spent a bit more time in India. Then I came back to the UK. I'm still feeling quite good. So I threw myself back into life and I got a job and I tried to move on and move forward. And the job I got was amazing. Brand new start, new friendships. Everything was great until it wasn't again. And the reason it wasn't, I think, was because of little things that were setting me, bringing me down, knocking me back a little bit, we're just adding to all the things I hadn't really dealt with properly?

Alex
Right.

Sheena
So little things like meeting or going to another relationship which didn't work out. Those feelings of not being good enough for people, not being good enough and something wrong with me. Why can't I meet somebody who's just decent and you know, all about-- I was just like, what am I doing wrong? Why is it not working for me? Because you know,  at this point I'm getting to my mid-30s and all my friends are like on child number two, if not three, and second house and barely--. You know, all I can say is I've got a good job and I've got a car, which I know is not important. I know, but when everybody around you is doing things that society tells you, you should be doing and you're not, it's quite hard and no one can relate to you. And I think that's what I struggled with most is people couldn't relate to the times I did feel sad and did feel lonely and did feel a bit left out. You know, I remember trying to explain to people that when they go home and they say they've got no plans for the weekend, their no plans is still spending time with their partner at home and maybe doing stuff around the house. Me having no plans for the weekend meant that the only person I would sometimes speak to on the weekend was the person in the supermarket when I went food shopping. There's a difference when you are completely by yourself and I think all of these things-- I wasn't dealing with them. I wasn't processing them. I was just living in a bit of a God, my life is really crap and when is it going to get better? Not you doing anything to make it better. On top of that, drinking a lot, alone. And there were things that happened in the last before I got sober in the last three or four years prior to me deciding that's it it has to stop. That pushed me over the edge a little bit and then again, ended up in the hospital. Getting to the point where I just did not see the point of my existence anymore. I hated myself. I just thought there was absolutely no point in being here. This is going to sound ridiculous. I ran away once. Like what adult runs away? But I wanted to disappear. I remember I got in my car and I just went--

Alex
Wow.

Sheena
I was a high-risk missing person on the police-like database because I just got up and left. I don't know. I didn't know what I was thinking or planning or what, but maybe I just needed some space. I don't know, I can't-- again, something that's really hard to explain, can't really explain. And then it's February 2020. So just before locked down, just before you know, we've been told it's a pandemic and not just the flu from China or whatever. And I was at home. My parents are in India. They go every year to India in the winter. So those winter months were always the time I was by myself and I wasn't at my lowest, but the drinking was still happening. And I think I was just having a really bad weekend where I didn't want to speak to anyone, didn't want to deal with anyone. And my parents are trying to call because, well, they obviously now live in a life where they never know what's going on with me. They're always torn between they need to get on and live their life whilst always worrying about what I'm doing. Where my heads are. So anytime I didn't answer the phone automatically, they're going to think about what's going on. So I think I probably just didn't answer the phone over the weekend a few times or kept messaging saying I'm busy, I'll call later and they're not calling and you know, they're just getting like, what is going on? I'm sat there on a Sunday afternoon, watching TV. I was drinking. I wasn't wasted or anything, but I was you know, drinking. And the door hall of-- not the front door. I didn't even hear the front door. The door of the room I was in just suddenly opened and it's two of the neighbors from my street just in my house. I'm like, hey, my parents are freaked out and they called them and said, please, can you go around because one of them got a key. And said, please, can you go around and make sure she's okay? They thought I was dead.

Alex
Wow.

Sheena
And I think-- it was a turning point for me because up until then it would only be really, really close friends and my immediate family that knew how bad things got at times. No one else was aware of how bad it was. So that really woke me up in that-- these people are your neighbors. They've seen you grow up. We moved into that house when I was seven and I was 39 when that happened. So they've seen me literally grow up and now they're having to come and check on me. It's a really weird situation, but it really shook me. I think there was about a space of a week where I was sent to, but, yeah, sent to go and stay with my Auntie who lives just not far from here while I packed and my parents sorted out a flight to India. And February 10th, I left the UK, fly to India, and landed on the 11th. And it was-- I basically said to myself, when you land, that's it, things have to change. You will stop drinking, you will stop smoking, you will stop this. Whatever you're doing, you will stop it and you need to change. And that was the start of the sobriety journey.

Alex
Wow. What a journey that you've been on. And thank you so much for being so vulnerable and sharing. And at points when you told the story, there were tears in my eyes and I had shivers because you've just overcome so much. You know, there's this quote that you know, people or they often say that you know, the most beautiful people have overcome. It's like, what have you overcome in your past for you to be that way, you know? And that's like the truth for you. Since I've met you, you're just this bright, beautiful light, and you've just been through so much to become who you are today.

Sheena
You'll know. And people say all the time and it was hard and there were some horrible things that have happened. And you know, it's not until recently that I started doing the real healing and the real work that you realize you know,  there was trauma there. I didn't see it like that. I didn't see especially the pregnancy, because it was a choice. I thought I would call that trauma.

Alex
Right.

Sheena
It wasn't until a few years after that the therapist said to me, I don't think you've grieved. I'm like, yeah, but am I allowed to? Is that something like grief? You just assume that you're not supposed to or that's not a thing? Because it was all very, very messed up and it's like years of getting help. You know, I did get therapy and lots of psychiatrists, psychologists. You know, I've been through them all, and I've got help and little bits of useful advice and support from every single one of them. It wasn't until the last therapist I thought he was the one that just felt like he knew me better than I knew myself. He was the one that really, really helped me start turning a corner. But I think I did a lot of the work myself while I was in India. I had time, I had space. I had very little, you know, I didn't have to be worrying about jobs and finances and people. I was taken away from my normal, everyday environment and put in an environment that is, I think, just perfect for what I needed.

Alex
Right.

Sheena
And it allowed me to do-- it wasn't just thinking. I think I really genuinely went through the process of accepting a lot of what happened, forgiveness. Forgiving others, and obviously forgiving me, massively not just for the obvious things, but for the guilt that I carried for putting my parents and my family, my friends through so much pain. So I had to forgive myself in order to move on. And I realized that and I did a lot of that work then. But it's weird because when people say, well, how did you know what to do? And I can't put my finger on it. It's like it was just time. And I instinctively just knew this is how now I move forward, I have to accept it. I have to forgive, let it go. And things just naturally-- it feels like things naturally just progressed from there. And it makes it sound so simple and so easy. And I'm sure it wasn't. It's a bit of a blur now, but at the time, it felt natural and by the time I got back to the UK, I did feel ready for what do I do, next steps? And I remember going to see my old therapist. I stayed in touch with him and I got back and I went to see him. I said this is where I'm at. I'm actually feeling really good. And we had a good chat, and he said, I think you are. So I don't think there's anything I can help you with now. But I said to him, I was like, yeah, but I don't feel ready to completely go it alone. Maybe you can't, maybe you're not personally, but I need something. And it's at that point that I met my friend Laura. I'm calling my friend now. But at that point, she was somebody I contacted in her coaching capacity. And she literally was the perfect--you know, I didn't really know what coaching was at that point yet somehow she just appeared in my kind of little you know, world. And funnily enough, just happened to be-- I mean, of all the coaches you meet online and find online, she lived in the same town as me.

Alex
Wow.

Sheena
And there was just something that I thought, yeah, I need to work with her. And we only worked together for a short time, like a couple of months. And it transitioned from her being my coach to being a friend who now, obviously, when you've got coaching friends, you know you can go to them and they will help you talk through things. She's just there. She's just a friend now. And it's amazing. Spent my birthday with her in September. But she is the one that instigated the coaching journey, not that she planned. It was a conversation that we had. And I saw what she was doing. I was like, you know what, Laura? I was like, I think I'd like to do what you did. I think I'd be good at this, but I saw it as some kind of long-term goal that was years away in the future. Surely it takes a long time to get to that point. And she tells me now she's like, you saw it so far away. But I knew that it was actually around the corner, but I didn't tell you that. She said you have to figure it out for yourself. But with her guidance. So I kind of went on and I did an NLP training course as a practitioner. And a lot of the things I think I use my clients are just from my own experiences and the fact that I've done the work. I've been on the journey myself. I've done training, I've done courses to kind of back all that up. But a lot of it is for me, just kind of coaching from what I know, because I think that's one of the best places to coach from genuine experience rather than a book or a course.

Alex
Absolutely.

Sheena
And then that was about the time that I came across be sober.

Alex
It's amazing. So tell me about the work you do with them?

Sheena
So initially, I found them because I suddenly realized I was about six months sober at this point. And I think lockdown in the UK was just coming to an end and they were going to ease restrictions. And I thought I know that my friends or at least people I thought were friends. I'm not saying that they were bad people, but people from my previous life, shall I say, we're not going to be good for me anymore. And I needed to meet people on the same page. So I started looking around and I found "Be Sober". And I noticed that they did social events in Manchester where they're based. So I just said, do you guys do anything like, near Birmingham, which is where I, well, just outside Birmingham. And they said, we don't at the moment, but what we're doing is actually looking for ambassadors to start their own events under the umbrella of "Be Sober" in their own area. Would you like to apply to be an ambassador? I thought about it and I thought, oh, God, I only wanted to kind of join these things. I didn't want a role. But then I thought about it and I thought, I know me. If I had joined just as a member or just as somebody to attend events when I felt like it, I would have stayed in the background. I would have just probably shown a bit of interest, but not really put myself out there.

Alex
Right.

Sheena
And then I thought, you know what? The ambassador role is giving me responsibility. It keeps me connected with the sober community and it's probably what I need to do. So I said, right, okay, let's do it. And the best decision I ever made, absolutely the best decision I've made in that year, joining August last year. So just over a year now. And the people that I've met, the things I'm doing because of my journey with them, the coaching journey has been going alongside it. But I think me being the person who will now come on a podcast or go on an Instagram Live with somebody who hosts the drop-in sessions with the community, that has come from the confidence that Be Sober's bought out of me.

Alex
It's amazing.

Sheena
They just help me transform who I was. I just can't like, the things I have on my calendar for the week. And I have to just go, who is this person? Who is this person that is scheduling in things like you know, Instagram Live with Lisa, and then Alex's doing the podcast. And then I got--it's madness.

Alex
Yeah, it's incredible. It's so incredible.

Sheena
I put a post out just the other day when I kind of had one of these moments where I just sat back and go, this is me now. I thought, oh, my God, I'm genuinely proud of myself because I didn't think I had it in me. And it was just this nice feeling. Yeah, you did it. And all that pain and suffering and all of that was worth it. Maybe not the right kind of words, but there was a reason for it all.

Alex
Right.

Sheena
Because without it, this Sheena wouldn't exist.

Alex
Right? It's incredible. Honestly. It's such an amazing transformation that you've been on. And when you think of the "Be Sober" thing, for example, we wouldn't even know each other if it weren't for "Be Sober". Right? I came to one of your lounges, and that's how we connected, and here we are. And so it's so true. Just putting yourself out there and taking leaps and risks and joining these things, that's even something I'm really trying to take initiative now is like I'm so comfortable in my little community that I've built, and I'm really trying to step outside. And that's where you know, me coming to be sober or I'm exploring other sober recovery communities and just like finding-- getting outside your comfort zone because amazing things come from it.

Sheena
Yeah, 100%. And that's it, isn't it? Because now I guess the community that you've created is your comfort zone. For me, "Be Sober" is has become mine. And it's little things, like a friend of mine, I call her a friend now, and she is somebody I connected with on Instagram. Who's not part of "Be Sober" but she was holding a sober event a few months ago, and we've been talking lows. We just haven't met. And she invited me to this event and she said you know, you're coming as my guest. So don't worry about-- you know, you don't need to get a ticket or anything. You're my guest. But the fear that put in me to step out of the "Be Sober" world and go to a different and to meet people in person and people I hadn't met, and it was so scary, and I did it, and I'm so glad I did. But even when you've done so much, like so much I've done in the last year that stepped out of my comfort zone that now has all become comfortable. And now it's like pushing again. What's next? What do we try now kind of thing? It's just been our most amazing journey. And I feel a bit like, can I say, does it sound a bit cheesy to say, oh, I've been on this great journey, but genuinely, you catch yourself and you end up smiling or just you get this feeling inside like, oh, my God, this is my life now. And I love it. And I think the best part is when I see people like you who, same kind of journey and where you are now. And I get excited because I know so much is still to come. I'm so early days in mine.

Alex
Yeah. How long are you?

Sheena
I am 22 months sober.

Alex
Amazing. So almost two years, two years in February.

Sheena
It's is two years in February. And I think, you know, coaching wise and Be Sober, around Be Sober just over a year and coaching for just under a year.

Alex
Yeah.

Sheena
And that's a lot of different things, I think all been happening at the same time. So a lot has been going on, but it's all going in the right direction. Yeah, I love it.

Alex
And I have one more question for you. So if you have any advice for someone who wants to quit drinking, what advice would you give them?

Sheena
I always say and I always think that a lot of people make a mistake at the beginning of the journey if this is what they want to do is thinking that stopping the drinking will be the hard part, just stopping the drinking. But actually, what a lot of us discover is the drinking is just a symptom of an underlying something over there. And I'm not saying you've got deep, dark, root problems, but you may not be aware that the reason you're drinking is something else. And it's that what you need to address. So, yes, get a group of-- the cravings and the triggers and all of that kind of stuff, you know, do the reading of the Quit Lit, listen to the podcast. Yeah, amazing. Use all that kind of stuff that is out there now. But be prepared to go deeper because you will have to go deeper if you need it to stick because I think what people do is they're like, oh, but I'm listening to the podcast and I'm reading the books and it's not working yet. That's not going to get you sober, but that's going to help and it's going to make you feel like you're not alone and you're going to find relatable content. But you need to ask yourself big questions, which are within you, not in a book, not in a podcast. You've got the answers to why you drink and how to stop.

Alex
So true.

Sheena
I think that makes it sound really scary, but I think and maybe this isn't for everybody. Maybe not everybody has to do that kind of digging around. But I think more often than not, there is a bigger thing underneath that you just need to address.

Alex
Right. Well, Sheena, thank you so much. Honestly, I really appreciate you coming and being so vulnerable and open and sharing everything that you went through to get to who you are today. And I think it's really going to resonate and inspire so many of the listeners. So thank you so much for sharing.

Sheena
Honestly. Thank you, Alex. It's been so nice being on here with you. Thank you for having me.

Alex
And if there's anything coming up or anything you want to share with us about any coaching programs you have or any offerings.

Sheena
The one thing I have got coming up is might be a bit short notice and it is based on where people are located in the world. I've just got a workshop next week, which is just about a bit of goal setting and intention setting for 2022.

Alex
That's amazing.

Sheena
 Just fun, kind of hours going through a few guided visualizations and stuff to make sure that everybody has the kind of year that they deserve.

Alex
I love it.

Sheena
I'm sure they'll be able to find me via your podcast.

Alex
Amazing.

Sheena
That's something that's coming up.

Alex
Perfect and yeah, I'll put all the links to all of your information in the podcast episode as well so anyone can find you interested.

Sheena
Thank you.

Alex
All right. Thank you so much. And I'm sure I will speak with you soon again.

Sheena
Bye.

Alex
Bye.

Outro
Thank you so much for tuning into this episode of "Sober Yoga Girl" with Alex McRobs. I am so, so grateful for every one of you. Don't forget to subscribe so you don't miss the next one and leave a review before you go. See you soon. Bye.